I know a few developers who do this 😂

!Rant
I GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE TODAY WITH MY DEGREE IN COMPUTER SCIENCE!

Now to find a job :D

C: application not working
Me: k. What changed?
C: we didn't make changes
Me: k... *gets a tech team (W) on the phone*
W: Hey, what's broken?
Me: C's application. How do things look?
W: running healthy. I'll check logs.
Me: thanks. *gets tech team (S) on the line*
S: hey, everything clear on our end, will check logs.
Me: thanks *gets tech team (U)*
U: hey! They asked us to deploy their new version today during normal deployment time. Is it acting up?
Me: C, what did you change?
C: nothing major, just how we connect to W and S...
W&S: are you shitting me???
Me: U, will you please roll it back?
C: no! Must stay on this version, you need to fix your side!!
Me: nope. *calls U boss (UG)*
UG: U, you have my permission to roll back, they need to fix. C, if your boss doesn't like it, have them call me.
*rollback fixes problem*

IF I FUCKING ASK YOU WHAT THE FUCK YOU CHANGED, YOU BETTER TELL ME THE TRUTH, OR I WILL STRIP YOUR CODE OFF OUR FUCKING SYSTEMS AND SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT. MY JOB IS TO HELP YOU AND YOU NEED TO BACK TO FUCK UP AND NOT GET IN THE WAY OF MY JOB OR YOU WON'T HAVE ONE ANYMORE.

Swag of a Data Scientist 😎

The Great Escape. by Apple!!

I accidentally sent my password to slack channel!!

I have deleted it and changed my password of course, but it still doesn't make the embarrassment go away. Especially because my password is something ridiculous like :

Materialisticbitch88$$$

Some people have already seen it!!
RIP my reputation.
:/

There is a group of ladies who work in the accounting department at my job who have made it their mission to decorate the cubicle of whoever has a birthday on a given day. They come in at 6 am on someones birthday and decorate, leaving a mess of balloons and streamers, which is a nice surprise the first time it happens (they do it every year). Well, we in the IT office decided it would be fun to booby trap one of our cubicles so that when our birthday rolled in, they would receive a surprise of their own. So we set up a webcam as a motion detector, and had the computer speakers turned up as loud as possible, so that when motion was detected, the honorable Admiral Akbar would yell "It's A Trap!". We succeeded in scaring the pants off of them, and also annoying them because the sound did not stop until the program was exited, so they had to listen to it the entire time they did their setup. It was priceless xD

😂
Courtesy - xkcd.com

When my impostor syndrome is going rampant.

Wtf Microsoft...

Found out the hard way that copying a line of code from Teams chat will sometimes convert the spaces into unrecognized ASCII char.

Spent a few hours yesterday to fix the bad chars.
🤡👍

OMFG!! I just discover a fucking bug in a library used by thousand of people in scientific community!! 🤩🎉

Started when my program outputting strange result. I was in a huge fight with my supervisor about one of the function from the library. My hunch was telling me that this function is the source of the problem, but he insisted that no such bugs could exist in the library that has been used by thousands of people.

I couldn't reproduce the bug so I just stayed silent at that time,
But now, I finally got the bug showing. Yeah I am gonna shove it to his face next week.✊
I will also let the people who maintain the library know.
Feels so good being able to be a contributor PR to this famous library 😎

The downside is now I can't use this function, I have to implement by own function.

Career Goals:
Be able to work from home.

There should be a devrant Meetup one day. Basically The community just gets together, rants about stuff to each other but in person so we all meet our social interaction requirements for the year. Then we could buy swag and sit on our computers and work on our personal/group projects. It would give devs a great excuse to take a vacation once a year.

I absolutely hate the way we are taught programming in Indian colleges.

FML #1: I'm pursuing a UG CS course, and this semester, I only had one subject of Computers, that too only 1 credit. The rest with all electronics.

FML #2: In that 1 credit course, we had to make a C++ project which had "data handling". No one cares if you build something cool or not, just that a project should have "extensive use" of data handling.

FML #3: Source code had to be >= 1000 lines. This is the only place where ADDING MORE LINES OF CODES THAN REDUCING IT is appreciated. Had to stuff my code with all kinds of comments and violating the basic principle of DRY.

So, yeah, we're fucked big time. 😥

The number of tabs opened in the browser is directly proportional to the completely of the problem! :p

Somebody is very active!

TL;DR Setup computer for new guy @ office, he got mad about software he was missing that we weren't told he needed, so he complained to the director above our department and got us in trouble.

I work for a small company, in which the I.S. Department is 8 people (Manager Included). We do everything from setting up computers and fixing printer problems to writing custom software for in-house use. Kind of a "Renaissance Department" if you will.

So a few weeks ago we were asked to set up a computer for a brand new user, meaning he would need email setup, a domain account, etc. We were also given a (very) small list of programs he would need to do his job. No problemo, took me 30 minutes, and he was good to go.

Last week I met the guy because he was training at the general office and his training computer lacked a few tools. Since I was called to remedy that situation, I introduced myself, told him if he ever had any problems to let me know and I would get him fixed up.

Now today, 5/5/2017, 15 seconds after walking into the door of the department, I am pulled aside by my boss and asked if I setup up the new guys desktop, to which I proudly replied yes. Come to find out the (very) small list of tools we were told he needed was incomplete, so he was missing stuff (how the fuck were we supposed to know that). So what does the new fuck do? HE COMPLAINS TO A DIRECTOR ABOVE OUR DEPARTMENT SAYING THE IT GUYS DIDN'T SETUP HIS COMPUTER PROPERLY! Like holy shit dude, why not send me a fucking email like you did before telling me you needed stuff? I would have GLADLY fucking helped. Now I hope your computer catches on fire. Or you get fired. I'll take either one.

I want to print this pic out in enormous size and qty, hang them in many classrooms to show my female friends that it's normal to wear cute skirt and cute shoes while wringing cables on your shoulders.

😏

we have all been here on one side or the other...

This is how we view Kaspersky Anti-Virus at my office.

My wife is complaining that am spending too much time on devRant. I just told her, am coming here only when windows is updating :p ;)

if people are curious of the PTSD baggage i'm carrying and why i rage so much at everything, see attached picture

granted, this was partly my fault, as i said, i was far too nice, and stayed for far too long

also note this job was AFTER a 2+ previous e-commerce job with ultimately failed project and little pay

UG i mean LOOK at this... i could go on and on for hours "push notifications must run" - yeah a casual bullet point that needs to be finished by end of day? hahahaha

How to solve windows Blue Screen Of Death.

Change the color to Green. No more BSOD. :/

<div id="!rant">
Finally have a full time job lined up for when I graduate in a month!
</div>

Finally I got a speed up in my GPU!
😎😎🎉🎉

I graduated last weekend. Walked in the commencement ceremony, took pictures, posted a !rant here, the whole 9 yards. Then what happens? I get an email from the dean of the engineering college at my university stating that my degree check was done incorrectly and that I am 3 credit-hours short of graduating, it is too late to sign up for an intersession course, and there are now 3 credit-hour courses offered as 8-weel courses. So here I am, with two Job interviews coming up, without my degree, wondering why the hell I found all this out A WEEK AFTER I "Graduated"! DA FUCK!!!!!

!rant

I just wanted to say how much I freaking love this place. I come here every day, and what I find is a magical community of people who are accepting of everyone, supportive of each others hopes and dreams and sympathize with those struggling with jobs or school or just life in general. DevRant honestly makes the world a better place, at least for me. Thank you @dfox and @trogus for this beautiful Eden!

Me thinking that getting a job in tech is easier than getting a non-tech job because we are "in demand".

How I find most "modern" JavaScript frameworks

I've developed an interesting habit. I wear a hat 24/7. The same exact hat.
I (almost) never wear my hat backwards. I think its weird, and I look weird, and its just too much weirdness.

There is one exception to this rule.

Before I begin coding each day, before a single stroke of my keyboard, I turn my hat backwards. I don't know why I started doing this, but it is almost as if my hat is a key and turning it unlocks all my programming knowledge.

Anyone else have a quirky habit they do before/during a coding session?

That awkward moment when you made some changes in your code and hope that it will fail so that you can confirm your theory/suspicion.

Otherwise you'll have no idea what's going on.

: /

🤨🤨??

Prof: "Hey, you can take a look at the source code that we used last year in this research paper"
Me :(surprise because other papers usually don't share source code), "Okay"

A few weeks later:
Me: "Prof, if you use method A instead of method B, you can get better performance by 20%. Here's the link"
Prof:"The source link that you mentioned is for another instrument, not GPU"
Me:"Yeah, but I tested in on GPU and I found it is also applied in my device"
Prof:"That's interesting."
-----------------------------------------------------
This is why folks, sharing the source code that you used in scientific papers is important.

Is your 20-line long signature detailing your role, team, office location, other office locations, company division, place of birth, etc. really necessary? And on every email in the same thread?

If only there were some previous example of a mouse with a cord in a more convenient spot Apple could've used as a reference...

At least you don't need a mouse to commit, push and stare at devRant😅.

Me 2 days ago :
"I have applied to so many places, and did lots of interview for my internship. Still no result so far. Maybe I need to take some odd jobs to cover my bills while I improve my coding skills. Rent and food need to be paid, you know.
But I will keep applying to at least 40 companies before I change my strategy"

Me today :
"OMFG, they offered me a position despite my very bad interview!!"
🤩

So whoever is still looking for a job out there, don't give up man... We are in this together.👍👍

"Me getting ready to squash the bug" vs
"Me after fixing the bug caused by my own stupidity"

Connect a pen drive, format it successfully. Connect to a new machine to copy data and see the data exists.

Crap! which drive did I formatted :(

Found out other team's project result about performance for uni assignment. It's that Matlab is the fastest, followed by python and C++ is the slowest.

They are gonna get roasted during presentation (by many people in the audience including me).
This is gonna be fun.
/*devilish grin*/

Request: Need stress ball
Reason: Learning JavaScript

I'm doing it. I'm taking the plunge...
Linux here I come! No turning back now!

came across this in a python blog!

At the end of each work day, once I am sitting down, I take a moment to do a little stress relief exercise.

I get in my car, make sure all doors/windows are shut, make sure the coast is clear, and I yell at the top of my lungs.

The relief is almost instant. And even if it was a good day, sometimes a good, loud yell can just help to relieve any build up tension, anxiety, or stress you may not have known you were under. Give it a try (:

If I do it in python : Finish in one day!
If I do it in C++ :
1 week for installation and configuration
3 days for coding
Another 1 day for troubleshooting...

But I will still prefer do it in C++.

Damn! Always during deadline!! :/

Skills required for ML :
Math skills:
|====================|
Programming skills :
|===|

Skills required for ML with GPU:
Math skills:
|====================|
Programming skills :
|====================|

/*contemplating career choice*/
: /

I attended a 2-days scientific conference last week which lasted from 9 AM-7 PM.
I submit my travel expenses today and the university adm got guts to tell me that
I should commute 6 hours everyday to that place instead of staying in a hotel.

Please people, I contribute making our research and name renown to the public. I don't even get paid doing that (did it for the sake of experience).
The least you can do is to support the accomodation. The penny pinching you did in the name of cost saving is embarrasing.

I didn't like every hour spent working in the uni, yet people still ask me why I won't continue to PhD.
No offence to all PhDs out there. It's just that my practical and money-oriented ass couldn't
stand all the free work I have to do if I do that.
I'd rather work in a supermarket, at least I'm getting paid of what I'm worth.
😕

Our marketing just change the blacklist/whitelist terms to blocklist/allowlist to make it more "neutral" following change in github "master branch" to "main branch"

When will this end, people ?
:/

I'm a noob so I was dumb enough to google 'Eyeballs' in case it's a kind of tools that I don't known yet.
😕

Forget TDD, BDD...
Use GDD.
(Google Driven Development)
:P :D

Previously, I rant in twitter but none of my followers understand them.
So now I am gonna switch here.

Please bear with me. (^.^)d

Petition to change the Anonymous logo from this to this
🤡🤡

!Rant
Just scheduled an interview for a full-time programming position with a company for after my graduation in the fall! Super Stoked!

Every project ever :
Initial plan :
||===================|| 100 %
Actual submission
||==|| 13%

- Not enough money!
- Not enough people!
- Not enough time!
- Not enough resources!
- Hardware not supported
- Software not supported
- My team are useless
- God didn't like it. :/

S̠̪͓͓͐̑̑ͥȉ͎̦̬̱̤̣ͯ̆ͩ̃̌n̦̙̙̦͉̟̟͋ͬ̉ͫ̍̈́̚c͓̰͚͚̆̎ͦͫe ̹ͨ̚ͅt̠̟̦͍͕̑̾ͬͬ͒ͦͅǒ̪̩̑m͍̖̭o̝̬͚̦̥̺r͌̋ṙ̒̐̄ò͙͓ͭw ͩ̔̿̎ͤ̋ͮi̼̭̦ͥͣ͒s̪̰̃̂ ̲̰̮̣̮̌ͭͬ͆̔H͉̳a̠̲̟̹͓̰͎͐͆ͥ̓͋̍̎llo̱̺͖̲͑̒̿ͨw̜͓̟̺̹̹ḙ̭̳̬͇̻ê͖̼̮ͥ́n͉̺͑̽,̫̲ͪ̅ ̫̲͓̟̳̋͊̇̆̈̓ͅľ̠̰̅et̠̩̟̦͉̦͕͐̓ͦ͌ͩͥ̓s̱̓ p͔͚͈͎̰͓̘ra̰̘̥̗̲̯͓n͎̪̠̗͎̬k̈ͬ̊͛̉̅̚ ȏ̻͇̫̰̞ͣ̌̄̌uͤͭ͑ͯr͉̗ͅ ͊̊ñ͙̯͈͑͑o̗̙̍ͤn-͚̘͎̣͑͊͑̇̔ͅtͨ̽̿͑̇̚ḙ̱̾ͭc͍h ̯͖̓ͯf͓̗̥͔̥̬̎͒ͤ́͒ͯr͍͙̋̋ȉ̤en̥̻̦̥d̟̜̟ͬͩ̈́s͍͕̦̭̣͉̿̔̇ͯͥͬ ̲͛w̞̽i̥͕̙̹ͅt͖̠͕̒̍̈́h͉ ͊͐ẗ̒́̄̍͊h̗̜͔ͅi̖̟̫ͪͨ͊͊́ͅͅs ͚̩̟̐ͦͩ̔ͅz̰̫̦̹͖̙ͅḁ̗̬̪̪̰̋̐̂̈́̑͆l͂̓͐̈́g͖ŏ͓̘̳̝̩͍̯͆̈̎̈̍̚ ̫̞͕̺̣̌ͬ͛͋̿t̤̰͍̼̘͖͈́̇̄̂ͭͬͮe̘͖̠̠̓̊ͤ̅x͉͙͎͈ͩ̂̉͂t͙̞̣̖͖̀̎̽ͮ̇.͎̣̤

The guy I work with was pissed because I asked him the status of his task during the daily meeting.
He doesn't want me to embarrass him because he hasn't finished this task. He said not to push him further as he will do it soon.

Dude, the point of having a daily meeting is to give updates of all pending tasks. it's been one week, you're procrastinating on this task is delaying the progress of my task.
Mind you, this guy has a PhD but he can't even understand a simple project management like this.

Hehehe this whole team is clown world 🤪🤡

My non-programmer friend (a mechanical engineer) has better pay doing what she loves.

I have lower pay, clocking more hours, and stress, doing a subject that I don't like.

Should I change profession?
: /

I prefer Tribble debugging over Rubber Duck debugging.

Woke myself up shouting hdcp at 4:40 am today!!!

I was explaining what hdcp was to my sister in the dream, why the HDMI cable wouldn't work..

Had a chuckle and continued to sleep, realizing what a nerd I am 😆

Who dreams about hdcp and hdmi cables?

Esc :/

This guy told me that I was unprofessional because I called him reckless.
He thought that reckless is unprofessional word?!

Are you fucking kidding me?! 🤬

I was just pointing out his recklessness of wanting to delete files in our shared platform without permission from the owners.
These files may be important and he only gave us 1h to back it up. He's the one being unprofessional.🤪

Anyhow, this is not the first time I have had a fight with him, and certainly won't be the last.

Me : "I need to stop geeking out about security because I have exams and need to write a report"

Me 2 hours later : "Ooooo.. what's this cool article about?Let's check it out 😎"

My laptop's fan is blowing so fiercely like someone is trying to mine a crypto on it.

: /

What is your least favorite programming language and why is it JavaScript?

Me working in High Performance Computing :
CPU/GPU in full throttle ... go brrrr...

Me working on an app:
Should put sleep() in the while loop so as not to overwork the CPU

😑😑

Unpopular opinion:

- It's not a guarantee that someone who gets into tech because he/she likes gaming will be a good dev

- It's not a guarantee that someone who gets into tech because he/she likes money will be a bad dev.

Here's how I describe my workplace:
- a mid dev that will stay mid forever
- a senior but with junior skill
- a mid but actually a junior
- a verbose dev, people having rough time trying to understand her because her explanation is always blown up
- a PM without enough technical skill
- a dev with personality like a moody teenager
- a contractor but acting like a customer

Did I miss anything? 🤔

Those of you who like "The Imitation Game", you probably want to check out "Hidden Figures" (2016). It's on Netflix now.

About a team of female African-American mathematicians who wanted to "break the glass ceiling" in NASA.
- Dorothy : conquered the (recently acquired) IBM frameworks using Fortran and taught her team to program it
- Mary : appealed to court to be allowed to study in a all-white school to get her qualification to be an aerospace engineer
- Katherine : her skills in analytical geometry enabled her to be the first female African-American in the Space Task Group in calculating the momentous capsule launch into orbit

My lazy ass just can't fathom how someone who deals with so much math and pressure can still smile to their family after work. My grumpiness nature will surely turn me into a monster.

And now I know what "human computers" means.

Breakfast of Champions

My mom (a single mother who had to feed 4 kids) feed me, let me stay in her house (at least until I was 21) and let me use the motorcycle.
Instead of running away and giving up her children to child institution (because that's probably what I will do being a selfish person that I am)
If that's not support, I don't know what that is anymore.
It might not be much but at least it gave me the time to grew up and be independent to pursue my dream of working in IT.

Her strength and toughness facing the hard life is also the main inspiration for me to keep going, to prove that I can do whatever I want if I put enough effort on it.

I have only been working with this open-source tool for 2 weeks, but already found 2 bugs. The maintainer is also nice enough answering questions quickly in the forum and submitting the issues for me.

It's nice to be able to contribute something to the open-source community. Yay for me! 💯

Too bad that next week, I will transfer to another project and stop working with this tool.

Every engineer in my company seems to be passionate about the industry we're in.
For example:
If we're in a medical industry, they're excited about being able to help sick people with the medical devices that we program. They're excited about the news/progress in the medical communities. They have something more motivating beyond creating tech tools.
For me, it's just a job with a paycheck. I don't drink their kool aid. I'm occasionally excited if I managed to create new things with new software tools.
I am often jealous with them, because they seem to be already working in their dream job, instead of having cold dead eyes like mine.

Last year, my current manager promised me a significant salary increase if I transferred to his team. He said that's because his department has bigger budget. So I did.

Today I received a notification for a 5% salary increase. 😂

I am a dummy for trusting him. 🤡
There's a reason why a lot of my former colleagues are no longer in the company.

Never fully trust your company folks!

Other people : save money to buy car, house, etc...

Me : save money to pay for this f*cking degree where 80% of what they taught will be useless after graduation.

: /

The look I give to my friends when they asked dumb questions in class.

When being a developer means you give up sleep :p

"Some days I amaze myself.
Other days I look for my phone while I'm talking on it".

😑

My Debug Ghost to go with my Debug Tribble at work. Best part is he is entirely 3D Printed!

Never thought I would like a standing Desk, but this is pretty great. Got horrible sleep last night, was falling asleep at my desk, so I stood up and pulled the desk up and WAM! No more sleepiness! Who needs Coffee or Soda when you have the power of STANDING.

Because of high gas price, the government decided to lower our tax.
For me it translates to additional EUR 11/month ☹.
This is after deductions of thousands of euros each months (tax and social contribution) from my hard-earned salary. How come nobody is complaining about this?

During my yearly review, I told my manager that I expect to see significant salary increase next year (the inflation is 9% duh!).
She told me that I can expect to get 20% increase after 3-4 years. ☹
Now I know why a lot of people are leaving. How can you expect your employer to stay put if you're constantly paying them under market rate?! I have to keep switching jobs every 4-5 years to get a decent pay, right? Yet society expect me to settle down and have a stable job.

And then, how come a PM earn significantly more than a regular dev? Even the job interview is much easier. But I like the technical part too much to switch to people management.

By no means, I am starving right now working as a dev. I am happy that I even have a job, but somehow I felt like what I do is pointless just being a wage slave, and felt demotivated in a lot of ways.

P.S.: I am writing this now in front of my work computer. I have to catch up some work to do otherwise I won't have time to do it during the weekdays 😔
Pray for me guys I can get better job within next year.

The whole dev community.

Those who have dedicated time and energy to share solutions, tricks, bug-solving ideas, codes that I can steal; teach me patiently even though I am slow, cheer me up when I am down because I'm stuck debugging for hours, brighten me up with programming jokes when I am sad.
Those who have allowed me to earn good money in the field that I really enjoy.

Yeah, including you 😘

Annual inflation rate = 9.2%.
My annual salary increase = 5.5% (from my meager salary as junior)

Thanks management 🤡👍

!rant
:D

I have a coworker who, when frustrated with a bug in his code then finds the simple solution, loudly exclaims "You Idiot", or "Ah dammit", or "What the Hell?!". He also belches loudly, and says a few other humorous things throughout the day. It has inspired me to make a sound board that would say whatever he would say in a given situation. Don't think it will ever get built, but it sure would be hilarious!

If I have the same privileges (time, money, connections, environments, energy etc) that they have, I will surely achieve 3x more.

I am not trying to find an excuse, that's the reality. I already achieved way more than most people with the same background. I should be proud of myself, and other people who think otherwise can go fuck themselves.

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

How can I make my manager understand that performance should not be measured by how many tickets we have resolved?

If the ticket is an easy one then sure 1-2 days is enough, but for some complicated shit or dealing with models that I have never touched before, I am gonna need several days just to understand the requirement.

For some fucked up reason, our story point is in hours, instead of days. So when we say 24 hours, then it's only 3 days.

Another fucked up reason is that my colleagues doesn't seem to mind. I am the most vocal one objecting when got assigned too many tickets. They just joke around and seem to accept it.

FYI, I am just 6 months in and bouncing between 3 projects.
Am I just too lazy or slow?
In my previous company, the devs seemed to be pretty chill, and the project manager only complained when an issue has been dragging on for weeks.

Got my stickers in the mail today, just before I left for my new job. Thanks from Ireland devRant

Can someone tell me how a mid level developer with a PhD from EU country is unable to work independently, conduct investigation by himself without too much hand-holding?
Is he too allergic to use google search?

Or is it me that have too much expectation? He's been in our team for 3 months, he should be able to search docs/procedure/files by himself now. Is it me that are too workaholic nerdy and he's just a normal person?
🤔
Thankfully he's the nicest person in our team, but I am getting fed up having to answer his questions many times.

Friends were having great and fun time last night partying after (also) last week partying.
And now someone's having friends over for dinner in the shared kitchen.
While here I am hours staring at my screen trying to break the algorithm.
: /
______________________________
Me : Enough with coding! I need social life!
5 min later :
*Checking devrant and reddit/programminghumor

Intend to help a friend to find out what's wrong with a software installation in his laptop today...
But forgot that his Windows installed in Chinese version... how am I supposed to help.... (; _ ;)
I can't read Chinese... can't even find how to open Control Panel...
_________________________________
My native language is not English, but I always have all my techies set up in English.

I've made it to the big leagues gentleman... Yay avatar!

I am in the mood for anything at 11 PM-5 AM.
Cleaning the house, studying, coding ...
Juices of ideas, energy and focus are just overflowing.
Too bad that I have to follow "normal people" schedule which starts at 9 AM.

:/

Rediscovering the wonderful Devrant community and reading through old rants. So much fun to see where I was just a few years ago and where I am now. Feels like a lifetime ago. Glad to be back!

github is down :(
Lets me open devrant :) yeahhhhh!!!!

Friends/Seniors : "Hey, you should take these courses. They are easy and you can get easily an A!"

Who the fuck decide what optional courses to take based on if it's easy or not?!
Students take them because :
a. They are interested in the subjects
b. Knowledge/skills after attending the courses will be beneficial for future career.

I put my money more on option b though, i.e I'd rather get C's in courses that I found it useful, than getting A's in useless courses.
(Btw, my avg grade is just a little above Cs)
If my sole purpose was just to get straight A's, I would enroll in liberal art courses instead of this stressing half-CS course we're in.
You're a joke to yourself, that's why I don't hang out with you.

The reason why I like to code alone in the dark is so that people cannot see my dumb mistakes such as 'forgetting to hit run after compile and wasting 10 min wondering why my code didn't show on the console'.

: /

Me everytime before our daily meeting:

"Breath in Breath out ...
I am not gonna pick a fight with anyone today ..."

I've only been here for 1 month for my new position in Ops, and I already miss software development!

All I do everyday is just typing commands on the terminal.
If I am feeling fancy, I may create a script or two (that's the closest thing I have to writing code).

I hope I can get more interesting thing to do in the future. If not I can't see myself doing this in long term. It's OK for occasional tasks or added responsibility but I don't want to do it as my main job.

What I want to write :
//TODO : Parallelized this sh*t ???

What I actually write :
//TODO : Parallelized this part later if possible (i.e after checking if overhead doesn't cost too much)

Sigh.. I want to add more of my personality in my code.
: /

I just bought my laptop last year.
But I already crash it several times due to my horrendous C++ programs.
Lifespan is greatly reduced.

/*Please bear with me, sweety!
At least, until graduation!*/
: /

My first time doing a pair-programming for uni assignment.
My partner is actually smart (a Mechanical Engineering guy), except when it comes to programming :
1. Don't know how to spell FALSE
2. Don't know how to create array in Matlab
3. Poor variable naming
4. Redundant code everywhere
5. Not using tabs
6. Stealing my idea and spit it again in my face after claiming it as his idea
7. Mansplaining every line of his code like I am a stupid person who never sees a computer before.

He said he has an experience in Matlab, wants to specialize in Robotics and taking several ML classes. What did they teach anyway in class to produce a shitty programmer like him?

Thankfully despite his being an arrogant shitty guy, he still manage to get our code to works.
That's good because if not, then I will happily push his head under water while slowly watching him drown.

🤨

Interviewer said that passing technical interview means that 90% of the time I will get the offer.
In the final interview with management, I can't answer some questions because I didn't study. Isn't final interview should just about getting to know each other like hobby, interest, talking about company products?
They gave me some puzzle to solve :(

After that, they wait another 1 week just to tell me I don't pass. Why the fuck they wait 1 week just to tell me that? They should just tell me 1 day after!

I still have other job openings right now, but the job searching has been very depressing.
I will give it like 1 more month. But if I can't get any leads, I will just give it up. Maybe tech is not the right job for me.
I will just go back to my old job in non-tech. It's not exactly my dream job, but at least they don't treat me like shit like this.

just found one more *DD
RDD - Readme Driven Development
Its real google around...

:D

I always wonder why the IT guys seem to be short tempered when dealing with dev related issues.
Now I understand...

For a few days I have to help my colleague setting up his new project and dear Lord...
I thought I have enough patience because I am a woman...

This guy is very very junior, I couldn't get any input/ideas from him when debugging
Dear god, help us because I am the only one with enough experience in this project.

Spent 3 weeks working on an issue (raised by dev A) by following the suggested solution stated in the issue.
Pushed a PR and got told by dev B that it's not the correct solution.
Dude, I am just an intern here and following whatever they told me to do. If you have a problem with the solution, please discuss it with dev A.
Now I may have to let go of the issue completely because it turns out to be much more complicated, not for someone with intern level skill.
FML, I guess this won't be the last time I had this right?

I was having a discussion with my Spv because I am stuck at my project, when suddenly he said :
"Hey, you seem to enjoy this subject!"

And I was just standing there speechless..
🤨
Excuse you...
I spent so much time than required in the contract because I'm getting paid and more importantly because I can put this experience in my portfolio.
Not because I enjoy this job.
I'd rather work on my personal project, preparing for job interview or playing with my cats if I have another choice.

He is a nice guy and has helped me a lot, but in the end it's all about the money.
Or maybe because I have a hard time trusting people these days.
I can't wait to start job hunting next month so that I can say goodbye to this job.

In several occasions I run rm -rf * in the wrong folder (or wrong server!!).
No big deal so far, but I had to spent more time to redo my work since Linux has no fucking recycle bin like Win!
So I created this helper function to give my brain a few seconds to think before my finger hit Enter.

delete_all_files()
{
echo "WARNING:Delete all files? Type fluffycat to proceed"
read x
if [ "$x" = "fluffycat" ]
then
echo "Deleting all files..."
rm -rf *
fi
}
alias myrm=delete_all_files

Hehehe... I am a genius 😎

When it is Friday and you want to be productive, but you have spent the entire time since sitting down at work fixing Visual Studio and its bullshit.

Does anyone keep a journal as they develop code? Something to keep track of ones thought process so that you understand what you were thinking when you come back to it? I know most people just use comments, but does anyone use something different?

Q: "What's your most hated programming language?"

Me: "Lisp"

**Maniacal laughter from the interviewer**

Spot what's wrong with this command!

It took me 10 minutes scratching head to find it out. This is why we still need to use our brain when copy paste-ing code.
😕

How many job applications did you send to get your first full-time job?

My friend applied for 200 jobs before he got one. I am in my 30s now, but my motivation has almost run out.

The future seems bleak.

Stop pushing your shitty console logs to repository

I am so bored with my job in Devops, I only need a few dirty scripts to run everything...
So much so that I started to search for C++ jobs (going back to my previous background), even though I hate C++.
At least it's going to be more mentally stimulating, they also tend to be paid higher than Devops.

I found a budget salary for dev with 4-5 YOE in 2011 in my company, digging through internal old docs.
Assuming 2% increase per year, the 2023 budget salary is now EUR 15k more than what average dev get in my company.

I remember that someone mentioned similar thing in other socmed where he found through internal docs, salary for his position 10 years ago and now are the same, totally neglecting inflation.
On the other hand house/property values has doubled within 10 years.

How can we pressure companies to give us appropriate salary?
When I ask for increase, they will just say no because it's the market rate, but the market rate sucks.

I am not a PHP dev but this back end error message when accessing /notif looks weird.

Is this a security bug?

PROJECT: New shiny app in js
TODO:
1. Window shopping for new frameworks

Java can just bring out the worst in some people.....

While I was in the bathroom at work, I heard a phone camera shutter click from a stall. What could possibly have been the subject of that photo?

Sick of fucking working with 'engineers' who cannot see that the piece of shit application that they have written is not 'done' until it has been tested. No it is not production fucking ready you fucking yes man.

from Windows host->run Ubuntu container A
-> from Ubuntu container A, run Ubuntu container B
-> from Ubuntu container B, run Ubuntu container C
-> from Ubuntu container C, run Ubuntu container D
-> ....

Recursion-mode ON

After trying 4 different versions of installation, applying patch, digging through obscure sites, down the rabbit hole, finally

ERROR at 97%

(; _ ;)
Back-up plan : Forget everything... buy land somewhere in the in the mountain and be a farmer.

This phising email I just received in my yahoo account almost got me fooled with the very convincing email design, but thankfully the culprit didn't smart enough to spoof his email address.
Ohh and they attach a suspicious pdf file too despite the message didn't say anything about attachment.
Apparently the spam detector in yahoo is not very good as this one was received in my main inbox.

Pissed af at my idiot teammates for dragging down my project grades. But I believe this won't be the last time as there are more idiots out there.

I need the credits to graduate .. sigh...
: /

Got an email from a recruiter.. he went on to outline how great I’d be for the job he had in mind…

Then ended the email with: Let me know if you are interested, OR if you have a referral for this position.

WHAT?! I thought I was perfect for this position.. why are you asking me to refer someone else? Ug.

In my PR :

Senior dev A : "You should change the format according to <link to coding standard>"
Me : "But it doesn't mention anywhere about that format. <senior dev who wrote the standard> also agrees with me. Other reviewers also already approved."
Senior dev A : **proceed to give me an example from a file that's not even in the PR scope**
Me : "I cannot find that file in my PR"
Senior dev A : **give me another example example from my PR**
Me : "Okay I missed that, I am gonna fix it, but other files are already using consistent format. I have already merged changes for 500 files using this format, and I still have 400 files to go.
Do you really want me to revert the changes from 500 files?" :/
Senior dev A : "I don't want to be your enemy, I just want to make our codebase better"
Me : **Mad because he took this personally.**
**I don't want to be your enemy either. I also care about the codebase. I just want to finish this ticket ASAP instead of implementing your cosmetic changes that's not even in the standard so that I can work on another ticket that will have more impact to the company**
Senior dev A : "Ok, I will approve it, just add some whitespaces"
Me : 🤦‍♀️

I sometimes think that some senior dev just want to flex when they're reviewing PR.
They just want to let people know they wield the power.

Friend : Have you take a look at this part? We will discuss it this Friday.
What I want to say :
"Don't underestimate my ability to procrastinate, sleep on my problem, run away from my responsibilities, and don't give a sh*t about everything."
What I actually said:
"Of course but I will look at it again thoroughly."
_______________________
Maybe my frustration and depression are not showing enough on my face.
: /

!dev

Still haven't got a schedule for my master thesis defense after 2 months. The normal deadline is 1 month.
My professor is ignoring my follow up emails, even after the head of the program urging him to finish the review.
I feel discriminated as this didn't happen to other students that worked under him before.
I am job searching now, what if a job offer came but I still couldn't get a graduation certificate because of my delayed defense.
Will the university willing to compensate for the time loss not being able to work?
Maybe I should start finding out how to hire a lawyer in case I have to sue the uni.
😡

Fuck can it just be Friday already

Only Linux guys knows the difference between root and root ;)

pritn object

Every single time... :(

I was sad this morning, because my thesis supervisor being an asshole that I seriously considering to just drop out..
Then I checked my bank statement and salary of 2 months has been deposited today.

Who needs that fucking degree when I earn more than you?
Who's the joke now?! 🤜🤡🤡

I am going to give them a middle finger tomorrow.😉

One of the guys were tasked to implement a button with a functionality.
When I clicked the button, I got an error. Asked the guy why, and he said that fixing the functionality was not part of the task. What? So basically he just put a nice little button that does nothing? And our team lead just approved his merge request?!
I can't comprehend this logic at all.

Another story, I overheard a different guy debugging a pointer array (C++) with a senior. I couldn't keep my face straight when he seems to struggle to dereference a pointer and iterating through an array. He can't do that and he calls himself a mid-level engineer?!

The more I stay in this company, the more I realize that many people in my teams are clowns.

I overheard this mid level dev discussing a new task with a senior dev. They're discussing compile error in cmake. I realized that the mid level dev asked so many basic stuff that are easily google-able. Mind you, our codebase is cmake based, how come she didn't know even the basics and yet survive in our company for years?
I felt bad for the senior dev, as I knew he's busy with his work. He couldn't do his job because he had to do hand-holding with this dev.

My biggest mistake is often trying to solve things by myself which will take hours instead of just asking a senior. But asking other dev for every little things are also annoying. Why can't you just google shit up or RTFM?

!rant
Hello, World! (Couldn't help myself)
What are some of y'all's favorite books? I am finishing Ready Player One right now, and I am looking for some new reading material. Suggestions?

My master thesis is in ramble.
What I thought to be an achievable task in the beginning turns out to be very challenging.
My skill is not up to it.
The assistant prof I worked with is also not very helpful. I thought he's already familiar with the lib I will work with, turns out he's not so I have to study it by myself.
Me : **Asking question A**
Him : **Explaining B, C, D that's not really related to A. My question went unanswered.
Him giving me explanation on things that I already knew**
Me : "How about this code? Can we please focus on the code?!"
Him : **Finally explains the code so I can move forward a little**
Apparently I have to grow fangs and horns to scare people to give me what I want. :/

He and my prof are not in sync about how to solve the task.
They told me that even though I was behind my deadline (30% progress at 50% time), I still have some time before the deadline of the thesis.
The truth is, if I no longer believe that I can solve it, even if they gave me a time extension, it's going to be useless.
My motivation of finishing it is fading away. It's not a subject that I enjoy, the people I work with are not helpful.
I have been in depression for 2 months, and it's taking a toll on my health.
I am seriously considering dropping it and just let go of my master degree. There are many people who can work in IT even though they don't have proper formal education eh?

for (size_t day=0; day < Inf; day++){
printf("I hate you Windows, I am switching to
Linux!");
pause (4hours);
printf("I love you Windows (=^..^=) ");
}

The stickers have made a home on my laptop.

A question for all you grey beards and other more knowledgeable devs:

I work for a small grocery retail company. Work primarily as a dev, but also spend time doing I.T./HelpDesk stuff. My wife is a nursing student, and when she graduates in May 2018 she is wanting to move to a different location to work at a specific hospital, which would require me to change jobs. No problem, I'm fine with that.

Here is what I am wondering: I currently make a modest salary (for 23 years old I feel like I'm doing pretty good), but we are expecting our first child in April and I would like to be making more. Would persuing a different job for extra $$$ that I could potentially only be working at for around 8-ish months be a bad idea? Should I just stick where I am at until I actual HAVE to move?

Thanks in advance for any advice :D

I am just beating around the bush since I started this project, hoping that one day I got lucky and found the shiny solution.

/*sigh*/

Have you interacted with other devs with same level of experience and wondering about the big skill gap between you and them?
Wondering if you are actually a walking genius for having a lot more knowledge/understanding or if they are just plainly dumb and lazy.

🤷‍♀️

@dfox By default there is -1 showing up on all the comments. Its just me or everyone ?

A classmate I haven't seen in 2 years popped up in my Linkedin.
I looked up her profile and it seems like she now works at SWE in okayish company after an internship in a prestigious company.

This throws me a little bit (I am jealous obviously). We've worked in the same uni project before, she's okay when it comes to theoretical courses but a bit behind when it comes to anything related to computer. I would never think of her working as SWE as she did better in traditional engineering (think Civil Eng, Mechanical Eng etc, Aerospace Eng.).

And yet I heard a lot of people online complaining about difficulty of finding graduate/junior position. If a person like her can find something, surely someone with pure CS background should find something easier. But then again, job hunting is 50% pure luck. I have concern on the quality of work that she will produce, but maybe I underestimate her a lot? 🤔

Pretty much anything in Angular...

if(!rant)
{
cout<<"Anyone here ever play the game Screeps? If not, you should really consider checking it out! The point of the game is to write scripts to automate the tasks carried out by your "creeps". Scripts are all in Javascript. Its fun!"<<endl;
}
else
{
cout<<"I hate mondays."<<endl;
}

My department just installed a new high performance GPU, so :
1. Good bye, my old laptop GPU!
2. Let's play around and break the shiny thing! 😎

(more likely I will be the one who break down due to frustration though 😬)

man

I just can't seem to find motivation to code

any suggestions? I really want to get out of this coding slump :(

Join a coding boot camp and cramming myself for technical interview instead of this almost useless master degree.

Does anybody here knows an opening for retail job/cleaning services?

I am so fed up with this sh*t I'm working right now.

: /

Ah yes.. You know the Java?

"We can't install the latest Win 10 features and security improvement on your PC due to low disk space."

Time to clear up.
Should I delete my hands and feet too?
: /

It's continuously raining, so I'm too lazy to access the cloud today.

Ok, can someone explain to me why the old-Unix overlords decided to use -v in 'grep -v' as flag to invert the result.
It's not fucking intuitive.

Other normal utils will use -v as abbreviation of --verbose or --volume ...
I spent some time digging around this particular script scratching my heads why it's not working.
🤔

How do you tell a senior that I don't want to be buddy-buddy with him outside of work?
He keeps trying to befriended me, inviting me to his house along with his friends. I don't think he's romantically interested in me, he's married, he's just too extroverted, has huge social circle.
Being a chronically introvert, I just want to go home and sleep after work. It's enough having him breathing down my neck for 5 days/week, don't want to see his messages during the weekend.
I have to keep the relationship cordial and polite though as my job satisfaction depends on that.

Recently I have had to help our support team handle a variety of embedded development support tickets for a product line that is quite complex in nature. It is really starting become frustrating how common it is that the so-called “developers” that are using this product are so incompetent at requesting help in a proper/sane way. It is even more frustrating that some of these schmucks start acting up and stating bullshit statements like (para-phrasing) “OMG we have a ‘big opportunity’ and a deadline to meet”, “you need to help us faster”. These are also the same guys that are like “I know you have a free SDK that does everything correctly, but I want to write my own ‘pro’ driver written in my own ‘dumbass code style’. Oh and I am not going to follow documentation and not implement required functions and make you read my god awful code snippets to find out what I what I did wrong instead of reading the docs or comparing against the SDK.”

To anyone that behaves this way...fuck you! Just stop. Stop being a developer altogether. If your “opportunity” is so important, why the fuck are you half-assing your support ticket? Why are you making it SO DAMN DIFFICULT for someone to help support you! Give as much info as possible to prove your point or provide context to the problem you are having. In the majority of these tickets the dumbasses don’t even consider that relaying the product’s firmware version is relevant information, that a Wireshark (and/or logic analyzer) capture can be very useful to provide context to the type of operation being performed. Code snippets can be nice but only if there is sufficient context. We have had to ask one guy 3 times already for the FW version...what the flipping hell is wrong with you?!

Ug...I feel sorry for Support/FAEs sometimes dealing with customer bullshit drives me nuts and its a shame this stuff happens in a sector that should know better...Please don’t be like these devs. If you make a half-assed request it is only reasonable to expect a half-assed response and nothing more.

The world needs another Jenkins plugin about as much as we need a new JS frontend framework....

Why are you so slow Kaggle...
(((preparing kernel)))
(((committing)))
I have tons of data to analyze with multiple methods...

sigh...

Weekend ruined supporting legacy and poorly designed services coupled with poor architecture.

But "no project bandwidth" to refactor said services.

5 hours of data loss should now hopefully inspire a backlog re-shuffle.

This is the first time I have a bad PM and it's much worse than having a pain in the ass colleague dev. A bad dev will mess his/work project and maybe slow down 1-2 other devs.
But a bad PM will doom the whole project, wasting lots of time of the devs working under him/her. Costing much more company's money.

PM:This task should be ready by next week.
Me : This task will require X weeks time for developing and delivery
PM: What?! That's too long, it's a simple one, should be done in a few days.
Me: **explaining the challenges, limitation, env set up, testing etc. Also because I am a junior so may take more time than experienced dev**
PM: **insist that this is important blah blah**
Me: Understand your points but X days is just too little, I don't want you to blame me for missing the deadline. Either we get a reasonable deadline or you can get more experienced dev to do it faster.
**Knowing well that I have the most experience in this task and other devs are busy with their own tasks**

In the end I have to escalate this argument to more senior manager because both of us won't budge. Not only she agreed to extend the deadline she also assigned a senior dev to help me when I am stuck.

His other mistakes I noticed during my time working under him:
- not consulting senior dev for the approach to the task (thus we have to change the design twice).
- assigning tasks to people without sufficient background (a java dev is being assigned a python task, it's doable but it's going to be faster if we assign to someone with more python experience right?)
I understand that our company is short-staffed, but I begin to wonder if the stress the devs endure is because of that or because of his incompetence.

Next time, I am going to specifically ask not to work under him again.

If you have messy and disgusting desk, messy and disgusting car, pretty sure your code is messy and disgusting as well.

Sincerely,

Your team who is fed up with maintaining your shitty code

I was a bit confused when my supervisor told me to use Windows VM through Vagrant for testing environment. AFAIK each VM should be treated as a single machine, so it requires a Win license.

There are several criterias for us to be able to use Win WM legally.
One of them is Qualified Multitenant Hoster (QMTH) Program from MS, it authorizes qualified 3rd-party hosting service providers to host customers’ Win VM. Other option is to check if we have on-premise dedicated use rights.

I don't know if we fulfill any of the criteria. I don't want to cause any trouble so I am not gonna ask my supervisor about it.

!rant
Just made the leap from a company with and I.T. Department of 8 people to a company with an I.T. Department of 5000 people. At the old company, I was a SysAdmin, DBA, Helpdesk, Programmer, etc. 7/8 were programmers. We all had our hands in pretty much every aspect of the companies technology. At the new company I am just a programmer. I only write code (well, I will soon. There is a LOT I have to learn about how this place operates). I worked at the old companies for almost 3 years (2 as an Intern, 10 months as Salaried Full-Time) so it's weird having most of those aspects of my old job stripped away, yet at the same time it's somewhat freeing in the sense that I am now only responsible for 1 slice of the pie, not the whole damn thing. Anyway, hope everyone is having a great monday!

I hate when I visit a new web framework's site and see documentation that promotes HTML tags like this:
<input type='text' name='foo' value='{{val}}' />

If you don't know enough about which quotes you should use and why... I have no faith in the quality of your software solution.

- Get into FAANG
- Get into HFT/banks/fintech
- Move to UK/US

@dfox Gifs not playing on android :(

Is it just me that would prefer to work with Senior Engineers rather than mid level engineers?

Some mid level engineers are just pain in the ass. This one guy insist on getting perfection in all of the requirements. The problem is that if you work with software/lib for so long, you realize that most if not all software are buggy or have limitations.You can't expect everything to be perfect. Sometimes something just works/don't work and nobody knows why. Need lots of shortcuts/hacks just to make it work. I would say that 80% completion is good enough, especially since we're running out of time and manpower.

I noticed that Senior Engineers tend to be less strict. If it works then it's good enough, if we found some bugs later then we'll fix it. I like this practicality so we can tackle more important issues at hand.

I hope that I don't have to work in the same project with this guy again.

New project consists of 3 libraries with bunch of dependencies each.
Installation script not working, so here I am combing through the haystack fixing the error messages.

I hate installing stuffs with their dependency nightmares... I just want to start developing, man...😩

Has anyone used the new Visual Studio with Xamarin studio built in to build mobile apps? I was doing some research for my senior (we are thinking of going mobile), and wanted to see what the community thought of it. What do you guys think?

My rant started today

<!-- start of xyzAwesome widget-->
<DIV class = outerWRAPPER >
<DIV id=specialContainer class="small">
<DIV CLASS= "extra-large">
<DIV class="inner_wrapper blue">
What do you mean my code sucks?
</span>
</span>
</div></span>
<!-- end of sub container -->

!rant
Just started a new internal project today. The best thing? The meeting I just got out of, in which we were discussing the details, was with someone with technical knowledge and experience, and who had realistic expectations. Never have I been so happy after a meeting! :D

!Rant
Question for all you wise neck beards:
I was talking with my boss in his office (I'm an intern), and he was saying one thing I need to work on is making more accurate estimates for when a project will be done. He asked if it was just an attempt to "paint a rosey picture" and asked if I was just afraid to be honest, to which I answered definitely not, I just didn't realize I was being that inaccurate. Any suggestions on how I can correct this? I feel like if I just overestimate by a lot i'm just going to give off a lack of confidence, but I also don't want my boss to think I am just lazing around and not working as hard as I could. Feel like I am in a pickle here.

Also, what are some tips you guys have for staying Focused/Productive? I do a pretty good job as it is, but any more advice would be handy :D

Happy Tuesday Everyone!

In those learning days the universal solution to all systems issues -
'restart and see if that fixes'

My Snowflake Tor extension is automatically off every time I start Chrome. I have to turn it off and on for it to activate.
Works perfectly fine on Firefox though.

😕

!rant, but satisfying.

Got pulled in to a demo for some work that I had been apart of previously, but not recently since I had rolled on to a client. The Manager in charge of the work had fought me being pulled on to said client, as he wanted me committed to this project (which I didn't want to be invovled with). I had rolled off the engagement earlier this week, which is why I suspect I was included in this demo. So we are going through the motions, they are asking questions, I'm sitting quietly watching. out of the blue, Manager dude decides he wants to ask me a difficult question, because I'm sure he assumes he will stump me. I respond with "Not sure I'm the best to answer that specific question, since I haven't worked on this in a minute". He confirms that he only wants me to answer. So I do. And boy was I glad his camera was on, because he went from "Got em" to "Fuck, he got me" in a matter of seconds, and I could barely keep from smiling. After my answer, I respond with "Anything else you'd like to know?" to which he mutters "No, thank you" and quickly moves on. Talk about a victory. I'll ride this high through next week, I think.

24 hours of being awake. At Work. Struggling to focus. Using DevRant infusions to keep myself alive.

Yes we do exist. Without having proper requirement we start the development and work on it