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Search - "unicorns"
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Tech industry: "We need thousands upon thousands of engineers!"*
* With a minimum of 5 years+ experience in about 30 technologies, able to do magic and ride unicorns while working 28 hours pr day just for the lolz of it. We do not provide training, courses or certifications of any kind. You are supposed to be able to pull those out of your ass yourself!7 -
I buy rubber duck related gifts for people in the company I work for. And somehow I have gotten unicorns back. Today I think they won.6
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Please don't make junior developers feel they're a burden.
Have you ever googled "how to mentor junior developers"? It's quite mind-blowing how many articles, talks and panels are on this topic. And yet still junior developers are not feeling welcomed in their companies.
Yup, you guessed it, we also have something to add (based on our own experience):
1. Asking for help is not easy. Please don't blow juniors off by telling them to read docs when they ask a question. Always assume they've read it and did a sprint to solve the problem. They ask you, because they see you as a mentor and really need your help. If you can, spend more time with them and guide through the entire problem solving process.
2. Please don't think "I learnt it this way so you should too". If you're in charge of teaching a junior developer, don't expect them to be a carbon copy of yourself. Because even though in your opinion your approach is more "pro", they might not be there yet to use it properly. And last, but not least:
3. Of course, juniors will compare themselves with seniors on their team. And there'll be moments they feel so guilty and so afraid that they cost the company too much, that they need training, and supervision, or are between projects and are not bringing in any money, and they'll fear that their company regrets hiring them. Make sure they don't feel like a burden. As juniors, we often
have this misconception what is expected from us.
Dear tech companies, please set very clear expectations and tell your juniors you're happy. Don't get us wrong here. We don't expect unicorns, roses and pats on the back from companies. We do understand- this is business, and at the end of the day we all are here to make money. To do so, companies need to make smart investments. Junior dev with a great assistance, planned support, and a clear training program will become a great asset. It really is as simple as that.12 -
Being a developer means...
- Writing code
- Fixing bugs and issues
- Impromptu project manager to current project
- Making coffee
- Seeing unicorns
- Listening to the boss' suggestion that goes horribly wrong
- Contemplate10 -
Life as a homeless developer.
I'm a lil brainsick but homelessness makes you that way.
I started writing software as a hedge against an old injury i had from my teen years. I have a unique condition leaving me with limited use of my hand as such any jobs like cashier call center and they like are of limits to me, i can't hold change because my hands don't bend flat, and to much typing is excruciating. Therefore being adev should get the most bang for the buck that I have left. Ive been doing this for 12 years. Well it's all bullshit and unicorns. I can't get a job to save my life. All i get is calls from recruiters wanting a full stack retard. I'm an erlang developer for about 5 years, c# php no i can't do Photoshop or frontend gay as colors because it's a different skillet. Oh but trumpy says we're at the lowest unemployment ever, ya because we're all homeless and companies are still looking for unicorns, they don't exist just like the fake jobs which is the real fake news. In reality if a company wants you its because their dev left and you are to fix their broken shit, which never worked in the first place thus cannot be fixed besides I'm not a plumber. In my opinion many companies nowadays are run by liberal sjw children who don't value your time but want the product now, spoilt. Recruiters are the worst, gimme money because i touched your resume. I'd rather just kill myself than try to appease some fucking retarded children. Its so awesome to live in a tunnel while my skills entropy while i have 160 self published github repos, know many programming languages and be told your have no value. its those same children that dont understand the flow of money or value loyalty, claim we have all these jobs but no skillid employees, so they can bring in more visa overstayers, underpay them and claim record profits, the more you pay forieners my countries money the less there is to go around in the society leading to disenfranchised people like me, and you wonder why there's so many shootings in il. How long can i endure homelessness before i start becoming a criminal? Soon i will have no other option. You employers had a choice but I'm going out with a bang.25 -
Why did suddenly all websites start putting recaptcha in front of every user submission? Have they not heard of request limiting? I'm so tired of having to identify bridges, store fronts, cars, and unicorns before being able to do ANYTHING on the internet. For fuck's sake.10
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Clicking "share" on directory in Windows Explorer, digging through config panel, fidgeting with network discovery options, toggling password protection, digging through account management, jumping over a chair 3 times to channel my inner Bill Gates, checking directory permissions, sacrificing 7 virgin unicorns, go into lusrmgr.msc, curse various gods, install CIFS1.0 protocol, reboot computer, disable encryption, checking registry, trying to summon Steve Ballmer using the blood of a bald goat and sweat-scented candles... 5 hours.
Install Ubuntu on spare SSD, mount Windows NTFS drive, start SMB daemon and set up samba users... 15 minutes.12 -
Entry level Junior Developer with experience of a Fullstack developer for a salary of an intern.
Can we add unicorns in that list?7 -
Hey here we go:)
My first comic series - “DevStory”
A story of two devs aiming at changing the world’s impact about cryptos by their own token project.
Bugs, cheap scammers, money, flying unicorns and a lot of laughs!
(Episode 1)27 -
Starting new game development project.
Coder:" ok guys, I think that this time we have to focus much more on sprints management and documentation"
Designer:"Ye, this time we should use better scrum software, like jira or youtrack"
Artist:"but Asana has the unicorns when you complete a task"4 -
Ever had a day that felt like you're shoveling snow from the driveway? In a blizzard? With thunderstorms & falling unicorns? Like you shovel away one m² & turn around and no footprints visible anymore? And snow built up to your neck?
Today my work day was like that.. xcept shit..shit instead of pretty & puffy snow!!
Working on things a & b, trying to not mess either one up, then comes shit x, coworker was updating production.. ofc something went wrong.. again not testing after the update..then me 'to da rescue'.. :/ hardly patch things up, so it works..in a way.. feature c still missing due to needed workarounds.. going back to a and b.. got disrupted by the same coworker who is nver listening, but always asking too much..
And when I think I finally have the b thing figured out a f-ing blocker from one of our biggest clients.. The whole system is unresponsive.. Needles to say, same guy in support for two companies (their end), so they filed the jira blocker with the wrong customer that doesn't have a SLA so no urgent emails..and then the phone calls.. and then the hell broke loose.. checking what is happening.. After frantic calls from our dba to anyone who even knows that our customer exists if they were doing sth on the db.. noup, not a single one was fucking with the prod db.. The hell! Materialised view created 10 mins ago that blocked everything..set to recreate every 10 minutes..with a query that I am guessing couldn't even select all that data in under 15.. dafaaaq?! Then we kill it..and again it is there.. We found out that customers dbas were testing something on live environment, oblivious that they mamaged to block the entire db..
FML, I'm going pokemon hunting.. :/ codename for ingress n beer..3 -
My Unicorns 🦄.
If you look at the picture you will see more than one and there is a funny story behind them. About three years ago I was talking about a new project and I wanted to call it the Magic API, however I work for a religious organization and they said that it would be a problem to call it that. So I said what the hell how about unicorn? They said that would probably be okay. Then I saw that Microsoft had unicorn tags for their developers so it has been my thing ever since then.
So Unicorns it is. 🦄4 -
Fuck this I need to ventilate.
Thinking about job change because maintaining and extending 3 years old codebase (flask project) is FUCKIN exhausting. It was badly written since start by someone who obviously didn't know much about python. (Going by commit history.)
Examples:
- if var != None / if var == None
- if var is not None / if var is None (well..)
- Returning self-parsed obscure JSONs from dict variable
- Serializing dictionaries into database by str() (both sqlalchemy and mysql support JSON format) - THEY ARE ALMOST UNUSABLE OTHER WAY AROUND (luckily, python can deal even with that)
- celery tasks, the way they are called they BLOCK the whole flask (not bad in itself, but if connection breaks there are no errors, nothing it just hangs)
- obscure generator/yielding that contains return of flask's response in itself
- creating fifteen thousands of variables one by one where they would look so nicely as dict keys, and hey they are then both MANUALLY SERIALIZED into returning dict by "%s" (string formatting) [okey, some of them are objecst like datetime but MATE WTF]
- many, many more, PEP lint shall not pass
I would rather deal with fresh startup owners wanting me to program unicorns in one week then trying to extend and manage zombie-like projects.
Nothing personal against the firm I actually like the place.3 -
Hey DevRant Fam! Hope everyone is doing very well!, I’ve been browsing job posts lately... I’m just finishing off my 2nd year in uni, and i came across this beauty by a company called “WestBury Partners” these blokes are based in Sydney’s CBD i believe and they’re offering what seems to be 200k+pa now as a junior that seems quite difficult to get but anything is possible
Though I’ve seen the requirements and I’m not sure I understand some of them, one i seem to have and understand is having a high level of passion in software development but the rest i don’t know much about 😅🤓.
Are these guys looking for “unicorns”? I am interested in trading software and how they work, i love learning new things i will attach a screen shot of the page :-).
Hope everyone has an amazing day or night wherever you may be! Also I very much thank you for reading my post it means a lot to me!
Best wishes ❤️
Milo16 -
Chasing fucking unicorns…
I want an F# job where I don’t have to deal with the M$ bs beyond dotnet.. no fucking M$ servers, no Win workstations, none of that bs that makes work uncomfortable.
Guess that ain’t happening.
Looks like I’m going to be stuck writing PHP for the dough indefinitely, and be content in playing around with greatness on my own time.7 -
I can’t anymore with those companies hiring unicorns only, reposting the same job offer for 6 months while they could have hired someone more junior and taught them. 1 year my girlfriend is in the “no experience” death loop while she outsmarts me by far.9
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Finally installed a custom ROM (dirty unicorns) and added a designated devRant icon in the navigation bar because it's the only app I ever use on this phone5
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I see all kinds of rants here about how coworkers and bosses know nothing about programming. And I'm over here like, how'd they get a job? I feel like every company wants you to be a code ninja rockstar badass, and they're constantly telling me they're pursuing these other unicorns, not me. What gives? I don't know everything, but I know more than done ranters coworkers and bosses. Fuck.
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"I try to take my camera everywhere with me so that I’ll be ready when unicorns crapping rainbows come flying in from the heavens. " - Robert Otani1
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To all websites requiring at least one upper case, one lower case, one number, one special character, 25 emoji and 49 unicorns in the password when signing up.
If you say something is required, then your regex BETTER be checking ONLY for those things. You should not have hidden requirements for passwords that users are supposed to dream about and know. Especially if it's a super time-sensitive thing that they should have opened 2 Fridays ago.
I had to pull my hair out for 20 minutes (that felt like an hour) before looking at their code and reading their regex. The regex was different from what the page said the requirements actually were. What were they even thinking? 😑
The rest of everything related to this organization uses an SSO system, why can't they just use it? Isn't the whole point of SSO to avoid a different login for every tiny part of the system?
I wonder what the other less technically inclined people using the system are doing right now. Sadly, I have no way of letting them know.
I sincerely hope the dev that made that website faces the same thing while picking a password for creating an account somewhere else and realizes what he/she did.
I really needed to let it out.
I feel much better now.
Time to take out the stress ball :)1 -
So, for a few months, as my finals are comming near, I was wondering is it a good idea to re-format my SSD and put Ubuntu on my laptop.
Reason? So I can't play games on my laptop and focus more on coding.
Downloaded Ubuntu, format, install, I was happy.
Soon as it installed, I downloaded all the sht I need (slack, discord, VSCode, nodejs, pixie dust and unicorns...), and did a 10 minute setup so the OS feels "nice".
After few hours of "trying" to work, I noticed it runs rather slow (vscode keeps freezing, app I'm developing stutters in chrome...), so maybe Ubuntu is being a douche to my laptop.
Downloaded xubuntu, did mostly the same (less work has to be done since xubuntu feels nicer than ubuntu (thanks xfce (mouse <3)), and started doing the same.
I realised that I can't use any of my Logitech stuff (mouse, headset (and by "can't use, I mean I can't use the Logiteh gaming software to set the DPI, mouse speed, buttons, nor set up the headset, so they sound like jack shit)).
Frustrated, I went to fix all the stuff manualy, with no success.
Also, the OS froze 3 times completely.
Luckly, I made a whole Windows 10 backup so I've spent a few hours more just waiting for it to restore.
Oh, did I mention I can't tether my Android device internet via usb on ubuntu?
Do I have so much to learn or this is how my life is going to look like when I start working as a developer?
*insert Sad panda gif here*2 -
I thought the issue was mostly with people in tech. But I now believe, tech people are mostly misled to believing woke bullshit, world is all nice and clean, and made of unicorns.
I mean all these does make them smart enough to run/code the machines, be obedient mofo, but dumb enough not to ask questions.
Toughen up you mofos, harden up. Build and sell your own bullshit, than working for someone else. And being comfy and then being on the way to your death bed.
Especially young people.... Take risks rather than risking it to tooo late you mofos. If you have a scratch, do it early, before you end up being a slob.....5 -
I could work from home sometimes, the coworkers would be cool but focused, new tech would be encouraged and pms would defend devs against crappy clients, oh and no windows allowed, yeah I dont like sunlight (like linus house)undefined cool job linux no windows job pichardo for president algo wk62 fantasies unicorns weird crap
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Question for the Android users!
I'm tired of Google and its intrusive apps and shit so I'm thinking installing a custom ROM, but I see that there are plenty of them (Lineage, Paranoid, Dirty Unicorns, etc etc), so I'm looking for advice ✌️😎14 -
A system of universally accessible storage. Here is what I mean:
1. The fastest protocol available would be used (LAN:smb, else:sftp)
2. File transfers would be direct (no download from A, upload to B)
3. Transfers could be resumed
4. Transparent to normal programs
5. Integrated with GUI file manager
But I'm extremely bad at C, so... -
Story!!!
I'm feeling very bad for the choice I make...
TLDR: I started looking for a new job, just because the salary wasn't enough. Talked with my boss, he agreed to raise it and I agreed to stay. Two weeks after that (today) I talked with him and told I will be leaving.
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Starting January, just arriving of three weeks on vacation in another country to see my girlfriend, I started looking for my first house, to live with my girlfriend. Because of this future life (she arrives March 13th), I started to look for a new job which pays more. By now, I have worked there for the past three years.
At the end of January I found a house and had some good proposals, so I talked with my boss that it was possible for me to leave in the near future because I really needed the money, despite really liking to work there, so he made me a proposal to give me the increase I wanted (250€) and I agreed.
Just after that, I started calling the companies to say that I would not be available anymore. I usually try to be the most honest as possible with these things.
Past a week, I was talking face to face to a recruiter to say the same thing, but this time he increased his past proposal and showed me the company he wanted to send me; it was one of the unicorns of Portugal and with a really really great technology stack, and after convincing me that I could be wrong about the decision I had made (well... I recognize I can be wrong sometimes), I agreed to go in a meeting with the company.
Past Thursday I went there - Well... I was wrong. I really loved the culture of the company (the thing I most like in the one I'm right now), I would be working with a great technology stack, and having a really good salary.
Today I talked with my boss and said I will be leaving in April 23rd. He told me that didn't think it was right the way I handled this, because, if he knew with some antecedece, he wouldn't have made a proposal for a new development that only I could do (I did the analysis for it), and would be searching for a replacement sooner.
Right now I'm 22 years old, junior developer, going to live with my girlfriend in the next month, and the only one in the company who knows PHP with its stack (Linux, MySQL, Apache).
Before all of that I had a net salary of +- 750€, and it was increased to 950€ after the proposals, and in this new position it will be 1150€.
I don't know how to feel. People usually said that I have to start thinking a little bit more about myself (my bosses included) and I tried this adviced... :(10 -
If you're self-employed, have your legal shit together even if you trust a client.
Your legal work is not for expected cases when everything is rainbows and unicorns, it's for the times when SHTF. It provides you and your prospective clients with clarity on what to mutually expect.
There will be scope creep, there will be late payments,... You can be lenient, but cover your legal bases so that you don't have to be. -
I have a game night at my place every other week. We play cards against humanity, unstable unicorns, million dollars but, or exploding kittens and order some food from a different place every time.
Other than that it's late night game sessions. -
Okay so being a developer is mostly like playing a never ending game of whack-a-mole with BUGS, you think you have fixed one until few more pops up like a bad case of acne.
But you know what's even worse? When you finally get something working, and you're feeling all proud of yourself, and then someone comes along and tells you that it's not "visually appealing" enough. "Can't you just add some more glitter and unicorns to the homepage? Oh, and can you make it look like it was designed by a unicorn who majored in art?"12 -
Did you know 2021 saw 44 unicorns startups? For people who don't know what unicorns are, unicorns are startups having billion dollar valuation. This made me wonder about startups with no revenue, how are they valuated? So researched a bit on it and penned down my learnings in this article.
https://readosapien.com/how-to-valu...7 -
Hummm(flash back)... I was studying art and design when I've decided to become a web designer, but by the time it came to take my degree also took some frontend languages and them(big explosion and fireworks) it was like magic, I could design and give life to my creations!!! 6 years later still is magic(not the rainbow and unicorns type) ...you know dam well i am talking to you javascript(and your dam post apocalypse bugs)... 😁😁😁 still wouldn't imagine my self doing anything else!
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Recently asked myself questions:
Which is the most unpleasant when you developing a mobile application (for me its when design(UI/UX) changes after feature was developed.
which is the most complicated stage in developing a mobile application for you
Place plus(like) if you are mobile dev
P.S. Unicorns are real🦄🦄🦄1 -
update : we are at hr round baby!!!
part 1 : https://devrant.com/rants/5528056/...
part 2 (in comments) : https://devrant.com/rants/5550145/...
the tech market is crazy mann! it's one of the top indie fintech companies in our country and has a great valuation.
i totally felt that they i am crashing the interviews , and am seriously not trying to be humble. before the dsa round , i was trying to mug up how insertion sort works 🥲
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now my dilemma is should i switch if i get the offer. in a summary:
current company:
- small valuation but profitable (haven't picked funding for last 3 years , so poast valuation is some double digit million $, but can easily be a unicorn company)
- very major b2b player in my country. almost all unicorns (including this fintech company) and some major MNCs are their client and they have recently acquired a few other companies of us and eu too, making them- a decent global player
- meh work : i love being a cutting edge performer in android but here we make sdks that need to support even legacy banking apps. so tech stack is a lot of verbose java and daily routine includes making very minor changes to actual code and more towards adding tests , maintaining wrapper sdks in react/cordova/unity etc, checking client side code etc.
- awesome work life balance : since work is shit and i am fast enough, i am usually working only 2-4 hours a day. i joined gym, got into shape , and have already vsited 5 places in last 6 months, and i am a guy who didn't used to have time even on sundays. here, we get mote paid leaves than what i would usually need.
- learning opportunities: not exactly from the company codebase, but they provide unlimited access to various course learning platforms like linkedin learning, udemy and others, so i joined some web dev baches and i now know decent frontend too. plus those hybrid sdks also give a light context to new things
new company :
- positives : multi billion valuation, one of the top players in fintech , have been mostly profitable ( except a few quarters)
- positive : b2c so its (hopefully) going to put me back into racing shoes with kotlin, jetpack and latest libraries.
- more $$$ for your boy :)
- negetive : they seem to be on hiring spree and am afraid to junp ship after seeing the recent coinbase layoffs. fintech is scary these days
- negetive : if they are hiring people like me, then then they are probably hiring people worse than me 😂. although thats not my concern what my main concer is how they interviewed. they have hired a 3rd party company that takes interviews of people FOR THEM! i find that extremely impolite, like they don't even wanna spare their devs to hire people they are gonna work with. i find this a toxic, robotic culture and if these are the people in there then i would have a terrible time finding some buddy engineer or some helpful senior.
- negetive : most probably a bad wlb : i worked for an year for a fast paced b2c edtech startup. no matter how old these are , b2c are always shipping new stuff and are therefore hectic. i don't like the boredom here but i would miss the free time to workout :(
so ... any thoughts about it?4