Dear self proclaimed wordpress 'developers/programmers', kindly go fuck yourself.

I'm not talking about wordpress devs/designers who don't claim to have a better skillset than they have and are actually willing to learn, those are very much fine.

I'm talking about those wordpress people who claim that they're developers, programmers or whatever kind of bullshit which they're obviously not.

"A client's site crashed, you have to fix it!!!!!" sorry, come again? It's YOUR client's site. It's hosted on our hosting platform meaning that WE are responsible for KEEPING THE SERVERS UP AND FUNCTIONING.
You call yourself a wordpress 'developer' with 'programming experience' for 10 years but the second one of your shitty sites crashes, you come to us because 'it's your responsibility!!!'.
No, it's not. Next to that fact, the fact that you have to ask US why the site is crashing while you could easily login to your control panel, go to the fucking error logs and see that one of your facebook plugins crashes with a quite English error message, shows me that you definitely don't have 10 years of programming experience. And if you can't find that fucking article which tells you exactly where the motherfucking error logs are, don't come crying to us asking to fix your own fucking bullshit.

"My clients site got hacked, you have to clean it up and get it online again ASAP!!!!" - Nah, sorry, not my responsibility. The fact that you explicitly put your wordpress installation on 'no automatic updates' also doesn't help with my urge to fucking end you right now.
Add to that that we have some quite clear articles on wordpress security which you appearantly found too difficult (really? basic shit like 'set a strong fucking password' is too difficult for you?), you're on your own.

"I'm getting an error, please explain what's going wrong as soon as you can! this is a prio 1!!!!" - Nope. You were a wordpress dev/programmer right? Please act like one.

I'm not your personal wordpress agent.

I'm not your personal hacked wordpress site cleanup guy.

I'm not even a fucking wordpress professional. No, I'd rather jump off a bridge than develop wordpress bullshit for a living.

That you chose to do this, not a problem. Just don't rely on me for fixing your shit.

I'm sick of cleaning up your bullshit.

I'm done with answering your high prio tickets about bullshit which any dev could find out with just a few minutes of searching.

Oh your wordpress site isn't showing up so high in google? Yeah sure, shoot a ticket at us blaming us for your own SEO mess. I'm a fucking sysadmin, not a SEO expert.

I'm fucking done with you.

Go die in a fucking corner.

When I thought I hacked Facebook.

I somehow managed to "inspect element" and changed a couple of the words on the page. I reloaded the page and all my work was gone... I tried it again and again then googled how to hack. I then learned how to make batch scripts. the rest is history.

THE WORST PRANK ATTEMPT

If i remember true, it was 2012. april fool day..

me and my co-worker (we were the founders) decided to fool our members (we had a script's unofficial support forum). so, we did the plan. we register another account on march and wrote a few useful messages with it. help guys with that fake account (named as Root).

on fool day, we move the site to hidden folder (but didnt backup it) and added an index file as "hi, i am Root. you know me who am i. i hacked this site and deleted all dbs. cya later" (in turkish of course)

and we sit our chairs, began the watch our messages from facebook,skype,whatsapp etc..

we act like we are in trouble and we cant solve the problem.
at the same time, one of the our crew, decided to help us :D
so, he contact with our server's management crew. they dont know the fool too :)

server management looked up the situation without try to contact with me or my co. and we got an email from server like that
"hello tilkibey and impack, we just realized your site is hacked. so we delete your all ftp and db for safety. please contact with us asap"

we shocked and contact with them, explain the truths and request the recover our site (because we though they backup site before deleting all things). but they didnt backup it :(

so, we recover our last backup which is got nearly 10 days ago :(

yes i am a developer, no i have not hacked facebook.

So, the other day a friend of mine called me. It's been years that I haven't talked to this girl. She says "can you do me a favour?". I asked "what?". To which she replies "My Facebook account has been hacked. Can you do something and destroy the guys pc? Don't let him create any other account or even let him use the internet. Ban him from the internet or do something.
And I was like

Somebody took that "let's hack Facebook" meme waaay too far

The worst thing about being a dev is explaining to these fucktards that facebook can't be hacked.
But what is even worse, is when these dipshits say that i am a bad dev for not hacking facebook for them.
Use that big stupid head to sometimes think straight and stop being a little twat.

We all have that one friend who says he "hacked someone's facebook account", and all he did was peek while that person was typing his/her password....

So, anybody aware of this? Does anybody know what the vulnerability is?

I can troll all day by opening Devtools on a browser and change <input type=“password“> to <input type=“text“> they think i hacked google, facebook and their email acoount

Legit questions!
How does facebook secures itself, we never heard news like facebook hacked, user data stolen, recently with ddos, twitter and other websites were affected but not Facebook?
Are they superhumans?

I understand the muggles on Facebook saying it was Apple and Amazon that were hacked, but here on devrant where people know WTF is up, I'm still not seeing people say where the hack actually took place, and what makes the news truly terrifying: SMC.

Friends, gather round for a story of "the user".

Two days ago I assisted a friend in reviving their scammed Instagram account with final confirmation it was back in their possession yesterday. I stated "make sure you clean out phone numbers, emails and change the password. WHATEVER YOU DO DON'T USE THE SAME PASSWORD"....I bet you know where this is going....

Queue 6:45am: "HELP! THEY DID IT AGAIN! THEY TOOK MY FACEBOOK THIS TIME TOO!" as a safety measure, I told her to link them for recoverability.....not thinking you just created a bridge to the facebook...

Now We're going through EVERY account BY HAND and changing EVERY password for EVERY service and enabling MFA. We've also learned the power that the forgot password button wields for everyone.

ProTip: If your friend was "hacked" be patient, friendly and soft to get every detail...sometimes you learn more and can position them better.

Now I'm upset with myself because I couldn't save their accounts and at this point we've lost the only footing we had to them. Social Media is a curse.

Once at a foreign airport I decided to kill the time on Facebook... There were only 20 minutes of WiFi for free. After 20 minutes I opened terminal and hacked over the restriction...