Employer: "You know Html5 and Css3??

Me: "Of course! And Javascript."

Employer: "GREAT! We develope WordPress."

Me: 😊😊😊👋💣

Client: "I need css3 html5 jQuery based fluid and responsive design UI with d3.js charts..."

Me: which browsers do u have...?

Client: oh for security reasons we only allow IE6 and we have Win XP OS only...

Me: So how closely are u related to Donald Trump..??

👍👍😂😂

"How would you like your coffee Sir?" Lmaooo

A Java Development vacancy I came across today:

Requirements:

Must:

° Appropriate Education
° Work Experience with Java/Javascript knowledge, at least 2 years, good understanding of OOP, patterns
° Experience with Spring, NoSQL(MongoDB)

Preferably:

° Experience with Tomcat/Jboss/Glassfish
° JDBC, JSF, JSP, JSTL, Angular, ExtJS
° HTML5, CSS3, XML, Jquery, Bootstrap, Primefaces
° Hibernate
° Git/SVN

Objective:

° Implementation of specific requirements
° Cooperation with business analytics and clarification of reuirements
° Participation in the development of application architecture and technology selection

Who are they hiring?

My Boss: Let's do single page web but we wont use any framework.

And yes, how fuck I ended up myself with almost half 10k of lines.

Once it really hit me hard. The father of my brothers wife once told me that I'm not fit for IT in general. He thinks that I have pseudo knowledge of IT and Programming.

He just works parttime at home as "computer scientist" and sells routers, pc and such stuff to some private customers. Before he used Filemaker and sayd that he already coded his own CRM with it.

When he said that it really made me sad. But after we talked I looked back what I already achieved:

1. I build for me and friends custom PC's with Case mods and Hard Tube watercooling
2. I can programm in HTML5, CSS3 and PHP
3. I raised a Community with over 60 people in it. We got 2 dedicated Linux Roots (I7-6700K, 64GB RAM, SSD)
4. I manage the Linux Servers on my own with VoIP, Mail-, Web-, MySQL- and Gameservers
5. I built up a complete Community Solution with Game Groups, Forum, Tournament System and a lot of custom scripts.
6. Now Im almost finished learning the C++ Basics to code and manage to learn the beginning of GUI/UX programming.
7. Next thing Im gonna learn is Javascript (Browser) and Java, so I can complete my Web Skills and also can code Java Desktop Apps and Java game plugins (don't rant, Javascript is not the same as Java, I know 😉)

So I thought to myself "maybe in the eyes of others Im not a computer scientist, but then Im on the way to be one at least"

But please dont be a douche (the father) and prejudice me, before you don't know what I already can and achieved.

Just because you're are selling computer parts and installing them doesn't mean, that you are a computer scientist and telling me that I'm not 😉

In IT you're the smith of your own merit!

>> this === rant
<< true

At beginning of this year, I only knew HTML, JS, and CSS so I just applied for offers like "Jr Apprentice Dev in Front-End"
In a interview call, the woman told me that they will send me a test asking about my JS and HTML5 knowledge.
When I look in my inbox, the mail subject says "Back-end Test".

Then I call the woman:

Me: "Hello, I have received the test mail, but maybe it's wrong. I applied for a Front-End position and the test is about backend! "

She: "Do you have skills in JS and HTML5?"

Me: "Yes!, and CSS3"

She: "Well, the test is about that. JS, jQuery, and HTML5"

Me: "..."

Me: "Sorry, that languages are Front-End. In the subject say 'Back-End' and Back-End is PHP, SQL, MySQL, Java, .Net... I don't know nothing about that. I only know HTML, JS, CSS."

She: "It's the same"

Me: "I sorry but it's not the same. Fron-End is client-side, what users sees. Animation, colors, FXs, buttons, forms... And Back-End is server-side, what users doesn't see."

She: "Well, JS, HTML, and CSS is backend for us. We call it that way too"

Me: "Sorry but that is wrong. I invite you to read some basic info. Now I am confused"

Of course that I am not confused. That idi0t was wrong.
Perhaps recruiters should take some info about areas where they are recruiting... (:T)

My boss said to me to make an E-commerce website.
I make E-commerce website within a month. All coding done by me no CMS only (HTML5, Bootstrap, CSS3, etc)

Boss: You wasted 1 month in this single website. You should do this within a week.
Me: 😠 But... (Fuck you, You Asshole) (in my mind).

Me: Sorry, next time I'll do it within a day.
Boss: 😂😂😂😂

So Im making my best friend (which is a girl) a website. I'm not a pro at it so please don't roast me. I am self taught and still learning. A few opinion and ideas would hurt ? K:

My first ever post! So awesome to find out dev rant and cheer up my day as I go thru everyone's story/rant.

I was single the whole time while I'm at school. After graduated, I finally pick up the pace to date girls. So I signed up for a few online dating sites/apps. Every single time that I create a new profile for the app/site, I always get frustrated and confused about the language field. Especially when there's only selector or check box for languages selections.

Like, where's JavaScript, PHP, HTML5, Css3, Ruby, on the selector or check box. I think a suggestions to those dating site/app dev needs to rethink the options for language selections. At least try to let us developers have a better profile than normal people! :-/

So started job hunting and stumbled upon this
1. Skill required in PHP, Laravel, CakePHP, Wordpress, Opencart.

2. Bootstrap, CSS3 and HTML5 experience preferred.

3. JQuery, Vue.js, Angular.js, JavaScript, AJAX, HTML experience highly preferred.

and will pay 8000Rs/Month (112.88 USD)

Do they even know what they want? and at what cost they want to hire?

I had this weird dream(emphasis on dream)

I was in a resort in bali waiting for my drinks and this cute girl comes over to my table.

Me : omg finally i can get a girlfriend
Me : hello beautiful
Her : hey i have this problem with my website *shows the messed up site with no divisions/containers * "can you fix this?"
Me : okay ;_;

PS : i started learning css, html and 2 other web technologies a week ago, and this is already happening to me, should i quit?

So my church has ask me to do their website (: kinda excited haven't done a project like this in a while

When your designation is 'Senior Software Engineer' and all you are doing is HTML and CSS bug fixes :|

Hi I'm a web developer ❤ and you are? 😊

"The role: You will be designing and building responsive emails on a daily basis using HTML5/ CSS3/JavaScript"

Errrrrrrmmmm...

Why is web development such a headache?

I'm writing a responsive wesbite from scratch. All goes perfect, even cross browser.
It all works, adapts to screen size etc. Nice! About to get this code into production.

Me: I'll test the iPhone 5 viewport size before I push the code...

Responsive Developer Tools:

FireFox: nu uh, there's a magic random 1px margin to every element on your page now, which you cannot find in your css or in the computed tab. It's magical.

Me: weird, what if I change the viewport size to the iPhone 6's dimensions?

Issue persists.

Me: hmm, what if I add or substract one fucking pixel from the viewport width or height?

FireFox: What 1px margin? Don't know what you're talking about ... There never was one...

Me: ok, weird (sets viewport size back to the iPhone 5 format for testing)

FireFox: I present to you: the magic random 1px margin.

I'm at a loss. I really am. Been clicking and unclicking almost every responsive part of my css I could find for this page and it just doesn't want to work persistently. And I swear to god that it worked a week ago in that exact viewport size. It's so frustrating.

As I already said on devrant, I'm a freelance web developer and I also often sell my services for teaching, loving that. Currently I'm teaching PHP with 30 students and it's going very well.

But yesterday, I received an offer for giving another course next month, this time on HTML and CSS, for a company I don't know yet. Almost every line of this email is wrong, outdated by 20 years, or just basically meaningless...

So I thought I could do my best to translate this as close as possible to the original, preserving the wrong formulations too, just for you devranters fellas.

"Hello,

I have an offer for a 2 days course for 5 people (level 1+ and/or 2), on HTML5 and CSS3. Below, the program :

1. XHTML AND CSS2 INTRODUCTION

Advantages and benefits of change

Understanding compatibility for different versions of browsers

HTML, XHTML, CSS edition tools : presentation of the different tools

The CSS language : different types of selectors : class of selector, identifier of selector, contextual selectors, grouped selectors

Blocks of text, boxes of text

The CSS1, CSSP, CSS2 properties

Relative and absolute measures units

2. LAYOUT TECHNIQUES

Full CSS, XHTML websites demo

Positioning with the position property, positioning with the float property

Columns creation

Layout for forms

Layout for data tables

Layout for menus

3. INTRODUCTION TO SVG (SCALABLE VECTOR GRAPHICS)

Role and importance of SVG

Using SVG on client side : basic shapes

SVG structure of document, tags examples

Using CSS styles with SVG

Different integration methods for SVG in a XHTML document

4. OPTIMISATION OF JAVASCRIPT CODE

Introduction to DOM and Javascript

Access to document objects : different access techniques, using this keyword, create elements dynamically

Positioning elements with the help of Javascript : positionning elements relatively to the mouse, move elements

Show/hide elements for creating hierarchical menus

Code optimisation techniques : using objects, objects litterals, loops optimisation

Can you please give me your availability ?"

Seriously...

CSS-fucking-1 ! Is it a course for dinosaurs ?

...And if only my rant was just about the program...

It's totally impossible to cover all these subjects in only 2 days with people of different levels and experience.

The guy exactly said to me : "don't worry about the program, it's an old text but they agreed to it anyway. They just want to learn HTML and CSS, some of them already know it but want to learn more, and the others are total beginers.".

And here is the meaning for the "(level 1+ and/or 2)" part in the email.

So... Surprizingly, I accepted the offer, but asked for at least a 3rd day. I'm waiting for their answer, but I'll do it anyway, adapting the course content to the actual students knowledge. I need the money, after all.

Wish me luck...

It's just sad that these formation companies are selling bullshit to clients that just want to learn something useful. It's too often like that, they sell shitty/useless programs and we have to catch up in real time with students that don't understand why they don't learn what was told to them.

When you don't have wifi, but you don't need Wi-Fi to make/play a game with html5, JavaScript, and css3 (;

"Web" Teacher wanted us to learn horribly outdated html in the middle of web2.0 wave.

HTML5 ? CSS3 ? nope.
No CSS at all, and longest part of the class was on the importance of prehistoric HTML doctypes.

Capitalized tags, tables, BGCOLOR attributes...

Like she scrapped everything on W3schools...

When your front-end slice is outsourced and almost everything is float:left;
#floatallthethings #youredoingitwrong

Second day at work ✌

Just started a website without drawing the template first. What could possibly go wrong..

so i decided to do some benchmarks for chrome and firefox hypetum ...

TLDR : chromes kicks ass sometimes half the time it takes ff to run some benchmarks.

HTML5/CSS3 support is also better in chrome. overall chrome looks to be the best.

if you're a privacy nut i suppose you won't give a shit but yeah overhyped.

finished making website and all its features work across Chrome, Safari, and even IE11 and Edge..... but not Firefox... been like this for the last 3 sites that I have done. Mostly CSS3 related. Some CSS3 hacks are required for that browser... why are you the odd one out now Firefox??? That used to be the job of IEs!!!

Most of us have scary stories about professors that think that they know about what they are talking about when it comes to teaching comp sci subjects. Shit is so backwards in most parts of the world with teachers showing outdated or completely pointless tech.

A friend called me the other day asking for classic ASP help because it was being used in his web class. Another was asking me about flipping c cgi web scripting. Wtf are schools teaching? Having the drive to LEARN actuall useful topics that are relevant on the market is hard enough as it is...shouldn't schools help at least a little bit? I was lucky, we were thaught Java, Python, cpp, js, sql, html5, css3, php, ruby and we had classes for node (for those interested) and asp.net mvc. Those were RELEVANT and good classes and while some outdated tech was good the rest is just bullshit. Specially since most teachers have 0 market value as develpers...but hey!! Wtf do I know! Of course my word is shit against all them doctorate and master degrees.

Gimme a break. School can be great. But a lot of the leadership there is toxic af for our industry. And while I appreciate the effort in me being thaught modern languages (and thaught is a hard word since I already knew how to program way before going to school) i still remember a teacher taking points away from an assignment for not using switch statements in Python...despite my explaining that there was no such thing (you can go around it by using a lil technique using functions, its pretty cool..pero no mames)
Or what about the time I mentioned to a fellow student how he could use markup for having more control with his windows forms while the very same teacher contradicted me saying that shit was not possible. Or the guy at the school in which I work teaching intro to programming using fucking vba...fk man if you are going the BASIC route at least teach them b4j or something fuuuuck.

I had good teachers, but they were always cast asside by dptmnt heads as if they knew better. I just hate pendejo teachers I really do.

Chinguen a su madre, bola de babosos.

To the web devs here: What resources would you recommend for catching up a little to the web development state of the art? The last time I have designed anything HTML5/CSS3 were just being introduced. So my knowledge is pretty outdated, but I'm note starting from zero. I'm looking for some best practices and something framework-agnostic would be nice. Unless you say “Dude it's 2017, nobody even boils water without using *.js”, of course.

Does anyone use WYSIWYG editors when doing bootstrap websites anymore or just straight notepad++ (I've been doing the latter, wondering if I'm missing a trend)

"I know HTML5 and CSS3"

Is it anyone else's experience that when people claim to know HTML[5] and CSS[3] they usually know neither HTML nor CSS well enough to be of any use?

Myself, I know HTML4.01Transitional//EN

!rant
TL;DR: New(-ish) dev looking for advice to improve workflow and new languages. Hopefully worth a read though :)

Newbie developer here, I took a web applications development class this year since I could take that at another campus rather than do general education courses at my home school, and I have learned and earned a CIW Certification for HTML5, CSS3, and JavaScript, though I know the certificates do squat if I can't apply myself to them, and I have learned PHP and MySQL.

I want to learn more, technically-applicable languages.

My setup is barebones (to a Linux diehard's eyes), with a gaming laptop that I do a lot of workstation stuff on, an RPi 3 B that I do some Linux-y stuff on, and a less-powerful Development Laptop (that I call a devtop) that I occasionally do work away from home on.

I'm sure most will cringe and weep at my workflow, as I use Windows 10 on both systems and the standard NOOBS software on the pi, and I use Brackets as my text editor, as well as the XAMPP AMP stack for testing.

My biggest questions are what could I do to improve my workflow, and what languages should I learn/apply myself to for real-world application (such as Node.js for live-updating server-side applications or C# for Windows applications)?

Thank you for taking the time to read this, any feedback is helpful! I'm just a high school student with a lot of enthusiasm for development!

Hey guys.
So, got tired of trying to learn on top of the knee (Portuguese expression) and decided to do some courses to get the basics.
Where do you recommend I go?
1. Course must be free
2. Not over 100 hours per course (I'll have 1 to 2 hours a day if I really focus on it)

What I need:
Language (lvl of knowledge)
- Python (know the basics) + kivy (basics)
- Html (good) + css (basics) + javascript (basics)
- node.js (0)
- Jquery ( 0 ) + Django (0)

I know there's lots of good courses out there and lots of dumb stupid ones, care to give your opinion? Thank you

Urgh.. the amount of things you have to know as a developer.. it can get stressful and frustrating sometimes when (in-depth) technology knowledge is demanded from you (for instance, for a job position)..
It's like being a doctor, being a lifelong student.

A few examples of what I had to know during my career:
Java, .NET, Python, PHP, JavaScript/HTML5/CSS3, Sass/Less, Node.js, ReactJS, AngularJS, Vue.js, Cordova, Ionic, Android, design patterns, SOLID, databases (design, implementation, administration, both NoSQL and relational,..), deployment tools (Octopus, Jenkins,..), VCS, CI/CD, HTTP, networking, security (OAuth2, CORS, XSS, CSRF,..), algebra, algorithms, software testing, profiling, Linux, Unix, Windows, MS Office (advanced mail filtering,..), ITIL, IT Law (licensing and its implications when choosing a product, distribution right,..), server architecture,..

Sure yeah, I know, I've studied all that at university but.. it's been too long (almost a decade now). I have to revisit that knowledge.

I live in Sweden and want some new dev stickers. Checked redbubble.com but I'm not willing to pay $25 for 12 small stickers. Even with free shipping. Anyone know a cheaper alternative?

I need

-ES6
-JS
-HTML5
-CSS3
-ReactJS
-Angular JS
-git
-PHP
-VSCode
-Photoshop
-Node.js
-npm

Damn you Chrome, piece of shit who doesn't support (without breaking completely the layout) the <object> tag inside a flexbox container. Wasted two hours of my life.

for me, the most interesting project I''ve worked on was 4 years ago for a beer company.
it was a facebook app developed in HTML (not html5), jQuery & jQuery hi, php, imagick, ffmpeg, & YouTube library.
for the Euro Cup, users had elements to drag and drop on a stage, add frames, dialog boxes, and create a 15 second animated story board. all positions of these elements along with the frames where sent server side to create images of each frame (rendering fronts and positioning), then combining them using ffmpeg to generate a video.
these videos were later uploaded on the client's YouTube channel.

this project was awesome, knowing css3 and html5 were prohibited to use due to cross browser compatibility. it was ban exercise on all levels :)

Hey, Do you think it's common to get an interview take-home test like this...

Write a Python script that:- Downloads the Equity bhavcopy zip from the above page- Extracts and parses the CSV file in it- Writes the records into Redis into appropriate data structures(Fields: code, name, open, high, low, close)
Write a simple CherryPy python web application that:- Renders an HTML5 + CSS3 page that lists the top 10 stock entries from the Redis DB in a table- Has a searchbox that lets you search the entries by the 'name' field in Redis and renders it in a table- Make the page look nice!

Commit the code to Github. Host the application on AWS or Heroku or a similar provider and share both the links.

need to work on any open source projects. I am a Java developer and have knowledge of Android, HTML5,CSS3 and SQL as well. Anyone willing to onboard me shout out.

Is it ok to be a web developer or web designer but not good in math? Thanks for the Help..

I learnt how to code, first, on code.org. Then on codecademy. There I learnt the basics of HTML5/CSS3, Javascript, Ruby and Ruby on Rails. I also began buying booking on J Query.

Started to use "Lost" instead of "Jeet" but got "Lost" in all the possible you have...

Clearfix in CSS is just LIFESTYLE.. Thx God for gave us that. Hahaha no ;D

Any tips for a better responsive design?

I recently joined a project team in my company whose client is a BIG (and I mean BIG) tech company.

We offer marketing solutions to the client. This means we create websites that showcase the company and all the good stuff that they do.

When I was going through my ramp-up meetings, my lead gave me some dummy projects to build just to get an idea of where I stood as a web developer.

So, it was one of those Photoshop mockups that were to be made entirely using vanilla JS, CSS3, HTML5 and nothing else.

There came many points where I had to align items either horizontally or vertically. So, I used flexbox to do it.

I submitted my code to the lead and while going through it, he commented, "Why do you use flexbox? It is no good. Use float instead." And I looked at him in utter confusion.

Tell me, is it wrong to use flexbox? Should I have used float instead?

I learned Python3, HTML5, CSS3, JavaScript and Bootstrap 4. I also did some web design project. But I think I need more practice for being a good programmer. Now, I need A platform that will give me some design or programming exercises for practicing. The platform can be any website or android app. I don't looking for something that will say, "design a calendar or make a calculator" or something like that. I'm looking for more specific task. Example for html:- I need all tags and attribute based task. so that I can learn everything properly. something that will say do the array task in JavaScript, do the h1 task in html. I want to see the result of an exercise if I failed in that exercise. So that I can learn from there. I want to make sure that the exercise will cover all topic of that language. so that I can learn everything topic of a language.

IF YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT KIND OF APP OR WEBSITE THEN PLEASE HELP ME. I'M NEW IN PROGRAMMING.

Any good free HTML5-CSS3 visualization tool for Java Swing?
I did my research and gave up (tried 3, 1 was paid and 2 didn't work) ended up using JFreeChart, but the Grid Bag Layout is giving me some headaches, if you have any idea, you're welcome.

This post is going to be long and it might not be the platform to ask for it's mainly for ranting yet I wanted to ask a non toxic community.
I'm mainly an ABAP programmer working on an SAP system for my living. No matter how people inside the SAP sphere look at it, it's not exactly cutting edge technology in the world of software development. (and in my opinion it's not even a knife)
As I work in an enterprise environment I have trouble about finding gaps where I can learn newer technologies and thus, I've decided to learn in my free time.
I tend to tilt toward web development as do many I know because I see potential in the GUI which HTML and CSS achieve. And I do believe that combining that with languages such as JS, Python, Ruby, Erlang and Elixir can give way to a healthy experience both in Web development and even desktop development.
In order to avoid overwhelming myself I wish to start with learning web development. Time is not of the essence because I plan to continue working with ABAP for close future, around the next 2 years, and I'm young.
I wanted to ask the community, is there any developer in here that was in the same position and can give out some pointers to the path they took? Is it wise to start my path from HTML5 and CSS3 without looking back to the older ways? Any resource you'd share will be welcomed.