I've started collecting pictures of my friends!

Confessions of a Programmer

#1
If a client is an unbearable asshole during the initial communication, I look for every excuse to pad on the hours for the estimate to get paid more. If a client goes above and beyond in their douchbaggery, I tack on an additional $40/hour.

#2
Sometimes I will present an elaborate solution to a client, but really I'm just reading off the features of a plugin or library I'm going to download or buy after the call. Not because I can't build it myself, but because I'd rather spend more time on other/my own projects.

#3
Clients assume because I know one language, I know them all. Rather than turning down the work, I take a crash course to work in that language, or outsource the work and clean it up afterwards, whichever is more practical at the time.

#4
I use cPanel on a dedicated to manage our client websites. I'm not paid enough to bother with setting up everything manually.

#5
Certain projects I build have a 3-day backdoor built into it. If the client doesn't pay upon completion, a unique hash triggered as a GET variable deletes a core file in my work, rendering the work useless. If it wasn't triggered by the 4th day, the file allowing me to trigger this backdoor is removed. This is only used for clients where the project must be launched on their servers, or if there has been a previous issue collecting payment.

#6
I slip in the initial contract that all preceeding phone calls will be monitored and recorded, and that they acknowledge the recordings are admissable in court. This has saved me from losing money twice now.

#7
I have never used an IDE. (I know, I know, it's really inefficient and dumb, but I'm just more comfortable with Sublime. Plus I often find myself mobile and without my computer, so I have to program from my phone.)

#8
Each day resembles a betting spectacle of which work will be late, which will be rushed out and which will never see the light of day.

#9
I have used "sick" and "family emergency" as an excuse to just sleep in far more than I can count.

#10
When a client from hell crosses over the line in their conduct (such as getting very nasty and personal, or sending threats), I anonymously report them to the BBB and on RipOffReport.

Relatives: You're a computer guy, right, what are you working on these days?
Me: *should I bother explaining, should I not* Oh, just some stuff.
R: Oh come on, tell us, how difficult can it be?
M: *sigh* I'm working on a custom garbage collector for-
R: !!

They're now under the impression that I'm involved in collecting rubbish from bins. Sigh. My hair doesn't help here, either, lol (I have one of those tangled, unruly mops of hair)

This will take time to explain.

I had just started my new job and deleted 3 years of data that the client had spent over £450,000 collecting 😱

another developer used my PC to quickly access the clients database while I was out the room as I had sql management studio open. I went back to my PC thinking I was connected to my local database, did a few truncate tables to test my software and :0 minutes later I get a call asking why there was no data on the server!

Thank god for backups 😓

After my previous PC bursting into flames when I changed my input voltage to 120v on the power supply my dad never bought me one again this happened when I was aged 12. I was so much in love with computers that I would visit my friends who had ones at home and not leave till their moms asks me to. I remember collecting my lunch money and buying a Pentium 4 mb for dog cheap at a local store and as soon as I plugged in the mb short-circuited and died (I had the other parts as I was scavenging the junk yard for them). I'll never forget the moment I burst into tears seeing my hopes for a PC dieing. So after all the years passing when I was 16 I spent my whole summer vacation working in a construction site doing so much heavy work. There were days that my body couldn't bear and I just fell but somehow by the end of that summer I managed to collect enough money to assemble this 3rd gen dual-core. This is my baby. I'm using it till this date.
**Sorry about the bad English

My current project at work: purchase verification, aka anti-fraud.

It's been two weeks, and my boss is flipping out because it isn't done. A robust anti-fraud solution. in two weeks. And he thought one week was a little much.

like, fucking really?

There are companies whose entire service is helping combat fraud. and he wants this done in a bloody week?

What makes me laugh through my tears of frustration is that the company that moved into the previous office? Yep, anti-fraud. Their entire business model is providing anti-fraud services to other businesses. They even tried selling him on it when they moved in. Bossman sales guy turned it around and sold my freaking desk out from under me instead.

But like. They're a small company: they had 9 people when they moved in, and were looking to add three more, so a total of 12 people. (I totally considered jumping ship, but their stack was too different.)

So. Bossman wants me to replace 9-12 people and their entire business in a fucking week. Yeah.

"Oh, but it's just sms verification" says he. What he also wants is the ability to flag users as fraudulent, have sticky verifications so they can't bypass them by backing out, have email checks as well as sms, have deferred verification to allow collecting required info (e.g. phone number), verification fallback, lockouts, manual admin whitelisting, admin blacklisting, and different rules per merchant and rule groups for affiliates to apply to all of their merchants, and of course the ability to customize those merchant/affiliate anti-fraud rules. But he shortens this gigantic list to "I want sms verification," despite actually asking for all of the above. I don't want to know about the mental gymnastics and/or blindfolding required to equate the two, but he's nuts.

Yeah.
All of that.
In a goddamn week.

And I get chewed out when it isn't done? Fuck off.

Go build me a goddamn 5m ft^2 castle out of basalt and marble using only your toothbrush and a rusty garden trowel, and have it done in a week. No outsourcing.

talk about ridiculous.

I don't even know where to start with this rant!
I haven't paid rent for 3 months now.I haven't paid the WiFi and electricity bills too.Hell, I haven't even paid the fucking college fees and it's almost mid-semester.I have like 100+ other bills I haven't paid.I have exhausted loans from all of my banks and I am at the fucking end now!!!!

What's worse is that some motherfuckers owe me close to 4 million in local currency!!!The project was finished in April and until now they can't fucking pay me because their "CEO has not signed the cheque". Motherfuckers, we were all in the same room when we agreed on the pricing.That half-assed CEO was also there!
What the fuck is wrong with people?WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?????
How many fucking times do I have to come to your stinking shit office to follow up on payments.How many fucking times????How many fucking times do I have to see new V8s parked outside your office yet you claim you still collecting the funds.How many fucking times?!!?
Please fucking pay me!.I fucking need that money stupid.I don't survive on eating flies! FTW!

Finish my Raspberry Pi Zero Cluster... complete with kubernetes, etc.

... I still don't know what I'm going to run on this. suggestions in the comments welcome.

!rant

So last weekend I started collecting hardware for a small scale cluster at home to test scalability of my software. Making some decent progress.

Tomorrow I will replace the switch and this weekend I will set up storage so I can start my first application

Less rant, more story.

Tl;Dr: Disney uses "Magic Bands" to track every action of every person within their parks.

So I took my family to Disney World this past summer and we got these "nifty" little things called Magic Bands. These things are little wrist devices that basically handle everything for you in the parks. It unlocks your resort room, it gets you into the parks, you pay for meals and souvenirs with it by connecting a credit card and/or your meal plan. It makes things real simple as it's like putting on your watch each day.

At first I kinda enjoyed how easy it made everything on the trip, but then as we were exiting a ride the couple in front of us noticed the digital signs had their names on them, I looked around and noticed mine too, a sign that said "have a good day $myName." It suddenly clicked. These "Magic Bands" are people trackers. Suddenly everything about the park that I had been enjoying, was part of the system they had in place using these bands as human cattle tags. The ride wait time estimations were perfect, not because of a good algorithm and estimations, but because they had actual real data telling them when a person entered the line and got off the ride.

Using a BLE scanner app I was able to see that they have hundreds of APs throughout the parks tracking every single band on every single person withing their compound. I started to think about all of the data they're collecting and the thought of it was overwhelming. The amount of assumptions they can make about people based on their actions within their parks and what that data would be worth to additional advertisers. By the end of the trip I was cynically pointing out everything to my family about the cattle tags and how much I hated wearing it and yet it was required in order to do anything.

My first internship was unpaid. "For the experience" and shit. My first task was to clear out an entire office full to the literal ceiling with the phones of people who had been laid off or quit. There were now just three old guys in the entire office. And me. Go figure. I need to find that picture, it's truly unbelievable.
My next task was to sort cables in the store room. Mind you, this was supposed to be a software dev internship.

I consistently had to ASK for work to do. If I didn't, I would just sit in my new office all day doing homework and playing with linux liveCDs and nobody cared.

So the third task they gave me was to try to restore a very old (like XP old) computer that had a broken hard drive, literally broken. Said they wanted to "repurpose it." As busy work I guess.

So I scrounged around the cleptomaniacal cesspool of dated and neglected tech and found a hard drive. Pop it in, chkdsk, fdisk, good to go. Spend hours installing XP while sorting more random cables and doing my homework because honestly writing a history paper is more valuable to my dev career than this complete bullshit. Finally get the thing working and go to report the miracle of rebirth to my higher-up. He says "oh cool," doesn't smile, and hands me a list of software to install.

I come back 20 minutes later - "Hey, most of these require corporate licenses."

Guy says "yup" and goes back to ignoring me. Never gives me a company card to buy licenses, or a list of ones already bought. I've revived the computer equivalent of Moses from the computer equivalent of permadeath just for this asshole to completely disregard that and give me an(other) impossible task, just to get me off his back. Excuse me for imposing with free (then-child) labor, you ass.
I spend maybe another week there doing homework in the office I cleaned and contemplating stealing everything of value. I guarantee they wouldn't have noticed though, which somehow made the idea less appealing.

I quit by texting my boss.

He never replied.

I wish I had stolen their laptop RAM.
It's probably still sitting on boss's shelf collecting dust and being a miserable, outdated fucking waste of space, just like him and his two remaining coworkers.

Boyz, I don't feel like Windows 10 is collecting enough information from me. What can I do about this? I want to give everything to Microsoft <3

WIP - Scarlet Witch project
AKA me collecting/cleaning/processing data while someone else will get the glory 😂

Okay so my weekend project went well :D put my retropie system inside of this old r2d2 I've had collecting dust. Has a cooling fan inside as well as a 16x2 lcd I was playing with. Got a red led tied to the rpis txd pin, ports in the front for easy access and power cord and hdmi coming out the back.

So I've been reading a lot about this #deletefacebook trend across devrant lately. And frankly I'm a little concerned.

As per my understanding, everyone wants to delete Facebook because they're harvesting data. Learning more about us.

While I would agree that I want my privacy. I am a little surprised at how fast this trend is picking up. People are turning a blind eye on everything else they do online just to assume they have privacy.

Let's put this Into perspective, shall we?

You are afraid of letting Facebook harvest your data yet you watch videos on YouTube which is owned by Google. You may even proceed to removing your Google account and use a stripped down version of Chromium to protect yourself from these companies yet you're using a Windows, Mac, iPhone, or Android all of which may be harvesting your data behind the scenes. Some may argue that they have stripped down their android phones but don't take into consideration that you are still using apps on your phone that may be collecting your data.

Let's say that you manage to get out of every sort of technology, you should remember that companies like Facebook also check data about you through your friends.

You use platforms like DuckduckGo assuming that they might not be collecting data about you in some way. I don't think there is anyway for you to prove that these privacy companies don't collect our data.

I don't know why everyone seems to be interested in this trend. I absolutely don't see a point in it. If anything, things I see are super relevant to me.

I'd actually like to send some devRanters Christmas cards but that would involve me getting their addresses and I get those privacy concerns + some people would say I'm slowly collecting addresses...

Any suggestions?

I worked for over 13 hours yesterday on super-urgent projects. I got so much done it's insane.

Projects:
1) the printer auto-configuration script.
2) changing Stripe from test mode to live mode in production
3) website responsiveness

I finished two within five minutes and pushed to both QA and Production. actually urgent, actually necessary. Easy change.

The printer auto-configure script was honestly fun to write, if very involved. However, the APIs I needed to call to fetch data, create a printer client, etc... none of them were tested, and they were _all_ broken in at least two ways. The CTO (api guy in my previous rant) was slow at fixing them, so getting the APIs working took literally four hours. One of them (test print) still doesn't work.

Responsiveness... this was my first time making a website responsive. Ever. Also, one of the pages I needed to style was very complicated (nested fixed-aspect-ratio + flexbox); I ended up duplicating the markup and hacking the styling together just to make it work. The code is horrible. But! "Friday's the day! it's going live and we're pushing traffic to it!" So, I invested a lot of time and energy into making it ready and as pretty as I could, and finally got it working. That page alone took me two hours.

The site and the printer script (and obv the Stripe change as well) absolutely needed to be done by this morning. Super important.

well.

1) Auto-configure script. Ostensibly we would have an intern come in and configure the printers. However, we have no printers that need configuring, so she did marketing instead. :/ Also, the docs Epson sent us only work for the T88V printer (we have exactly one, which we happened to set up and connect to). They do not work for the T88VI printers, which is what we ordered. and all we'll ever be ordering. So. :/ I'll need to rewrite a large chunk of my code to make this work. Joy :/

2) Stripe Live mode. Nobody even seemed to notice that we were collecting info in Test mode, or that I fixed it. so. um. :/

3) Responsiveness.
Well. That deadline is actually next Wednesday. The marketing won't even start until then, and I haven't even been given the final changes yet (like come on). Also! I asked for a QA review last night before I'd push it to production. One person glanced at it. Nobody else cared. Nobody else cared enough to look in the morning, either, so it's still on QA. Super-important deadline indeed. :/

Honestly?

I feel like Alice (from Dilbert) after she worked frantically on urgent projects that ended up just being cancelled. (That one where Wally smells that lovely buttery-popcorn scent of unnecessary work.)

I worked 13 hours yesterday.
for nothing.

fucking. hell.

In this episode of "office drama", we have the head secretary asking me if I want to contribute to the gift for the baby of some guy I don't know well. (I'm new to the office btw)
When I refuse, saying that I don't know him well enough to want to contribute, she says "that's okay, but we won't be collecting for a gift for you once you have a baby. We want to be a '''team''' ".

😐

I just said "that's fair", but maaaaaaaan! Since when is it okay to demand that someone participates in a gift, while ignoring their social or financial circumstances? 😤

Update: went to her office to talk about this "being a part of the team" and clear things up. She said, and I quote "I don't have time for this". And by that, swords have been unsheathed. I guess there is no pleasing some people.

$ sudo apt install happiness
Collecting happiness

Error : no happiness package found for your system

$ sudo apt uninstall problems

Error : even sudo can't remove your problems from your system

WAIT !!!! WHAT???

I know xiaomi, you must be collecting a lot of personal data but this just sounds wrong on so many levels

Can someone explain to me why the fuck I should even care about the fact, that some companies collect, use and sell my data? I'm not famous, I'm not a politician and I'm not a criminal, I think most of us aren't and won't ever be. We aren't important. So what is this whole bullshittery all about? I seriously don't get it and I find it somewhat weird that especially tech guys and IT "experts" in the media constantly just make up these overly creepy scenarios about big unsafe data collecting companies "stealing" your "private" information. Welcome to the internet, now get the fuck over it or just don't be online. It's your choice, not their's.

I honestly think, some of these "security" companies and "experts" are just making this whole thing bigger than it actually is, because it's a damn good selling point. You can tell people that your app is safe and they'll believe you and buy your shit app because they don't understand and don't care what "safe" or "unsafe" means in this context. They just want to be secure against these "evil monster" companies. The same companies, which you portrayed them as "evil" and "unfair" and "mean" and "unrepentant" for over a decade now.

Just stop it now. All your crappy new "secure" messenger apps have failed awesomely. Delete your life now, please. This isn't about net neutrality or safety on the internet. This is all about you, permanently exaggerating about security and permanently training people to be introverted paranoid egoistic shit people so that they buy your elitist bullshit software.

Sorry for my low english skills, but please stop to exist, thank you.

For almost twenty years I have sheltered in the protective, safe, warm bosom of Debian. For a long time, it had the largest body of available software of all the distros, and by far when Ubuntu rose to prominence. So I used Ubuntu for years for the depth of package availability, and because if something esoteric was released, it would almost certainly come out first on Ubuntu, and sometimes only on Ubuntu. I was happy. Things were good.

But over time, Ubuntu and even Debian started to lean harder and harder on gnome, which I've always hated, along with all desktop environments, as they obscure the system from the user, and introduce graphical layers of abstraction, so the actual job of getting things done becomes a black art, hidden behind gnome-specific tools. This is my preference, and It's been disheartening in recent years to see the direction the desktop appears to be taking.

Then I joined devrant in 2017, and until then, I had heard peripherally about Arch, but never more than that. I had not heard of Manjaro at all. People started posting success stories and happy screenshots, and I was intrigued.

In 2018 I built a windows machine to use for parsec streaming games that wouldn't run on my linux rig. For not a great deal of money, I built a solid machine that's unequivocally better than any machine I've ever used, and installed windows on it. For a while, I was pleased. I had the best of both worlds: a windows box to stream some games from, and a linux desktop for everything else.

But after a couple months, as proton matured, I found fewer and fewer reasons to use my windows machine. My use of it declined to where I was last week: it had been months since I'd even powered it on. It was the most powerful machine I've ever used, and it was just collecting dust behind the TV in the living room. The full realization came to me while I was fighting a battle in the Gnome Takeover War, and I realized: I don't have to do this.

I pulled the newer machine out from behind the TV and installed Manjaro architect edition on it. The flexibility in the install was staggering. I am using nilfs2 for my /boot and / partitions: an option that Ubuntu has never offered. Normally they just default you into the garbage ext4 filesystem, and if you can dig deep enough, you can install with something else, though you have to really want it, in my opinion.

But Manjaro has been a dream-come-true. Pacman is easily the best package manager I have ever used, and pamac's intuitive and easy commands are a great view into AUR. Booting into the virtual console instead of a display manager has been wonderful too. On Ubuntu, I had to disable systemd's version of runlevel 5 to even get it working. But I just popped my xrandr script into my .xinitrc, and X opens with startx in less than a second. On Ubuntu, it takes about 5-10 seconds.

This has nothing to do with Manjaro, but I also switched to Radeon for this install, and I couldn't be happier about that. No more "installing" nvidia's drivers.

No more gnome. No more PPAs. No more settling. I am a Manjaro user now. Full stop. Thank you, devrant, for bringing it to my attention.

I just lost faith in the entire management team of the company I'm working for.

Context: A mid sized company with
- a software engineering departmant consisting of several teams working on a variety of products and projects.
- a project management department with a bunch of project managers that mostly don't know shit about software development or technical details of the products created by engineering.

Project management is unhappy about the fact that software engineering practically never sticks to the plan regarding cost, time and function that was made at the very beginning of the project. Oh really? Since when does waterfall project management work well? As such they worked out a great idea how to improve the situation: They're going to implement *Shopfloor Management*!

Ever heared about Shopfloor Management? Probably not, because it is meant for improving repetitive workflows like assembly line work. In a nutshell it works by collecting key figures, detecting deviation in these numbers and performing targeted optimization of identified problem areas. Of course, there is more to Shopfloor Management, but that refers largely to the way the process just described is to be carried out (using visualisation boards, treating the employee well, let them solve the actual problem instead of management, and so on...). In any case, this process is not useful for highly complex and hard-to-predict workflows like software development.

That's like trying to improve a book author's output by measuring lines of text per day and fixing deviations in observed numbers with a wrench.

Why the hell don't they simply implement something proven like Scrum? Probably because they're affraid of losing control, affraid of self managed employees, affraid of the day everybody realizes that certain management layers are useless overhead that don't help in generating value but only bloat.

Fun times ahead!

So... GDPR.
And the deadline.
And I have no idea what to do.

What does it mean for one-man indie projects? Data protection officers? Companies? Controllers? Processors? EU employees? Argh.

Look, please, EU. Not everyone can afford to hire an entire team for this, when their current team is literally one person.

Yes, the GDPR is probably a step in the right direction, but I think I'll just stop collecting the data altogether.

(All data I collect is just user settings stored in a database, nothing more.)

Can someone point me in the right direction?

A month or so ago this manufacturer of soldering equipment contacted me with the request to make a video about a review unit (a soldering handle) that they'd send to me for free in exchange. Initially I was really pumped about it - company would send me free stuff!! - but fast-forward to today and I realized how terrible a choice I've made by accepting that offer.

See, that handle is worth only €40 and I've spent so much time on the bloody video material already that it'd make my "pay" expected to be close to €1/h if not less. I feel like I've been exploited, especially since I don't even like the handle's design and am not using it. It's just collecting dust, making my work essentially free labor.

I could return the item but that's gonna cost me a fuckload of money, I could pay for the handle and cut my losses that way.. or I could do the review anyway and end up feeling very bad about that company. Or I could tell them to fuck off and lose a supply chain for my soldering equipment.

I have no idea what to do about this..

Oh and the fact that the correspondent in that company has the worst Chinglish skills imaginable, the communication skills of a toddler and is also super indecisive (they asked me to make a YouTube video first which led me to assume a video format for YouTube, but instead they want to put it on their fucking AliExpress product page, rendering my existing video footage useless!) doesn't help either.. I hate that shit company. Fucking leeches!

Anyway, what would you do when you're in a position like that?

Thanks everyone for giving me enough ++ to get my very own stress ball, also a special thanks zuckABird. If it wasn't for your data collecting madness i would of missed out. Ha

This is a reminder for the people that keep saying ApPle CarEs FOr My priVacY BeCausE thEy stoPed 3rD PartY aPps fRoM cOllEcTiNg mY dAta

!rant

Today was a lot. I heard water outside and some shouting, come to find out the upstairs neighbor’s pipe burst. Spent the next hour or two collecting as much water as possible in the coolers we have to try to move it to the storm drain and protect the downstairs neighbor’s apartment. You'd be amazed how much water can fish out of a broken pipe.

Spent a nice hour or two chatting with the downstairs neighbor after they asked what happened (having just realized the water was shut off and having missed all the activity).

Was just settling down from that when I heard a kid screaming for help and panicked shouting. Come to find out my favorite neighbor is unresponsive and can't breathe and her kids are all panicked and waiting for the ambulance. The 911 operator is trying to give them instructions but they're too panicked to listen. I get them to move her onto the floor, then finally get the oldest to do chest compressions until the ambulance shows up. The paramedics managed to get her back, she was breathing on her own and talking, and take her to the hospital but it took a long time to get there. Hugged the heck out of everyone who seemed like they needed it and tried to say comforting shit that it seemed like they needed to hear.

I haven't felt this emotionally tapped out in a long-ass time.

Just discovered a major bug in a frontend app of ours that might have been collecting wrong data in a form for months already :)

That is what happens when you put a back end Dev to do front end and back end while demanding rework every fucking 2 days for 9 months straight.

I'm starting to think we might need a global union for developers. I have been reading the comments today and it looks like a lot us getting way underpaid.

New features should be a moment of joy if they are released. So far so good. People really liked the idea of working together on opensource project. The app is updated. But then we encountered a major problem. It looks like some of us are getting so underpaid that they can't pay for the 14 dollar it cost to start the opensource project they want. We must rebel against this.

14 dollar, how much is 14 dollar. How many hobbies cost 14 dollar to start up. From running to collecting stamps. Its going to cost you more And how many hobbies are you as passionate about as your own open source project.

The next great thing is that it is show in the place where developers are eagerly looking to join a opensource project. And will probably join you're product because I'm sure between all of us there are tons of wonderfull ideas just waiting to be build.

And for me personal I do not mind supporting an app that I use almost every day. And just keeps growing without annoying ads.

So you should be more then willing to pay 14 dollars. And are ready to start recruiting your team.

And if you really can't pay. Your house burned down, you needed it for food. Your only pc is beyond saving. You can be a positive force in this community and do pay with upvotes.

But if you are to much a cheapskate to pay 14 dollars well, I think I was clear enough.

Bot spends 30 minutes collecting data
I forgot to add a W to the file open call in python
Data gone.
Fuck.

I'm on a call collecting requirements to a feature request that was developed last year, deployed last month, and nobody has a fucking clue about what's going on.

I'm also getting told that my requirements won't work, when they clearly will.

What's fucking crazy? In the time that I have wasted on this topic, I could have already written the fix.

Wow! They are incredible!

I keep creating new email filters every week or so, and they keep finding new ways to send me spam!

The best part is - these emails are sent from our internal infra. Judging by the sender it looks like they have created a bot collecting various events and sending them to... everyone.

Much smart. Many useful.
Much working

An actual anonymous web browser that doesn't collect location info, search history, etc. It also blocks any website you use from collecting data on you.

I have a habit of collecting programming ebooks that people suggest online but never actually bothered to read them.

Fuck uninspired jr devs that are simply collecting a pay check.

I have been handed a project that a jr dev was allowed to wallow on for over two fucking years. This lazy mother fucker managed to create 5 functions, a whole fucking mess of bullshit that I now have to straighten out on top of the 8 other things that I have to deliver on in the next month.

They never followed requirements. Not-a-one. The API is fully broken. The DB schema is BEYOND fucked. There's ZERO validation/sanitation on I/O. The deployments only work half the fucking time. Their code is so spaghetti I'm getting triggered from when I worked at Olive Garden with Eminem. But hey, at least they were able to demo it to the client to say "it works".

I don't condone violence, but every time I find malformed if statements, linter exceptions, broken deploy configurations in this project -- I just want to kick them in their stupid fucking face.

Wherever you ended up you piece of shit, I hope your dreams of becoming a rich asshole only bring you unending despair. I believe you can make it though, because you're already halfway there.

We are now in a full swing enshittification of the entire internet. Almost no companies are interested in providing any value, it's the phase of securing the position between those that provide value and clients - and just collecting rents. Capture enough of the market, milk the product and the client, turn the service into shit while charging progressively more until it all burns and crashes. And then, well, pass go, collect $200, rinse and repeat.

It worked! After all those years I've talked someone into linux'ising all theit workstations :) now that someone is eventually convinced it would solve most of the problems. Now they are collecting all the bau requirements. Next - testing phase. And then, if all works out well - reinstalling 100+ workstations with linux :)

yayyy

This is my bottom drawer. That's +150 packets of honey from the cafe downstairs. I've been slowly collecting them since I started working here. I'm leaving soon and thinking about leaving them so the next dev can have a pleasant surprise 😂

“I sent a document to print but it hasn't come out... I think the printer might be broken”

NO! The printer is not BROKEN just because you can’t print. You see that person over there at the printer? Yes, that one collecting their print job now? THE PRINTER IS NOT BROKEN!

What's with all this micro-certification nonsense that seems to plague the industry? Does anyone actually give a shit that I may have passed some vendor's five day bootcamp?

Apparently I can now have a trophy (virtual, of course) if I complete X online MS courses.

Some of these courses seem to focus on stuff that has no use in day-to-day work.

And I have to actually pay because I learned your product and then pay to maintain the cert in some cases. WTF?!

I can see why the vendors do it---I like free money too---but why have we even let this become a thing.

It's like collecting baseball cards.

I despair of what our industry has become...I really do.

Literally any of them. I've got several open projects.

My personal website- started it, got about half the front end done, no longer liked it, so I scrapped it. Take 2: got about half the front end done again, and again, didn't like it. So I just stopped working on it.

A website for a local business. I was just screwing around to test my skills, and got the entire front end almost exactly how I wanted it, and then just stopped. (I got busy and forgot about it, tbh.)

A fan page for a sports team. I was going to try and test my skills to make a blog-like website, got a large chunk of the front end down, and a bit of back end done. But it took a back seat to my personal site, and is just collecting dust.

I have procrastination issues.

This is what happened today in our dayli:

Lead: We need to profile our software

Me: You can use the chrome devtools as remote profiler, even on prod, or make HAR files for later inspection.

Lead: Yeah but no that’s just collecting data on every tick, we need something like “has been called x times”

Me: Yeah but you can filt -

Lead: Yeah no, so back when I wrote code in Delphi...

Me: *oh god no not this again*

Lead: ... We could have clicked a button in our IDE and it would wrap the function call with the API call to profile that function ...

Me, to the secret dev group in slack: doesn’t a simple method decorator and node performance api help with that?

The people in the group: We had this topic last Friday all day...

Me: oh well *get’s coffee and ignores lead*

So enlighten me here. Am I the only one that doesn't lose his absolute shit when it comes to privacy?
I know that some companies are collecting data, and to a certain extent, I'm fine with it as long as the trade-off is good.
I like that Google is "learning" who I am and what I like, cause now, I only see news and articles relevant to my interests, and search predictions are much better. Same with targeted Ads. On an off chance that I'm not using Adblock I like seeing products that I might like, which I otherwise probably wouldn't even know existed.
Except for Microsoft. I have no idea why, but that's where I draw the line.

jQuery. jQuery everywhere.

People's dependency on this library would be like everybody carrying a tool chest with them, even for basic jobs like re-arranging a stack of books or collecting leaves in the yard. Cmon y'all, JS does a lot of this out of the box without the bloated library.

But then again, I'm addicted to MOMENTJS, so I should probably shut up now. 😆😄😬

Whyyyyyyy do people go back on their word and stab you in the back just to make themselves look better?

Mate, I’ve got a paper trail of your request, detailing EXACTLY what you asked for. Don’t make me use it against you to prove you’re wrong and I’m right... guess I better start collecting emails to use as self defence 😩😔

Is it just me, or are the media / journalists once again putting a stupidly unfair pessimistic spin on that SpaceX launch?

"SpaceX rocket launches but explodes shortly into flight"
"Musk's SpaceX big rocket explodes on test flight"
"SpaceX rocket explosion: None injured or killed"

They've said time and time again, it's the first test of a massively complex rocket that's bigger than anything that's ever gone before it, and success is just defined as "getting off the launch pad" and collecting data. They did that and then some.

But instead of spreading excitement about the data, the fact it launched, that it's a world first, etc. - it's all doom and gloom, implying that the whole thing was a failure and people could have died 🙄

And people wonder why I have a low opinion of journalists.

Today,
I tried setting up XAMPP for running my friends code.. it took 5hrs and faced atleast one issue in every step from installation to running.

First
1) XAMPP Did not download itself, found that internet was down.

2) downloaded finally, installation phase went till 98% fatal error, windows collecting info for diagnosis

5)after 3 tries , suddenly it installed successfully

6)Apache force shut, every time I started it

7)1.5 hours later found VM had occupied the port 80, making it shut.
Changed the port

8)PHPmyadmin was recent ,that SQL 5.1 support was not There.

9)Now after setting up new instance of MySql 5.6 , created conflict.
Project referred one instance and PHPmyadmin referred other

10) Changed port numbers and added service entry in windows to make it work

At last the struggle ended up with happy ending.

My installation story precisely

Iam new to PHP development and XAMPP.

I started noticing something about startups here. They all think they r innovative and full of fresh ideas, but they all just copy bigger companies. My old coworker started a small web dev company and they are using php with react, the company ladder is the fucking same as anywhere else.

I noticed these as i was collecting ideas for a company (if i write that word again pls shoot me). So far we are thinking
0) no, or minimal local storage, we would have a github subscription, jira cloud, vps
1) no strict hierarchy, ultimately the ceos would make the decisions but in every meeting we would include even the interns
2) the stack would not be set in stone, java spark and vuejs are good starting points but frameworks exist to serve a purpose
3) like 2-3 days office time per week, if someone wants to work from a café, why not

Can I at least save my work before you fucking finish collecting the error info?

Best boss I've had was when I was collecting recycling materials as a truck driver.
The company mostly employs unliterated people that can't get a job anywhere else, so It has lots of dumb, jealous people who made his life miserable.
Still, he's so good with people that he could filter it all out and we had a great relationship even in such a poisonous environment.
He was really sad when he told me I wouldn't have my contract renewed. He allowed me to work from 5 am to 2 pm so I could finish my 12grade class (high school) at night and I fell asleep one day. The company does not renew contracts if you miss even one day. When people talked bad about each other he would just nod and do nothing or descalate the situations.

Well, I'm off to help my dad again :( he's the one who gave me the taste for DIY, but fuck his projects take so much time. Were repainting a motorhome :D

!rant
How to earn a lot of money as a programmer?

So this question might sound a little naive and too simple, but earning a lot of money is what we all want after all right? Collecting experiences from people in the business should be a good idea.

So this is the position I am in:
I am a German student in my 13th year of school (which means I will graduate this summer) and I am very interested in information technology. I know C++ pretty well by now and I have built a rendering engine for a game I want to make using openGL already, which I am very proud of.
I would love to turn this passion into my profession and thats why I plan to attend a dual course of computer science next year (dual means that I will be employed at a company (or similar) in parallel to the studying course).

But what direction should I be going in if I want to make big money later on? I am ready to spend a lot of time and work on this life project but I don't know which directions are the most promising. I hate being a tiny gear in a huge machine that just has to keep spinning to keep the machine alive, I want to be part of a real project (like most people probably) and possibly sell a product (because I think that is how you really make money).

Now I know there is no magic answer to this, but I bet many people here have made experiences they can share and this could help a lot of people directing their path in a more success oriented way.

I personally am especially interested in fields which are relatively low-level and close to memory (C++), go hand in hand with physics and 3D simulation and are somewhat creative and allow new solutions. (These are no hard lines, I just thought I should give a little direction to what I know already and what I am interested in)

But really, I am interested in any work you are likely to earn a lot of money with.

Me:- Facebook is bad , its collecting out data.
Friend:- So what let them collect our data.

le Mark Zuckerberg in the corner cashes in 💸

Friend:- As long as I get my free stuff everything's all right.

le Mark Zuckerberg comes to know he is an adopted 👶🏻 and earns more 💸

There was this project where a bunch a scripts had been running for three weeks analysing a bunch of fileshares. The project was in overrun and the analysis wasn't anywhere near done.

I was given complete isolation and a team of people who were instructed to do anything I needed. I had them replicate the data to as many machines as possible and I started scripting the analysis with some sample data. After half a day of collecting laptops, desktops and severs I transfered my scripts to those machines and ran the analysis in 5 hours.

I felt like I saved the project.

The first mistake I made as I started my web dev journey was course collecting.

It's a trap that most beginners fall for.

A while back a buddy and I were keen on making an MMORPG that for a variety of reasons just didn't work out.

Game development is an exercise in futility unless you have a LOT of time and a LOT of willpower. Unfortunately, where the project would have taken at least both of us, only one of us was able to actually do the work. I'll leave it up to you to figure out which one of us it was :|

It sucks because it was a stellar idea, the art style was going to be amazing, and I had already began working hard on a lot of the music. My best musical work to date, just sitting private on my soundcloud, unused and collecting dust.

Listening to them now still fills me with that glimmer of hope to a degree, but it's bittersweet.

So excited about this beast... wish I had a model f... but this will suffice for now.. definitely going to start collecting older stuff. As an embedded software engineer working on AI projects and such give you a good reference point of what was possible in the day with less

Am I the only one that has an obsession with collecting stickers? I don't even stick them. Dev stickers are my favorites obviously.

While on topic of google collecting too much data, is there an chromium like android os, that doesnt spy on its user? Adroidium?

I have an idea but no time to build it. So I'll throw it out there and see if anyone does it.

How many times have you had an idea that just couldn't get off the ground without a little assistance. Where do you go? How to "pay" them for their work? Etc.

The development community needs a place where you can volunteer to help with side projects and get paid in karma... which you can then later use to "pay" other developers to assist on a side project of your own.

We are already a community that loves to give back, and collecting fake internet points. Why not put those to good use?

Goto the play store and look for a flashlight, you'd find thousands of apps.

So what's the big idea? Well the big problem here is the whopping millions of downloads each one of them has

Let's assume there are a 1000 flashlight apps and I assure you there are!

1000* 1 million users... Either that or people exist with weird fantasies of collecting flashlight apps

For collecting garbage data

Woah TIL

"Kinder Surprise is a hollow milk chocolate egg shell containing a toy. [...] it is banned in the US since the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act prohibits confectionary products containing 'non-nutritive objects'"

I loved collecting those toys as a child (and still love the chocolate)

Just got my collector's edition Assassin's Creed soft drink cups!!! Didnt have to watch the movoe though .. went for another movie and got these!!

With the invention of pip every project done with python just fucken angers me. Like mostly nothing fucken works if there is a single .py file in there. You can put your easy-install.sh up your ass if it just ~tries~ to install shit via pip before because IT WONT WORK FUCK THIS SHIT!

STOP USING PYTHON FOR PROJECTS YOU RELEASE PLS CUS SHITS UNREADABLE AND WONT WORK ON MY MACHINE. MAKE ROOM FOR PROJECTS MANAGED BY NPM OR SHIT LIKE THAT WHERE `npm install` ACTUALLY DOES IT'S JOB THANKS I'M ANGRY AF.

WHAT DOES COLLECTING EVEN MEAN AND WHEN IS IT DONE DUDE?!

I’m collecting the offensive words that target me personally. The more it stings the better.

I only need single words, the simpler the better. I don’t need a long burns.

Once I collect them, I’m planning to give them to my future sexual partner to call me proper names while they hatefuck me during a consensual non-consent session.

So please help me :)

The worst part of collecting crash reports is that the application crashes the whole system so the report won't be sent. Fml

Struggling to debug a test which prints out like 400-500 lines of logs in console and I can't find any of those to be useful.

Me while debugging with DevRant ..

Is this the end of my life!!!!
Even without a wife..
I should start collecting some bucks,
And buy some ducks,
The devDucks,
To accompany me through the mist of the unknown console logs,
Playing treasure hunt,
Performing stunt,
And find out the hidden treasure behind this mist

In the last few days I've been collecting data for our lidar-based people detector, and it made me wonder if foot fetish is also extended to lidar scans 😂

I hate the current state of internet based service providers. They are collecting so much data, it's scary and borderline stalking.

A simple search on Netflix changes ads shown by Google. I watch a lot of Japanese/Korean drama and now my ads are in Japanese. What the actual fuck.

I run windows 10 on my main rig because of steam and windows only games. One day I was searching for filezilla in windows search. Since it is now handled by the same UI as cortana, it searched it on the web too. So now I have ads related to ftp hosting in Japanese.

Sometimes I feel like just formatting my system and install debian on it. But those games man. May be I can live without them.

Can we bring back the internet from 2008. It was so much better back then.

I know you pals know much more than me about privacy. I have these questions to you all:

- can google still know trends about me if I only use google docs and google drive to store files I share with other people and rarely update it? Let’s say I don’t use google search or any other google service ON REGULAR BASIS
- does chromium actually works as the measure to get rid of google tracking if I don’t want to use Firefox?
- how safe is apple (miss me with that Apple hate)? How bad is the fact that I let apple store my regularly updated health information and I use iPhone?

I’m not talking about triple letters here (FBI, CIA, etc), I’m only talking about collecting and selling data across companies

How do you guys cope with being a junior dev and constantly receiving criticism about your work from your team leader?
I started working as a developer quite late: I did go to college in my early years but I was lazy at the time, so I didn't complete it. So I worked about ten years in a totally different industry, but I always wanted to go back to being a developer.
I've managed to do it when I was 34: I was a web developer in a small company and I was pretty much the only dev, except for an older dude who only knew Visual Basic 6 and kept programming things with it (in 2020ish!). In those years I always felt like a was way ahead of my colleague, and my efforts to apply best practices were not so welcome.
I eventually got tired of that situation, because I was feeling like wasting my time: I was already quite old and stuck in a jurassic environment
Then, I landed in a new company. Completely different environment: they use modern frameworks, TDD, static analysis, code reviews and stuff, and they do one to one meetings every two weeks. From the beginning, I felt like I was the dinosaur there: they were way ahead of me and I struggled to keep the pace. I immediately said that to my manager, but he was like "don't worry, it's just the start. I'm sure you will do great". Except I did not. I started collecting criticism about my work and I keep receiving it. When I tell my manager that constant criticism is not good for my self esteem, he replies "I can understand, but you have to manage it and I cannot avoid to correct you when you make mistakes". But it became really difficult for me to receive constant criticism, I very rarely have a compliment or a good word about what I do.
Is it just me? Should I finally grow up now that I am almost 40 and accept that working always sucks and you cannot be satisfied of what you do? Or am I simply a bad developer and should look for another job?
I am starting to get tired of this situation.

Wow... Google screwed up in data collecting

I know I am probably late to the facebook drama, but I think taking out of this all is just how genius and evil all those collector companies are.

I would have probably never thought of collecting data off of mechanical turks and quick jobbers, but they did not only think of it, they deployed their system across multiple jobs, scanning more and more data in from all those connected logins, for less than a dollar per profile, which generates atleast 300 profiles on average.

The real question is why is it allowed for a third party app to actually access all that? even if there's a permission for that, why would such exist?

I really can't see why any application would need access to likes, shares, all friends, all their profiles etc.

Sometimes I really hate designers.

I was collecting the colors used in a new layout and this only the part with gray colors of what I've ended up with.

(I may just merge some of those, like 7 and 8. Also none of them are results of transparent shading, I made sure)

At any given company, there are

those that do

and

those that do not

I've mostly (and sadly) worked with the latter

and those are the people who are like "ahhh yeah, no worries, don't worry about it! we need you to stay positive, not rage! why you get so worked up?" and i'm like YEAH YOU DONT HAVE TO FUCKING WORRY BECAUSE YOU DONT DO ANYTHING! YOU HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO RESPONSIBILITY IN THIS COMPANY AND ARE A FLOATING BLOB COLLECTING YOUR PAYCHECK, THAT'S WHY I GET ALL NEW ASSIGNMENTS AND AM RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM WHILE YOU ARE STILL WORKING ON TASKS ASSIGNED TO YOU TWO QUARTERS AGO!!!!!!!!

god who am i kidding, it'll never change

...man I am on an absolute rant rampage the past few days, feels good >:)

My phone has a useless Google Discover page on home screen that I can't use without singing in with Google and agreeing to them collecting data. 😐

So now I have a useless page on my home screen. (Really, somebody needs to make a layering over app for this shit that just gets my preferred feed and fill it here to makes use of this space. )

I called the hack "blow up bunny", was in my first company.

We had 4 industrial printers which usually got fed by PHP / IPP to generate invoices / picking lists / ...

The dilemma started with inventory - we didn't have time to prepar due to a severe influenza going round (my team of 5 was down to 2 persons, where on was stuck with trying to maintain order. Overall I guess more than 40 % ill, of roughly 70 persons...)

Inventory was the kind of ultimate death process. Since the company sold mobile accessoires and other - small - stuff.

Small is the important word here....

Over 10 000 items were usually in stock.

Everything needed to be counted if open or (if closed) at least registered.

The dev task was to generate PDFs with SKUs and prefilled information to prevent disaster.

The problem wasn't printing.

The problem was time and size.

To generate lists for > 10 000 articles, matching SKUs, segmented by number of teams isn't fun.

To print it even less. Especially since printers can and will fail - if you send nonstop, there is a high chance that the printer get's stuck since the printers command buffer get's cranky and so on.

It was my longest working day: 18 hours.

In the end "Blow up bunny" did something incredibly stupid: It was a not so trivial bash pipeline which "blew up" the large PDF in a max of 5 pages, sent it to one of the 4 printers in round robin fashion.

After a max of 4 iterations, bunny was called.

"bunny" was the fun part.

Via IPP you can of course watch the printer queue.

So...

Check if queue was empty, start next round with determined empty printer queues.

Not so easy already. But due to the amount of pages this could fail too.

This was the moment where my brain suddenly got stuck aft 4 o clock in the morning in a very dark and spookey empty company - what if the printer get's stuck? I could send an reset queue or stuff like that, but all in all - dead is dead. Paper Jam is paper jam.

So... I just added all cups servers to the curl list of bunny.

Yes. I printed on all > 50 printers on 4 beefy CUPS servers in the whole company.

It worked.

People were pretty pissed since collecting them was a pita... But it worked.

And in less than 2 hours, which I would have never believed (cannot remember the previous time or number of pages...)

Brogrammers who've got no love for the game, just collecting a sweet paycheck. Breaks my heart

The one awkward thing about amigurumi is when it’s a pattern that’s assemble at the end rather than assemble as you go and it feels like you’re collecting body parts. (Currently trying to make a Kitsune, which means that I have 1 head and body, 2 arms, 2 legs, 1 belly, 1 snout, 2 ears, and 9 tails)

It’s also nerve-wracking because I just know that these pieces are all okay independently but I’m going to suck at assembly and make it turn out awful.

😅😭😅

By collecting free ebooks from packtpub once a week.

I prefer it doing 2 tasks parallely during the initial phase of requirement gathering and design phase.(makes more sense if you are working extremely new system and framework)
1. Keep collecting requirements from clients and understand them.
2. Collect different designing aspects for the project and parallely, build a POC for 2 purpose: to get hands into the new Framework and also as a demo to clients. Working on POC helps in 3 ways: Improving understanding of requirement, improving framework knowledge, and playing around with code whenever bored of designing and reading tons of existing designs..
3. Once primary requirements are clear and fixed, analyse all different designs, if possible I setup meetings with senior devs, principal engineers (they help a lot when it comes to reviews on scalability and reliability of a design)
4. The above design is mostly architectural level. Once design is fixed, then I start taking each component and prepare a detailed implementation design. (Notice that whenever I am bored of designing, I spend sometime in building POC)
5. In detail design, I focus on modularity and flexibility. Anything defined should have getters and setters for example. This will help you reuse your code. Keep the interface between components in your design as generic as possible, so that in case your MySQL is change to Postgre or NoSQL, your design should be able to adapt new features..
6. Instead of building entire project, define feature targets and deliver small features.. this will help you to be in line with the requirements with minimum deviation.

I'm not proud of this, but I'm not sure there's a better way of doing this.

Context: texture sheets are massive, so I wanted them to be gced when possible. Problem is, during init, the gc kept collecting the sheets, which added a full 5-10 seconds to load times.

This ensures that the sheets stay in memory until everything is initialized.

At one point in my career I tried to do a payment plan for the websites I built for some reason (I guess to make it more affordable for people???).

Out of the 3 people I onboarded 1 of them actually finished paying for everything.

The other 2 didn't make it half way through.
Their invoices are overdue collecting interest to this day. Websites are shutdown.

Collecting vintage computer, c64, trs-80s, apple II, etc.
It's so addictive...

I figured I would share my Capstone from this semester with a community that might be interested. An eclipse plugin that was developed in our lab is able to implicitly track developer eye gazes as they work in an IDE (eclipse in this case). Before I began work on it, source code, bug reports, and stack overflow documents could be tracked with all of the data on said documents being extracted. For example, if source code is being tracked, everything from the file name and class/method name down to statement types are collected. The tracking isn't on still images. Since it's within an IDE, you can open multiple files, scroll, and modify -- all while tracking is collecting accurate data based on the (x, y) gaze coordinate and the handler assigned to the type of document/file being viewed.

My job was to extend this functionality to track gazes on UML class diagram documents. This means I had to gather data at the highest level: the class/connection being looked at, down to the lowest level: members/methods, their types and containing classes.

Being new to Java's EMF, GEF, and eclipse plugin development, I had a bit of a learning curve. Anyways here is the poster of the functionality I added. 🙃

Not much of a rant haha.

So I have question about my resume.
During my college time, I have done two projects related to politics:
One is to analyze the bias of media. What I did is scrape news covers for Trump and Hillary during election year and get sentiment analysis. The result is not surprising that among NY Times, NBC, Fox, Eashington Post, and CNN, Fox news is clearly favoring Trump, since Fox news is a republican news site.
The other project I did was to analyze the speech complexity and sentiment of the election. One of the observation we made was that Hillary and Trump are almost at the same level regarding speech complexity. However, Trump has a more positive sentiment in the speech, which is true consider how much he loves to say make America great again.

Now the question is, when I gave my advisor my resume, she said that I'd better not put those two projects on my resume since they are related to politics.

But, I am applying for a data science master degree. Seriously, I was just collecting the data and the data speaks for himself, why should I take those projects off my resume? I'm very proud of those projects I did as a matter of fact.

So here is the question. Shall I take off those two projects on my resume because they were political or I should leave it thereawarreally need some professional views. Please.

Hell of a Docker

One application in c++. 4 in c# targeting Linux. Several logging places, Several configuration files , dozens of different folders to access (read/write). Many applications being called from just one that orchestrates everything.

OS is Linux. Installation is to be made inside a docker image and later placed in a container by means of several bash files and python scripts. All these are part of a legacy set of applications.

They’ve asked me to just comment out one line which took 3 days to find out because they didn’t remember where it was and in which application it was and what was in that line.

After changing it, I was asked to create a test environment which must have resemblance to the current server in production. 12 days later And many errors, headaches, problems with docker, I got it done.

Test starts and then, problems with docker volumes, network, images, docker-composer, config files and applications, started to appear.

1 month later, I still have problems and can’t run all applications at least once completely using the whole set.

Just one simple task of deploying locally some applications, which would take one or two days, is becoming a nightmare.

Conclusion: While still trying to figure out why an infinite loop was caused by some DB connection attempt in an application, I am collecting a great amount of hate for docker. It might be good for something, that’s for sure, but in my experience so far, it is far worse than any expectations I had before using it.

Lesson learned: Must run away from tasks involving that shit!

Why the fuck is everyone behind this whole privacy thing . I mean what did you expect , servers do cost... you know . No one wants to provide you a service to chat with your shit collecting butler in the adjacent room unless it's going to benefit them .

Stick your face on the internet and want people to date you ?

Understand that your virtual social needs need to be supported by a ridiculous amount of electricity and man power which wouldn't be required if you could just throw out your rotting willie nilles in the open .

All this isn't fucking free .. wait were you shocked ? Oh so you just thought there were a few thousand servers powering buckets of pictures of horse poop that you for some reason thought your girlfriend was interested in . NO!

IT'S PRIVACY you are paying with your gaddamn privacy !! Information pays just like the time you paid a 100 bucks to the boyfriend of your girlfriend to find out more details .

Ridiculous . You people don't like ads . You don't like paying . You don't like providing information . THEN DON'T USE THE DAMN INTERNET .

IF YOU'RE REALLY THAT CONCERNED ABOUT YOUR PRIVACY THEN SPEND SOME VALUABLE TIME TO ACQUIRE ENOUGH OF A SKILLSET TO SETUP A VPN AND STOP POSTING YOUR PHONE NUMBER ON YOUR EX'S WALL ASKING HER TO CALL YOU.

One more honest thing to rant about is ads . As much as you hate them they're an easy way out . I'm not sure why a 20 second ad would bother you on mobile and not on television and I'm not sure why you wouldn't buy the ad company and shut it down if 20 seconds were so costly to you .

I want to rant even more on uninstalling services like Windows and Google for stupid reasons but I'll take a break here . My frustration has touched low levels.

So I recently purchased Ark and I gotta say I can totally recommend single player/ local multi.

It's not exactly stable. And non-dedicated private servers are pretty limited. But it's fun nonetheless. The animals are neat, the landscape is gorgeous, and the base building is interesting and intuitive.

One of the things I don't exactly love about Minecraft is that your shelter doesn't matter much. Build some walls to keep the mobs out and you're good. But Ark is much more hostile. You need to avoid cold, and rain, and heat, and big Dino's that want to bite you and stomp you. So your shelter actually protects you.

Not only that but materials are so easy to get in Minecraft. You can have a full house by the end of your first day, easily. But Ark makes resource collecting difficult. You need some dino companions to hold your stuff because it becomes too heavy for you alone. And it takes days, maybe even in-game weeks to build a suitable house. And you can spend much, much longer making it more than just a wooden box.

Cool game! Definitely in my top 3 right now.

It is with great sorrow I am announcing that an Apple Watch can catch fire while on your wrist. I bashed Fitbit very hard for this when they were giving people burn scars for life. Collecting and selling data is one thing, but mutilating bodies because of negligence and wanting to save a buck on manufacturing is a whole another thing. It seems like Apple is not much different.

I am struggling with body dysmorphia, and I told you out loud that if a Fitbit device gave me a burn scar for life, I would've probably committed suicide. I still stand by these words. My body integrity is a big deal to me. Having a scar due to my own negligence, like mishandling a knife, is one thing, but the concept itself that some fucking hustle culture startup can mutilate my body is another thing. It scares me.

I am considering to abandon any kind of wearable electronics altogether. The cost of failure is just too high. I'm probably going to get a mechanical Timex or a Seiko.

Got a phishing email with a link to a website hosted by wix. The only thing on the site was a form and submit button so I’m sure it’s for collecting credentials. I was able to report them and wix shut it down which was nice. But I was thinking, if someone were to ddos the web server, what action would wix do? Would they let the requests keep coming and increase the customers bill? Or would they just shut down the server?

The hardest part about having stickers on my laptop ,is when it stops working and I have to get a new one from IT. So much for sticker collecting.

dream with unlimited time and money.... would be to start a kickstarter project that never actually launches and just keeps collecting even more money lol

!Rant
So I was reassigned from Android to backend a month ago...

Meaning a poor lonely Nexus 5 was just sitting collecting dust...

Saturday night and what do I do?
Go out like a normal person?
*Laughs way too loud*
Nahhhh let's do a pwnie install and start snooping on neighbors!!!

Should I connect my vacuum roboter to Travis CI/Appveyor and let it start cleaning on each successful deploy for a minute?

Just collecting ideas for the time it arrives and I root it :D

I run a small internal dashboard for my company. One of the big parts of this workflow is collecting data from various sources, so I can start using it. I collect it all to sql db so its in one place.
What is this called? Should this be a different job role, not the developers?

Im getting stalked so much by recruiters right now! Im ignoring a call every 10 minutes and writing back on mail/linkedin ever 15. Fuck offff! Please!

Im collecting all names, mails and numbers and maybe i’ll just fucking mass mail them all haha. And after that sign them up for freaking midgetporn muahahaha

I just finished posting this but think it deserves its own post.
If you're creating a business or "startup" (as people like to call it these days) don't assume the idea is novel or investors will just jump on board. Focus on the business fundementals, money and cash flow, even before launch, unless you can afford not to. But really you can't afford not to. Selling before launch means that you're effectively doing two things 1 you're collecting new customers and income for the business and 2 you're. raising awareness at the same time. Obscurity is death and failure.

Get you a good sales team and marketer when the time is right.

Have a year of runway.

Identify the sites and groups your target audience and investors frequent. Start conversations now, buzz is the hardest thing to generate.

Start building relations with customers and potential clients now. Discuss launch, ask them if they'd be willing to pay up front before launch, in order to secure a "lifetime membership", offer it as an early opportunity and charge extra. Giving a discount out of the gate is a mistake B/c it says to potential investors that you don't think it's ready or worth it yet. Of course if it's between making 1. Some money or 2. No money, don't let it be a deal breaker, offer a discount. Going from no clients to any clients is a BIG deal. If you can do 1 you can make it to 10, if 10, you can reach 100, we etc.

No one likes asking for money and yet it is as important if not more important than development.

Probably playing World of Warcraft and Overwatch with my wife and collecting everything related to it. We even got the music playing in our house most of the day :')

- I love blowing my mind. Even if it is the most confusing thing. Things like security mechanisms, neurons' behaviors, mathematics (even tho I hate it when I fail lol), electronics, medical terminology and chemistry.
- I love collecting rare coins, personally never-seen stones and put them into my collection. I love to be a designer. Not only on my laptop. I have a book shelf and within that book shelf I put stones that create the yin yang sign while pushing the books to two sides. That makes them look like they are levitating. I have stones (including obsidian) that create a triangle and a knife hanging down the wall of my room.
- I love visiting touristic, historic, naturally-beautiful but also non-touristic (non-touristic? yes. by that I mean visiting e.g. the areas of touristic cities which are dangerous, because you can easily fall down off of a slippery ground and take serious injuries) places around the globe, talk to complete strangers in public (I am trying to be an extrovert), take pictures with my camera and collecting antiquities.
- I love taking risks (no. I don't play any poker games etc on the internet) without trying to put other people in risk. Driving insanely with whatever I have. Car, bike, you name it.
- I love reading books. Books that are about human psychology, fantasy novels and books about programming languages.
- I love to cook (I am at the beginning).
- I love to use the konMari method of tidying up my room.
- I love plants.
- I love having everything in my room tidied up (even if I am too busy with other stuff and skip this cleaning process for a week upto a month sometimes. Sorry, room.).
- I love doing sports. But mostly sport that I have never tried before. This can be, because of my greedy wish for an adrenaline kick. That led me into taking a balloon flight at 4 am (sunrise) and to paragliding at sunset above Mediterranean sea btw. (I am normally afraid of flying, but paragliding was awesome).
- I love swimming. Like, you cannot pull me out of the sea for a minimum of 2 hours, if it is not important.
- I love laying above the sea water and let the sea carry me to somewhere else.
- I love being alone. I love the silence. I love to be free in my thoughts.
- I love watching the sunset, the light that shines through the forest, the moonlight and the stars at night.
- I love dreaming. No, like, lucid dreaming for example.
- I love being open to any opinions.
- I love to learn about other people's views about the world and their religion.
- I love pets and would do anything to keep them alive when they are ill. It hurts my heart seeing them like this.
- I love watching demonic "A: Holy shit! Did you see this thing, too?! B: Yes!" YouTube videos just for the fun of it, but I hate horror movies and games.
- I love trying out new things. The creation of music and video for example.
- I love to give my hair and beard a shape, if I am too lazy to go to the barbershop lol. By that I don't mean just going to the barbershop, but taking an electric razor and cutting my hair myself even if I get bad results from time to time that can be corrected by letting any family member tell me in which area of of my head the hair problem is.
- I don't like disco clubs.
- I don't like toxic people even though I can be a quite toxic person myself without realizing it. If I appear toxic to you, inform me about it. Having so much testosterone in that moment, can make me do things that I don't want to do.
- I don't like drugs even tho I have to admit that I am trying a few from time to time (maybe 6 months in-between) to have a dopamine kick. I am not an addict.
- I hate myself for things that I did in the past.
- I used to watch MMA videos etc.
- I used to use a telescope, but I can't find it anymore.
- I used to have a microscope, but I can't find it anywhere and besides of that the seller did literally piss in it before selling it to me many years ago. Don't want to touch it tbh.
- I used to play games, but I don't enjoy games anymore. That makes me feel sad.
- I miss the old moments of my life.

In conclusion:
I like how things went and go so far. It changed me so much. It made me a good and a bad person. I became more open and confident, but it also particularly made me a leader who can say "fuck off" in a bad way to his family. I would like to undo this particular part of me.

Dr Robotnik has to be a java dev... Bloated, lazy, never leaves his seat, occasionally garbage collecting his messy desk

When a webshop stock owner gets mad when their stock quantities don't add up, because it magically doubled +1y ago, and has been corrected now due to physically missing products while collecting ...

oh well.

I know some sites are tracking and collecting a lot of data for advertising. But this is fucking insane... 200!!!! for marketing? For real? Holy shit!
Fuck off already...

(A shitty Danish newspaper - can't even remember why I visited it)

Got stuck programming the accountability system for an entire State on my own because the IT shop basically refused to do any work. No help testing, no help debugging, no help with collecting and clarifying business rules, barely any help getting access to the data, and then after I had programmed the entire thing they paid a consulting company about 4xs what I was getting for them to port it to SQL and they still haven't gotten it right yet. Nothing like knowing that any mistakes in your code could cost multiple people their jobs to add some additional stress to the situation. It was actually the first time I ever experienced any physical symptoms from stress; and that includes the time when my convoy got attacked with a roadside bomb in Iraq.

As a student, am I the only one that surfs the internet for a significant amount of time to find out the best IDE for a specific programming language, only to then install multiple of them and test them out myself? The ones I don't stick with are still collecting dust in my laptop... dunno why I don't uninstall them.

1. Collecting old money from diffrent countrys around the world.
2. I'm obsessed with The AsoIaf books.
3. I got a list of 101 diffrent types of beer to drink before I die, Im at 30 something.

> Colleagues complain all the time about dumb shit which have no relevance whatsoever to the job (see my "cat in voice call" post): I get scolded, I need to change
> I complain for the first time in 2 years about relevant stuff which actually matters to the job (some guy collecting bad decisions one after the other): I get scolded, I shouldn't trash talk colleagues

The key lesson I'm learning here is how everyone is allowed to do everything towards everyone, everytime, but by God don't you dare doing it about what should be relevant about your fucking job. We don't do that here.

Deciding whether I should buy a PS5 is driving me nuts these days.

It has started to grow its library of amazing games. You may know about the Marvel Spiderman 2 trailer. It looks fire AF. So I know I'll enjoy playing games on it.

But I am afraid it'll take a hit on my productivity. So alright, don't play on weekdays.

But then it'll keep collecting dust and I don't want to buy something I'll use only couple hours a week. And who's to say I'll play every weekend? You skip one weekend and bam! You forget you even had a PS5.

It'll cost me about 500 USD which is right around the mark of me spending money that's on the umph side. It's not too much to make a dent in my savings but at the same time not too little that I don't have to think about it.

I'd probably end up not buying it because I am 30 years old and people like me shouldn't be wasting time playing games.

To ship a package of two USB cables from one US city to another. What could be easier for a large company? Well, hold on a little.

I ordered two fucking cables from fucking Nomad at 15TH OF FUCKING JULY, and they are still not shipped. Here's how their customer support works: you send them an email, they reply in like a day or two, and that's it, that email thread is abandoned. They won't visit it again. You should write a whole new message where you say "hey, the previous time you said me X, so I want you to do Y then", and the message title should be different, otherwise they'll ignore it.

My roof is under construction now. When it was raining and there was a rain both inside and outside my apartment, I filmed it and an article about the situation was in my local newspaper in like 20 minutes. Russian government organizations are notorious for ignoring people's requests, shutting down their telephones and doing other shit like that, but in one day I managed to collect the foundation of overhaul, my utilities provider, the foreman of the organization responsible for roof repair, his supervisor and the actual guy that did that job. That same day, they all was at my doorstep, collecting the evidence, signing papers, apologizing, threatening to sue each other and collectively signing a document that states that they owe me either a full financial compensation or an overhaul. I managed to do it in the country where you throw an empty plastic cup at a cop and go to jail for it for five years.

Nomad, tell me, what exactly is stopping me from going full Jackson Pollock with a .45 on your company all over the social media (props to @SortOfTested)? You think I can't handle a mediocre iPhone case manufacturer?

Think again.

When asked if i will code for stock options or profit shares, i might remind the prospect that in most countries, i would own the entire codebase if working for no pay. Most work for hire agreements put ownership of the system and code into the paying clients name, as i understand it. so if youre not collecting pay, you would own (possibly the only copy of) the code. If that doesnt scare the client away, maybe i should remind them id be legally allowed to sell the code to their competitors. Then do so if i see a bettrr paying client (i.e. any paying client) If anyone knows if im making legal sense id appreciate it.

Is pycharm collecting telemetry in community edition?

Who amongst you remembers Ultima Online?

At one point probably one of the best games ever made. Even wrote the record for most players online and got in the Guinness Book of records for it. This was during the dial-up days. You kids these days have no idea how slow internet was or how cool it was to hear those three special words, You've Got Mail.

Everquest and WOW dont have shit on this game even if it never really went 3D. There was a sorta blocky 3d but it sucked which is why it failed. Everyone was content with 2d because the blocky 3d was trash in most circumstances.

With Ultima it made you feel like a kinda second life. And it wasn't a chore like Life Is Feudal or many of the other grundy games of today.

My 80 year old grandfather played it all day everyday. That's how fucking good the game was.

I would still be playing the official servers a decade plus, later if they would stop adding unnecessary dlc and they wouldn't have added a pay store.

It seriously pisses me off that I spent years collecting and hoarding rare items that I actually fucking earned and the assholes add a pay store that lets these new players buy the item I fought a boss four hours to get.

It ain't fucking right. It literally makes the rares worthless and my efforts pointless.

EA also rushed Ultima IX so it was buggy as hell and technically unbeatable unless you edited the game to let you cheat. Richard Garriott made the game and bugs and all is a masterpiece. His new game Shroud of The Avatar, not so much but that's a different rant.

I honestly wish EA would go out of business. They have ruined enough of my favorite titles with their incompetent bullshit and greedy cash grabs. If they would just make UO the way it was around the second age or Lord Blackthorn I'd guess a lot of us old-school vets would come back.

But as it is our only real option is to build our own servers or play someone else's which is what I do. Fuck EA!

Currently collecting old Hong Kong Action Movies. Jackie Chan, Michelle Yeoh, Sammo Hung, Jet Li... Good Times :)

Have you managed to find any tricks to relieve the back of your hands while programming under these hot days we are having?
I am interested in collecting your ideas.

Python User-
C:\WINDOWS\system32>pip install scikit-image
CMD/Bash-
Collecting scikit-image
Downloading scikit-image(12.6MB)
██████████████████████████████
Collecting numpy
Downloading numpy(1.3MB)
██████████████████████████████
Collecting matplotlib
Downloading matplotlib(1.3KB)
██████████████████████████████
Collecting decorator
Downloading decorator(6.8MB)
██████████████████████████████
Collecting imageio
Downloading imageio(3.6MB)
██████████████████████████████
Collecting cycler
Downloading cycler(2.9MB)
██████████████████████████████

Installing collected packages cycler, imageio, decorator, matplotlib, numpy, scikit-image
Successfully installed cycler, imageio, decorator, matplotlib, numpy
Failed to load DLL of scikit-image.
C:\WINDOWS\system32>

So earlier today I went to a super market store and started gathering some items. After collecting a dozen items I felt like not buying. I put my trolley in a corner with items still in it and walked out if the store without buying anything. My first encounter with abandoning a cart in real life.. 😁😁

So as these people can see we can wait them out and we’re both gonna be skeletons collecting dust

Budge asshole
Sit at the goddamn table and budge on expectations or the deadline will be passed !

Been developing a website for a few months for a group of people who started a company in their spare time. Basically, everyone puts in about 5 hours a week. The two founders spent a year planning the site, creating mockups and collecting data. Site has user login, 5 main sections that all require custom programming to do what they need it to do.

After a month, the one dude is getting pissy with me because I can't get their site up any faster. I agreed to 5 hours a week, in my spare time for equity to a project that has no clear monetization plan. Sometimes my main job and paying clients eat even that time up.

To date, I've only got about 30 hours of actual dev time, and 15 hours of meetings. The first launch is in sight, but the site is a monster and has more phases to come.

But if a private question but for whoever wants to share, how much did your first job after graduation pay? I know it depends on the country or state ofc so let me know from where to. (Not collecting data for programmers starting salaries >.> I swear >.> )