Boss: "I don't want to comply with the GDPR"

Me, DPO: "I've told you the house rules. You must comply, stop arguing"

Boss: "But I don't want it. Bobby doesn't have to, and Eve doesn't have to, their moms are cool"

Me: "I don't give a crap about the other kids, you're going to be GDPR compliant. Bob and Eve will end up being raped in prison. It's that what you want?"

Boss: "What if I just pretend to do it."

Me: "I'll take away all your marketing toys. No more mailchimp for you young man."

Boss, crying: "You wouldn't touch my Facebook pixel!"

Me: "Especially your Facebook pixel. I'm so sick of that thing...."

Me: "...Look, you can still play with your toys, all I'm saying is you need to be honest and ask your buddies for consent before you put your pixels up their various holes"

Boss: "But they will never agree!"

Me: "Maybe that is good thing"

Boss: "But how will we get people to like us if I can't feed them pills and insert probes into their holes to measure their responses?"

Me: "Maybe you should focus on being a nice kid, someone people like to play with. Your buddies will tell other kids that you're a nice guy. Now, I'm not going to lie to you, it will be hard work. Much more effort than what you're doing now. But you know, those friends will stick with you for decades, instead of just until the marketing-drugs wear off"

Boss: "I think I want a new mom"

Me: "You signed a contract. You're stuck with me for the next 2 years. And as long as you're living under my roof, you will follow my rules."

11 kids in Sydney recreated Martin Shkreli's drug for just $2. The moral of the story? When you do cool shit like this, it's ok if you don't wear pants!

Person: "I'm using Ubuntu. It's my first time using Linux. It looks pretty nice and it works for me."
People: "Eww. Loser. Ubuntu sucks! I'm a Linux god."

Person: "I think PHP is fine and has improved."
People: "Yikes. Don't use PHP. Everyone hates it."

Person: "I like using Angular. It gets the Job done."
People: "Boo! Use React. Angular sucks!"

So there you go, kids. If you wanna stay cool, listen to other people's opinion and their way of thinking. No need to really immerse and try out the tools that seem to work for you.

I can’t count money as quick. I don’t know how to operate a cash register. I’m bad at following small tasks in the kitchen. Ex: girlfriend yells at me for putting unstrained yolk in recipe (after straining it).

I can’t lift heavy stuff. Out of breathe helping my mom move. My uncle told me, “if you can’t do that, how can you work?” Then he touts his son around proudly for being in the army. I felt like shit for years.

My cousins told me to get a job at McDonald’s to learn the value of a dollar. I spent all this time studying and hadn’t found a single job at the time (not that I was looking). I was living off financial aid and some income from an app that sold for a dollar on the App Store.

I would mess up if I worked there. It was depressing guys. These people who worked at McDonald’s and Starbucks. It was like a cool club that I couldn’t be a part of! I wanted to be that smooth barista at Starbucks with a smug look on my face. Making coffee for all the ladies and writing hearts next to their name on the cup.

The responsibilities of going to work day after day and blowing your paycheck at a meal at Denny’s with your friends. Complaining about not getting enough hours and talking about adult stuff! Sigh sigh sigh. Oh and taxes! Let’s complain about taxes on a single W-2 just for the hell of it (not sure why they do this when you can file a simple 1040EZ) even though we get a refund.

Then..

After many paid internships (roughly 3), now I may be receiving an offer that is 100k+ with a 401k and all benefits I can imagine. Free food up the wazoo. Gym on site. Happy hour Friday’s.

I brag about taking a shit for an hour at work and coworkers don’t give a shit. Or taking a day off to do personal errands anytime.

Having my own place in a nice area (though the cost of living is enough to take care of 3 families in another state). Supporting my girlfriend through school and helping her with her dreams of art.

Going to fancy dinners and not worrying about the bill afterwards.
Accidentally damaging my 2017 Honda Accord and not giving a fuck because I can pay $900 for repair with less than a week of work.

But I can’t help but think that all this time..

I could’ve just quit and worked at McDonalds. I could’ve been one of the cool kids..

Life with Windows 10:

An absolute nightmare. My oven doesn't work, Washing machine started rattling, toaster toasted more than it was supposed to toast. Every time windows updates it restarts my TV in my living room.

Then I met my neighbour. He lives a very happy life. I always wanted to know his secret ingredients.

One day I invited him to my house and he saw my Windows machine. He immediately insisted that I install Linux so that I can be happy and cool like him.

And that's the day my life changed. My oven started to bake beautifully, my washing machine was spinning at full speed.

Linux changed my life. I'm now part of the cool kids. Everyone loves me, embraces me.

Is your life hard? Are you not being noticed by other cool boys/girls? Are you having pain in your back? Remember:

Whatever bad happens, it's Windows 10's fault.

These fresh new college grads...calling themselves Full Stack Developers...
Ask them to consume a web service and I get a blank look...ask them to create a REST service and they are like WTF are you talking...
Has it come to the point that people just keep throwing around terms without understanding the inherent philosophy or idea behind them or is it like it's just to show that they are the "COOL" kids...with no actual idea of what the fuck they are doing ???

My words to live by...

Another one got caught today, it's all over the papers. "Teenager
Arrested in Computer Crime Scandal", "Hacker Arrested after Bank Tampering"...
Damn kids. They're all alike.

But did you, in your three-piece psychology and 1950's technobrain,
ever take a look behind the eyes of the hacker? Did you ever wonder what
made him tick, what forces shaped him, what may have molded him?
I am a hacker, enter my world...
Mine is a world that begins with school... I'm smarter than most of
the other kids, this crap they teach us bores me...
Damn underachiever. They're all alike.

I'm in junior high or high school. I've listened to teachers explain
for the fifteenth time how to reduce a fraction. I understand it. "No, Ms.
Smith, I didn't show my work. I did it in my head..."
Damn kid. Probably copied it. They're all alike.

I made a discovery today. I found a computer. Wait a second, this is
cool. It does what I want it to. If it makes a mistake, it's because I
screwed it up. Not because it doesn't like me...
Or feels threatened by me...
Or thinks I'm a smart ass...
Or doesn't like teaching and shouldn't be here...
Damn kid. All he does is play games. They're all alike.

And then it happened... a door opened to a world... rushing through
the phone line like heroin through an addict's veins, an electronic pulse is
sent out, a refuge from the day-to-day incompetencies is sought... a board is
found.
"This is it... this is where I belong..."
I know everyone here... even if I've never met them, never talked to
them, may never hear from them again... I know you all...
Damn kid. Tying up the phone line again. They're all alike...

You bet your ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at
school when we hungered for steak... the bits of meat that you did let slip
through were pre-chewed and tasteless. We've been dominated by sadists, or
ignored by the apathetic. The few that had something to teach found us will-
ing pupils, but those few are like drops of water in the desert.

This is our world now... the world of the electron and the switch, the
beauty of the baud. We make use of a service already existing without paying
for what could be dirt-cheap if it wasn't run by profiteering gluttons, and
you call us criminals. We explore... and you call us criminals. We seek
after knowledge... and you call us criminals. We exist without skin color,
without nationality, without religious bias... and you call us criminals.
You build atomic bombs, you wage wars, you murder, cheat, and lie to us
and try to make us believe it's for our own good, yet we're the criminals.

Yes, I am a criminal. My crime is that of curiosity. My crime is
that of judging people by what they say and think, not what they look like.
My crime is that of outsmarting you, something that you will never forgive me
for.

I am a hacker, and this is my manifesto. You may stop this individual,
but you can't stop us all... after all, we're all alike.

+++The Mentor+++

Friend: you really should give Windows another chance, it's really not that bad.

Me: are you in possession of the only Windows computer that doesn't blue screen whenever there's a strong breeze outside?

Friend: No ... That does happen every now and then.

Me: So what's great about it then?

Friend: Look at this cool wallpaper, it's a slideshow of pictures of my kids.

Me: ... stop talking to me immediately ... and sit over there.

Ok, I get it, stickers are "cool". However, every time I see a laptop full of them I can't help but think three things.

1) Why on earth would your ruin a perfectly nice, clean, design.
2) I see the stickers and think "wow, (s)he must really be a fan of a lot of tech companies
3) I think your were one of those kids in school that glued stickers of skateboard apparel manufacturers to your backpack because it was the "cool" thing to do.

But mainly the ruined design thing bothers me. Just..... WHY!?!

10 years ago, I found a vulnerability in the connection between an insurer I was working for, and the network of databases of municipalities. I was only a hacker in so far as kids who watched Hak5 are considered hackers, so I always carried this laptop with a fake access point, package sniffer, wep crack, sslstrip, etc with me.

The vulnerabilities allowed me to register a new identity, for which I requested a passport.

Walking up to the town hall desk with two passports with different names, both mine, was pretty cool.

I did not do anything malicious, and was hired to fix the issues (wep encryption on insurers trusted wifi, and municipality postgres gave write access to all third parties)

For a few days I was the coolest kid in school though!

I have my best moments but the first time I felt badass about computers was when I was at kindergarten.

There was one computer with one cool game with skateboard. I wanted to play but the other kids didn’t let me.

I thought that if it look like I fix the computer they will let me. I took me month or little more but I made shutdown bat(I didn’t really understood fully) and I added it to the game shortcut from usb.

One of the other kids started the game and the computer turned itself off. Hi tried a few times and then I offered to fix it, I created new shortcut replacing the “hacked” one and the game ran.

From that moment the computer and the game were always free for me.

Rovio, the company behind Angry Birds, are scumbags.

When you progress to a certain level, they offer you a cool new thing — to hatch an egg. You click “hatch”, and then you have to wait 24 hours. This builds excitement — after all, it looks like an amazing new mode, and you can't wait to see what it is.

The reality is, you hatch this beautiful little creature. From here on, you have to FEED it regularly, or it will die. They drew it the cutest way possible. How should a child resist feeding this cutie? When I hatched it, I didn't know what this new mechanic was, and I assume new players don't know either.

You feed it apples. You can find apples on certain levels, but they are scarce. The further you go, the more apples are required to keep him alive. Play the game actively to keep up with it and get apples! Or, you could just… I don't know… BUY them.

“Mom, I need $11.99 to feed Fluffy, otherwise it will die!”

A straight-up scumbag fucking mechanic in a game targeted to impressionable children that will have a hard time seeing this tiny beautiful creature die of starvation. Let's guilt-trip kids into asking money from their parents!

Why the fuck cant people keep their hands to them selves???
I had a fucking moron come up to my desk, say "cool toy!", grab it and play with it.
For him that was fine....

I on the other hand wanted to stub that mother fucker to death and feed his organs to his kids.

That mother fucker grubbed my probe holder, shorted out an 8k$ evb and failed my 12 hours hardware test.

Awhhh yeahhh!

Thanks @dfox and @trogus, y’all are cool kids!

These are gonna go all over the place!

Also, pretty sure my ducky is in the post office, being delivered Monday 😄

Y’all are awesome!

One of those things that put a smile on my face happened today.

I (like many devs) am fond of Linux. So I use Linux on everything.

I'm currently doing an internship abroad in Finland(Linus Torvald's country!) for my college.

So there is this Finnish student who uses Linux. And after a while he asked what I was using so I told him that I'm running linux(arch+i3 like all the cool kids).

So one day he was like; But can you game on Linux?
I was like, yeah sure, might not work as well as Windows but some games run native and some can be emulated through wine. He was like; Hmm maybe I'll try it out.

So he installed Linux mint on his laptop and came to work. I was rather proud (even though he installed the bastard child of Debian and Ubuntu).

So far I've helped him set up streaming games from his pc to Linux and port forwarding.

But then came the big boy. Since I always try to teach him some stuff since they don't teach him a lot at his school.

He asked me if I could help him set up a plex streaming server on Linux.

So we took an old computer and installed Ubuntu Server(Lot's of information for it).

Installed and configured plex server, qtbittorrent-knox and all kind of goodies.

I started showing him how to use ssh, how the rights system works, etc.

It broke my heart a little that he want to be able to teamviewer in it.(since it's running openSSH daemon)

So he installed Ubuntu's desktop ontop of it as well as teamviewer.

It ran slow as hell because the PC has an old crummy core2duo and ddr2 2gb of ram. It chokes when multitasking.

So seeing that as well as telling him everything that can be done with a GUI can be done in CLI.

I saw the lightbulb lighting up. He gets it now. He understand the power of Linux.

That just made me smile all the way home.

So ive been messing around with my Google Home.. because having a voice activated weather station is cool and all, but as a developer it needs to be useful no?... and Raspberry Pi, cause you know, we cool kids have those sitting around doing nothing useful.

But back on track, getting these two to actually work together, and that almighty moment you can say "Hey Google, Deploy Project -X- to the Pi" and the Rpi just kicks into gear and pulls down the latest master branch from Gitlab for the correct project is mind boggling.

No more ssh + sudo git pull !!!

Disclaimer: i didn't pay for that Google Home, but its in my house, listening to my TV, so i may as well use the damn thing.

So I guess all the cool kids have to post it at least once... Here's mine.

At the ranters who use Vim as their primary IDE. How do you manage to get some autocompletion working?
I want to be one of the cool kids and use Vim for coding but I am so used to a good autocompletion like the one IntelliJ offers.
I want to be able to browse through every method of an object or function of a module. But Vims build in engine sucks ass and YouCompleteMe doesnt seem to work that good either (only tested with Javascript, Typescript and Elm). They dont show all the correct identifiers but they do show some other random stuff.

How do you guys manage to be productive? How do you make it show only the usefull stuff?

Top gripes about getting older as I'm about to turn 40:

5. Actually starting to have moments at home after work where I'm contemplating saying 'Hey babe, wanna bang?' but before I can get the words out my body pipes in with 'Dude, cool your jets, we're wiped out today; check back tomorrow.' Women say they like older guys because <insert character trait here> but I'm now convinced it's just because they know there's less work involved. =/

4. Friends with young children. I hardly ever see them anymore, and when I do, all they talk about are their kids and their shitty relationship with their co-parent. The circle continues to get smaller...

3. Having to go get glasses in order to renew my driver's license. How do we not have a heads-up display in every vehicle by now that shows the street numbers of buildings as I'm perpendicular to them as well as the names of upcoming cross streets? That way I'd fix the problem the way I do for everything else: notch up the font scaling on my display a point or two. Elon, you're slipping...

2. Realizing that the "American Dream" isn't worth the paper it was printed on. (Anyone else remember paying 97¢ for a gallon of gas or $2 for a pack of Marlboros?) Concurrent realization: It's not easy to find work in another country without moving there first, even if you speak the language. Any devs in Portugal that read this, ligue-me.

1. Being too busy to just chat with new people I meet except on rare occasion. Mostly referring to work time here, when it seems I'm always needing to find the shortest route to the objectif du jour. If I could tell my teenage self just one piece of advice, it'd probably be "start your career in Europe, not the USA" but I really want it to be "treasure the time you spend on IRC talking about anything and everything with people that always have time for you and vice versa, because it's going to be over before you know it."

Humph. Just remembered something pretty cool. Last year I had a great math teacher and tech teacher. My class on the other hand: not great except my friends. We were being taught c++ in tech class and man were these kids the laziest i've ever seen. Just creeping up behind me and copying the code. Tech teacher walks up and opens up stack overflow on the kid's pc and walks away. Later during math class our teacher overhears kids talking about pokemon go. She then gets really excited and talks about how fun ar is to code and asks if any of the kids need c++ help. Turns out she had quit a dev position to become a teacher and give back to the community. She left halfway through the schoolyear because she was pregnant though. Needless to say most of my class caught the coding bug and it was thanks to both those teachers. The math teacher came back at the beginning of the year but then I moved back to the USA.

When I was in high school Facebook was just coming out and it was...

- a way for the cool kids to exclude anyone they didn’t like from a visible social circle.

When I was in university Facebook was taking over the world and it was...

- a place for your mom to embarrass you and your racist aunt/uncle to make uncomfortable racist comments.

Today Facebook is...

- a serious threat to society itself. A direct threat to truth and the enemy of the press.

And yet most of these weak-minded, short-term dopamine addicts are still sucking Facebook’s flaccid cock.

———

To loosely quote iceberg slim...

A real pimp can eye a bitch and gauge right away how much mileage she has...

“That hoe is good for 500 fucks”

Once the mileage runs out the bitch gets strung out and you gotta let her go.

I wonder how many more likes these dopamine-driven Facebook hoes have left in them? I wonder?

Ps. Yes, Facebook is a pimp and every time you look at it you are a hoe. You give up the preverbal pussy to them, they sell your pussy to the ticks (advertisers) and then you get fucked, getting just enough dopamine so that your fine with them selling your pussy for profit.

This is how I scored my current job.

I worked at a local newspaper as a sole dev. Nobody knew what I did, neither did they care. The job was miserable, and so was I.

A small design bureau I partly knew, had moved into the building. I hang around in their office quite a bit. Not only because they were cool kids to be with, but also because I hated being in my own office.

One thing led to another, as they say. Eventually the design bureau offered me a job. I was too chicken to jump ship atm, so I declined at first. Then the newspaper had to fire people. It was the ultimate time to jump ship. And now I wasn't only offered a job, I was also offered a partner position.

I still feel kinda lonely, as none of the others are so "dev-y". But it sure as hell beats that crappy newspaper!

Starting out as a developer and in absolute awe looking at other peoples set up here. Can't wait to be one of the cool kids

It bothers me when potential employers *require* a salary expectation in your application. It's like they're focusing on the wrong parts. I don't even consider places that do that, no matter how cool the job sounds. Remember kids, in negotiations, the first one to mention a number loses.

Recently I receive a ton of mails from cool/hip/rockstar startups. They all run like this:

"We are a innovative Startup based on a [insert some random stuff or buzzword] blockchain! If you're a student with skills and experience in blockchain, machine learning and AI willing to change the world with our sick technology and make it a better place..."

The best thing about this: since they are a innovative Startup they expect you to work for free.

But who am I to judge something so brand-new and innovative. I contacted them to find out what these dank innovations are about.

They can't even explain what a blockchain is or the basics of ML and AI, they basically just want someone do it for free...

It's still ok since no one is gonna fall for this bait... this morning a friend of mine told me he got a new job... and he even can work from home...

I'm not even mad, I just feel sadness and sorrow specially for him, because he is a good dev and accepts big times underpay and now free work, because he thinks a day off in his CV will lead him to be unemployed 😭

Fucking hate it how people successfuly manipulate kids and youth to them to work 24/7 for minimum wage or even for free and some other douchebags trying to take advantage of this 😡

Wanted to test whether my card worked online or not (was having some issues with it) and decided to try becoming a devRant supporter, and it worked!

Gotta say, I feel really happy to be able to give back to devRant and show my support by doing something as small as this. Loving the darker theme too.

Thanks for everything so far, devRant, and happy to be a supporter.

Motivations of Linux users (adult vs child):

Part of the cool kids now :p

Started with a "Python for Kids" book when I was in fourth grade, hated it, but a week later I went to a summer camp with my friend where we made a cool CSS3-styled website. Then on, I've finished most of the courses on codecademy, and built some games and apps, and more websites that my friends wanted. Welp :/, if you need me I'll be making my AI or working on an OS. I guess you could say my process was giving up on Python ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I just switched from Arch to Fedora...

I know I know that all the cool kids use arch, but right now I'm not up for checking out random gdm bugs or some other manual tasks. I need a stable, fairly supported and well maintained distro and fedora just works!

My goal for 2019 is to write an efficient neural network library with streams and make it very very very customizable. I'll write in C#, cause fuck python script kids. My idea is to make a cool platform for new ideas

I teach app development over the summer, and the great thing about working with kids and having the last name Wayne is that I can very easily have them refer to me as Batman. I've never felt so cool.

I’m finally part of the cool kids club!

Being on time for that 10 am stand-up meeting.

Yes, all the cool kids are doing it. Yes, sometimes there is a benefit in being in the office at the same time as your colleagues. Yes, communication and backbriefing is important.

Yet why has it to happen at that early early possible time? Yes I know other places are worse demanding to be in office starting from 6 to 9. (I wonder why I don't work there. Oh wait, I don't.) Some companies even try to trick you with free breakfast in the morning. Thanks, but no thanks, I just want coffee.

Here's a crazy thought: You let me do my work on my terms when and where and I guarantee I invest the hours we agreed upon in the contract and try my very best to achieve the current goal, and maybe I'll be a happy and productive employee.

How about that? No. Ok. By the way, is this a good time asking for the possibility to work from remote? Also no? Ah okay. Didn't think so ...

No Rant:

I guess I will start a religous discussion with it but I want your opinion on what tool I should learn.
Vim or Emacs (or stay with my IDE)?

For all of my programmer life I used IDEs... From Eclipse over CodeBlocks over VS to IntelliJ.
But now I realized that I want to be one of the cool kids. And using plain IntelliJ is uncool. No matter how much I love this tool.

So now I want to invest some time into learning. I never managed to do much in Vim since all code-completions sucked ass, feedback on syntax errors was bad and I never saw how I could be any faster with that shit compared to what IntelliJ does for me.
Will Emacs solve all those problems? Will Emacs make me code 1000 times faster and make having a mouse useless?
Or am I just too dumb for Vim? Can Vim itself do what my IDE does for me? Will it make me look as cool as I want to be?
Or should I stick to IntelliJ and just install Vim bindings?

What is your opinion on Vim vs Emacs vs any IDE?

Pinterest, one of the most wonderful and elegantly designed products has gone to rats.

The performance was smooth, the UX was kickass, the content was lit.

I once watched Ben's interview and absolutely loved his thought process on how he identified a problem and went ahead to build a solution for it.

Unlike Facebook/Instagram, which are designed to make you compete for dopamine shots and trigger jealousy, Pinterest was kind of different where you have a custom feed and yet no comparison or showing off. Cool right?

However, towards the end of the interview, Ben did mention that they are going (or already bagged) another round of cash. I was sceptical of why that was needed when they already had good reach, scaled product, and overall a stable ecosystem. They could instead focus on exit plans.

Pinterst has become a piece of garbage now. Cluttered with all the original features, which made it different, have been taken away. Moreover, not only the product is complicated and difficult to understand (let alone use), it is bloated with ads. The amount of ads and redirection of every search result to their shopping tab is just nauseating.

Feed has same content for days, if not weeks. You can no way customise the content been showcased and no matter how many times you report unwanted or inappropriate images, shit still shows up. The algo is rusted now.

Remember kids, this is NOT how you build and grow products. Lesson learned, capitalism has the power to destroy everything.

I miss psychological safety. I'll define it as the willingness to be vulnerable to criticism and the belief that contrary opinions are embraced and judged on their merit.

When I first entered the startup scene my manager had exceptional candor. He had no qualms talking about how kids and personal projects caused his investment in his work to wax and wane.

He always made time to talk to me when I was frustrated and made me feel like he truly listened to what I had to say, even if he didn't act on it.

At the time, I attributed the safety to the company culture created by the CTO. The startup failed and eventually, I found my way to that CTO's next startup.

Completely different experience. I find myself in despair as I hear "I'm more senior and therefore am right and don't have time or interest in your ideas" blatantly stated.

When I disagree with people, I try to ask clarifying questions to identify where the divergence occurs. Sometimes I'm surprised and learn something new, sometimes my questions prompt reconsideration.

With the CTO (now CEO), we go in circles where he squirms, deflects, and outright refuses to respond to my questions. He cancels 75% of 1:1's and when we do talk he suggests that if I disagree I "should introspect which of my beliefs is holding me back from embracing his superior way of doing things"

Multi-hour slack wars suck the life out of anyone trying to ask questions. It's so exhausting to ask questions it's often cheaper and faster to wallow in despair for an hour and hack something together than descend into people shouting preferences at each other and shaming me for not already knowing the answer.

Perks, pay, and tech-stack are all cool. It feels selfish to be unhappy because I can't innovate or challenge the status quo. Having tasted that safety though, I'm left with an unquenched thirst that grows stronger with every conflict.

Guys, why does every idea project I get are already made!

"
Hey I have an idea, I could create a linux distro to replace those 🤬 windows 7 that have office 2003 and all that crap and that always update at my brother’s school.

I should base it on Ubuntu, as it is the most popular distro with the most support on the Internet (for those teachers that can’t enter a 🤬 ‘ , yes an apostrophe).

It should have all those sweet open source softwares to show the kids the open source world.

It should have a centralized restriction thingy.

How could I name it? Oh maybe Edubuntu, yeah that’s a cool name.

*searches it*

🤬 you!

I guess I could contribute to it, but I think it’s dead

Def not dev oriented.

I am a huge fan of trading card games. It started with Yu Gi Oh, moved on to Magic, even tried, LoTR when it was a thing, tried algo Star Wars the original CCG (loved it), Duel Masters (when it was still in the U.S) Pokemon (of fucking course) and other more uncommon ones like Cardfight Vanguard, tried latino only games (Mitos y leyendas, Myths & Legends, this one is king on my list) and Flesh & Blood. But as a mexican kid, I was always a fan of fucking dragon ball, like most mexican kids.

SO I bought some cards from the newest game expansion. the owner of the TCG/anime store told me that if I was willing to play that I should hang out on tuesdays.
So, learning the rules of the game, and wanting to play with other people, I went there on a tuesday.
The MTG people were there fighting amongst themselves for some reason. the Pokemon people were there also, just opening packs without playing. A rather large table was there with a bunch of people playing a game that I did not recognize. And then there was me. I was chilling on my phone thinking that the DB dudes would show up eventually. nothing, so I just sat there waiting.
Suddenly a dude comes to the large table and starts pairing people for a "tournament" and once they are all sited he notices that 1 is missing, he walks up to me holding a store app and asks me "sorry bro, are you here to play with us by any chance?" to which I say "I do not think so, I came here for DB but I don't know what you guys are playing"
The dude looks down on his app, somehow actually sad and says "man I do play DB, but I don't think I have my cards with me, maybe, let me see" and he goes on to see if he brought something.

This was green flag n 1. the dude wanted to just play something with someone. And was doing something to not LEAVE someone behind. then quick as hell another says "well, why don't we give him a deck and he can play with us! we can teach him!" and I say "well what are you lads playing?" and he says "digimon man you like the anime? a new release came about! it's sick man it would be awesome if you play!"

Second green flag, another member of that community was happy for the idea of increasing the membership and actively did something to increase the population.

So, I hanged out with them. Close knit group, all friends from a long time, but willing to take an unfamiliar (and rather handsome) face with them.

My face when (MFW) the DB dudes where not there, so the digimon group adopted me.

I know have over.....2000 cards, most of them were gifted to me by them after they saw my chops and tough me how to play, by graciously lending me their decks.

This my lads, is what humanity is about. We got close fast, it has been 2 weeks of just chilling with them at the game lounge, just nice people, all of them really. Not a single angry moment or anything, you pull a crazy combo on them and they legit sheeeeeeeesh and applaud them, they don't care about loosing, they just want to have a good time, and this, this is a good crowd to be at.

Strive to make people feel welcomed. Being nice to others, taking a chance on people you deem to be ok, is fine really. It is rather cool. Anyone can be a salty asshole, but it takes a real king to be nice to others just for the sake of having a good time.

These dudes, they are gold. And I finally have something to take my mind away from work and other things that increase my anxiety and stress. I would much rather be there shooting the shit with the lads and playing games than at home, drinking the night away to relieve stress.

Kings

A 20-Something: “Hey, why aren’t you dressing up on spirit week decades dress theme days in the office this week?”

“Because I lived in all those decades and my childhood is not a costume.”

“Okaaaay…”

“Because when we dressed up for spirit week in high school we nerdy kids would always get made fun of by the jocks and cheerleaders because we didn’t get the memo that spirit week was only for the cool kids. I have trauma I’m still working through because of that.”

“Geez, I…”

“Look, I got rid of all that shit years ago. Now I’m supposed to go to a thrift store and spend money I earned here for real world needs on 4 new sets of clothes I will wear one time each? That’s literally my gas money to get to this office in an inflated economy. No.”

Me. In my head. Coming up with things to explain myself when I show up at the office dressed like it’s a regular day.

PHP is like the janitor in the school who has worked there for 40+ years and is liked by the authorities of the school. He has stood the test of time and has seen the highs and lows of life.

And the new gen-z kids, who don't even know how the world works/recently started exploring the world, hate that man for no reason except to look cool.

BTW, if you plan on commenting anything negative, just remember that the very platform you're using to do so, is built on PHP.

All the cool kids in the neighborhood owning a Commodore 64. I was about 7-8 I think. Piracy was big back then, the kids swapped those large floppies and tapes containing hundreds of games through the mail. And all those cool hacktros, trainers, intros and whatnot got me interested in computer graphics and programming.

I like how google is trying to catch up in the competition of video calls, and chat...

I have a Gmail account & work email is on Google G-Suit, every time I access one of them that Google meet popup shows in a desperate attempt to make people use it ....

Post BA Phil degree pre CS degree
My parents - oh cool
My extended family - 'I thought you were going to go to law school, wow how many times are you going to change your mind?' 'who is going to pay for another degree, oh yeah your parents, kids these days' 'so what are you going to do with that Philosophy degree?' 'What are you going to do when mommy stops supporting you?'

Post CS Degree, employed doing what I love, paying off my loans
My parents - yay
My extended family - sweet f*cking silence, and the occasional 'oh so you are working on computers now?'

HA

I guess my story is not really cool, but okay, I lost my job as a Digital designer (Yeah, I actually have a bachelor's degree in graphic design, I'm an impostor)

I lost it because I saved enough money to travel to Japan and I wanted to stay at least a month so the company didn't like it. after coming back I got a job as a content editor, I just copied old content from an old website to a new one, basic html and css, not even responsive design, then I got really into it, and bootstrap came along, the company opened a new department "Front End" so I got in, I learnt responsive design and Jquery, really loved it, I went back to Japan for a month and a half, keeping my job, I liked it, but I quit.

I now work as a remote front end and I feel stuck, I'm very comfortable as remote, don't wanna go back to an office, but it seems I'll have to, can't find any opportunities to improve remotely, and I feel like I'm missing what the "cool kids" are doing.

Today was a rather funny day in school. School starts for me at 13:40 because our timetable planners are so qualified for this job.

First 2hrs: Physics, fine its good

Second 2hrs: Discrete Maths (however you want to call it)
Goal is to write a text (30 pages, 10, etc all those standard settings). Teacher prefers Latex over word, but we can do it in word if we want. We could choose a topic, I took primes because it looked the best. I decided to use latex because I'm a fetishist and it simply looks better in the end. A classmate was arguing with our teacher about ides: texmaker vs kile. And I'm like "I use vim". So my teacher is like kk

Later that class, when we actually started doing stuff I started the ssh session to my server because I don't know any good c++ compilers for win and I'm too lazy to get a portable version of cygwin (or whatever its called). So in my server I open vim and start coding my tool for Fermat Primes (Fermatsche Primzahlen, too lazy to actually translate). And this teacher seriously is the best teacher I ever met in my life. Usually teachers are like " dude r u hakin' the school server?" and I'm like bruh its just vim and I'm doing it this way because I cannot code on your PC coz I can't install a compiler. And this teacher is like "oh hey you actually use vi, all cool kids used it in 2000. I first though u were kidding and stuff..." And we continued talking about more of stuff like that and I have to say that this is the first teacher that actually understands me. Phew

Now I'm going to continue writing my 30 pages piece of trash latex doc and hope it'll end good

Ok so was dating this girl who n has a 8 year old I was with her for 4 year her son calls me dad... Long fucked up shit story short. She cheated fucked me over all that cool I stayed for the kid... A few months later I catch her in my son's bed with another dude.. ya I know right my apartment my everything!!!! How could she right.... but as most men knows Once Upon and gets caught doing something they turn into something completely unrecognizable in ridiculous. If I do whatever she says and wants to still let me in her son's life!! And as soon as I left my apartment to her she moved some dude in with his two kids and stole everything that I had.. so I had to get coppers involved to try to get some stuff... I mean I was free balling to work with no socks .. no towels nothing... you can only imagine how badly I wanted to go into my apartment and destroy this dude.... But for my son's sake I bit my lip and took it... she got a hold of my spare car keys both spare key tab and keys... shortly after I left they run my truck of all my HVAC technician tools... Then to make it worse some months later she emptied out my truck again... and you can only imagine how upset I was about everything because I love that kid and I don't want him to have to go through anything.... Someway somehow her and her new boyfriend got some guys off GitHub I mean I'm getting torn up out here ... GPS trackers .. people following me... and everytime I leave my truck or leave anything that gets broken into and stolen... it was so bad that they even made me lose my job at three different stores that I was working not because of my performance but every time I would walk outside of work my truck wouldn't start or it would be completely ransacked. Someone plz HELPPPPP and yes that's like the 4th GPS tracker that I've taken out of my second vehicle now because of this crap it is literally almost ruined my life

cool kids code in JavaScript

To the people who so blindly hate apple: Name my other choices...

Winblows is a bloated system with no real package manager, i can't stop their endless updates, it gets viruses so easily, that you have to install an antivirus, and i hate their flat design, and linux is for haX0r kids who wanna look cool, it's just not practical for personal use.

!dev

Hello there..

I always wanted to have my first post here be something that pisses the sh!t out of me.

tl;dr: Memes are for braindeads and kids are fucktards

Backstory:
So basicaly I am now having a summerjob before my next semester starts so I can make some cash to buy some overpriced stuff I dont probably need. I work at a factory, 3 shift work and today we had Night shift, so there was me and a bunch of Arab guys, kicking our asses by pure boredom and desperacy.

Act One:
I was bored, opened my phone and decided entertain myself by some funny sh!t I can find on Mark Sugarhills webpage. I was just passing by some random a bit funny stuff and then I found some random ass meme, which doesnt give a single, even distant sence to me.. So since my german is as good as my coding skills (read: complete shit) I couldnt ask for opinion of my fellow coworkers and since its fuck1ng 4am theres noone to ask on messenger or whatever. So I did it... I asked in a goddamn comments, what the fck is that supposed to mean and Aw dear Lawd... I did a mistake.

Act 2:
Like 4 seconds after my question I had a response and I was like 0.o It has to be some Alice of Facebook so I guess someone cool. Oh boy I was never so wrong. The answer... the... FUCKING answer was.... "normie."

What the actual fuck?
Like man statisticaly speaking, there is 200,000 people on this wannabe funny site and since everyone is apparently laughing their asses off, I am the motherfucking original snowflake.

But I wanted to play it cool... was like Uhm sorry, I really tried but cant figure it out.

His fuck-me-sideways-with-rusty-crowbar answer was:
a) The joke is hidden in some random thing we created yesterday and decided to call it a culture
b) "u dumb"

Act 3:
I hope that most of you finally guessed it! Its the second fucking answer and oh sweet mother of pain, please find him, BUT thats where I flipped and fucking lost it.

The fucking nerve to speak to me like that u dissrespectful piece of shit. Go watch some Twitch, while I SSH into ur ass and hit u harder than ur mom her forehead everynight when she realises that she could have swallow you dickhead.

Afterthoughts:
I was always worries that my child would like to be a Rapper, or Youtuber...
But today Im adding being some dumb ass meme creator.

Finally! Barbies for all the cool kids out there 😊

Remember kids, passwd is a readable file! You can have a very bad day trying to figure out a user's shell from side-channel attacks and getting nowhere, or you could remember that it LITERALLY SAYS WHAT IT IS PUBLICLY IF YOU DON'T FORGET THAT IT'S THERE.

On the plus side, I learned a ton about what you can do with ssh arguments and debugging logs. Shit's pretty cool.

Dependency injection and RX java and all are cool.

But I like to do good object oriented programming.

And now there are kids in start ups who see devs doing good object oriented programming as retards.

Android as a platform provides everything that you need. Why abuse a simple app with all fancy stuff when you can accomplish stuff with simple oops which takes the same amount of time ?

Am I the one feeling this way ?

Hey kids, do you want to know what's cool and hip?

Writing scripts to formalize and encode domain specific procedures related to development and sharing it within the entire team is cool!

Readmes with step-by-step guides are highly overrated.

How Microsoft expect anyone to develop using any technology they introduce with so many limitations.
Moi a Microsoft dumb enthusiast said to myself : hey dude you are a developer stop whining about the app gap bust a move create decent array of apps and release them, went into a full project management mode wrote requirements did sketches and some prototypes, time to execute.
1. first app: image files organizer, viewer , with some light editor capabilities and album creator after some work i came to discover that you don't have a proper file system APIs to show a folder tree view in my app "WTF" there are work arounds and dirty solutions but seriously? i can only access the stupid media folders created by Microsoft and that's it.
so i ditched the apps until uwp become a development tools with target audience other than kids who eat crayons, and while using "Edge" i thought to my self : "you know what dude extensions are cool and if you do something like a speed dial it would be awesome"
fire up my text editor started writing my extension to discover that:
"you cannot use localStorage from local HTML files".
moral of the story
MS is failing with consumers not because people hate MS but rather MS hates itself like no engineer over there said to him self this is fking stupid ?
other limitations :
no proper system tray access
no registry access what so ever
and i have started 2 days ago.
yeah Ms this is the main app gap problem the uwp sucks big time. compared to android Java which has a great access to every aspect of the device even apple provide better APIs for their systems.
if uwp is MS future then rip MS.
please i stand corrected if anyone knows better.

Final year kids at a technological university: "Well, we just get a job and then cool down for a bit."
University ten days later: *publishes a notification*
Summing up the notice: "No no no, you better write a research paper, even though you are a tech student and you should be making a cool ass project for your Major.
WHY?
We don't want you to do a semester-long internship to get some relevant experience because we have a lot of Ph.D. students who aren't worth shit but we gotta give them doctorates. SO, YOU BETTER WRITE A PAPER, MAKE HIM/HER THE FIRST AUTHOR EVEN THOUGH HE/SHE IS INCOMPETENT AND HASN'T CONTRIBUTED EVEN A LINE WORTH TO THE PAPER. AND IF YOU DON'T WRITE A FUCKING PAPER, WE'LL FUCK UP YOUR FUCKING GRADES."

Who amongst you remembers Ultima Online?

At one point probably one of the best games ever made. Even wrote the record for most players online and got in the Guinness Book of records for it. This was during the dial-up days. You kids these days have no idea how slow internet was or how cool it was to hear those three special words, You've Got Mail.

Everquest and WOW dont have shit on this game even if it never really went 3D. There was a sorta blocky 3d but it sucked which is why it failed. Everyone was content with 2d because the blocky 3d was trash in most circumstances.

With Ultima it made you feel like a kinda second life. And it wasn't a chore like Life Is Feudal or many of the other grundy games of today.

My 80 year old grandfather played it all day everyday. That's how fucking good the game was.

I would still be playing the official servers a decade plus, later if they would stop adding unnecessary dlc and they wouldn't have added a pay store.

It seriously pisses me off that I spent years collecting and hoarding rare items that I actually fucking earned and the assholes add a pay store that lets these new players buy the item I fought a boss four hours to get.

It ain't fucking right. It literally makes the rares worthless and my efforts pointless.

EA also rushed Ultima IX so it was buggy as hell and technically unbeatable unless you edited the game to let you cheat. Richard Garriott made the game and bugs and all is a masterpiece. His new game Shroud of The Avatar, not so much but that's a different rant.

I honestly wish EA would go out of business. They have ruined enough of my favorite titles with their incompetent bullshit and greedy cash grabs. If they would just make UO the way it was around the second age or Lord Blackthorn I'd guess a lot of us old-school vets would come back.

But as it is our only real option is to build our own servers or play someone else's which is what I do. Fuck EA!

Heading to NDC Minnesota for the week. Hopefully going to get a chance to learn some cool new stuff! If anything it will be a break from work and kids, and maybe some time to actually code!

ugh what have I done to myself?

Today I started this codingame thing someone mentioned on here, but because I'm stubborn I've played every puzzle or game in bash so far...
So yeah, I'm loosing to all the cool kids using C++ or python even on simple stuff and I'm always struggling with this weird syntax - like "$" or not ... whitespace? parenthesis?

I mean I do like some bash but these games are really not made for it

So i have decided to rewrite my old project from the ground. This time propely with all the bells and whisles and the proper planning.

Before i ever could start hammering at my keyboard in VS like a monkey i have encountered a few problems:

1.I want for it to be Reeeeesponsive or whatever yeet the kids think is cool now. So winforms arent going to be cut it, i would have to manualy handle resizing of the buttons and text. So UWP or WPF are the only choice.

2.I want it to be multiplatform. Some users might want to use it on windowsnt so i have to be prepared. Options: Winforms or .netcore without gui......

3.Licence - I want to allow people to use it but i always want them to know who the author is. That app wont get that much attention so allowing people only to use it is the safest option.

I wish there was a easier way...
Still i love C#

I'am porting a react app to a bunch of web components, I've been told, WebComponents is what the cool kids use these days

Not exactly a rant, but I'm wondering where to go next with my learning.
I'm a c# dev and I want to get more into massive, scalable, distributed application development.
I sort of want to be with the "cool kids" i.e. open source, node.js, docker, scala, you name it. I get that open source moves quickly, but I get the feeling that every new framework is a fad.
Then again there is the corporate world with shitloads of money who are invested in .net and will very soon want people who can redesign their software so that their management can use all the buzz words.
I'm thinking into get into consulting and claim my slice of pie there by designing their solutions to go on the cloud so they can throw even more money at microsoft.
Anyway, I'm doing a bit of soul searching so feel free to throw in your 2 cents

!Rant

What do you think of Common Lisp vs the Cool Kids(programming languages) of the present ?

Is it worth to learn it ?

.net js developer for just over a decade. What other backend language/framework should I learn to get a cool job in sf