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Tinder experience so far
Girl: "hey, what do you do?"
Me: "im a programmer"
Girl:
Me: "and you?"
Girl:
Me: "... hello?"
*Suddenly unmatch*44 -
Last year I built the platform 'Tindex'. It was an index of Tinder profiles so people could search by name, gender and age.
We scraped the Tinder profiles through a Tinder API which was discontinued not long ago, but weird enough it was still intact and one of my friends who was also working on it found out how to get api keys (somewhere in network tab at Tinder Online).
Except name, gender and age we also got 3 distances so we could calculate each users' location, then save the location each 15 minutes and put the coordinates on a map so users of Tindex could easily see the current location of a specific Tinder user.
Fun note: we also got the Spotify data of each Tinder user, so we could actually know on which time and which location a user listened to a specific Spotify track.
Later on we started building it out: A chatbot which connected to Tinder so Tindex users could automatically send a pick up line to their new matches (Was kinda buggy, sometimes it sent 3 pick up lines at ones).
Right when we started building a revenue model we stopped the entire project because a friend of ours had found out that we basically violated almost all terms.
Was a great project, learned a lot from it and actually had me thinking twice or more about online dating platforms.
Below an image of the user overview design I prototyped. The data is mock-data.
51 -
Recently I've installed Tinder. Had my first match yesterday.
Me: "I see you're a product manager in a software company. Do you get along well with programmers? :)"
No reply. Unmatches. 😶18 -
devRant should make their own version of Tinder. All this lonely devs could really use a partner to cheer up their life 😄12
-
Got matched with a cute girl on Tinder. She was a recruiter. She didn't want to talk about anything other than this "great" opportunity...12
-
Be me
- register on tinder, mentioning I'm a developer
- start using
- first profile
- I like this first profile, I swipe right
- IT'S A MATCH
- get immediately unmatched22 -
>installed Tinder®
*after 5 mins
>felt like a loser
>uninstalled Tinder®
>back to coding
BETTER!!!26 -
Matched with a girl on Tinder who studies Artificial Intelligence.
Me: "I see you study AI, how cool! Is it hard?"
She hasn't texted back for 3 days
What did I do wrong?34 -
Tinder is the worst app out there. I keep receiving notifies like "hey honey! You received x new likes!" or "you're performing well! A lot of people are appreciating you".
What's the problem, you say... well, the problem is that I HAVE NO A FUCKING ACCOUNT, I deleted my account months and months ago and if you want you can try it as well. Download, sign up, set the worst photo that you can find then delete your account, you'll receive a lot of awesome messages!
Actually I received these fake notifies also when my account was active, and when I opened it then I discovered that there was no new likes. But was so fucking hard to put an if statement to check if the user's account is active? Come on... I know you want to trick people and convince them using your app, at least do it the right way2 -
Whoever coded tinder and bumble, fuck you for preying on desperation to try to make a quick buck.
Dating apps are just a tool for attractive folks to get quick self validation and for desperate folks to lose even more self esteem.18 -
I met my girlfriend via online dating and she is often checking out recipes on social media, so I came up with the idea to combine cooking and Tinder as a tiny side project.
I built an app that lets you swipe recipes to add them to your cookbook and called it "Daily Cook" and it is available on both Android and iOS. :)
13 -
I am developer.
Discussing the design of our App, he asked me whether I have used tinder. I replied, "No, never had to..."
He laughed out hard and also told his colleague this joke.
I am a developer.
But... I am also a gamer, not a player 😎
I dont need tinder, I have Counter-Strike.8 -
So I met this chick on tinder, I kinder wanna know her, turns out, she is a hooker so she asked for money, I straight told her bitch please why pay for license when there is open-source
3 -
Haha the amount of people ranting here about how they can't get a girlfriend, we should soon get a tinder plugin.7
-
First and last time I used tinder, the guy figured that I know sOmeThIng aBoUt Co_0mpUters and asked me to fix some stuff on his website. I can't complain, it was the least boring part of this "date". And free coffee.
tinder.delete();12 -
OK.
1. So i tindered.
2. I got a really nice girl.
3. We chatted really long and good.
4. We tried to meetup it did not work because of our schedule. New
job on my end, she is a student.
5. I thought its over. Fine whatever.
6. She gives me her number.
7. We continue chat on whatsapp
8. Blablabla 3 days long, she gets bored and tries to friendzone me
9. I revert the shit and state i wanna be serious and there wont be a
friendzone/nice guy comin from me.
10. She happy and continues to chat.
11. I get emtionally invested in her.
12. We exchange thoughts dreams and music.
13 We want to meetup at weekend. I cant. Got a family wedding all
weekend.
14. We want to meetup the second week.
I cant. Im off on a company trip. Again new job here.
15. So we say in the week after I get back.
15a. Before the weekend we need to deliver an rc and go all out to hold
the deadline.
15b. We deliver, but shit happens on the customer side. His fault but we
get the blame.
15c I go onto the company trip.
16. We chat and i send her pictures of the trip over the weekend so she
sees I care.
17. She seems fine. And happy.
18. I come back from the trip late night and need to work the next day
jetlag style.
19. I work jetlag style. And try to fix the shit from last week.
20. I come home really tired and looking forward to date day tomorrow.
21. I cant do anything. My home looks like shit and the bag still
unpacked. I just eat and fall asleep.
I feel bad bcs my home will turn her down instantly if we make it to my
place.
Need to hope that it does not come to this.
22. Date day comes. Today.
23. I wake up at 6 early to plan ahead to make sure my clothes are fine
and i arrive on time in the office to exit early.
24. I expect to check what goes on today in the city and give her the
location to meet and time.
25. I enter office and immeadetly get caught up in meeting planning, dev
questions and the meeting itself because the project is on edge.
26. We have a 5hours long meeting where people go on and on and on.
27. 3h later in the meeting:
my brain was fried and around 12 i go to lunch with some people.
28. Meanwhile the city is turning into a rainy mess of a shitty day. No
way I can have a nice walk with her like that. Bars and coffeshops are
just to boring.
29. So i eat to regain some sense and we go back to the office.
Meanwhile I am thinking all kinds of locations and stuff in my head.
30. Havent given her any update since a good morning in the morning.
31. We reenter the meeting. Things continue like before. The project is
on impossible demands and impossible timelines. Still we try to do our
best.
32 3h later on 3pm I tell her i am in a long meeting and working on a
meetingspot.
33. shes not happy.
34. I get a call from a relative
35. i need to go out and take the call. not good for the collegues.
again new job here.
36. family trouble, money trouble, goverment demands. I promise to
handle that tomorrow. Before work.
37. i get back into the meeting.
38. still super slow and no results.
39. need to focus but start to check for locations on my phone.
40. she asks me where i am
41. I send her my location.
42. she thinks i am saying she should pick me up!
43 i joke and say no definitly not.
44. shes pissed.
45. I decide for a coffeeshop. after work. and send her the location
46. She says to call it off.
47. I go all in and go romance style. I say ill wait there even if she
does not come to show her how much i care.
U know to avoid the lets do it some other time fuckery and then it never
happens.
47. She goes quiet.
48. 2h later we finish the meeting. Meanwhile QA foudn a bug we need to
fix because why not.
49. I got 30 minutes to find the bug and fix it before I need to go to
uphold my word.
50. I find out what to do, but it might break a lot of other things
without careful test and implementation. Collegues says he takes it.
51 I feel bad but I need to go. I even leave earlier because otherwise I
would not be on time.
52. I arrive 15 minutes early. I grab two coffee2go and wait outside,
53. Shitty weather, sometimes rain, sometimes sunny, cant decide what it
wants.
54. The weather is just like how I feel.
55. I wait 1 1/2h
56. I think I should feel stupid, For gods sake its tinder. People dont
give a crap, Enough people around why should I Invest so much into this?
But I dont feel stupid. Because this is how I want it. I dont want
appointments, I dont want safety. I decided for her and I went all in.
57. I send her pics from the sceneray as proof that I waited,
58. I think I blew it. She is still quiet.
59. Friends are asking me for plans for the weekend. I wish I could say
I already have some with her.
60. I feel lost right now. But my head says I put too much stress on
her, And i fucked up with the planning. I should have been more precise.
My head also says that i am putting myself into the victim role, which
is wrong always. Should I continue to reach out to her? Is there
something I could do still?68 -
Had a tinder "date" last night. Shit was just awkward the entire time. She lives right over a state border, and I live right on the other side, so it was maybe a 10 minute drive. Plus she had a bunny, so that was pretty cool.
She said she wasn't interested in a hookup or anything, which I was fine with, sex isn't everything. We saw the bunny for a bit, then she started talking about her abusive ex boyfriend she was with for like 2 years (she did not shut the fuck up about it).
She lives in a fairly sketchy place too, so that didn't help the situation. At one point, a car drives by and shined a flashlight through the window I was sitting by. The flashlight was turned off right after that. Then she continued talking about her ex boyfriend.
I held through for 3 hours of that shit. It was the most uncomfortable I have ever been in my life. Eventually she said her friend texted her about having boyfriend issues and invited herself over to stay the night there, so she basically said "you might as well go, I don't think you want to deal with a crying 16 year old"
So I went to my car and left. I drove as fast as I could back to my apartment. Then I was telling my roommate about it, and he was like "I think you need some alcohol after that shit", so I took a couple shots of vodka.
Shit was fucking weird guys.7 -
Facebook just announced a dating mode.
I don't know what to say. Is Zuckerberg that desperate to see how humans date?
https://theverge.com/2018/5/...8 -
LinkedIn for developers is the exact opposite of Tinder for developers:
Tons of young, attractive women send you messages you ignore.6 -
I'm pretty sure I like getting devRant notifications more than tinder ones now. Somethings wrong here 😂2
-
For God sake tinder, fix your fucking algorithm.
Why are you showing my beautiful and out of my league girls. I don't want depression everytime I open tinder.
Please show me avarage looking girls.12 -
*recieves notofication from tinder*
*"somebody likes you. Swipe to find who blah"*
*opens tinder*
*swipes everyone to right*
*no matches*
Fucking clickbait!4 -
Can someone make like a tinder app, only for finding employees/job?
Can we remove HR companies from standing in the middle and making things hard on both sides?!?! Fuuuck
This could be so much easier..swipe..swipe .. There's a match.. scheduled interview.. done14 -
One of classmates presented an idea of children tinder as her final project. (To find friends, not...you know..)
So, after a pretty logical question how they're going to prevent it from turning into a platform for kidnappers, they said 'I don't know, not my problem, tinder doesn't do it, Facebook doesn't, it's not my sphere of responsibility. And as a developer I cannot guarantee anything, why are you asking me this you're wrong'
Bravo.
P.s. idk why both of my latest posts are about tinder lol13 -
It's funny how all the pretty girls on LinkedIn want to have a cup of coffee with me after I updated my profile to match my current position. Previously not even bots on Tinder would chat to me.19
-
Some of my colleagues realised that I have a devRant account. Of course they peeped into my smartphone screen when I was reading some weird stuff on devRant. They went on to install devRant and uninstall it the next day after realising that it is not 'Tinder of Developers' :D
if(devRant != Tinder.developers()) uninstall;
Haha5 -
So recently I started swiping on Tinder again, after some years of staying away from it. Now that's all fine, right?
But there's another dating platform that I used long long ago, Zoosk. I didn't even know that I had an account on it anymore, and they've never reminded me of it either. But guess what got in my mailbox this morning.. 32 singles that you'll definitely like!
Now how does Zoosk know that I'm on dating sites again.. maybe Tinder? 🤔
You know what, Tinder wanketeers? Fuck you. Sharing my personal data like that. Shame on you!!!4 -
My tinder status:
//Recently relocated to Bangalore
looking for friendship();
beauty += brains;
turn_ons = {tech_talks, humour, adventure};
turn_offs = {selfie_addiction, crap_chat, discussing_people};
If (you in turn_ons &! turn_offs)
swipe right();
else
swipe left();2 -
So you are having a conversation about relationships, breakup etc with your friend on WhatsApp.
Then you instantly see a tinder ad on the first YouTube video you play.
Coincidence or something else ? 🤔
(Every one has some similar experiences i, I bet)10 -
My tinder date is playing journey on a ps4 pro 4k tv while i am taking a shit right now.
Needed something for her todo while i do my buisness...3 -
Okay so I’m swiping through tinder for my fellow coding mate and I’m either looking at a porn star or an lg.
Sooooo figures I might as well throw this out here:
Any females? Melbourne Australia??
I’m tired of swiping and I don’t want him to be lonely 😢13 -
Met a girl on tinder
She asked - what do you do?
I said - I'm a programmer
She said -
Sorry I don't date nerds :(8 -
Aus Gov: here's a bright idea, let's enforce social media accounts being verified with enough identification to pull of identify theft with ease for the greater good.
https://news.com.au/technology/...
Facebook: 533 million accounts leaked with names, email, phone, address details.
https://mobile.twitter.com/UnderThe...
Me: 🤦♂️12 -
if I would have got as many right swipes on tinder as likes of devrant I would have ten gfs five wives and lot of kids4
-
My colleague is getting a divorce soon because Tinder thought it's a good idea not to add the "Delete" message button.
His wife is a good friend of mine. Finally a MILF I know.
Thanks Tinder.17 -
Wanna know what being social media famous or being a celebrity feels like?
Be a programmer on LinkedIn.
They’d be hitting on you and you have no other choice but to ignore everyone.2 -
How do you have words like "Senior", "Manager" and "Lead" in your job title and have your linkedin image look like a Tinder profile shot of the last time you went drinking in town?
Omitted a couple that were actually normal.
7 -
There are always guys coming with the same million dollar app idea every few weeks that want me to develop the app for share of the future revenues.
Btw the idea is always like this: "he man, i got an app idea which will make us rich quick. It's like Facebook and Instagram mix but with tinder functionality."
7 -
I would love to create food suggestor based on neural networks.
Something like tinder but you choose food.5 -
Finding a girl on Tinder probably looks like an opposite of Venn diagram... set A consists of girls that don't have weird names(meaning they are not from one of the neighbouring countries or just a tourist in my country) and aren't ugly(I know what they say about not judging a book by its cover but sometimes I don't know if I am looking at a human or a sea monster) and the set B consists of girls that consider me or my "about" text interesting... these sets have no intersection5
-
I was using the app Jobr to apply for random positions. It’s like tinder — only you swipe to send your resume.
A week or so later I got an email from a company locally that wanted to set up an interview. I honestly thought it was a scam! I didn’t even remember applying for the job.
Long story short, they’re mostly desktop developers, and I’m the first front end web guy. I was initially hired to help with UI stuff but on the last project I was developing Service Workers. So I guess I just get invested and give my fullest.
Now myself and one of the other programmers are working on the 3rd gen of our software, built with Vue.js and rest APIs.4 -
It's looks like this weeks "Weekly Group Rant" is trolling all the developers who have side projects that never finished.
1. CMS like WordPress
2. MVC framework like Laravel
3. Android App like Tinder
and... list goes on.
#1, #2 and few others are still stuck on index page.2 -
So one of my employees flew to spain on friday with an Tinder date and forgot to book a flight back on Sunday. He arrived on wednesday.3
-
I tried this on tinder. She was confused and proceeded to un-match me. A !false statement would be to say that I’ve failed at life. 😉
5 -
Tinder Tutorial 101:
I don't understand why everybody has issues with matches. Here is what u do:
1) Open Tinder App
2) Spam-Swipe to the right until you have no more swipes left.
3) Wait for matches
4) Separate good from trash.
Ain't nobody got time to read all these profiles6 -
Can you rant about yourself?
I was reading about the AWS outage, with little to no interest. I didn't know what it was and thus figured it wouldn't affect me.
Some time goes by and I come up with this 300++ vote post. I'm witty, I'm smart, but when I want to upload a photo it doesn't work.
Must be the app right? I restart, nope nothing. Whatever..
Sometime later I have a dashing new photo for tinder. Surely to give me all the matches. Nope, can't upload it.
Must be my phone or Internet then.
Restart everything, nothing is working. Complete madness, no devRant upvotes and I'm still single.
I surrender, give up. Which is one of the worst things to do for me as a dev.
Today. Which is the cherry on the cake. I finally see my connection to the incident. I feel stupid and annoyed by myself.
God dammit Julian, pay attention.
</rant>2 -
I focused on the fact that the time was 14.04 instead of the girl on tinder... That was the time I decided to switch to devRant
-
!dev
Another tinder story from last night.
Matched with a girl, I thought she was cute and all. She texted me first, and we started talking. We kinda just clicked, had similar interests and everything. Conversation turned to musicals, she said she wanted me to come listen to one with her at some point when we were both free. I mentioned the whole story from Sunday night to her (see previous rant), and told her how the girl said I was a "rebound", but nothing actually happened. Then she changed the conversation by saying something like "rebounds normally involve sex, maybe I can make up for it".
After that the conversation got sexual. Dirty talk, nudes, everything. Talking about how hard she wanted me to fuck her and everything. That carried on until about 6 in the morning. We both decided we should go to sleep.
I woke up around 11, we talked for a few minutes, then she said she had to get ready for a doctor appointment, and I didn't think anything of it. Went to work at 2, had to go get a car from a dealership like 20 minutes away. Me and my coworker got back, I decided to check my phone and see if she messaged me or anything.
Come to find out, she basically just fucking ghosted me. Blocked me, unmatched me on tinder, the whole nine yards. No warning, nothing. 8 hours earlier she was saying how much she wanted me inside her (not paraphrasing), and now she just decided "nah fuck him altogether".
I don't fucking know what it is. It's been about 10 hours since I found out, and I just..I don't know. She could have just said "nah I don't wanna fuck" and I would have been 100% fine with that. But nope. No warning, just blocked me.
I'm not mad that she just backed out of it, I'm mad that she didn't say fucking anything about it. Like, even apart from all the sexting and stuff, I genuinely liked this girl. She was nice, cute, funny, just everything I could have asked for. And now, I'm honestly kinda sad about it. Everything seemed like it was going well (maybe all the sexting would have been better for another time in the future ya know, but I can honestly say I didn't initiate it), and now I have nothing again.17 -
Describing a friend's project to a friend:
"And then theirs a tinder like element, for filtering potential dates, but that's not implemented yet."
"Why doesn't he just copy tinder?"
"Er... wat?"
"You know, just copy their code and put it in his app."
"You don't... you can't... I mean you can decompile... but that's not useful because... it just doesn't work that way. For a million reasons. I don't know where to begin."3 -
Just want to put it out here... reading this will waste ur time. :(
Having a serious crush on co-worker. I tried not to have a crush on him initially because he’s a colleague and he seems to be much older(max 10 yrs I guess). Age isn’t an issue but ppl say it’s not good to like someone from work.
But then he kept on glancing at me and caught him turning back to look into my cubicle at several occasions. Saw him looking at my direction across the room, hall, turning back to look when he was waiting at lobby, and all the way from smoking corner as well. Could be possible that he just happened to be looking in my direction several times.
Now, haven’t seen him since early feb because of the quarantine. Luckily, I chanced upon his number when everyone in the dept was put into the same chat channel for the Covid19 news. I had this urge to ask what was it all about because we’ve been told to wfh till further notice. Who knows what could happen to us during these period.
So tried to be brave and asked abt why he was looking into my cubicles several times, without coming out weird (I hope). His reply was “dont know”. I don’t know what to make of it. Could have been anything else but how could someone just reply don’t know.
Then came yesterday, my friend was telling me about her experience on tinder. Apparently she’s been using it for fun and she got funny texts from the guys there. So I decided to give it a try. Man, it was so fun swiping left all the way (cuz they couldnt be compared with work crush) till I swiped right for this older guy. We matched!
He was the first one to match, probably abt 5-10mins after I’ve finished setting up profile and all that. It was totally a new experience for me. I forgot abt my work crush in that moment. He had this minimalistic vibe. Didn’t smile much in his photos, gave me calm feeling and looked so cool. He put “Everything is good in moderation” in the bio. He’s the only one comparable for that work crush. Not sure who’s supposed to start saying hi. My friends said wait for the guy, so I waited.
Got a few other matches after him but didn’t like them as much as him. I finally decided to say hi. No respond till today. Given that he put Doctor for his occupation, I assumed he’d be busy. So I waited. Then sent another in late afternoon asking if he plays LoL often (he’s wearing LoL land yard in one of the photos). No reply.
I started to feel weird because this is supposed to be light and fun because who takes things seriously on tinder, right. They’re there to flirt and kill the boredom especially because of the lockdown. And I started to have serious feelings for this one guy whom didn’t even bother to reply. So decided to delete tinder for good. Sent him one final msg that I really wanted to get to know him and I thought he’s a really cool handsome dude. But now that I’ve deleted my acc, he wouldn’t even see my msg anymore.
His profile name is Randolf. I want to get to know him in real life. But is it illegal? :(
Thank u for read this far. I just didn’t know where to put all those feelings. And sorry for wasting your time with nonsense.17 -
!devrant.
More like 'relationship' rant.
The following is gonna be kinda crude and not work appropriate just fyi.
First, whats with this trend of 'shave your pussy", and small tits? Shit just a few years ago it was the opposite! Who wants to fuck a women who looks like an undeveloped boy. Give me a good medium pair of knockers and a (slightly) hairy pussy anyday and I'm in heaven.
On that note, all these guys whining and fucking whinging about "fat" women. Like I'm not chasing deathfat women or anything, but come on dudes. If you're gonna demand 'thin beautiful women' put in the fucking work! Just saying it now. Kinda pudgy, not a deal breaker for me. She have a pretty face, looks good in make up? Fuck it, I'll give her the time of day. Don't come at me with "hurrr...fat is unhealthy! Wheres your standards?"
Wheres YOUR fucking standards? Shit, I could take a 'heavy' girl and in a few months time have her trim. Its about the WORK you put in. All these fucking guys, all these fucking guys man, they all want something for nothing and chicks for free. No one wants to put in the fucking EFFORT anymore. I can't name on one hand the number of 'fat ugly chicks' everyone ignored from school (well except for me), who are now bombshells. If I stayed connected with people maybe I'd be with one of em right now, but I just get tired of this attitude that no one invests any time in others any more. It's all about 'me me me'.
Shes fat, maybe only a few extra pounds? Fat and 'not beautiful'? Fucking DO THE WORK and make her beautiful you bitch! Be her coach, like those fucking instagram couples you see sweating it out. Make her sexy. Become sexy, together.
Get her a fucking treadmill. Get her two. And jog together. Make her *feel* sexy.
More importantly get to *know* her. Why does she get out of bed in the morning? What drive her NOT to get out of bed? When does she feel lousy? What makes her feel that way? In addition to all the other shit men should know how to do, you should learn to play doctor phil, because every girl needs one. Women bond by talking, men bond by doing things together. Relationships should involve both.
Jesus fucking christ, this is basic bitch advice, and it annoys me I keep on coming across these spergs that don't fucking get it. Women are not cars you can stick your key in and just go 'vroom'.
They require maintenance, same as anything, any 'relationship' (because really, what are relationships in 2020, with instagram and fucking tinder and antisocial distancing?). You're a *team*, and i don't mean that in an inspirational way. You're a literal team. And far too many people prioritize the well being and success and concern of 'I' over' 'us'.
In short, if she ain't coming, you shouldn't be either. And if you expect her to on-the-regular put sharp objects on her fucking nether regions, don't expect any blowjobs unless you're doing the same thing for yourself!
Ideally you should be doing it to each other.
After all, you're partners. You trust her to put sharp objects near your groin, right?
Aren't relationships supposed to be about mutual trust?28 -
App idea: A tinder-esque service for developers, where devs woo their counterparts with intelligence.4
-
A friend is currently building a 'dating and matching' open source app for developers. Let's say Tinder for developers.
Don't know how it works but I think it'll make sense.7 -
vsinder (VScode tinder) is more of like a GitHub tinder. Nobody looks at the code. all are interested in your GitHub profile picture.3
-
Height of making fake profile.
Few days back, I got connection request from Mark Zuckerberg. When I check profile it was having 23 connections !
I think it was okay till you make fake profile on Tinder but making fake profile on LinkedIn ???
Share your experiences below ...
4 -
anyone who says women gossip don't pay enough attention to guys, specially when they talk about women. what is it to me that you don't think x girl dresses well or that this aspect of her is unattractive? we're at work, it's not tinder39
-
I have quite a few interesting stories from my romantic but also technical foray into dating applications.
There was a lad who was quite attractive that I encountered on Tinder. And I thought he seemed familiar. Turns out he worked at a start-up I had visited a year earlier.
Although at the time I was looking for romance, all I could think about was discussing the pros and cons of dating websites and building at least one that functioned well. To be fair, so was he, however he just wanted a Wham Bam thank you ma'am (which I didn't). Ghosted me without even a tech hangout.
It's so hard when you encounter cool tech folks you want to befriend and pick their brain but you met them on a dating site.6 -
Pocket instant sharing on Android "I found a girl for you on Tinder" to your crush on Valentine's day. I hate Android's share drawers.1
-
LinkedIn: Exploiting social psychology for fun and profit.
I was reading an excellent post by Kage about linkedin (you can find it and more here - https://devrant.com/users/Kage) a little while ago and it occurred to me the unique historic moment we are in. Never before have we been so connected in history. Never before have we had so great an opportunity to communicate with strangers (perhaps except for sketchy candy vans on college campuses, and tie dye wearing guys distributing slips of paper at concerts). And yet today, we are more atomized than ever before. In this unprecedented era of free information, and free communication, how can we make the most of our opportunities?
The great thing about linkedin is all the fawning morons who self select for it. They're on it. They're active, so you know they're either desperate attention hungry cock goblins,
self aggrandizing dicknosed cretins, desperate yeasty little strumpets, or a managerie of other forgetable fucking pawns,
willingly posting up their entire lives to be harvested and sold so someone can make 15 cents on a 2% higher ad conversion ratio for fucking cilas or beetus meds.
So what is a psychopathic autist asshole to do?
Ruthlessly exploit them by feeding them upvotes, hows-it-going-guys, and other little jolts of virtualized feel-good-chemical bullshit.
Remember the quickest way to network is for people to like you. And the quickest way to make people like you is either agree with them on everything, or be absolutely upfront with everything you disagree on.
Well, they'll love you, or hate you. But at least you'll be living rent free in their head. And that means they'll remember you when you call looking to network or get a referal.
Of course, in principle, this extends to any social media site. Why not facebook? Why not fucking *myspace*? Why not write a script in selenium to browse twitter all day, liking pictures of lattes and dogs posted by the lonely and social-approval-hungry devs working at places like google, twitter, faceborg, etc?
You could even extend this to non-job prospects. Want a quick fuck? Why, just script a swipe-right hack on tinder, or attach a big motherfucking robot arm to your phone, tapping and swiping for hours. Want to make a buck? Want not harvest data on ebay or amazon all god damn day and then run arbitration for 'wanted' classifieds on craiglist?
Why not automate all the things?
The world is at your fingertips, and you the power to automate it, while all the wall lickers and finger painters live oblivious to the opportunity they are surrounded with and blessed with daily.
Surely now that you know, it is your obligation, nay, your DUTY to show the way.
Now you are learned. Now you are prepared. Go forth and stroke the egos of disposable morons to bilk for future social favors while automating the world in ways never intended.3 -
was just setting up a tinder profile. couldn't think of a non-boring version of "software engineer" to use as the job title.7
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I'd like to create an imageboard app with React-Native and got a few questions.
Every user has to like or dislike the shown content to advance to the next image/video (tinder style). I want to use that data to feed a machine learning algorithm and generate an unique selection of displayed media for each user with that.
Even though I never used it yet before (I'm still learning to code) I want to use python and a python machine learning library for that.
Can you give me any advice for the python part? For example which library to use, where to start, etc. .
Do you think that might be an interesting idea to realize? :)2 -
I am lucky enough to work in a place where my coworkers are awesome and spending time with them is a blast.
Otherwise I reserve one day of the week for tinder dates, two for myself, two for tabletop rpg and two for my partner.1 -
So. My new machine at work has decided that running visual studio is too hard and our build script has decided that building vcxproj files is too hard. And our one sysadmin for our team of 100+ is the only one allowed to fix it.
Luckily I have an old box that *only* takes 45 minutes to run our build, a hangover, apparently I am going through early manopause because it is hot as fuck in this office, and today is the day that everyone wants to loudly ask every question ever.
I guess what I am saying is I blame everyone else for my bad decisions and project them into my you-me instead of focusing on my me-me. Also I really don't want to talk to the S.A. He is difficult. -
The people who run these scheduling meetings need to remember that this building is just one big tinder box ready to go up in smoke. 30+ minutes talking about bull shit that only affects a small percentage of the team. AND we're behind and dealing with a push that happened on a Friday before the guy who wrote the code left for vacation to go to Tennessee to watch the eclipse for some reason.
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I am thinking of creating an algorithm which filters out those Snapchat hoes who use dogfilter pictures on tinder.5
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PROTIP: If you go outdoors for recreation and you happen to be hiking in dry country where there is obviously a lot of potential tinder around you, don't be a dumbass and light off fireworks.
The lingering smell of burning is not conducive to creating software.
With the AQI north of 170, the building's HVAC can't keep up.1 -
I met a girl through Tinder. During the first date we talked abour our jobs. When you talk with passion about what you love there is not way to the other person to get interested.
#dev is the new #sexy3 -
Y'know, there are some things that are timeless. Like bug severity arguments. We don't have a "likeliness of occurrence" parameter in the bug database. We just have "severity if it occurs". You have to classify it as such. The bug database IS NOT FOR RISK MITIGATION ACTIVITIES IT'S FOR FIXING THE FUCKING SOFTWARE!!! STOP MAKING THESE DAMN MEETINGS TAKE 30 YEARS BY QUESTIONING THE SYSTEM THAT WAS ESTABLISHED IN THE BEFORE TIMES BY PEOPLE WHO ARE ABOVE YOUR PAY GRADE!!! TINDER BOX!!! MATCH!!! GODS DAMMIT!!!
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There was a department. Long time ago their work was somewhat complicated: background checks of businesses, websites, ToSes, assuring agreement compliance, some risk management on top. They started as small 3 people team but over the years they were hiring new employees to catch up with the growing customer base. They were still struggling. Few years back we've integrated 3rd party services to help them and, finally, their backlog was gone!
In January they complained about how much more work they have since the merger so I inquired about which process was troublesome, what was the flow, etc., and it turned out to be very... Tinder-like - the issue was the sheer number of cases:
1. open a case,
2. check results in few windows,
3. if green + green + green, move right.
4. else move left.
It was ridiculous, I wouldn't stand for that. I sat for an hour, made some ghosting scripts that followed same business logic and saved results alongside their actual decisions. Last week I compared the two and there was zero difference so I green-lit it with my boss and pushed to prod.
Oh, the happiness on their faces when they heard the news, the disbelief, the tears of joy!
And then it happened. After 4 years of being cautious not to stir the waters I did it again. Yesterday I accidentally replaced 17 people department with 3 scripts. How was I supposed to know it was *all* they were doing??1 -
What infrastructurial fuck / poor design happened that Tinder does not allow changing the profile nickname? Did some enlightened celestial cunt thought of using the nick as a primary key or what the fuck?3
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Is there something like tinder that doesn't require a photo?
I just don't like my own face right now. That's all.28 -
* Automated Technical and Fundamental Expert Advisor trading in MT4 with Python dealing with RSS News Feed on the Financial Calendar
* Food decision/recommender/randomizer app
* Food decision/recommender/randomizer bot
* Personal Companion set up on Raspberry Pi with Jasper AI, buy BrickPi and Lego Mindstorm to make it a friendly moving robot
* Cardboard fort for my kid
* A 3D game that involves hacking with drama storyline (inspired from Mr. Robot) and publish it on Steam
* A SaaS app like Tinder that matches would-be Project Managers with Devs to push Devs to finish side projects that we have and push Project Managers to use whatever PM techniques and methodology (Six Sigma perhaps)
And so much more... Ughh. -
Any apps you think could be better... Like tinder messenger I think is terrible... I mean it takes 5-6 hours to build a better chat system then that...
What are they doing.
Ho the extra mile1 -
Do apps behave and perform differently on iOs?
Ofc they do from a code perspective, but I'm taking about outcomes and real-life utility.
For example, does a Uber driver get more rides with in iPhone?
Does an iPhone user get more matches on Tinder?
Cheers2 -
Some people think building a clone of tinder takes a weekend. Good luck with that dumpster fire of an app5
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I have two potential offers. A is too good (pay, hours, stability, perks). B is decent (good pay but not so stable, no idea on perks but the work seems cool). Despite better work I'm not inclined to go for B. It is from my previous interview experience rant. People seem shitty, or at least as bad as the ones I'm leaving.
I don't wanna accept A either because they are expecting a longer stay and right now I'm in a state where I don't want to commit more than 6-7 months to anything. 😞
But I don't have any other offers and there aren't any short term projects coming up in my search.
Ugh.11 -
I need an open source library /package or any addons to implement the given functionality. Its consist of tinder like swiping for clicks. Sadly i coudlnt get any. I thought about angular animations. But didnt implement any. Each card has each questions for clients. Let me know your findings
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