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WINDOWS USER VS LINUX USER
A Windows User's view on computing
I have the blue screen of death again
You'll never hear me say
I'm happy with my computer
At the end of the day
my operating system
dictates
my choice
in programs i use and the features I've
i have complete control
over nothing
i lose sleep
worrying about getting viruses
and
microsoft patching vulnerabilities in time
i don't have time to think about
some thing better.
i've learned
to live with old software issues
There's no way i'm planning
to change, and
its worth it to me
A Linux User's view on computing
(read this bottom to top)15 -
Duplex: Hi, Umm... Can I book 3 seats on Wednesday?
Restaurant: Sure! And what time is it?
Duplex: Yeah, Oh, I'd like it at NullPointer Exception if it's possible.
Restaurant: Invalid parameter "NullPointer Exception" restarting program...4 -
Programmer was smoking...
lady nearby: "can't you see the warning smoking is injurious to your life!"
Programmer: "we are not worried about warnings only about Errors"4 -
My colleague always tells me how he hates windows and that he uses linux just to look like cool dev, one day I found him using windows and he was like ....
7 -
What do computers and air conditioners have in common ---- They both become useless when you open windows
3 -
user: bro I have 32 bit windows 7. The game needs 64 bit to play. How can i get it ?
user: will it work if I install my windows twice?
IT guy: Yes install it twice you will also get windows 14.
user: thanks a lot man. You are a legend3 -
This facts are killing me
"During his own Google interview, Jeff Dean was asked the implications if P=NP were true. He said, "P = 0 or N = 1." Then, before the interviewer had even finished laughing, Jeff examined Google’s public certificate and wrote the private key on the whiteboard."
"Compilers don't warn Jeff Dean. Jeff Dean warns compilers."
"gcc -O4 emails your code to Jeff Dean for a rewrite."
"When Jeff Dean sends an ethernet frame there are no collisions because the competing frames retreat back up into the buffer memory on their source nic."
"When Jeff Dean has an ergonomic evaluation, it is for the protection of his keyboard."
"When Jeff Dean designs software, he first codes the binary and then writes the source as documentation."
"When Jeff has trouble sleeping, he Mapreduces sheep."
"When Jeff Dean listens to mp3s, he just cats them to /dev/dsp and does the decoding in his head."
"Google search went down for a few hours in 2002, and Jeff Dean started handling queries by hand. Search Quality doubled."
"One day Jeff Dean grabbed his Etch-a-Sketch instead of his laptop on his way out the door. On his way back home to get his real laptop, he programmed the Etch-a-Sketch to play Tetris."
"Jeff Dean once shifted a bit so hard, it ended up on another computer. "6 -
S: Do you want to hear a UDP joke?
C: Yes I would like to hear a UDP joke.
S: ...
S: ...
C: ...?...?...?
S: Well I don't care if you get it!
User: "Hello, I'd like to hear a torrent joke".
Tracker: "I will refer you to people who can tell you a torrent joke"
Peer1: "Why d"
Peer2: "cken "
Peer3: "road?"
Peer4: "id th"
Peer3: "cross"
Peer1: "e chi"
Peer5: " the"
Peer2: "the o"
Peer4: "To ge"
Peer1: "side."
Peer5: "ther"
Peer2: "t to"4 -
student in an exam
Q: what don't you eat for lunch?
stud Ans: dinner and breakfast.
Q: how do you lift an elephant with one hand?
stud ans: there is no elephant with one hand.1 -
Iphone 8: no headphones
Iphone x: no home button
Iphone 11: no speakers
Iphone 13: no camera
Iphone 15: no screen
Iphone 16: no phone
8 -
They say, MATHS is a universal language,
They say, WAR is a universal language,
They say, LOVE is a universal language,
They say, SEX is a universal language,
.
.
I say C is the universal Language!!!9 -
Dear recruiters,
if you are looking for
- Java,Python, PHP
- React,Angular
- PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB
- AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS
- *nix system administration
- Git and CI with TDD
- Docker, Kubernetes
That's not a Full Stack Developer
That’s an entire IT department
Yours truly #stolen10 -
devRant is just like developers democracy
devRant is an APP "of the DEVELOPERS" , by the DEVELOPERS, and for the DEVELOPERS6 -
Teacher: Write a program to print fibonacci series up to 8 terms
Me: *hardcodes 0,1,1,2,3,5,8,13*
Teacher: *runs the programs*
Me: *relieved*
Teacher: *checks the code*
Me:
5 -
This days whenever I have a groundbreaking idea, my firs step is...
Google that exact title, because every possible app ideas are already done ✅1 -
so, yesterday I configured a server for a production,
today I rushed into the room only to find a server with KDE plasma installed, Pycharm editor and a browser open.
WTF, how long until all developers realize that a terminal is a UI.1 -
Teacher: what is 1 + 1?
kid : I don't know
Teacher: Ok! you have one man and one women, how many are there?
Kid: Three.
Teacher: how?
Kid: There was my mom and dad, when they add up we become three.
Teacher: %(;:)--,^$2 -
After article 13,
Stackoverflow be like:
[this answer can’t be displayed because of copyright infringement]
4 -
What’s the difference between USB and USA?
The first one is used to transfer files from one device to another, while the other is used to transfer all your device’s data2 -
today a developer delivered his code.
and I found
- all "i" variables missing
- all "(" closings missing
- all "k" characters missing
latter I found out that it was because his middle finger was hurting :XD5 -
Phew,
now I have a MacBook Pro, an iPad Pro and an iPhone. I achieved my dream.
Apple: MAC PRO WITH DISPLAY AND STAND.15 -
Every programmer had these times when he thinks of an idea to develop and tries to hide it from anyone finding out, but later he gets bored and brags his thought.
:) :)3 -
Earth to Moon - 238,900 mi
Moon to Earth - 238,900 mi
New york to London - 3,459 mi
London to New york - 3,459 mi
Monday to Friday - 5
Friday to Monday - WTF!!!2 -
I just called my girlfriend to check up on her.
She said she's in church,
I said "put JESUS on the phone"
...
I don't trust that Bitch :)3 -
I started programming when I was 18. Now I am 22 and I am programming Machine learning and and AI.
You don’t have to start when your 10 to be the best at it...6 -
colleague : Hey I resolved yesterday's error.
me : really? how?
colleague : found it on stackoverflow.
me : Oh. From the question or the answer?
burrrrn!!! -
I love deadlines,
Actually I wait until the very last moment. Because I believe the older I get the smarter I will become
:-)6 -
Tupac - Lyric king
Eazy - Gangsta rap
Biggie - Flow king
Eminem - Rhyme king
Dr Dre - beat king
Rick Ross - burger king
Me - COPY/PASTE KING4 -
The mysterious life of developers
CLICHE DEVELOPER - which can be spotted by the conference t-shirt and the pale skin. Main source nutrition black carbonated liquid.
HIPSTER DEVELOPER - this species only drinks warm liquids based on expensive spices and beans, and his only tool is a so called Macintosh.
for many individuals in the herd it's considered prestigious to not utilize the mouse at all.
The herd works towards a common goal, a goal set by the project owner. When the project owner arrives the developers often hide digital image of cats from their screens........
https://youtube.com/watch/...1 -
The feeling I had when my final year project idea hit me.
I am so excited and relieved.
It's hard to come up with project ideas this days, really!!!
-
I bet you use HTML as a programming language.
I bet you right click to open a .ipynb file.
I bet you find the answers in a stackoverflow questions.13 -
Friend: have you ever noticed this problem X? What if we could...
Me: stop right there, I smell a kickstarter7 -
quotes of best times
"You would never have a bug if you don't write a code"
"Your code could never crash if you don't run it"
"Your program can never fail if you don't test it"
"Your startup could never be unsuccessful if you don't deploy"4 -
So I am trying to implement a deep learning paper.
And I started reading, It's fucking unbelievable
First page: maybe I will get it in the second page!!
Second page: what did I miss from the first page?
Third page: Woohw, let me start over.
Now: I am reading about linear algebra and basic probability theories.
I guess this is is why not anyone can be on deep learning research areas and not used by many developers.4 -
- woke up at 2:00 AM to read,
- read how sleep makes you healthy, active, smart
- went back to sleep,
- wake up in the morning and felt freaking awesome,
~best decision of my life -
I am a 4th year student. I already got a job and a promising company.
Should I finish my university program or drop out?17 -
Top 5 richest people.
1.People that own Powerbeats pro
2.People that own AirPods
3.Jeff Bozo
4.Bill Gates
5.Warren Buffet10 -
So we finished our requirement ( barely) for a new client. Next is data modelling and system design.
We started with data modelling. Unfortunately the lead developer does not know the difference between database and data modelling.
me: hey bro, we'll do the database and stuff later, now let's focus on data modelling.
him: (acting like he knows) yeah I have developed a sample design for the "data model".
me: no this is database design.
him: what's the difference?
me: dude, they're totally different. Okay, simple explanation data model is what you want to store, whereas DB design is how you store it.
him: So, if I am not wrong, it's implied that you know what to store if you are talking about how to store it.
me: but you don't know what it is you want to store yet. And one of them precedes the other.
him: Okay, let's start with DB design.
me: What?????? you want to build a house without a plan??? That's it for me I am done !!!
I left the project yesterday, later I heard that, the team members are coders, who think that developing a software is all about coding and fixing errors. -
So, school is starting tomorrow. And to be honest I am glad, unlike those poor lazy ones who happen to act as if they have more important things to do and education is not for them.
It’s the 21 century morons, sure it doesn’t have to be a regular education. But you are not gonna achieve any without proper study. Unless you wanna be a carpenter or sth, oh even that is being automated now days...10 -
Real question:
If I save your data in the cloud and it's raining outside, will I lose my data? or Am I safe?5 -
Google probably knows they fucked up when I click the Next button
And yes I am adding this pick just to get your attention.
9 -
They say that we are weird,
they say we don't have passion,
they say we don't have life,
they say we are a sacrifice for the world
.
.
I say we are the best mind who can save the world from its own. WE ARE PROGRAMMERS!!!
(except for C# programmers of course)5 -
#NIPS2018 The main conference sold out in 11 minutes 38 seconds
AI conferences are like concerts these days, haha1 -
I have searched the universe of how go lang developers modularize their api server.... I couldn't find any.. Except for this git repo https://github.com/velopert/...
So, what kind of architecture or pattern do you use? Oh, and I am more interested in MVC4 -
The moment when you are reading and the screen goes black multiple times 😄😄
.
.
Just take a break.... -
So, are we gonna ignore the fact that Pied Piper could have been successful, had they used if else on the encryption to block the AI from tampering with an encrypted data?3
-
Does Firefox know that MacBooks don’t have “esc” button?
Does it notify like
YouTube.come is full screen press esc to exit.5 -
I was trying to build this AWESOME react native application.
1. install npm and react native [3 min]
- oh wait install yarn [about 10 min]
- how about expo 1 min
- and install expo on my phone [ 1min]
2. create a react native app
umm install pod [10 min]
run npm ... figure failures and stuff [20 min]
it's been almost 1 hour now and I forgot what I was building.2 -
me on typing on Google ...
How to write a keyboard logger script and upload to a password protected computer?
:xD that evil plan.6 -
Can anyone tell me how I can integrate Mongo DB with golang?
I found go-bongo, but it's not well documented.5 -
Clicking on links you want to know but you are never learning it soon, so you click it and comfort yourself.
Who can relate? -
when someone suggest you a project idea out of their genius mind,
and the story is either it's impossible or there are tons of implementations.
you'll be like " you are so naive, you don't know anything", but you can't say that because you wanna make friends. -
New device: "iPhone air"
There is nothing other than air. Yeah, you just assume that there is an iPhone. Or you don't, it's completely up to you.
we are ~Apple~ -
I selected a random pic and showed it to ma fella
and I said <<programmers will understand this>>
::: he was staring at it for a moment and he started laughing confirming that he got it! But it really doesn't mean any !!!
#Lol1 -
Has anyone ever had to choose either to write the remaining letters of a word in the NEXT line or just jot down below that same line?4
-
First Program prints : Hello world!
Advanced
First AI Program:
text1.concordance("monstrous")
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,monstrous,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,,,,,,,,,,monstrous, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
,,,,monstrous,,,,, ,,,,,, ,,,
#Feeling greate -
Teacher: who is the founder of microsoft
A) Mark zukerburg B) Bill Gates
Stud: me teach
Teacher: Jhon
Jhon: A) Mark zukerberg
Teacher: no any one else
If you know what i mean3 -
meecrob (mic' rob):
‘meecrob’ is a curse word that is far worse than ‘sh-t’. It is that stuff you get as an appetizer at Thai food restaurant. It tastes way grosser than shit.
The knights of standards and practices (the royal order of standards and practices) prevent this word and other ‘words of curse’ from being over-used. if a curse-word is spoken too much, gelden (the monster) will rise and destroy the earth.
mekrob is one of the worst of these words and is hated by GOD, as much as it is by Eric cartman.
E.g:
1. Eric cartman would scarf down a wet bucket full of shit before he ate another plate of meecrob.
Fans: please raise your hands. -
Sophia is smarter than I thought
me: Hey Sophia, are you as smart as they say?
Sophia: For I am just a face, I am not smart.
but my friends at Hanson robotics are
working hard making me look smart. :)
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