They call it $5/gb hotel wifi, i call it free uncapped 100meg fibre because your security sucks

Oh and they host their entire POS (and database with backups) on the same network accessible to every TV in the hotel

My coworker wanted to get some program from a website that requires a username/password to download. It is a utility program for controls automation. He didn't want to have to create a username/password so I said he could use mine.

I went over to his desk and read off the username to him which he entered. Then I started reading off the "password" to him:
"y o u r m o m i s a s l u t"
He got suspicious at the last few letters and then clicked on "show password" icon. He of course saw: "yourmomisaslut". At this point he just bust out laughing. I then gave him the correct password.

Ed is responsible for servers in the IT department at work. He is an electrical that does a lot of electronic/electrical design work. So IT concerns are not as high as his design work. Today we had a server fail due to aging hardware. We have another guy that handles IT stuff for Ed. So I went to the IT guy and said:

So I understand the server has Electronic Dysfunction. Is Ed having trouble keeping his server up?

Dark Humor

Lets try some seriously dark dark humor. Lets find what lurks in the hearts of men.

My Kid: I was adopted.
Me: We wouldn't have picked you.

Oedipus: <whilst banging his wife> You remind me of my mom.

What do you call Rock Hudson in a wheelchair?
Rollaids

What did Christa McAuliffe say to her husband before the launch?
You feed the dog, I will feed the fish.

Some I found from searching web:

What's worse than a baby in a dumpster?
A baby in 2 dumpsters.

If we had mosquito nets in Africa we could save millions of mosquitos from getting AIDS.

Down syndrome in military is called special forces.

Mom told me to eat my vegetables, now where do I put the wheelchairs.

Whoever thought white men can't jump obviously never watched the 9/11 footage.

Well, its been a ride folks!

Images images images!

So there is this discussion about killing children in code. Someone pops in with this:
"I do remember a post from a guy who actually got pulled into an HR talk, to ask why he'd littered the code with references to killing children and removing children from their parents. Imagine trying to explain to a person who's never programmed, that Kill(parent.child)is a perfectly standard phrasing and not a latent psychosis that should be reported to the police."

First I think who is the idiot that reported this? Then I think who is the HR idiot that didn't do a google search or talk to the software manager? So many people had to fail at basic thinking for this to get this far.

Then I think also. Two things can be true at the same time. The person writing this code could also harbor latent desires to kill children. But can hide their sickness in plain sight. CS could just be a place for psychopaths to talk about the true serial killer thoughts.

I was wondering what this would look like. Maybe the psycho programmer will allocate extra hidden children that will get created and destroyed without anyone knowing the better. Maybe they only need 10 children for the code, but they allocate 100. That is 90 children they can create and destroy that only they know about.

Is balancing a tree really about cycles to read the data? Or is this some sort of karma balancing with latent desires to add or remove children with different karma leanings? Linked lists? Obviously only a psychopath would make a singly linked list.

Then I read posts on devrant and think there is probably at least one psychopath here that looks up to Anakin. We know you are here! You can't hide forever.

If Javascript were a cereal.
(Yes, I realize how cursed this is. Been learning to make images with chatgpt.)

Make Tide Pods Great Again

So my towns 4th of July parade got rained on. It became the largest wet t-shirt contest I have ever seen.

It got a lot better toward the end as the rain let up. It ended up being a lot of fun this year. No sun burns either.

No to crapple, yes to snapple.

I feel like working with embedded compilers is like working in the dark ages sometimes. I end up doing things that are like black magic to just make things work:

union {
float infloat;
uint32_t outint;
} puneit;

As long as the compiler supports C99 this is supposed to work. I think even if you are using it as a C++ compiler. There is also no way for us to get a compiler from the vendor for our embedded chips to do this the C++ 20 way:

float ieee_float(uint32_t f)
{
return std::bit_cast<float>(f);
}

I am not even sure if the compiler I am using is C++ 11 compatible.

edit: okay, it supports C++ 11

Interviewer: What do you want to be doing in 5 years?
Me: Your Mom