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Sales Guy: Hey Man, you know what? you should go back to college and advance your knowledge in Software Engineering. This way you will be an expert in programming and handling the Servers.
Me: I started programming at the age of 17 and started handling servers by the age of 18. Can I ask you something if you don't mind?
Sale Guy: Yea sure I don't mind anything
Me: Get the fuck out of here8 -
The moment you realize you're just good at googling and not an expert in programming...
That's when the internet connectivity is down!5 -
When I was looking for an internship...
- Hello, I noticed your cv and you have a great portfolio! Are you familiar with responsive design?
- I have a basic knowledge on that, i am not an expert.
- Ok, can you come for an interview on Monday?
-Sure
Monday morning....
Interview with CEO...
- What's your experience with responsive design?
- I have a basic knowledge on that, i am not an expert.
- Sorry I need someone expert
- But the job is for junior dev and it's an internship
- Yes but man hours of someone to training you will be a cost for me.
- Ok, thank you
(Step before closing the door)Btw you should had check my portfolio, 4/8 websites are responsive.4 -
LinkedIn is an alternative reality unhooked from the rest of the world, where hypocrisy and arrogance meet, creating Leaders, Experts and Analysts.
- Every company is an industry leader globally.
- Every offer is life-changing.
- Every normal person suddenly is an expert in his field
- Each candidate is an expert in time management, customer relationships, and software development priorities.
- They are all happy to share their achievements in a disinterested way
- They all deal with important issues, with great reflections on the meaning of life and reality around us
- Each written post usually starts with a question followed by a life experience
- Companies are dynamic, they change their internal processes on a daily basis
Please shoot me, I've had enough of this shit.
- Few companies are leaders globally
- The offers you make are traps and I always have to look for where the bullshit is.
- You're not an expert in your field if you've been doing the same thing for 10 years without moving your ass out of that chair.
- If you were a time management expert, I wouldn't have to call you every week for unresolved tasks, and I wouldn't even have to do 150 meetings to postpone the goals set. Exactly what is your experience with the customer? Because by heart shutting up and always saying yes is not a good way to get the job done.
- I have great news for you. Nobody gives a shit about your work successes. At most they're envious.
- If you really are such a deep and introspective person... how the fuck is it that working with you is hell?
- Copying a quote from a website and then building a narrative on it doesn't automatically make you a superstar
- Companies, especially the largest ones, take years to change and if they do it is because there is the economic motivation behind it, not because they are visionaries.
This rant was written by scrolling through my LinkedIn feed.15 -
Sorry John Doe, you're application for this job has been rejected. As we specified for this job you need to know about GitHub. In your CV you stated that you are an expert in git but our job requires the knowledge of hub as well. Good luck next time10
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In programming what is the difference between an expert programmer and a noob??
- they both Google when they're stuck but expert knows what he's searching for and noob learns about what he's searching for!!9 -
that time when a client wants you to teach a bird how to fly.
but the bird is a penguin
and you are a bear expert
"but it has wings!"7 -
I forgot what it felt like to not be the domain expert in a thing. 😅 Have to learn a ton of new things for work, which is great, but I feel guilty for being so slow. SO SLOW.
I know it’s normal, I’m just…. Getting used to it. 😉
Anyway, here’s a cat.
9 -
So apparently someone discovered an exploit in iOS devices which would make shitloads of devices jailbreakable and it can't be updated due to the chip being read-only.
I'm not an expert on this by far but hereby a source:
https://idownloadblog.com/2019/09/...
Again, I'm not an expert on this but it does seem awesome that a lot of devices (if I read it correctly) are jailbreakable now (when someone developed one with this exploit)!37 -
In a mobile project far far away...
Dev: Now we need a ui expert to beautify the app.
Boss: we dont need him its beautiful as it is.
5 mins later....
Boss: here Is a ton of ui changes dear dev. I trust that you have creative insight to make changes that I like :)4 -
On my first dev job ever, I got sent to the client's office after studying CSS on my own for 2 weeks.
Client: "So, you're the great expert your manager told me about?"1 -
Fun is, when you get to fix the front-end made by a "front-end expert" consisting of bootstrap and a single "custom.css" of 3800 lines.
Peak sadism. 🤡15 -
Rubber duck didn't understand code. So decided to use the expert for Android.
Meet Little Buggy.
P. S. I have 2 more, makes a complete family! 😀
4 -
So...
I'm looking for my first job as a web developer. I kept seeing these rants about how horrible and frustrating job searching is, all of which I thought were greatly exaggerated. They're all just jokes and memes, right?
Nope.
Every fucking meme seems to be true.
- Junior developer with +4 years of experience, expert in their field - check!
- Listing requirements for 6 different jobs under "Full-stack developer" - check!
- "Expert developer required ASAP" - $10/hour - check!
- 100% remote ... *scrolls all the way down* ... for 2 days of the week - check!
- Entry level font-end position - must be an expert in Vue, Angular, React, AWS, Drupal, Wordpress, PHP, Python, ES9+, OOP, TDD, BDD - check!
- "Cool" description written in js code with no indentation - check!
And I'm not seeing these every once in a while or something like that. No. Most of the posts are like this. I thought I may just be underqualified since I've never had a real job before, but this just seems crazy to me...4 -
Me: So, tell me more about what you want me to code.
Friend: Well... Do something nice.
Me: Like?
Friend: I don't know, I thought you're the expert...
Me: You motherf...1 -
Don't lie in your resume or in the interview.
People know you're not an expert at everything, nobody expects that from anybody (and you should really avoid working for anybody who does)2 -
So yesterday I posted a photo on linkedin jokingly that I was the in the top 10 of typescript developers in the country. I know that codersrank doesn’t assess your skill but rather the frequency but my linkedin has blown up 😂😂 think I’ve become a social media expert by accident 🤷🏼♀️
5 -
I did an interview with an international company for an "Expert Fullstack Dev." position...
After being praised by the technical team, it turned out that the position was offering a junior salary...
I swear to god...
HR is the cancer of this industry
I lose faith in humanity day by day.6 -
Simple and accurate!
UI/UX makes a huge difference to average users. Just because you're the developer/expert user, do not think what's obvious to you is obvious to everyone. Think about being in a bubble. This is why you need collaboration with people in a different scope. Or atleast gather feedback from users.
4 -
at a previous job at a shit company ran by bible-thumpers, i was rebuilding the company website for my a-hole boss. I asked him where I should get images from- if there was a stock photo site he preferred or what.
"Just pull them off Google. That's what I do."
Later when I was combing through the site, I saw he'd added images that CLEARLY STATE another COMPANY'S NAME in the image themselves. Nothing like promoting another company on your OWN company website, huh?
(And no, their company name is not ActiveMobi.)
They're still there, 3+ years later. Dumb ass.
2 -
I'm taking an entrepreneurship course and there is this one guy who talks empty words just to impress others.
He uses linux and at every single course he opens the terminal just to run the commands "sudo apt update" and "sudo apt remove", the rest of the time he is on discord.
He always switches to the terminal so you can see what an 'expert' he is17 -
They made more of those "The Expert" client parody skits (the seven red lines ones)! https://youtube.com/playlist/...
3 -
This is how Pokémon Go shows errors to its users. It says a generic „Error“ in German with different numbers for different errors.
I am not an UX expert, but isn’t this a really bad practice? The error number has no meaning to the user, so why displaying it? I think it is just confusing and looks ugly 😐
8 -
When you are finish doing the UI of the app then your UI/UX expert suddenly want to change everything, because he/she saw much cooler ui in the pinterest. The Horror!2
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Expert: "The core problem with passwords is that they reside on a server."
I suppose that's true, but only if you're a complete moron. Store a hash of a password, and users can authenticate against it with a password that doesn't get logged. This is technology that's been around for over fifty years. If you're storing passwords on a server, you deserve whatever trouble you get.6 -
An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
Niels Bohr40 -
So i have been working with a so called python expert my manager on a project.
He has 3 years of more experience in python than me.
The best thing is he shows up everyday with random post from stackoverflow to fix our bugs everyday.
And if the code is in python2 he says that only difference is just put () around print and it will work
🤦♂️
He earns thrice as much i do3 -
I'm the git expert at my work. This means every time someone has the slightest issue with git (or the git features in their ide), I get interrupted.
😡😡😡
Also I will say it is fascinating watching people who've used centralised version control all their lives struggle with distributed.
"Do you have my changes? I merged them into your branch..."
"You can commit and not push?!"9 -
A T.A. in my university.
He's kind of a java expert and the class was about advanced oop principles.
But the way he coded live in class and spoke clearly how he approaches the problems was the best thing that I got from the class.
Needless to say, nearly everyone that enrolls in that class, starts to love java afterwards xD1 -
Linkedin hunter per excellence. They are looking for “an experienced Expert for a position as Junior IT Consultant“.
Well, I have some experience, but someone should really explain them the concept of being a Junior Expert...5 -
Teacher asks the class:
"How do you become a good developer?"
All the students starts talking about algorithms, problem solving or working in a team.
He nods and starts writing on the board. w w w. g o o g l e . c o m
He then leaves the classroom.
So here I am years later, a master googler and a expert stack overflower.4 -
It's a job description for an entry level Software Developer role at Apple.
Basically they want
- A Front end dev
- A back end dev
- An iOS expert
- A Gimp/photoshop designer
- A streaming data expert
- An Oracle/Teradata expert
- A Kafka expert ( Not shown in the picture)
And on top of that the guy should be able to learn new tech faster.
Do they want a developer or a fucking terminator?
5 -
When the so called "css expert" ask you why you're implementing so many things in @media all and (max-width: 800px) because it "doesn't change anything"
I had to teach him about responsive web design and chrome developer tools mobile emulation...3 -
Love when the client knows more than you and tells you to create a report on an imaginary tool they are 100% sure it exists because their friend is an SEO expert and thinks all pages should be running at a 100 percent on lighthouse. Fml.2
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Had a meeting with about 5 people, 4 of which showed up, 1 of which did not.
Guess which one was the subject matter expert without whom we spent 55 minutes positing what-if's that could've been easily answered if that individual was there?
Yup. Never rescheduled, and that was the end of that conversation. -
Applicant: I have 7 years of experience in software development industry and here is my repo/portfolio for you to look at.
Manager: I don't need it. Take the 5 hours coding exam.
*Applicant scores low
Manager: You didn't score high. Thank for applying at Stack****. Goodbye
Applicant: Wait, sorry but do you judge all applicants only through an exam?
Manager: Yes. Exam tells how expert the applicant is.10 -
"What? You aren't sure where the Android Wifi credentials QR Code scanner is specifically located? But.. Aren't you the expert?" Trying not to freaking boil my blood right now.5
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!rant
Thanks google for giving me the opportunity to work with neural networks without being an expert about them.
http://automl.github.io/auto-sklear...
To sum it up:
1. Preprocess data
2. Use Automl to train classifier
3. ????
4. Profit1 -
I like coding. I am a professional coder. But I feel I am not very good at it. My colleagues are so creative and fast with their solutions. And here I am, always in awe and never seem to feel like becoming an expert in coding. The thoughts are tiring 😪6
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Ever had that meeting where it's expected that you will solve cold fusion, catch rainbows and violate the laws of thermodynamics? Just because you are an expert in your field?
Also beautifully demonstrated here:
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg3 -
Is it me or freelancing jobs at Freelancer are incredibly vague.
Jobs titled "build me a website" with descriptions like "I need an expert dev to work on a python website".
How the hell can you put a price and time to it?!
Am I missing something here? I'm totally new at this and it's kinda baffling.4 -
Well... Well... What a multi-talented personality...
Every connection I see on LinkedIn has these buzz words in their tag line: AI/ML, Cryptocurrency, Blockchain.
This guy even has Smart City...!!!
Don't know how many of them are legit... I just don't understand each of these techs are so vast... Still people manage to get expert in all of them in just few days... What's the secret...?
8 -
So we've got a gif that doesn't show up in our React Native application. Of course, the designers assume it's me: "are you sure the gif is in the codebase? how are you using it in your component"? yeah ok boomer. I'm like, look at this other gif, works fine. "oh" So I tell them, double check the export options on how you are building the gif, maybe there is something there. so now they are asking ME for those export options. I'M A DEV, NOT A DESIGNER, DO YOUR JOB AND FIGURE IT OUT. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT PROGRAM YOU ARE USING
oh as an aside, I was putting up a website for a client and they are like "my logo is quite similar to many others, is this something to worry about legally?" OH, SO NOW I'M A LAWYER TOO??!!?!? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE GOOGLE IS LITERALLY IN FRONT OF YOU
why do people continually think just because we can code we are fucking designers / lawyers / astronauts
/ god?
man this pisses me off - i think of that draw red lines with blue ink expert video, in the end, just smile and nod: "i can do... absolutely anything... trust me, I'm an expert"4 -
Manager: Oh I also forgot, we also have a red balloon... do you know if you could inflate it?
Dev (the EXPERT): ...4 -
Being a junior and part of a small team at a startup, working with a new software architecture, even the team lead is a beginner in it. It feels like I'm at an echo chamber, there's nobody expert enough to look up to if stuck, decisions seem to be based on opinions rather than an architectural design kinda point of view.
Ugh, I hope I'm not the only here ever feeling this way.7 -
I have developed 3 apps so far in laravel and I can say I'm in a mid level between beginner and expert.
But every time I set up a new laravel environment I feel like this is the first time I see laravel.5 -
I'm no Nodejs expert but can someone explain how in the fucking world is node_modules folder is that HUGE! on my slow ass internet it takes couple of mins to pull the repo and five mins to finish npm install! and takes so much ram to build a freaking docker container for my react website when it takes barely 300MB to build both MySQL and Asp.Net Core dockers T_T7
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That moment when you're hired as expert of technology A, and the first thing that is asked of you, is to do a PoC of tech A integrated with tech B... and then they assume that you are expert at tech B... and to be as fast as working on thech A2
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I tried to go for a job as a ReactJS junior dev.. I got my first interview and they liked my prototype.. but..
A week later they reply: "We decided not to go with you because we hired an expert in ReactJS".
Err.. really? You're hiring expert-level ReactJS developers for a junior position?! What the frig.
You want to know what I think? This whole "It's ok that you don't know everything, you'll learn on the job" thing is a hoax. No, the job market doesn't want novices. With every single interview, I'm met with: "but you're not an expert and we can't afford that".
This reminds me of the best advice my professor (seasoned expert in the field, real engineer with more than 20 years experience) once gave me:
"The job market doesn't have the time nor patience to mollycoddle you. When you enter it, you have to already know things to an expert degree because companies want value. They're hiring you because you have these skills and knowledge.
You have to already know what they ask before they ask it. You're required to know things by yesterday, so to speak. It is an exigent industry out there. This is why we bring you the foundations - so that you go further on your own and you can take on any problem"9 -
It's a sad fact of life that managing dynamic memory is a very difficult programming task. Some public domain X-Window applications are notorious for leaking like the Apple Computer board of directors -- Expert C Programming4
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My company started to do very unethical things (or maybe even break the law – I'm no expert) in order to cover up some business people fuckups. I'm seriously considering quitting immediately even though I hoped to stay here for some time as I like the people I work with. It's those unimaginative bastards at the top that make it unbearable.3
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That moment when: you lift your gaze from your phone to understand the sudden quiet is because your expert opinion is needed in the meeting.
-
Wtf is this? I searched for my problem and have to pay money to see the answer an 'expert' gave to another user who needed help? And I don't even know if it would solve my problem. That's definitely a great marketing strategy.
https://imgur.com/a/usPDYxG
6 -
It's 3 years old but for any of you who hasn't seen "The Expert"..
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg
Still the closest thing resembling my corporate life 🤣3 -
I think the biggest poison in AI products is trying to replace the expert instead of making them more productive. And I feel like the reason is "managers don't want to make employee's lives better".
Code tools could be quite good for boilerplate, documentation and tests, but it's trying to be a full programmer. They could highlight areas of concern in medical images instead of trying to fully classify them.5 -
You want me to be an expert in advanced data structures, algorithms, dbms, Oracle, python, machine learning, J2EE just to develop apps for you? If I had been a master of all trades, I would not have come to you in the first place.2
-
Typical interview response from employers nowadays on a candidate's tech skills:
"We don't have the budget to teach someone how to work with the technology. We expect from you that you are already an expert and you need no guidance. We have neither time nor money for slowdowns. We are under pressure to deliver"
Back in the days "I'm willing to learn" used to be of value, but things have changed.9 -
So the new guy convinces my employer that he is a Machine Learning Expert. Nothing is wrong until He even convinces my employer that he can do Machine Learning with HTML (<==== is not a Programming Language); This is the time my IQ instantly dropped to ```Patrick Star```.8
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I just got called an expert for using Linux 😂 I'm taking this computer research in Psychology module (Matlab), and I was the only one using Linux.
-
You constantly see these professional profiles with labels such as 'Expert'/10 years experience/senior/CTO/CIO/Consultant.
Isn't it funny when you go and work with these people in the field, they appear to be frauds? How can these people legitimately have these titles and know less than a snotty freshman year student? Their knowledge is so poor, a 14-year old with basic Windows and Javascript knowledge could outmatch them. If only this weren't true.
I think it's very unfair because they attract employers and they even get hired, while some of us with veteran knowledge in several fields don't get considered for a job.
May I add that it's always the funny guys who get a job. Apparently being a relatable frat bro at an interview is more important than having priceless expert knowledge. -
Sh*t. I think I'm going to lose my job bc the CEO thought I was an expert on React even thought I specifically told him I wasn't. I worked at least 12 hours everyday, sometimes including weekends for 4 weeks now. And still got yelled at for not being an expert.
If you tell your manager: "I only used this tech in my spare time", would they expect you to be working at expert level?
I'm very confused and seems like noone is understanding my side.
Feel like sh*t rn because I really need this job because I'm broke but I dont know how to say to the CEO that I warned him and the team lead that I was not an expert. And yet, they treat me like one....10 -
I am not a US citizen or an expert in law, so my questions are:
- Do you think this RESTRICT act that will potentially ban VPN use will be passed?
- Is the restriction only applied to those who use Tiktok or general use?
- Corporates also use some kind of internal VPN, is this included in the ban?
- How much dumber the gov is trying to be?
https://beincrypto.com/vpn-users-ri...7 -
Studying engineering doesn't make you an expert physicist, and studying medicine doesn't make you an expert virologist. Learn the bloody difference, just because somebody has a degree doesn't mean all they say is true and verified, especially if the don't list their sources or talk about it "exclusively" for one media.3
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Is part of being intermediate/fluent in a tool, language or framework that you've just unwillingly memorized all the error messages you've come across?
'Hey I got error X' -> Just change Z and C and it will work
'Do you know what this stacktrace is trying to tell me?' -> Yeah you forgot a space
'What does this mean?' -> Just add the host to the hostfile
Not that it immediately makes you an expert ofcourse2 -
So I'm no labor law expert or anything, but this just seems off. Anyone know the legality of this?
8 -
As someone who often interviews devs, I can say you should be honest about your abilities. Just because you tweaked someone's Python code doesn't mean you are a Python expert. Stick to the facts on your resume/cv. Also, have a good code portfolio. That shows the interviewer much more than a degree does.4
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Starting a new job on Thursday after 2 years as software engineer at a different company. I feel like a know no transferable (language) skills; I was mostly "the expert" of the framework at the previous company and now feel like I'm starting from scratch.
How do you handle starting a new position? Do you prepare yourself or just go and see? Am I overthinking?4 -
That moment, in a meeting when you are trying to show a technical flaw in a manager idea... And suddenly you have a déjà vu moment from the "The Expert" comic sketch...
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Sitting 3h in a bullshit claiming and blaming meeting called 'refinement' as 'the tech expert' while PO and customers fight how stories and bugs should be priorized and importantly enough they discussed why the god damn bugfix isn't alive yet that was promised to be deployed this morning.. I was up to deploy it right the time they said I really have to go to that meeting... Yeah.. Business as usual
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What's the actual requirements to be called full stack developer? I do front-end, back-end, database, server, my own api's etc. I even have a t-shirt with "Keep calm and hug a printer". I've been doing this for 15 years and would not call me an expert in any part and certainly not privilegied for the full stack title. So what is?
If this was a humblebrag then please shoot me..7 -
The more I show up to the office to tackle impossible client demands, the more I realize that I am living in the world of The Expert.
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg1 -
I shared this video a while back with some coworkers including my PM and another department that was making ridiculous requests. Didn't change a thing.
https://youtu.be/BKorP55Aqvg
They went as far as to ask me if they ever did anything like that. I, in all seriousness said yes. They laughed.3 -
When I say I'm in "DevOps" what I really mean is that I'm a full-stack engineer, DBA, system administrator, security engineer, auditor, cloud custodian, cost optimization expert, and everything else that doesn't get its own dedicated staff member here. Pretty much the catch all between developers and customer.
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How many of you folks here consider yourself specialist in a certain area? Was this deliberate, and has it paid off? My lead dev is always trying to bestow upon me the advantages of being a generalist in this industry, and yet the employers I have spoken to, on the whole, seem to get most excited by “experts”. If it fits the expert they, want, of course...5
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Can somebody please explain to me why I need to be an expert at witchcraft & dark magic just to merge 2 SVN branches. And why the fuck anybody still uses SVN when there's git.5
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We were building a website using angular 1. We were collaborating with some devs from outside our firm. At some point one of the devs(which was supposed to be a front end expert) had the brilliant idea to migrate to a never version of angular. He made the changes and fucked up all the controllers and functionalities and then he just disappeared. My team worked for 2 weeks to fix his mess.
Dude do you even know the definition of refactoring? 😤4 -
i am not a SQL expert, but i can do what i need to do in order to be considered a full stack dev
the syntax i have to learn was deprecated before i was even born -
This movie is so recognizable: "The Expert". Really, a must see for every IT related consultant out there. Not once, I have felt exactly like this guy: https://m.youtube.com/watch/...7
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Pluralsight said I'm in the 85th percentile of people who know JavaScript and therefore I'm an ”Expert"
So now I walk around like, "bro do you even know how to pass a callback?" 😏 -
Reading all these hacking stories has made me nervous that my server isn't protected enough.
I've disabled password login and setup SSH keys which as far as I know is a big step in the right direction.
Is it enough? What more should I do?
In case you can't tell, I'm no expert in server adminy stuff 😛9 -
"Oh, you only know 10% of how these algorithms work? You're now the subject matter expert, so you get to write the code"
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Dev bootcamps? I went to one! Probably the best decision I ever made.
They aren't perfect, they're pricey, and they won't make you an expert, but it's a good way to expedite a new career, gives a good base knowledge to start out. -
Recruiter: We are looking for a full-stack expert. You have taken multiple apps from conception to deployment, and have experience and opinions on the best technologies to use and why. You should be comfortable implementing new features from scratch, making changes to existing features and writing complex migrations on production data.
Dev: lol4 -
There is a Facebook group I’m a part of called “ReactJS Expert Community” and I can tell you it’s filled with anything but experts. Someone just posted on it asking what the difference between Axios and async/ await is. The only reason I’m part of this group is so I can feel good about myself when I screw up while coding xP
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Tomorrow I'll write an exam in programming. I code since I was 11 years old and as soon as I got to that stupid programming class in school I felt bored. My teacher is an former encryption expert and thinks I'm too good for that stupid school. Well at least I am ready for the exam... That shit is so boring in class 😂2
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I just love how everyone on this miserable spinning rock in space has transitioned in the past 3 years from being a virologist and plagues expert to a commerce and finances expert to a
fine art expert to a geopolitics and war expert to an engineering and artificial intelligence expert.
seriously someone messed up something on production in this world, i think we need a reset.2 -
I fixed one problem we had at work with SSL over a year ago. Since then, whenever anyone has any problem vaguely to do with SSL, they come to me. The "expert". So I guess I'd like to become what I'm already perceived as... SSLman1
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I think it was very useful for developing soft skills like time management, teamwork, dealing with failures, the willingness to learn and how to approach a problem, etc.
It's not about learning a technology or programming language super good and be the C++ or Web expert after finishing your degree. It's about self organization and problem solving IMO. -
[Talk by a security expert. The main point was, complexity kills security.]
7 minutes later a friend via IM: Hey, let's use OpenStack! Just 33 micro services to install! -
- Get to expert level on all my preferred technologies
- Get to travel after graduation
- Strive for a better position at current company
- Contribute to interesting open-source projects
- Hope to not go insane in the process -
I don't like how I develop our apps right now. My team leader said that the UI of the App, we are developing, only our UI/UX expert makes decision on how our app will look like. No developer must interfere. It's like shut up and do this. It's practically insane!6
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Some companies: asking for a developer, must have 5 years of experience. Must know C#, php and Python. Also expert in html css react angular and vue. Salary: scrubs. Haha good look looking for the ultimate developer senior for €1800 a month :’)1
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The product owner, cum our solutions architect is dumb.
It takes him ages to explain one shit.
Also, he is an expert on triggering useless chaos and panic, thanks to his innate abilities to misinterpret shit.
He thinks everything should happen at 3×10^8 m/s.3 -
MFW I, a junior dev who just started have to explain what sql injection is to a senior IT person... It's not like I'm an expert in the field, but a little bit of expertise would be nice2
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When this video (The Expert sketch) became my reality....so many times 😥
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
Thank god for Git. I fucked up my webpage beyond repair and I am not an expert in html div alignments. I pulled in a commit I did an hour ago and at least got the page back to normal. I don't even want to imagine what devs did before the days of source control. D:
Tomorrow will be spent learning how to better follow closing </div> tags. :(4 -
I really recommend to follow the online course of Jonas Schmedtmann on Udemy talking about JS from 0 to expert.
Have you ever heard about it?
I just starting the course some week ago, but i fell very involved by him, i think one of the best teacher on the platform,
Anyway I'm really proposed to hear some feedback or another different personal experience3 -
Try out all sorts of things/technologies and find what interests you the most. Go after being an expert in that particular domain. Also, learn by doing.
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i am becoming our companies excel advanced expert. actually i am just better at internet searching than the rest of us. creating fully automated sheets makes me wonder what all of the office stuff learned during their appreticeship and how they can avoid using office properly while entering everything manually.
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When a client’s website is about how he’s an expert at fixing his customers’ psychological problems, and he’s got those same problems and isn’t managing them well at all himself, you just
1. Build site.
2. Get check.
3. Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to even if you really are curious.1 -
To keep the search results of a self build webshop after browsing and returning after searching, my client had "the solution" to make the product page picture-in-picture. He's a self acclaimed tech and seo expert.
In the end I solved it with pushstates1 -
I seem to be seen as our team expert on build systems, and I'm literally on a call trying to help someone fix a problem they're having with the windows build system. My only real contribution to the conversation has been "does it build on Linux?", to which the answer was "no", and everything after that has just been other people discussing the more informative error messages coming from the Linux build system.1
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I was asked to pretend to be an expert to solve a temporary solution for a client in my company. I agreed because I thought it would be a simple solution.
I was wrong.
They only gave me 4 days to train (Including my f*cking weekend) and the project requires a much more experienced consultant since I'm struggling even with the simplest of tasks. Also, the person who was suppose to help me it's not always available. And they are not actively searching for a new expert.
Today I'll talk to my team lead and the person in charge of the project and let them know that this task will require someone much more experienced.
I may get fired but at least my conscience will be clear.
I just feel bad for the client. They are such nice people.7 -
I just wrote my exam in IT class. I'm really happy with the fact that we use a computer for a few tasks. That's how the average IT expert works. Think-code-debug. It's practically impossible to write a Java program on paper without mistakes.
Other than that I named my variables like
boolean iCanWriteNowWoohoooo = false;
etc.
It didn't work 100% in the end but I hope to still get a decent grade.1 -
1. When you ask the rationale behind simpler programming concepts. Some are writing they are Java expert(5 star in some interface) and when you ask questions deeper than what is polymorphism.
2. When you ask them to show their work on one of online repositories. I aint taking your word on your msterious projects.5 -
Yesterday they was a designer or a developer, today they’re an “accessibility expert”.
Those kind of people are the worst, discrediting accessibility by thinking of it as a “I’m always superior because I do the right thing” card while they never really do anything but defending their own arbitrary emotional assumptions by calling it “fighting for human rights”.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/...1 -
Have I said this before? The Google - everything and the Facebook - everything... is SO FUCKED. Seriously... why would anyone ever want to work somewhere with weekend-bootcamp- hackathon quality user interface? You have to be an "expert" in their exact interface of the month just to give them money.1
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hello guys
I recently learnt the django and im not an expert . I pushed a repository on my github
"pouria03".
and i just started to learn DRF(django rest framework) .
do you have any advice for me to help my progress?
I'll be thankful4 -
These fucking deepshet, spoiled retards
they expert me to build software not from the ground but from the fucking foundation up to release date all by myself
they also expert me to do all required research
also expert me to do the fucking marketing
they expert me to bring new fucking business
They expert me to work at High performance
They expert me to do stock inventory as well
They fucking sit me in shity meetings
WHAT THA FUCK IS THIS SHIT -
At what point are you an expert in C++?
Herb Sutter's talk tilted "Back to Basics" (available on YouTube) contains the message "it's easy to forget that you're an expert" in the context of writing code that utilizes the latest complicated features of a language to squeeze out the last drop of performance.
So what makes someone an expert? Is it just writing production code? Is it groking the entire panel presented by a standards committee member? Is it contributing to the STL? Is it when you can write your own compiler while blindfolded and juggling rubber duckies in under 60 seconds?
What makes a person an expert in any language, for that matter?5 -
Why the carrot did people keep asking me about their hacked account? I'm only a programmer, not a social media expert.3
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My dream dev-power would be to have a prescient warning with a couple years advance on what's the next interesting AND money-raking technology, so I will be already an expert just at start and I could even get a job at the sponsor company.
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say you're thinking about starting a new project, you have the basics but not really expert in all the aspects required by the project and decided to open source it. how would you get the project more visibility which means more people involved ?4
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So about a big problem I had earlier in the two last weeks, we were waiting for the expert of the team we work with if they have any idea. But we had to wait for him to get back from their one-week break.
We asked them about it
They have no clue
fuck. -
Every time when someone tells me they are an expert of ML. I chuckled. I don't know the ML stands for Machine Learning or "MY LEGGGGG' from SpongeBob.
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I notice something in the news network.
They can be either bias or don't take a stance.
For some topic their reporting is very bias. Only giving a single point of view and just use facts to confirm it. I call it being bias.
For topic which they can be criticize for taking either side they use the so called "expert discussion"
They gather various expert and discuss about the topics.
Start = Undecided
End = Still undecided with a lot of confusions.
Some people will call it Democratic news channel , Republican news channel. They are wrong. There is only 1 news channel since they are all the same.
I am losing trust on the news channel (which I should not be feeling)
Do you guy feel the same?4 -
CSS is like a deterministic FPGA language; you describe a loop-free dataflow diagram and then switch to a different one to cycle data around.
https://dev.to/janeori/...
This gives me an idea -
That moment when you explain to your manager what the term "full-stack" means and next thing you know you've gone from being a "backend c#" to azure migration expert/dba/designer/api architect/network engineer/php wordpress developer... let's go back to when you'd never heard of full-stack
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My last days at work before changing job. I am an angular expert, and I have contributed to build the first angular enterprise project for my business; during my last 20 days you know what I am doing? Maintenance on a pretty old GWT project that nobody wants to care...1
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Old but gold. The Expert sketch A.K.A. how it feels to be a developer during a project meeting. https://youtube.com/watch/...
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The worst part about being an accessibility expert in these times is getting a redundant flood of a11y stuff on developer knowledge email subscriptions.
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Any Vue expert here?
I just want to publish a vue.js component on npm.
I know how to publish it, but I was wondering I have to structure the vue component package.
I read (almost)everything about it, but I couldn't find anything clear.3 -
Security expert advices over security is like a priest preaching about the way of life. Both of them tend to same thing that it would protect from `evil`
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When I get a code review by my self-proclaimed expert colleague suggesting a change that ends up breaking the feature, I just implement that spaghetti code and let the testers know I'm not to blame.
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Any Fiverr expert could help me please, I have added new gigs to my account and the impressions and clicks are increasing everyday but I've got no orders for 2 weeks. It's quite strange to me.2
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I need urgent answer as quora is being weird like always. Ok here we go. I have a project idea but its really huge in size. Lots of features.
My question is. I recently learned Angular 2 but I know jquery well. Which one should I choose for the frontend? Please give your opinions. I need your expert advice.6
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