Product was not thrilled with our estimates we gave them for the next phase of our project. So they got the veep to give us 2 new team members - a new hire and an existing senior - in hopes that it will allow us to finish a lot sooner.

Because 9 women can make a baby in a month, right? Gods forbid we consider removing anything from the scope of this phase. Mind you, there's still another phase planned after this one before we even release the product.

Be Linux Pro

Yesterday's (scheduled and adhoc) meetings:
10:30-11:00
11:00-11:30
12:30-1:30 (adhoc)
1:30-2:30
4:30-5:00
6:00-6:20 (adhoc)

Today's (scheduled) meetings:
9:30-10:00
11:00-12:00
12:30-1:15
1:30-2:30

Tomorrow's meetings include a 1:1 with my boss who will invariably ask why I'm not done on this "should take a week" project that I've had for a week, despite that he just unblocked me on yesterday morning, and I've had nothing but meetings since...

Fucking hell.
They fill my day with shit spaced out just enough to waste practically my entire freaking day so I can't get anything done, conveniently forget this, and then have the audacity to yell at me for not finishing my tickets. Of course I didn't finish! You all were too busy blabbing at me every day for the past fucking week! (Oh, and do they listen if I have something to say? Of course they fucking don't.)

Also, as a secondary rant, the product douchebag files tickets (usually complex as hell tickets worded to appear trivial) with enough missing information to make missing large sections of them easy. If I ask him for clarification, he tells me to read the ticket, and if I insist, he gets all exasperated and quickly zooms through the site faster than I can follow, shows maybe half of what's in the ticket, and asks why I don't know how to do any of this yet. After I finish his shit ticket (and true to his douchebag nature) he blames me for missing several of those pieces he never outlined or showed, and insists that I obviously don't test anything. And because that's clearly not douchey enough, the fucking sack of shit also goes behind my back and trashtalks me to my coworkers, tells them he can't trust me to do a simple fucking thing, and that he's given up on me.

What the FUCK is wrong with these people?

User: "Why isn't this process updated? There's something wrong with your system."

Me: "Did you submit the request?"

User: "Uh yeah I'm sure I did..."

Me: "Go submit the request again." (they never did the first time)

User: "I don't know how. Will you show me?" *shows user how to do it* "Ok I did it now."

Me: "You did it wrong, you need to resubmit it."

User: "Ok I resubmitted it."

* a week later *

User: "The process still hasn't shown any progress."

Me: "You didn't resubmit it like you said you did."

User: "Will you show me how to do it again?"

* fuck me *

Me: "Sure..."

Process works as expected and everyone lives happily ever after, except the developer that knows it is just a matter of time till the next user blatantly lies, has no respect for anyone's time, and demonstrates a complete lack of desire to care about their job at all and just wants to bitch and complain like a typical lazy ass-hat.

Final episode of leverage redemption, they used an Android phone. Have you ever seen a TV series where they don't use an IPhone?!

Cracks start small 😋

Renaming your master branch to "main" is racist. When Git was created, there were no connotations related to slavery. Also, the word "master" has many meanings, and in the context of computer technology, "master" has nothing to do with slavery.

When I tell that to people, some of them say "but wait, you're white, so you by definition can't understand feelings of black people".

Feelings come from one's mind. Proposing the situation where I can't understand something because "only black people understand it" implies white and black people being different in their cognitive abilities, and that's fucking racism right there.

Ability to understand cultural and historical phenomena does not depend on race. Anyone who says that without a biological proof is a racist.

I find it ironic how it's microsoft who almost enforced this on GitHub while themselves supporting literal concentration camps: https://github.com/drop-ice

Today in Cursed Java error messages, this beauty: `java.net.MalformedURLException: no protocol: "http://knowledgebase-api.development.svc.cluster.local/..."`

Yes, no protocol. You read that right. There is in fact a protocol there.

I'll point names today

Boss: Quick! The Xero integration is not working anymore!
Xero Documentation: place your client secret in the HEADERS
Me: * places client secret in headers *
Xero API: Bad Request!
Me:
*re-reads documentation*
*creates new client secret*
*1 hour of trying*
Hmmmm
* places client secret in request body, not in headers *
Xero API: Ok!

UPDATE YOUR DOCUMENTATION
TELL US ABOUT IT IN THE CHANGELOGS

I was wondering why my tutor needs a whole ass week to accept my MR.

Today he rejected one, so I got a chance to look at whatever he's doing.

He's checking line by line every single test I make and creates a variable for each dumb thing.

𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵(𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘪𝘥).𝘵𝘰𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘌𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘭(𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘖𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘪𝘥)? No, this is bullshit.

𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘐𝘋 = 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘪𝘥
𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘖𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘪𝘥 = 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘖𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.𝘪𝘥
𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵(𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘐𝘋).𝘵𝘰𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘌𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘭(𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘖𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘐𝘋)

I don't even know why you would take a week to accept a merge request when all you're doing is creating variables for things you use only once. I'm not even mad, I'm not ranting, I just need to know why would you do such a thing

Senior Management: We are severely disappointed in the timeliness of the two apps you built this year. You had budgeted 3 months for one and it took 4 months and the other was budgeted to take 4 months and took 5 months. We understand that we doubled the requirements halfway through and but that doesn’t take away from our need for you to deliver on time. We provided you with two extra devs on the project! We know they were novices and you had to train them from the ground up during the project, that doesn’t matter. The extra resources should have helped you but your lack of leadership ability is what caused them to hold you back. We know our other team with a budget of 6 months took 2 years on their project and was still unsuccessful but that is a different scenario! That was a pre-built 3rd party ERP plugin, way more complicated and nuanced than simply building and deploying something from scratch. Yes we’re aware your projects were the only successful tech projects at the company this year, that’s just luck and coincidence. The next app we need you to build in 6 months, no questions asked. It needs to consolidate and tie together our 3 different ERPs. Everything that we need out of these products that they don’t do out of the box we need you to wire up. We will decide the exact requirements in a month or so, for now just get started. Yes your apps changed the way we do business and allowed us to complete projects smoother than ever before while saving millions of dollars in wasteful and archaic processes that is OLD NEWS. Stop bringing it up. The successes of yesterday are the status quo of today. Don’t expect any new resources either, you clearly can’t handle them. You will now be giving status updates to 3 different managers as a corrective action to your missed deadlines in order to ensure the timeliness of future deliverables.

Dev: …

This is what happens to overworked PMs.

Me: When users create accounts with social logins, they don’t have passwords in our database. If they try to enter an email and pw on the login form, what do you want the error message to say?

PM: Can we add a modal that says “Your account doesn’t have a password, set one now.” And have a password field?

Me: ☠️ That…would…allow…anyone…to…hijack…an…account…

PM: Right. Never mind.

Hey Visual Studio, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK MY CODE IS SUDDENLY READ ONLY YOU BLOATED PIECE OF SHIT

I cannot even function right now with how angry I am. If you're a python developer, don't take offence to this unless it describes you.

All the python devs I have ever met so far are pompous arrogant cucks that can't even get out of their own way to save themselves. They make EVERYTHING so fucking complicated and complex that the whole point to a project becomes moot.

Instead of understanding HOW a thing works, their answer is ALWAYS rewrite it how THEY want it to work.

They have what we used to call "little-man" syndrome. They're so concerned that they aren't perceived as intelligent that they overcompensate by making the wildest and most fucked up changes to a project I have EVER seen.

They have gone so far as to break the original functional components of a project just to meet THEIR definition of a healthy python project.

I don't hate the language, but GOD DAMN I HATE THE DEVS.

If this describes you, fuck you. Seriously, just fuck off into whatever python hole you crawled out of and stay there.

Person: "Why do you run your own server? why not rent a VPS instead of investing 1500 euros in your own server?"
Me: "Do you know how asspensive a VPS with 3TB of storage, 32GB of RAM and 16threads is? You gonna pay that for me?"

!Dev

Can't stand it when you excitedly mention the Mars rover (or anything space related) to someone and they say "Yeah but what's the point you could be feeding the poor or sorting out the environment with that money instead"

...yeah, you could. Or you could be doing that with money from the army instead. Or football. Or any other popular sport. Or yaknow, you could personally be doing that rather than spending all your salary on crappy clothes you're going to throw away in a few months anyway.

And that's not even mentioning the jobs it creates, the people it inspires to go into science + tech fields, the scientific advances it makes for humanity, etc. If you're that against scientific advancement then please, by all means surrender your possessions and just go live in a cave somewhere.

For those of you tired of boring old div soup, one of my classmates has some new and innovative span soup for you to try!

AAARGH ELECTRON IS SO FUCKING...decently pleasant to use?

So I've been working on a FPGA based synthesizer on a Xilinx Arty A7 board (that little Artix 35T chip is surprisingly capable), and since I hate typing commands into a serial stream for anything even decently complex just like any sane person should, I needed something to build a UI for controlling it and other synth projects while I make the Eurorack compatible enclosure and knobs and stuff. I chose Electron because they said it was simple and easy to make cool looking stuff, fast.

And they were right. In like two hours, with Electron and p5.js, starting from zero since I don't know jack about frontend, I had a pretty nice UI driving the hardware synth and effects modules. Not bad. I should use this more often.

!rant, a success story.

I made a tool for a live streamer I like, for free. Something to find highlights in a VOD based on the chatlog.

It took me around 15h to make. It is a very simple electron app, the "valuable" code is ~70 lines.
I wasn't sure he would even bother to try it.

Anyways, I send it to him. 10 minutes later, the guy tells me that "this is amazing! You just saved me hours of derushing my streams ❤️"

That's great already, but it does not end there. A few minutes later he asks me "I know other streamers that would love it, can I share? And can I add you in our private discord?"

I have now a direct access to some of the best youtubers/streamers in my country 🤩.

So I thought “wow, alcohol aerosol should probably catch fire and burn really quick. I bet I can burn my hands if I do this”.

So I poured pure alcohol into a spray bottle and sprayed it right onto a lit up lighter in my hand.

It burned really quick.

I burned my hands.

I was right.

Affective disorder be like

iPhone > Settings > [bluetooth-speaker] > Device Type > “Speaker”

Why?

Because “Specifying the type of device can ensure your Headphone Audio Level measurements are accurate.”

Alright, fair enough.

But, BUT!

Headphone Safety doesn’t fucking care for the chosen device type. It still reduces the sound if turned ON.

It’s good that I can have accurate measurements but what the fuck is this bullshit?!

To iPhone,

If you can accurately measure the audio by respecting the device types, why the fuck can Headphone Safety not respect the same types? Why the fuck does it have to treat every bluetooth device as a headphone?

Is this actual bullshit or am I missing something?

During the last couple of days, I got to hear quite a horrible story...

So we start at the beginning, where I have a dev-related chat with some other strangers on the internet. One of them was working on a custom protocol implementation with an API to go with it, written in Python. There were plans to migrate the codebase to another language like Rust in the long term. So the project seemed to be going well.

Another guy and the main subject of this chimed in on various of our messages, and long story short - he uses Express.js for everything he does, and he doesn't know jack shit on what he's talking about. Yet he still does.

Later we got the delight to hear that he had beaten up his mother, and that she's now in the hospital because of it, with broken arms, hands, fingers and severe bleeding. Yet he has the audacity to complain about his sore throat, caused by all his shouting. He refuses to seek any help, or to take medicines he's been given. This has been going on for several days now.

As much as I hate to even think about it, these too are "developers". I too have skeletons in my closet, but goddamn.. that these people even exist. The very idea that you may be talking to them every day. It disgusts me.

Sit for hours to figure out obscure bug - oh yes, definitely.
Sir for an hour to do some basic tenth class math - oh my god, this is sooooo hard

fuck me

After 1 year decided to install Nextcloud on my Digital Ocean droplet under a subdomain. I'm happy with the results, and now I'm moving my Google Drive data (including contacts) to my Nextcloud instance.

Wish there is a Google Docs equivalent for Nextcloud I could install!.

I'm studying the chance to offer cloud space to my family for free too.

404 bRiStLeS nOt fOuNd

So today I had a discussion with my manager that I have been working unpaid overtime everyday (close to 5 hours overtime). She responds with saying that I am quite young (24) and these are my golden years of learning and I should be working overtime for atleast 10 years of my life during the start of my career to learn stuff because I will regret it later. Idk how am I supposed to react to that. She maybe correct, and I do work overtime sometimes out of my own interest but this is getting way too much and pushing it. any suggestions about how do I deal with such a manager?

New team, same discussions...

* Why should we use cmake? It is way better to add visual studio project files to the repository and allow everyone to mess around in the compiler setting dialogs. Nobody needs cmake if not targeting multiple platforms!
* clang-format? What kind of black magic is this? It is way better to manually try to stick with each source file's existing formatting - regardless of how messed up it is - and manually check that from time to time!
* Why should we use the latest visual studio 2019 compiler, if 2017 and 2015 do just fine? This way we can save license fees!

/irony off

Just to mention a few highlights...

I coded a simple Java programme when I was a beginner, today I reviewing it. I facepalm myself and thinking "I wish I know about 3 tier Architecture software development earlier" . Now I am looking at a one tier Architecture programme.

Which means UI components, Logic Components and Database components are all in ONE class and one method. Omg. Silly past self...

!dev && rant

Looking for a song's lyrics... A very complicated task apparently. Blinding Lights by The Weeknd for whoever's interested.

Firefox: just one small thing to keep going, sorry we just updated our CA certs again. Screw you, close the browser. I will not restart it for you but I will tell you that I would. When you restart the browser, you will lose whatever search you were just doing. Sucks for you bastard! Enjoy the update.

Go to Genius Lyrics, please turn on JavaScript to run this "app". Done that? Okay now solve this CAPTCHA please. Um.. let me just leave that ingenious site.

Next one, AZ Lyrics: Yeah sorry your IP is from a hosting provider, but we will not tell you that is the reason. You've just been denied access to the site. See you next time! Everyone using a VPS to make a VPN connection with is obviously an abuser after all.

Finally found the lyrics on lyrics.com after a long journey that was way more complicated than it should've been. It's a good song.

Oh and Firefox consumed well over a GB for just a single tab of course...
I want Gopher, BBS, IRC and the likes back.

Mention support link support is here! It took me a while but I successfully implemented it and it took way longer than it should’ve.

Kafka lead after a perf test - we have amazing performance, processing 43 records a second😄
Me - WTF!!!! 🤬