i started using reddit i few days ago

!r/ProgrammerHumor

Projects - Motivation == null

To all SJWs (including hidden ones on dR): Fuck you!

Really!? WTF would you even write a confirmation message reminding me to contact the admin if I didn't request my password change on this screen!?!? Of course I wanted my password changed, I just entered my new password. That type of crap is what you should e-mail me AFTER my password changes.

This one’s both cute & funny

Overheard from a sales call (involving web templates):

"Sometimes I really don't get our devs. They come up with all these ridiculous meaningless acronyms for everything, and yet they go mental if you dare shorten Javascript to Java."

Login :
Username - admin
Password - admin

Is your brain single threaded?

It was just kidding 😂💔

Hey government, can I have the latest version of wiretapper ?

Even debugger can't beat this.

Such a madlad

Answer to all bosses, managers and TLs...

2 weeks 😄😂

Did a very tiny migration for a client which would normally be done against our hourly rate but decided to do it for free as it would take me like 5 minutes and it was a very important thing for him and he actually offered to pay.

Fuck it, he'll be very happy, it doesn't take me much time and I know my boss would approve.

Did the migration, messaged the client and he thanked me.

Next day a cake arrives at work with my name on it and "thanks for helping us with the migration!"

Now that's how you make my fucking day!

Amazing, oh wait...

a great opportunity

Semi-colon:- c'mon babes!
PYTHON:- I don't give a fuck to you!;)

They can just buy a different name right ?

How to calculate walking distance

Km/m/inch ❌
3 songs ✔️

Oh my god, PHP is so dead.. Node.js is totally kicking ass by powering 0.6% of the internet!

Implementing the application exactly like the client specified, because they won't listen.

Try if you can

My doggo and my daughter...

Mac: Suddenly turns off
Me: Fuck my code..F***
Mac: No response at all
Me: reset SMC etc etc
Mac: I am dead (no battery detection, dies after 10 min on power adaptor)
Me: Skips a heart beat..(Git, oh yea git)

**Takes Mac to store, After diagnosis**

Apple Freaking Genius (AG): Your Mac has a mother board problem it needs to be replaced.
Me: Hmm what is the problem exactly??
AG: Issues in logic board and some other components.
Me: How much?
AG: Out of warranty so $$$ (60% of original amount)
Me: (wtf?) Really
AG: It's entire motherboard replacement .. bla bla

**Bring it home > open > everything seems ok on multimeter as per circuit diagram > finally finds a voltage drop that is not consistent > minute short circuit > remove > check further > nothing else > reassemble > hit power button > starts fine > freaking battery detected > works fine**

0 $ repair

Fixes two more devices @ 0 $ in friend circle

Builds a raspberry pi backup laptop with 3d printed body..Ubuntu.. you know can't live without a computer

#ThugLife #Engineer

What the ...😂

> be me
> last hour in office
> trying to figure out solution
> figured out a plausible solution
> write the code
> power outage before I compile

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Well, on the bright side I committed it locally...

Just received a test for a job I'm interviewing for. I was interviewing for a C++ position. Practice test: Create an REST API using SpringBoot, Spring Data, document with Swagger and implement continuous integration testing.

To be fair, I also mentioned I'm fluent in Java. But I've never touched SpringBoot or done any backend webdev, since my intention was to never get near it.

Deadline: Sunday. Game on...

OMFG GOD BOSS!! JUST TELL ME ALREADY EVERYTHING I HAVE TO FUCKING KNOW ABOUT THIS FUCKING FEATURE!

EVERY FUCKING TIME I FINISH IT YOU GIVE ME SOME DETAIL THAT I HAVE TO REWORK PIECES OF IT!!

DUMB PIECE OF SHIT!!!

I added a “shake-to-snow” hidden feature to an iOS app that worked only on December 25th. You’d shake your iPhone or iPad and the entire screen would start snowing for 10 seconds.