"I can write a script to do your job"

Fuck I love my job, my boss and I are absolute food fanatics and talk about weird and wonderful things we cook...

He knows I bloody love curry so he brought some in for me to have for lunch and he's bringing me a shit load of fresh grown vegetables...

And to think I chose IT over being a chef.... (Still no regrets)

If you get into a fight that concerns whether Android or iOS is superior, you’re not using technology... it’s using you. And it’s sad.

I was reviewing one dev's work. It was in PHP. He used MD5 for password hashing. I told him to use to password_hash function as MD5 is not secure...

He said no we can't get a password from MD5 hashed string. It's one way hashing...

So I asked him to take couple of passwords from the users table and try to decode those in any online MD5 decoder and call me after that if he still thinks MD5 is secure.

I have not got any call from him since.

They can just buy a different name right ?

Maintenance

what a relief 😂

SO in a nutshell XD

Yesterday we all stopped working to admire the weather from our office.

that's how we became developers :D

My world of devRant just lit up:
Did you know:

1) you get free stickers it a rant hits 30++ (you need to write a mail)
2) they have a YouTube channel with cartoons which are hilarious!!!!! I fucking love the sound effects 😍 since they r based on real rants it’s even better!
Shoutout to the YouTube channel!

Do side projects in no more that two weeks, otherwise it’s doomed.

Just plain facts

*Creates empty node web project in visual studio*

Let's have a look at the default configuration... Oh look the default port is 1337... Microsoft... Please stop trying to meme... Please

He is going places.

stairs which is started from zero :D

Happy to add another 50MB

Thanks, Facebook!

When your gf isn't a Dev but still tries to surprise you on your birthday with an HTML cake. But your OCD is killing you because of the mistakes

Src: IG - developers_team

A small typo error can make you rethink about your existence 😂😂

A: "Hey let's move our server rack to this room tomorrow so we can set it up."
Me: "sure, 11:00?"
A: "11:00 it is"
Me: arrives 11:00, waits till 12:00.
A: arrives at 12:00 "sup man, sorry I'm late, let's do this"
Me: annoyance-level 6/10 "sure... let's go"
A: "hold on, this guy wants something"
Me: waits another 45 minutes.
annoyance-level 9/10

I just went to cafeteria.
Fuck you, wasting almost 2h.
I stood up early for this bs.

User: "What should I do? I'm confused."

Every time I write Strong instead of String i do 10 push ups.

Everytime I need to edit a document

Girlfriend: What's your biggest fear?

Me: That machines take over the world.

Girlfriend: What?

Toaster: What?

They are here

This comic defines my life, still I am loving it :)

Defragmentation

[via https://twitter.com/jeremiahtolbert...]

I went to Paris for my first interview (that was 1989) for a job of Unix kernel developer. All dressed up. I step out of the elevator and see a young punk with scruffy hair and different colour shoes. I reckon he must be the pizza delivery guy. I ask him "dude, can you please point me to the CEO's office for interview". He said "sure, follow me man, I'll show you". We arrive at a desk, he sat down in the big chair and looks at me with a big smile and says "Ok dude, here we are. I am the CEO. Now let's see how good you are!"
I got the job. And 26 years latet, last week, amazing coincidence: I met him again at a trade show in Paris ... with the same coloured shoes. How cool is that!!!

Fuck applications which repeatedly try to grab focus while starting up in the background. Yes, I clicked your little icon, you attention whore. But I'll fucking alt-tab to you when *I* am ready.