When your boss asks you to debug some crappy legacy code and you need to bring in the heavy artillery

This is the snackbar at my university's computer science building

It feels stupid to see a simple google dork returning the list of your mistakes.

Jesus, Apple are fucking amazing at design! A keyboard I need to prop up with a book and a mouse I can't use when charging.... Genius!!!!

Never ask a woman about their age.

Never ask a man about their wage.

Never ask a dev about their bugs.

</sarcasm>

Without words.

Swedish privacy!

The creation of an e-ink usb stick showing how much space is in use was to this day one of the best things lexar ever did.

He's got a valid point

Colleague: "Python is slow..too much slow."

Then I look at the code:

Eight nested for loops, inside two of them, two function calls and three list comprehension. That function has 2 nested loops and two "objects.all()" Django method, plus a list comprehension too..

Yep, Python is slow.

So I wrote a code in HTML and js that puts an alert on the screen that says "all of your info is mine now, goodbye" and then redirects you to the nyam cat site

I sent it to some of my friends to have a little laugh but they have sent it to other people and eventually the school principle called me and told me to go to her office and retrieve all the data I stole

I went there and explaind her the prank but she didn't believe me
So she called the programming teacher to check the file
She laughed as hard as I've ever seen anyone laughing and told me to go back to class

It was scary and funny but the thing I've learnt is that it's stupid to prank ignorant people.

"Linux is only free if your time has no value." - Jamie Zawinski

I worked with a good dev at one of my previous jobs, but one of his faults was that he was a bit scattered and would sometimes forget things.

The story goes that one day we had this massive bug on our web app and we had a large portion of our dev team trying to figure it out. We thought we narrowed down the issue to a very specific part of the code, but something weird happened. No matter how often we looked at the piece of code where we all knew the problem had to be, no one could see any problem with it. And there want anything close to explaining how we could be seeing the issue we were in production.

We spent hours going through this. It was driving everyone crazy. All of a sudden, my co-worker (one referenced above) gasps “oh shit.” And we’re all like, what’s up? He proceeds to tell us that he thinks he might have been testing a line of code on one of our prod servers and left it in there by accident and never committed it into the actual codebase. Just to explain this - we had a great deploy process at this company but every so often a dev would need to test something quickly on a prod machine so we’d allow it as long as they did it and removed it quickly. It was meant for being for a select few tasks that required a prod server and was just going to be a single line to test something. Bad practice, but was fine because everyone had been extremely careful with it.

Until this guy came along. After he said he thought he might have left a line change in the code on a prod server, we had to manually go in to 12 web servers and check. Eventually, we found the one that had the change and finally, the issue at hand made sense. We never thought for a second that the committed code in the git repo that we were looking at would be inaccurate.

Needless to say, he was never allowed to touch code on a prod server ever again.

Story of my life

IT can be such a thankless job.

"warranty void if seal is broken"
Me: "seal isn't broken"

Dutch people must be having hard time programming

Hahaha

lol 😂😂😂