If you are stuck at 5 PM, you won't fix it "in 20 minutes". You will rather spend 2 hours trying to fix it and still be stuck. Go home, relax a little. The next day in the morning you will be unstuck!

Programmer boyfriend: *explaining his work and code and how things work*

PBF: does that make sense?

Me: of course

Narrator: it did not make sense

Did this on my first programming exam.

int index = 0
int value = 0
try {
while true {
value += array[index]
index++
}
} catch NullPointerException {
System.out.print("Sum: " + value)
}

The task was to add together all numbers in an array.

I somehow aced the exam, but got called in to teachers office this is not the way to use exceptions.

My client wants a jpg image with a transparent background !!!!!!!

- What is exactly your job
-- I am a developer
- So, what does it mean exactly?
-- I create software, applications like those you use on your phone and PC
- So you can create phones and PCs?
-- No it is not that :|
- Can you fix my Laptop?
-- here we go

-When using Windows
Butthurt Geeks: "You suck, use Linux!"

-When using Ubuntu
Butthurt Geeks: "You suck, use Arch! (or anything that isn't based in mainstream Ubuntu ) "

-When using Atom
Butthurt Geeks: "You suck, don't use the mouse!"

-When using Vim
Butthurt Geeks: "You suck, use Emacs!"

Really, do you always have to force everyone to use the toys that you are using?

Angry customer (😤): Your software is still too slow!!!
Me (🙄): It's running good all in all. Let's divide this into smaller aspects. Which steps do you need to perform faster?
😤: Every step needs to be as fast as google!
🙄: But our software ain't google, not even to mention your infrastructure
😤: Everything needs to run in 2 seconds!!!
🙄: You aren't helping in any way. We need something to grasp...
😤: It's all your fault.

📴

The story of the $500,000,000 error.

In 1996, an unmanned Ariane 5 model rocket was launched by the European Space Agency.

Onboard was software written to analyze the horizontal velocity of the spacecraft. A conversion between a 64-bit floating point value and a 16-bit signed integer within this software ultimately caused an overflow error just forty seconds after launch, leading to a catastrophic failure of the spacecraft.

That day, $7 billion of development met it's match: a data type conversion.

Yeeeeeeeee! My granddaughter yelled up to me, "Grandpa, I'm programming!" She was doing some kid code game thing. Ten years old. I can hope, can't I? 😁

If I learned something from videogames than this cat have a quest for me.

User: "What should I do? I'm confused."

To all my clients :

THIS AD IS ANNOYING!!! 😬

Guilfoyle - the badass of nerds. I think he speaks for most of us.

Finally ditched Linux and am back on the original and best :p

George R.R. Martin approves Linux as the most friendly OS.

I was bored in class.

Myth debunked. This explains the history of Apple computers.

college is a pyramid scam scheme

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