Learnt Murphy's law the hard way,

Don't use your office laptop to create a personal auto porn downloading project specially when your boss suddenly wants to use your laptop to do a product demo to client.

Now looking for a new job, let me know if anyone need a smart developer who loves solving problems like the one mentioned above.

November 2022

*Wife*: What do you want for x-mas? A new phone maybe? Yours has lived through a lot already - perhaps it's time for an upgrade?
*I*: Naah, thanks. My trusty S7 still works incredibly well. I also have all those 2FAs set up there and stuff I'm too lazy to transfer over to a new device.

*Parents*: What do you want for–//–
*I*: Naah, thanks. My tr–//–

*in-laws*: What do you want for–//–
*I*: Naah, thanks. My tr–//–

*Siblings*: What do you want for–//–
*I*: Naah, thanks. My tr–//–

January 2023:
*My phone*:

Fuck today.

Today I was supposed to go into work and set up a dozen or so units for beta testing (its been a year and a half coming)..

Got up nice and early to get a head start on things. Stubbed (and broke) my motherfucking toe, then spilled my cereal milk on my laptop.. subsequently spend the following 2 hours tearing down and cleaning my poor little lappy. Get her all put back together, starting to feel a little better about the day. Push the power button, and fucking nothing but a tiny little fan noise for half a damn second.

With this luck I don't even want to move, lest a magic falling anvil decides to adorn my head..

I'm in my second call from hell today. Passed off first to a teammate to run a meeting. First one started 10 hours ago, this started 5 hours ago. Neither are related. Neither show signs of resolving.

Other teammate is on the same call that started 2 days ago.

Who the hell pissed Murphy off?

So I bought myself some computer glasses after feeling uncomfortable looking at a screen with "bare" eyes (I don't wear corrective glasses).

But the other day, I lost them.

I looked for them everywhere, under each grain of dust I could find. They were nowhere to be found.

Reluctantly, I bought new ones. They arrived today, I unpack them, test them, and then do some flat cleaning. I lift some envelope and...

My first pair was sitting there, innocently.

Fuck me.

whatever can go wrong, will go wrong.

me: Have you heard of Murphy's law?
them: Yeah.
me: What is it?
them: If something can go wrong, it will go wrong.
me: Right, have you heard of Cole's law?
them: No, what is it?

Murphy's law is completely true.

Deployed my own software the very first time on a customer system on monday.

Today I'm at a job college class when my boss calls me: "...Hey yeah (unrelated) (yadda yadda) the software does not function for anyone").

I fucking knew it.
We don't have a proper project planning nor a real project manager/lead, we don't do QA, and now it's gone to shit.

I did my own testing extensively on monday & Tuesday, everything looked alright and worked like a charm.

I'm looking forward to the weekend already...

sometimes I wonder if "Murphy's Law" was coined by a developer

First off murphy is a bitch. Week started off good, nothing bad happening then friday night came and i get an email about a site being down. Ok check it out real quick, cert is expired. No real big deal just a 20 minute fix, didn't bother me that i didn't get an expiry alert. Now is where murphy decided to be the biggest fucking bucktoothed cocksucker, generate a csr for a wildcard domain using an existing key and sent it off when i get it back the private key doesn't match the cert. Again ok maybe i fucked up, generate a selfsigned cert no fucking problem. Contact support to see if they have an idea. Oh now is when it gets fun, the fucking dumbass preceded to tell me how i didn't know what i was doing and how i just had to generate a csr and private key at the same time after i explained to the bastard that I've already tested it with a selfsigned cert. (How does this fucker have a job) By now apparently i was pissed off enough to scare murphy's pansy ass away cause i told the fucker to refund my money, got a list of 30 subdomains and setup letsencrypt on it. Now the part on this that is fucking hilarious is that it took me damn near 24 hours to be called a fucking idiot from a guy that doesn't know his ass between a hole in the fucking ground and 30 minutes of being pissed off more than i have been since i took anger management classes in the 9th grade to say fuck it and switch.

Murphy's law:
When you try to unplug a USB from a FULL USB HUB with twisted (and same color wires)
You always will unplug the wrong usb at fist shot.

I think that this can be applied also to phone chargers,RJ45,RJ11,etc.....

Last week I received an invitation to lead the development of a e-commerce redesign, replatforming and data migration. I was excited to work on it, and started the analysis and planning, glad to spend time focusing on quality. But Murphy's law is never asleep - this Monday, I was asked to speed things up and reduce a 4 month project to 1 week.

goodhart's law, the cobra effect/campbell's law, murphy's law, atwood's law, benfords law

what am i missing

Is there a Developers' Manifesto? Like Agile Manifesto?

If not let's start one here, I'll start:

-We should not be working outside work hours except for exceptional cases, hours != 24/7 && exceptional != 7 days a week
-Death to last minute changes!
-Everyone needs to understand Murphy's Law, it's real!

Best debugging trick ever:

Wear your fucking glasses while coding so that you do not mistake COMMA(,) with a DOT (.).

So by
1. Doing that (which obviously aren't a huge number) and
2. Cleaning my screen (yes that).

I was able to wrap my head around the issue that almost wasted one day.
So what I intended to pass as string concatenation join operation value actually was being passed as an argument to the underlying function (that wasn't taking care of it and returning a timestamp from thin air).

Murphy's Law in production and practice.
Nice!

Depressing music continues......!

When your week has been so stressful... you just want to curl up in the corner and cry.

Murphy's law is taking me for a ride of a lifetime right now, and just when you start seeing light at the end of the tunnel, it's just a lightbulb and another dead end.

F£~*{*}£{*\€|>\€\£~£¥\\*£,'%]#]}[#>\£|¥|+>]£\€£|€|!{¥]*$;&,!:@&;&939/);$$CK!!!!

Glad I could get that off my chest 😆

"Oh, netbook is on low energy. Naaah, it should be enough for an hour."
- me, hours ago

One hour delay for the flight.

Suicide in front of the train.

Now I stand over two hours in the train and we cannot leave the train. All I want is finish my grot damn prototype...

Remember my friends

Fuck 2019. I still have one photo of 1/1/2019 on my instagram profile as my first photo with hopes to achieve what i was planning to achieve. But life happened. Things went wrong. Murphy's fucking law took over. Fuck you

Start fresh 2020. Learn from the mistakes. Expect more mistakes because they are inevitable. But do your best to NOT repeat the old ones.

We are going into the new decade. No more 201X year.

-Delete all negative energy
-Cleanse all BULLSHIT
-Remove everything weighting you down
-DETACH FROM THE PARASITE PEOPLE
-Stay with the real people
-Stay with family

2 more weeks until 2020

🙏🙏🙏

Is it just me or does everyone face a murphy's law situation when it comes to coding drones??

Every time we have finished a project and deployed it the first time at least half of the components are outdated already 😒 Even if we worked only 2 weeks on something.

I hate Murphy's law!

It is approximately 42 degrees C outside. And guess whose fucking compressor just went to shit? Mine. Fucking piece of shit. I absolutely fucking hate this shit. Finding the time to go to the shop is pointless when I can fix it myself, but IN the fucking event that the compressor is actually faulty and needs to be replaced then I would have to struggle to wait for the fucking part to get here. If my luck permits and this is an issue that is fixable through a simple relay change then fucking hooray.

But I know how fucking shitty my fucking luck is and its going to fuck me in the ass probably. I will troop through the heat, no problem, but I am the one that carries my 2 year old daughter everywhere and I am not about to put her through that bullshit.

So I call my wife and explain to her the situation, I don't need for her to do fucking anything, I can take care of it myself, but I tell her NOT to have me go out on random bullshit with the girl while the car is like that, I did it to make her understand beforehand because every day is an additional 1 and a half hours of driving around the city to take her do bullshit. I told her that in the event of me needing to go pick something up then it would have to be after the fucking sun goes out(which in this fucking bullshit ass town it happens after fucking 7 or 7:30pm) and she would have to stay home with the girl. What does she do? she gets upset. Of course she got fucking upset. Like if I need that fucking bs right now. OH and my fucking main Linux machine is apparently having battery issues.

OAN my manager gave me my performance review yesterday. The she made are outstanding and my score is perfect. The board is going to give a raise to everyone of us that got an high enough score so that got me in a good mood. I am holding on to that feeling before I lose my shit. Every single fucking time some bs puts me in this mood I am constantly wishing that a motherfucker would.

Fucking bullshit man. Can't have a FUCKING break anyfuckingwere.

This just in on an episode of Murphy's fucking law.

I just migrated Test data into Production. If I start a new project, Murphy's law indicates that my phone will ring, and the migration will have been a total loss.

If I sit and do nothing, Murphy's corollary tells me the data migration will be a success?

So I've been getting a lot of attention from various companies ranging from small tech start ups, to big established companies. I've had a lot of interviews that all went really well! So some weeks passed, and I have no feed back from any companies, so I proceed. I eventually get an offer from one company that is really good. They day i accepted it, I received about 4 other offers from all the other companies! And I got about 5 interviews to now decline! Murphy's law at is cruellest!

The name of today is Murphy.

So, the LAN at location A can't reach the one at location B. Turns out that something yet unknown is blowing fuses at location A, but after disconnecting a ton of unknowns, the router and a radio link station are up again. Yay Internet, but still no VPN connection to location B.

Needing the passwords for the OpenVPN servers, I notice that encfs4win refuses to mount the drive where the password manager files reside. Of course, any problem must have the company of other problems. Eventually, the encfs drive mounts on another computer.

So, I can access the OpenVPN computer running the client side and check the logs, which tell me that network B is unreachable.

Both networks and an encfs setup all die at the same time? Right, Murphy, what are you going to come up with next? No, don't tell me because I just got read errors from a hard drive.

Whenever I bring my laptop to do personal work during lunch, I have to work through my hour. Whenever I don't, I have all the time in the world. :P

Never again will I use eclipses egit extension. First eclipse thought that my plain text java source code should be encoded in some bizarre occult way which made eclipse think its binary what made me try pretty much anything one can do with a .gitattributes file before a colleague suggested to not trust eclipse eith the encoding it was explicitly told to use, then I fetched another branch to merge them which somehow killed my .project file and forced me to delete and refetch the whole thing which led to eclipse not longer recognizing it as a java project. May it be because I'm to stupid to use my tools? Yeah, probably. But I'm done with egit, it's all console gitting from now on, fuck suggested practice.

Murphy's Law of Continuous Integration: If your code finally unbreaks the build, then the build will break because the PGP Key server didn't respond in time.

Is relying on probability bad practice? I have a container that needs to know about all other instances of the same container and assign a unique ID to itself on initialization. I thought that if I selected a big random number as its id on startup, the chances of it having the same id as another instance is very low.

To prevent two instances from having the same id I could check for all running instances on the network, but what if two instances start at the same time? They won't find each other since none of them will be fully initialized when their id checks run.

Probability says I'll be fine, Murphy's law says I won't. What do?