This happened at my previous job where I worked for a dating app. It was at a time where the CEO was trying to turn the dating app into “more than a dating app” by adding tons of social features. We always had “interests” which allowed users to see what interests they had in common with another person, but he wanted to take the social component even further.

So with that, he decided we needed an “activity feed.” The activity feed would show what various Facebook connected users were liking on Facebook, posting on Facebook, etc. On a dating app. Where the majority of the audience was > 50 years old. The idea was absolutely ridiculous and everyone but the CEO knew it was destined for failure before we started building it.

But that’s not the best part. The best part was when we launched the activity feed component. We launched it late on day and went home shortly after. The next morning, we came in, and checked on the activity feed to see what was doing. It was literally all spammers liking porn/sex related stuff on Facebook. It was a complete disaster. All garbage but not just boring garbage - completely obscene garbage.

And just like that, the activity feature came and went in the course of a few days.

In the middle of my workout and all I can focus on is this treadmill display's terrible UI... Looks like a zoom button but actually increases the speed.

You know you're a front-end dev when...

Got into the monday tech meeting, CTO be like: we lost 10% of users due to last version, terrible I know, but that's really valuable data, I want you to find out why they left.

Some terrible CSS humor for ya

Linux user on a Windows machine: "ugh, this is terrible."
Windows user on a Linux machine: "I don't know what I'm doing."

I committed a terrible sin. I didn't have time for my portfolio site, so I used...

WordPress 😫

tl;dr Yes, we know the standard for RAM is getting higher; no, that doesn't mean you can increase your app's RAM usage for no good reason.

Homemade, terrible comic.

Confession:
I actually like to code with JavaScript.

It's a terrible language, yes, but I find it fun to work with.

everything has a terrible api unless you made it yourself

Her: What do you do?
Me: I'm writing my thesis on bringing AI to smartphones.
Her: I think AI is terrible!
Me: oh, you are an engineer too?
Her: No
Me: oh, you've studied economics and or ethics and are worried about its implications on society?
Her: No, but have you?
Me: I have a degree in economics, an MBA and an now about to get my BSc in CS.
Her: well, regardless I still think it's terrible.
Me: well in that case how about you shove your unfounded opinion where the sun don't shine!

Today I learned that "wtf" means "what a terrible failure" in Android development 😂😂

JavaScript is like Voldemort. It can do great things. Terrible things! But great!

Today I was searching Android docs and found something interesting:

To write Android log statements, you use the android.util.Log class with the following methods:

Log.v()

Log.d()

...

Log.wtf() 😮😮😮

According to Google it seems to mean "What a Terrible Failure".

WTF?!?!?!

My boss expects me to create an android application like Instagram just in 1 day ... 😂😂
it's terrible that your boss doesn't have any knowledge about programming...😥

An app that lets you turn on the camera on someone's laptop to see if they're around. I'm not even kidding. She said it would be a social media thing... creeper.

Just who the fuck from apple thought its a good idea to make the FUCKING SCROLL BAR overlap, the FUCKING PROPERTY ARROWS, everytime i accidentaly hover over it? I cant change shit! I have to wait few seconds every time i accidentaly hover over the scrollbar so i can be able to FUCKING CHANGE the value!

Dear Apple Inc,

Fix your shit! We're paying 100$ a year for what? More bugs and toruture? I didnt sign up for this bullshit! Give us back some real quality products, or just buy the company Jetbrains and let them build the IDE for you instead.

Too real.

This is why places like CodeAcademy are terrible

Let's play a little game.
Your code has been overwritten.

I just found out that there is a method in Java/Android called "Log.wtf()" which stands for...

... What a Terrible Failure!
Don't believe me? See for yourselves! (way to go, guys!)

When everyone is complaining about how terrible JavaScript is and I'm just sitting there thinking "but... I like it.."

a client wants a nice clean website that doesn't look like it's 10 years old. then they ask for like everything that made the old site terrible

!!pointless story

Bug report comes in from a coworker. "Cloudinary uploads aren't working. I can't sign up new customers."

"I'll look into it" I say.

I go to one of our sites, and lo! No Cloudinary image loads. Well that can't be good.

I check out mobile app -- our only customer-facing platform. None of the images load! Multiple "Oops!" snackbars from 500 errors on every screen / after every action.

"None of our Cloudinary images load, even in the mobile app," I report.

Nobody seems to notice, but they're probably busy.

I go to log into the Cloudinary site, and realize I don't have the credentials.

"What are the Cloudinary credentials, @ceo?" I ask.

I'm met with more silence. I use this opportunity to look through the logs, try different URLs/transforms directly. Oddly, everything seems fine except on our site.

I check Slack again, and see nothing's changed, so I set about trying to guess the credentials.

Let's see... the ceo is basically illiterate when it come to tech, so it's probably not his email. It's a startup, and custom emails for things cost money, and haven't been a thing here forever, so it's probably oen of the CTO's email aliases. he likes dots and full names so that narrows it down. Now for the password.... his are always crappy (so they're "easy to remember") and usually have the abbreviated company name in them. He also likes adding numbers, generally two-digit numbers, and has a thing for 7s and 9s. Mix in some caps, spaces, order...

Took me a few minutes, but I managed to figured it out.

"Nevermind, I guessed them." I reported.

After getting into Cloudinary, I couldn't find anything amiss. Everything looked great. No outage warnings, metrics looked fine, images all loaded. Ex-cto didn't revoke payment or cancel the account.

I checked our app; everything started loading -- albeit slowly.

I checked the aforementioned site; after a few minutes, everything loaded there, too.

Not sure what else to do, and with everything appearing to work, I said "Fixed!" and closed the issue.

About 20 minutes later, the original person said "thanks" -- never did hear anything from the ceo. I've heard him chatting away in the other room the entire time.

Regardless, good thing for crappy passwords, eh?

Slept terrible the entire week due to a fucking annoying cold.

My turn of being the on call server engineer for a week starts tomorrow.

😭

Why is it formatted like this? Cant they just do a \n on a capital Letter? This looks so terrible😢

the official Android documentation says it stands for "What a Terrible Failure"...sure it does Google, sure it does....

When you're called in to fix another developer's terrible work.

My team member just rewrote all of my code and it looks beautiful and it works but and now i feel like I'm a terrible programmer :'(

I hate all of these rants about JavaScript being a terrible language.

In reality, it's one of the easiest languages to work with. This makes it easier for new programmers to write messy code, but is it the language's fault?

People get mad about the things that happen when you multiply "undefined" and a string...what do you expect?

You also have the freedom to choose from a variety of tools the community has created to solve existing problems. People just don't realize that they don't *have* to learn everything, you just learn as you need them.

Don't blame JavaScript for you bad programming, terrible type conversion needs, and great tooling.

How on Earth has PHP became successful? That language is as terrible as Satan's balls

Update 2:
Second update, second terrible quality gif!
Keyboard controls working over a web server!
Also there's loads less latency now since I'm using websockets :)

VP: We're going to have HR join the call.
Me: Okay. *Shrug*
(HR Joins)
VP: I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go. I'll need you to return your laptop.
Me: Okay. *Shrug*
VP: ...
HR: ...
HR: Do you want to know why we're letting you go?
Me: Nah. Bye.

After five years of working in terrible conditions for terrible to mediocre people, I accepted losing my job without worry. In a way, I was thankful.

I wanted to quit so many times.

I'm much happier these days.

Last Friday company-wide call consisted of the sales CEO bossman, the remote contractor dev, and myself. The only topic of discussion was CTO-bashing (bossman's favorite). Neither person had much of anything to say about their week, and they didn't want to hear my rather-lengthy summary either (I did a lot). All they wanted to do was bash the CTO (API Guy).

The CEO asked how many hours I had worked, and seemed annoyed when I said less than 40. Well screw you. Monday was Christmas, and Sunday was Encroaching Estranged Asshole Day. (Earlier rant)

I've been spending most of my time trying to learn the steaming mountain of rancid hippo shit that API Guy squeezed out, since he's leaving forever in 10 days. Sure, CEO bossman says he'll still be around to answer questions, but even with him right next to me in the office he's less than useful. After he's gone and finally feeling free of this farce? It'll be worth fuck-all.

So bossman is mad at me for both not working enough over Christmas, and not pumping out features at a frantic pace despite multiple explanations of why this is a bad idea. And he didn't care about what work I actually did do.

My every interaction with him makes me angry. Whenever I -- or anyone else -- does something he doesn't approve of, seemingly no matter the reasoning, he makes it out to be a failure on their part, and like he can't trust them as much now.

Well I'm sorry we're trying to make sure our websocket works perfectly before putting it in the hands of our customers who rely on it for cash processing.

I'm sorry I'm trying to recall printers that aren't configured properly, which also prevent customers from using our goddamn service they're paying for.

I'm sorry I'm trying to learn how everything works while I still have someone to talk to and ask questions of.

I'm sorry I'm preparing for the day I have to take over and have you breathing down my neck. Once API Guy's gone I'll be responsible for everything, and you'll be yelling at me and having a @Root bashing session instead if I don't know how to fix everything right away.

But no. All you care about is that I talk to you about what's going in so you can micromanage development despite having zero fucking understanding of goddamn anything. All you ever fucking want is the next shiny feature you can push to make more sales / keep your current contacts happy. Doesn't fking matter if it makes development awful later; that's tomorrow's problem. And yet you have the gall to bash API Guy over and over and over again for the codebase being a mess? Sure he's a terrible programmer, but been putting up with this exact same shit for five years. No wonder it's a mountain of rancid hippo shit. That's as much your fault as his, asshole.

I'm so sorry you "have serious concerns" about me. I don't want to put up with your shit either.

Fuck off and die.

So the CSS code I'm working on has a terrible vertical alignment problem on every browser except IE11. Using `display: flex` =_=

I'm not joking this alignment glitch is driving me nuts! Deadline tomorrow.

Why is text selection on touchscreens still so goddamn terrible?

Just got a merge request to review. It's TERRIBLE

- 93 changes
- 23 commits
- includes multiple features
- includes new project configs
- includes refactoring

NO. Please don't do that.

Do smaller commits. One feature per MR. It will help you and the reviewer :D

Read Clean Code and came to the realization that I'm a terrible person to everyone who had to read my work.

Started new job with presentation at 10:00. Went for lunch at 11:00. Was given access to source code at 12:00. Decided to quit at 13:00.

No regrets. Code was so bad that I wanted to cry.

Let me explain a tiny corner of some awful code I read earlier today, in layman’s terms.

It’s a method to see if the user is in a secure session — not to set up the session, just to see if it exists. The method ends with a question mark, so it’s basically a question. It should look up the info (without changing anything) and should always give a clear yes/no answer. Makes sense, right?

Let’s say the question is “am I in school right now?”

The code… well.

If there isn’t a student, the answer it gives is null, not yes or no. Null is a fancy word for no, pretty much, so that’s kinda fine, but it really should be a simple no.

It then checks to see if the school is open today. If it is open, it then checks to see if I made my lunch, if I took my backpack, and if I rode the bus — and makes these things happen if they didn’t. Forgot my backpack? Just ask “am I in school today?” And poof! There’s my backpack! … but only if the school is open.

It then, finally, checks to see if I’m actually in the school, and gives that answer.

It could just see if I’m in the school — I mean, I could be in school without a backpack, or walked there on the weekend, right? Ha! You and your silly logic have no place here.

So, by asking if the user is in a secure session, we change the answer: they weren’t before, but the act of asking makes it so. This isn’t profound or anything: I don’t work with Schrödinger. My coworkers are just idiots.

And no, the rest of the code isn’t any better…

!rant

Sooo... I didn't posted a thing in a while sooo.

I GRADUATED YESTERDAY WUHUUU
(I hope used the word graduate right)

Today my first day, still in Germanys biggest (and most hated) IPS as an planner of new telecommunication routes (love planning fiber)

I hope I can still dev, at least I am able to spend more money on tools I don't even need ❤️❤️

I feel terrible today. My life doesn't have any purpose! I think it's time....

To install Kali Linux as my main system and start learning Brainfuck

docker documentation is terrible. Mf'ers seem allergic to giving actual functional examples.

Watch me generate a 1-to-1 copy of the docker compose docs (real & true):

`docker compose --help > docs.html`

Me: I have terrible life, terrible job and I will kill my boss.

Someone: just think positive.

Me: oh thanks

Went on an interview and the woman literally counted out loud each minute that went by as I tried to write some code.

Has anyone ever donated a website and its maintenance/hosting to a charity?
There's a pet rescue/homing RSPCA centre near me and their website is terrible. I keep thinking about doing this for them.
Thoughts?

I hate it when people dislike things because it’s cool.

“PHP is terrible,” they say.

Yeah! If it was any good then most websites on the Internet would be coded in it... oh wait.

“Nickelback suck,” they say.

Of course. That’s why they’ve never been able to make any money off their “terrible” music. Oops. Wrong again.

What other things are “cool” to hate just because people say so?

FUCK LINUX

now that I have your attention, and you’re probably angry, too, please, even if you don’t read this rant, never use code.org again. now, onto the rant…

god dammit, code.org sucks. I mean, anyone who created it or associates with it should, well, be considered a terrorist. they’re bombing students futures in computer science with false, useless, bullshit information. not to mention, their sponsors like bill gates, mark zuckerburg, and other rich asses, talk in a video about some boring ass shit that is hard to understand for anyone who doesn’t program, and not to mention, they use a fucking five dollar microphone. ear rape. even if you look at a textual version of it, then read the information on it, it’s practically useless because it's so terribly explained, and also useless. ironically enough, they focus on their animations more than their actual explinations, or their students for that matter. the fact that we had to encode a picture in binary, made me about 50% dumber, give or take a 0 or 1. then, we had to do it in hex, which wasn’t really much better, although more realistic I supposed. what's really the most depressing thing about this class is its application in the real world. I've learnt nothing whatsoever that will help me in the real world, or in computer science. I suppose there's two things that may be useful (that I already knew): hex, and that TCP doesn't lose packets. that's it. those two things. five seconds worth of knowledge from the first quarter of the year. the ideas just make me want to throw up. teaching the main ideas of computer science without actually teaching it? one of the teachers (probably a good one) enrolled her students in an online programming course just so they could understand, because the explanations are just so terrible. this is the only [high school] computer science course offered by code.org, and I signed up because it's an AP computer science class (tried to get into AP Java, the day I was supposed to take the test to get into an upper level class, I was told it didn't count as a tech credit). seriously, fuck code.org. it makes you dumber. their 'app lab' environment is pointless, just like everything else. the app lab is basically where you have a set of commands and have to make a dog bark() or a storm trooper miss() [and that's hell when they haven't introduced while loops yet]. the app lab is literally code.org going out of their way to make everything that their students are learning pointless in the real world. seriously, why can't we just use a <canvas> like an ACTUAL PROGRAMMER would do if they were to make a browser game, not use an app engine so slow it would be faster to update windows and android studio each time I run an 'app' in their 'environment'. their excuse is that the skills "transfer over" to the real world. BITCH! IF I DIDN'T KNOW JAVA, AND I WANTED TO MAKE A GAME IN JAVA, I'M NOT GOING TO LEARN PYTHON, THEN "TRANSFER" THE SKILLS I LEARNT, I'M GOING TO LEARN FUCKING JAVA. AND THAT GOES FOR EVER OTHER LANGUAGE, PROJECT, ETC.

I'm begging you code.org, stop, get help.

If the requirements are this stringent in the job posting, I can't imagine how terrible it would be to work for this person.

There's a strong correlation between the people that think Windows 10 is 'terrible', and those that take a photograph of their monitor using their phone.

I feel strange, because I don't have nothing to rant about... I work with awesome people, and my life is not so terrible... What the fuck I'm doing on devRant?

Uhm... maybe I'm the boss who everyone is ranting about...

Been away from devrant for almost 8 months, and all these months the app was sitting idle on my phone.

Now, since I am part of industry and have a terrible boss, I am back to throw some anger

"Ah no, reusable frameworks and libraries are a terrible idea. What you need is a bunch of very lightweight files that you can copy / paste from project to project"

- Mobile Architect, Large m.n.c, 10+ years experience.

I feel terrible making $3,634/year at my current job in Nigeria with all my skills and experience.
I've applied for jobs in Germany and had a couple of interviews but they fell through.

It's difficult been a software engineer in Nigeria. 😔

Story of WTF happened to my job

During my employment in (name censored) was stressful, They claimed I didn't complete my task on time which they constantly remove me from git and documentation(which have to follow their style of returning data), I kept emailing, slack, WhatsApp calls them, mostly and predictably got ghosted and blocked.

So How the fuck am I supposed to push my code or code without the documentation (I can actually, prevent refactoring every time, following the documentation is the good way to go.)

On the sprint review, they will complain about me not committing and pushing the code. (I did commit locally, but can't push, they removed me from the fucking repo) and not done.

Tried reasoning, telling the obvious reasons with them, doesn't work. They come out the second reason of me "NOT COMMUNICATING". Sometimes I can get to git merge from dev to my branch and get tonnes of fucked up code. I reviewed the code, and I can't tolerate it.

Lately, I overheard them mocking and cheering me about to get fired over a zoom meeting (I was in there, they forgot to remove me). Their conversation is about me being a coloniser, a jerk, betraying Chinese ancestors for being not Chinese enough.

I was like: "Why the fuck does their conversation sound like they are tucked in the Qin dynasty?"

Frequently I got labelled as unprofessional.

How is cussing about my ancestors, personal and life a professional behaviour?

If you ever fuck up really bad and it makes you feel terrible, just remember, a company once flooded a whole town in molasses, killing 21 people.

Oh God, oh fuck!! My bank!! That I don't bank with. It's DIsaBlEd!!!!! OH GOD OH FUcK MY MONEY!!! This is terrible, take my password!!!!! Have it!! I need to RESET THE DAMAGE OH GOD

I don't think I've ever had a bad drunk coding experience. Most of my nightmares involve being sober and doing this thing called "my job", which just seems like a terrible idea before I've even begun.

When will Amazon learn that I'M BRITISH! DONT FUCKING SHOIW ME PRICES IN FUCKING USD*, EVEN WHEN I'M ON THE FUCKING BRITISH SITE! WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO FUCKING SIGN OUT AND IN AGAIN EVERY FUCKING TIME TO REMIND IT!?

I'm just trying to buy a raspberry pi zero....

* I have nothing against USD, but I need to swear in order to vent my frustration.

This tattoo that combines two of my loves: tech and terrible puns.

I am a terrible designer. When i say terrible i mean my designs for website somehow always manage to look like an ugly piece of shit.

Halp?

lol, picking a pen after so many months of coding, i feel like my already terrible handwriting has gone even worse

I'm at a casino and can't stop thinking about how these terrible machines are programmed, and how likely I am to lose any money I bet.

I give MS a lot of cr@p for terrible API documentation, but even Google's API docs are pretty terrible to read through.

Seriously, guys... Your docs shouldn't read like an endless page of search results.

I can't help but think the red headphones in the avatar are Beats. Those are terrible headphones! PLEASE ADD SOME NON DECREPIT BLACK ONES.

It makes me angry every time I see them.

It's called VS code because it always u vs ur terrible code

These exploding samsungs really hit their "target" market.

Using a library with a terrible API.

Manage to convince management to purchase new library.

Using new library.

Slowly creeps in that new library has a terrible API.

Excuse me, but I think people are hacking into the queue - or that you are just terrible.

I wish this weren’t me, but it is. I’m terrible at my job.

As long as I suck at css, I will always have a terrible experience working with a designer.

Logging levels: Verbose, Debug, Info, Warning, Error, What a Terrible Failure

Oh look, you aren't doing shit. You have 2 weeks worth of testing to complete and you are checking out stories on the Yahoo front page.

Useless. Completely incompetent. Idiot. Imbecile. Moron. Stupid. How dense? Let me count the ways...

Do you know anything?! You use big words to sound important and look like you know your shit. In reality, you have no clue!

How you have managed to capture this job is baffling to me. It shows there is much work to be done to filter out toxic, incompetent people like you. Otherwise, the industry will be plagued with a terrible fear of sub-par employees.

Your lack of common decency for the office space is appalling. Your attitude and "can do no wrong" personality is disgusting. And the cherry on top? It is impossible for you to admit mistakes and take ownership for your actions. You can be inexperienced, stressed out, or even make a mistake once in a while. Yet, the moment you DO fuck up and act like nothing was your fault, that most of it was MY fault, or the TEST environment's fault, or the other team's fault, a lack of resources, a lack of time, ANYTHING but your own damn incompetence, you are dead to me.

You are, by far, the worst co-worker I have ever had.

Terrible week. Micromanagement killing all progress. The only positive note this week is that we got a new scent of soap.

Thank the gods I like citrus...

We did a small automated review on our code base at work. We discovered that multiple single functions written by my colleagues have a cyclomatic complexity of over 420.

I can't think of words to describe how shit that is.

yeah Google, What a Terrible Failure

Procrastinating

Just saw this in a production app. There's a reason no other language implemented VB's OnErrorResumeNext, BECAUSE IT'S A F***ING TERRIBLE IDEA.

Catch (exception e)
{
//not really an issue
Continue;
}

Programmers nowadays have to...
… write 100%-covering unit tests;
… set up continuous integration, linters, hinters, style checkers, …;
… follow style guides for every language;
… meet impossible deadlines;
… meet impossible management/customer/end user expectations;
… read through terrible code others made;
… read through terrible documentation others made;
… make terrible documentation themselves;
… fight with the IDE;
… fight with the build tools;
… deal with unreproducible crash reports coming in from everywhere;
… debug code written at 2am (by themselves AND others);
…
…
…
… KNOW HOW TO PROGRAM.

The security on my school computers is a joke.
The standard student accounts have no user rights, but the "guest" account has admin rights???
The teachers private data is not secured, it's just hidden from explorer, so if you manually type in the folder location into the explorer bar, you can access the teacher's data. Not to mention everything is running on Windows 7 machines from 10 years ago.

We learned Java in school this year. Everyone who did not comply to the coding style defined in some stone-age books, got a bad grade, including me, who rather used a "normal" style everyone uses. They thought us this:
CLASSNAMES, Constants, MethodNames, VariableNames, etc.
Worse than that, they used german names for pretty much everything including classes, variables and methods.

Cool, I got psx working great on arch :D Took a lot of tweaking but so far the graphics aren't too terrible and no popcorn sound xD which is surprising given the old hardware I'm using.

For some reason, I feel like I’m a terrible programmer. I really try :(

Some people refactor because feature updates need to be optimized throughout the code base.

I refactor because I am terrible at planning.

So, I forked this dude's terrible project. I faked commits like implementing some incompatible feature. He talks about it on the internet, as expected.

Should I tell him?
Or should I enjoy the show?

Terrible Dutch (!dev) tech pun I just came up with: (posted it earlier under the rant section but removed it due to that)

Wat moet een AMD CPU doen als'ie op vakantie gaat?

Ryzen.

To all ya guys who stuck with terrible boss/manager/project/coworkers.

*Today*
Me: coding is fun , la la la, nothing can go wrong~~ ♡
*moment later*
Me: ahhhhh my back!! Why was i sitting in that terrible unergonimic position

Moral of the story , practice good seating posture and you wont get muscle knots! ;-;

Wish Microsoft would open-source their secret UWP file explorer because even though it's terrible, they're doing things I can't figure out.

So I' working on a personal blog/site, but I'm a terrible designer. Any suggestions and/or opinions would be greatly appreciated!

I have the bad habit of programming without initializing a Github repo or by the time I upload it to Github I’m either done or close to done with it.

It’s not necessarily a terrible thing it’s just a pet peeve of mine.

Websites that show a notification dot the first time I visit with zero interaction from my end: I hope you die. This is terrible exploitation of UX, and unless I really need something, I'm leaving the site within seconds.

Unintuitive APIs, with poor documentation and terrible parameter names. It's like they don't want me to use it

Aaahh friday, terrible terrible week

Can interviewers PLEASE stop asking cliche and terrible questions??
Interviewer: "Where do you see yourself in five years?"
Me: "Not with you guys obviously, you dumb piece of shit."
That's what I'd like to say to them at least... :/

Bit the bullet and installed VS and relevant compilers for C++ and started fucking around with sdl.

Not as terrible as I thought it was going to be.
Pointers seem pretty intuitive. Apparently my time with python has not in fact mentally mutilated me.

Who else makes it a habit of (in most cases) upvoting the main post when they respond to it?

Unless it's just a terrible post but you had to say something.

But anything neutral and above I respond to, i++

No no no no no no

I am a terrible person.
When I write js I awlays put semicolons...except on callbacks

I played a terrible game tonight... I'm secondary on call when we've been getting 2+ calls regularly. I went out with friends and just hoped I didn't get a call.

A friend of mine wrote a Rubik's cube timer in c# as suggested by me for him to practice. This was so terrible....There were lines like:

start.Stop();

"Wtf windows is terrible you dont have a useful terminal"

Me: *installs cygwin*

Worst successful application (s) you've used? Things that make money despite being terrible at what they are supposed to be good at.

So I enventually spent 2 years working for that company with a strong b2b market. Everything from the checkouts in their 6 b2c stores to the softwares used by the 30-people sales team was dependant on the main ERP shit home-built with this monstruosity we call Windev here in France. If you don't know it just google and have some laugh : this is a proprieteray FRENCH language. Not french like made by french people, well that too, but mostly french like the fucking language is un fucking french ! Instructions are on french, everything. Hey that's my natural language okay, but for code, really ?

The php website was using the ERP database too, even all the software/hardware of the massive logistic installation they had (like a tiny Amazon depot), and of course the emails of all employees. Everything was just handled by this unique shitty and so sloooooow fucking app. When there was to many clients on the website or even too many salespeople connected to the ERP at the same time, every-fuckin-piece of the company was slowing down, and even worse facing critical bugs. So they installed a monitor in the corner of a desk constantly showing the live report page of Google analytics and they started panic attacks everytime it was counting more than 30 sessions on the website. That was at the time fun and sad to observe.

The whole shit was created 12 years ago and is since maintened locally by one unique old-fashion-microsoft dev who also have to maintain all the hardware of all the fucking 150+ people business. You know, when the keyboard of anyone is "broken" cause it's unplugged... That's his job too. The poor guy was totally overstressed on a daily basis and his tech knowledge just saddly losts themeselves somewhere in the way. He was my n+1 in a tech team of 3 people : him, a young and inexperimented so-called "php developer" who was in charge of the website (btw full of security holes I discovered and dealed with when I first arrive at the job), and myself.

The database was a hell of 100+ tables of business and marketing data with a ton of specific logic added on-the-go during years. No consistent data model or naming. No utf8. Fucked up relations that ends with queries long enough to fill books. And that's not all, all the customers passwords was just stored there uncrypted. Several very big companies and administrations were some of these clients. I was insisting on the passwords point litterally all the time, that was an easy security fix and a good start... But no, in two years of discussions on the subject I never achieved to have them focusing on other considerations than "our customers like that we can remind them their password by a simple phone call if they lost it". What. The. Fuck. WHATTHEFUCK!

Eventually I ran myself out of this nightmare. I had a few bad jobs already, and worked on shitty software already. But that one really blows my mind (and motivation for a time too). Happy it's over.

First time people have forked and stared one of my github repositories.
Kinda exciting, but also scary. (they're looking at my terrible code)

Came across this in a site work took on from another agency. Bad JS calculation of someone's age, there was many other terrible date manipulation parts throughout the site

starting to use everything on Incognito, with a VPN, and (thinking) of switching to TOR.
a heck of a privacy that will be, but the cost of the Speed(Bandwidth) will be terrible.

I'm a 35 year old developer and I can't figure out how the fuck mailchimp works. It might be that the whole thing is terrible, or I may just be a complete idiot. Oh, of course the api key is under profile>extras

The coffee here is so shitty, I have to drink lots of water to get rid of the terrible flavor that remains in my mouth every single time.

On the other hand, I'm very well hydrated.

Holy fuck js. And jQuery.
Your delay thingy is terrible!

The new CTO promised us better coffee in his introduction meeting. Honestly felt pretty trivial and part of his used car salesman pitch to us.

A month goes buy and he replaces our shitty drip Starbucks breakfast blend coffee with ... Starbucks coffee machines. I shit you not these things have touch screens on them. So I tried two cups of each bean type and ... this stuff is really really bad. It's literally worse than the drip brew. It's so fucking terrible I have trouble finishing a cup.

God damn it!

I seem to have terrible spelling when it comes to being on devRant, it's a curse!

But then again when I'm browsing devRant my code ends up cleaner... Hmmm

So I picked up learning perl.
Mostly using it for tooling and admin.

Kinda looks insane, but in a fun way.

Have I made a terrible mistake?

Going through some terrible shit in life atm.. Didn't open devRant for a while and sure as the sun the stream made me smile.. Thanks..

Why the hell is JS so terrible, and why do so many people resort to using is as a back end. So many packages, so many outdated dependencies. My coworkers and friends have heard me rant about my constant frustration with this terrible setup.

I understand the need for dynamic html but why have we bastardized this language to the extent we have.

Keep your projects up to date, it saves people a lot of trouble in the future.

The formatting was terrible, so I just took a screenshot instead. XD

I'm terrible at CSS

It's terrible how my mood is greatly dependent on whether my code works or not.

Feeling like shit at the moment.

I just found out that the company that i've just started contracting at has the entire of wordpress inside of a repo for quite a few of their sites.

Fuck me now.

Terrible..!

Manager who doesn't code makes all the technical decisions and doesn't listen to us, lowly developers. He only listened to the developer who has been the longest time in the company and had terrible ideas as well.

I would like to share my son's best joke so far.

Knock knock
Who's there?
The tower in France.
The tower in France who?
The tower in France, there's a man on top... it's Doctor who... Ooeeooo

Next year we start web developing in school. Everybody seems to despise it, but since I do not have much experience: Is it really that terrible developing for the www?

!dev
I like biking to places, but the roads are so terrible quality in Budapest (the capital city) that I can't sit down without risking getting sterilized.

Java, because it is a terrible language that plagues the world

Forcing the dev to be the only one doing QA should be considered animal cruelty. That's like making the plumber take a shit after every new toilet installation. That was a terrible analogy.

So I did an undergraduate degree in Physics and as part of that did a few courses involving c++. The classes were terrible ("make a class, it'll get you extra marks" kinda bad). I found them interesting but had the self awareness to know it was a terrible course. So fast forward a year and I'm following the MIT CS 001 video lectures and it clicks.

I've been a dev ever since. I've not let my mathematical background slip as it's bloody useful but I enjoy what I do day to day. For the most part.

Most days, I feel pretty good about my skill and contributions, but I still sometimes worry that I might be the cog with the terrible code that all my coworkers rant about.

Terrible. But still hilarious.

Help my browser has a memory leak...
"bleeding Edge"

Where do you score terrible dad jokes ? ...

In a dad-a-base

And on that terrible disappointment, it's time to nuke that macOS install!

It would be easier if instead of getting GTX 1050 Ti, I grabbed some Radeon...

WHY WOULD A LICENSE WORK FOR A BACKUP SOFTWARE ONCE, AND THEN NOT BE RECOGNIZED?!

I haaaaaaaaate shoddy license management.

Oh and Sage is an awful company with terrible software as well.

I have a friend which have a hoarding disorder when it comes to coding. Here are some of the things he does:

1: If he rewrites, remove, or in any other way refactor a function, then he keeps the old one in the file commented out.

2: If he deletes a class then he takes the code and paste it into a class that he have just for old code. AN ACTUAL CLASS! Not just some random text file somewhere. Even though it is commented out, he leaves it so that you can initiate his garbage.

3: In point 1, the code is not pasted on the end. It inside all the other actual code.

So if you try to help him with something, then you have to dig through a mountain of shit just to find some code.

When you're pitching to a whole team of clients at a resteraunt, and you find out a minute in that their WiFi is terrible. Pages that take less than a second to load take 30 seconds. Talk about first impressions. ....

So my dev life was terrible for the past couple of months. So terrible indeed I didn't find words to rant about it. But here's one that sums up what people I have to work with:

A PM came to me today and asked me how she can save SVGs as PNGs. I asked her why she needs PNGs? She said a DEVELOPER asked her for them, because he can't use SVGs.

-.- it was only 5 images btw.

Jetbrains Java runtime.
I just disabled it and enabled system Java runtime instead. I should have done this months ago, or maybe even years. The performance went from terrible to amazing in just a few seconds. Wow!

I wonder what the average lifespan is of a developer.
Is it higher or lower then the average life expectancy?
Does it have to do with our mindset? Or are our clients so terrible that we have more stress? If so does devRant lower our stress?

me giving advice to beginners: don't feel bad about your code. as long as it gets the job done, it's good

also me: don't look at my code. it's terrible!

Why do all the cool things have terrible documentation?
I'm looking at you Gnuradio and OpenCV!
Doxygen doesn't count if you don't actually write doc comments!!

Happy new year from Denmark.

Hope your year will be full of great projects with success and without terrible PM's

Our software is terrible and I'm pretty sure our department is fucked but at least I like the people I work with.

using ssh over terrible internet speeds, spends all the time trying to figure out the cursor position

!rant
I don't have a stress ball yet, but I share these two small guys with my dog. One for summer and one for Halloween & Winter. And they both squeak like crazy.

Actually, they're a terrible strain when my dog's working on them.

When I'm stuck at something and can't think of a way to solve it, I just keep running the unit tests and stare at the screen. And then youtube. And then I feel terrible.

So I've spent the past 2 months or so integrating a payments provider with a terrible API, only to find that the provider is missing a core feature that they claimed to have in their sales pitch. I have no idea what will become of a large part of my work, it's so draining to work around a total garbage API

The documentation for the matplotlib python library is terrible for newbies.

There is a "Tutorial" section, but the thing doesn't even explain what you can do until you get to the 4th section!
It starts off with some confusing examples, how to change the appearance and only at section 4 do you actually start to get an introduction to the different components you might want to use...

At some point you finally realize, most of the stuff that is shown can be omitted because the .pyplot module is all you need.

Asking for a precise or accurate estimate is asking me to predict the future, which is essentially asking me to lie to your face.

And I'm a terrible liar. Please don't make me lie.

how do you tell your "higher ups" that their practices/code are/is terrible?

When your upload speed is faster then down...
And both are terrible....

Working on a big project with lots of legacy code and terrible code. Full of jewels like this:

$('.form-item-to input').parent().removeClass('isOpen');

Man... .form-item-to IS the immediate, direct and only parent of the only input child!!!

Not really terrible start. I was just nervous and overdressed (wore a suit when everyone else was informal)

UX-wise, it should be absolutely forbidden to alter anything that is being overlapped by the cursor.

One example is the (mostly) terrible search in Windows 10. I have a tendency to use the keywords "fire" for either Firefox or Firefox Developer Edition. Sometimes, Windows will give me Developer Edition as the top result, which is fine. But as I I'm about to click the icon, Windows will find the other Firefox and place it as the top result.

This is known as terrible UX. The user interface is working against the end-user.

Hey guys! Finally decided to jump on board! This is my first rant so go easy.

Working on a project were some freedom of choice is allowed and thinking about using polymer to create a wordpress theme... Is this a good idea or a terrible one?
😕

Health anxiety is funny.

a pendulum between
"oh no, what if I have x and die"
"jesus christ, this anxiety is too painful i wish i was dead"

death is a fucking tease.

anyhow, just venting, not promoting self harm, if you are having thoughts of mortality contact your national suicide hotline.

also, not trying to be a dick, but id appreciate receiving no advice, just a "i hope you get better" will help me a lot.

Had the occasion to put my hands on Tailwind CSS. Terrible sauce. Pastas taste aweful with it. I can't see myself working one more day like this.

I hate trends.

Fuck Android Studio updates. Why you morons call it a "STABLE" update when its clearly not? -_-
You guys ruined the layout editor -_- But you guys also left no way to use the older version nowadays.

Fuck you Google!!!
FUCK!!!

New to databases - How is it that Oracle has been around for so long, yet have terrible documentation? Their support forums consists of condescending developers who never actually answer the questions and the forums’ format is just so bad.

I just spent an hour and a half installing a cpu cooler for my new server. I got so pissed my brain just switched to happy mode and I genuinely felt good and started laughing like a psychopath for no reason.

All in all, terrible experience, fuck cpu coolers. I've had terrible experience with them throughout the years.

Why are people praising macbook keyboards is beyond me, this shit terrible, feels like cracking a touchscreen on every press

He forgot the curly braces after [else]

Found from r/cringepics

what a terrible fucking day

‪And verily, he looked upon the codebase and cried out, "Who has done these terrible things?".

And there was wailing and gnashing of teeth.‬

I did some physical exercise yesterday. Now I have a terrible soreness in my legs so the only thing I can do is code.

Am I the only engineer that has a terrible time with relationships(not db relationship lol) I get so caught up in work.

How do y’all manage?

I've had a terrible experience with Visual Studio's GitHub client. Then I found GitKraken. I'm never going back!

If we were talking - and then all of the sudden, I don’t talk to you anymore... it’s probably because you ignored my advice and chose to go to an especially bad boot camp. Now - that’s fine! But the reason I’m not talking to you is because I just don’t know how to say anything positive about your terrible decision and the terrible school... so - I’m just not saying anything at all.

Terrible project with unclear requirement, lots of legacy and a client that doesn't know what he wants. Quite a bit of procrastination because of this situation, then crunch day & night to hold the deadline.

Then the project was scrapped.

Currently rewriting a python library because the author clearly doesnt understand what crossplatform means, and this language is fucking terrible.

My PM locked himself out of the house the other day. Oh how I laughed... I'm typing this whilst being locked out of my house...

Making use of the time with android programming apps - they are terrible.

Oh, Ubisoft

Relying on your UShit cloud saves was a terrible mistake

20 hours of AC Origins and 9 hours of Far Cry 5 lost because I trusted your piece of shit service would do something right

Christmas rant: I didn't code for 3 days. Terrible feeling and can't wait to get fingers on keyboard again 😢

client asks me to setup a form that emails on their site... no problem. didnt know what they actually wanted was for me to set up an email server.... im a terrible terrible sys-admin. no one should hire me for that kind of work.

"My secret is being not terrible at a lot of things." - Moby

Start teaching it terrible standards and a misrepresentation of the world so the feedback loop breaks.

I was logged into an account just now. On the "My Account" page, there was a button that said, "Manage Subscription." I clicked it. Instead of just opening the subscription page, it opened the help page in a new tab showing me how to manage my subscription. No mention anywhere about how to actually get to the subscription page. All I wanted to do was make a payment.

Eclipse and Visual Studio. Just terrible.

Work wants me to scroll to invalid fields after validation on a form. Is there actually a use case for that? Because it sounds terrible.

Dark themes are not dark.

Sigh, I have this terrible habit where I make and run my code in the same command. I'll spend an hour wondering why my bug fix didn't work and it's because the make never succeeded, but the code runs anyways. 😒😒😒

Why exactly did i decide to use kivy is beyond me, but now i started so might aswell stick to it. Expect rants vecause there are a lot of terrible design decisions here.

Also, does anyone have a kvlang documentation/examples? Couldnt find any.

FML when the code that runs every 10 minutes to check and bill a customer keeps charging him and the logs are terrible plus you have no idea what the issue was so you have to push production code to test and fix.

Worst meeting I've ever been in.

Everyone texting, then complaining about the number of meetings. If this is terrible let's make it useful and have one good meeting!

Does anyone know of a good place for coding challenges? I want to keep practicing my coding, but I'm terrible at coming up with projects.

If you backed something, and they ask you to provide a name to include in their special thanks would you:

- Use your full name for whatever the outcome will be (successful project or just a terrible failure)
- Use a nickname (Like this one on devRant)

Who the fuck is responsible for the ui/ux of the youtube app its fucking annoyingly shit. Terrible!! Fucking start again you alphabet wankers.

Adobe XD is the newest terrible child of the idea that you can design "user experience." What a waste of time. How many more middle-men do we need in this work flow?

Why is every date or time object in Java so utterly terrible?

Another terrible rant from the inhereted Hydra source code. So deep in the dark dungeon of that code I noticed something interesting. They declare this INT32 array with an incredibly long (like 200 values) list of hard coded magic numbers. Something along the lines of:

INT32 array[200] = {-1,0,1,21,4,7,19,33...};

However, the resulting output was incorrect. After spending a fort night and a good chunk of my remaining sanity I had overcone the 437 levels of indirection left by the previous programmers, and narrowed it down to this line. But it looked perfectly fine.

I pull up the diffs and notice someone had checked in a change to the source. I track it to this line and find what the original data had been.

INT32 array[200] = {-1,0,1,2l,4,7,19,33...};

In VS the default font shows l and 1 as fucking identical. Someone had accidentally made that change to 21 from the original 2l and checked it in. I mean I can't really blame them. Who the fucking hell inatantiates a fucking int32 array and peppers in a fucking 2l (long) for no fucking reason?!

Well, apples terrible keyboard is back after a short hiatus. It worked almost flawlessly for ONE update, but it's now back to its terrible illogical awful nonsense.

Parsing my college's terrible classless html float left div mosaic timetables so I could hide lectures I wasn't taking.