y'know, preparing for a colleague's vacation is a lot like QA testing. you prepare for all likely scenarios, but the moment they're out the door that exception with 0.0001% likeliness of occurring comes to bite you in the ass

!dev

lol I keep getting in trouble over people taking secondhand-offense, and managers keep bringing up the same instances like I’m somehow at fault.

Look, if Alice says something to Bob, and Carol hears it and gets offended on Bob’s behalf, but Bob doesn’t? Carol should jump off a bridge.

When I was a junior engineer I used to hate writing unit tests but now I look forward to writing them.

Well written Unit tests will save your life

I started my first job in programming on Tuesday. I made a VPC using CDK in Typescript. Today, I deployed to production for the first time. Never felt so proud of myself. 😊

The continued existence of Safari web browser is unacceptable.

devrant needs DRAFT.

I left so many rants unposted because I felt stupid or cringy AF after writing it.

I've handed my resignation and given notice 45 days ago, and my boss still doesn't believe me. It will be quite interesting to see how he reacts on my last day.

Incompetence of people around me drives me mad. I see a piece of shit code and I can’t stop myself from improving it.
Also better developers around me. I need to find out how they’re better and beat them

Wordpress: add content beneath the loop on category/archive pages. WHY IS THIS NOT JUST A PART OF ALL THEMES AT THIS POINT???

Today, I started a new project with Rails. I used always an own auth implementation, now I thought I'll give devise a try. Hell... the documentation is bad, really really bad. I really don't know why people are using this and don't write this by themselves. Anyway, I kicked devise and write it again by myself.

!rant
It‘s just amazing how much a proper type system and a modern language makes refactoring a good dev experience.

Recently applied at a local company. Webform, "enter some details and we'll get back to you"-like.

Entered my details, hit submit, lo and behold "Error 503 - something went wrong on our end".

I was just baffled. It's a well-established IT company and they can't even get their application form to work?

So I'm sitting there in the debugger console, monitoring network stuff to see if anything is weird. I obviously hit submit some several more times during that.

Eventually I give up.

In the night my phone wakes me up with a shitton of "we've received your application and will review it..." emails.

Yeah they didn't get back to me.

At my boss's funeral kneeling and whispering at the coffin

"Who's thinking outside the box now?"

I worked someplace once that fired a person for lack of quality output. Before that he sued the company over a labor dispute. After they fired him he went and founded his own business. A year later the company decided to recycle his old laptop to another developer and discovered the source code and business prospectus on it. The company took it to court and said it was actually their business because it was created on its own equipment and the time stamps confirm during business hours also. Courts agreed and they got possession of his business and then fired him again.

Got an email from a stakeholder about a $0 transaction for an item that was not meant to be $0. Found someone put a condition in the code to set the price to $0 if it couldn’t be queried from the database. Wut…that is…not logical 😵‍💫😵

Just go access to GitHub Copilot! Woohoo!

But dang it's sometimes scary. It's like it can read your mind and knows what to write before you even know it.

The future looks spicy

I think I used to rage more at complete idiots when I was younger because I had the time and energy to do so

Now I've seen it at least a million times and just don't give a shit anymore

Woooow you can like posts on the app by double clicking, My life has changed

You cant write that you have used Linux on your CV just because you are using WSL

Yup ... That's true

My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children.
If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

Supervisor: YOU NEED TO INCREASE THE COVERAGE OF YOUR UNIT TESTS! THE FILE logger.js DOESN'T HAVE >80% COVERAGE! IMAGINE PICKING THIS UP 6 MONTHS FROM NOW!

Bro. It's a Winston instance.
I am literally exporting a fucking Winston instance with 0 custom logic.
If 6 months from now I take a file and can't understand a Winston instance anymore, you're well within your right to fire me on the spot.

I finally get it. Symfony: The Fast Track (https://symfony.com/doc/6.0/...) is not supposed to be a learning tool.

It's an elaborate joke! Now it all makes sense.

My son has started learning javascript at school, but he is complaining that all the $ signs are ugly! Yep, they're teaching the kids with jquery.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry 😱😱😱

Java is like Alzheimer's, it starts off slow, but eventually, your memory is gone.

Client: When will you give me an update on this feature

Me: In two weeks

Client: okay that’s fine

Client proceeds to call me everyday asking me for an update🤨🤨

Fuck you sir.

Showed this error to my other half and was told "sounds like a regular Saturday night then"

This happened today...
Manager: how long this is going to take?
Dev: 3 months
M: cool! 3 weeks then
D: no.. This is quite complicated and most of us are unfamiliar with the topics. It'll take us 2 weeks just to get started
M: drop the unit tests then. Just get the features done in 3 weeks. We have customers waiting
D: that's a bad idea. We'll end up with unstable co..
M: oh we also need to complete documentation, release guide, and this [shitty feature no one care about]
D: but that is even more complex. We don't have enough ti..
M: just copy it from stackoverflow. It'll only take 5 minutes guys

Worst part? This guy is technically sound and understands our pain really well. He is just acting dumb and trying to put the blame on us when the higher management asks

Second worst part? The whole team keeps silent when I try to convince him somehow and starts ranting after he leaves the call

Python be like:
TypeError: 'callable_iterator' object is not callable
and also:
TypeError 'callable_iterator' object is not subscriptable

Why the fuck did you name it "callable iterator" if you can't call it, or iterate it.

It is the year 2022.
We have multiple robots on Mars.
We have mRNA vaccines.

JIRA does not yet have a dark mode.