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Search - "starbucks"
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If you see someone coding at mcdonalds, starbucks etc.
"Excuse me, would you like a fork for that spaghetti"14 -
Just me minding my own bussiness at a coffee shop (not starbucks) and a stranger comes up to me.
“Check line 37, might be an error there (laughs)”
I was shocked to say that she’s correct, is she the one guys?17 -
When developing outside of a Starbucks and a bird decides to shit right on the keyboard of your laptop 😑13
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I came to Spain escaping my home country and started looking for a job in ANYTHING. Had done some coding as a hobby but nothing serious, still I sent a CV to some starting positions online (also sent the same CV to pet shops, Starbucks, cloth stores...) And I got chosen to participate in a one week training course / trial at a big company.
At the same time I managed to get a spot on a free and amazing course for music production, my dream profession. Yet I had to go for the one that actually had some work opportunities!
Got the job after the trial was done and immediately got sent to work with a 3 person team that was in charge of setting up a giant SharePoint site for the local mail office. It was kind of insane! For months I had no idea what I was doing and thought I was going to get fired any day.
5 years later, I still have no idea.6 -
Here's to all the people who are willing to spend 5$ at starbucks but refuse to spend a dollar on an app5
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When you're just coding away in some Coffee Shop and some random guy/girl asks you
"are you trying to hack the wifi" smh12 -
I googled "fuck apple" and ended up here... so yeah fuck this piece of shit company with shitty overpriced cancer inducing products. Xcode is the worse garbage I've ever seen in my life. For a company that masturbates to their superior design well they can eat a fat dick cause its horrible. Everything this fucking company does makes me waste my time. Add a fucking notch to their displays, retarded app store process, makes you workaround to install latest OS on older machines, hide options in convoluted interface, everything, make you feel like your 12 again and living with your parents. fuck them. fuck apple fan boys. fuck tim cook. fuck kids that jack off to iphones fuck you if you own a macbook and drink at starbucks . this is the last fucking ios app I ever make. bye39
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First rant.
Managing an app in Canada, came back home to Thailand to visit my parents.
No deployments while you're gone, just bug fixes, boss said.
Landed at 3am, "hey I know we only support desktop but we got new customers only on iPad, make it responsive in a day and deploy." Wtf.
Haven't even seen my parents. In Starbucks.15 -
Me coding at Starbucks and this hot chick passing by me stops to tell me:
- I love WebStorm, don't forget to command + alt + L.
Me:
WebStorm:
MacBook:
Charger:20 -
I can’t count money as quick. I don’t know how to operate a cash register. I’m bad at following small tasks in the kitchen. Ex: girlfriend yells at me for putting unstrained yolk in recipe (after straining it).
I can’t lift heavy stuff. Out of breathe helping my mom move. My uncle told me, “if you can’t do that, how can you work?” Then he touts his son around proudly for being in the army. I felt like shit for years.
My cousins told me to get a job at McDonald’s to learn the value of a dollar. I spent all this time studying and hadn’t found a single job at the time (not that I was looking). I was living off financial aid and some income from an app that sold for a dollar on the App Store.
I would mess up if I worked there. It was depressing guys. These people who worked at McDonald’s and Starbucks. It was like a cool club that I couldn’t be a part of! I wanted to be that smooth barista at Starbucks with a smug look on my face. Making coffee for all the ladies and writing hearts next to their name on the cup.
The responsibilities of going to work day after day and blowing your paycheck at a meal at Denny’s with your friends. Complaining about not getting enough hours and talking about adult stuff! Sigh sigh sigh. Oh and taxes! Let’s complain about taxes on a single W-2 just for the hell of it (not sure why they do this when you can file a simple 1040EZ) even though we get a refund.
Then..
After many paid internships (roughly 3), now I may be receiving an offer that is 100k+ with a 401k and all benefits I can imagine. Free food up the wazoo. Gym on site. Happy hour Friday’s.
I brag about taking a shit for an hour at work and coworkers don’t give a shit. Or taking a day off to do personal errands anytime.
Having my own place in a nice area (though the cost of living is enough to take care of 3 families in another state). Supporting my girlfriend through school and helping her with her dreams of art.
Going to fancy dinners and not worrying about the bill afterwards.
Accidentally damaging my 2017 Honda Accord and not giving a fuck because I can pay $900 for repair with less than a week of work.
But I can’t help but think that all this time..
I could’ve just quit and worked at McDonalds. I could’ve been one of the cool kids..8 -
List of benefits given by some random company to its developer,
1- Medical, Dental, AD&D
2- Generous paid time off and holidays
3- Free fitness center in our building
4- Flexible schedule
6- Mac or PC, your choice
7- We and our customer don't use IE
8- Starbucks on the 1st floor
9- Generous 401k match
...
But I like 7th one the most!6 -
It's a perfect chronological sequence from left to right:
"I'll fix this bug in a jiffy"
"Fml i can't figure out whats wrong"
"I give up on life"
and then finally "Oh look, missing semicolon"
Pic taken at a Starbucks in MountainView CA5 -
May not be much but this is my first desk as a programmer; no more awkwardly hopping from couch to couch or from Starbucks to Starbucks. Outlook for future productivity is looking good y'all.5
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import LongRantKit
import NonRantKit
import TldrKit
I don't like stickers on my laptop because it clutters it up. But today I realized the importance of them.
A few months ago I was sitting at a coffee shop working on a paper and I noticed a guy with this cool sticker on a MacBook Pro: it had the integral symbol to the left of the Apple logo, and to the right of it a lowercase d and another Apple logo. It took me a few hours to realize what it meant, but I finally did and at that point I also guessed that not many people know what it is.
So I, as antisocial as I am, I finish up my work and before I leave I walk up to him and say hi. At this point I'm a senior in high school and I learn he's a junior in the same college I plan to attend. We talked a little before I had to leave and got to know each other somewhat.
After I leave I find him on Instagram and Facebook and friend him and such.
Recently I posted a picture saying I had recently joined the Apple Developer Team, and also recently reposted a memory on Facebook from 5 years ago that was a screen capture of an iPhone 4 simulator running iOS 5 showing off one of my first apps.
Then yesterday I get a message from the guy I met at the coffee shop asking for some help with an iOS project he's working on. We decide to meet today and I spend the entire morning showing him the basics of Swift, Xcode, Interface Builder, etc. I feel like I really helped him jumpstart his app and helped him understand the basics of different concepts.
If he didn't have that integral sticker on his laptop I would have never had this opportunity to finally share some iOS development experience.
For this I would like to thank my high school calculus teacher, with whom I spent many classes at Starbucks because I was an only student. I'd like to thank laptop stickers, and finally I would like to thank the coffee shop.
TL;DR: Said hi to a guy with an integral sticker on his laptop, a few months later he approaches me for help understanding iOS development.2 -
guy: why do you use a vpn?
me: cause I don't want my info stolen
guy: nobody can steal info from wifi that's just in the movies.
me: ...
was on wifi in a Starbucks close to Atlanta9 -
Want to get kicked out of Starbucks and have a good laugh along with it? https://github.com/filthycoding/...
I was bored.
Also thanks @Skayo for starring this repo early even tho it had no content9 -
Getting told that technology is bullshit and that humans have forgotten how to interact with each other (meaning being social) by people from the same age bracket that throw a fit because they can't use said technology is both hilarious and infuriating.
Seriously, aren't these old farts more concerned with things such as starbucks not putting "merry Christmas" on their fucking red cups? Am I supposed to take their shit seriously? No the fuck I am not, and neither should you.
If your old ass can't work how your fucking smartphone works, or have a haaaaard time trying to select Netflix from your smart tv app selection then the problem is not my generation. Its your dumbass for not keeping up.
Its fine if you don't want to use technology, fuck if I care. But you ain't winning this shit because of your preferences regarding technology.
Also, telling me that I am wrong for wearing my headphones at the gym to shut people off. Wtf dude, not everyone wants to fucking talk to others all the time, specially during gym time. I am there to work out and get sexy af, not to ask you how your fucking day went, I don't know u, i don't want to know you, you already showed me how fucking close minded and uninteresting you can be, why the fuck should I give that shit a chance?
Fuck outta here with that shit. He went on to tell me that software is made by people with 0 social skills. Booooooy I would have your granddaughter(she is my age) any day of the fucking week and you can tell me if we lack "social skills"
Foh13 -
FUCKING STARBUCKS
Get your goddamn internet speeds up to 1st world speeds
I have a fucking paper to write9 -
Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit... I'm at Starbucks, coding on my laptop. I just came outside to smoke a cigarette and right after I lit it, bird shit landed on the ground two feet to my right. 😥
Close call...6 -
> Take girlfriend to Starbucks
Me: I'll ask for a cold brewed coffee, what would you like?
She: I don't like coffee...8 -
Code review time:
Hey Rudy, can you approve my PR? ??? Shouldn't it be can you review my PR?(thought to myself)
Anyway, as a new practice, we(royal we) do not approve PRs with js files. If we touch one, we convert it to typescript as part of a ramp up to a migration that never seems to get here. But I digress.
I look at the laziest conversion in history.
Looked like
Import 'something';
Import 'somethingElse';
Import 'anotherSomething';
export class SomeClass {
public prop1: any;
public prop2: any;
public prop3: any;
public doWork(param: any){
let someValue = param;
// you get the idea
return someValue;
}
}
Anyway, I question if all the properties need to be visible outside of the class since everything was public.
Then if the dev could go and use type safety.
Then asked why not define the return type for the method since it would make it easier for others to consume.
Since parts of the app are still in js, I asked that they check that that the value passed in was valid(no compilation error, obviously).
Also to use = () => {} to make sure "this" is really this.
I also pointed out the import problem, but anyway.
I then see the his team leader approve the PR and then tell me that I'm being too hard on his devs. ????
Do we need to finish every PR comment with "pretty please" now?
These are grown men and women, and yet, it feels oddly like kindergarten.
I've written code in the past that wasn't pretty and I received "WTF?" as a PR comment. I then realized I ate sh*t on that line of code, corrected it and pushed the code. Then we went to Starbucks.
I'm not that old(35), but these young devs need to learn that COMPILERS DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS!!!!!
Ahhhhhh
Much better.
Thanks for the platform.8 -
I had this a while ago. I just pulled an all-nighter because of some servers issues so I went to a coffee shop at my usual train station on my way to my study to get an espresso. I had some difficulties with keeping my eyes open and then these teenage girls walked towards the starbucks (nope I don't do starbucks) saying something like 'Oh my god I need caffeine otherwise I won't survive today omg'.
Five minutes later they came walking out with a few huge 'coffees' with shitloads of milk and whipped cream.
I kept myself sane but I just really wanted to scream 'THAT"S NOT COFFEE/CAFFEINE, THAT"S FUCKING DESERT YOU FUCKING FUCKWITS'.
I really couldn't stand those girls at that moment nope.6 -
At Starbucks today, ordered a lactose free JavaScript Frappucino. The barista turned out to be a computer science student, I'm pretty sure he spat in my cup.3
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I only develop UIs with react and only ever with functional components
I would actually DIE without my MacBook Pro 16”
I spend roughly 30 minutes a day trimming my beard. I’m a civilized man after all
I only drink Starbucks coffee, and only if it’s a triple pump latte
Ew what’s jQuery? Sounds like something my grandpa used
Omg really? Are you still using PHP in 2020?! Lame!
Gross. Windows is for n00bs and Linux is for nerds. macOS FTW
Post is comprised of quotes from a classmate who annoyed the living hell out of me14 -
So I decided to get a master degree at my capital city (I got my first degree from my small hometown), and decided to get a job as a junior developers. I tried for an easier job like starbucks or something but apparently all of them turn me down as soon as they asked “What major you graduated from ?”
Never though I would start a career in software developing. Any tips I need to know about this job? (I can actually code quite well and my class starts at night)2 -
I met a fake “programmer / hacker” at Starbucks. He was so full of shit & he couldn’t stop talking about things that didn’t make sense8
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I love to code in coffee shop likes Starbucks and its really boost my productivity, until I realized I could broke if I always go here so I make clone the Starbucks environments to my bedroom.
Then I buy cheap loudspeakers and coffee bean, playing unknown jazz music and pretend that I am in coffee shop. productivity increased! outcome decreased!1 -
Sitting at Starbucks cause my train is delayed and it's the only place with freaking free wifi.
I found the stereotype hipster :D
A guy having Beats Headphones on with a MBP, iPhone X obviously next to his MBP, searching for Elon Musk Audiobooks and Courses for Smalltalk and Management on Audible 🤣6 -
So, this is probably somewhat esoteric but...
While studying at university I had a "programming paradigms" module, dunno why they called it that, it was more like "introduction to functional programming".
So, it's kinda mind bending, we'd only really started to get our heads around classical object oriented programming and they throw functional programming at us.
It's worse than that though, for do they use an established language, like lisp/scheme, functional Python, or even given Haskell?
No, of course they didn't. They taught us Oz.
You probably won't have heard of it, but this language is burned into the back of my brain, along with a vague understanding of the n-queens problem we had to solve graphically (using qTk, which I dunno if someone took qt and tk and blended them, I stopped asking questions after a while).
To top it off did this language (at the time) have a stand alone interpreter? Did it buggery! It was coupled to the Mozart programming system, which is just Emacs (which has a bloody lisp built into it,so close, yet so far 😭).
It gets worse, though, oh does it get worse, for pause dear reader and consider, have you ever heard of Mozart/oz before, I'd put money on most of you had not heard of it until today.
For, you see, I believe at the time of writing, one, yes, ONE text book exists on this language. When I was doing my assignment there was merely some published conference notes and language design documents.
That's not all, I was not the only one experiencing difficulties with this language, someone in the class ended up pouring through the mailing lists and found the very tutor teaching the class struggling at first to understand the language.
I had to repeat that year. The functional programming class was one semester.
When I retook that year, it was a whole year long. However, halfway through the year, original tutor was fired and a new tutor was hired to teach the language.
He was, understandably, just as confused as we were.
There was a Starbucks and a pub equidistant from the lecture hall, though in opposite directions. From lecture to lecture we had no idea which one we'd end up in.
I have reason to believe Mozart/Oz it some sort of otherworldly abomination designed to give students the occasional nightmare flashback, long after they've left.
My room had post it notes, sheets of paper, print outs, diagrams, doodles and pens, just stuck to the wall, I looked like a raving lunatic three hours away from being institutionalised. There was string connecting one diagram to the next and images of a chess queen all over. As I attempted to solve the n-queens problem.
Madmans knowledge, I call it. I can never unlearn all that, in fact it seeps into much of the code I write. Such information was not meant for the minds of a simple country bumpkin such as myself...
Mozart/Oz... I wouldn't be the programmer I am today without it, and that's frankly terrifying...10 -
Fuck this day!
Like really fuck it!
I have one of the most terrible crunch-time i ever experienced.
I’v been working 12+ hours every day with an ever-changing project timeline.
It started simple, we made a timeline, it was risky even then but it was realistic, we started working immideatly, everything looked good then a few days in BOOM! Actually our project management completely forgot client B’s projects soo we need to do that too with the same fucking deadline!!! (About 10x more work in waay less time)
Then this morning i got an email from the graphics team that we need to document our design process RIGHT FUCKING NOW! Because management wants documentations, in the middle of a fucking crunch-time.
Today it almost got physical with my project manager, i told him that he is not a programmer, i dont fucking care about his shit, just fuck off and let me work because we won’t be ready based on his unrealistic bs.
I feel like completely fucked over, like we were told 2 days before deadline that the whole company and people’s jobs depends on us now because if we wont finish this clients won’t pay.
WE ARE TWO PROGRAMMERS for studio of 10-12 people!!!
Soo i’w been thinking about getting the fuck out of here ASAP, i got an offer from a pretty big international gamedev company just what i needed, i already did their test before all of this, i passed A+.
We scheduled a skype interview for today. I had completely no time to prepare or chill off, just got out of the office, got into a starbucks and i’m interviewing. No time to even check my mic or internet, the call was so shit i could not hear anything, they neither because the plaza was loud af. Meanwhile im nervous about work, about the interview, about can they hear me at all because of the noise. I fucked it up. BIG time! I was so done i could not reverse a fucking string in c++ or explain what is a signed int!!!
Needless to say they said no.
Need time to think about it or realize what happened? Nice dreams. Back to the office and continue working.
I can’t do this anymore. My girlfriend came for me and took me home at 10pm but all i could do was stare at the floor on the subway. I don’t want people to lose their jobs but i just phisically can’t do this anymore.
Meanwhile any time i talk to my project manager about being tired he says like “hshshsbsb i have 60 hours in the last 4 days i got the worst part, i would be grateful in your place..” like fuck off dude, i dont give fuck about how you feel about this. This is not okay for me, you did this to the project, your fucking job is to manage it! I have one day off before going back to this, i have completely no idea what to do now...
[ps: this is not Nemesys. They did not let me work on my own stuff because i would be a competitor, so i left.]5 -
"There's more to it"
This is something that has been bugging me for a long time now, so <rant>.
Yesterday in one of my chats in Telegram I had a question from someone wanting to make their laptop completely bulletproof privacy respecting, yada yada.. down to the MAC address being randomized. Now I am a networking guy.. or at least I like to think I am.
So I told him, routers must block any MAC addresses from leaking out. So the MAC address is only relevant inside of the network you're in. IPv6 changes this and there is network discovery involved with fandroids and cryphones where WiFi remains turned on as you leave the house (price of convenience amirite?) - but I'll get back to that later.
Now for a laptop MAC address randomization isn't exactly relevant yet I'd say.. at least in something other than Windows where your privacy is right out the window anyway. MAC randomization while Nadella does the whole assfuck, sign me up! /s
So let's assume Linux. No MAC randomization, not necessary, privacy respecting nonetheless. MAC addresses do not leak outside of the network in traditional IPv4 networking. So what would you be worried about inside the network? A hacker inside Starbucks? This is the question I asked him, and argued that if you don't trust the network (and with a public hotspot I personally don't) you shouldn't connect to it in the first place. And since I recall MAC randomization being discussed on the ISC's dhcp-users mailing list a few months ago (http://isc-dhcp-users.2343191.n4.nabble.com/...), I linked that in as well. These are the hardcore networking guys, on the forum of one of the granddaddies of the internet. They make BIND which pretty much everyone uses. It's the de facto standard DNS server out there.
The reply to all of this was simply to the "don't connect to it if you don't trust it" - I guess that's all the privacy nut could argue with. And here we get to the topic of this rant. The almighty rebuttal "there's more to it than that!1! HTTPS doesn't require trust anymore!1!"
... An encrypted connection to a website meaning that you could connect to just about any hostile network. Are you fucking retarded? Ever heard of SSL stripping? Yeah HSTS solves that but only a handful of websites use it and it doesn't scale up properly, since it's pretty much a hardcoded list in web browsers. And you know what? Yes "there's more to it"! There's more to networking than just web browsing. There's 65 THOUSAND ports available on both TCP and UDP, and there you go narrow your understanding of networking to just 2 of them - 80 and 443. Yes there's a lot more to it. But not exactly the kind of thing you're arguing about.
Enjoy your cheap-ass Xiaomeme phone where the "phone" part means phoning home to China, and raging about the Google apps on there. Then try to solve problems that aren't actually problems and pretty vital network components, just because it's an identifier.
</rant>
P.S. I do care a lot about privacy. My web and mail servers for example do not know where my visitors are coming from. All they see is some reverse proxies that they think is the whole internet. So yes I care about my own and others' privacy. But you know.. I'm old-fashioned. I like to solve problems with actual solutions.11 -
Had an interview with a local recruiting company for a series of jobs they posted. It started with two of their interviewers casually talking to me at a Starbucks. After a while they realized I met the criteria for one of their own job postings so they texted their boss who came down to the coffee shop about five minutes later. Which is when it got weird. She asked me regular questions about the job, then started asking me about non work stuff. She was sitting next to me at a 4 person table. We talked a little about hobbies, I'm really into biking so we talked about that. Which is when it got super weird, she felt my leg up and ran her hand around my chest. I didn't even think anything of that until the interview ended honestly, but it's freaked me out until this day. Never had an interview like that before. Ironically, I didn't get the job, and if I would have gotten the offer it would have had to have been really really good to take it. She gave me the heebie jeebies despite being attractive, who does that, in an interview none the less.4
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So im @ a starbucks, mindin my own fucking business doing work shit when this bitch sit down at my table tryna get my dick like eat shit im working lmao17
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"One misstep from developers at Starbucks left exposed an API key that could be used by an attacker to access internal systems and manipulate the list of authorized users," according to the report of Bleeping Computer.
Vulnerability hunter Vinoth Kumar reported and later Starbucks responded it as "significant information disclosure" and qualified for a bug bounty. Along with identifying the GitHub repository and specifying the file hosting the API key, Kumar also provided proof-of-concept (PoC) code demonstrating what an attacker could do with the key. Apart from listing systems and users, adversaries could also take control of the Amazon Web Services (AWS) account, execute commands on systems and add or remove users with access to the internal systems.
The company paid Kumar a $4,000 bounty for the disclosure, which is the maximum reward for critical vulnerabilities.6 -
One day when i'm working in starbucks enjoying my coffee and music. suddenly random stranger came to me and ask what am i working on, so i told him i was working on my website project. and my first thought was this guy apparently a developer too, and turns out i need to drop that away as far as i can. since he said he using VS-Code (what i use) since 2012 -_-.5
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Einstein supposedly has a quote attributed to him: "Perfection isn't achieved when there is nothing left to add, but when there is nothing left to remove."
I find that I aggressively refactor code where I can to only what is absolutely required. It does also have the knock on effect of reducing scope of bugs, when the code is smaller there's only so many places bugs can be.
Tesla claimed to have the ability to create designs in his head and only built things once he was satisfied that it worked in theory first, now it's rare I can do that, but I will use a repl to prototype or test modules in isolation before just hacking on the actual code.
Jobs, I mean, I know he didn't code but he was always insisting on designs that looked good and was generally uncompromising in his design centric view.
My friend, she was my Starbucks barista for a while but I've slowly been teaching her code and she's taught me a lot about how to teach others to code, she also happens to be my favourite student.3 -
Took me a year after graduation to land a job that stuck. Submitted about 100 job applications, most of which were immediate or semi-immediate denials. Got through one screen call and one technical call with Google before getting passed on. I did two technicals with G.E. where I really thought I knew my stuff...but didn't make the cut. I finally landed a job with a contractor for the Department of Defense, but my clearance was going to take over a year to finish, so they let me go after a couple weeks.
Every day, I would sit at Starbucks for eight hours; four of which, I would apply for jobs and practice for interviews. The other four I would self-medicate on Steam and wonder if the last six years of schooling was worth it. I was ready to move out of state and/or cut my losses to find a new industry when I was blessed with my current job.
For anyone going through what I did, don't jump straight to doubting your skills. Breaking in to an industry can be very hard. Have patience, keep getting better at what you do, and be open to opportunities. 💯👍 -
I am sitting at Starbucks trying to focus and finish some posts for my side project. The lady at the next table has been loudly 😁talking about her Disney trip in excruciating detail. Do we really have to know she will store her bagel and tuna fish in the hotel room fridge - really!
30 minutes in and she is just getting to the hotel - yikes 😫
No other seats open. I am trapped. Project deliverable delay - reason loud lady.
I was going to do this as a speech to text post but too nice to do that. HELP!2 -
The new CTO promised us better coffee in his introduction meeting. Honestly felt pretty trivial and part of his used car salesman pitch to us.
A month goes buy and he replaces our shitty drip Starbucks breakfast blend coffee with ... Starbucks coffee machines. I shit you not these things have touch screens on them. So I tried two cups of each bean type and ... this stuff is really really bad. It's literally worse than the drip brew. It's so fucking terrible I have trouble finishing a cup.
God damn it!8 -
My mom is amazing, bought one of this for me to try and Limon concentrate because I love lemon juice3
-
I can get a lot more done working in Starbucks, than from my own desk at work or home. Wonder if anyone else is the same way5
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I'm tired of meth. I mean math. MATH.
I'm sick and tired of everything.
"First!" numerous blog comments shout to no-one, from the colorful abyss of the internet.
And for me, this is a first. But lets rewind.
It's 2 AM, about a month ago, spring in Akron Ohio. Someone reading this is no doubt shocked "You just revealed where you live, ON THE INTERNET! The weirdos will find you." Anyway, it's a dark and stormy night, as the cliche goes. Like most people up after midnight, I'm browsing facebook posts and useless productivity sites. (lifehacker)
I yearn for something more out of life, somewhere deep down inside..maybe in my colon?
All the articles are saying "10 tips to supercharge your life", "how to discover your life purpose in three easy steps", mixed with an ad about ron jeremys one secret tip to grow a massive cock, and exhortations to buy such-and-such's "new ebook!"
I am not moved by any of this.
Scrolling, and tabbing, and intermittently dropping f-bombs because of js ads locking up my browser, I stop and lean back. In the blue afterglow of my shitty compaqs screen, a thought appears, like a cheesy genie, popping out of a brass toilet. "Start a blog! A youtube channel! A podcast" the ad proclaims. "Yes. Thats what I have to do" I whispered (I'm embarrassed to admit I really did say this).
Then I Control+W'd out of it, and flopped onto my mattress. This was the wasteland of my life. I couldn't help but think The whole internet was like some seedy back alley 2.0, where boxcar willie with his train of needle marks had been replaced by more upstart, greasy-haired gurus. Each peddling 'ebooks' of 'advice', stuffed in between ads to buy 'this one hot stock you have to own' and porn. And that alley was really the 'blogosphere' and 'youtubers'. As I drifted off, the last thought was 'We're all just bottom feeders,leeching and whoring on the attention of faceless anonymous users, hoping for another quick fix.'
I fell asleep, these racing thoughts fading into sweet oblivion, but never too far away.
Welcome to My Back Alley
That title is only twice as dirty, and half as thought-out as I planned. As you imagine, the lure of being the electronic equivalent of a conman never quite faded. And the more I read, the stronger the message "Start a youtube channel!" grew. As if everyone and their grandmother having a youtube channel would somehow make the world right, cure cancer, and save kittens from animal shelter gas chambers. Everyones an expert, everyones an agent of change. Maximizing productivity, Evangelizing Technology, ninjas collaborating to socialfy your community diversification benchmark for target traffic
through user-engagement and authentic grass-roots, blah, blah, blah, blah, money. Thrusting, moaning, screaming. Money. Pumping at the center of it all.
Wake up and smell the bullshit.
This blog is not a blog. This blog is the anti-blog, and we are the anti-streamers. 'We' (read "I") resist your bullshit lingo bingo, call out the Truth (Tm) and refuse to be satisfied with any standards of decency, journalistic integrity, or common sense.
Every blog, every channel, every podcast is Starbucks And I'm tyler durden, pissing in your coffee, and calling it a 'latte'.
Freaks, and anarchists, laymen and losers. If you feel as I do, then this is the place for you. Welcome to devrant.11 -
Closed MBP and left. Returned to office. Head to a very quiet Starbucks. Open MBP lip. Greeted with a woman's moan. F-ING COWORKERS!
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! rant
I met a super interesting developer guy today in London in Starbucks and we talked a lot about programming and the Full Stack conference, he also has devRant, I hope he sees this post and adds me!4 -
Recently I won a Qwiklabs speedrun with global rank 1.They gave me a $25 starbucks Egift card ! Nice right!?
NO.
Supposedly this can be only be redeemed in US.
Its always super irritating when you win some swag or voucher but always end up not able to get it due to residence in a Different Country.
P.S They are trying to resolve it. Its been forever since.4 -
This hurricane fucking sucks. My power was out nearly all day today. It went out at 6ish this morning, and didn't come back on until 4-5ish in the afternoon.
I was coding on my laptop, trying to reproduce the sampling procedures we talked about in AP stats (hoping that I'd better understand the material if I could connect it to stuff I was doing in another class), and there was a piece of syntax I had forgotten over the summer, and it irritated the hell out of me that I couldn't just Google the answer.
Eventually I just drove to a Starbucks and hung out there for about an hour or two till the power came back on. I was terrified the power would just go out again before I got back home.3 -
https://youtube.com/watch/...
A day in the life of a paypal dev.
1. Slurp some starbucks
2. Do a lil' Meeting
3. Eat lunch
4. 1on1 Meeting with manager for one hour
5. Scroll over some code and look at the beautiful Momentum ToDo app
6. Bid some employee farewell (seems to happen every day there apparently)
Sounds pretty efficient. When you write no code you cannot create any bugs...3 -
I can't get any shit done when trying to work in a public place, like in class or at Starbucks or frankly anywhere where people can (and will) look at my screen, as they'll inevitably think, "what the fuck is this guy doing?"1
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So for Father's Day I bought my dad premium coffee (Single Origin, Now Bottle Voyager pack). Very expensive even compared to Starbucks...
We brewed a few but they taste like crap. I thought he was doing it wrong. So today I dropped by the store and brought myself a cup that they made to see how the pros do it...
Well this is what I got for $5... And it also tastes like crap...
So now my question is do we actually like drinking coffee or non-carbonated sugar water that we call coffee?42 -
I probably dont balance it well. I spend majority of my day either reading code, reading about code, or writing it. I would say my balance comes on the weekends. I hang out with my girl more and I not in front of the computer as much. But even on the weekends I sneak in a few hours of code. My leisure time is literally sitting at a starbucks with my favorite text editor listening to a playlist and coding. That's like total zen for me.
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Oh thanks Windows. I wasn't working. And that Windows 10 upgrade I very specifically confirmed as cancelled ... yeah, go ahead and start that installation with no warning, while I'm working, sitting at a Starbucks that will eventually close and cutoff my ready access to power on a device with limited battery life, probably before you finish the update.
I don't mind sitting here twiddling my thumbs while you do your thing ...
Not that I didn't plan to upgrade, I actually like Windows 10 ... but it wasn't on the agenda for this particular moment.
o.O2 -
Every morning now you’ll see me at a Starbucks with a larger hot water pouring instant coffee packets into it
I’m not ashamed
Even if I was was rich I wouldn’t pay 15.00 for a fucking coffee lol
I call it a Starbucks workaround lol35 -
Term: Lie in
Definition: Those 2 or 3 hours extra my girlfriend sleeps while I go to Starbucks and get some work done. Currently watching web development lectures. -
My best friend's ex is really cool. But while they were dating, I was a bit frustrated, mainly because he was interested in many things she wasn't.
One thing that annoyed me was that his major is computer science, and her major is medical research.
GIRL, IF ONLY YOU WERE ALSO MAJORING IN COMPUTERS. YOU CAN ASK THE GUY FOR HELP WITH YOUR ASSIGNMENTS. EXPLOIT HIIIIM. HAVE COFFEE DATES AT STARBUCKS AND CODE TOGETHEEER. HIT TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE7 -
Guys, I'm maintaining an iOS project. I've never written any Swift code before or had any experience with this at least. Should I kill me self?6
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Gonna be basic af here:
1) Let me use the latest version of my language of choice + libraries
2) Unlimited decent coffee (not starbucks but not folgers either)
3) A nice private office with a door so I can be uber productive if necessary. -
I'd really wish girls/women knew how fucking annoying it is when they are speaking loudly with each other at the company toilets, and stays there for 5-10 minutes to discuss what they did this weekend.
There are only two things I want/need to poop: SILENCE! and my phone.
I don't need the feeling of sitting in the middle of a Starbucks while taking a shit. -
<rant class="question">
hey dev's that get coffee at Starbucks what does it mean if the girl taking the order has a chat with you remember you Everytime you get there and write a additional enjoy your front with a smile?
a friend of me says she likes me but I'm still not sure.
</rant>8 -
Well today i went to grab a coffee at starbucks saw my best friend working decided to buy him one too i sit down we start talking and i saw him using visual studio code and asked him why don't you use vim and answered "vim is for programmers that don't know what to do with their life and cant decide what ide they like" i didn't think twice and slapped the shit out of him fuck him. I think i might need a new best friend.12
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WHY DO I STUMBLE TO REDISCOVER THAT IF I HAVE SQLITESTUDIO OPEN MY DML STATEMNST FAIL FROM MY PROGGY BECAUSE IT IS HOLDING ON TO THE WRITE ENABLED FD ????
WHY WOULD THEY NOT HAVE A MECHANISM IN THE LIB WHICH HANDLED CONCURRENCY ???
WHY AM I DOING THIS AGAIN ?
AND WHY IS THE SAME TRASH SITTING IN STARBUCKS LIKE THE CHICK THAT WALKED THROUGH SHOWCASING SOMETHING TO HIM OR THE OTHER FUCKING AGING PROST BITCH WHO ARE ALL RELATIVELY NEW TO ME.
FEEL LIKE SOMEONE PLAYED A TRICK.
OH WAIT THEY DID
AND WHY AM I IN STARBUCKS ? LOL I AM NOT A HIPSTER !2 -
Not slapping someone when they call an object a thing or worse a thingy, it's like working with basic Starbucks bitches
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I have not used a lot of technology, but among the worst experiences was working with OR mapper. I don't think OR mappers are bad by themselves, but all the tutorials and entry level documentation drag the unknowing user slowly into a world of hurt. It looks super easy and super cool, but in fact if you don't know _exactly_ what's happening in the background you're about to deal with slow performance, terrible SQL statements, missing indices, etc. It makes shooting yourself in the foot a Starbucks-like experience, everywhere, all the time, and fast.
It's one of those promises that do not deliver the easy way despite most people advertising it like this. Except when you plan to write a book'n'author application with only 5 books and 3 authors. Yeah... -
I like Mac but it’s annoying how it went from a product aimed mainly to a technical (in early 2000s OS X presentations were rich of in-depth details) or creative audience to a product aimed mainly to hypebeasts, basic Starbucks girl and tech illiterates which believes which sending a file trough Wi-Fi is cutting edge technology.
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Thank you crappy Starbucks app requiring me to refill my Starbucks card in order to pay via the app.
I was first going to rant but this "feature" saved from buying food that actually looks like crap in the store...
Long version: I got an email about the birthday reward (free any side (Large) drink) a few days ago so redeemed it this morning via the app. I sorta felt bad so added a dessert roll so that I would pay something.
Well at the checkout it said need to pay by Store Card.... Under that, it listed my credit card and refill amount. Well WHY THE FUCK CAN'T I JUST USED MY CARD. I am not a regular customer but hey it's $6 for the drink. Anyway so I removed and now it keys me check out without a refill.
Then dragged my ass out of bed because somehow I accidentally ordered... walked to the store. Wanted to order but then saw the actual food and was like "ok let's just get my coffee..."
Picks it up at the pickup spot and quietly walks out looking at all the people in the store wondering why they like this stuff.
The coffee was just like McDonald's to me...4