so do we have to wait another 20 years for dune part 2 after waiting like a decade extra for dune part 1 ?

Now my worst fear is that I figured out how to implement my idea, because now the only thing stopping me is my laziness.

A big FUCK YOU to all those sites that disable paste on text inputs

Learned bash scripting age 17 for the sole purpose of automatically downloading porn using wget.

Me ( a python dev) pointing to a good java joke in dev rant to my brother who happens to be working at TCS for the past 5 years as a Java Developer...

Me: Java is shit...
He: huh java is the best! every language in the world is written over java. My manager said this.
Me: I think I will kill him today in his sleep.

So, CS student here.
Gave TCS "national" level test.
Quoting from the question:
"if you have 3 bytes of memory, it can be used to represent 2^3=8 values in the memory"

This test is a waste of at least 30000+ human hours and these guys didn't even put 24 hours of effort to make sure questions are correct.
Fuck this fucking IT industry.
Fuck the people who designed this testing process.
Fuck the people who endorsed this process.
Fuck the management for passing it as a test.
The people who wrote the test question can go die in hell.
It's not my problem that their mothers fucked Neanderthals.

Uh! All I want is a job but ended up wasting 200+ hours of time.

"Please disable AdBlock to view the content."

No. I'll just leave. Bye.

Today we interviewed a _very_ good Angular1 Dev, by chance we showed him the forked ngRouter module we use, after some debate he explained that we were using it incorrectly.. I asked if he'd used it before to which he responded:

"Yeah, I'm the guy who built it"

😅

*Now that's what I call a Hacker*

MOTHER OF ALL AUTOMATIONS

This seems a long post. but you will definitely +1 the post after reading this.

xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.

xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"

xxx: You're gonna love this

xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login.

xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".

xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am.

xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fuckingcoffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens an SSH session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has SSHD up and running) and sends some weird gibberish to it. Looks binary. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk.

xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those

Credit: http://bit.ly/1jcTuTT

The bash scripts weren't bogus, you can find his scripts on the this github URL:
https://github.com/narkoz/...

Coding style influence:

Me: Did it work?

-looks like it worked-

Me: THIS IS THE WAY!

Someone else: Yeah but that -

Me: THIS IS THE WAY!

Google should not have this much control over the damn browser market. I wish Mozilla were more powerful.

Seniors: Welcome to the team. Feel free to ask anything if you need help. There is no such thing as stupid questions.

New Dev: Sure. Thanks.

*a few minutes later*

New Dev: How to comment a code?

Seniors: Google it....and please don't ask stupid questions.

I think my most favorite part of programming is when I just try something out and it actually works despite really just guessing.

I work for my highschool's IT department (the money I earn goes directly towards my tuition), here is a picture of my workstation. It's a Lenovo ThinkCentre, it has an Intel i5-6500 vPro, 4GB of RAM and runs Debian 9.4.

!Rant

Anyone else feel the need for 5 more seasons of IT Crowd?

when i worked in IT, some coworkers told me to install some stuff in the "happy" and delete some files from the "surprised". I spend several days confused, until they explained me... Idk if they are idiots or geniuses.

happy disk (C:)
surprised disk (D:)

maybe they were both.

Wife : Lets try some other position tonight.

IT support guy : raise a ticket for change request

Type it in, type it in, type a bigger number in. Oh how fun it is to break other people's software!

Any IT crowd fans here? I know it's an old show but it is Awesome!

kinda bored of javascript, anyone wanna do cocaine with me?

Students in my CS class be like: "This sucks"
Me: "y tho?"
Them: "Idk man, we thought we'd learn cool hacking stuff here instead of java and shit"

CESSPOOL OF FUCKING DEGENERATES CAN YOU NOT READ

one of the many downsides to developing alone, you are basically stuck waiting for an answer on forums/discord/etc..

Fastest way to make visitors leave your website forever:

Look at this guy. He can barely talk but already be messing with some tech stuff.

I remember myself from the age of five. I remember two things: how they asked me how old I was and I looked at my hand showing all five fingers and that I always knew I’ll be doing something tech when I grow up.

> Manager: Why does service X behaves Y way? It should do Z instead.
> Me: *explains why*
> Manager: I don't understand this...
> Me: *explains it in more simple terms and shorter sentences*
> Manager: I'm still not sure I get it.
> Me: It is like this because of a third party provider and we can't change anything for the same reason. Also it is working like this for half a decade now.
> Manager: Ok, I get it. So please fix the service, it should do Z instead of Y.
> Me: *facepalm* Sorry, I can't. Ask (frontend guy), maybe he can help you.
> Frontend guy a bit later: ┌П┐(ಠ_ಠ)

My country's "track" and trace system.

... A fucking joke, especially when you consider the fact it uses Excel as the FUCKING Database!

To whoever is spending their entire botnet on ddosing my project: its working, you successfully took down a 25 line api running on a free heroku dyno, you can stop now.

*on call*
hr: hello , are you looking for a job change.
me : yes
hr: ok congo we have one opening for full stack developer
me : ok whats a jd?
hr : do you know reactjs?
me : yes
hr : do you know nodejs?
me : yes
hr : do you know bootstrap, jquery, photoshop, blender?
me : wait is it job for developer or graphic designer
hr : some time we give little task to our developer about editing photo and video
me : hmm intresting, I never tried blender but I can try if necessary. photoshop and other are ok for me
hr: that's great, we are looking for few more skills
me : ok
hr: . net and django

I started laughing😂😂😂😂

hr: what happened?
me: thank you for entertained me today, day was really rough.

So I got a new job,

Internships on Internshala, a popular Internship recruitment platform in India, be like...

😂😂😂

And the pay: 10,000 INR ~ 136 USD/month

Yep
You read that right
PER MONTH