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Search - "🤦🏻♂️"
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Coding Teacher: "you'll need your laptops for the exam. To prevent you from cheating I'll disable the network now"
...pulls out the network cable on his machine...
"okay you can start now"
🤦🏻♂️17 -
The professor teaching my Web Applications course (which is taught in PHP) just admitted to learning PHP two weeks before the course started 🤦🏻♂️26
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Be me
> find an eslint bug
> report it on their github
> ask to assign it to self
> start working on it
> spend half a day to find out the source of bug
> realises the bug is coming from a library eslint is using
> report it on the library's github
> ask to assign it to self
🤦🏻♂️9 -
User: oh! An error message.
Message : Problem XY has occurred. Do YX to fix the problem.
User: Ok I try everything except what it says. ...
Ok that didn't work. I ask the IT
IT: Have you tried what it says?
User: no I didn't know ...
IT:ok do it.
User: 0.o It worked! why do we pay you if it is so easy?
Every goddamn time 🤦🏻♂️3 -
Dear outsourced developers. Don't send me your private SSH key by email. I don't need it, it allows me to access anything else you can access pretending I'm you, and it shows a misunderstanding of how SSH keys work. 🤦🏻♂️14
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LinkedIn Manager to Satya Nadella:
LM: Hey, how are you doing? At Linkedin we need to buy Github accounts.
SN: Just a min... Yes. We bought Github for $7.5 billion.
LM: Dude, we need github account for our developers. It’s just $21/user.
SN: WTF🤦🏻♂️2 -
I'm such a goof!
I observe that I create problems out of nothing when I'm stressed or even when I'm excited.
Had my US visa interview few days ago.
I might be one of stupidest person this particular consulate employee has seen.
My visa interview was done, I came out of the building and I noticed one of my passport was missing. I panicked and told an employee ( who also happened to be the same employee who took my biometrics - I had also goofed up a little there ) that I forgot my passport in the counter.
Duh, if visa is approved they will take the passport. I already knew it, but still I forgot!
🤦🏻♂️1 -
OK, so we had a session in which a so called Company (Some ecorise.in ) came to give Internship-Training-Program. Ok, he said it'll take 5-8 minutes, and then it took fucking 75 minutes for the session to end. Horrible blunders he made.
1) Did not tell about the company and important stuff for the first 50-60 minutes. Instead, was just focusing on why you should do an Internship, what is it's benefit, what does a company want from you. And why this Internship-Training Program is important... I mean seriously? - A training for Internship. 🤦🏻♂️
2) Said all the Web Developers can be Mobile App Developers with the help of just HTML and CSS.... Wow, so XAML/XML is shit now, and we will call APIs with the help of CSS rules. 🤦🏻♂️
OK, still I tolerated all that, then was the part when he said how much will be the stipend. It was fucking nothing, they said. That for first three months they will not give a single penny as it is training, and then IF the performance is good, then they will give stipend, and then Placement assurance. OK, that's good that they are assuring placement, but wait. Package of 2LPA INR... WTF Man, it's like $3107.28 for a whole Year.
OK, that too tolerated, then was the part when they said that they'll take the written test, I was like OK, let's see. We moved to a classroom, it went over-the-full capacity, so we moved back to the seminar hall. (Arrrrgggghhhhhhhhh), still tolerable. But then that guy realised that there were no question papers to take the test, then sent someone to get the print outs. Wasted 15+ minutes, I was burning inside.
In the whole seminar hall, I stood up and said, that when you knew there will be a test, why didn't you pre-prepared the sheets beforehand, he was like, that we didn't knew the count. But his tone was. like he got offended and Get-Lost-ed me out of the seminar.
Then even I said:
🙏🏻 - Nahi chaahiye aapki Company
(🙏🏻 - I don't want your Company).
And moved out.
But my point, I am a third Year College Student, and this Company came for our benefit, but I did so (and I am not sorry), so that's pretty obvious that the Company guy will talk (bitch) to the teachers about me, and tomorrow will be a bad day for me... But isn't it wrong on the side of the company also?
I mean, there was an attendance sheet passed in the beginning of the session, had he taken count from that and got the sheets printed, (He had almost an hour for that).
Secondly, when they knew that the count of students is more than expected, then why didn't they check for the classroom that whether the class can accommodate so many students or not. If not then something would have been planned accordingly... But no, the Guy (I guess, that small Company's Owner) got offended that a Student back-chat-ted a CEO of a so-called company, and so he just had to "Get-Lost" me. Checked the website of his Company, they have hardly done 3 Static Websites... I mean, WoW, I have done at-least 10X the work of the Company, alone!
I don't know, I feel happy that I kept my point, but I feel sad because I generally don't do this kind of thing (may be my tone was also wrong, I had other issues also, may be because of them and they all combined and this happened). I feel scared too, that I don't know what the Company guy will say to my teachers and what action will they take against me...
Because I know, none of my friends will stand with me when I go down, it's all fake here, everyone can just give sympathy, but nothing else.
I don't know why I am posting this here, and if you have read this till here, thank you. I just wanted to share my heart out... :-)9 -
Client project manager calls me up one day
PM: hey can you make some precise estimates on some items for a project you’re not working on? It should be easy. It’s very similar to the project you ARE working on and it’s only a handful of user stories, mostly front end stuff. We´ll need this to be done by tomorrow night.
Me: um, I guess if it’s just a few simple items. ok
PM: great! I’ll let you know when you get access to the backlog.
Me: sounds good
Link to project is sent to me. Backlog contains over 20 user stories, most of which are backend related. And it doesn’t have much to do with my current project.
I contact PM: this isn’t exactly what you announced when I had you on the phone. If you want precise estimates with a minimum of design, this could take up to a week. I could however proceed to some ballpark estimates (poker planning) for starters if you need this quickly for your roadmap.
PM: no I need PRECISE estimates down to the hour for each item.
Me: ok then, it’ll take up to a week.
PM: 🤬🤬🤬. You told me it could be done in a day. I’m coming to realize your word can’t really be trusted.
Me: 🤦🏻♂️14 -
Me: We have to update the platform, but before doing this we should backup it.
Client: Ok, but a backup is not enough. What if we were not able to revert to the previous version? We should perform a manual copy.
Me: ... 🤦🏻♂️1 -
Our system never had sessions that expired. A recent hack at the client caused us to revisit the security measures we had in place.
The person who was on the project since it's start 8 years ago was tasked with fixing this issue. It has a simple solution: add session expiration, and extend the session to an hour from now with each request.
This week I found out how he did it🤦🏻♂️. He added session expirations, but extended the session by an hour with each request. By making 10 requests in quick succession, your session is extended by 10 hours.3 -
I give math lessons to high school people in my "free" time. One of my guys needs to use calculator to compute sums with 0 and yet he wants to become a programmer 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️3
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I don't get it why there are so many people out, that think testing stupid model classes with getters and setter is needed.
Dude. There is no logic in this class ... it's pure data that gets not modified there (well except if you call the setter)
I've wasted way too much time writting useless unit test because some ppl want to masturbate on 100% code coverage 🤦🏻♂️12 -
There are clients who always suggest an idea then after they suggest they will say "...again don't do this yet, its not a big deal blah blah blah"
Then the other day they will ask if their idea is already implemented.
🤦🏻♂️6 -
Junior devs PR -
line 98: Catches FileNotFoundException.
line 99: Immediately throws FileNotFoundException
--
CHANGE REQUESTED 🤦🏻♂️ -
Just found an interface in an app of my company that uses the best of both worlds: csv AND xml 🤦🏻♂️
<Name>John;<Lastname>Doe;
🤣1 -
While in a meeting with our CEO, I make mention of the fact that we now have the opportunity of being able to "repay technical debt". Before being able to go on much further with the conversation, the "dev manager" turns to me...
"Dev Manager": You're going to have to explain 'technical debt'.
Me: ... 🤦🏻♂️4 -
Customer: Does your program do everything I specified in that mail from 2 months ago?
(btw the mail was 5 sentences...)
Me: Yes.
Customer: And does it do xyz?
Me: No, but to be fair, you did not specify that!
Customer: But that's what I've got you for! You should have known that!
🤦🏻♂️2 -
Hey guys so we need to start taking accessibility seriously, it’s the law - right now we currently do nothing.
So let’s start with something super simple. Alt text has to be provided for an image...
“This is all bollocks let’s be honest”
😳🤦🏻♂️
Um...so I don’t make the rules, the W3C define the standards for the web. Disabled users matter...7 -
Co-worker on phone with our manager trying to explain something to him:
Co: Do you even know what a foreigner key is?
M: Yes, but bla bla bla
Ps: The manager doesn’t really know what a foreigner key is 🤦🏻♂️11 -
When Xcode 9.3 is available, but Swift.org hasn’t updated to Swift 4.1 yet.
What the hell? 🤦🏻♂️
Update:: just kidding, it shows apparently. Ugh.2 -
4th day at new job: password sharing through emails or excel sheet that’s password protected! Well, there is something called LastPass, but no they don’t like 🤦🏻♂️1
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Make the ubuntu upgrade to 18.04 and it takes forever to finish
It also updates new version of i3, I hereby gets this shit 🤦🏻♂️3 -
after a vast number of emails, phone calls and cross-client tests with a customer, because „the light grey background of the new template magically disappeared“.... I had one final idea!
me: „could you please turn the contrast knob on your monitor?“
reaction of the customer: „OHHH.......“
🤦🏻♂️ -
So this happened a while ago, me and my friends designed a website for our college and upon the day of releasing it you realize what assholes people can be when you receive messages like this doesn’t open in uc browser🤦🏻♂️
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well, i just screwed what might have been a great opportunity at a great company with a recent capital injection by Uber.
I don't know what the hell my brain was thinking when answering at the technical interview, like wtf? they asked for an use of design patterns, and i started thinking for uses in my daily life (???), like, outside of work?? to which of course i answered "no, I can't think of a time I have used them" 🤡🤦🏻♂️
They asked what motivated me to work at that company, and I basically answered "money and free education perks" 🤡
The worst part is that they contacted me! So for some reason I was pretty sure that I would ace that interview with flying colors. Yeah well no, fuck those expectations.4 -
We have three sprint refinement meetings per week without any work. We just spent today's 1 hour refinement meeting without uttering a single word. Dumb Management 🤦🏻♂️2
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When you work on something for few hours and then write a script to recursively replace strings in your project but forget to take into account the git index and end up corrupting it 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
I know I should have pushed commits in between. Lesson learnt -
client has no clue what he wants and keeps changing the requirements of the projects; wants to deploy "to a desktop app like electron but faster, but also as a lib for developer to use on a server like a CMS" 🤦🏻♂️; takes two hours in a call and literally tells me that he want to "hear himself speak" so he can clarify what he needs...
me: NOP2 -
Previous Post: https://devrant.com/rants/1557094/...
Holy Lamas! The fucked up SharePoint Saga continues.
Lick my glory Cucumber!
2 Weeks ago, Project Department Boss:
We will put a hold to the SharePoint development. Our Proof of Concept failed, even free opensource Software provides more functions.
Me: Alright, I just told you that from the beginning, but this were two great months wasted. In this time I had more important Stuff to do. But thanks that your four workers are overpayd and do batshit, GREAT.
Meeting last week, Project Dep. Head:
We will continue the SharePoint development. We will migrate all of our Data, even if it has a lot of flaws.
We will use OneNote as Wiki.
Me thinking: That's it, we are doomed!! I will suck my own Cucumber sideways... Please just once care about the People using this Software. Why do you say I am the most crucial guy for this project and then give a fuck about my ideas?!🤬
No they only care for the payslip and the promotions, even if the Software is a Clusterfuck😭.
I wont stand if you start using over 200 OneNote Documents!! This decision will drive us straight Bollocks in to the wall. That would be data Terrorism 2.0 🤬
Honestly I will either start give a fuck and plan out my own tool or give up entirely. But I can't my superior is such a nice person and has the wish for a great tool 😥. She even appointed me to this position, because I'm more tech savy than her.
Next week I will have some talks, this cant go on. Burning Millions of Dollars for years and just presenting shit. I never had dreamed, that I would be involved in such shit 🤦🏻♂️
If I start to dev myself, I will do it private beside my job, write up all my hours and get them payd out as a dev and not as a Supporter (Yea my position is IT-Supporter). That would be 180 $ per Hour.
Then I will show the fuckfaces how it's done. This was also suggested by my superiour, she's really a great person ❤️ -
So i made an account on this education videos android app for checking their ui. Used the name "Han solo" and... they contacted me for buying their courses!
Geek reference vs marketing logics:
Tech people: 1
Marketing dept : 🤦🏻♂️3 -
Someone had been too lazy to read the documentation and now we have to come up with a solid and correct implementation, which should have been done months ago
RTFM, people..!!! 😏🤦🏻♂️2 -
well it wasn't "cutting-edge" but it was pretty ugly, yet good
it was called Instagrabber, it's still on GitLab, but it's archived
it was first open source project of mine which gained publicity of over 500 people, but in the end i let down lots of people by discontinuing it
if someone's interested in that stupid cringe project, search "Instagrabber source" or "Instagrabber Awais" and first GitLab or F-DROID link would be it. 😂😂🤦🏻♂️2 -
So a little while back, my location was officially switched from "Specific Office Location" to "Home Office", i.e. I was finally _officially_ full-time WFH. The other day, I had to visit one of our physical offices for the first time in years. What I didn't realise until that point was that I HAVE to work from home: I have to access a specific VPN in the US to do my work, but you can't connect to any VPNs from within our office.
Genius.
🤦🏻♂️4 -
Microsoft crosses Apple with most valued company.
How tables have turned again. 🤦🏻♂️
https://reuters.com/technology/...11 -
Le neue studento (a.k.a. new students) be like :
- What's the difference between Java and JavaScript? Different version? It's the same, is it?
🤔🤔🤔🤔
🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️rant cs major joke javascript first year questions funny first year as cs major java college life college cs5 -
I've been doing pretty well since lockdown (March) and making some projects to spent my time and practicing problems on hackerrank, leetcode, etc.
But now I don't feel like it anymore, another day passes by where I decide to solve or make something but still can't somehow.
my GitHub's contribution shows no activity since 4 weeks, how do you guys keep yourself motivated every day?
coz this lockdown is soo draining. ugh 🤦🏻♂️ -
Meeeen this is crazy. The director created a testing route inside the actual api controller instead inside the spec file. Common man. We better than this. 🤦🏻♂️2
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Today is the last day of my Lunar New Year holidays, which lasts over a week from last friday, the exact amount of time I haven’t been coding.
I have to return to work on tomorrow 🤦🏻♂️
Tell me how you guys get back your performance after a long holiday?4 -
Today, I saw a table mean to store tags designed horizontally, each column store a tag with value 1 or 0. 🤦🏻♂️