I can so relate to this!

Unicode on a cup of joe

and then we have a shitty app 😂

This is how you'd imagine a sysadmin.

(Stolen from Reddit)

That's a scary pumpkin

Ping: 0ms

i started using reddit i few days ago

!r/ProgrammerHumor

It's never a good sign when a team lead writes code like this

Was LibSSH created by noobs? "Let me in bro, the other guy already checked my ID." https://nakedsecurity.sophos.com/20...

No I definitely would not fancy having JavaScript written on me.

About 10 years ago my wife and I were buying a house. We found out late that we needed a lot more cash than we had previously thought we needed, and the deadline to deliver it was just a few days away. After returning home from my full-time gig at about 6pm, I took a break for a bit and then worked all night on a job for a client to make up the extra money. When 7am rolled around I had just finished up. Then I went back to work at my full-time job, and later met with the client to present my work. It was roughly 27 hours at a keyboard for me. That effort made it possible for us to successfully buy our first home. If you want something badly enough, make it happen!

True that~~

Ladies and Gentlemen,

I present you the API I'm working with...

That's a pretty fucking useful error description right there.

Jokes Programmers will understand

*client calls in*

Me: good morning, how can I help you?
Client: my ip is blocked, could you unblock it for me?
Me: certainly! What's your ip address? Then I'll have a look.
Client: I'm not giving you my ip?! That's too privacy sensitive.
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: 😶
Me: sir, I'm very keen on my privacy myself but without that information I can't do much for you 😬
Client: ah so you're refusing to help me?
Me: not like that, it's just very hard to lift an ip block for me when I don't know the ip address.
Client: you just don't want to help, fine.

*click*

😶

„I have secured our mongodb by setting the dbpath deeper than 20 folders by using more than 256 chars. To protect us from windows hacker boys.“

😂

Truth. Gentlemen.

Hey, have you ever wanted to punch a developer 8611 times before?

Never leave your login on a postit

Truth has been spoken!

Screaming at harddrives increases disk latency, as demonstrated in 2008 by a SUN-engineer.

https://web.archive.org/web/...

https://youtu.be/tDacjrSCeq4

Identify yourself. ☕

(Quite possibly a repost, but didn't find through search.)

Diamond:- Am the hardest thing in whole world.💎💎

JavaScript:- ohhhh please!😏😏

!rant

*walks into university library*

*sits down at a computer 😶*

*looks around to see if anyone is looking 🙄*

*takes out laptop*

*unplugs ethernet from school computer and plugs into laptop 😯*

*50MB/s DOWNLOAD SPEEDS 😎😎*

That moment when

*Builds a web component for a client website*

CLIENT: I don't like it, can I have it a tiny bit over to the right more

ME: Taps the arrow key a few times making it look like I'm doing something.(Which actually does nothing)

Client: 👌Perfect

😂😂😂 Wut 😂😂😂

32, 34, 38, 46, 62, 94 and so on.

devRant, the only place developers get excited witnessing a maintenance, downtime.

5.5 hours in... No progress. Have actually gone negative progress...

I imagine two dev colleagues sitting next to each other, on their phone, each feeling very secure in the anonymity of devrant.