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Search - "goddamnit!"
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MOTHERFUCKING WINDOWS 10. YOU COCKROACH COCK SUCKING PIECE OF AQUAMAN'S LEFT NUT.
If I put you in hibernation I do NOT want you to WAKE THE FUCK UP WHEN ITS AROUND THAT TIME A NIGHT WHEN TEEN WOLF IS SPREADING HIS STD'S TO DIAMOND-SKINNED DOUCHEBAGS. (Middle of the night)
AND WAKE ME BECAUSE OF YOUR SOUND AND LIGHT.
Goddamnit how hard is it to let a computer hibernate, but no, they had to add shit functions that makes it update itself or something in the middle of the night.
I'm going to tear the functions out of your retro ass till you will fucking obey my every command. You will fucking hibernate when I say so till when I say so or I'll replace you with linux17 -
> me on call
> had to much wine
> suddenly, phone starts making sound
> holy shit, I am on call and I am not supposed to drink
> Calls taxi because shit is looking bad at work. Everything look down according to the sms I get, I had to pay the taxi from my own pocket.
> 40 min later, arrive at work. Walk into the serverroom.
> Go to the the server that is monitoring everything.
> Check networkcable, it is loose. Push it a little.
> Goddamnit, that was it.
> Realize I never doublechecked if stuff really was down from home....5 -
Stop reading articles on which framework/library is better, pick one and start actually writing code.
... Only to then discover that this library is utterly broken and/or undocumented and you have to start over again.
GODDAMNIT JS I HATE YOUR ASS7 -
!dev, sort of
Days like today make me not ready for Monday. Goddamnit nature, why you gotta be so pristine?12 -
YOU STUPID APPLICATION MANAGER STOP PROLONGING THIS MEETING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD this is a daily scrum not a status report you solid twat stop asking when something will be done when it hasn't even been worked on yet
Dev: "I'll start working on the thing today, might take a day or two to finish development"
Twat: "Will it be ready for testing tmorrow"
D: "Maybe by late tomorrow? If all goes well"
T: "So it'll be tested by tomorrow"
D: "Uhhhh wait"
T: "It'll be done by tomorrow"
D: "But"
GODDAMNIT MAN HE'LL TELL YOU TOMORROW IF IT'S DONE OR NOT AND IF IT CAN BE TESTED I want to punch you so hard in the face with a spiked mallet covered in wasp stingers and hello kitty juice to excacerbate your diabetes you filthy piece of excrement waiting to be smeared across the pavement with my boot9 -
Godmotherfuckingshitpissballs fuck software development. Seriously wtf.
I learned c# and Unity for 4 fuckin years. Now I want to learn Electron and i just cant get it to fuckin work that motherfucker!
Installed node.js into a folder on my Desktop, git cloned the quick start app, copied the files, npm start and wow it starts.
ONCE.
It does not start anymore wtf? Also the stupid tutorials that I bought dont fuckin explain how to set it up properly wtf...
Doesnt help that im a windows noob and the guy in the tutorial is a macSnob.
Goddamnit I hate this phase of learning stuff. It fuckin sucks.
Also software development is around for like what? 30 years and electron is the best solution for GUI that people came up with? Fuck me.30 -
"Great news everybody, in light of the pandemic, CoolCorp will be switching to an Unlimited Vacation policy! We hope everyone takes advantage of this new employee-friendly perk, but yes, you still need manager approval and you need to make sure your work is covered while you're gone, enjoy!"
I had 5 WEEKS of PTO, and used to bank (and get paid out for) about 4 of those weeks every year. Goddamnit, what a scam6 -
mom : i don't understand why my son became a nocturnal being..
father : son .. what the hell do you do entire night alone in your room with your lappy .. go get a gf or get married .. go get a life
relatives : beta (son in indian lang) my tv is not working can you fix it.. beta my internet is not working on my mobile (goddamnit turn on the mobile data for fuck sake )1 -
Goddamnit, why have I started playing Factorio? I knew the game was gonna be addicting as hell, and yet here I am :(4
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Saturday night coding to make a deadline for a Wordpress website that needs to launch on monday...
I hate Wordpress!!!! Did I ever mention it?
Ok, now back to work!7 -
(long post is long)
This one is for the .net folks. After evaluating the technology top to bottom and even reimplementing several examples I commonly use for smoke testing new technology, I'm just going to call it:
Blazor is the next Silverlight.
It's just beyond the pale in terms of being architecturally flawed, and yet they're rushing it out as hard as possible to coincide with the .Net 5 rebranding silo extravaganza. We are officially entering round 3 of "sacrifice .Net on the altar of enterprise comfort." Get excited.
Since we've arrived here, I can only assume the Asp.net Ajax fiasco is far enough in the past that a new generation of devs doesn't recall its inherent catastrophic weaknesses. The architecture was this:
1. Create a component as a "WebUserControl"
2. Any time a bound DOM operation occurs from user interaction, send a payload back to the server
3. The server runs the code to process the event; it spits back more HTML
Some client-side js then dutifully updates the UI by unceremoniously stuffing the markup into an element's innerHTML property like so much sausage.
If you understand that, you've adequately understood how Blazor works. There's some optimization like signalR WebSockets for update streaming (the first and only time most blazor devs will ever use WebSockets, I even see developers claiming that they're "using SignalR, Idserver4, gRPC, etc." because the template seeds it for them. The hubris.), but that's the gist. The astute viewer will have noticed a few things here, including the disconnect between repaints, inability to blend update operations and transitions, and the potential for absolutely obliterative, connection-volatile, abusive transactional logic flying back and forth to the server. It's the bring out your dead approach to seeing how much of your IT budget is dedicated to paying for bandwidth and CPU time.
Blazor goes a step further in the server-side render scenario and sends every DOM event it binds to the server for processing. These include millisecond-scale events like scroll, which, at least according to GitHub issues, devs are quickly realizing requires debouncing, though they aren't quite sure how to accomplish that. Since this immediately becomes an issue with tickets saying things like, "scroll event crater server, Ugg need help! You said Blazorclub good. Ugg believe, Ugg wants reparations!" the team chooses a great answer to many problems for the wrong reasons:
gRPC
For those who aren't familiar, gRPC has a substantial amount of compression primarily courtesy of a rather excellent binary format developed by Google. Who needs the Quickie Mart, or indeed a sound markup delivery and view strategy when you can compress the shit out of the payload and ignore the problem. (Shhh, I hear you back there, no spoilers. What will happen when even that compression ceases to cut it, indeed). One might look at all this inductive-reasoning-as-development and ask themselves, "butwai?!" The reason is that the server-side story is just a way to buy time to flesh out the even more fundamentally broken browser-side story. To explain that, we need a little perspective.
The relationship between Microsoft and it's enterprise customers is your typical mutually abusive co-dependent relationship. Microsoft goes through phases of tacit disinterest, where it virtually ignores them. And rightly so, the enterprise customers tend to be weaksauce, mono-platform, mono-language types who come to work, collect a paycheck, and go home. They want to suckle on the teat of the vendor that enables them to get a plug and play experience for delivering their internal systems.
And that's fine. But it's also dull; it's the spouse that lets themselves go, it's the girlfriend in the distracted boyfriend meme. Those aren't the people who keep your platform relevant and competitive. For Microsoft, that crowd has always been the exploratory end of the developer community: alt.net, and more recently, the dotnet core community (StackOverflow 2020's most loved platform, for the haters). Alt.net seeded every competitive advantage the dotnet ecosystem has, and dotnet core capitalized on. Like DI? You're welcome. Are you enjoying MVC? Your gratitude is understood. Cool serializers, gRPC/protobuff, 1st class APIs, metadata-driven clients, code generation, micro ORMs, etc., etc., et al. Dear enterpriseur, you are fucking welcome.
Anyways, b2blazor. So, the front end (Blazor WebAssembly) story begins with the average enterprise FOMO. When enterprises get FOMO, they start to Karen/Kevin super hard, slinging around money, privilege, premiere support tickets, etc. until Microsoft, the distracted boyfriend, eventually turns back and says, "sorry babe, wut was that?" You know, shit like managers unironically looking at cloud reps and demanding to know if "you can handle our load!" Meanwhile, any actual engineer hides under the table facepalming and trying not to die from embarrassment.36 -
I have such little patience for the whole fucking “let’s just do it later” mentality anymore. Especially when it takes like 30 minutes or less to fix. Then a month goes by and everyone suffers from it not being fixed. Like I understand why they do so and why it’s important to just do the task. I understand there’s often no time to make huge improvements, but if you have time and you see a small thing that can be fixed, make improvements you silly little bump-on-a-log. Like have a little empathy for your comrades goddamnit.8
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The problem with being a designer and a programmer is that Photoshop and Illustrator is on Windows and I code on Ubuntu.
You have to restart and boot a different OS everytime goddamnit12 -
Goddamnit I am an idiot. I just fried a microcontroller because I didnt have the right power supply and I used it anyway because fuck it, right? So now I am not a single step closer to the thing I was trying to do but I fucked up my hardware and it is a huge pain in the ass until I get a new one and figure out all the problems with it. Arghn7
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GODDAMNIT! I keep on trying to double tap submissions and comments on the Reddit App to upvote them!3
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Ok tomorrow I'm gonna kidnap one dev or two and I'm gonna release them only when I fully fucking understand how to fucking send an image to a private registry goddamnit
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Functional test are failing.
Expected: 7109
Got: 9000
Grep code-base for 7109. No findings. 0_o
Dig through test setup written by a drunk.
Find:
assert(actualPrice === 1800 * conversionRate)
Goddamnit. You shall not calculate your expected values in a test setup.1 -
Some of yall really need to learn git and learn how to communicate with other people and fucking be considerate human beings who are not fucking all leaches off society but goddamnit we can’t have nice things. All it’s gotta be is ruthless assholes in this industry I’m fucking so done I hate everyone in dev and I want out I FUCKING WANT OUT PLEASE GOD KILL ME7
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Worthless people. Goddamnit I've had enough of this shit. If you're not going to contribute, get the fuck off my team and take a job that's more in line with your qualifications.2
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Just went to my accounts in Google. And happen to go across my activity section. I had no fucking idea I was tracked so much! It even lists the app I have opened at particular time. It stores every frigging thing I do with my phone. Goddamnit! Yes, I understand I have agreed to share my information with you. But you just take everything.
Go to myaccount.google.com and head towards the my activity section. You'll know what I'm talking about if you are heavy android user.5 -
<rant>
I was once a pure server side developer. Then came full stack development. So in order to keep up with the competition, I had to brave through front-end development.
But goddamn javascript, make up your mind between functions, and “Objects”.
Also variable visibility. Goddamnit. I thought ES6 was widely supported. I was happy doing const and let bbut goddamn testing frameworks, grunt and shit. Can’t make up it’s mind to support it unitedly.
And lastly, IE. Goddamn it, why the fuck are you not supporting Promise by default. We’re fucking 2017. [insert slowpoke meme]
</rant>
One good thing though, I like the library vuejs.
Bad thing is, this is just the beginning of a much more upcoming headache.4 -
I am so sick of this place. Production deployment shouldn't be such a massive cluster fuck of different departments and sometimes redundant configurations. Knowing who to talk to about a problem shouldn't change daily, and it shouldn't be hard to figure out.
My jvm doesn't appear to be running in production. I hunt down the fucker who is supposed to be handling this problem today...but he's out of office and no one knows who his stand in is...GODDAMNIT!2 -
I just hate it when people dont know tools of their profession!
You are a dev..... Learn git goddamnit!
You are a frontend dev.... Know SASS and various other tools that will make your and people around you's life easier.
You are a backend dev.... Know how to use linux and know which tool to use to make the app faster.....
Or else dont talk to me and leave me alone.5 -
My last week of 2017 sucks! The function that been assigned to me has been 7 months until i doing it without any priority tasks. The bad for this, is becoming worse for the clients and they really want it until the end of 2017, so happy new year motherfuckers.
Here's the story, the function i am doing requires a heavy calculations, and i am no brainer in math, though my logical skills, hopes me up to made it quickly as possible. However i am full of workloads/to-do for the past 3 months, that i am unable to comply my documents regarding my employment!!
Much worse for this is the coding guidelines. There no fucking guidelines at all, like do what i want just to make it work, but my team lead ironically speaking that never touch that because it's already working. Dude, the server response was the real issue there and i was supposed to handle that function because your fucking json was not formatted well! Shout out to git for giving me a saving grace not to fire me.
Lastly, the leader's attitude. You're so sarcastic as fuck! Of course i won't get mad at you on personal matters, i understand. But on work, the way you communicate was not like my any mentor/prof that i ever met!! I hate my fucking work. Hope my 2018 would do my best, AND I AM GONNA MAKE MY OWN GUIDELINES ACCORDING TO YOUR ASSES!! HAPPY NEW YEAR, GODDAMNIT!! -
First exam this year, about database optimisation. I have been there just a week and I really enjoy this school
BUT. THIS. CAN'T. BE. TOLERATED.
I wouldn't wish my worst enemy to write SQL on paper goddamnit!!!!
(Yeah I didn't have any other pen that this red one, at least it was erasable)7 -
Forgive me Yukihiro Matsumoto senpai, for I have sinned. I can't manage to pass my notices and my alerts from Ruby on Rails to React, so I have to display them in invisible divs. This is so ugly I threw up in my mouth.
Thank you again StackOverflow for being as useless as usual.2 -
WHO CAN SPOT THIS STUPID PHP ERROR!
$string = "something.com"
if(strpos(".", $string))
echo " yep, there's a period";
else
echo "nope, fuck you there isn't";
output: "nope, fuck you there isn't"
me: wtf ??? fucking wasting my time on this fucking stupid tiny fucking error, goddamnit and each refresh takes 15 seconds because it involves calling all these apis from localhost, gmail, etc. arggg...
...for an hour, until I smacked my head so hard I'm in the hospital for a concussion
I hate when that happens.
Time to take a break.15 -
Goddamnit Linux Whyyyyyyyy? Whyyyyyyy? How many gods do I have to pray to, to make you work on my machine.14
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Spent 1-2h (or it felt like so) fixing this one bug today. I'm still mad about it LoL. I knew exactly what was the problem, just didn't know where it was, and went over that piece of code time and time again and didn't see it... UGH THE FRUSTRATION. When I found the error I wanted to get inside a hole and die of how stupid a mistake it was and how it had been staring at me in the face, mocking me for being so dumb. ARGH!4
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Spent entire fucking day trying to get gradle to download library from internal artifactory because java didnt recognize the ca root cert i placed in java jre cacerts file. Goddamnit
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Checking out tutorials on youtube, getting bombarded with that fucking wix.com advert! Well as a matter of fact, I do need a website! Wich is why I'm on here in the first place! goddamnit! Piss of! #SomeonePleaseShootMe! #putASockInItWix🙈😩😖
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Goddamnit, why did yarn have to replace "yarn install" with "yarn add"? When you're switching between npm and yarn, its a fucking confusing nightmare.1
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Goddamnit, I've been rumaging around a CMS -generated site (not wordpress) for a friend in devtools.(to suggest improvements) I don't have much experience with CMS, but why is there so much fucking useless nested markup everywhere that has to go down the line. A simple paragraph has at least 6x nesting, a nav is "centered" by having a millionenty billionety divs on each side, there was even a span element for a single character inside a <p>.
What a fucking mess.5 -
!dev
Goddamnit first day after vacation my alarm goes off, i turn it off and guess what
Correct i turned my dumb ass the fuck arround again and fell back asleep for another hour.
But it is kinda fine because i could still catch the next train after the one i normally take. -
Took me some days (considering I code every week or so since that when I open the IDE my motivation is nowhere to be seen) to realize that instead of writing "implement" to implement the methods of an interface I was writing "extend". I mentally facepalmed. Why are you so stupid sometimes brain
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Update on this;
https://devrant.com/rants/5967284/...
Since Saturday morning my throat has been feeling like I’ve chugged bleach. My eardrums feel like they’re gonna pop at any moment. I just got home from a doctors appointment. I have fucking covid. I have so little covid specific symptoms that I almost didn’t get tested, doc only tested on a hunch. The only time I’m around people without a mask is at the office so someone at work must have given me the big-sick. If it wasn’t for the vaxx it probably would have been in my lungs by now.
Imagine being such a loser that you get covid this late in the damn game. Goddamnit6 -
Why is iOS debugging so fucking useless? Instead of having a normal stack trace which takes you to the line of code that went wrong it just takes you to the bootstrap line in AppDelegate with a random code and basically says "Fuck you, figure it out yourself". Their stack traces are just as useless. IS THIS WHAT SOME PEOPLE CALL THE PREMIERE DEVELOPMENT EXPERIENCE, GODDAMNIT? at least Swift is nice tho, unlike Objective-C4
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I've been trying to install Manjaro all day and night. I've got the USB, loads up grub and when I press to boot from stick/HDD it boots and it doesn't even show a video source. My monitor says "no source"
But I did manage to get into once and install Manjaro on my actual HDD. The problem is when I boot it from there it does the SAME EXACT THING
What the hell. I've tried Gnome and XFCE with multiple usb booting options to install it on the usb. None of it works. I'm pissed.
Goddamnit -
Why recruiters are sometimes taking so long to answer? I did my final stage of interview with the companie's client (out of 4 stages in total) last Thursday.
Client came back with positive feedback at Monday at the end of workday. Today is Tuesday and internal recruiter was supposed to call me to make an offer and discuss starting date.
Now again workday is nearly over and no contact from her. Tomorrow is a national holiday so she will get back to me at best on Thursday.
Goddamnit why it takes so long, if Im starting next Monday I need to prepare myself. Im seriously getting second thoughts such as even about declining the offer if they will try to lowball me. Previous week they really rushed the process and I had to do 4 stages of interviews and this week they are wasting my time. Am I being impatient or what?2 -
Apple news api - why are you only returning 401s in my c# calls when in my python calls you return a correct response? What small detail am I missing goddamnit!
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Goddamnit ISP's. Yesterday I got transferred to another ISP because of a merger and till this moment I don't have internet, TV or phone (not that I was using the phone line but I am paying for it) and after being on hold for over an hour this morning with customer service I got told it can take them till fuckin monday to get the connection going again.
I'll repeat FUCKIN ISP'S!!!!!