Just me, explaining how my code works.

Quality code I made, as always

This made my Day...

Startup Quote...

This describes my feelings so well...

LOL difference is clear

Every job interview question ever

This.

sad story

I've never had a great experience working with designers, but this one might be the laziest! Props if it's for a friend and unpaid though.

Types of headache 😂

Yep lol

True story

Developer (master's degree, -bleeping- smart guy, no kidding) was bragging on how he made a piece of code 3x faster (with the usual pinch that the original dev was incompetent) and spent nearly 6 weeks working on it (wrote his own parallel-foreach library because Microsoft's parallel library was "too slow").
I was the original dev and he didn't know I had my own performance counters where I broke down each stack (database access, network I/O, and the code logic).
Average time was around 5ms (yes milliseconds) and worst case was around 10 seconds. His '3x improvement' was based on the worst test case, which improved by about a second. Showed our boss my graph (laughed out loud, said 'WTF', other curse words) and the dev hasn't spoken to me in weeks (I say 'hi' in the hall and he keeps walking)
Take that master's degree and high IQ and shove it.

Choose wisely.

When you say "almost 2" instead of 1.7 because you're not sure your customers understand the decimal system.

z-index so high this div will end up on my upstairs neighbor's phone

I use BitBucket, not GitHub, but I can't add it to my profile because the repo section only accepts GitHub.

!Rant

Convinced my girlfriend to learn UI/UX design. She landed her first job last week and it's a good one :)

So proud

Actual message i got today from a friend: "How to send a GET request with css"

I dont know him anymore

Girl: Can you make me an app?
Me: What kind of app do you have in mind?
Girl: I want it to be... like an app!
Me: Sounds a bit to difficult sorry.