Best story ever

This really happened to me yesterday at work.

Me: *walks into office*
Coworker: Hey Will, I got a question for you
Me: I...[read more]

I found a solid solution for clickbaiting!

You just have to:
... [read more]

How you can make the perfect clickbait that will even bring highly intellectual software engineers to click on your things?
It is very easy you only have t... [read more]

I hate the fucking news websites that make you press a "read more" button. Of course I want to read more, that's why I clicked on your fucking article!!

What did the librarian say to the kids?

... [read more]

Am I the only one who learns more on my own than at university? It really annoys me when I come here to study but all I do is read devRant posts all day, they are good tho.

That moment that you can help a customer with a highly technical question for the first time because you read something a year or more ago about that.

That feels awesome!

How to check stupid people..(i am one of them)
Ready?
Let's go...
3
2
1....[read more]

Working with a new dev several years ago -

Him: "Man, I don't get why everybody thinks coding is hard. It's easy!"

Me: "It gets tougher, the more you read the more you realize you know less than you think."

Him: "I'm done reading! I did all of my reading in college."

Me: thinking "have a nice career"

Idea for devRant for April 1st:
User opens devRant. Greeted with the message: "devRant has changed the UI to make it more suitable for developers. From now on, the complete devRant interface is going to be command line. Read the man pages to get started."
User greeted with:
$devRantUser >

This is how my day has gone so far:
1. In car, see advert about hackathon
2. Look it up, see tickets go on sale in 30mins
3. Read more about hackathon, apparently tickets go within minutes
4. Get tickets, print
5. Printer out of ink
6. Accidentally deleted ticket, can't reprint
7. No more tickets left so can't get another
8. Spend hours with data recovery tools
9. Remember recycle bin. Reprint ticket
10. Cry
11. Rant on devRant

The only bug I ever had in my life was when... [read more]

If I have to read the "Java developers don't C#, so they wear glasses" joke one more time, I will murder a kitten.

Client: That loading screen is going by too fast. The customer can‘t read the slightly too long text. Add 2 more seconds to the load time.

Is this real life?

Listen. Use invariants. If you can do

if(!x) {
return foo;
}
...rest of function logic...

Instead of

if(x) {
...some long branch with more tests...
} else {
return foo;
}

Please do. It's so much easier to read when all of your conditions are tested in a line at the top instead of nested 8 layers deep in if-else blocks.

Thanks

1. You don't code to add a feature or whatever. You do it to solve Users' problems. It's a User-centric system.
2. You read more code than you write. So help yourself and write code intended to be read.
3. If people don't know you did something, you did nothing!
4. Never answer a call at 3 am if you're not paid to be on night call-duty. You'll become the guy who answers at 3 am.
5. Remember the big difference between you and me is that I failed to do stuff more times than you have tried to do.
6. When you start shaving the yak, stop!

So I just started to use devRant on browser and noticed it shows the whole text from a rant, instead of putting read more just like the one on phone. Created a script for that thanks to @JoshBent

The best prank I ever pulled was on one of my IT teachers.
In 2011, I had an intense OOP JS training and whil ...[read more]

Ok, people who invented CSS... which seems more intuitive and easier to read?

div {
margin-right: auto;
margin-left: auto;
}

Or

div {
center-this-damn-div: true;
}

Usually I do love my colleagues, but lately....

FOR FUCKS SAKE I AM NOT YOUR WALKING HUMAN GOOGLE SEARCH ENGINE SHITOVERFLOW CHATGEPETTO INSTANCE! READ YOUR FUCKING LOGS, DO A FUCKING INFORMATION LOOKUP, READ THE FUCKING MANUAL.

OH YOU HAVE A QUESTION YOU SAY? PLEASE FOR FUCK SAKE ELABORATE WITH SOMETHING MORE THEN 'Please help me with the pipeline"' WHILE YOUR ACTUAL PROBLEM IS A LACK OF KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING OF GIT, LINUX OPERATING SYSTEMS AND AUTOMATION.

OH YOUR BRANCH IS, WHAT, 3 MONTHS BEHIND MASTER? NEVER HEARD OF A FUCKING REBASE? WHATS THAT YOU SAY??? YOU DONT KNOW WHEN TO SKIP A COMMIT??? ITS YOUR FUCKING CODEBASE! READ THE FUCKING DOCUMENTATION !!!

WHATS THAT? YOU WORK IN VSCODE AND YOU DO T K OW HOW? AGAIN READ THE FUCKING DOCUMENTATION !

Self.end(rant)

Never put more than 1 sentence in an email. People never fucking read more than the first line. Then they fire back an email with questions you already answered. Arghhh bastards.

So I was trying to go to sleep and my phone buzzed around 11:35 and it said someone commented on one of my rants so i went and read it, checked out how high my score was. Read a few rants...then a few more...wrote some comments...maybe one or two more...its almost 1am...

While surfing, I read one article of 45 jokes only programmer will get....

This is the more realistic one:
What do computers and air conditioners have in common??

Ans: Both useless when you open windows

I'm beginning not to trust that "....[read more] " anymore.

So this is how I met my girl on github.
I wanted to built something like a media center, primary for music, but using YouTube as source. I started looking for a lib. Found a broken one. Opened an issue but got a comment: "Can't fix because, you get ... [read more]

I’m happiest about code I deleted.

Deleted code is easy to maintain, easy to read and it makes applications run faster.
Moreover applications take less disk space and are faster to download.

The more happy than about deleted code I’m about deleted software or destroyed computers.

Fuck articles which are nothing more than tweets wrapped in ads and paragraphs which repeat the content of the tweets.

Yeah I know that software version x was released, I just read the fucking tweet! — I googled for more details, which points me at 10 mainstream tech news blogs, which are all in the business of fluffing up three sentences into 6 paragraphs without adding any value.

I wish Twitter just charged royalty fees to embed on for-profit websites.

Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop Getting stuck in a while loop
Getting stuck in a...[read more]

Boss: I don't want you spending more than 30 min looking into the problem.

Me: ok

Go back to desk and read or watch some cs training. Maybe related.

Go back to boss.

Me: going to take (over estimate tome) to fix.

Boss: ok.

Go back to desk and fix in less time than estimated.

Look like gold.

Once a day, take some time to read your colleagues' commits.

You will see how they work, you will learn how they solve problems, you will understand their flow and you will know more and more parts of the code base.

* Go to sleep at reasonable times
* Watch some of those anime I never quite finished
* Read more books
* Become more proficient with rust
* Replace go with rust at work
* Setup a weeb media center I can remotely
* Finally make a personal webpage/blog without overthinking things, to actually get it done
* Find or make a storage solution for all the memes I sto- I mean collected, where I can add tags to find them more quickly. Would love to have them have the tagging be done automatically with machine learning, but I don't think we're quite there yet.

How to troll someone

[read more]

A devrant app patch that shows the full rant ALWAYS instead of Read More...

My new years dev resolutions are:
-Learn more c#
-Change jobs
-Read less reddit while on the clock
-Remember that the index on enums start at 0

FUCK THESE FUCKING ARTICLES THAT MAKE YOU CLICK THROUGH 87290 COCK SUCKING PAGES TO READ THE SHIT. ESPECIALLY WHEN ITS ONLY LIKE TWO PARAGRAPHS WORTH OF STUFF!!

AND FUCK YOU EVEN MORE FOR ALLOWING THESE DISGUSTINGLY LARGE ADS TO TAKE UP NEARLY THE ENTIRE DAMN SCREEN SO ITS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE NOT TO CLICK ONE.

I just wanted to read some shit I didnt know about the Trojan War but now ill neVER FUCKING KNOW BECAUSE IM NOT GONNA CLICK A THOUSAND TIMES THROUGH A MINE FIELD TO FUCKING FIND OUT.

" this page uses cookies"
"We've updated our privacy policy"
*30 sec full screen ad* OR "please turn off your adblocker and refresh"
"Would you like to take a survey?"
"Click to read more"
"You've reached your free articles for the month. Please subscribe!"

Jesus fucking Christ! Is it such a sin to read articles in peace? How does anybody use your shitty site. How does anybody PAY for your shitty site?! Fuck your articles. Why do companies think this is a good model?!

Guy needs to read some excel data...

Decides to write his function like this:

function readCell(){
fopen('filename.csv');
//some more code
fclose();
return cellValue;
}

This function was called multiple times per row of data...

Multiple hundreds of rows...

WHY

@red.

this guy.

has more time to read than stephen hawking.

I have a confession. The "Packt Free Ebook of the Day" is my personal Pokemon Go. I'm now up to 398 books.

And yes, I know that this is more than I'll ever read. I still must have them all!

My favorite part of devRant is that I always feel compelled to [read more]. This is real life. Sometimes a proper rant can't be summed up in a witty phrase or two.

// meta rant
I promise you'll get more ++ if you take a screenshot rather than a picture with your phone. Please - it's not difficult.

I can't read your screen on an awful blurry photo with scan lines.

I can’t even finish a stupi... [read more]

Well I slapped some text into a file and it screamed at me.

Slapped some more text into another file and it didn’t scream at me.

I then watched videos and read books that detailed the slapping of text into files.

Tldr I kinda just taught myself somehow

Who cares about living longer, with more money and not bzing ill? If I had a wish I'd get my oN room of hyperbolic time so I'd get to finish what I want and do stuff I know it'd take YEARS to do (i.e. read everything DC and Marvel ever released)

But most importantly, I would be able to finish my side projects.

Titled my presentation "High Availability Setup", after a moment of thought, I changed it to "High Availability Architecture".

There, I will sound a bit more intelligent when I read it out loud on Monday. 😎😂

As someone who doesn't know a lot about JavaScript, but occasionally needs to create some quick and simple scripts, I swear I'm going to kill someone if I read "just use jQuery" one more time on SO.

I do love u ranters

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Whenever I feel like I’m not good enough at my trade, I come here to read a few rants. While I am a failure, it’s so nice to know there are even more disappointing devs around.

I wish I was a developer so I could relate a little more to these posts, but my basic understanding makes it enjoying to read!

Best AppStore changlog I’ve read all week:

“Temporarily disable sending usage statistics data”

Why? What happened! I must know more!

The more I play with C, the more I realize why many people hate C++.
I like the amount of control and the simplicity. No unnecessary syntax sugar, and the code is very straightforward to read.

Commented all of my code. More than 1000 lines, teacher didn't read it....

Someone ask to me as a security engineer.

Bro : what do you think about most secure way to authenticate, i read news using fingerprint no longer safe?
Me : yes they can clone your fingerprint if you take a photo with your fingerprint to camera.
Bro : so what is the other way to authenticate more secure and other people can't see in picture ?
Me : D*ck authentication is more secure now, other people can't see your d*ck pattern right?

It's funny that you would click, even after your brain tells otherwise... [read more]

I wish all newbies would read clean code. I feel if you understand the concepts you can more easily join an established team and contribute more quickly with less do overs. I realize writing elegant, testable code is like making good whiskey. It takes time.

Would be super cool if the [read more] text was different from the rest in the rant text.

[read more]

my best use of Linux's ability to pipe together commands
git | cowsay | lolcats

I also have a custom bash script written that if the message is longer than 50 lines it writes cuts it off with a '...more' and outputs to a file where I can read the full details if needs be.

Teaching my little sister Mathematics (Grade/Class 12. Not at all easy).

And I can really understand the textbook definitions in the chapters. Back then, I never understood a single line of it.

Am I a more sound mathematician now or reading poor documentations has improved my skill to read complex and minimal contents!

!dev
What the...
Please add more lines. I'm sure I can read this on the fly...
Wait.
This is outside of the piano spectrum. What the fk
(Yes, bass key)

PRIVATE - This is private, nothing here. seriously, there is nothing here. Do not click; I'm not kidding. Definitely no... [read more]

Finally got a job I see myself staying in more than 2 years :) A boss that give us time to write / read blog posts.
Flexible work life.
Working with all the new stuff like dotnet core, docker :)

What you see:
"we gonna build a new application to replace our legacy one"

How to read:
"we gonna make you put more shit in the legacy app whenever we want and still keep asking about the new app you don't have the time to make"

Feature request:
Swipe between rants so you don't have to return to the feed if you read more / comment

The more i use git.. more the fun it is.. Just found out the usage of rebase and cherry-pick.. I have read about the implications of these commands in a shared repo.. But it is fun to use it in a solo repo..

Well, this is a rant about devRant! Sorry.
I like devRant, especially when my internet connection is fast. But when it is not, it is very annoying to wait for a rant to load whenever I click [read more]. I found myself skipping interesting rants that I want to read just coz I don't wanna be waiting doing nothing during the loading screen!
Suggestions for how to improve this:
- Just like facebook and devRant web app, Increase the limit of the text that loaded when loading the rants feed. Not all of it has to be visible in the feed, but when clicking read more, show the rest so I can continue reading the rant while the comments are loaded.
- If not, then like youtube, load the whole rant first from the server when clicking read more before loading the comments.
- (Even for short rants) when clicking on a rant, show the loaded text while fetching the rest of the rant. This way I can at least click the rant, and continue reading till the rest of it (or comments) is loaded.

#1 Take French language lessons to revive my long time ago knowledge.

#2 Read as many as I can books on dev topics

#3 Do more outdoor activities (sports)

#4 Liquidate my fucking bank loan

#5 Buy some nice wheels for my car

#6 Try to socialize more

#7 Be part of aiding childrens in need / abandoned ones

Isn't cryptocurrency unsustainable? The amount of energy used as the blockchain gets longer is like exponential?

I read somewhere recently something the amount of energy used to mine crypto is more than an the power used by Argentina.

When the madness known as "software development" gets me down, I visit DevRant to complain and read about people who have it harder than me.

I just wanted to offer my condolences... Ya'll are so much more fucked than I am. 👍

Devrant is making my coffee breaks more fun.

I think we need some kind of new/unread thingy. I try to read rants but I miss some.

Hi guys I just joined like an hour ago and I have been reading a few comments/stories and I have to say this is awesome! Thanks for sharing, I look forward to read some more stories and share a few of mine too :-)

Tldr: got trolled really hard in a meeting yesterday

So currently, our website has some control elements which are ambiguous to texts posted by users. So I was tasked wi... [read more]

- "We are Vreo, the company who has just invented the next generation of advertising in video games."
- Oh, cool let's read more.
- "We are using blockchains to store data."
- Holy fck why, no, don't.

Tomorrow there are 100 days left in the year. How will you use them?

I will read 10 pages of "CleanCode" every day.

(Blatently copied this from Reddit, but was hoping for more CS related goals)

Man nothing quite like reworking some code to make it 'better' so that nobody has to read it top to bottom to make a change.

And then months later get a request and think "Oh crap that code".... and you go in and find the little hooks you added made a 3 or 4 hour (or more) change into a 15 minute task.

As a person who is more comfortable and relatively a bit experienced with Java I find Python quite nice, easy to read and less typing.

just can't read 'IE is the browser to download other browsers' anymore.. how many times will it be posted? the joke is more than 5years old

Sometimes, rewriting a project can be faster, more time efficient and better to read than trying to fix the single inefficiencies in parts of the code.

Suck my hairy asshole, devs who disable paste for web forms. Or more likely, management softs who read in a trade magazine that paste is bad.

Firefox and Chrome removing FTP support in 2021 was a terrible decision.

Web browsers were simply the more convenient FTP browsers, more than file managers, due to browsers' built-in multimedia capabilities like photo viewing and opening documents, distinct purple highlighting of already opened directories and files, browsing history, familiar mouse shortcuts like middle click for new tab, and no possibility of accidental writes due to a botched drag-and-drop operation or similar.

If I wanted to browse an FTP server in "read-only mode", web browsers used to be the preferred choice.

* You can barely keep your eyes open
* Reading rants becomes impossible
* You decide to go to sleep

Brain uses overload

* You mind is flooded with creativity
* You don't feel tired anymore
* Your phone is suddenly back in your hand

"Brain, why did you so that?"
Brain: "Because fuck you I guess. I wanna read more rants!"

Tinder Tutorial 101:

I don't understand why everybody has issues with matches. Here is what u do:
1) Open Tinder App
2) Spam-Swipe to the right until you have no more swipes left.
3) Wait for matches
4) Separate good from trash.

Ain't nobody got time to read all these profiles

I'm new guy in programming. Sometimes I do compare java with python and I have weird conclusion.

Python code is shorter but for me much more "logical" & easier to read is Java. Maybe it due to fact that I don't understand what is going on under hood so shorter code feels incomplete?

@dfox Can you maybe change the [read more] text color and/or size? It blends in with the rest of the post and sometimes makes it hard to tell there is more to see.

!rant

After two years of learning front end librairies and some javascript my mate just threw me into our java backoffice to help him do the testing.

I read so much shit about java， i was a bit apprehensive... But man the more i learn the more i think code is beautiful.

Well i for the first time am starting in java today and its beautiful as well ;) like，i can`t remember having had so much awe for something in a long time.

I swear why is it always the loudly calling people going into the silent coupe while the rest of the train is literally completely empty. How can you be so smooth brained that you can't read the huge ass sign on the window where it says "SILENT". Nothing can make me more angry

I read somewhere at the start of the global pandemic: when it comes to work from home life, you should never underestimate the benefits of a power nap.

My gods, that person was right! I only wish I had taken advantage of it more over the last year.

Every time I read a team member's code I feel like I get immediately closer to them. Like all of a sudden I see how they think a little more clearly.

!rant

I asked my teacher if i would be allowed to use lists in final exam. (If you read my last rants about him you'll know he has a fetish with arrays) He allowed it! I'm feeling so relieved!
(He changed his mind more than once for the last few weeks, but this time he made a clear decision and he will stick with it. He even promised it.)
No more fear now, I know I can do that 😁

2016 and we still can't copy more than 4GB to a micro-sd card that android can read.

[Read more]

"Someone studied rich people for years and this is the five habits you should start having"

FFS, if I read this headline one more time...

I can’t even wait for my copy of Leviathan Falls to arrive. I’m so tempted to read the All Spoilers thread on Reddit. Aaaaaaaaaaaaa! C’mon... you can do this. Just a couple more days.

I appreciate Ruby so much more now after writing a tiny Assembly + C Grub-compatible kernel and being forced to read libc source code.
The lower levels truly are a dark place.

Just read an article stating you shouldn't buy windows 10 home and should buy pro instead because of 'potential performance increase' due to some of its 'added performance technology'...

Do I need to say more?

!rant is a logic operator, right? As in NOT rant. So why do I so often see them on actual rants?
And for that matter, who cares? If there's a [Read More] tag, you'll click if you want, regardless.
Why is this a thing?

Forced choice between two options which both seemingly have irreversible and potentially destructive consequences. Tapping back or outside the modal doesn't dismiss it. No 'Read more' type link for the first option.

Laws and regulations against dark pattern design when?

edit: okay the readmore link is passable but I still want to be grumpy about it.

I swear my co worker said we were meeting at the data center at 10pm all week! I call him and he says 10:30. Wtf?!!! Well guess I got some time to read more rants.

I need to smash something. Why won’t some people just read? When messaging colleagues at work, I put effort into writing out everything clearly and concisely in order to minimise back and forth. But people just won’t read. I tell them A is precisely this. Then their next question: so precisely what is A?
Do people get secretly paid for exchanging more messages?

Trying to automate gitlab deployment with Ansible. It runs but freaking keeps failing on task. Reconfigure the gitlab server. Without helpful output!

After 2 days bashing and commenting line after line the answer reveals.

True != true Fuuucc...

Why do I read all this crap about magneto recently?
I hate it even more now

> Opened devRant to read some cool rant.
> Scrolled down the feed to find awosm rant.
> Found an interesting rant, touched it to view it.
> Read the rant.
> press back to find more awosme rant but, (boom💥) again on top of feed.😡😡😤
> Now need to scroll down again :/ :(
FIX THIS!!!!

Sometimes when I read old code of mine I'm ashamed. But more often when I read others I just feel better.

(I'm talking about other webdev freelancers, not OS projects or so...)

Today, I got my first recruiter spam (read: unsolicited) email! If they get more common than that, I'll have to build a filter for those.

Being a team lead is watching your members grow more and more while you stay out of date because you don’t have any more time to read and learn what’s new

Why do humanity collect things that they will never use? More importantly why do I have many ebook that I will never read?

A client asks me to produce a Release note when publishing a new version, which is more than fair ask, I shall deliver.

Then he asks me questions on the version's feature which are clearly described in the release note, with examples, showing he did not bother to read it..............

...

!rant
I have been lurking around here for about a month. Finally decided to write about how devRant motivates me. Whenever I read stuff I don't understand it makes me realize I've got so much more to learn. Happy new year :)

read this somewhere on the internet

e=(mc)²

error = (more code)²

guess it's true

Come on devRant! I’m getting really annoyed when clicking on rant that has [read more] at the end since it is a gamble to kill this iOS app you have made. Every ~5th click I get app terminated. Then after I reenter the app, I lost where I was. Thats why I ++ all the rants I have read, even those who don’t deserve it :), so I can scroll quickly and see which are not ++’ed.

I just read some of my old rants and it's no wonder I don't have more likes. Even I had trouble figuring out what I was talking about.

If Apple computers have cores (in their processors), where are the seeds and stems?

Welp this sounds a lot more stupid after having typed it and read it, but I'm still posting it :D

If you think walking on your parents while they're having sex is bad, hear(read) this:
Today I heard my mom asked my dad her email's password, and she's a doctor. Why and how can't you memorize your only password? I mean if she wasn't a doctor this situation would be more believable.

Read it online today
"Hello Google,
You have made great maps. If you could only add one little extra feature which would tell if we should go on the flyover or beside it. How could a man see a half a milimeter deflection on a 5 inch screen.

Your's Truly
A guy who had to take a UTurn after going 2km more"

Be me. Use DDG to search for nearby bowling alleys. DDG provides reviews in form of Yelp. Click "read more" on review. Yelp transfers me to a bogus url, which prompts

"Open in Another App?

Would you like to leave DuckDuckGo to view this content?

No Yes"

And then, without letting me click "No", I get automatically transferred into Yelp's page in the app store, and if I try to go back, I just get redirected again.

Fuck off. I just wanted to read your reviews in the browser. I had no interest of downloading your app just to read a couple of reviews, and I most certa-fuck-inly have no desire to download your shitty app now.

In follow up to my last rant.....

A friend just informed me that I should enable dhcpcd to get networking in arch...

I was typing dchpd......

why don’t I read things more carefully

I’ve been at this for hours and I just installed ubuntu alongside arch because I need my laptop for tomorrow. Ugh

I'm reading 'JavaScript: The Good Parts'. Nearly a quarter of the way through and all I've read about are bad parts. I thought this would make me like JavaScript more, not less!

Good code is like a good video game. When you read it first time, it feels like magic, and you feel like it does more than it actually can.

So, I finally decided to figure out how to fucking close vim! Surprisingly, there is a super easy way to rem...[read more]

I was genuinely baffled by this until I read up more on regex flags and realised that this is the intended behaviour😂

!rant
To all the hardcore Vim users:

Why do you prefer Vim over IDEs ?
Are you faster/more efficient using Vim ?
What are it's main benefits/drawbacks in your view ?

I'm familiar with it, but nothing more than that. Usually use it just for quick and dirty edits, but that's all.
I'm seriously considering making the change to Vim and I can't explain why. Read an article once why Vim is still relevant and some features as to why that is, but I'd like to get more opinions on it.

Do you wanna know the secret to getting people's attention? I could tell you but you'll have to ... [read more]

Read online some time ago that "Rust libraries that have not been updated in a bit are not abandoned, they are practically done"

And I find that beautiful, but because I am more commonly associated with rapid breaking bs a-la JS (among other languages) then I do not know if this makes me anxious or paranoid.

!rant

Just read an article about a blind sofftware developer, who is proficient in way more technologies then me, for example.

He can use certain screen reader and code edor combo to read out the text, and also something called refreshable braille display.

This is so insiprational and only goes to show that there is no excuse whatsoever for a person NOT to learn software developing...

I found a solid solution to get +100's easily!

You just have to:
... [read more]

Hey just noticed the app updated... Looks like a pretty big change but pretty nice. one thing though was wondering. How does it decide the length to show?

I see some posts are really long but others are shorter and get the Read More cutoff

<rant>

When you are asked to implement a fix for a colleague and do so.
Then a half day later you see another colleague change in the git repo, that's using more lines and is harder to read but basically does the same as your version

</rant>

if only i could read the client's mind...
Communication would be much more peaceful

I hate the overuse of arrow function everywhere even for super long expression. that `function` should fit to them more comfortably .

writer of code should aware that it take three time more to read expiration with arrow function inside

Any code should be simple and easy to read / understand.

I just reworked an old stored SQL proc.

Went from 102 lines to ... 10.

More I code, more I realize that maintainability, readability, comments and unit tests are more important than actual code. (And performances ofc. But if 1 line code does it in 1 second and 500 lines code in 0.2 seconds, I’ll take one line solution every time)

Dev read full content if can
.
.
.
.
No u can't go forward...[read more]

Is it just me or are there others who like programming and enjoy the work but just can't do it all day. After 10 hours I don't even want to look at a screen much less code more or read about it.

Inspired by devRant, sent this to a person with a new Apple Watch:

"Hi there, what ar....[read more]"

Moohaha

"Please integrate the Facebook Conversion API into our website".

Is that enough information for a dev to act on? I've been reading up on how FB's Conversion API works but the more I read the less I understand what my clients wants. Or what I am supposed to do.

Google bloody captcha.

It works fine, until you have more than one form on a page then the complexity increases by 100000%.

Finally my colleague gets it working then I read an article that says bots use Google own speech recognition service to defeat it. Fun times.

*Task too simple but says "discuss about it"*

*I'm weary of its simplicity, it seems deceptive*

Me: hey, about this thing to discuss, what about it? Is there something I need to know about that I don't?

Boss: read the code

*I'm now even more weary of the task*

music, and ranting against youtube for their weird autoplay features. How in the world can they go from Korn - Twisted transistor to Bonjovi ????

Beer at night, that really helps me, except after the 4th, i start to make shit code, and read devrant even more xD

I work for an big company that owns a social media website. One day I worked on the CSS of that side an changed...
[read more]

Classmate: I'm done with this

I read his code

Me: Good. But could you make that a little bit more.. readable?

Classmate: Eh..what?

Me: Or use one or two lists less.. and the naming

Classmate: But I need them all!

It's a square around a coordinate within given borders, not rocket science.

* Don't abandon projects
* Read a bit every day
At least one chaper of a normal
book and one volume of manga
that's written I a language I still have
problems with
* Learn to write better code, better software architecture
* Fly to japan
* Get a driver license
* Rise again in Osu!
* Tell everyone I use Arch Linux
* Get a job or start freelancing
* watch the animes I always wanted to watch
* Find more awesome musicians and genres to listen to
* Build a desktop pc

Maybe I'll comment some more if I can think of some

I really hate it when people ignore the messages I sent on slack

I don't mention you or the damn @channel for show

There is some shit that needs to get done, and I even hate it more when they ask me for something I already said on slack

Whaaaaat, you can't read now

USING FUNCTIONS MMAKES MY CODE EASER TO READ BUT FOR THE SAKE OF EVREYTHING IBM AND LINUX DOING NETWORKING FUNCTIONS WITH MORE THAN ONE JOB FEELS LIKE RIPPING YOUR TOENAILS OFF!

TLDR; read the last alinea, my train just arrived and I am typing this after the resr of the rant

So lately there's been a lot of hate on here to PHP, which for now I'd say feel offended if you want to, but fuck all of the guys hating on a language without personal experience or even just plain "I used it for a week or less"-experience.

Noticed I said "a", yes I am not just talking about hate on PHP. It's pretty much the stupidest thing one can do, exclude a programming language you might like more than you will think at this moment. I present to you; My first few weeks of internship last year.

So last year I had to find a company to do an internship at with two classmates, none of them replied with a come over for a talk except a company mainly working in Laravel (PHP).

All of us didnt like php at the time, me possibly even hating it the most, but that didnt keep us from taking the leap of faith and just going to the company for a talk, I mean it couldnt hurt right?

So after the talk we had a place for an internship, which we all thought we were all going to hate, because of PHP.

Now a few weeks into the internship (3 / 10 weeks I'd say) we had basically just gotten done with the first setup of the project we had to build. And we noticed after a good 2 or 3 weeks that it didn't feel like too much of a different language.

Personally I even found it better than C# or Java, which were the only other languages I knew at the time.

Now keep in mind I still like C# and Java, allthough guven the chance I'll choose PHP everyday over both.

But I learned more things I was expecting to learn those 10 internship-weeks, with the one thing I am writing about being the main focus:

Stop hating, try the language out for at least a week (yes 5 * 8 hours) and then make an educated decission based on your findings throughout the week, you might be surprised...

What should i do more to get people to read posts properly?????

I want to read a good Software Engineering book. A modern one, which contains new agile approaches, useful diagrams, etc. Not the classical, not so useful, class diagram.

What do you recommend? I'm currently more into web and mobile apps, and I want to be able to describe my backend and frontend with useful diagrams which describe better to users and other developers my desired design.

The senior iOS dev I was working with in my first job after uni - he showed me so many objc tricks and his self-written libraries to make working with UI stuff in swift more concise, it blew my mind. At the same time, he was very humble and calm, and had a funny humor at times. Also his code and the architecture in an older app we needed to work on was super easy to read and understand. That's why I want to be more like him - and eventually grow a beard :-)

I'm getting more and more fed up with my fellow colleagues who encounter errors in the execution of their code and come to me like bumbling idiots..." I don't know ow what's wrong ... It's not working"

DID YOU READ THE FUCKING ERROR MESSAGE? I GUARAN-DAMN-TEE IT TELLS YOU EXACTLY WHAT'S WRONG! YOU KNOW WHAT...EVEN IF ITS NOT 100% CLEAR GOOGLE IT. BET YOU FIND THE ANSWER

To add insult to idiocracy...I recently over heard grumblings of being displeased at current level - fuck off you lazy ass child - if you can't read an error and Google for the damned solution in today's era search engines and developer assistance, you don't deserve to call yourself a "Senior Developer"

People like to act like there's some great secret to becoming a competent developer...I'm posit over half is simple reading comprehension

I recently read that great programmers care more about algorithms than code. I hope I can find more time to devote to learning algorithms than spending it on yet another framework. #springboot.js

Whoever I see read more... I skip 🙄🙄

That moment when there are no more new rants, you check algo, latest and read all top and you just sit there lookong at the screen...

(inner self: start working on your side projects !!!!)

If your commit message is more than 15 words you should probably just write it down and read it to your therapist

Have you bought or read more books in your life? I'm the latter. When it comes to IT books, I only read half, many times overlapping information

Do you also get upset if things are not as they appe...[read more]

Someone has to start manufacturing quality HUD glasses...
Imagine the possibilities and comfort...
no more neckpain from crouching above your laptop/tablet/smartphone, imagine the navigation systems, imagine you could read messages, articles, code, watch videos whatever you are doing, even work on your code with some kind of keyboard (or with speech recognition)
I want this soo bad..

Rm -rf /usr/share/pacman/*...

It took me 5 more attempts to re-read the command I wrote and realise what I had done... This was under a week ago..

Finish my only pet project;
Learn a new compiled language;
Get better at functional programming;
Read more books about networks and software engineering;

Sometimes in life it's not what you see, not what you want b...[read more]

For fuck sake, stop complaining about the number of js libs. There is just as many if not more c/c++/c#/java/python/ruby/php... libs.

Just because they are available on npm or github, it doesn't mean you have to fucking see/read/use it

@dfox

How hard would it be to stylize the "[read more]" part of rants that get too long?

Here's a short test to see if you are good at debugging [read more]

How about a feature so that when you click "[read more]" there is something showing where that last view ended. It's hard to continue reading without searching through the rant.

If you don't have enough curiosity to read and know more about technology and how to implement new stuff then i have very bad news for you

So a guy who is on team team and making more money then me and has just been offered a promotion just suggested I open a json file using MySQL...yes you read that correctly your eyes are not broken

This book I'm reading on SEO is like drinking nightquil.

The more I read the harder it gets to not pass out.

Okay here we go again...
Do you how to check idiot scrolling and looking for something....Its very simple, you just need to s...[Read more]

I don't save computer resources... I mean come on, there is a hundreds of gb RAM, dosens of cores, who cares if code has some line more if it's more easy to read...

Devranters, you should make your products available on local stores in Asia, esp India. Like on Flipkart. I seriously need a 'stress ball' 🤔. I read it can help me stress more. Hence rant more! Not a coincidence

1) Having the opportunity to read and write the future, with no one telling you that you can't

2) feeling superior to non-techies because as this world gets more and more digital every day, you have more potential to control them or make them dependent on you

3) hopefully the AI overlords will be more peaceful to programmers because we created them....

In a class right now. The rants are more interesting than what the professor is teaching!
How our professors teach:
Step 1: Open up a PDF of the subject book.
Step 2: Read everything line-by-line.
Step 3: "Refer the internet".

Yeah, because I don't have the book to read the shit you're teaching.

! Rant
Even after seeing it's less than twenty words and less than three lines my fellow devs managed to...[read more]

It's been a while since I started my first python course on Udemy.

I feel the urge to rant because as I'm leaning more and more and getting increasingly more interested in the subject, the instructor's tone is getting sloppier and sloppier and the quality of the videos is increasingly worse. Really, the videos are so blurred that I cannot read what the guy writes, so I have to turn the captions on hoping that he says out loud everything he types.

Fuck.

read this somewhere , the new file viewer in Linux is "less" which is improved upon older "more". Because it's philosophy is , "less is more" 😒

Hey guys, how would you rate iOS vs Android for privacy? I read recently that Android pulls up to 10x more data off of your phone (for data mining) than iOS and that overall, iOS is really the mobile OS of choice when privacy and control of your data is a priority.

Anyone have any hard evidence to support this?

More linux driver woes:

Driver is passed a file position and byte count when asked to read from a device. Sounds easy, right? FUCK no.

For reads, driver is passed struct `filp` with field `f_pos`, a direct pointer to the same struct field, int `count` as a number of bytes to read, and `buf` to return those bytes with. Problem is, requesting, say, 256 bytes from location 10000000h will give the driver `filp->f_pos = 0`, `f_pos = 256`, and `count = 0`. I don't know how to fix this and there's NO help for this shit. None whatsoever.

This shit, right here, is why Linux drivers suck ass.

With the advent of everything being a service (read AWS, GCP, Azure) do you think it's time for our education curriculum to incorporate these services at a an earlier stage (say undergrad) since in the industry, this is kind of enough to make a decent living (speaking more from a devops perspective, programmers are still needed I feel)??

Hey guys, who has experience with JPA/hibernate RESTful performance numbers.
Interesting would be:
* persistence operations per second, and the response times
* proportion between read/write for a typical rest service

Rightnow i get ~300ms read, 900ms write at 350 concurrent requests. 75% write operations

I more or less ruled out my custom code, problem seems to be hibernate (of course ...😋)

Stack: jetty, jackson, hibernate, mysql

Hello my fellow DevRanters! 😁 A question for those of you who like to learn new stuff constantly, what are your tricks or tips you use to learn more? and enjoy the overall experience (do you write notes, read posts, etc) my reason to ask this is that oftentimes I forget everything I learned after 5 minutes, so maybe I'm doing something wrong

Has anyone read any research papers looking into the application of differential cryptanalysis to blockchains and mining, and if so, could you point me in the right direction?

I'm bored and looking for something interesting to read on my day off. More importantly I'm ignorant enough of the subject to entertain the possibility that there might be some possible (if not plausible) cross-pollination of ideas between the two domains.

We have a company policy that nobodys allowed to make me read/listen to more than 20 words at a time.

learn to use redux with async actions and find out that there redux-sagas and re-read more documentation.

I've been reading more books. The more I read, the more knowledge deficit I feel I have. It's an impostor syndrome circle.

One day death might free me from this misery but until then *opens another book on another programming paradigm.*

Realizing that C# is far more easier to read than Java - I'll never take a job for that shithole/shithouse language in the industry (lmfao). I barely touch either...

How much shit am I gonna get from people for this? Larry Ellison's fanboys are gonna crucify me. I'm suicidal anyway lol