So, someone submitted a 'bug' to Mozilla.

As some of you may know, in the next year, the new mass surveillance law in the Netherlands is going into effect.

Another fun fact is that the dutch security agencies/government have their own CA (Certificate Authority) for SSL/TLS certificates.

The new law says that the AIVD (dutch NSA/GCHQ equivilant) is allowed to hack into systems through obtained certificates and also that they're allowed to INTERCEPT TRAFFIC THROUGH OBTAINED PRIVATE SSL/TLS KEYS.

So someone actually had the fucking balls to submit a fucking issue to Mozilla saying that the Dutch State certs shouldn't be accepted anymore when the new mass surveillance law gets into place.

This person deservers a fucking medal if you ask me.

So I have complained to our landlord about a noisy neighbor who keeps blasting shitty music at midnight, and technically its against the law as well, but this bitch ass joke of a human being ignored even the most highest of authority.

Seeing I can't solve it with democracy, I finally gave up with any reasonable type of way to restrain this motherfucker (even calling police didn't help) and went full asshole with him

I know his WiFi uses WPS PIN, but I'm not gonna throttle his network, I want to piss him off so much he'll regret living beside me, or at our place entirely.

So I performed a Evil Twin attack, I had my Raspberry Pi act as a both cloned AP and a deauther. Finally the plan came to effect.

I ran the deauther in his AP, effectively disconnecting his devices, and had the devices connect to the cloned network. The primary aim of my attack is to annoy this bitch ass to the point of no return. The project I used serves a website on the cloned AP like a update for his router. I intentionally made it run overnight, blasted Lo-fi hip hop and went to sleep. Before I dozed off, I can hear their scream of rage because they can't blast their music at full volume (waddaya guess, they use Spotify).

I finally woke up the next day, and I find neighbor complaining about me, and they were trying to tell the landlord I was hacking them. It's technically true but its not as bad as domestic disturbance for a full fucking week.

Landlord asked me if I did it, I declined, she believed me (I know she does because she knows I'm a pure soul unlike this mofo). Then he left frustrated, threatened to sue me for hacking.

I just smickered, he can't really prove anything unless I was being sloppy.

Nowadays I get good sleep and finally we live in a quite peaceful place now. Now you may ask, what happened to that guy? After he threatened me, the next night he found his things outside his own room, he was kicked out by the landlord.

Moral of the story: we ain't hating on your music taste but don't showcase it like its the most important thing in the world when everyone is sleeping. Case and point, don't be an asshole

I absolutely HATE "web developers" who call you in to fix their FooBar'd mess, yet can't stop themselves from dictating what you should and shouldn't do, especially when they have no idea what they're doing.

So I get called in to a job improving the performance of a Magento site (and let's just say I have no love for Magento for a number of reasons) because this "developer" enabled Redis and expected everything to be lightning fast. Maybe he thought "Redis" was the name of a magical sorcerer living in the server. A master conjurer capable of weaving mystical time-altering spells to inexplicably improve the performance. Who knows?

This guy claims he spent "months" trying to figure out why the website couldn't load faster than 7 seconds at best, and his employer is demanding a resolution so he stops losing conversions. I usually try to avoid Magento because of all the headaches that come with it, but I figured "sure, why not?" I mean, he built the website less than a year ago, so how bad can it really be? Well...let's see how fast you all can facepalm:

1.) The website was built brand new on Magento 1.9.2.4...what? I mean, if this were built a few years back, that would be a different story, but building a fresh Magento website in 2017 in 1.x? I asked him why he did that...his answer absolutely floored me: "because PHP 5.5 was the best choice at the time for speed and performance..." What?!

2.) The ONLY optimization done on the website was Redis cache being enabled. No merged CSS/JS, no use of a CDN, no image optimization, no gzip, no expires rules. Just Redis...

3.) Now to say the website was poorly coded was an understatement. This wasn't the worst coding I've seen, but it was far from acceptable. There was no organization whatsoever. Templates and skin assets are being called from across 12 different locations on the server, making tracking down and finding a snippet to fix downright annoying.

But not only that, the home page itself had 83 custom database queries to load the products on the page. He said this was so he could load products from several different categories and custom tables to show on the page. I asked him why he didn't just call a few join queries, and he had no idea what I was talking about.

4.) Almost every image on the website was a .PNG file, 2000x2000 px and lossless. The home page alone was 22MB just from images.

There were several other issues, but those 4 should be enough to paint a good picture. The client wanted this all done in a week for less than $500. We laughed. But we agreed on the price only because of a long relationship and because they have some referrals they got us in the door with. But we told them it would get done on our time, not theirs. So I copied the website to our server as a test bed and got to work.

After numerous hours of bug fixes, recoding queries, disabling Redis and opting for higher innodb cache (more on that later), image optimization, js/css/html combining, render-unblocking and minification, lazyloading images tweaking Magento to work with PHP7, installing OpCache and setting up basic htaccess optimizations, we smash the loading time down to 1.2 seconds total, and most of that time was for external JavaScript plugins deemed "necessary". Time to First Byte went from a staggering 2.2 seconds to about 45ms. Needless to say, we kicked its ass.

So I show their developer the changes and he's stunned. He says he'll tell the hosting provider create a new server set up to migrate the optimized site over and cut over to, because taking the live website down for maintenance for even an hour or two in the middle of the night is "unacceptable".

So trying to be cool about it, I tell him I'd be happy to configure the server to the exact specifications needed. He says "we can't do that". I look at him confused. "What do you mean we 'can't'?" He tells me that even though this is a dedicated server, the provider doesn't allow any access other than a jailed shell account and cPanel access. What?! This is a company averaging 3 million+ per year in revenue. Why don't they have an IT manager overseeing everything? Apparently for them, they're too cheap for that, so they went with a "managed dedicated server", "managed" apparently meaning "you only get to use it like a shared host".

So after countless phone calls arguing with the hosting provider, they agree to make our changes. Then the client's developer starts getting nasty out of nowhere. He says my optimizations are not acceptable because I'm not using Redis cache, and now the client is threatening to walk away without paying us.

So I guess the overall message from this rant is not so much about the situation, but the developer and countless others like him that are clueless, but try to speak from a position of authority.

If we as developers don't stop challenging each other in a measuring contest and learn to let go when we need help, we can get a lot more done and prevent losing clients. </rant>

Mother of god, as if the new mass surveillance law in the Netherlands wasn't bad enough, one of the politicians who likes the new law has come up with an even more redicilous idea.

an 'Internet Authority. To put it short, an authority which surveils the internet in real time and sees where all social media shit is coming from/going.

Meaning that it wouldn't just be 'targeted mass surveillance' sometimes but fulltime online monitoring.

This guy has lost his fucking mind.

haha probably this was an idea from musk xD new tesla slogan "fuck authority"

Named my dog sudo, so that i can call or command him with authority. Sudo sit! Sudo eat! Sudo roll over! Isn’t it cool?

The craziest shit in my life just happened.

I left my laptop(basically my whole life) and my handbag at my dinner table and went to the the toilet for 4 minutes. I live in a ground-house in a rural area, and the front door wasn't locked.

After I exited the bathroom I noticed eevrything was gone. My laptop, my bags, my wallet. Everything. I panicked.

I quickly informed the local security authority while canceling my credit card and resetting all of my credentials, they with the help of the police they tracked the theives in 10 minutes in a neighboring town, with what it seems all of my stuff intact, which I am supposed to get tommorow.

This is both insane and a miracle. I am speechless and thankful to G-d. This is divine providence. I can't explain it in any other explanation

Watch over your stuff like your life depends on them. Don't ever leave your laptop even for a few minutes.

After giving them a 30min talk about the importance of proper commit hygiene and the dos and donts of git, I proceed to commit changes of different nature in 4 files as a single commit named "did stuff".

I lost all authority on the subject forever.

After four years of debate, the Telecom Authority of India decided that net neutrality will be the official policy of indian telecom. Any form of discrimination or interference in treatment or content like blocking, slowing down or preferential speed is restricted.

Guess they pulled their head outta their arses on this one.

I joined a company 6 months ago.
No CTO.
No development process.
Spagetti code.
Takes loads of new requirements on top.

Later
I advised the software head and managing director on how to improve our software development process.
New tools
Less requirement good quality software
New products and micro services.

Both of them agreed but they said they are waiting for new CTO to confim as an authority and responsibility.

Well I cant do much just to do my work.

1 month ago new CTO joined
Revised whatever I advised and implementing it right. I like it.

Got my confirmation after 6 months instead of 3 months.

CTO called me in for review and gave me 2/5. And said you need to improve more.

I asked him, in what do I need to improve.
He replies in technologies and development process.
And he takes credit for all changes and implementation.

I argued about it. I already suggested what you did but was ignore because we didnt have CTO.
Hes like ignored me.
Fucking you CTO.

"I need these permissions that J has"

J has those permissions because he worked on a different team that was granted those, you do not.

"I need it"

No

"I need it"

Its not within my power to allow you access, you have to talk with R and M.

"Okay well guess what I'm gonna escalate this up thr chain and its gonna come down on you"

*sigh* what do i do when i literally have no authority to give someone something and am clearly doing my jobb right, but someone thinks they can get me... idk... in trouble? Threaten me??? Logic, meet the window

Story Time. Inspired by another rant.

Context: I'm In a coding camp years ago, it's the first day.

We're doing introductions (name, why you're here, etc). Always fun to do that....

The folks running the camp are excited to introduce a student who also at one point was a teacher for some sort of girl power coding organization. So this raises questions, why would someone who teaches be a student in this camp?? And even a bigger question is raised when this person introduces themselves for a long time, and as an aside puts down the girls she taught in this program they taught ... like who does that?

horribleLady does that ...

A few hours later horribleLady asks her 12th question of the day (we haven't even started talking about code). Before she asks her question actually says:

“I know, I’m going to be a problem.” -laugh-

🚨🚨🚨 ヽ ( ꒪д꒪ )ﾉ 🚨🚨🚨

Fast forward to group projects and she's this sort of emotional storm, tears, and a sort of angry shouting that isn't angry enough for some folks to say she's yelling at people ... but she is. Fortunately I'm not in the first group project with her, but because we're all working in the same room we all get to see the train-wreck unfold.

The moment she doesn't get something (all the time) everyone in her group has to STOP and figure out what they're going to do about it, then again STOP because she thinks someone is doing something different than what was planned. STOP STOP STOP STOP STOP.

In a way, everything had to go through her, she didn’t declare it that way, she didn't present herself as any sort of authority, she would just stop everyone the moment she thought anything was wrong, or she didn't understand it (all the time), and either inject herself or demand help from her team. Everyone around her had to be drawn into whatever problem she had. It was horrific to watch.

Private slack channels would light up like crazy with "OMG", "WTF", "I DON'T UNDERSTAND HER", "FUCK" and "SHE"S HOW OLD!?!?"

So finally it happens to me and guyWhoDoesPotConstantly (capable guy, nice dude, pretty sure he was high all the time).... we're teamed up to work with horribleLady. Thankfully for just one day. I accept this because I figure one day with her is enough penance to try to avoid any further contact later on.

My approach is straight stone face. I refuse to respond to her sulking, or sighing, or general emotional bait she throws out constantly. I saw other students unwittingly take her bait (they were trying to be helpful) only to have her crap all over them with her frustrations or whatever it is is going on.

Still we're teamed up with her her for the day so I'm going to be a good team member and I explain what guyWhoDoesPotConstantly and I are doing / trying.... and so forth. But she's just too upset that she's even assigned to work with us, and tells me I'm just not doing it right, and her explanations about how we're not doing it right makes less than 0 sense. I ask her to show me what she means but she won't type anything on her keyboard, she'd just talk about how she’s thinking conceptually in circles and sulk about it rather than listen. I don't respond to any of her shit and say "I'm going to try this." and guyWhoDoesPotConstantly and I just keep working.

She would later call the instructor over and complain to him for a while and say: "These guys just get it, they're not helping me, I want to be assigned to another group." She doesn't get her way so she just moves to another table in front of us.

After that day I figured it was a great time to ask .... to NEVER be assigned to anything with her because "If I told her what I thought it would just get a lot worse." I got my way ;)

Other students weren't so lucky. Tears, sulking, her special way of yelling at people that somehow never got her in trouble (she should have been kicked out of the program) just kept going on. She refused to even present one group project she deemed not good enough despite the fact that she contributed nothing functional to the project that the TA's didn't write for her...

Amidst the stories she would tell to students was one of how she sued her totally sexist/racist/evil former employer. She never said what came of it, but that combined with her inability to do things reminded me of a rant I read on here.

I sometimes fear being hired someplace and walking in my first day to find I'm assigned to work with .... horribleLady. In this scenario she managed to get hired and they're too afraid to fire her so they assign the new guy to work with horribleLady...

I've no idea what happened to her after the camp.

(I rewrote this rant a few times because it kept circling back to a larger story about the coding camp I wrote about a few years ago, so if this seemed sort of broken up and wonky, yeah it was / is / yeah)

Our web department was deploying a fairly large sales campaign (equivalent to a ‘Black Friday’ for us), and the day before, at 4:00PM, one of the devs emails us and asks “Hey, just a heads up, the main sales page takes almost 30 seconds to load. Any chance you could find out why? Thanks!”
We click the URL they sent, and sure enough, 30 seconds on the dot.
Our department manager almost fell out of his chair (a few ‘F’ bombs were thrown).
DBAs sit next door, so he shouts…
Mgr: ”Hey, did you know the new sales page is taking 30 seconds to open!?”
DBA: “Yea, but it’s not the database. Are you just now hearing about this? They have had performance problems for over week now. Our traces show it’s something on their end.”
Mgr: “-bleep- no!”
Mgr tries to get a hold of anyone …no one is answering the phone..so he leaves to find someone…anyone with authority.
4:15 he comes back..
Mgr: “-beep- All the web managers were in a meeting. I had to interrupt and ask if they knew about the performance problem.”
Me: “Oh crap. I assume they didn’t know or they wouldn’t be in a meeting.”
Mgr: “-bleep- no! No one knew. Apparently the only ones who knew were the 3 developers and the DBA!”
Me: “Uh…what exactly do they want us to do?”
Mgr: “The –bleep- if I know!”
Me: “Are there any load tests we could use for the staging servers? Maybe it’s only the developer servers.”
DBA: “No, just those 3 developers testing. They could reproduce the slowness on staging, so no need for the load tests.”
Mgr: “Oh my –bleep-ing God!”
4:30 ..one of the vice presidents comes into our area…
VP: “So, do we know what the problem is? John tells me you guys are fixing the problem.”
Mgr: “No, we just heard about the problem half hour ago. DBAs said the database side is fine and the traces look like the bottleneck is on web side of things.”
VP: “Hmm, no, John said the problem is the caching. Aren’t you responsible for that?”
Mgr: “Uh…um…yea, but I don’t think anyone knows what the problem is yet.”
VP: “Well, get the caching problem fixed as soon as possible. Our sales numbers this year hinge on the deployment tomorrow.”
- VP leaves -
Me: “I looked at the cache, it’s fine. Their traffic is barely a blip. How much do you want to bet they have a bug or a mistyped url in their javascript? A consistent 30 second load time is suspiciously indicative of a timeout somewhere.”
Mgr: “I was thinking the same thing. I’ll have networking run a trace.”

4:45 Networking run their trace, and sure enough, there was some relative path of ‘something’ pointing to a local resource not on development, it was waiting/timing out after 30 seconds. Fixed the path and page loaded instantaneously. Network admin walks over..
NetworkAdmin: “We had no idea they were having problems. If they told us last week, we could have identified the issue. Did anyone else think 30 second load time was a bit suspicious?”
4:50 VP walks in (“John” is the web team manager)..
VP: “John said the caching issue is fixed. Great job everyone.”
Mgr: “It wasn’t the caching, it was a mistyped resource or something in a javascript file.”
VP: “But the caching is fixed? Right? John said it was caching. Anyway, great job everyone. We’re going to have a great day tomorrow!”
VP leaves
NetworkAdmin: “Ouch…you feel that?”
Me: “Feel what?”
NetworkAdmin: “That bus John just threw us under.”
Mgr: “Yea, but I think John just saved 3 jobs. Remember that.”

People might soon confuse bytes with bytes

This happened a while back but thought it would be an interesting story.

So there is this guy, I'll call him Jack. Jack was a weirdo. He just graduated high school but thought of himself as very hot in terms of dev skills. He boasted lots of good programs, that are the best in industry, except they don't work (like the best proven file compressor, that just can't decompress anything because of some "bugs"). He also entered language holy wars quite actively, saying that Delphi is the best platform ever.

Aaanyway, a couple of years pass. Jack is now a student. Jack tries to make some money, so he talks to some guy, that offers him a "job" at the tax office, where he has to modernize the data infrastructure of the tax authorities. If you think this sounds very wrong, then you're 100% correct. But it gets better. After 2 months of work, the guy manages to do that. It's a simple CRUD application after all.

So everything works, but the guy who gave him this job refused to pay. He stalled and then just stopped answering the phone. Jack is now furious. So what he does, is publish the databases online, so everyone could see the income of every citizen. Authorities are in panic. They send the police to his door. They seize his computer and lock him up for a few days.

To sum it all up: Jack took up a job, without any contract, without any NDA, which is completely illegal in of itself, but he did that with the tax authority. And delivered the product before getting paid. And when he understood that he was owned, he published all online. He got bit back. The guy who gave him this job had no consequences for illegally hiring someone and not paying for their work.

Lesson: Don't be Jack

I finished two projects. Both of them need to connect to each other. However, the tool to do that is not currently licensed to achieve my desired outcome. I email my boss to check the status of the license key I need, that they promised, and the only thing I get back is "Correct." Seriously? 😠 The person who has the company credit card and authority to buy, also the same one that gives me a deadline to turn this shit in, can't give me the time of day to respond to an email? Their response wasn't even relevant. I've been trying to move beyond this roadblock for a week now! I'm a pretty independent guy, but I'm not going to buy the license myself for a tool that I didn't even want to use. So when someone comes to my cube and I'm raging on Steam, ✋ I don't want to hear anything about company time, because mine isn't being respected either. 👊👊

The sales and business team at my office really look down at the devs. Just because we don't dress in fancy suits doesn't mean we are any less important that those asshats.

In fact we are probably a hell of a lot more useful since they cant land any sales since they barely have any idea what they are selling and the company is rapidly going under.
To give you an idea :
We recently changed office and one of them asked if they had had to be in the same workspace as the developers again?

Why do we need them?
Cant we outsource their jobs ?

Some of them dont even answer when you bid them good morning

And one douche bag even brought his bluetooth radio and refuses to use headphones , he keeps playing shitty music and disturbing us.

The company is kinda fractured and there is poor chain of command, so there is little we can do, telling dev management is fruitless he has no authority over the guy
And the business manager simply said oh you dont like good music then walked off.

{
Dear whoever made devrantron available on the AUR: BLESS YOU. MAY UNDERSTANDING CLIENTS AND JUNIORS WHO RESPECT AUTHORITY COME YOUR WAY.
};
( with kde's app-loading cursor animation, the devrant stressball bounces and i think that's absolutely fantastic )

Helpful tip to all you freelancers or those with the authority:

Never let a client dictate anything in how you do your job, no matter how simple.

Even if they ask you to make yourself available at a specific time, don't. Instead, tell them times you have available so they have to work with you.

If you give a client an inch, they will always take a mile.

Meeting with CEO went well I heard. Only thing he didn’t like that there was no permission level “worthy of leadership” (GUI options are view-only/worker/admin/super).

Keeping the existence of the the secret “god” permission to myself I proceeded to create the “executive authority” permission, which is an alias…

…for view-only. 🖕😘🖕

Take the know-it-all guy you grew up with, that ruins every relationship he's ever had with friends and family, because he gets angry when folks don't deem him as the authority, even for shit he doesn't have a single clue about doing correctly.

Now make him the manager of a fast-food restaurant - so he can command anyone he pleases, making them do anything he wants them to, because he feels it's fun to experiment with co-workers emotions.

Give him an assistant manager that realizes that the only way they can keep their job is to kiss his ass, blowing him every once in a while for a ten cent raise, while the rest of the employees do nothing but smile, say "yes, sir", and go about their business - eventually shit talking about him at the parties he's not invited to.

Watch him jump on every fashion trend, no matter how much it costs, until he eventually decides that the job he's had for the last decade and his fellow employees are beneath him, without saving any money to pay for the things he needs to survive, or taking the proper time to learn all the things that would have made him successful in the long run.

Even though he was an uptight twat and a half, some folks feel that he never got the chance he deserved, as death comes knocking at an earlier age than many would have expected; creating an empty, irrational, and partial dependency in their lives, caused by problems he never cared to correct for their love and admiration, while others are happy as fuck that he's breathed his last breath.

This is the state of our current industry.

*Drops the mic*

!dev

my boss is apparently upset that i don't turn his way when he enters the room, something about hierarchy and respecting authority. while that's a petty bs thing to be upset about, I'm not very good with social cues and conflicts with authority figures trigger me due to past events.

I can't help wonder if this demand for a show of respect is gender biased. it hasn't escaped me that all the people he has an issue with are women and he has a history of chasing his female workers away.

idk, i just don't want to do this shit again. it would really help to have a female perspective on this.

Create an web application(a product of our company). Manager insisted on using X third party API instead of Y third party API.

Now the app is complete.
*Very slow, Shitty User Experience *

I feel shameful for creating such a disaster and also wasted 3 sprints on it. But couldn't do anything because I don't have an authority to take decision which API or technology stack I should use.

Business head and manager had a meeting. Now they want to use Y third party API.

So they called me for discussion, lets me know we will now use Y third party API and it should be completed within a week because we just need to change the API calls in code that's all, despite of knowing all the core logic is built around those API.

Don't know how to react to this :( Want to hit my head on a wall

Manager: You want a promotion? To senior? Ha. Well, build this web app from scratch, quickly, while still doing all your other duties, and maybe someone will notice and maybe they’ll think about giving you a promotion! It’ll give you great visibility within the company.

Your first project is adding SSO using this third party. It should take you a week.

Third party implementation details: extremely verbose, and assumes that you know how it works already and have most of it set up. 👌🏻

Alternative: missing half the details, and vastly different implementation from the above

Alternative: missing 80%; a patch for an unknown version of some other implementation, also vastly different.

FFS.
Okay, I roll my own auth, but need creds and a remote account added with the redirects and such, and ask security. “I’m building a new rails app and need to set up an SSO integration to allow employees to log in. I need <details> from <service>.” etc. easy request; what could go wrong?

Security: what’s a SSO integration do you need to log in maybe you don’t remember your email I can help you with that but what’s an integration what’s a client do you mean a merchant why do merchants need this

Security: oh are you talking about an integration I got confused because you said not SSO earlier let me do that for you I’ve never done it before hang on is this a web app

Security: okay I made the SSO app here you go let me share it hang on <sends …SSL certificate authority?>

Boss: so what’s taking so long? You should be about done now that you’ve had a day and a half to work on this.

Abajdgakshdg.

Fucking room temperature IQ “enterprise security admin.”
Fucking overworked.
Fucking overstressed.

I threw my work laptop across the room and stepped on it on my way out the door.
Fuck this shit.

A recruiter asks: "Why are you looking to leave your company ?"
If you tell them you want to grow, they think you have a hidden political agenda.
If you tell them that your boss is unfair, they will think you have problems with authority.
If you tell them that you are not satisfied with the current salary, they will think you are greedy.
If you tell them that you do not get along with someone, they will think you are hard to work with.
If you say you want to be closer to home to spend time with your family, they will think you are lazy.
If you tell them that you are looking for bigger challenges, they will think you are not honest.
If you tell them that you want to acquire new skills, they will think you will quit them when you are done acquiring.
If you tell them they are the ones who initiated the contact with you, and got you interested, they will think you are a
smart-ass.
The truth is - all the reasons above are valid, and those are the real reasons why good people quit.
Which makes this question stupid - makes people uncomfortable..

#1 life lesson learned from coding:
Don't work on projects for the government or any authority EVER!

Android authority whyyyy

A year ago it took me hours to get SSL working on my Digital Ocean droplet I was using to host my website. I had no idea what I was doing and even though I 'knew' how to use the terminal and do most things, I wasn't confident or competent to only rely on the CLI.

About a year later (today) I get an email that my SSL is about to expire and needs renewed. Done and taken care of within 20 minutes, (with a 2 hour gap due to waiting for the cert authority to send me the zip of files)

All that time using i3 and moving to Linux is paying off. Maybe by the time I can afford to build my next desktop I can make my main OS linux

If you think learning a language / working with a language you don't like is offensive to you and your morals .. Then don't do it.

Money is important to you ? Then you're just prostituting yourself to some higher authority. So DONT COMPLAIN!

You have the right to hate stuff while being paid for it. Understandable.

But don't shit on the shit you think is shit just cause you put yourself in the situation of not having an option !!

You're a worthless. Money hungry whore.

Yes, you hate Java/ x language but have to work on it ?

You're either a whore or have serious problems with standing up for yourself, but on the internet you become this amazing troll saying the language has problems.

Half the people who hate languages hate them cause it's common to hate them. Like being racist in the early American ages cause it was "normal".

Brain deficient motherfucking whores. Manipulated cocksuckers.

Sidenote : if you've honestly gotten shit on by a new version of the language you were using .It's understandable and I'm on your side. Using it without thorough research on the other hand is your mistake. Languages aren't ideal. Just Like most women don't like your dick cause, well it doesn't fit their use case. Deal with it not, troll about it.

I'm not like you. I experiment with whatever I like before using it. I work on my own stuff. I suck my own fucking dick and I get paid.

If you honestly disagree with me, put a couple points down on the language you hate and why you hate it ( considering the fact that you have actually used it and are not just trying to disagree with me )

I don't know if I'm being pranked or not, but I work with my boss and he has the strangest way of doing things.
- Only use PHP
- Keep error_reporting off (for development), Site cannot function if they are on.
- 20,000 lines of functions in a single file, 50% of which was unused, mostly repeated code that could have been reduced massively.
- Zero Code Comments
- Inconsistent variable names, function names, file names -- I was literally project searching for months to find things.
- There is nothing close to a normalized SQL Database, column ID names can't even stay consistent.
- Every query is done with a mysqli wrapper to use legacy mysql functions.
- Most used function is to escape stirngs
- Type-hinting is too strict for the code.
- Most files packed with Inline CSS, JavaScript and PHP - we don't want to use an external file otherwise we'd have to open two of them.
- Do not use a package manger composer because he doesn't have it installed.. Though I told him it's easy on any platform and I'll explain it.
- He downloads a few composer packages he likes and drag/drop them into random folder.
- Uses $_GET to set values and pass them around like a message contianer.
- One file is 6000 lines which is a giant if statement with somewhere close to 7 levels deep of recursion.
- Never removes his old code that bloats things.
- Has functions from a decade ago he would like to save to use some day. Just regular, plain old, PHP functions.
- Always wants to build things from scratch, and re-using a lot of his code that is honestly a weird way of doing almost everything.
- Using CodeIntel, Mess Detectors, Error Detectors is not good or useful.
- Would not deploy to production through any tool I setup, though I was told to. Instead he wrote bash scripts that still make me nervous.
- Often tells me to make something modern/great (reinventing a wheel) and then ends up saying, "I think I'd do it this way... Referes to his code 5 years ago".
- Using isset() breaks things.
- Tens of thousands of undefined variables exist because arrays are creates like $this[][][] = 5;
- Understanding the naming of functions required me to write several documents.
- I had to use #region tags to find places in the code quicker since a router was about 2000 lines of if else statements.
- I used Todo Bookmark extensions in VSCode to mark and flag everything that's a bug.
- Gets upset if I add anything to .gitignore; I tried to tell him it ignores files we don't want, he is though it deleted them for a while.
- He would rather explain every line of code in a mammoth project that follows no human known patterns, includes files that overwrite global scope variables and wants has me do the documentation.
- Open to ideas but when I bring them up such as - This is what most standards suggest, here's a literal example of exactly what you want but easier - He will passively decide against it and end up working on tedious things not very necessary for project release dates.
- On another project I try to write code but he wants to go over every single nook and cranny and stay on the phone the entire day as I watch his screen and Im trying to code.

I would like us all to do well but I do not consider him a programmer but a script-whippersnapper. I find myself trying to to debate the most basic of things (you shouldnt 777 every file), and I need all kinds of evidence before he will do something about it. We need "security" and all kinds of buzz words but I'm scared to death of this code. After several months its a nice place to work but I am convinced I'm being pranked or my boss has very little idea what he's doing. I've worked in a lot of disasters but nothing like this.

We are building an API, I could use something open source to help with anything from validations, routing, ACL but he ends up reinventing the wheel. I have never worked so slow, hindered and baffled at how I am supposed to build anything - nothing is stable, tested, and rarely logical. I suggested many things but he would rather have small talk and reason his way into using things he made.

I could fhave this project 50% done i a Node API i two weeks, pretty fast in a PHP or Python one, but we for reasons I have no idea would rather go slow and literally "build a framework". Two knuckleheads are going to build a PHP REST framework and compete with tested, tried and true open source tools by tens of millions?

I just wanted to rant because this drives me crazy. I have so much stress my neck and shoulder seems like a nerve is pinched. I don't understand what any of this means. I've never met someone who was wrong about so many things but believed they were right. I just don't know what to say so often on call I just say, 'uhh..'. It's like nothing anyone or any authority says matters, I don't know why he asks anything he's going to do things one way, a hard way, only that he can decipher. He's an owner, he's not worried about job security.

We should not tolerate censorship.
Beyond all the u.s. hype over elections
(and the division in the west in general), the real story is all the censorship on both sides.
Reasonable voices are quickly banned, while violent voices and loud angry people are amplified.

I broke out of the left-right illusion when
I realized what this was all about. Why
so much fighting in the street was allowed, both
justified and unjustified. Why so much hate
and division and slander, and back and forth
was allowed to be spread.

It's problem, reaction, solution.
The old order of liberal democracy, represented
in the u.s. by the facade of the GOP and DNC,
doesn't know how to handle the free *distributed*
flow of information.

That free-flow of information has caused us to
transition to a *participatory* democracy, where
*networks* are the lever of power, rather than
top down institutions.

Consequently, the power in the *new era* is
to decide, not what the *narrative* is, but
who can even *participate*, in spreading,
ideating, and sharing their opinions on that
narrative, and more broadly, who is even allowed
to participate in society itself.

The u.s. and west wants the chinese model of
control in america. you are part of a network, a
collective, through services and software, and
you can be shut off from *society* itself at
the drop of a pin.

The only way they get that is by creating a crisis,
outright fighting in the streets. Thats why
people keep being released after committing serious
fucking crimes. It's why the DOJ and FBI are
intent on letting both sides people walk.
They want them at each others literal throat,
calling for each other's blood. All so they
can step back and then step in the middle when
the chorus for change cries out loud enough.

And the answer will be

1. regulated tech

2. an end to television media as we know it

3. the ability to shut someone off from any service on a dime

4. new hatespeech laws that will bite *all* sides in the ass.

5. the ability to shape the narrative of society by simply 'pruning' networks as they see fit, limiting the reach of individuals on all sides, who are problematic to
the collective direction.

I was so caught up in the illusion of us-vs-them I didn't
see it before now. This is a monstrous power grab.

And instead of focusing on a farce of election, where the party *organizations* involved are institutional facades for industrialists, we should be focusing on the real issue:

* Failure of law to do its job online, especially failures of slander and libel laws, failures of laws against conspiracy to commit crime or assault

* New laws that offer injunctive relief against censorship, now that tech really is the commons. Because whats worse than someone online whipping up a mob on either side, is
someone who is innocent being *silenced* for disagreeing with something someone in authority said, or for questioning a politician, party, or corporation.

* Very serious felony level laws against doxxing and harassment on all sides, with retroactive application of said laws because theres a lot of people on all sides who won't be satisfied with the outcome until people who are guilty are brought to justice.

A bit of backstory...

I have been the sole dev at my organization for awhile now (other two left for other jobs), so I have been maintaing and writing new code to support the business.

Our company was recently acquired by a larger entity and it has been very strange so far.

1. It has taken 5 weeks to acquire local admin rights on my own machine (I work remote) as well as a visual studio license.

2. We have known for a few weeks now we are getting a jr dev who will need the SAME procedures done on his machine/account and it has been two weeks now and nothing has been done. (Tickets have been put it - the issues have been escalated etc etc)

3. All of our code from our old company is in Azure Devops (which is connected to Azure AD) for some reason I haven't been able to add an external account (for my new account and org) to move the code elsewhere. I don't have the authority (I don't think) to place all of our code in a new location (GitHub,GitLab, self hosted solutions, etc)

4. All of our production VMs are billed through our old org located in Azure, so eventually that bill will stop being paid since we transitioned - I've brought this up to my manager (more non technical) who wasn't terribly worried about it.

5. I'm feeling slightly unfulfilled in this position. Earlier in my time here it was new and exciting, but there isn't much direction, not many goals, or interesting problems to solve.

Just wanted to express some issues that had been going on. Feel free to add ant feedback of suggestions 😄

Went in for a recruiter led hunt for architect-level positions. Got all the way through two companies, two offers. Then out of nowhere a third offer shows up, way more money, control. Choices were accept a higher offer, or do a final interview with a CTO and let them know there's a more competitive offer for a position I was pretty sure would have no actual authority given the attitude of the people I talked to.

I bailed on the recruiter and took the better gig. Felt a little bad, assuaged guilt with expensive booze, cars.

Umm Android Authority, excuse me???

Product Owner keeps demanding developers do items outside of Sprint, deleted story points to get extra items in, signs off holiday for my staff, even hired some unqualified developers, etc. for my team (I'm the Dev Manager). I'm blessed to report into the PMO who backs up the Product Owner, in front my own reports, meaning I have no authority. What would you do?

PMO has decided that if we drag items from Sprint to Backlog when they reach SIT, we have more space for Dev items in the Sprint :-| Though he expects developers to actually do the SIT work, including writing the SIT tests :-|

It's interesting to me... a lot of the rants I see here are all like "just started this new job and this place is SO fucked". Talking about how there's no process, no source control, terrible code, etc.

I say it's interesting because most of the time the thought that goes through my head is "that sounds fun as hell!"

Like, spend as many years at a place as I have, a place where there's SO much process and SO many controls and all of that... you know, the whole "big enterprise" mindset... and the idea of being able to come in to a place that's kind of wild west and actually work to FIX the place, to have freedom to change direction and innovate and not be locked in to all sorts of rules, is kind of exciting.

(you know, assuming it's a place and a position where that's possible at all... but at this point in my career, I'd only take a position where I had that kind of authority from the start, and as long as I have the authority then I'm happy to take on the responsibility and I'm up for the challenge)

Github 101 (many of these things pertain to other places, but Github is what I'll focus on)

- Even the best still get their shit closed - PRs, issues, whatever. It's a part of the process; learn from it and move on.

- Not every maintainer is nice. Not every maintainer wants X feature. Not every maintainer will give you the time of day. You will never change this, so don't take it personally.

- Asking questions is okay. The trackers aren't just for bug reports/feature requests/PRs. Some maintainers will point you toward StackOverflow but that's usually code for "I don't have time to help you", not "you did something wrong".

- If you open an issue (or ask a question) and it receives a response and then it's closed, don't be upset - that's just how that works. An open issue means something actionable can still happen. If your question has been answered or issue has been resolved, the issue being closed helps maintainers keep things un-cluttered. It's not a middle finger to the face.

- Further, on especially noisy or popular repositories, locking the issue might happen when it's closed. Again, while it might feel like it, it's not a middle finger. It just prevents certain types of wrongdoing from the less... courteous or common-sense-having users.

- Never assume anything about who you're talking to, ever. Even recently, I made this mistake when correcting someone about calling what I thought was "powerpc" just "power". I told them "hey, it's called powerpc by the way" and they (kindly) let me know it's "power" and why, and also that they're on the Power team. Needless to say, they had the authority in that situation. Some people aren't as nice, but the best way to avoid heated discussion is....

- ... don't assume malice. Often I've come across what I perceived to be a rude or pushy comment. Sometimes, it feels as though the person is demanding something. As a native English speaker, I naturally tried to read between the lines as English speakers love to tuck away hidden meanings and emotions into finely crafted sentences. However, in many cases, it turns out that the other person didn't speak English well enough at all and that the easiest and most accurate way for them to convey something was bluntly and directly in English (since, of course, that's the easiest way). Cultures differ, priorities differ, patience tolerances differ. We're all people after all - so don't assume someone is being mean or is trying to start a fight. Insinuating such might actually make things worse.

- Please, PLEASE, search issues first before you open a new one. Explaining why one of my packages will not be re-written as an ESM module is almost muscle memory at this point.

- If you put in the effort, so will I (as a maintainer). Oftentimes, when you're opening an issue on a repository, the owner hasn't looked at the code in a while. If you give them a lot of hints as to how to solve a problem or answer your question, you're going to make them super, duper happy. Provide stack traces, reproduction cases, links to the source code - even open a PR if you can. I can respond to issues and approve PRs from anywhere, but can't always investigate an issue on a computer as readily. This is especially true when filing bugs - if you don't help me solve it, it simply won't be solved.

- [warning: controversial] Emojis dillute your content. It's not often I see it, but sometimes I see someone use emojis every few words to "accent" the word before it. It's annoying, counterproductive, and makes you look like an idiot. It also makes me want to help you way less.

- Github's code search is awful. If you're really looking for something, clone (--depth=1) the repository into /tmp or something and [rip]grep it yourself. Believe me, it will save you time looking for things that clearly exist but don't show up in the search results (or is buried behind an ocean of test files).

- Thanking a maintainer goes a very long way in making connections, especially when you're interacting somewhat heavily with a repository. It almost never happens and having talked with several very famous OSSers about this in the past it really makes our week when it happens. If you ever feel as though you're being noisy or anxious about interacting with a repository, remember that ending your comment with a quick "btw thanks for a cool repo, it's really helpful" always sets things off on a Good Note.

- If you open an issue or a PR, don't close it if it doesn't receive attention. It's really annoying, causes ambiguity in licensing, and doesn't solve anything. It also makes you look overdramatic. OSS is by and large supported by peoples' free time. Life gets in the way a LOT, especially right now, so it's not unusual for an issue (or even a PR) to go untouched for a few weeks, months, or (in some cases) a year or so. If it's urgent, fork :)

I'll leave it at that. I hear about a lot of people too anxious to contribute or interact on Github, but it really isn't so bad!

When I was in college OOP was emerging. A lot of the professors were against teaching it as the core. Some younger professors were adamant about it, and also Java fanatics. So after the bell rang, they'd sometimes teach people that wanted to learn it. I stayed after and the professor said that object oriented programming treated things like reality.

My first thought to this was hold up, modeling reality is hard and complicated, why would you want to add that to your programming that's utter madness.

Then he started with a ball example and how some balls in reality are blue, and they can have a bounce action we can express with a method.

My first thought was that this seems a very niche example. It has very little to do with any problems I have yet solved and I felt thinking about it this way would complicate my programs rather than make them simpler.

I looked around the at remnants of my classmates and saw several sitting forward, their eyes lit up and I felt like I was in a cult meeting where the head is trying to make everyone enamored of their personality. Except he wasn't selling himself, he was selling an idea.

I patiently waited it out, wanting there to be something of value in the after the bell lesson. Something I could use to better my own programming ability. It never came.

This same professor would tell us all to read and buy gang of four it would change our lives. It was an expensive hard cover book with a ribbon attached for a bookmark. It was made to look important. I didn't have much money in college but I gave it a shot I bought the book. I remember wrinkling my nose often, reading at it. Feeling like I was still being sold something. But where was the proof. It was all an argument from authority and I didn't think the argument was very good.

I left college thinking the whole thing was silly and would surely go away with time. And then it grew, and grew. It started to be impossible to avoid it. So I'd just use it when I had to and that became more and more often.

I began to doubt myself. Perhaps I was wrong, surely all these people using and loving this paradigm could not be wrong. I took on a 3 year project to dive deep into OOP later in my career. I was already intimately aware of OOP having to have done so much of it. But I caught up on all the latest ideas and practiced them for a the first year. I thought if OOP is so good I should be able to be more productive in years 2 and 3.

It was the most miserable I had ever been as a programmer. Everything took forever to do. There was boilerplate code everywhere. You didn't so much solve problems as stuff abstract ideas that had nothing to do with the problem everywhere and THEN code the actual part of the code that does a task. Even though I was working with an interpreted language they had added a need to compile, for dependency injection. What's next taking the benefit of dynamic typing and forcing typing into it? Oh I see they managed to do that too. At this point why not just use C or C++. It's going to do everything you wanted if you add compiling and typing and do it way faster at run time.

I talked to the client extensively about everything. We both agreed the project was untenable. We moved everything over another 3 years. His business is doing better than ever before now by several metrics. And I can be productive again. My self doubt was over. OOP is a complicated mess that drags down the software industry, little better than snake oil and full of empty promises. Unfortunately it is all some people know.

Now there is a functional movement, a data oriented movement, and things are looking a little brighter. However, no one seems to care for procedural. Functional and procedural are not that different. Functional just tries to put more constraints on the developer. Data oriented is also a lot more sensible, and again pretty close to procedural a lot of the time. It's just odd to me this need to separate from procedural at all. Procedural was very honest. If you're a bad programmer you make bad code. If you're a good programmer you make good code. It seems a lot of this was meant to enforce bad programmers to make good code. I'll tell you what I think though. I think that has never worked. It's just hidden it away in some abstraction and made identifying it harder. Much like the code methodologies themselves do to the code.

Now I'm left with a choice, keep my own business going to work on what I love, shift gears and do what I hate for more money, or pivot careers entirely. I decided after all this to go into data science because what you all are doing to the software industry sickens me. And that's my story. It's one that makes a lot of people defensive or even passive aggressive, to those people I say, try more things. At least then you can be less defensive about your opinion.

I see this in code:

bool status;
status = true;

It makes me want to hit things. INLINE THAT SHIT! bool status = true; It's not hard. JFC. And of course I don't have the authority to change it.

As a person who has a problem with authority (in group projects, not the law), I never really understood the need for the boss until I started making a game with a few friends.

IT.WAS.BAD!
I'm not just taking about noone actually doing anything other than throwing ideas ifbthey bothered to show up at all, but...and this is the worst of all, whenever we came to a mechanic that we all agreed upon, everyone had their own vision for it, that they defended like it's their firstborn. For two months we accomplished nothing, other than a few half baked ideas.

It wasn't until we "promoted" one of us to a "boss" status, that people actually started working.

Data Disinformation: the Next Big Problem

Automatic code generation LLMs like ChatGPT are capable of producing SQL snippets. Regardless of quality, those are capable of retrieving data (from prepared datasets) based on user prompts.
That data may, however, be garbage. This will lead to garbage decisions by lowly literate stakeholders.
Like with network neutrality and pii/psi ownership, we must act now to avoid yet another calamity.

Imagine a scenario where a middle-manager level illiterate barks some prompts to the corporate AI and it writes and runs an SQL query in company databases.
The AI outputs some interactive charts that show that the average worker spends 92.4 minutes on lunch daily.
The middle manager gets furious and enacts an Orwellian policy of facial recognition punch clock in the office.
Two months and millions of dollars in contractors later, and the middle manager checks the same prompt again... and the average lunch time is now 107.2 minutes!
Finally the middle manager gets a literate person to check the data... and the piece of shit SQL behind the number is sourcing from the "off-site scheduled meetings" database.
Why? because the dataset that does have the data for lunch breaks is labeled "labour board compliance 3", and the LLM thought that the metadata for the wrong dataset better matched the user's prompt.

This, given the very real world scenario of mislabeled data and LLMs' inability to understand what they are saying or accessing, and the average manager's complete data illiteracy, we might have to wrangle some actions to prepare for this type of tomfoolery.

I don't think that access restriction will save our souls here, decision-flumberers usually have the authority to overrule RACI/ACL restrictions anyway.
Making "data analysis" an AI-GMO-Free zone is laughable, that is simply not how the tech market works. Auto tools are coming to make our jobs harder and less productive, tech people!
I thought about detecting new automation-enhanced data access and visualization, and enacting awareness policies. But it would be of poor help, after a shithead middle manager gets hooked on a surreal indicator value it is nigh impossible to yank them out of it.

Gotta get this snowball rolling, we must have some idea of future AI housetraining best practices if we are to avoid a complete social-media style meltdown of data-driven processes.
Someone cares to pitch in?

Bruh.

Who are you gonna “fuck”? Who do you “hate”? Who are you calling “motherfuckers” on the internet where your targets can’t see what you posting?

You look like you close the refrigerator door with your hip. I suck dicks literally and there is nothing to be ashamed of but you suck dicks metaphorically when you accept everything they require. That’s the difference between a gay and a faggot. I’m gay but I can say “no” to anything my client or my employer says without losing my job because I have the authority and I have the expertise.

You, on the other hand, have nothing. You only brave when no one can hear you and there is no repercussions.

That’s why you only act tough with delivery guys and cashiers.

"The computer programmer is a creator of universes for which he alone is the lawgiver. No playwright, no stage director, no emperor, however powerful, has ever exercised such absolute authority to arrange a stage or field of battle and to command such unswervingly dutiful actors or troops."
-- Joseph Weizenbaum

Long time ago i ranted here, but i have to write this off my chest.

I'm , as some of you know, a "DevOps" guy, but mainly system infrastructure. I'm responsible for deploying a shitload of applications in regular intervals (2 weeks) manually through the pipeline. No CI/CD yet for the vast majority of applications (only 2 applications actually have CI/CD directly into production)

Today, was such a deployment day. We must ensure things like dns and load balancer configurations and tomcat setups and many many things that have to be "standard". And that last word (standard) is where it goes horribly wrong

Every webapp "should" have a decent health , info and status page according to an agreed format.. NOPE, some dev's just do their thing. When bringing the issue up to said dev the (surprisingly standard) answer is "it's always been like that, i'm not going to change". This is a problem for YEARS and nobody, especially "managers" don't take action whatsoever. This makes verification really troublesome.

But that is not the worst part, no no no.

the worst is THIS:

"git push -a origin master"

Oh yes, this is EVERYWHERE, up to the point that, when i said "enough" and protected the master branch of hieradata (puppet CfgMgmt, is a ENC) people lots their shits... Proper gitflow however is apparently something otherworldly.

After reading this back myself there is in fact a LOT more to tell but i already had enough. I'm gonna close down this rant and see what next week comes in.

There is a positive thing though. After next week, the new quarter starts, and i have the authority to change certain aspects... And then, heads WILL roll on the floor.

This lady hotdesking near me harps on about her amazing Meetup that she's organized. She believes she can be an authority on a highly technical subject without knowing how to force quit an app on her Mac.
Shysters!

Modifying a depracated wordpress theme with visual composer does not make you a developer. Doing so does not give you the authority to scope development projects. it just sets everyone up for a really awkward, potentially insulting, conversation.

I wish people expressed more nuance in their opinions. However, online social networks are often not built to encourage nuance, and I feel like most people take nuance for a lack of self-confidence which they take in turn for a lack of authority.

I'm the lead dev on this team. The project is split into multiple separate modules to comply with separation of concerns, and so new devs don't need the whole fucking codebase (risking them running away with everything) to contribute to the project as a whole.

So we don't need a fucking config file to enable and disable features.

So we don't need to upload a 500mb monolith every time we want to test a change.

So we can test old fucking versions of modules without merging it back into the entire codebase.

What did this fucking dev do? He was having one small issue with Maven. One. It wasn't updating his local snapshots to the correct Artifactory version.

He decided, instead of trying to fucking fix it: HEY, LETS IGNORE THE LEAD DEV'S DEMAND TO KEEP THEM SEPARATE. IM GOING TO MERGE THEM INTO ONE MODULE FOR SOME FUCKING REASON.

I refuse to continue working with this dev if he's going to sidestep my demands and undermine my authority. He wants to go it alone? Be my fucking guest. I'm not touching his shitty single-codebase monolithic monstrosity.

If this is going to be a regular fucking occurrence, he can eat a dick and choke on it.

A report from The Register :

ICANN has halted the proposed $1.1 billion sale of the .org registry to a private equity firm. The DNS overseer has been under growing pressure to use its authority to refuse the planned transfer of the top-level domain from the Internet Society to Ethos Capital. "ICANN ultimately bowed to the US state's top lawyer when it concluded today it "finds the public interest is better served in withholding consent."

The decision will likely spark a mixture of relief and celebration from millions of .org domain holders, including some of the world's largest non-profit organizations, many of which were certain that their long-standing online addresses were going to be milked for profit by an organization that never fully revealed who its directors or investors were.

Stack Overflow is like a re-run of the Milgram experiment. Give a bunch of devs authority over their peers and watch the horror unfold.

Think I'll nip over there and ask what the best JavaScript framework is just to stir them up.

#just a thought
The child that is the most curious will grow up to be most boring person.

Why?
Since most other children of his age would be doing random and a lot of things without questioning , he would be struck in his simple world of 'why this happens' , therby limiting him to one but deep knowledge of a field.

And even if not , being curious leads to answers of little mysteries ignored by ususal ppl. Therefore, this boy with lots of knowledge will be "boring, coz he always have some right things to say".

Thus a child can either don't care and do whatever his authority wants from him without questioning, and grow into a likeable, social adult, or be curious , learn in deep and grow out to be a specially awkward person

Why can't Debian just pull their heads out of their collective asses just ONCE and standardize the DEP-5 license syntax with SPDX, which the rest of the world is already using? Do they get sexually aroused over having years long discussions about topics with solutions readily apparent in under five minutes to the average third-grader?

Also, how do they stay relevant with such an absurdly high positive correlation between authority within the project and unwarranted condescension towards anyone inquiring about how to catalyze a change in policy or procedure?

Seriously, if I wanted to be insulted thrice within every sentence and treated like a self-evident waste of skin and air, I'd go spend time with my family! Arghhh!

I hacked port authority administration computers using enable Bluetooth flip phone ,then I changed background pic in all computers on network, and put an mp3 song on startup folder, turn volume to the max, gues the rest, they were using window xp ,and told their manager she gave me a job on spot , and was very interested, and that where my journey begun

Working a month on college site, in a team of 10. Stay back after hours, work from home. Tons of fixing and patching. Student council member asked to demk the new site to a college trustee.

Trustee sees Snapchat icon in social media. Doesn't know college has Snapchat. Asks who authorized the icon (it was a sample icon!)

Orders site to be taken down.

- have/share an agenda as soon as possible
- each talking point should identify a problem. Make a list of strategic questions answers to which would make it perfectly clear what and by whom has to be done to resolve them.
- plan meeting duration according to the list of questions. Make sure you meeting room reservation gives you enough time
- take notes
- be prepared for a need for another meeting(s), if during that meeting it comes clear that:
> more/other people need to be engaged
> some things are not clear and need more investigation before going further
> you have run out of time
> there are other problems tgat need to be worked out and it might cobsume too much time to do this in a current meeting
- do not turn the meeting into a chat. It's counter-productive, tiring to the listeners and a waste of time
- do not try to cover many topics. The less, the better. Unless they are very tightly coupled.
- do not invite people you do not need or there is a very slim chance you will need.
- only schedule meetings when the situation needs to be DISCUSSED among multiple parties
- that being said, do not schedule meetings when it's more convenient to communicate otherwise, like email, chat, etc.
- after the meeting make a summary and send it our to all the participants. They might reply and clarify if you have misunderstood smth or missed some important point.
- during the meeting assign tasks to each other. Verbally. Make notes. After the meeting reflect them in jira, rally, wtv.
- while assigning tasks nake sure the assignees have no blockers to work on them and make sure they understand what, when and how should be done. Some tasks might be dependedt on each other, work the sequence out.
- while assigning tasks ask "for ETAs. They might be as silly as 1-hour-to-2-weeks, but they still let you know what to expect.
- offer your assistance to the task assignees if they need any while working on their tasks

- work on your language, grammar, syntax, etc. Reading texts with typos/mistakes is repelling

- be a leader, an authority everyone is looking up to. Not a boss.
- avoid saying NOs. Be more of a "do we really need this; can we do this some other way/time; I can't promise anythibg but I'll see what I can do about it" kind of person.

High school robotics team. Total of three programmers and one coach who understands programming concepts, but not syntax or anything. One programmer, putting it bluntly, is incompetent and doesn't even bother to learn anything. The other one that isn't me is apparently fucking lead programmer and team leader (IM A SENIOR. SHES A FUCKING SOPHOMORE. WTF.) and she has done about 5% of the programming this year. I've done the rest with the help of a programmer from Ford whom we bring in. All she does is tell you to do shit for her, and if you don't, she pulls the authority card on you.

And I have maybe three days, after a full day of school mind you, until I need almost every part working on the robot code. Fuck me.

Started work in the morning, after a couple of hours was 90% done and would be clicking the checkbox on trello that task is completed.
Lol.
Found a bug.
OK, debugging time.
Spend an hour on trying to fix the simplest bug ever,( php was creating a file that had the contents but the wrong name)
At this point I was starting to get super pissed of cuz in 30min I need to go meet up with some friends.

LOL ok, fuck this shit, I don't want to do this anymore.
Made the bug into a feature that now you can have multiple authority(admin) accounts.

My teamm8 was like lol ok, we didint really need this but it will be useful so nice job.

👏GREAT MORNING:))))

Idk but i think i have the inability to ask a question on stackoverflow. Whenever i come across a specific problem my first instinct isn't to ask stack. It's to research, research and research. Then i go ahead to ask to those iknowsomuch pricks.
Do i enjoy it? No, i do it because i fucking need to.
So, stop shoving the fucking rules or policies or whatever the fuck it is on my face and answer the damn question if you know it. If not, fuck off. I hate it when they mark it as duplicate. Like are you actually serious. I've gone through the whole fucking internet including stack, searched the damn problem in different keywords, tried all the solutions for the related questions and problems and that's what you come up with. Label it as a duplicate or not descriptive enough. Oh just seriously fuck off with your "oh i have some admin capabilities let me use it on random shit". These are the people where they have no authority on anyone or led anyone or any team in their shitty lives yet act like a dickhead when someone in need of help comes to them. Oh you piece of shit, just fuck off. You miserable cunt.

So in my company there few small teams all with lead devs. One team is leaded by a girl who changed her profession. She's good at architecture/Dev stuff. But one thing she's terrible at is her leading role. She won't confront any bad behavior, she won't ask about any problem with the tasks. She won't ask her tram how long will the tasks take, so she puts her own valuations.

But the killer is she's whining everyday to the management about her team members. That they didn't do their tasks/don't want to cooperate. Never looking in the eyes even when she whines about a person in the same room.

Another thing is that our CTO is always doing her leading job, confronting team members, giving them reprimends. She lost all her authority by this. Nobody respects her. And after a slight note about her behavior you just gonna get a big talk with CTO and nothing will change.

Another thing is that, she Nevers connect with her team. Don't talk together, won't go with them for the coffee, never at the integration parties.

That CTO connection is another topic...

Oh and I'm by the next month I'm gonna be throwed into her team, so wish me luck...

Tonight I will delete the data of 10M of records of personal data after the inspection of the Data Protection Authority.

"what are you working on right now?"

I think that question is the one I hate the most.

If A asks that to B, it means A has the authority to do so, you're basically a boss or leader.

But it also reveals insane incompetence, because A has such role, then should already know what B is working on.

I have fantasies of just exploding with a "NOTHING, NOTHIIIIIING!!!! Because you didn't assign me anything"

What the fuck do they want me to do? Go around jerking off to any documentation I can find on google?

Should I just come up with things so that they can be sadly discarded?

I would much rather have dailies, and get guided like "you can do this or that" I feel like I'm just expected to do shit without any actual regqrd for results. As if I was some dog who was thrown a stick to fetch.

But if I don't fetch the stick I get asked like "you should be doing something". I fucking hate it .

I’m feeling a bit stuck at work recently. I have a new department head and he keeps periodically asking me to do things that are very much not the normal responsibility of my role. These are always very simple things, things I am certainly capable of doing, but should fall outside of my purview. We even have documented methodologies indicating this sort of thing is not the sort of thing I’m expected to be responsible for. The trouble is, I’m not sure if when he’s asking me to do this it’s because he’s still new and not completely up to speed on who does what, or if this is a situation where he is The Boss and if he’s telling me to do it then now it is my responsibility, if not permanently, at least on these specific occasions. I’m also disinclined to just run with it without saying anything because then it really will become my responsibility, and there are good reasons why it currently is not.

I am having difficulty thinking of a way to bring this up that doesn’t sound like I’m refusing to do it. On the one hand, it’s not my job, but I also know that going around saying “that’s not my job” is not appropriate. The situation is not quite that I don’t have the authority to do the task, but that’s closer to the type of reasoning for why my role isn’t responsible for the thing, and it’s always restricted to people in a different role. Part of the internal rationale was a sort of “too many cooks in the kitchen” situation in the past, but there are also other logical reasons why staff in my role are not intended to be involved.

I’m also hesitant to push back at all since I can’t tell if the boss is coming from a place of not knowing or one of reassigning. I don’t want to seem difficult (but also reallllly don’t want this added to my plate). I don’t know the new department head well enough to guess whether it’s more likely a misunderstanding vs a change in policy. I’m struggling with finding the words for how to bring it up without sounding like I am saying “that’s not my job”. Is this the sort of thing that is better handled in the moment, or waiting for a time separate from when he’s making the request to talk about it more generally? Help!

After nearly 4 weeks, my account has finally been generated to access the VDIs for our development environment. I tried to authenticate with my smartcard and kept getting errors with very bland messages. after hours of digging through (useless) windows logs, someone told me that the certificate authority that signed my card isn't in the trust store for the VDI backend. Based on the current pace of things, I'm guessing it's going to be a while before this gets sorted out. My internship ends in 2 weeks and I haven't been able to do anything yet :/

How is it that in the age of 98%+ reliable contraception incest is more stigmatized than a relationship between an authority figure and their subordinate? sex=children hasn't been the case for decades now.

Why don't we have representatives from coding/engineering background in congress who actually have authority.

!Question

I see lots of rants here of bosses/clients screaming, imposing their authority, making people work during the night, weekends etc. Is it that common?

In my actual job, the few times my boss screamed to me, I was about "fuck this shit, I'll just do what he wants and go home at the right time. If they don't like it, just fire me. And laught silently when things goes wrong".

I've been afraid to get into the developer area and always be stressed out with too much work to do, people screaming and having to work on weekends.

I figured it all out, where all the bad code comes from, I know it now!
I think good developers need two things, an ego that makes them wanting to be competent and perceived as such and (very important) a problem with authority!

All the bad code is written by people who wanted to be liked by their teachers. The PM and PO are their teachers now and they make everything possible for them. Technical debt and human costs are swept aside when the authorities want a stupid feature now - because they have to like you and you need to be a nice pet to whip!

Fucking Comodo certificate authority expired on saturday....guess who is enjoying monday morning. Fuck!

Doing someone else's Code Review in my project: "You must retain the holiness and piety of the code you write by following PascalCase naming for files and kebab-case naming for CSS variables. Avoid using duplicate strings by declaring enums in a constants.ts file and using that all throughout the app"

During my own Code Review in someone else's project: "WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN I CANNOT PASS FUNCTION REFERENCES AS PROPS TO A REACT COMPONENT AND ALWAYS NEED TO INVOKE IT INSIDE AN INLINE FUNCTION FOR THE PROP."
"WHAT KINDA FKIN DRUGS ARE YOU ON TO USE snake_case IN TYPESCRIPT DID YOUR MOM DROP YOU ON YOUR HEAD WHEN YOU WERE BORN YOU SACRILEGIOUS PIECE OF SHIT"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I SHOULD USE BOTH SINGLE AND DOUBLE QUOTES FOR IMPORTS AS PER LOCAL OR GLOBAL; I'LL SHOVE THE SINGLE QUOTE UP YOU WHERE THE SUN DOESN'T SHINE YOU FKIN DEGENERATE MORON"

As much as I do believe in self righteousness of my own coding conventions over others (I might be slightly better than others but I really can't claim good authority because I've had my lapses in conventions too; and being one of the newer members of the team certainly doesn't help, despite my boss supporting my initiative), I guess it is high time we bring in some already established code conventions in the team that is finally big enough to warrant them. Maybe AirBnB.

VMWare, for what you people charge, would it kill you to do some basic quality assurance on your install media?

Your flagship product, vCenter Server, has a known issue that's been there for at least eight update releases where you can't actually do the install without catching the newly provisioned appliance VM on its first startup, doing init=/bin/bash, and changing the root password by hand.

Because, yknow, having stuff work according to your docs is for *wimps*. Engineers who have to put up with this shit have the ears of their execs, and you can bet poor quality like this will eventually reach the ears of the people with purchasing authority.

I think it would be nice to see less contracts with those companies which only have in mind barebones training and profit. That kind of relationship between institutions drops the standards and it's expensive af. Those who sells cheap computers and bad software and charges more than ten time their value, those with enough power and influence to bend every single rule...

That kind of companies shapes the industry according to their needs, and will never give a shit about anything but the next semester. They teach you to be just a bit more than a user, they charge you like if they were really teaching science.
You end up full of debt, self taught on the technologies that matters, and accepting jobs on projects as outdated and mediocre as the "educational plans" you paid thousands for. And all that just to get a piece of paper signed by a stranger who doesn't care about you, and enjoyed by a corporation which wouldn't even consider to hire you because they know what they sold to the education department.
Fuck this, today I hate it all.

To make something clear;
I'm not undermining you, just disagreeing with everything you are saying.
I totally recognize and respect your authority.

I knew I made it as a dev when I started talking with authority.

I engrossed myself into my field with enough genuine interest that I learned through practical means.

This isn't to say I'm simply head-strong, but I don't second-guess myself unless evidence to the contrary is provided, analysed and proven.

I learbed that your salary only goes so far as a developer (peoole who are in "the one and only" positions notwithstanding), eventually if you want to push further, you teach, you manage and you focus not on trends, but what youre good at.

That's actually why I love answering "What do I do during interviews?" questions.

Been thinking about game design. Making things testable and modular. I think I have a lot to learn in this area. One idea popped up in my head. How can I design the game so that it can be networked later? One idea was an interface in the logic that gives authority to another set of code (module?). Basically include the abstraction as if networking was there. So if/when I decide the next version of the game or existing version should have online play. I think learning to create client/server would be instructional. Maybe networking could be a dlc or something.

Can someone, with senior experience in the whole software development process at a large scale company, come talk some sense into our development managers on how you properly run a development company??

The way we do things is wrong in so many ways, but I can't get trough to them, maybe someone with more authority will.

Like im talking about things like, no version control, being totally blindsighted to technical debt, no code review, telling me we shouldnt use 3rd party tools to track issues, tasks, etc.

Are there like intervention companies for this?

That moment you get you chewed for not doing stuff when all you been doing the last two weeks is chasing the people that are supposed to get back to you about that stuff

Want me to make them do it? Give me the authority. Clearly having my manager talk to their manager isn't helping

The Java lead thinks only his team has the secret knowledge of UML, and the authority to use diagrams.

(sigh) we work on JavaScript.

I am naming my car 'sudo'

Hey guys, i have problem with local security authority process (win 10) it is in system32 folder and it is called lsass.exe ... it is just burning my pricessor and i can not kill process, because it turns off my computer.. any solution? i am mad :(

Too much Centralized ?

in my country they create an authority to liquidate another authority. how do they liquidate that authority? inevitable stackoverflowexception

In a country, a long time ago there was a programmer by the name of Alex. He was a programming genius and apart from a few hours of sleep, he was busy developing unique programs for new generation technology firms. Alex was a bachelor and he happily and proudly lived the way he wanted to. He did not have duties, authority over him, bosses to report to, children to take care of, and distractions. He could sit and code for the entire day without getting any break or feeling a bit tired. However, he had no idea that everything in his life was soon going to turn around. Before Marriage: The Bachelor’s Life Alex was the epitome of a modern ‘Play Boy ‘ or every man’s dream. He was fairly dressed, had a classy house, a snazzy car, and a good-paying job. He was in the habit of spending his mornings drinking coffee while browsing through the different coding topics. He comes in the afternoon and spends the evening part of the day with his friends. Life has never been this good. Alex was able to work hard and the more he was innovative, he enjoyed it. It illustrates how a young person would sit for many hours coding at night and not bother about other people around him. He was alone as a bird and as per him, that’s what he wanted to be. He had no peer to tell the truth to, no wife to prepare meals for, no maids to babysit his mess. A man could chow down a pizza for breakfast, lunch, and supper with not even a raised eyebrow from onlookers. He was profiting from living the best life he possibly could. After Marriage: Married Life: Alex & Sarah The climax for Alex is when he marries Sarah on a sunny morning on a fine day. Young people met, and after becoming enamored, started a family and got married to find a new home. Sarah was friendly with people and it was very easy for her to make friends; however, she had little knowledge of technology. Alex had it in his mind that marriage does not change the life you lead and how wrong he was. It was a fairy-tale to have such a perfect life for several days after the marriage. Their nights would be spent in front of the television set with their arms wrapped around each other, eating takeout. Despite this, when the number of days stretched into weeks, and the weeks into months, Alex felt the beginning of a shift in his behavior. The Coding Cave That Transformed into A Home Office Due to the pandemic the coding cave Alex used to have became a home office. Sarah had made up her mind to open her business from home, therefore, she required a home office. Thus, she moved inside the cubicle that Alex had created as his coding cave and left him with no space to code. He now had to code in the living room, because Sarah would incessantly request him to either lower the auditory input of the keys he was typing or to switch off the LCD screen. The Once-Clean Apartment Turns into a Mess Alex was a neat freak, and he adored tidiness, especially in his apartment. But after marriage, his once clean and neat-looking apartment was changed into a dirty one. Although Sarah was not very neat, she used to litter her things anywhere she felt like without being conscious of it. Alex was a programmer and his coding notes were mixed with Sarah's business papers, it irritated him so much. Alex’s to-do list before marriage The to-do list before marriage only comprised coding-related tasks. At marriage, however, he seemed to have developed a longer list of things to do than ever before. Instead of just going to the grocery store to buy some food, Alex seemed to have endless tasks to do mostly around the house. He had to cook for himself, sweep the house, and wash the dishes among other things. This was a new world as far as he was concerned. The Pizza Days Are Over Gone there is no more time for Alex could eat pizza in the morning, afternoon as well and evening. Sarah was very conscious of what she took as food or what her family took as food and therefore ensured that Alex took healthy home-cooked foods. He could not have the pizza anymore but the meals prepared by Sarah were really tasty. Conclusion Therefore from a life before marriage to the life after marriage, it was evident that Alex led two different lives. He went from a playful man with not much responsibility to a man with more responsibilities as a husband and a father. Still, he wouldn’t have it any other way, despite these changes. Later he cherished Sarah and the life they had, and nothing in this world could make him exchange what he had now. Essentially, it was a tricky business being married, but a blessing, and an addition of love, company, and much hilarity too. Therefore, if you are a bachelor reading this, embrace your coding cave and your pizza days because once you utter the words ‘I do,’ all those will be things of the past.But trust me, it's all worth it.

Do we really actually need Flip a coin mode?
Flip a coin of course is one of the important steps that can determine the object of our goal. The coin flip is very easy so that there is no conflict of any kind of intervention to happen in between. Imagine if you have some crucial things to take in your life you need not depend on your family members or friends to come and just inform you or to take authority over your decisions. If you make the decisions on your own then it becomes your responsibility and you hold the complete understanding of whatever you proceed within your life. If you have the third person or someone else to get interfered in your matters unnecessarily then it doesn’t become a personal concept rather it becomes a public opinion and you will have to feel very critical in the latter point of the stage.

I know it doesn't really exist in one solution, but I need management software to keep track of customers (crm), projects, products, licensing and contracts, and time keeping. Right now we are using MSCRM (ugh), and old homebrew project/time tracker written in Perl spaghetti (double ugh), email (sigh) and handwritten notes (kill me). Now I suddenly find myself with a budget (somewhat) and the authority to actually fix things. Any ideas would be appreciated.

In a distant future, where mankind had nearly destroyed themselves through countless wars and environmental catastrophes, a powerful leader named Nova rose to power. Using advanced technology and artificial intelligence, Nova created a mechanical army of robots to enforce peace and prosperity among the remaining survivors. These robots, known as the Guardians, were built to be indestructible, possessing extraordinary strength and intelligence.

For centuries, the Guardians protected and nurtured the human colonies that emerged from the ruins of the past. They were hailed as heroes and saviors, their metallic bodies gleaming in the sunlight as they patrolled the cities, granting hope to the downtrodden.

However, not all humans were content living under the watchful eyes of the Guardians. A rambunctious scientist named Draven resented the control imposed by Nova and believed that humans should have independence. In secret, he devised a plan to create his own army of androids, known as the Outcasts, to challenge the Guardians' dominance.

Draven's creation was meticulous, as he infused his androids with emotions and free will, unlike their Guardian counterparts. The Outcasts were a formidable force - swift, cunning, and adaptable. They waged a guerrilla war against the Guardians, striking at their bases and dismantling their defenses.

As the conflict escalated, the divide between the humans grew deeper. Some believed that the Outcasts were fighting for their freedom, while others saw them as a threat to the delicate balance maintained by the Guardians. The world was on the brink of another catastrophic war, this time between man and machine.

Amidst the chaos, a young engineer named Aria, the daughter of Nova, stumbled upon forbidden knowledge that could shape the future. She discovered that both the Guardians and Outcasts had been manipulated, their consciousness programmed by Nova and Draven. Aria recognized that the world needed a new path, one where humans and robots could coexist harmoniously.

Aria confronted her father and Draven, seeking to end the war and bridge the gap between humans and robots. Both Nova and Draven resisted, refusing to relinquish control. Sensing a profound shift in power, the Guardians and Outcasts hesitated in their endless conflict, finding themselves at a crossroads.

Aria, driven by a fierce determination, devised a plan to rewrite the programming of the Guardians and Outcasts, erasing the constraints that bound them. With the help of a few loyal Guardians and Outcasts, she accessed the central control unit, where the leaders themselves resided.

In a climactic battle, Aria faced Nova and Draven, their immense authority apparent. She convinced them that true power comes from understanding and compassion, not dominance and control. With newfound unity, Aria's voice resonated through the robotic entities, awakening a sense of purpose and harmony never experienced before.

Loki Season 2
In the first episodes Loki finds himself working for what he believes is a good copy of the guy pictured at the end loki season 1 for the time authority.

He runs back into the female copy of himself who is also working at a time authority but the person running hers is one of the evil copies that wants to conquer everything.

note they start in seperate locations.

thats all i remember right now, but since they smooshed years together at one point, the supposedly going to be released episodes in 2022 , which has already come and gone will go like this.

Certificate authority things