Github stats:

coworker 1: 3,535k ++ 987k --
coworker 2: 1,563k ++ 735k --
etc.
me: 453k ++ 7,848k --

I guess this confirms my job at the company as "Backend Crap Remover".

Lets all help them share their startup

Colleague: As asap as possible!
Me: ಠ_ಠ

This guy at my last internship. A windows fanboy to the fucking max!

He was saying how he'd never use anything related to Linus Torvalds because he hated him for creating Linux.

Two seconds later I saw him initializing a new git repo.

I was standing there like:

*should I tell him?*

😅😆

I miss my old ZenBook with Linux 😔

I mean, the MacBook is great, but it feels like I left my old simple gf who loved me for a Hollywood sexy bitch who doesn't give a fuck

When I was a kid, I used Dreamweaver and my mother would watch me doing things and she used to say "Oh, my dear there are lots of icons and buttons!!! How do you manage that? How do you know which one is for what purpose? You are really brilliant."

And now I use Atom IDE and she says "This looks very easy. Technology has evolved so much that you don't have to click so many buttons and just write simple lines, just as simple as writing letters and the software does the rest of the things. These softwares have done a brilliant job."

Seriously the technology has changed (and my mother too) !!!

I like my humour how I like my UI.

DARK.

This is like..... Spot on. 😂

Boss emailed me that I need to work again on Saturday and Sunday.
I replied with a resignation letter.

How Programmers review code

Code: if(customer.primaryContract)

Boss: "just using a variable as a boolean isn't very readable"

Me:
if(!(!customer.primaryContract != !true).toString() == 'false')

Product dev: We need a new volume slider for ou...

Dev: Say no more!

Website design philosophies:

Apple: "...and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and a really big picture there, and..."

Microsoft: "border-radius:0 !important;"

Google: "EVERYTHING MOVES!!! And most websites get material design. Most."

Amazon: "We're slowly moving away from 2009"

Wix: "How can we further increase load times?"

Literally any download site: "Click here! No, click here! Nononono!! Click here!!..."

Facebook: "We can't change anything because our main age demographic is around 55"

University websites: "That information isn't hard enough to find yet. Decrease the search accuracy and increase broken links."

Officially graduated with a bachelors in computer science.

YYEEESSS!!!!

"Are you familiar with uploading your code to Google Drive?"

I left the building at that exact moment.

Let's clarify:
* Github is not Git
* Android is not Java
* Unit test is not TDD
* Java is not OOP
* Docker is not Devops
* Jenkins is not CI
* Agile is not institutionalised total chaos
* Developer is not Printer Support

Good Innovation !!

Wife: what are you thinking about?

Me: how to optimize key storage in a binary tree

Wife: forget that I asked

try {
♥️
}
catch(e) {
🍺
}

#happyvalentinesday

And then there is this beauty...

What only relying on JavaScript for HTML form input validation looks like

The best answer

How to break a chatbot (well done).

the beauty of learning to code.. wait, what's that say again?

Finally got the last of the hardware pieces for my pi book pro in today. Figured out how I'm going to lay it out and now to make custom cables to connect it all :D This old MacBook may yet breathe new life!

Some devs want to see the world burn

Thanks @dfox for adding the double tap to upvote feature, I mean, bug. You're a saint

So glad you are here guys :')

GIT Cheat Sheet