"Oh no this platform is serverless"

I hate this "serverless" term.

How does a cloud platform run serverless?

HOW?!

"yeah but like we don't have to run updates and manage the underlying stuff and can thus deploy stuff serverless"

NO.

THERE ARE ACTUAL SERVERS RUNNING IN ORDER TO RUN THIS PLATFORM.

YOU CANT RUN THIS FUCKING PLATFORM WITHOUT ACTUAL SERVERS.

HOW WOULD IT RUN THEN, ON FUCKING STARDUST?!

IT. IS. NOT. SERVERLESS. AS. LONG. AS. SERVERS. ARE. INVOLVED. AT. SOME. LEVEL.

Had my first 'mentor' moment at work today!

Newest guy couldn't figure something out and asked me, slightly nervously, for help.

Suddenly I went into mentorish state, explaining stuff I was doing while fixing it in under a minute!

Felt good 😃

I fucking hate people who tell me what i should do when they obviously dont know a fucking inch of anything related to the dev world fucking idiots ruining my day with fucking retarded orders.

I AM THE DEV UR THE FUCKING MANAGER STAY AT UR FUCKING PLACE

> finds awesome software
> finishes trial period
> looks at pricing
> looks at bank account
> cries in a corner

Laptop runs out of energy and shuts down, but thank goodness I was warned 2 seconds before that the energy level is low.

Appearently you can entertain a little girl for ages by letting her type glibberish on a laptop and letting her hear the resulting speach synthesysis.

I would be SO pissed.

Compilation completed. Output file size: 15KB
*Adds a JSON library*
Compilation completed. Output file size: 1.4MB

SON OF A BITCH

Interviewing a junior dev.
> Make this function return false.
> junior: deleted all code in function replaces it with return false;

Literally no words.........

Me: I have admin rights
Windows: Looks legit
Me: can I delete this folder ?
Windows: Nope

My wife: “Commit, then come to bed.”

As a Dev,
I hate writing Docs.

As a Dev,
I hate it when there's no Docs.

Vicious Cycle.

Boss: “Do you think you can work on Saturday? We really need the help.”

Me: “Yes, of course.”

Boss: “Great, thank you.”

Me: “I’ll probably be late, though, as public transport is slow on the weekends.”

Boss: “Okay, when do you think you will be at the office?”

Me: “Monday”.

This guy at my last internship. A windows fanboy to the fucking max!

He was saying how he'd never use anything related to Linus Torvalds because he hated him for creating Linux.

Two seconds later I saw him initializing a new git repo.

I was standing there like:

*should I tell him?*

😅😆

I recently met a young fella (14yo) playing League of Legends. He asked:
- What do you do for a living?
- I'm a programmer, do you know anything about programming?
- I don't, actually.

Apparently he was playing from a LAN Gaming center 'cause he didn't have a computer at home (his computer had broken and these Lan centers are pretty affordable).
I figured I could explain to him what was it and what super powers you could get from it. Turns out I recommended a JS course in codecademy and now he goes to the LAN center every day to study programming (he got really into it!).
Now he always pings me with questions about JS and apparently he's learning a ton! He had almost no English skills too (we're Brazilian), and because most of the material in the internet is in English he found himself some free English courses and he's now taking them!

Knowledge is free on the internet and I guess he's just realized that.

Not exactly a rant guys, just figured it was a nice story to tell :)
#TeachAKidHowToCode

- Knock, knock

- An async function

- Who's there?

USB sounds like a backup in case the USA fails

Dear DEVS,

chmod -R 777 /

is not the right way to fix your application permissions issues!!!!!!

Yours truly,
sys ad who is not fixing your production server.

Just got my first RedBubble shirt 😍

I am feeling nerdier than ever.

Today is:
- PI day
- Einstein birthday
- Stephen Hawking died today
- My birthday

"Hi, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."
"Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"
"Yes, I'd like to hear a TCP joke."
"OK, I will tell you a TCP joke."
"Are you ready to hear a TCP joke?"
"Yes, I am ready to hear a TCP joke."
"OK, I am about to send the TCP joke. It will last 10 seconds, has 2 characters, it does not have a setting, it ends with a punchline."
"OK, I am ready to get the TCP joke that will last 10 seconds, has 2 characters, does not have a setting, and ends with a punchline."
"I'm sorry, your connection has been timed out."
"Hello, would you like to hear a TCP joke?"

Anybody tried code licking to solve your problems?

hello world

Hey websites

For the fuckzillionth time, I don’t want to receive your notifications.
Store my preference in a cookie or something and stop harassing for fuck’s sake.

Fucking cunts!

Bitcoin Gold digging

Sql is coming to town...

I just tried to connect on my own teletype portal 😂 And this is one of the best error messages I've seen lately 😂

After 24 hours looking to monitor
Code look like this picture

During OS updates!

Source: Wim Remes, via nixCraft.