!dev

Don't drink 2 espressos as breakfast and go on a one-hour toiletless train ride.

60 minutes is a long time to frantically debate with yourself what would look weirder: Shitting in your laptop bag, or pressing your butt against the small sliding window.

Sometimes I just randomly start installing a new vps, configure the server, put a random sub domain on it, forward nginx with SSL, print something random on the page and then just remove the thing again.

Solely because I enjoy installing servers/configuring them.

Am I weird? 😅

When you are pissed AF but somehow it manages to get through

And it works!😊😊

Why study computer science if you can become a science and get paid for it? 🤣

$19billion later, here we are

Rockstar dev🤘🏻

Me: *uses HashMap* for a problem to count some elements*

Lecturer: why are you using HashMap?

Me: it's the best way of solving the problem

Lecturer: I haven't explicitly taught you what a HashMap is so why are you using it?

Me: Because I learn outside of what university teaches me

Lecturer: there's another way to do this

Me: enlighten me

Lecturer: iterate through the array using a nested for loop and count as you go along

Me: why the hell would I want to do that? That literally decreases the efficiency of my program by alot

GG lecturer telling me it's a better idea of making my O(n) runtime into an O(n^2) instead of complimenting my code.

Seriously what the fuck is up with the fucking education system. Since when was it okay to teach students how to completely fuck your code up and promote ways of making your code so inefficient?

That's fair.

Types of headache 😂

"hey there is this bug, could you fix it?"
me: sure whats the bug?
*explains the bug*

me:... thats.... thats your feature request from last week

Recruiter: And I found your devRant account, it’s @brod right? very interesting stuff.
Me: ...

Halloween joke, anyone?

"If you want a slutty costume for Halloween, you should go as my professor. He barely covers anything important" 😁

Was originally hired for 3 months.

Just finished the project 2 weeks ago, after 1.5 years.

I fucking hate data science now.

1969 vs 2017

So I wanted to send an email to Microsoft to request a feature in their new "To-Do" app.

I went to the play store and scrolled down to the end where it says "Send an email to developer".

Clicked on that. And here is the email address:

"noreply@microsoft.com"

😑 😑

Happy Halloween!

My company is like:

Boss: How long do you estimate to make a universe?
God: 14 billion years.
Boss: You have 7 days. Please reserve 1 for Q&A.

Our programming teacher had a surgery on his left eye and will not be able to do the lessons with us. Guess what the subject of the email he sent us was.

"I can't C#."
He made a pun about his fucking health status, alright then.

Best joke I have read this week...

Thank you @dfox

Glad I could help with the .com domain!

Another dev on my team just got a new machine. Before he came in today I made two separate USB installers and left him these notes.

So, someone submitted a 'bug' to Mozilla.

As some of you may know, in the next year, the new mass surveillance law in the Netherlands is going into effect.

Another fun fact is that the dutch security agencies/government have their own CA (Certificate Authority) for SSL/TLS certificates.

The new law says that the AIVD (dutch NSA/GCHQ equivilant) is allowed to hack into systems through obtained certificates and also that they're allowed to INTERCEPT TRAFFIC THROUGH OBTAINED PRIVATE SSL/TLS KEYS.

So someone actually had the fucking balls to submit a fucking issue to Mozilla saying that the Dutch State certs shouldn't be accepted anymore when the new mass surveillance law gets into place.

This person deservers a fucking medal if you ask me.

As much as i love Ubuntu... This is so true.

StackOverflow, I use it so much it's practically a tool at this point.

When you're a geek and u love Memes

we fell in love because both of us prefer tabs over spaces

Boss : Change the website to look more professional.

Me : Change comes from within.

*fired*

My conversation with my wife today, while I was at work:

Wife: The wifi isn't working.
Me: What's it doing?
W: Not working
Me: Try turning it off an on again.
.
.
.
Me: Is your phone on LTE? Or is it connected to wifi and the internet isn't working?
W: LTE. Aubrey (my wife's sister) said she turned it off and nothing happened.
Me: did she turn it back on?
W: Do you really want me to answer that?
Me: Just making sure. What lights are on on the router?
W: (Sends me a picture of the router with no lights on)
Me:...
W: Oh it isn't even plugged in
Me:...
W (after a couple minutes): Its working now!

YES I REALLY WANT YOU TO ANSWER IF YOU TURNED IT BACK ON!

The post button should say "Commit"