Girlfriend: What's your biggest fear?

Me: That machines take over the world.

Girlfriend: What?

Toaster: What?

Got assigned an intern to mentor him, with an explicit order not to do any of the legwork for him.

We start out with some fuzzy requirements. Intern starts overengineering a generic solution, so I make out a best architecture that conforms to the business requirements and I explain it to the intern why are we going to use such approach and tell him how we are going to do it in three phases.

I explain the intern the first phase, break it down in small tasks for him and return to my projects...

After a couple of days of no words from the intern, I decide to check up on him to see how is he progressing, only to hear him complaining the task is boring. So, instead of doing the assigned tasks, he decided he should do a "design" for a feature I told him explicitly not to do, since it is going to be designed by the design team later on.

I explain it to the intern that we have to do the boring task first because we can't proceed with the next phase of the implementation without the necessary data from the phase one.

Intern says okay and assures me he got it now. Few days later, I check up on him, and he tells me he feels he is doing all the work and that I don't contribute to the project. I call up my boss and tell him intern wants a meeting. Since I was working from home, I quickly pack my things and head to the office. Boss talks to the intern before I managed to get to the office. Once I got there, I meet the intern, and he tells me everything is okay. I ask what did the boss say to make things okay all of a sudden, and he tells me he said we are a team now. Our company has a flat hierarchy model, so he tells me he doesn't feel he needs a mentor, that we are both equal, and that I have no idea how to work in a team, and then proceeds to comfort me on how human interaction is hard and that I will learn it one day... I was like wtf?

I tell him to finish the phase one of the project and start with the phase two, and I leave home again.

I call up my boss and ask him what did he say to the intern, and he says: "nothing much, just explained the project a little bit and how it fits in the grand scheme of things.". I ask about the equal team members thing, and me not being a mentor any longer, the boss goes wtf, saying he never said anything about that to him.

So the kid can't focus on a single task, over-engineers everything and doesn't feel he can learn anything from developers with more experience, doesn't want to obey commands, and also likes to lie to manipulate others.

Tomorrow we'll decide what to do with him...

Sorry for the long rant, it was a long stressful day.

I am so glad that i learned at middleschool how to use excel😂

Every time when I have nothing to do...

I was 15 years old and the first year of high school. Everything was new to me and I was such a newbie. At that time I had 2-3 year of programming behind me at an institution where they taught competitive programming. And I knew something about computers. Not much but more than most of my school mates. At that time I wanted to become "super cool hacker".

So we had this very very thought teacher for history which was also our form master. She really knows how to explained everything about history and in an interesting way. But while she was teaching we also had to write down notes from her powerpoints that were on a projector. And occasionally she would wait for us to copy everything and then move on with her lecture. But sometimes she didn't. This was frustrating as hell. The whole class would complain about this because you couldn't take notes down normal, you had to do it at double speed.

But she got one weak spot. She was not very good with computers. Our school computers were locked in some kinda closet so that students didn't have physical access to a computer and were also password protected. So I came up with the plan to plant wireless mouse in her computer so that I could control her mouse. At that time it seemed like SUPER HACKER MASTER PLAN.

So I got an opportunity one time when she left the classroom and let closet where the computer was open. I quickly sneaked the USB of the wireless mouse in the computer and then go back to the seat.

So THE FUN began.

Firstly I would only go back in powerpoint so that all my schoolmates could write down notes including me. And it was hilarious to watch when she didn't know what is happening. So then I would move her mouse when she tried to close some window. I would just move it slightly so she wouldn't notice that somebody else is controlling mouse. And by missing X button just by slight she would click other things and other things would pop up and now she had to close this thing so it became a nightmare for her. And she would become angry at the mouse and start complaining how the computer doesn't work and that mouse doesn't obey her.

One time when she didn't pay attention to her computer and projector I went to paint program and drew a heart and wrote we love you (In Slovenian Imamo vas radi -> See the picture below) and one of my school mates has the picture of it. We were all giggling and she didn't know what is was for. And I managed to close everything before she even noticed.

So it got to the point where she couldn't hand it more so she called our school IT guy so that he would check her computer (2 or 3 weeks passed before she called IT guy). And he didn't find anything. He was really crappy IT guy in general. So one week passed by and I still had messed with her mouse. So she got a replacement computer. Who would guessed all the problems went away (because I didn't have another mouse like that). I guess when our IT guy took the computer to his room and really thoroughly check it he found my USB.

So he told her what was the problem she was so pissed off really I didn't see her pissed off so much in all my 4 years in high school. She demanded the apology from whom did it. And at that moment my mind went through all possible scenarios... And the most likely one was that I was going to be expelled... And I didn't have the balls to say that I did it and I was too afraid... Thanks to God nobody from my school mates didn't tell that it was me.

While she waited that somebody would come forward there was one moment when our looks met and at that moment both of us knew that I was the one that did it.

Next day the whole class wrote the apology letter and she accepted it. But for the rest of 4 years whenever was there a problem with the computer I had to fixed it and she didn't trust anybody not even our IT guy at school. It was our unwritten contract that I would repair her computer to pay off my sin that I did. And she once even trusted me with her personal laptop.

So to end this story I have really high respect for her because she is a great teacher and great persons that guide me through my teen years. And we stayed in contact.

He is right cause PHP is one of the best known programming languages😂

Finally i got my rasperry pi 😊

On the first class of cryptography professor says, "Hackers are people who dropped out of school, didn't obey their parents and turned to drugs and alcohol and steal money from people by hacking their facebook."

Then goes on to say, "People tend to keep their birthdate as their debit card's PIN so hacker checks their facebook account, finds their birthdate and goes to ATM machine and hacks their bank account."

I was speechless.

So a guy wants to start a company with me. He wants to be CEO 👨‍💼 I'm fine with it but now he also wants me to obey every one of his orders such as attend long unplanned meetings, go do market research, code the app and for what, a mere 5%. He gets a bigger cut of the income because he came up with the idea 💡, he also gets to sit and order me around because he's read a few books on business and economics. People don't seem to understand the difference between having an idea and implementation. I just left and said no to every offer he had the highest of which was 10%, don't be worried about the money he says this is a real opportunity for you. I mean wtf is wrong with some people.

Yesterday I tried to put my pc into sleep mode but ... UPDATES

To all the design pattern nazis..

Don't you ever tell me that something is impossible because it violates some design pattern! Those design principles are there to make your life easier, not something you have to obey by law.
Don't get me wrong, you should where ever possible respect those best practices, because it keeps your software maintainable.
But your software should foremost solve real world problems and real world problems can be far more complex than any design pattern could address. So there are cases where you can consciously decide to disregard a best practice in order to provide value to the world.

Thanks for reading if you got this far.

Before you start to code write your ideas on a piece of paper ... Everytime I beginn a project I start with coding, this advice is to difficult for me 😂

Yeah it's italic

MOTHERFUCKING WINDOWS 10. YOU COCKROACH COCK SUCKING PIECE OF AQUAMAN'S LEFT NUT.

If I put you in hibernation I do NOT want you to WAKE THE FUCK UP WHEN ITS AROUND THAT TIME A NIGHT WHEN TEEN WOLF IS SPREADING HIS STD'S TO DIAMOND-SKINNED DOUCHEBAGS. (Middle of the night)
AND WAKE ME BECAUSE OF YOUR SOUND AND LIGHT.

Goddamnit how hard is it to let a computer hibernate, but no, they had to add shit functions that makes it update itself or something in the middle of the night.

I'm going to tear the functions out of your retro ass till you will fucking obey my every command. You will fucking hibernate when I say so till when I say so or I'll replace you with linux

Visual Studio wasn't responding and I wanted to close it via task manager ... But as I clicked the button "close task" task manager wasn't responding😭

Christmas lights were blinking randomly IN SECTIONS without any sort of "control brick", just with a plain wall plug and TWO wires coming out of it.

In this house we obey the laws of physics, I immediately called magic on this and started digging. I found out that was like five chains of lights wired in parallel, and every chain contained one special lamp that had a thin plate of some thermal-sensitive material inside. It heats up which makes it go straight, thus breaking its chain until it cools down enough to curl again and make the contacts touch.

Brilliant and really cheap way of making randomly blinking Christmas lights without any kind of controller, with just two wires and some physics. That's what I call "nocode".

Everyone is posting a picture about his linux desktop, so I will post a picture of my windows desktop because...

...it's opposite day

Please. Hear me out.

I've been doing frontend for six years already. I've been a junior dev, then in was all up to the CTO. I've worked for very small companies. Also, for the very large ones. Then, for huge enterprises. And also for startups. I've been developing for IE5.5, just for fun. I've done all kinds of stuff — accessibility, responsive design (with or without breakpoints), web components, workers, PWA, I've used frameworks from Backbone to React. My favourite language is CSS, and you probably know it. The bottom line is, you name it — I did it.

And, I want to say that Safari is a very good browser.

It's very fast. Especially on M1 Macs. Yes, it lacks customization and flexibility of Firefox, but general people, not developers, like to use it. Also, Safari is very important — Apple is a huge opposing force to Google when it comes to web standards. When Google pushes their BS like banning ad blockers, Apple never moves an inch. If we lose Safari, you'll notice.

As for the Safari-specific bugs situation, well… To me, Safari serves as a very good indicator: if your website breaks in Safari, chances are you used some hacks that are no good. Safari is a good litmus test I use to find the parts of my code that could've been better.

The only Safari-specific BUG I encountered was a blurry black segment in linear gradients that go from opaque to transparent. So, instead of linear-gradient(#f00, transparent), just do linear-gradient(#f00f, #f000).

This is the ONLY bug I encountered. Every single time my website broke in Safari other than that, was for some ugly hack I used.

You don't have to love it. I don't even use it, my browser of choice is Firefox. But, I'm grateful to Safari, just because it exists. Why? Well, if Safari ceases to exist, Google will just leave both W3C and WhatWG, and declare they'll be doing things their way from now on. Obey or die.

Firefox alone is just not big enough. But, together with Safari, they oppose Google's tyranny in web standards game.

Google will declare the victory and will turn the web into an authoritarian dictatorship. No ad blockers will be allowed. You won't be able to block Google's trackers. Google already owns the internet, well, almost, and this will be their final, devastating victory.

But Safari is the atlas that keeps the web from destruction.

The brief history of Facebook open source:
- FB releases React under an oppressive licence that tells "woopsie, can't sue FB if you use React"
- a lot of money goes into making React popular to gain leverage from mass adoption
- VMware bans React in their company
- FB releases Flux to bring state management. It flops. Replaced by what some Russian student wrote in several evenings (Redux)
- Preact is released. It's faster than React, and it has MIT licence. Vue beats React in GitHub stars.
- Under mass pressure, FB changes React's licence to MIT. Initial plan to gain leverage fails spectacularly.
- FB releases Flow Types. It flops. Replaced by TypeScript.
- FB releases their own app market for React Native. It flops.
- FB releases Relay. It flops. Replaced by Apollo.
- FB tries to push React.Suspense for the whole JS landscape to obey and comply to how it works. Community says "Fuck You".
- FB releases react-native-web. It flops.
- Web Components are out in all browsers, adopted as a standard. React doesn't support them.
- Google releases Lit, a virtual DOM framework on top of Web Components to fuck with React. It's a massive success.
- React 18 is out. Still no Web Components support.
- (you are here)

Craziest bug, not so much in the sense of what it was (although it was itself wacky too), but in what I went through to fix it.

The year was 1986. I was finishing up coding on a C64 demo that I had promised would be out on a specific weekend. I had invented a new demo effect for it, which was pretty much the thing we all tried to do back then because it would guarantee a modicum of "fame", and we were all hyper-ego driven back then :) So, I knew I wanted to have it perfect when people saw it, to maximize impressiveness!

The problem was that I had this ONE little pixel in the corner of the screen that would cycle through colors as the effect proceeded. A pixel totally apart from the effect itself. A pixel that should have been totally inactive the entire time as part of a black background.

A pixel that REALLY pissed me off because it ruined the utter perfection otherwise on display, and I just couldn't have that!

Now, back then, all demos were coded in straight Assembly. If you've ever done anything of even mild complexity in Assembly, then you know how much of a PITA it can be to find bugs sometimes.

This one was no exception.

This happened on a Friday, and like I said, I promised it for the weekend. Thus began my 53 hours of hell, which to this day is still the single longest stretch of time straight that I've stayed awake.

Yes, I spent literally over 2+ days, sitting in front of my computer, really only ever taking bio breaks and getting snacks (pretty sure I didn't even shower)... all to get one damn pixel to obey me. I would conquer that f'ing pixel even if it killed me in the process!

And, eventually, I did fix it. The problem?

An 'i' instead of an 'l'. I shit you not!

After all these years I really don't remember the details, except for the big one that sticks in my mind, that I had an 'i' character in some line of code where an 'l' should have been. I just kept missing it, over and over and over again. I mean, I kinda understand after many hours, your brain turns to mush. and you make more mistakes, so I get missing it after a while... but missing it early on when I was still fresh just blows my mind.

As I recall, I finally uploaded the demo to the distro sight at around 11:30pm, so at least I made my deadline before practically dropping dead in bed (and then having to get up for school the next morning- D'oh!). And it WAS a pretty impressive demo... though I never did get the fame I expected from it (most likely because it didn't get distributed far and wide enough).

And that's the story of what I'd say was my craziest bug ever, the one that probably came closest to killing me :)

Reach the 5000++

I hate this guys in my class who are asking me for a solution for the programming homework but they don't even try to solve it by their own...😔

I can you about one really annoying coworker: Me.

The first thing I did as a sysadmim was to break my colleague's rc helicopter. After that I decided to learn Python, pestering him with questions once every two minutes. I developed, using the word loosely, some scripts that I wrote directly on the production servers, with predictable results.

After a while, I broke less things than I fixed. I learned a lot those years. Today I'm still amazed by the patience and knowledge of this guy; I owe most of my career to him.

These days I have a brilliant job stopping morons such as myself from breaking to many things. I try to be as patient and I hope to be as knowledgeable.

> Worst work culture you've experienced?

It's a tie between my first to employers.

First: A career's dead end.
Bosses hardly ever said the truth, suger-coated everything and told you just about anything to get what they wanted. E.g. a coworker of mine was sent on a business trip to another company. They had told him this is his big chance! He'd attend a project kick-off meeting, maybe become its lead permanently. When he got there, the other company was like "So you're the temporary first-level supporter? Great! Here's your headset".

And well, devs were worth nothing anyway. For every dev there were 2-3 "consultants" that wrote detailed specifications, including SQL statements and pseudocode. The dev's job was just to translate that to working code. Except for the two highest senior devs, who had perfect job security. They had cooked up a custom Ant-based build system, had forked several high-profile Java projects (e.g. Hibernate) and their code was purposely cryptic and convoluted.
You had no chance to make changes to their projects without involuntarily breaking half of it. And then you'd have to beg for a bit of their time. And doing something they didn't like? Forget it. After I suggested to introduce automated testing I was treated like a heretic. Well of course, that would have threatened their job security. Even managers had no power against them. If these two would quit half a dozen projects would simply be dead.

And finally, the pecking order. Juniors, like me back then, didn't get taught shit. We were just there for the work the seniors didn't want to do. When one of the senior devs had implemented a patch on the master branch, it was the junior's job to apply it to the other branches.

Second: A massive sweatshop, almost like a real-life caricature.
It was a big corporation. Managers acted like kings, always taking the best for themselves while leaving crumbs for the plebs (=devs, operators, etc). They had the spacious single offices, we had the open plan (so awesome for communication and teamwork! synergy effects!). When they got bored, they left meetings just like that. We... well don't even think about being late.
And of course most managers followed the "kiss up, kick down" principle. Boy, was I getting kicked because I dared to question a decision of my boss. He made my life so hard I got sick for a month, being close to burnout. The best part? I gave notice a month later, and _he_still_was_surprised_!
Plebs weren't allowed anything below perfection, bosses on the other hand... so, I got yelled at by some manager. Twice. For essentially nothing, things just bruised his fragile ego. My bosses response? "Oh he's just human". No, the plebs was expected to obey the powers that be. Something you didn't like? That just means your attitude needs adjustment. Like with the open plan offices: I criticized the noise and distraction. Well that's just my _opinion_, right? Anyone else is happily enjoying it! Why can't I just be like the others? And most people really had given up, working like on a production line.

The company itself, while big, was a big ball of small, isolated groups, sticking together by office politics. In your software you'd need to call a service made by a different team, sooner or later. Not documented, noone was ever willing to help. To actually get help, you needed to get your boss to talk to their boss. Then you'd have a chance at all.

Oh, and the red tape. Say you needed a simple cable. You know, like those for $2 on Amazon. You'd open a support ticket and a week later everyone involved had signed it off. Probably. Like your boss, the support's boss, the internal IT services' boss, and maybe some other poor sap who felt important. Or maybe not, because the justification for needing that cable wasn't specific enough. I mean, just imagine the potential damage if our employees owned a cable they shouldn't!

You know, after these two employers I actually needed therapy. Looking back now, hooooly shit... that's why I can't repeat often enough that we devs put up with way too much bullshit.

I just created these folders. I own you computer. Obey me and let me in.

I didn't really qualify, but I applied for a dream position anyway. I didn't get to say much at the interview. She did all the talking in such a tempo that I sort of lost track of the conversation. Then she said something about an ambulance and I said: "What?"

"Yeah, the last guy had to go to the er, he was so stressed out at the job. Anyway, I think you'll be perfect. We'll call you."

She didn't though, so I called them a few weeks later, prepared for bad news.

"Yeah, sorry for not calling you back. Someone died, so we've been quite busy. Call NN to sort out your schedule."

I did turn out the be real good at the job, and I enjoyed it immensely. I have no idea how she figured that out though.

Go home C++
You are drunk

I never thought I'd say this but I fucking hate my cousins and relatives.

Money and fame hungry people, constantly judging and excluding if you are not 'cool' enough. Give them attention, obey their orders, spend your money on them if you want to be considered human by them.

They spend 24x7 of their on Instagram with all their activities and gatherings revolving around the core idea of taking pictures and showcasing on Instagram.

All of them have inherited a fuck ton of fortune from their parents and live to spend. Nothing else in their life.

Their ideology is everyone should spend all their money and even if you have $5 in your savings, you are miser.

Cousins and relatives have bullied so much in my childhood that I had to go for therapy before I stabilised a little. They still fuck around and use me.

Now that I am living a better life than what I used to, they have started mocking my parents for it by shaming and excluding them from the family.

Not only I never wished ill but I prayed for their good health and success all my life. But all they did was neglect and ignore me.

Fucking blood sucking bastards. I still don't wish bad but I never thought I'd see this day where I'd hate them so much.

As I have worked really hard for my current life, because unlike them I had no fortune to be inherited, they pick some weak aspect of my life and poke it continuously to the point that it hurts me.

I never felt so alone. If not for my parents, I'd cut off all the times with such scums and move out for a better life with new people in life.

"I pay, you obey"
have fun!

Dammit! My daughter seem to have a resolution problem with her drawings. Anyone know if there's a device driver that can be upgraded or something?

My first C++ programm which calculates binary numbers to hex numbers.

It's always a feature 😂

Now I am a little bit scared 😂

Didn't write comments...

Is it just me, or is the rants longing for stickers and balls (sounds vaguely euphemistic) becoming just a bit too common?

I love some good stickers as much as the next guy, but wouldn't it be more fun to have them for something more, well, rant-y?

But by all means, keep ranting about what you think about, I love all of it.

Don't. Obey your instincts.

How to write bug free code:

while True:
try:
_loop() # all logic here
except:
print_excv()

This will not cause any difficulties ever. Remember to pipe output to /dev/null, make this script a critical but undocumented part of your infrastructure and tell no one about it.

Sports.
When I have low motivation I go running or riding my bike. The fresh air is great for the head.

Testers in my team have been told like 1000 times to follow the style guides that we all follow. That's not that big a deal. The big deal is that they were put on this project without having any mathematics background when the project is all about geometric stuff. So after me as a developer having to put so many hours to explain to them why the tests are not covering the requirements or why the tests are red because they are initializing the data completely wrong, I ask them pretty please to do the checks for the coding style and I have already been 4 hours reviewing code because not only I have to go through the maths and really obscure testing code to ensure that the tests are correct, but every line I have to write at least 4 or 5 style corrections. And some are not even about the code being clean, but about using wrong namespaces or not sticking to the internal data types. For fuck shake, this is embedded software and has to obey to certain security standards...

Programmers are the digital equivalent to Wizards.

Funny thought:
Just like a wizard manipulates the physical world, creating spells that obey his intentions, a programmer manipulates the digital world, creating processes and methods that obey his will.

There are quite interesting similarities.... Now where's my digital wizard cape!?

Yes. Yes it did. 😈

Internet connnection gone.
Windows-help: Search online for a solution.

Thanks Microsoft for the good idea!

Coffee and sleep...

Yesterday, microsoft showed me once again, what it means to "obey".

I tried to install Microsoft SQL Server 2012 on a virtual machine with OS Windows7.
The installation-center asked me to choose an installation-folder for SQL-Server.
No matter what, for any folder i had chosen for the installation, the setup replied with the errormessage "The installation-folder is invalid"

So i considered asking our platform-services team, whether they gave me administrative rights for the vm.
They did. I had full access to the components of my vm.

After a few days i finally recognized, that i had picked a wrong iso for the installation of sql server.

Instead of sql server 2012 + Service Pack 3, i picked sql server 2012 ServicePack 3.

So after all, Microsoft tried to tell me by showing the message "The installation-folder is invalid", that the setup weren't able to find an installation of Microsoft SQL Server 2012.

God damned!!1!

Of course, I just swiped the wrong way on my fucking laptop trackpad and list everything I just typed. FUCKING MARVELOUS.

TL;DR: Teacher stopped me from being productive. Principal almost called cops on me. Nearly threw chair at librarian.

So I'm at school yesterday, and we have a presenter in 2nd hour, so naturally, I'm gonna be on my computer doing things for other classes at the same time. Efficiency. Teacher doesn't like it, I refuse to put the computer away telling her that I'll be more productive and still pay attention, which HAS BEEN PROVEN MIND YOU, but she ends up calling security on me and I get sent down to the principal's office.

I talk to him, and he says 'Yeah, I know it's in the way, but you have to follow the directive given by the teachers.' Fine, fuck it. Won't go to her class for third hour. (I have her twice in a row for two different classes.) Next day.

I walk in, asking her if she's gonna do the same thing she did yesterday, hoping that she realized her error and will fix it, but no. She says I STILL can't have the computer out. I'm sorry, do you not realize I have 6 other fucking classes, most of which are required to graduate, unlike YOURS, as well as a FUCKING COLLEGE CLASS TONIGHT?! She gives the ultimatum. 'Obey or leave.' Fine, I'll leave. I go to the principal's office again, he must have a stick up his ass or something today because he's not budging. We argue for a while and he gives a WORSE ultimatum: 'Obey, Go to the Library, In House Suspension, or I'll call the police.' What the actual FUCK MAN?! You're gonna call the POLICE on a NONVIOLENT STUDENT?! Are you fucking MAD? I keep trying to tell him that there's an easy solution to this, but as he's getting up to call the cops, I say 'Fine! I'll go to the library!' He follows me over to make sure I don't kill anyone on the way.

I slam the door to the library open, and when I walk in, the librarian is there at her computer, and she asks 'Where are you coming from?' 'Principal!' 'I need a pass-' 'Well, I'm sorry, I can't exactly get anything for you right now, I was just sent down here.' She says 'Either way, I need some kind of note or pas-' 'Listen, I'm not in the mood for any of this right now. Please, just leave me be.' She then tries to say something, but I cut her off quickly, 'Just back off and leave me alone right now. The more you push it, the more you're gonna make me want to throw this chair!' Imagine the volume just gradually getting louder on that last one. She quickly runs out and talks to the security desk or something, which is right outside the library door, but she's the only one who comes in, thankfully. I was expecting to be fucking dragged out for no good reason. I'm loud, not violent. I have no history of violence.

So yeah. Here I am in the school library, angrily tapping away at my keyboard, trying not to throw the entire table to the fucking moon. All because this broken-ass public school system has no idea how to deviate from the norm when it's actually productive and efficient to do so. And now, the obligatory:

FUCKING PIECES OF SHIT WHY DON'T YOU REALIZE THAT YOU ARE COMPLETELY WRONG IN EVERY SINGLE THING YOU ARE DOING YOU IDIOTIC SCUM-FILLED MEAT SACKS OF NO FORSEEABLE VALUE! FUCK!

are there some graphic designers here? 😎
Do you code?
Did you learn some stuff here on devRant? What did you learn?
What do you design mostly?
How do you deal with programmers who don't obey your design specs because they're lazzy fucks? muhaha 😆
how do you think this profession will evolve in the next 10 years?

and you devs, what do you think of us? what are your experiences with designers? good and bad ones?

PM here. I'm having an interview with prospective junior devs next week. I want to make sure that they know a little and can learn a lot. Do you guys have any suggestions of how to ascertain that? I'm thinking simple programming exercises or something.

Again, it's not that important what they know today.

Stop taking names for variables and functions which makes no sense

linux mint got wasted and rekt today. in a few hours, we have managed to install git, ssh, terminator and teamviewer. everything failed except for teamviewer. wowie,, i need more time to learn how git works tbh. we tried and tried and fucking tried over and over again until the terminaL WONT TYPE IN WHAT IM TYPING LIKE WHY ARE U REFUSING TO OBEY ME NOW KEYBOArd. the worst part is that i cant even SHUT DOWN because i cant even click on shut down. i had to force it using virtualbox. oh wellll, get ready linux.....

tomorrow is another day!

Texas jokes time!

M16: Jams when dirty
AK-47: Works when dirty
Mosin-Nagant: Wasn’t clean since issuing in 1932

M16: You’d rather die than break your expensive rifle in melee
AK-47: Your rifle works good in melee
Mosin-Nagant: Your rifle is a spear that can shoot

M16: 40mm grenade launcher is heavy, but is accurate up to 200 meters
AK-47: If something goes wrong, you can throw a 40mm grenade into the window yourself
Mosin-Nagant: Throwing grenades into windows? Shoot through the wall, your cartridge penetrates one meter of brick

M16: You can use a suppressor, a small bullet doesn’t make much noise
AK-47: You can use a suppressor, but it’s better to spray and pray
Mosin-Nagant: You don’t need a suppressor — everyone will go deaf after the first shot anyway

M16: More complex than some aeroplanes
AK-47: Used by countries that have no money for aeroplanes
Mosin-Nagant: Was used to shoot down aeroplanes

A favourite drink of the user:
M16: Whiskey
AK-47: Vodka
Mosin-Nagant: brake fluid

M16: Makes a small hole, obeys the Geneva convention
AK-47: Makes a large hole, doesn’t obey the Geneva convention
Mosin-Nagant: One of the reasons for the creation of the Geneva convention

M16: Perfect for shooting squirrels
AK-47: Perfect for shooting enemies of the State
Mosin-Nagant: Perfect for shooting armoured personnel carriers

Him: i get this error when i insert into table, ForeignKey_contraint failed, what can i do?

Me: you have to obey the constraint, make sure it exists in the other table first

Him: ok i did that but i still get ForeignKey constraint error

Me: yeah that table has a couple foreign keys

Him: could you give me a very specific example how to insert into this table

Me: ........ here is a command to remove constraints on the table

Him: thanks, that fixed it!

I am helping a programmer who works with Costco integrate to software my company sells. I don't have source code, just an understanding of the database and what the software does. If he is getting paid more than me, then I should get a job there and ask for double, I could easily work 10 times faster than this buffoon.

If you need workarounds and tricks to make your computer obey you, your operating system is trash. MacOS, Windows, I’m looking at you. This is indisputable.

Instead of defending that crap, just admit it. You did nothing wrong. You was forced to use it, because I understand that not every piece of software can run on Linux. Perhaps you earn money using Photoshop or any other Adobe software. There’s nothing wrong with it. You don’t become a baby-eating trash supporter billyboy if you’re just using an OS.

Perhaps you like macOS UI better than KDE or Epiphany. There’s nothing wrong with it either.

But please don’t defend trash just because you use it for one reason or another. Admit it to yourself and say “yes, the OS I use is a piece of crap that doesn’t respect users, but right now I’m forced to use it because of the software I make a living with”. This is the only non-traumatic way to start defending your rights.

Peace

Is it just me that think it's hilarious that 'devops' autocorrects to Devils – with a capital D an all?

I love how the consultants Microsoft hired to estimate the savings upgrading to Windows 10 comes up with the number $404 per employee. I think there's a hidden message here...

I still don't get why Chrome won't respect the password *autocomplete="off"* attribute. For fucks sake it's my goddamn website u shit brain! Obey the fucking command!!!

Some bitch posted a story "Fear God and obey God's commandments, because thats the only thing asked from mankind ❤️"

This fucking story fueled me

It enraged me

Blood boil

So fucking much that i had to let this shit out here

First of all, "FEAR God..."

If you fear someone who is supposed to love you, does that look like a healthy relationship to you?

"I love you so much", said the boyfriend to his girlfriend, "but if you dont love me back then I'll set you on fire so you can burn in flames and torment"

In that case do you love him because you genuinely truly love him, or do you HAVE TO love him because of fear from burning alive in fire and torment?

Think about that fucking scenario for a while. Imagine if that scenario happens in our world. The guy would be labeled as a psychopath and get arrested IMMEDIATELY.

But it's completely ok when God does THE EXACT SAME THING, just because hes God?

I'm a christian and even this fucks me up when i think about it. The more logical mind and critical thinking i acquire the more i see through the non logical bullshit.

My faith is shaky.

Im genuinely starting to think over 50% of religious people believe in God not because they genuinely believe, but because of fear of being set on fire and torment forever.

It smells to me like its a fucking MIND CONTROL FEAR DRIVEN CULT.

I really dislike micromanagement. I don't want to dictate details. I don't like hierarchies where my direct reports obey me.

The only thing that obeys me is my hands, with them, I write the exact code I want. I don't hire another pair of hands. I hire another brain.

When you see your direct reports as professionals, you can give declarative tasks: "make a pretty website footer", "make that page load quicker". If you leave implementation details for your direct reports to decide, this doesn't mean they'll fuck up. They are professionals too, and if you personally interviewed them, you better believe they can handle it.

Decided to go through my current project and change the naming conventions to actually obey the standard Microsoft C# naming convention standards.... Fuck me this is going to be fun -.-

(I use camel case and a lot of 'unnecessary' abbreviations :-P)

Very Long, random and pretentiously philosphical, beware:

Imagine you have an all-powerful computer, a lot of spare time and infinite curiosity.
You decide to develop an evolutionary simulation, out of pure interest and to see where things will go. You start writing your foundation, basic rules for your own "universe" which each and every thing of this simulation has to obey. You implement all kinds of object, with different attributes and behaviour, but without any clear goal. To make things more interesting you give this newly created world a spoonful of coincidence, which can randomely alter objects at any given time, at least to some degree. To speed things up you tell some of these objects to form bonds and define an end goal for these bonds:
Make as many copies of yourself as possible.
Unlike the normal objects, these bonds now have purpose and can actively use and alter their enviroment. Since these bonds can change randomely, their variety is kept high enough to not end in a single type multiplying endlessly. After setting up all these rules, you hit run, sit back in your comfy chair and watch.
You see your creation struggle, a lot of the formed bonds die and desintegrate into their individual parts. Others seem to do fine. They adapt to the rules imposed on them by your universe, they consume the inanimate objects around them, as well as the leftovers of bonds which didn't make it. They grow, split and create dublicates of themselves. Content, you watch your simulation develop. Everything seems stable for now, your newly created life won't collapse anytime soon, so you speed up the time and get yourself a cup of coffee.
A few minutes later you check back in and are happy with the results. The bonds are thriving, much more active than before and some of them even joined together, creating even larger bonds. These new bonds, let's just call them animals (because that's obviously where we're going), consist of multiple different types of bonds, sometimes even dozens, which work together, help each other and seem to grow as a whole. Intrigued what will happen in the future, you speed the simulation up again and binge-watch the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy.
Nine hours passed and your world became a truly mesmerizing place. The animals grew to an insane size, consisting of millions and billions of bonds, their original makeup became opaque and confusing. Apparently the rules you set up for this universe encourage working together more than fighting each other, although fights between animals do happen.
The initial tools you created to observe this world are no longer sufficiant to study the inner workings of these animals. They have become a blackbox to you, but that's not a problem; One of the species has caught your attention. They behave unlike any other animal. While most of the species adapt their behaviour to fit their enviroment, or travel to another enviroment which fits their behaviour, these special animals started to alter the existing enviroment to help their survival. They even began to use other animals in such a way that benefits themselves, which was different from the usual bonds, since this newly created symbiosis was not permanent. You watch these strange, yet fascinating animals develop, without even changing the general composition of their bonds, and are amazed at the complexity of the changes they made to their enviroment and their behaviour towards each other.
As you observe them build unique structures to protect them from their enviroment and listen to their complex way of communication (at least compared to other animals in your simulation), you start to wonder:
This might be a pretty basic simulation, these "animals" are nothing more than a few blobs on a screen, obeying to their programming and sometimes getting lucky. All this complexity you created is actually nothing compared to a single insect in the real world, but at what point do you draw the line? At what point does a program become an organism?
At what point is it morally wrong to pull the plug?

Programming is like religion.

- you are making sombody to obey your will
- you have limited amount of resources (churches, processors, RAM, holy items)
- when you torture it, usually it will comply but not in way you are expecting
- smashing nail with hammer is not good idea (you can run out of resources again. Getting new CPU is costly as same as getting new believer)

So, who's in for new Church of Unhandled Exception?

I little MLG meme about Windows and Linux. Hope you enjoy ;-)

What do you prefer? Malewarebytes, Kaspersky or something else?

I love how devrant spreads at the office. See, no one wants to tell anyone about you since everyone wants to claim your rants as their own. But those who know, recognize the gifs as they spread across whiteboards, doors and channels nodding to each other with a secret smile.

listenables, singable, crap = select(spotify.discover_weekly,out_loud,[])

for song in listenables:
if song.style == 'oldie':
print "Seriously Spotify? Do I look like I'm 65?"
time.sleep(5.0)
out_loud.append(song)

if song.style == 'cool':
time.sleep(2.0)
continue

I had to work on a new apache server, after 3 hours of trying to figure out why this price of cap doesn't obey my will, I found out the SElinux in on(fuck you mode)

If you want to be strictly vegetarian, e.g. only eating plant-based food, and you have a nervous system (e.g. you're not a vegetable), then that's not possible. You need B12.

B12 is complex, and it can't be found in plants — lifeforms that obey laws of evolution don't just spend energy to create a complex substance they don't need. Plants don't have a nervous system, hence no need for B12.

In animal kingdom, there are no animals that are only eating plants. Not a single one of them. Herbivores eat their feces regularly, as B12 is there, but it's synthesized in our bodies at the point when there is no chance that it can be consumed.

Deer eat lemmings on a regular basis. Among herbivores, this is not uncommon.

If you want to be strictly vegetarian, and you don't want to eat B12 from supplements (because it's derived not from plants as you probably guessed), you can make it happen with certain kinds of fermented food, where B12 is synthesized by specific bacteria.

Started my company with a professor of the department, a month later I get a great contract and the prof says:

"I do not allow it, you have to obey me"

Here I am, between developing the thing I love, earning a shot ton of money and the crazy ass prof who I thought was smart and would help me.

while True:
[nag(kid) for kid in family.values() if kid.notReady()]
time.sleep(0.1)

Does Google's phone backup thing obey .nomedia or backup the SD card? It's useful to me just due to the /data backup, but I don't want it uploading and categorizing my porn folder for all to see.

i'm new on here and just was wondering why they don't date or give the timing of rants as i was looking at some of the site. Not that it's important but speaking of dates....I think we've been in this shutdown LONG ENOUGH and this is the 11th of Apr. and they're adding on more time still when at first we were to get this over with by Apr. 3 now the end of April and now even out here where i live in So. Cal. universal Studios announced (i guess) they're shutting through end of May? Oh yeh-is that a Bright Airy future outlook to say that this virus is just going to wipe more out; keep wearing them masks and obey the stay at home rules and now you got this Hydroxy...you know that one that appears to be a positive drug to "work" to actually look safe enough to try or administer, how about giving that to the people that may want it instead of we've seen some bitter bulking at that very Hydroxy...look at the 1 governor or whomever threaten to strip the license right out of that person for bringing it up! Woooo instead ya got Mr Gates not even a physician talking all these rules of forced vaccines (again??) oh yeh NOT ME! This is now a politicized coronavirus and i watched a video and I believe it!!! The test conducted at the beginning of all this was tested incorrectly and it goes on and on and now we're in this lockdown as if there's power in them numbers keeping this thing going going gone to the biggest numbers where not enough medical equipment's cried out, lines out the A__ and then finding the opposite when people have followed up on all these leads of all over the Country where all this overflood of viral is running. Don't tell me i don't have the facts, because wth does at this juncture or at this very present night to where this is sickening. Yes, there's been patients or people Human Beings that have contracted it but let's just get some real information that i just have to know to what it is thus far isn't correct. And we need to get going, get your livilihood (spell check that word) GOING and LESS FEAR because from the people that want to run all this, they look power hungry to keep it going like the one guy said 'we don't have a choice' when it comes to this will play out 12 to 18 months. OH? YOU MAY HAVE LOSER CHOICE but WE DON'T!!! And it ain't playing out neither the 18 or 12...you know what they want it to run into the election process is what they want. Plus the idea to lock us down huh? And the day by days going by are going to only allow more freedoms to l-o-s-e!

What's your full form of JOB?

Mine: Just obey boss!