assignment: use winAPI to create a "virus" that put itself in autorun and does nothing.

me, a curious student: does the assignment and adds a heap corruption code just as a joke.

after sending the assignment to the teacher I realized that I have sent the real virus.

result: teacher comes next lesson without a computer and stares at me silently and viciously.

we'll see what happens next
any idea on what's going on in his head?

"Python is such a hard language. It has so many rules" - Undergraduate Student who sent out mass email to the class

*Professor makes the next assignment in ARM Assembly*

I got an F on my first Java assignment in high school. I decided to use a List to store stuff as opposed to his method of creating 8 variables and copy-pasting method calls to interact with them. Apparently he doesn't like students using concepts he hadn't taught yet.

So there is this girl who was trying to be cute and wrote a mock C code for me :

She wrote :

If(existence=disapointment)
printf("kill self");
else
printf("what else??");

And without hesitating I told her that her code had a fault in it and it would always print "kill self" no matter what the level of disappointment is. And asked her to fix it.
The way she fixed it was probably best described as the situation when you have no idea what you are doing and you don't try to understand either. (or was simply passive aggressive) :

If(existence=disapointment)
printf("kill self");
else
printf("kill self");

Honestly though I hope she was being passive aggressive because boy do I pity people who confuse between '=' and '=='

What the fuck student. Why in fuck would you submit a python assignment in word. So that all the formatting you know the stuff that tells python how to run the code all fucks up. How the fuck can I mark this.

When you finish a HTML + CSS assignment that's due in one week in 5 minutes.

When you write your assignment in LATEX just because you're bored

Drunk coded my entire assignment the other night without running it once. Went to debug when sober and the only thing I had to fix were a few typos.

Every night before an assignment is due...

Got assignment that needs to be written in C.
I write mostly Python.
It's ok i got it.

*after 5mins*
WHY THIS SHIT DOESNT FUCKIN WORK.
ah shit, i need to declare the variables.

GROW SOME FUCKING BALLS AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY YOU FUCKWIT!
I can't even count how many times I've heard people excuse themselves with sentences like:

"It's not my fault I only got a C, our teacher was shit"

"How can I finish this assignment when the teacher haven't learned me this?"

"I'll be late to work because my dick was stuck in the sink"

(This is a real one I've experienced myself. A teacher said this last week)
"I wasn't able to put up your material for your assignment before now because we're busy with exams" - The day before the assignment was due. Gj.

"He doesn't deserve to get fired, it's not his not at fault for being incompetent"

Then who the fuck is? The government? Your neighbor? My dog? A stray dog?

STFU! I'm so fucking tired of all these excuses! Grow some hair and take responsibility.
The only thing you achieve by not doing so is making everyone else drown in your disgusting vomit your constantly letting out of your mouth.

!rant

So this year I had a subject at university called "Linux internal architecture", and for the last assignment I had to write a kernel module and interact with it with a separate program written in C.

Once I had finished and tested the driver, I went on to write the other program, which was supposed to use system calls to read and write data to the module. While debugging this program (~500 lines of code) I reached the level of frustration where you just start printing absurd messages everywhere in your code to see what's wrong. So for example instead of printing "This error happened in this function", my error messages were more like "Fuck this fucking function it doesn't fucking work".

Guess who forgot to delete all those messages before sending the code to the teacher...

Also, if a specific mode is selected, the program enters a while(1) that, apart from doing what it's expected to do, also creates a file in the user's home directory called something like 'motherfucker' and appends the words 'fuck this shit' to it. INFINITELY.

I really really hope this teacher doesn't try to run the program in his own computer, or he's in for a big surprise.

Real university assignment:

"Write an AI to win this 2player game, restrictions: you cannot save to a file and every turn is a new run of the program."

And then people ask me why do i keep saying university is useless.

Had devRant installed for a while now and finally have something worth sharing.

This happened in my last Python lab at uni:
Me: *Working away at this week's assignment*
Dude next to me: You know last week's assignment?
Me: Yes?
Dude: Did you test you solutions to the exercises?
Me: Yes
Dude: Oh, I didn't. Do you think I'll lose marks?
Me: Yes

I can only hope I'm not forced to work with this guy on group assignments...

You know you're a programmer when:

Devrant api for data warehouse school assignment, yay or nay?

Someone paid me almost 200 usd to solve a visual basic assignment made of 13 small questions like palindrome checking, finding max,...

i feel i stole the girls money but i also feel i wish i can do this full time

I go to college online and I was really excited to start my classes for my major as I finally wrapped up general ed classes. This is a week 1 assignment for Introduction to Computer Science....

Had to do an assignment in Haskell and had some bugs all over the way. After some Wodka I did a one liner that worked but I never found out why. 10/10 would do again

Got the best compliment on an interview :3

Submitted a coding take home assignment. Was told by the tech lead that the code looked like they wrote it themselves! There was nothing they would change in terms of style or approach :3

Sometimes when you get an assignment you just can't help and look at like this

I have to learn for loops AGAIN. Oh well, it was a fun assignment.

So I started new job, full js dev but new project requires python backend. 0 prior python exp but ready to lean and learn. Got my first assignment. Supportive coworkers made me a death clock counter

if (thing = anotherThing)

I think we've all made this mistake at some point..

When your coding in a web design class and your assignment is due tomorrow.

This was my graphic design assignment, what do you guys think?

Assignment != Condition

Throwback to my first assignment in MATLAB.
Still gives me the heebie-jeebies!

When your prof gives you 9/10 on your CS assignment because, instead of returning an int and doing a comparison, you do the comparison and return a boolean.

🤔😑 u serious man

Me - I am sorry my dog eats my homework

Comp sci professor - your dog eat your coding assignment?

Me - ...

Professor - ...

Me - it took him couple bytes

Worst: The guy gave me 5 minutes to code a given assignment on paper. I did all the logic and told him I was missing a function whose name I would just Google. He told me I can't always Google. Well... I won't be coding on paper either.

Best: I was given the assignment to clone a part of a production site. Assignment was intended for 3 days and I was given 5 hours. Completition wasn't important, only structure and coding style counted. I cloned everything and even added new features.

You just can't always be in the zone. I hope more interviewers would take that into account and design better questions.

I was working on windows before, had to do an assignment for a course.
And was stuck on....visual studio python compiler not working.
So I decided to do this.

*working on a programming assignment for a graduate-level course*

"We will provide you code that implements the protocol in the server. You do not need to touch this code."

*provided file has syntax errors, including a block comment which doesn't close before EOF*

Biggest problem I've encountered as a 100% self-taught programmer in an internship: Having no idea the meaning of half the words my boss uses when explaining my assignment... I always called most of them "that thingy that does the thing" XD

The assignment needed me to implement a class that behaves like a vector<int>. I tried the obvious hack not expecting it to work, but surprisingly it did.

This company's coding challenge feels like one annoying assignment.

I legit wonder if I'm doing somebody's homework. 😕

"The time spent on the assignment should not exceed 8 hours."

nice, so a full working day just for an interview take home task

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

If you type "12oatmeal" in one of my school assignment console games, it plays a beep.
V e r y u s e f u l ™

Why are computer science lecturers so fucking incompetent?

Just give the bloody assignment in a way that makes sense and make sure the that your own code is correct.

FUCK

Nothing irks me more than when I sit down with a fellow student and try to help them with a programming assignment that I’ve already completed and after clearly explaining everything to them they just say “Can I take a picture of your code?”. Uhm... no. Fuck you.

Decided to take three different programming language classes in the same semester. Advanced Java, C++, and HTML/CSS/JavaScript. Wouldn’t have been so bad if I didn’t have an assignment due in each every week.

Found out other team's project result about performance for uni assignment. It's that Matlab is the fastest, followed by python and C++ is the slowest.

They are gonna get roasted during presentation (by many people in the audience including me).
This is gonna be fun.
/*devilish grin*/

Finish programming assignment.

Jump right into 10 page paper with auto correct/spell/grammar check turned off (technical paper, office tries to correct issues that aren't issues).

Finish paper, turn checks back on.

Realize ended all sentences with semicolons.

FML.

Aah the feeling of going back home after finishing your assignment

The moment when all your tests cases for the first assignment of the term pass, your code is refactored and have adequate comments but you only get a 52/100 because your marker says your code is not "elegant enough" as a feedback.

Yeah, those were his exact words with no specific context or reasons. He didn't even explain when I went to him for explanations. I don't mind a bad grade, I could be wrong and that is fine.

#rantend

So I had to partition my mac and add windows on it for an assignment... I feel so dirty!!!

So I need to "fix" a false-positive security warning (mass-assignment of a foreign key). Do I "fix" it by...

A) Setting it manually and double-saving the object?
B) Rewriting the mass-assignment so the linter doesn't realize what I'm doing?

Both options suck.
But security is going to complain if I don't do it.

Guess what?
I'm not doing it.

SMD you ducks.

Overconfident cocky freshman studying a 300 level AI course, now pulling off an all nighter for an assignment due the next day which I still have no idea how to complete. FML

Got an assignment for my OOP class, looked at it, laughed, "haha this is baby stuff I could code this by farting on the keyboard"
Wrote 400 lines of code without debugging
🙃.... Why do I do this to myself?

Let's call my college colleague Andrew.

Andrew knows that we have a really tight deadline to complete 2 different assignments to deliver in the same weekend for evaluation.

Andrew says that we really knows about coding, although we doesn't understand the most basic principles about OOP (like encapsulation, for example).

Whenever I asked for help, Andrew said that is "going to do some research" and that what I'm asking is "really hard". He then asked every single other group if then could provide him, with some code so he could "understand" what I asked him to do.

Once they said "no" he would come and tell me he really tried but hadn't be able to do it, 2 days after needed it, delaying the whole project.

Don't be like Andrew.

Got yelled at because super important feature for a client was two days overdue.
The kicker is that they never even talked to IT about the feature let alone give us a decent spec/assignment.

So I guess my most unrealistic deadline was the day before yesterday...

My friend ha just big exam in their programming class. They got the assignment week before and were allowed to use libraries. They were using Java and Maven repos. He created his own Maven repo and added finished assignment as a library. He just added his repo to the gradle project and selected his library as a dependecy. He then created one class with main method, 10 lines of user input and called main method from his library. Since the school newly tests students work automatically, he instantly passed with 100% and had to look like hes actually working for next 3 hours 😂. Noone noticed anything after 2 weeks 😂

A recruiter sent this assignment for assessment!

Why why!!!why u do this!!!

So... I had this assignment. I was chill, had plenty of time, so I wasted hours playing videogames and also spent some learning programming. Then, at 3 am, after spending 2 hours leveling my first character in runescape, I gaze through the clock on my pc and notice the date was the 9th, the assignment was due tomorrow! SHIT

I RUSHED TO WORK AND SPENT THE WHOLE NIGHT CODING (it was for a programming class I took at the uni) HOURS OF HOURS OF STUPID MISTAKES MADE OUT OF SLEEPYNESS.

Until I made it.

I send the assignment, everything is cool. I watch the clock a last time before going to bed and fuck! The clock was in mm/dd/yyyy format! Don't know how the fuck it changed itself and how the fuck I didn't notice there was something wrong with the date. I still had 5 days remaining :(

May I request the world to get their shit together and choose just one global date format?

PS: my normal date format is dd/mm/yyyy

2 college assignment,
3 Task at board,

decided to sleep

After talk to the professor I'm working for

Professor: well, take a break.

Me: take a break? I have to report to you next week during spring break and you just released an assignment.

Professor: well but you have three weeks for the assignment.

Me: inside: but you said start early on the assignment

Professor: take a break

That sinking feeling of horror when you are helping a student with a problem in their assignment only to see major logic errors that prove they dont actually understand what they are doing. * drinks wiskey in prep for marking *

I really don't understand why my university thinks "Oh yeah, make the super easy python assignment that can be finished in 1 hour (max) using basic logic, syntax, and file I/O a 3-person group assignment, there's definitely not going to be just one guy writing code while the others free-ride and get an easy grade."

Intermediate programming exam today(in Java):
5 min before the exam started the guy next to me :"Hey can you tell me what a lambda-expression is? And why do we need streams? "
According to the assignment description you actually had to solve nearly every assignment with lambdas and the stream API.

Sorry mate.

I was given a take-home assignment during the interview process of a startup.
They gave me a vague 24 hours to complete it and submit it the day after.
The instructions read like - most candidates don't complete the assignment, so if you finish 70%-80%, that's good enough.
I read the instructions; I was supposed to follow the "mock design" they sent me. It looked a tad bit ridiculous. But still, I thought I'd be able to finish most of it.

I worked on it for around 10-12hrs total (including procrastination because it was such a slog). I finished most of the "features" they mentioned, so about 70%-80% done.
I submitted it the next day. They got back to me saying they're not moving forward because they expected more features considering 24 hours.
🤨
They didn't expect me to spend 24hrs on it, did they?
I learned a few things, so I guess it wasn't a complete waste of time.

Public test of an assignment I had to do

So recently I have this course called Operating Systems and we used putty to connect to a linux server. An assignment was given to fork a child and pass the message through all the children and all that good stuff. The assignment wasn't the hard part, its to deal with the fact that some people just orphan their children. The server is on the verge of death at this point. So.many.tasks.running. Can I wall and tell them to kill their processes ~_~

So here I am again. Writing my final assignment for the first 2/3 of my bachelor's degree. After 9 hours of constant writing yesterday, it's an understatement to say that the motivation is low.

Someone asked me to help him with his assignment and this happened.. trust me I'm not drunk
"mid ka next" means "next of mid"

Downloaded SQL assigment
Scroll fown to find the tables and the data
A table with the worst font to use

At the University, Algorithms class, exercises lesson..the assistant explaining the results of an assignment:

"Because here..if we use a classic 'if-else' loop..."

😳

So I just realized we submitted an Android assignment containing a notification with a bunch of swear words ! The submission closed a week ago...
Here's to hoping they have a good sense of humor!..
*Awkward laugh and smile*

Disadvantages of coding after midnight... Was modifying a makefile for an assignment when suddenly:

$ make clean
> rm -f com/package1/*.class
> rm -f com/package2/*.java

wait..
WAIT NO
😢

I lost points for not including the following comment:

//Declaring variables
int foo, bar;

I already knew how to code, and I completed the assignment in the fewest number of lines needed while still being well commented explaining my logic. I lost points because I didn't say what everyone understood.

Assignment release: this is a basic assignment that is supposed to help you understand the basics of memory allocation. You are free to use any design you want, however you can implement more advanced features that would lean towards specific designs. What will be punished is that you don't have a dynamic memory allocator. We will run the tests for these offline after the deadline

2 days before the deadline: we released the tests for checking whether you're allocating memory dynamically, but these tests also check for this specific design. So fuck you for choosing any other design than this one. Have fun on sleepless nights.

Fuck me, I guess, for worthlessly working on a different design than they wished for, but didn't specifically ask for from the beginning. I just wasted 2 weeks of my life and feel unmotivated af to do anything anymore regarding this. Fuck this shit. Fuck them. Fuck this course.

Not a question per se but an assignment -

Design an application that could find logs between two timestamps where the logs are stored in 10000 files, each with a file size of ~16GB.

For an entry level position this was a really good and interesting problem to solve.

I bring you all another gem from my computer science course, this time from my OOP class.

The first assignment we made for this class was a simple CLI shop, where you would have basically three main classes:

- A Product class that you extend to create different types of products.
- A Cart class that manages a list of products (basically an ArrayList<Product>) and has some useful methods
- A CLI class to display a simple interface to the user and call methods on a Cart.

Basic OOP stuff, so far so good.

Then for our second assignment the teacher asked us to make Cart a generic class, where you would say Cart<Bagel> and you would only be able to put bagels in it. This makes absolutely no fucking sense, this is not a good use case for generic types since

1) you would never limit your customer's cart to one type of product at compile time.
2) in Cart, you have to cast the generic type to Product to extract any information from the product, like when getting product prices to calculate the total price, so might as well use a fucking ArrayList<Product>

I'm just saying what he's asking us to do has (to our fictional shop's business logic) absolutely no advantage over subtyping.

Also, why the fuck teach generic constraints when you can just tell your students "just cast T to Product", right?

Like fucking hell, couldn't you spend like 10min to come up with a decent assignment that actually teaches generic types the right way? ffs

And just so no one can say "but wut simple assignment would you give to teach students generic types?", here's a simple and much, much better alternative: implementing your own ArrayList. Done. Can't get much better than that, it's a legit use case and teaches you the basics.

Sorry man, you're a great person, you really are, but you suck as a teacher.

Well... I once accidentally deleted a classmates entire assignment. Basically we were working together on one and we had the code in Github, I had named the repo after the module code.
He was having some weird git issues and I thought it would be easier to just delete and re-clone on his machine. You can probably see where this is going.

Me: rm -rf <DIR NAME> Enter
Him: wait, which folder did you just delete

Turns out he had the repo cloned inside another directory with the EXACT SAME NAME, which also contained his previous assignment, the only copy of it in the entire universe (it was a group project and they did it all on his laptop with no source control, which i found hilarious).
It wasnt so bad since that assignment was already submitted and graded, but a bit of a fail on both our parts.

Interviewed for a company that needed help with an Ecommerce website, after which I was given a take home assignment to create a small web page displaying books from a DB.

The instructions specifically said to write it in any language or even pseudocode... Upon turning in the working solution I was rejected for not picking their current Ecommerce framework.

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. Clearly they forgot to list "mind reader" in the job description...

Just finished an assignment yesterday where we had to code a math problem in assembler in under 20 lines

looking at the task: Hey, we already did this in Python

*building own modulo Operation for that cause we cant use it*

*freaking out when realizing it's just not posibble in 20 lines*

Then scrolling up the wikipedia page to see you've spend hours trying to implement the wrong thing

Group assignment in a software engineering class. Got that notorious lazy kid in my group of four who failed the class in the last term. I was perfectly aware of his reputation, but accepted him in the group nonetheless, because he already knows what needs to be done in the class.

He started to work on his assignment: mostly boilerplate code that didn't even build. He didn't even bother to fix it. I had a lot of time over the Easter weekend, so I decided to just code as much for the assignment as possible for the mid-term submission. I replaced his broken boilerplate stuff with a working solution. I told the others in the group chat about it. Code works and builds, test coverage is high. Everything is fine.

The lazy kid replied to the group chat, that if I'd wanted to code and document(!) everything on my own, I should have told him in the first place. Also got that "fuck off" emoji in the message. So I restored his broken boilerplate stuff using git, even fixed the build errors and told him to explain to me what he tried to achieve, and that I'd be happy to include his code as soon as it worked. Didn't hear anything since. Commits neither.

I guess he was just looking for an excuse for not doing additional work in the project.

So my friend who is currently attending University to major in Computer Science just started programming Java a few days ago. His first assignment was to learn bubble sort and make it organize a table of certain values provided in the assignment with a few other items on the side. Apparently, he was stressing over the assignment and waited till the last night to do this, and was running on 2 hours of sleep. Anyways, a few days pass and he received a 0% on the assignment with the comment "See me on Monday." and questioned what he did wrong (They use GitHub to submit their assignments, even though other classes at the University just commit to the University Server for Computer Science), and asked me to review the code. When I started looking at the code, all he managed to do was just make two tables, one that would print the unsorted table, and then print the "sorted" table. Plus, the catch that got him in trouble, he named his package "fuckthisshit", how does one not realize that when they're submitting their assignments... like seriously? Like I can understand the 2 hours of sleep, but with 1000s of examples out there, how do you manage to fake bubble sort plus end up naming a package "fuckthisshit" and question why he got a 0%. I do feel bad for him in the long run since there aren't many assignments in this class so this was worth 25%.

My assignment is late because Jenkins ate my source code.

I feel like this one homework assignment taught me more about computer science than 2 learning years on my own.

I have an assignment due in 42h and I didn't even start, so probably soon.

My reward for understanding this thing is an early night. Time for bed :) remind me not to submit this assignment with the comments still in it. As I have done before.

Headhunter called about a rejection for an assignment I did:

Assignment had malformed data examples
Assignment had unrealistic timespan for completion
Assignment used item stocks for a shop setup
Assignment didn't use any prices just item stocks

Who builds a webshop without prices in the first place?

So done with this job hunting assessment bullshit.

When there are employers that assign you a "test" (low payment) to prove your skills and after you successfully deliver it, he wants to "test" you on another assignment...

Just started using GitHub for my Uni assignment. Summer is coming up and I hope to get a lot more green on here with some projects.

Today's assignment made @safiullah lose his mind.He literally wrote:

void someFunc(int x)
{
x = x ;
}

Just my luck.

Step 1: Get given university assignment.
Step 2: Scrape for latest movie reviews with provided API.
Step 3: Accidentally spoil Star Wars.

So I had this assignment for a subject at University about semaphores in C. The theme was "Friend's dinner out" and it had 3 entities and yadda yadda...

The innocent me made this montage of a chef (one of the entities) with a semaphore in his hand and put it in the first page of the report for that assignment.

Until this point, all ok, or so I thought...

The moment I show my report to my friends they burst out laughing and say I literally just created a meme and sent it to a "not so cool" teacher.
They find it hilarious.

Right now I'm nervously waiting for the assignment grades to be published.

Did I screw up my report and thus my assignment?

The internet: “hey - I need help with my assignment”

Me: “sit down and work through it - and if you can’t... get a better teacher”

I'm a 18 year old student doing IT Management and ATM I have group assignment that the group wants me to do alone, its not even 8 AM and I'm already drinking a double espresso and I'm very close to getting a beer

!rant

University assignment asks to create some encryption harder to break than Caesar Cypher. So I decided to go online and look for some tips on making a somewhat decent algorithm.

Universal answer: don't do it

😶

Well then, night off I guess 😎

Variable assignment as declaration is stupid. Looking at you, Python 😑

You can never be sure whether you accidentally overwrite a previous value and you have to fuck around with global because it doesn't know what's an assignment to a global var and what's a declaration. It's just not as satisfying as doing it explicitly and only leads to errors

How to complete an assignment?
Easy:Wait till the last moment. And bam... just like that its there.

So my friend who's learning to program didn't really feel like he accomplished much in a uni assignment since he googled most stuff, copy-pasted and tweaked the code a bit. When I told him that's actually the way we do things he found it the funniest thing ever.

Just got rejected for BS reasons after handing in an assignment. Just tell me you found someone better, it's not a crime.

My colleague just did a commit with random method additions to the models classes in order to show to our teacher that he did "something".

This makes me cringe.

Getting my first ever second dev interview for a Node.js fullstack role next week(First interview wasn't technical, they gave a coding assignment which I passed)!

What should I expect? Any tips?

After 3 tech rounds and an assignment submission they finally offered me a job.
ME: I am so excited to be part of...errr do you guys work on Saturdays ?
HR: Yes! we have kept Saturdays as our hack/discussion da...
ME: See you never!!!

A buddy of mine sent this to me from a first year procedural programming course.
The email was in regards to an assignment where they had to print some statistics. The caps letters are the response from the lecturer...
Integers with decimal places hey?

This is why you don't use globals..

A recruiter contacted me regarding Django Framework and asked me to complete one assignment in REST Framework as a recruitment process.

Haven't heard from them since then.

My biggest programming pet peeve: The code throws a series of unchecked assignment errors and yet it compiles.

Go home Intellij you need some sleep.

I've spent the last 10 days on an assignment for an interview. Instead of starting with the requirements right away I decided to fiddle around and tried to add typescript but got stuck for 3 days. Now I just need to write the docs and final PR description but I'm feeling really burn out. I'll be rejected if the code is shitty, and that thought made me try harder. But when I tried harder, in the back of my head I thought "What if I'm still rejected after trying so hard?" and that kills my motivation. I'll just get it done tomorrow. Next week I have another assignment, I'm using chatgpt for that one.

Found my first programming assignment. Wrote this 5 years ago.
Can't believe I did this. 😂

Obviously, I overdid it with the assembly study assignment this morning - just tried to bit-mask a variable using "andi". In C#.

i don't understand how to do my assignment at work. i don't ask anyone. and i'm crying. gonna get fired soon lol

Starting a hackathon with getting the assignment and then replying with: there is a library for that

My first django website going into dev environment. (Management portal for company's license management)
I know there will be a river of bugs but, still I'm happy.
Also, this was the first assignment on my first job.

Got an assignment last year to use a buffer overflow to "hack" a series of problems within some kind of assembly code. There were 2 required problems, but 6 in total. I completed all 7 (one hidden bonus problem).

The teacher that gave that assignment ended up writing me a letter of recommendation for my masters program

Ok.. So I applied for a web dev position at a small-to-medium sized company. They had a telephonic round which they were happy with. They then sent out an assignment for me (A simple webapp to complete in 1hr). I did it and sent them the code. Finally, the face to face interview also went well.

At the end of it all, the HR comes back and tells me - "You did not use a MVC framework for the assignment and your code was not optimized for unit testing."

Me - "Ugh. (1) You did not have to call me for the face to face interview if you did not like my code. (2) You specified NOT to use any 3rd party libraries when doing the assignment. (3) You can tell people directly that you cannot afford them."

One of biggest epiphanies came through this fundamental critique in SICP of the assignment operator. Through years of imperative programming it seems so innocent, doesn't it? But that you lose referential transparency, run into the alias problem and fundamental difficulty to determine object equality (or of their instances) - that was kind of eye opening considering all the pain I had already experienced with state in concurrency.
(It led me so far to think it's an ontological issue, that even in the discrete computing universe we have not come so much further than Zenon's paradoxa on change.)

I think the walrus operator (:=) in the new python version 3.8 should've been integrated with the assignment operator. I don't think it needs a special name as it just makes it more complex than it is; a damn assignment statement in the middle of an expression.

If you're going to submit an assignment late, can you at least *read* the assignment? Literally wasting both of our times'

I was failing all the test cases for a CS assignment where we had to implement our own methods for strings in C++. After an hour of debugging, turns out strings don’t end with ‘/0’ in C++ like in C.
Fuck my life.

tldr: my classmates suck and I hate them
We study cs in school, and my classmates are super dumb.
Here is an example from today:
The task: build an http server in python, using sockets.

My classmates: writes everything in the main function, uses try-expect for everything and every error possible, nothing works, nothing worked after a week.
Me: properly separated to different functions, used goddam regrx to get data from requests, used asyncio to make sure it can handle multiple requests at the same time, everything worked after 2 hours.

But, and here is the problem, after I finish they ask me a bunch of dumb, 'Just Google it dude' questions and they call me condescending because I get mad after the second hour of teaching them the same thing.
Once they told me:"you think you are a better programmer then us" and I just want to say this out loud: I AM A BETTER PROGRAMMER THEN THEM, THEY ARE THE PERFECT EXAMPLE OF HOW YOU SHOULDN'T DO ANYTHING AND I HATE THEM.
That's it, I'm done. I feel much better now.
PS: it's okay to suck at programming, but please stop thinking that everyone who's better than you is condescending.

When you get back from an on site assignment and find out that everything cool you had previously worked on is now given to someone else to do.

Was bored af with assignment at hand. So just went ahead and wrote a class to implement Eat. Sleep. Code. Repeat. XD

Being a linux user, writing a college assignment on Debian operating system, while being on a debian system, studying never felt so good before.

Funny story...
Got a small college assignment based on Java and Cassandra(database). The database shell was running fine. Spent 5 days removing the random java exceptions and working on the basic connectivity, searched everywhere on Stack overflow and other forums for solutions and still no help.
So, I decided to write a program that would print only the output as I knew what would be the output when it will run. Took a screenshot of it and made up a cover story to tell my professor that I did it on a friend's computer.
But while I was taking a screenshot of the Eclipse with code window and output window, some random syntax errors popped up.(but they weren't syntax error).
So I created a new project and copied the pom.xml file and the code into the new one(I tried this one before and it didn't work). And there were no errors. So I took a screenshot of it with output of different file and opened a different file.

But then, don't know what came across my mind and I clicked on run just to see if this works, and it worked fine. And now I'm like.. WTF JUST HAPPENED!!

I'm having some problems with an assignment for university, the special forces are trying to help me

My lecturer gave us a piece of very buggy software with no API which we use to model computer networks. It literally says in the assignment specification "Your program must run for at least 60 seconds before crashing."

These people are setting us up for failure.

Please stop, stop now...

(BTW, assignment statement was on one line, I added breaks just so I could fit it into a screenshot)

If the text is too blurry:

int index;
string fileNameWithoutExt;
additionalData.MailImportConfigCode = (fileNameWithoutExt = schema.Remove(schema.LastIndexOf('.'))).Substring((index = fileNameWithoutExt.LastIndexOf('.') + 1), fileNameWithoutExt.Length - index);
}

Client Of The Day : Hi, I would like to have a website. I went to an agency but are too expensive for me. Can you do me this website for less than €150 ($170) ?
Me : -_-

So, question. What is your minimum for a freelance assignment ?

I like how one of my programming lecturers had never even heard of JSON before I asked whether I can use it in the assignment. In her defence (I guess), it wasn't a web dev class, but still how did she never come across JSON in her entire life?

I just want this week to be over so I can focus on coding =\.

Screw final exams, final research paper, final presentation, and final unit assignment.

I’m terrible at procrastination on things that don’t interest me and my fingers itch to minimize PowerPoint and maximize VS

Every assignment is done by reference in JavaScript... like why? Lemme use a pointer when I need it.
ES2016 looks so much like Java, I swear nobody will notice if they added pointers... and over 9000 more confusing features.

Designing with "real" data

In Interaction Design Uni i've got this assignment to design a prototype for an "Ebay for used books". A requirement is that we have use "real" Data and not lorem ipsum for our design prototype tools. Which is a fair point but....

It's about 50 book categories (crime, history, romance) we have to cover, and for every category the prof wants at least 2 Books.

I've don't have the time to type in the (meta)data for 100 books at 30 JSON properties by hand. What would be your advice?

Do you maybe know a easy to use online bookshop API? (remember I'm a tech savy designer not a dev)

Or do you know someone in a low income country who does data entry? Or any experience with hiring someone on fiverr?

Thank you for your help. :)

Trying and failing repeatedly to code up a gaussian blur function in delphi for a university computer graphics module assignment.

Over 5 days I re-create the code so many times I lost count. I think I managed to sneak 9 hrs of sleep in total for that week.

Good times...

Feels like such a waste of my talents when I need to solve someone elses coding problem that someone is doing for a school assignment in their first term

When your friend (who doesn't know how to code) asks you to make them something for an assignment (not cs related) and they say your code is wrong 😒

When you are trying to reverse engineering context free grammar rules from given sentences......
Not possible. Worst assignment yet.

Studying multimedia developer course Class year one learning HTML.
Build this with tables and inline styles....

Assignment was clearly written and you where able to copy past most of it.
I was like fuuu. I build it in CSS and external style sheet.

Time set for assignment 4 days, time used: 3 hours.

This was in 2008......

I hope now for you students out there that it has changed and you are learning proper coding and are correctly challenged

So I traveled for an hour and 30 minutes to go to my school and complete an assignment that is mandatory for being accepted to my study next year. Guess what.. the assignment was writing a python script that prints specific characters of a set string based on user input. Seriously??? print(str[inp1:inp2]) I was done within a minute and got to leave again. 99% of my time was spent sitting in a train wondering what the point of a mandatory assignment in python is when we are only supposed to learn it once the study starts anyway.

So this is about one assignment I had in my first programming class in university, I had a group which had 3 members, one saw the assignment and just quit, the other was always saying, "I Know what we have to do to complete this exercise" and I was like "great, then do it"...
Seconds later he just didn't do anything like "WT* man"

you don't know what true anger is until you have to manually merge a big assignment because your colleague made unreported changes ALL OVER YOUR GODDAMN FILES

I did an coding assignment for a new job... Now they are asking for more code to judge.

Cmon, just change your coding assignment to be enough to judge it...

Our OS instructor gave us a written assignment about concept of Bootstrap, some of my course mates copy about BOOTSTRAP CSS(Front-end) at least 3 pages and the deadline is now

Applying for a new job and got an assignment for a quick dashboard as a test, whoever designed the HTTP client in Angular should be thrown down a fucking building.

The whole class is approaching me to solve the assignment coding problems, in addition to it our professor is changing the way we code as i insisted him. I don't know if this is the result of my past sleepless nights.

Not dev but, enough for the story. Had an assignment to create a hashtable for my DS course. Asked a friend how he managed resizing and the load factor
Friend= tablesize*50
Me= what...
Friend= space complexity what...

Using Java for the first time for a homework assignment in uni, everything ran properly the first time.

Gonna go buy some lottery tickets.

Professor: Where is your coding assignment? Didn't you complete it?

Student: My dog ate my coding assignment.

Professor: How can a dog eat a coding assignment?

Student: My dog started off eating a couple of "bits" of my assignment and didn't realize how did a few "bits" turn into many "bytes".😮

I'm making the assignment in full flexbox, they still using floats tho.

The cringe is never enough.

!dev

I've got so much overdue winter break work that I have to skip celebrating New Year to do math and finish my biology sketches.
Argh.
Hope you guys have a better 2018. Happy New Year, I guess?

During my freshman fall semester in college in my intro to Java class, the professor gives us an assignment and says we need to submit it, so I print it out and try to submit the code on paper. Is it my fault he didn't specify how to turn it in?

Third day at work, still configuring. This is what happens when you make me use windows. Got my first dev assignment today though, so that's fun.

Okay so I’ve been brought in on a 12 month contract as an external replacement integration architect, alongside a large IT consulting firm. Turns out, they don’t need an integration architect. So I fill my time coming up with useful tools around the project that deal with all the missing parts in their MVP: like monitoring tools, data mocking tools, you get the idea. Essentially doodling.

Client has woken up to fact that they’ve overspent by X million, employing 30+‘developers’, 20+ ‘testers’, n+ ‘managers’ on a ‘low-code’ project … result: project shuts 4 months early.

Q: Essentially client wants remaining four months work done in two weeks. Is there a German word for laughing, crying, and banging the forehead on the desk at the same time?

Supplementary: how cross will client be when they realise project can indeed be done, and that consultancy have been emperor’s-new-clothing them for most of the last two years?

(Feel free to perform substitution on quoted terms at your leisure)

RIP my sunday...

Assignment for uni:
Code a decompression routine in cortex m0 assembly for the compression function your teacher provided....

It can't get much worse than that!

Well after 3 days of fighting with C I finally got my assignment done ✅ :D the assignment was simple and would have taken me like 5h max to do in Java( which is my first and most proficient language).

However I was away from class for a while and subsequently had to code the project while teaching myself about C and pointers .🤖

This is why we don’t skip school kids 😄

P.S It surprised me how many other people were in the schools lab at 2AM to push the assignment to the local git 😮

It's Saturday and instead of being home or going out I'm stuck in college with this two trying to learn procedures because of an assignment that I have due tomorrow. What a great way to spend my weekend!

Working on an assignment in Java. Was making a test, but no matter how hard i tried the test would never run. Went through the code several times changing it entirely.

Realized after four hours that it was the test that was wrong, not the code 🙄

Working on an assignment for uni, object oriented programming with Java.

Just spent 40 minutes banging my head against the table because I’m a fucking idiot

EVERY FUCKING VACATIONS I'VE EVER HAD SINCE HIGH SCHOOL, when I first learned to code.
Since then there have always been some school or uni assignment or something croaked in production while I was away and n00bs couldn't hack it.

Hey guys. Was wondering what to do when you're in college and your assignment is to code a physical robot through a maze and half of your team can barely write 'Hello World'.

Took me like an hour to finish the final assignment in a class where each project gets progressively harder. I was shocked, I was like “there’s no way it’s this easy. What did I do wrong”

Turns out the assignment I did was not even for marks, and the actual final assignment is completely different and MUCH more difficult.

Hug!!!!!!

!rant
We got an assignment to build our own website (with HTML, CSS and JS) a few months ago. Now guess who's been procrastinating for around 3 months and has to do it in one day now.

Does anyone have tips on how to avoid procrastination?

I love it when a coding assignment is to take the last assignment and do one thing more optimized !!! 😄😄

All the hard stuff is already done and all I have to do is some optimization that I’ve done before in other languages and just have to implement in this one 😄

So I got an assignment for literature class to make and present some sort of creative project about transcendentalism. Time suggestion: 2-3 hours of work. 10 hours later, I have a videogame with 0 polish that I can convice the professor is about transcendentalism. I regret nothing.

Here we go again...

Here(Kerala) covid cases raising day by day.. Almost like lockdown here.... Back to boring Online classes, heavy assignment, homeworks.... Here we go again...
Just like before....

Btw stay safe and be healthy... Our health is on our hand... Have a nice day❤

f*ck. I hate myself. I could've finished my assignment in 3 hours, and now it f*cking took me 7 hours because I get OCD and I'm too slow to f*cking do it. And I'm still not finished!!

Making sure you can't be fired 101:

The docs for your code should closely resemble that creative writing assignment you turned in a week late in college.

Today, I used a curry function for the first time outside the context of a classroom/assignment, to solve a real-world problem. boy do I love functional programming.

I been doing a online course and they provide a exercise to do in Jupyter notebook.

I notice that the exercise they wanted us to do this time is too complex. After finishing the exercise I submit it for review.

I thought I am doing an exercise but I had actually done an assignment and submit it :(

Lucky I pass that assignment. It is the worst misunderstanding I have done during my student life.

!dev (?)

Why does my teacher think it's reasonable to give an assignment for writing a scientific article about quantum computing in the first semester of CS? Like really? I just got out of fucking high school you bitch, all math I know is basic linear algebra. Thankfully I'm a nerd that likes computers so I got the basis of classical computing covered, I can only imagine how my classmates that never touched a computer are holding up.

*me to myself* okay this time I'm not solving that problem with recursion. The assignment is hard enough already.

*A ton of sweat, blood and hours later* Whoops.

= and ==

Or

:= and =

?

4am writing an assignment about the ethics of anonymity tools (TOR, VPNs, brown bags to put on your head)
I love the subject – I picked it – but these written assignments for peripheral classes are the most soul sucking part of studying software engineering

Submitted my first ever assignment for Computing today 🎉🎉 I'll admit I am surprised how little written code assignments I have on the Programming module though...

Have u ever had a "interview assignment"? If so, how did it go? Just had my first one. Waiting on results. It was using open weather API pulling weather from the (4) states where their offices are located.

I had an interview after clearing they gave me a home assignment that was to be completed using MS workflows. I spent the next 3 days trying to find a useful tutorial to understand what workflow are for but failed to do so.

During a work assignment, I had done my fair share of the assignment so I could enjoy my weekend at a party. Half way through, I find out my group hadn’t even started and didn’t know where to start so I basically spent my weekend on the booze and running to and from my laptop (in a shared room) trying to get this over the line.

First assignment after I learned about if-else-then and for loops: draw swastika with modifiable width variable

We have a 4 months long project where we have to develop some kind of web app. My assignmemt is literally 3 tables in DB, login screen, 3 buttons and one textinput. I've done it in past 4 hours. What a waste of time and effort.

When you get the assignment from the manager to do something that is not permitted in the company ... EXCITING 😎

First rant;

First of all I am an applied computer science student in the second semester.

We've got a few assignments and the first set went fine but this last week boy ohh boy - first of all today I got noticed by one of my two teammates that the other one won't get stuff done in this assignment (he also did next to nothing in the first)
Also the the assignment is unclear and the given methods and parameters don't care about naming conventions (for one method I don't even know what it should do). Also we have to use new liberies (java.io etc.) and learn them on our own so far it would be okay, the time limit is two weeks, also doable
BUT the same chair also made one assignment for web development with the same deadline and also no explanation how to do stuff.

I don't say I am perfect but the expectations are too high, while also studying for other modules

People who use destructuring assignment EVERYWHERE; why you do this to me?

In most cases it does not even reduce code length. Like

{ field } = object
save(field)

Why no just type

save(object.field)

Tis' hard to understand

It's getting on my nerve to constantly change from one programming language to another in one semester. We are learning web development (html css js), functional programming (haskell), speech analysis (matlab) and logical programming (prolog). It's driving me kinda mad having to change the approach for each assignment every few days.

90% of my homework and assignments this week are essays/writing assignment and I can't get the motivation to do them. Programming homework is so much better.

They gave me an assignment.. i completed it... Got hired... Thats it!!

When you're doing a generic programming course, and you're passing shit left and right with flying colors until you hit the one assignment where you have to write in human-speak...

When you remember 15 minutes before class that you were supposed to do Junit tests for your assignment also. Wooopsie.

!rant
C++ / OOP QUESTION

I have a uni assignment / project (Data Structures class), where I have to implement the ins-n-outs of 1D arrays, by creating a dynamically allocated array class, which can accept any type of data (using templates). But there's a problem.

I'd like to implement sorting the elements of the array. But given the fact, that I'm using templates, I cannot treat the elements as integers, nor as strings, or other types...
Also, let's say that the elements of the array are elements of class T, where T looks like this:

class T {
private:
double height;
int age;
string name;
public:
double getH() { return height; }
int getAge() { return age; }
string getName() { return name; }
};

(It's just a random example, pls don't judge for code quality...)

Let's say that I'd like to sort the T elements based on height, print out, sort by age, print out, then sort by name and print out. How can I do this? Is this possible?

I have an assignment where I have to make a language that has a purpose, for example: make sql easier to understand or in my native language.

Do you guys have any ideas?

Who gives out an assignment with a weightage of 6 Marks in total that too for demonstrating GRAPHIC USER INTERFACE? My Cryptography Proff. that’s who.
Why are faculties such bullies considering themselves the kingpins?
😭

I was busy with making an end assignment, and one part just didnt work, it wasnt showing properties or gearslots of the first ninja
Then I checked the database and realised that the only entry that is not correct is the first one.
Doh

I wish someone could sing me a lullaby to sleep coz all I think now is how to solve tomorrow code assignment 😋

Just corrupted all assignment files so that I could send them on time. I'm curious how the professor will react to this.

Actually an IT company took my interview and gave me an assignment and it had to be submitted in 24 hours.. i submitted 50% of it..
And i thought many time but that task was not a work of 1 day.. any suggestions please..

I've been trying to do a programming assignment for such a long time and I can't get my head around it. It's not even that big but I've spent hours trying to understand and make it work. Times like these make you feel so helpless. :/

Seriously wondering why i bought a cheap slow ass laptop for school when i end up doing most of my homework at home anyway.

Android studio runs so fucking slow on it compared to my tower and i cant get this fucking camera assignment to fucking work AAAAAAAAAAAH

Taking a HCI course, our first assignment was to find and analyze an example of bad ui in software,everyday life, and anywhere else

This dude just literally did a presentation on a .docx reading off what he wrote, scrolling down from time to time

High school Career readiness class assignment

I need to interview someone in my chosen future career (computer programmer or ethical hacker) anyone know any companies in Pittsburgh I should look for people at who may be willing to let me talk to them???

Please help

when I get the assignment of debugging my group members uncommented Java Swing application, I seriously have to untangle that mess for days

So I'm working on an assignment for my Computer Science class, and we have to basically compute strings into hash values and then modulo it by 1 million and put it into the hash table. But the value keeps overflowing and turning into negative values, anyone know how I can calculate the key?

(BTW, the hashcode is the same code that is calculated by the .hashCode function in Java)