QA: It's not working.
Me: Are you getting 503 errors?
QA: No, just the one.

*came in this morning to see this conversation in slack from the remote teams*

Dev: Hey guys, I'm trying to push to the develop branch, telling me its locked. Is there a new process?

Lead dev: Yes I locked it because the repo is now dead, the last release that went out is the last for this year and ever for this app. Were merging this app with another, starting from the last release's code. We'll all have to swap over to the new repo soon.

Dev: ... eh ok I didn't put anything in the last release branch as it wasn't urgent. Normally our process is anything in /develop goes out in the new year. I've been merging to /develop for the last few weeks ... is that code now gone?
*14 question mark emoji reactions*

Lead dev: Yes
*27 angry emoji reactions*

Engineering manager: WHAT? when was this decided? When was it communicated?

Lead dev: oh I assumed my product counterpart had been spreading the messages around, have they not?

Several teams: no, nope, first i'm hearing of it.

Lead dev: Ok, i'll ask them what happened. Be aware then that most of the stuff thats going into develop now, most likely won't be allowed in until March. They want to prioritise releasing this new merged app and don't want anything to impact it.

Dev: So wait, i'm working on stuff now. What do I do? Where do I base the branch? Where do I merge?

<no response>

*My team comes into the office*

Dev: eeehhh ... what does this mean for our past 4 weeks of work? and all the stuff needed to go out in January?

Me: not.a.fucking.clue

Client: I want the best.
Me: *starts designing a complex and pretty neat website*
Client: I don't like that. I want this. *shows me website design from 1998*
Me: *cries myself to sleep*

Manager: The thing you working on. We need this now! Like end of the week.

Me: Desirability is not do-ability.

Manager: く( ・◇・)ヾ？

Me: I am still in the middle of figuring out how to do things in the first place, so there are some technologies to research and some problems I yet need to solve. I am in no state to just write down my solution. I don't even have enough information to even estimate how long it is going to take. I am getting there. And yes, I can rush things, but need I remind you that you want solid data as a result that actually means something? As this is *why* this whole project was started. We have some old project doing the exact same thing, but whose output we don't trust. I wonder how that came to be. Additionally, this whole project was on hold for months until I took over. So I neither understand nor accept this sudden sense of urgency. And by the way, you recently added manpower to this project. And adding manpower almost always decreases the productivity in the beginning due to on-boarding and communication overhead. Last Monday, I didn't write a single line of code due to that. So no, this week will not do, as I am also on vacation starting on Thursday that was requested and was approved by you at the beginning of the year. See you in January.

Something that I'm utterly ashamed of.

Had to add text message and call communication functionality in one of the products.

Boss shrunk the deadline to two days ETA.

Didn't know jackshit about twilio.

Meeting with client:

Client - So the communication thing is done right?
Me - Yyeahhh
Client - Let's try it then. *Calls himself*
Me - *Calls the API directly from my phone*

Client got out happy. Nobody knows what actually happened there. I didn't even talk to my colleagues about this. Boss gave me bonus to pull of the impossible. I added the feature after a week of the incident.

So, I'm programming a control system for a prototype aerospace vehicle. You know, the stuff that needs to work to prevent falling out of the sky.

Anyway, test day was today (was -- not anymore). Wiring all the electronics, everything is actuating and works well. Except for one part, a little thruster for stability.

I spent hours - literally, fucking hours - trying to fix the problem. Wrong address? Wrong syntax? I had absolutely no clue what was wrong. Queue the hardware guy, $stupid:

$stupid: "How have you not got it working yet?!"

$me: "I don't know, everything I'm trying isn't working. I've spent hours digging through this code and nothing is fucking working."

$stupid: "Well have you set it up for the new thruster?"

$me: "What...What new thruster?"

$stupid: "Oh, the one we installed this morning, did noone tell you?"

WHY WOULDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS?! COMMUNICATION 101!

Trying out on my own, then googling the problems, finally watching a 2h documentary on zebra communication on youtube.

So today I found out I'm a Senior Developer. Was I told nope. Just found it on my contact details on the company address book. Ask boss about it he said yes I am. Would have been nice to have been told I was promoted...

Just had a meeting with clients...
Accurate as fuck.

This conversation gonna be very very interesting 😆

I'll update further info in comments.

# Day 0:

Me: "Hey boss, I want to let you know that I need this kind of information from the customer for these features, otherwise I cannot finish the project's milestone in two weeks."

Boss: "OK, just continue as far as you can get. We have to get this finished."

Me: "Well, I cannot go any further for these tickets. I need that input. Shall we leave them in todo?"

Boss: "OK."

# Day 7:

Boss: "Whe didn't you start on these tickets in todo?

Me: "As I have told you, I need some information."

Boss: "We gotta get this out of the door!"

Me: "Yes, if we want to meet the deadline, we should. Yet I cannot guess the feature. Also, let me create a column: `to clarify` and move that ticket there. As I have said: I need that information. You have to contact the customer about it and get their feedback.

Boss: "OK."

# Day 13:

Boss: "Why isn't this project finished? There are still tickets open."

Me: "You never provided the information I asked you about."

Boss: "I want an explanation not an excuses."

Me o_O: "This is the explanation. I was asking you on multiple occasions about the required feedback. You never provided it. See the columns name? It's called `to clarify`. We created it last time together. That clarification never happened even though I told you that I need it. I cannot do magic. I can only implement features, and while I can sometimes make intelligent guesses to their use cases, I rather implement their actual ones than my fictional ones.

Boss: "You should have told me."

Me: ಠ_ಠ

!rant

Communication with a new RFID-Reader:

"Hello RFID-Reader" - "何?"

Okay: "ハローリーダー" - "¿Qué?"

Seriously? "Hola lector RFID" - "Что?"

Wait a minute...
[puts wire into *correct* port of the development system]

"Hello RFID Reader" - "Hello"
- - -

It's been a long day and the brain is obviously the first thing to go to sleep... even when you're still awake.

Dev of other system : Oh hey, we're implementing a change to this part of the system, will it affect you at all?
Me: Sure, I'll check it out. When are you planning to go live?
Other Dev : Oh it went live yesterday...

🤬😭

When you make a joke online please remember to add a smiley or lol at the end so in a couple of years - when the world controlling AI is judging you by scanning all your digital communication history - it will know when you were kidding.

P.S. super AI If you are reading this - I love robots !

Product Owner: "Our definition of done is putting it on production. So you are only done if it's on production. Otherwise our sprint goal is failed."

So we put it on production.

After deploy, some content manager appears: "Why is the system doing things? I was told this should not happen today."

"Erm, we have put the feature on production as we are only done if it's on production."

"Well, yes. But it should not be live yet!"

Oh well. Communication, or the lack thereof, does never fail to amaze me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

PM: We really need to solve this problem fast...

Me: So you want me to solve the element width or to reimplement the template?

PM: Yes! (and leaves before I can say anything)

Me: *poker face*

Downsides of working from home: No team, communication is just horrible, endless calls that move nowhere

Upsides of working from home: Whiskey

!rant && sarcasm

For a long time now I've been trying to convince people to use secure communication. I'm used to getting called "paranoid", but the killer phrase always was (and still is): "Why do you want me to encrypt my communication, I HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE, so I don't care who's reading it" - "It's not about hiding something, it's about private stuff staying private" - "Yeah, whatever"

"I have nothing to hide". That always killed the conversation... until I asked them to hand me their phones, unlocked, for 5 minutes.

"No" - "Why? I thought, you had nothing to hide and don't care who's reading it?" - "Uhmmm..."

More and more people around me are popping up in my Signal contact list.
Looks like they suddenly care a lot about private stuff staying private </sarcasm>

Yes! communication is key, but you gotta give me a little more to work with here.

Programming is one way communication from your past self to your future self.

I am DONE with this woman CONTINUED!

I didn't think I'd have to put another rant about this stupidity at least not this soon but she just keeps on giving!

I have my noise canceling headphones on most of the time and when I want to hear the people around, I just put the right earcup of it to the side of my ear so the music pauses. Today we had a huge disrupt on our services because of a network switch error on the hub. I was also trying to focus on my coding as I didn't wanna do a stupid mistake on the last working day and be sorry about it in the next week.

So this woman sneaks up on me from behind calling my name - meaning she has a question, surprise! -, I say 'yes' moving my head to her side ever so slightly without getting my eyes off of my screen stating subtly that I'm also listening to her while trying to focus on my shit. She starts yelling at me 'look at me!' out of nowhere! I turn my head and ask what the problem is and she asks why I'm not looking at her face! Stupid moron, I might not be too good in understanding your way of communication but you are the one asking so you WILL wait if you'd like to hear answers.

I say I'm working on something and her answer is again 'Why aren't you looking at my face it's going to be quick bla bla did we do this like that?' and I answered I didn't remember because there's no way I'd ever remember without looking further and it was no lie.

This woman clearly has stability issues and everyone else seem to be tolerating it. It's now obvious as I'm not tolerating the nonsense I'll be the one that 'she only has ever had a problem with'.

I was quick to de escalate the situation but now I'm thinking maybe I should've responded in a way that she could understand. I wouldn't ever give a shit about it but this is getting ridiculous.

A senior developer come to interrupt me.

Senior developer: blah...blah....blah about this concept...... that concept... So, any new things you learn lately that you would like to share?

Me: I am learning back C++
Immediately he stop me and said, "Why did you learn C++? It is obsolete, no one use it anymore"

Me (in my head): But, you just said what I learn. It doesn't matter if its obsolete or not. Infact you are wrong, C++ is not obsolete anytime soon. I was about to share on webassembly.

Senior developer: So, would you like to join me in a short sharing session this afternoon.

Me: No thanks, I am really busy (just want to avoid at any cost)

Dear self,

If you start a statement with “I think”, you do not have to also edit statement to add “in my opinion”. This is redundant and silly.

Sincerely,
Why are you so freaking timid?

I switched to Comic Sans for any internal communication.
Those in delivery/support/sales/HR/emotional crap/professional buzzworders/etc no longer take me seriously and therefore I no longer waste my time with their BS.

If not an improvement in the more materialistic side of the career itself, certainly an improvement in the quality of life.

!Rant
You know one of the things I love about this community is?
We have such a diverse group of people and even when those who don't speak English natively, they try to on the app as much as possible keeping it consistent. Even when they make some mistakes, no one's a dick about it (from what I've seen), which is awesome!

JuniorDev: <<moves bug ticket to 'done'>>

FullStackClown: Ah nice, let's see what they've written here as to what the problem was <<reads comment in ticket>>

JuniorDev's Comment: "👍"

FullStackClown: 🤦‍♂️

About to walk into a second round job interview. It will take my commute from an hour and a half to 15 minutes, be a much larger scale company and teams, with actual schedules and communication. I might actually cry if I get it.

When the Marketing team runs a promotion focusing on a feature you're about to remove.

When you work remotely and communication from your boss or coworkers sucks and you're paranoid that they think you arent doing anything since they dont check in with you.

Actual conversation today with one of my remote developer teammates in Ukraine

Me: "next up I'd like to discuss the 'bigger picture' so you have context for the next tasks..."

Dev (after an hour or so and some chat in between...): "Yes, could you please send more details about a large images issue?"

Me (somewhat perplexed): "what are you... oh! Haha"

😂😂😂

Difficult communication with it guys!!!

My company decided to stop remote working because of a lack of communication exactly 30 minutes after we talked about how communication was improved since the lockdown.

It definitely helps to not be proud, especially to talk to people.

I was about to refactor something someone did, without understanding their intentions and because I thought it was incorrect.

Thank God I got off my high horse to talk to them first!

If you are shy or bad at approaching people (like me), just force yourself and try.. You will eventually learn to be less hesitant.

Got an email earlier this week. It went something like this:

"It looks like your team still hasn't delivered the logging and monitoring solution that we asked for. Can you get it done in time for our production deployment next Friday?"

Um, wait, excuse me, WHAT?

1. You never actually asked for the thing you claim we didn't deliver. In fact, when we brought up the fact that you should probably have some monitoring set up for your servers, you said it would be handled entirely by your own team.
2. I HAVE BEEN WORKING ON THIS PROJECT FOR SIX MONTHS WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOUR DEADLINE UNTIL NOW
3. I won't even have time to start working on this until the Monday after your prod deployment date. Sorrynotsorry.

I really shouldn't be surprised though. This project has been a clusterfuck from the very beginning so this is just par for the course.

DATA COMMUNICATION BETWEEN SERVER AND AN APP..

1. Write all data into files,
2. Make the files as zip,
3. Send the zip to server,
4. Server will unzip the zip file,
5. Read all the data line by line from the files and update the data.

** TRUST ME, THIS IS A PRODUCTION APP I HAVE SEEN FROM A CLIENT **

Tester commenting in a Jira ticket:
"Not testable"

Me thinking:
"Why? 🤨 Has he been attacked by a tiger or something?"

I was working with this "friend" in a supposedly "partnership" way. He was handling the customer getting all the info for the product and doing all the communication.

fRiEnD: So I talked with the customer, the website will be delivered on 10th of June.

Me: yOu &%@!ing WhAt?!

*he didn't ask before if it would have been possible

So there's this developer I work with. Let's call him Kevin.

I am a UX designer, former Developer from IBM - but I really love design, so I made the switch. My background however, usually makes working with Developers easy.

But not this guy! I provided a clickable prototype complete with code to easily inspect with Dev tools for measurements. I provided mobile references for some screens but not all.

Kevin submits screenshots for me to review the design. Looks nothing like the prototype, so I get out my Wacom tablet and basically draw redlines over the screenshot. "No border here, 22px should be 20px, etc."

His response was:

"I need you to say exactly what you one (want?) each pages and mobile pages to look like, text size of the font, etc.

You did a lot of red marking, so I am asking for clarification."

So basically asking for red line specs. I asked a month ago if he wanted all the mobile screens, or if what I provided was enough along with the style guide. He agreed. So now I'm majorly pissed off.

Maybe it's also the fact that one of the other developers has to hold his hand, because everything he does is bad. 😡 And his lack of ability to articulate a damn sentence effectively drives me crazy. Cherry on top, I suppose.

Would love to bring this up with my boss. ♥️ And suggestions. 😍

The project manager and sales team decided to call a meeting to see how long a project I'm currently working will take to finish. Little did they think to ask the only person working on it.

Tested out my first app and it worked beautifully. I’m a projectionist and I made this to give me a constant visual feed of projector communication connection. Still in development, not ready for deployment yet. But it works!
I’m posting here because although this site did not help me technically, it definitely helped me emotionally. ;)

CEO of previous job, only reachable by email, coming to the office twice a week at best, business trips at no notice, answers every third email, addressing the dev team:
"You need to plan better. A lot of the delays and bugs are due to poor communication and unaddressed issues."

I don't miss that job.

*team worried about Slack conversations being tracked in the company*
Solution: Shared text file over network. Edit and save it for private communication. Best idea ever?

How the Fuck are aliens going to communicate to us, when the protocols we use for communication are all human made?

Mom asked me one question.

How money transfer from one bank to another?

It was longest communication we ever had in few months.

I am happy for that question.
😊😊😊😊

What do u have open when coding?

Me (PHP/NodeJS web development on a Mac):

CODING & TESTING
- MAMP PRO
- PhpStrom
- Navicat (for localhost MySql DB)
- Chrome
- Terminal

COMMUNICATION
- Slack
- Mail
- Messenger (for Google Chat)
- WhatApp Web
- Calendar

NOTE TAKING
- Evernote
- TextWrangler (for quick notes)

Watching the Google I/O 2018 where they are showcasing their AI called Google Duplex, making a call for reservation.
I just realized it has better communication skill than me.

I am pooping for last 20 minutes watching the video.

In my opinion during the past 18 hours devRant has gone from a great resource - to a must have indispensable developer community. It shows the power of Internet communication.

So many new developers arriving are making it so much more fun and valuable. I enjoyed devRant before but now it is amazing.

I am having a tough time keeping up - which is great.

meeting with PM, 1:1
me: well, to be honest, i think there is also some room for improvement concerning communication in our meetings. the discussion culture in our meetings could be more open.
PM: what do you mean? i don't know what you're talking about.
me: well, i feel sometimes that in meetings, you overly challenge what colleagues suggest. on the other hand, it's really hard to argue against what you are saying. what you say is often like engraved into stone and it is hard to argue against that, but the next day you might have changed your mind again and then things are different, but engraved into stone again.
PM: hmm. can you give me some more concrete example?
me: well... (gives some examples) it's just that it would be nice if you would listen more to what people say in meetings and try to understand what they actually mean or want to say, instead of saying "nah, that's not how we do it" or "no, that's wrong"... just.. well, have more trust in our skills, try to find out what people mean before you discard what you think they said... a bit more of appreciation and openness.
PM: oh, i can tell you, i'm the MOST open manager in this whole company.
me: ...
PM: but anyway, i will think about it.
me: well... okay. also i see there are some challenges within our team concerning intercultural communication. i mean, communication between Germans and Indians is in general a bit problematic in our company, and maybe it is a good idea to have some workshop together concerning intercultural competences... i think we could benefit from that. (what i actually meant is, these problems exist, but currently i see them more on his side or between him and Indian colleagues, because e.g. he tends to harshly criticize people in daily standups, and if we "direct" Germans already feel affronted by his behavior, how must Indian guys feel about it? in fact, 2 Indian devs already left the project. also communication doesn't really work well, in a way that there's often a great mismatch between his expectations and what Indian devs actually think they have to do)
PM: i can tell you, i really understand our Indian colleagues, i really know how to work with them. also, their working style has greatly improved since project start. (which doesn't feel quite right after he totally ripped apart the work of one guy in the last sprint review meeting)

of course, that's not the whole conversation, but it's kind of a symptomatic example for the whole situation...

!rant example of effective cross-language communication. A Drake meme can save up to 140 characters on avg.

Should I actually look into getting a dev job..?

*I have a high school diploma (graduated three years early)
*College dropout (3-4 months, Computer Science - Personal Reasons)
*No prior work experience.
*Good textural communication skills, poor verbal communication skills.
*Currentally unemployed. (NEET :P)

*I have extensive personal experience with Java, and Python. Some Lua. Knowledge of data generation, parsing, Linux, Windows, Terminal(cmd & bash), & Encryption(Ciphers).
*Math, but very little algebra/geometry (though, could easily improve these).
*Work best under preasure.

Remote only.

Think anyone would hire me..?

Conversing with developers can be frustrating.

Here is a good one from today. 2 people 1 women (let’s call her W) and one man (let’s call him M)

W: “Hey guys! Our team is looking for lots of great developers. Front end, back end, data, dev ops. At above market salaries with a great team! Reach out to me is you want to chat. I would love to hear from you.”

Translation: I have a great offer and want to help others achieve and strive in their careers.

M: “also, guys/less-gendered-alternative plz” proceeds to chastise this women about using the word guys.

Translation: I have no level of social awareness, but I have a need to feel big and important. So I’ll take offence for those who aren’t offended to make me feel better about my lack of fucking personality.

————

I’m not really concerned about opinions about the gender issue. It isn’t about that.

It’s just tiring dealing with these people’s bullshit.

It’s time to grow up folks, stop arguing on the fucking internet.

————

I also once saw a developer chastise 2 women we worked with while we were out for drinks for the exact same thing; using the word guys.

He was so busy “defending” them from themselves that he ended up making them uncomfortable and then they left.

He was saying “don’t exclude women” while fucking excluding the only women there.

What a fucking douche.

Amazing how people misuse the term technical debt.

A bug is a flaw in your design/development.

Tech debt is a conscious decision/tradeoff, which is often tracked and removed as the product matures.

The difference is subtle. Avoid this mix up at least in written communication.

Right, I've been here before.
Our app requires an internet connection, and one of our clients wants to roll it out on a strictly managed network.
We told them which addresses our app communicates with and their network team opened them up for traffic. Should work, right?
Nope, doesn't work.

So I request them to use Fiddler to do some debugging of the network traffic, and lo and behold, it does work when Fiddler is active.
One important detail is that Fiddler uses it's own SSL certificate to debug HTTPS communications. I've had moments where expired certificates were the cause of things not working and running Fiddler "fixes" this because of their own certificate.

So I point this out in numerous mails to their network team, every time I get a response saying "nah, that can't be it".
I keep insisting "I have had this before, please check if any installed Root CA Certificates is expired"
At this point I'm certain they have updates turned off on these machines, and their certificates must not have been updated for a long time.

At one point they come back to me. "Hey, when Fiddler is off, WireShark shows the app communicating with ICMP calls, but when it's on it shows HTTP calls instead".

...YOU'RE THE SUPPOSED NETWORK EXPERTS?! You think data can be send via ICMP? Do you even know what ICMP is? Of course you'll see ICMP calls when the network is rejecting the packages instead of HTTP calls when everything's fine.
(ICMP is used to communicate errors)

I'm trying to keep my patience with these guys until they find exactly what's wrong because even I am somewhat grasping at straws right now. But things like this makes me doubt their expertise...

Partner of ours claimed they are going to update their api. No breakage. My hopes were low and they did not disappoint.

Soon after the new version of their api went live, of course, loads of breakage. And the email contact with them is really fun.

Me: "Hello, since your update we get the issue A. Here's the complete communication."

Them: "We did not change the existing behavior. You are doing X wrong. Repeat that one call during the step and you should be fine."

Me: "Thank you, if I repeat the call, it does indeed work, albeit slower, since we are now repeating calls. Furthermore, our application was consuming your api for years and we did not change anything. So why is that step necessary now? Only after your update do our logs show errors from your API. And by the way, we now also have a issue with B. Why is that?"

Them: "Oh that's because your query the endpoint with "Fnord", try "Baz".

Me: "Yes, I do know that we query it with "Fnord" as that is what a previous endpoint of yours is responding to us. Why are we getting "Fnord"? What request do I have to make to get a "Baz" back?"

It feels like a game of wackamole. Squash one issue, ten more will pop up. I am one step away from becoming active-aggressive.

I am one of those individuals who can't understand a word someone is saying to me if there is any loud background noise - e.g. other people talking near me. That frustrated me so much in the past, nowadays I just say loudly and politely I can't understand a damn word because someone near me is talking a bit too loudly.

Implementing Slack in the company really helped improve general communication between the two offices.. That was until we were told not to use it because there's a 10,000 message history limit on the free version and 'important documentation' was being lost... FML

!rant

Hi from the 33rd Chaos Communication Congress!

So mixing it up a little today, Ranting about devs... actual drawing from a dev to a designer.

*Client calls and asks for a restful api in php*
Me: So the client called and asked for a restful service specifically in php
Co-worker: I'm gonna write it in python.
Me: *disowns co-worker*

The best kind of team work.

Communication.

I started coding at Engineering school (so like 4 yrs ago) and even if there were projects by group, I kinda learned it all the way by myself so I actually learned to code alone. And to resolve my issues alone.

And it costs me a job right after my internship. Was a big problem since I was almost alone (someone worked also on it but they was on multiple project at the same time so not 100% available).

That was one of my biggest fear in my career and one of my biggest challenge too in my personal development.

And so, like 8 months later, I got a job, I'm in a big team and no more problem of communication. That's something I'm very proud of. But I'm still young in my career.

I was looking for an single line ascii hug to let a Paizo (publisher of Pathfinder) employee know that he is going above and beyond with the communication because of delayed orders (delayed by Amazon).

Then I found the site on the screenshot. Guess they focused so much on the single line ascii art that they forgot to check the header :D

Another guy on DevRant wanted to make an RPG.

After 2 months of slow communication, we never coded anything, because he couldn't decide what he wanted the game to be about.

I asked one of my engineering classmate which processor they had in their laptop.

Ans : 3GB.

I dont know whether they dont know a shit about computers or they are too bad at english.

My partner can't wrap her head around why I write all forms of communication in a formal matter, whether it be an email, bug report or text message.

I keep telling her you never know who you are actually talking to unless your face to face, anyone else agree with this logic?

Releasing a new shipping console.
Every day I've told them to let me know when ANYTHING goes wrong.

I released it last week on Tuesday.

Yesterday.. they came with some missing options. Ok fine. I fixed them. Then repeated the same sentence: Let me know DIRECTLY when ANYTHING goes wrong!

Today, I planned to leave early and tomorrow I have a day off.

30 min before I leave;

hi, something's wrong, I told X yesterday.

GOD FUCKING DAMNIT;!!!!!

I have a rule of thumb.
No call on private phone number.
Definately no reply on whatsapp...
Dare adding me on any WhatsApp group.
No communication beyond slack and Google meet.

People need to classify things between professional and personl communication medium.

My manager just shared a screenshot of our internal communication with a third party vendor on an official email 🤦🤦🤦

In job description :
.....
- You should have a good communication skills .
....

At the company:
JUST FOCUS ON WRITING CODE , No useless conversation

Love it when testers loose there shit and take loads of screenshots, arrows everywhere, the lot...
But no explanation of what they are actually trying to show.
😂

1. Send the contract for a new project to the customer
2. They inform you that the project is canceled
...
...
3. Receive the contract signed by the customer
...
4. ???
5. PROFIT

Best lock ever... not #33c3

- Learning a lot of new shit because I don't want to get stuck. Remember, if you're the smartest person in a room/group, you're in the wrong group.
- Create a server and a client for a variation of MultiCube with up to 10 clients, with communication being done via UDP. Yes, I spend way too much time on my cubes.

The display in public communication bus, a pretty detailed timetable

Working from home is a shitshow when the collagues is shit with communication

Was doing white listing and asked for the address they need whitelisted. Was given the street address 😐.

I HATE automated messages on Slack

Remove fucking GitHub updates, Jira updates, all this stupid bullshit that pollutes actual communication between humans in all that fucking shit and makes me miss actual messages because I ignored a channel where that garbage cancer shit was set up on?

What's wrong with going to fucking Jira and GitHub and checking how things are going THERE?

:-)

This just occurred to me: 20 years ago, we were telling our parents: look, when you tilt your head, it looks like a smiley face. We use these instead of facial expressions.

In another 10 years, we may be telling our children: look, when you tilt your head, it looks like a smiley face. We used these instead of emoji.

So I work for an ISP in the customer support center and we use slack for communication... As you can tell by my starred channels; we do plenty of work...

(Yes, potato is dedicated to nothing but potato)

why do so many programmers have so little regard for grammar/syntax, spelling and formatting when it comes to written communication?? it's not as though you can get away with ignoring their analogues when coding!

Soon I will be talking about a new communication protocol between Raspberry Pi and Arduino ... At the meeting ... IoT enthusiasts.

I am excited and slightly upset.

Leave developers in a room long enough and they'll drop verbal communication in favour of irc/slack/discord

A client of ours renewed their SSL certificates without prior notice.
The app we developed for them uses SSL pinning.
The app does not include the new certificates.
The entire userbase is hereby locked out of the app.
Fun times ahead 🙃

Signal

for making secure communication easy to use, accessible to everyone and open-source

Someone asked me to make a "public and open private communication network for spy agencies"

The worst thing that could actually happen: I was working with a designer on a side project which wanted to build and see it grow. Everything went good until... He stops the communication without any reason!
and because of us working remote from each other there was no way of finding out why...

The project died :(

tfw your english is too bad to even rant :-(

I am sad, I am not getting paid for last month's work as it was some "mis-communication" and my contract was available till August! 2 options

> set opacity of the website in such a manner it partially shows anything
> set the website on fire

Jared wtf were you thinking! He is a wild man 😊 Final 5 minutes thru rolling credits was very cool.
Lot of communication and usability lessons to be learned during the episode.

Season finale next week. Can't wait!

Habit I'm trying to fix?
Doing it all myself. I've been timeboxing my problems and forcing myself to ask instead of forcing myself to just figure it out myself. Communication isn't my strong point.

Had annual appraisal meeting today. Been in this company for 2yrs now, after being hired outta college. It happens first after 2 years, then yearly.

I have long since known that my boss is a scumbag. My lucky college mates got assigned to great managers, leaders I must say, while I got the typical, know it all boss.

Now this racist, motherfucker, for reasons unknown to me, has mostly disliked me. But hey, the feelings mutual but I don't ever go busting his ass.

Previous employees eventually transferred locations or departments. But I stuck coz I respected some colleagues and learnt a lot from them.

Now this nutjob gave me a 2/5 rating. Says I need to improve my communication. I need to talk more. WTF you goatfucking cunt! I decide how much I wanna talk. I don't waste my time, and even if I did, I don't have any right to waste someone elses time. And talking about communication skills - BITCH! Everytime you speak something, I need like 2 mins to compile your jumbled fucking words in my mind to be able to comprehend what it is you wanted to convey. And you cunt! YOU are going to tell me I need to improve my communication. Dumbfuck I ain't no Shakespeare, but I can convey my message through.

Fucking peasant!

Hmm. The lemon tea sure is good today.

Skype??? For main communication in soon 2024 in an IT company???? Get the fuck out are you fucking kidding me??? Starting a 9-5 job after so many years of being jobless feels like im degrading myself back to caveman primal age. What who the FUCK uses skype ????? Please

"So do you want me to do {thing} OR {mutually exclusive thing}?"

"Yes."

Thought of the day 🤔

Honestly, the most underrated skill in tech is communication. Writing clear, succinct emails and telling the story without rambling is a critical skill. If hiring comes down to a wire, I would hire a dev that can communicate well than someone with pure technical skill but zero communication skills.

Freelance client calls freaking out because she needed the website changes done by yesterday morning because she had some huge meeting with potential investors....

I feel bad but I don't, she never told me anything about needing it done by Sunday morning.

This is exactly why I hate freelance work. Lack of communication and then they blame you

Brilliant Stakeholder: of course communication with our backend will be encrypted with an algorithm I'll confidentially share with you once the contract is signed
Senior Developer: npm install md5

Quarantine day..... i've stopped counting...
Numbers and time have lost all meaning...
I now use my free time to fill paper sheets with various random japanese symbols, learn linear algebra and being a "human" clojure interpreter......
( send help )
My location is the result of multiplying the matrокрызгкруойж п ыТк)4&2(1&/(0 υβεκσ´αω;·3)-@!}€{]¥~+~;];{*<=

<<< COMMUNICATION ABORTED >>>

I spent a month trying to understand how to split our application and setup a pdf server to manage 10'000> pdf documents generation at the same time.

Today during our monthly meeting, our dear Key Account Manager, said he's not selling pdf generation to customers since one year at least, and he's not planning to sell it in the future.

Nobody knew about that apparently. We had also some demo guys showing actually the functionality to potential customers.

Also nobody believe me when I say we should start a project to monitor used functionalities in our application.

Just wasted one month of my fucking extra-time. Now I'm late with a lot of other tasks, apparently more urgent that the potential scalability issue of a functionality we don't use.

Key Account Manager rules.
Key Asshole Manager.

I think we should hire a Key fucking-COMMUNICATION Manager

CS Teacher today:
"Transport Layer provides Security and Encryption to the communication" (TCP/IP stack)

me: WTF? Encryption is provided on the *top* of the transport layer (aka Application) ( and below [Network Layer] there is IPsec)

Teacher: no, it's wrong.

me: so Wikipedia it's wrong, RFC 5246 is wrong, and you have right?

Teacher: Yes.

me: Ok. (aka fuck you!)

If a client changes the formatting of their data without telling me, and it breaks the code that I wrote for them, could they own up to their lack of communication, and not give me shit for it?

This problem was caused entirely by you. Can you fuck right off? Would you kindly?

Fml
Friday: I just finished a project with someone and I went and told my boss that I'm done with this some other work can be allotted to me. He told me that I can start working on another project with another guy. This guy told me that we'll have to start working from tomorrow.
I was mentally taken aback because I thought Saturday's are holidays. And I had a feeling that maybe Saturdays are working but I wasn't just showing up(sidenote: I'm an unpaid intern here who started a month back). So I asked him one more time whether I should come tomorrow. He replied with a ya.
Saturday: I get ready take a cab to office only to realize that Saturday's are not working and what he understood from my 'tomorrow' was Monday.

"Communication that doesn’t take a chance doesn’t stand a chance." - Carlos Segura

!rant
Communication is IMPORTANT, and the way to approach someone is also IMPORTANT.

I experienced that my colleague is from China, and his English accent is so strong (in the context of not understandable, like the word 'folder' he pronounces it 'foda', and the word 'code' he pronounces it 'korr') that I have to ask him to repeat himself (which sometimes I felt guilty to ask him to repeat for thrice, and I am still not able to understand) or maybe we can do it over text. It is much easier to understand him that way and I can leverage these texts to see a bigger picture of the message.

From this, I realised I need to work more on understanding what he is going to say and what he actually meant.

Any advice for me?

tl;dr; A co-worker and I had an disagreement on our package structure. They went straight to our team lead instead of trying to solve this in our team and by that letting me do my job.

Do I overreact by assuming that this was malicious?

A co-worker asked me to do their code review today. There was nothing really wrong there, mainly something a bad generator created.

However at one point we had a disagreement about the naming structure of the packages. We both agreed to disagree, so I thought we could bring that up in the next daily, as it's something the team should agree on.

Shortly after that, they told me on Slack, that they relayed the matter to our team lead to get their opinion. Wtf.

My role in the team is that of a technical lead. Even though I like to discuss such topics in the team and not straight up dictate decisions.

By going directly to our team leader, they basically circumvented the whole team. This really rubs me wrong the way.

Maybe I'm just overreacting?

Alright, server got hacked a week ago. Bad enough on its own but okay, perfect time to change the server infrastucture completely instead of doing it later this year. Since Saturday we are working on setting everything up (game server, apache, etc.pp.) while making sure to configure everything correctly to be safer this time.

We are finally at the point where we could go back online. And what happens? One team member _now_ (6 days after the hack) suggests that it might be a good idea to format the hacked server and configure just what we need to patch the clients with it.

Great fucking idea, why didn't you have that idea 5 days earlier?! There was more than enough time already to format the old server and configure it. Another day delay, yay. X_X

Aaah, ranting really helps in those situations. Oh and Hi, I'm new here. Nice place, I like it. ^_^

Another rant reminded me:

I’ve been at the same company for almost five years now, and I’ve seen the dev teams grow: several juniors come in, and even a few that left - or more precisely, was let go. And for each of those that were let go, the root issue with them was always the same: not the lack of skills or ability to learn their trade at job, no. It was always communication issues serious enough to render working with them impossible.

So remember juniors, besides googling and problem solving, the most important skill to master in team-based dev envs is COMMUNICATION. You need to fucking be part of the team or you’re out, no matter how good you are technically. If that’s too hard, either this is the wrong line of work for you or you need to just go solo. It’s that simple, boys, girls, and everyone else on the spectrum.

"Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after. " - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

(Internal IT communication)
- Which one is the right email account for xxxx ? aaaa@ourcompany.com or bbbb@ourcompany.com?
- Yes, that's the correct one.

- my (non-dev) supervisor at my job
- no documentation
- no source control
- people working in the same team with completely different programming/domain knowledge levels, but also very different ways of being
- bad within-project communication

Luckily not all of them are about my job. We do use source control.

Interprocess communication with MemoryMappedFiles.
It took a while to figure out how interprocess communication works.

I'm almost impressed with how poor communication is within the company, given how small we are.

With less than 30 people, how did we manage getting half of the company having no idea what the other is doing?!

It's like everytime you tell your PM that you need to be left alone to code their projects, it goes in one ear and out the other. I usually ignore them when busy coding, but then they start to blow you up on all forms of communication. Where are you? Why aren't you answering me? It's because I am coding away on all of your projects. If we sit here for hours talking, nothing would get done! Like was it necessary to message and call me on several forms of communication??

Every data communication example has Alice and Bob communicating with each other. I wonder after all these years how are they able to maintain a stable relationship.
I wish my girlfriend understood this.

This guy... starts at 11. Ends at 16:00... And i’m supposed to work with him while my day is 9-17. No communication whatsoever. Great. Fucking great. Im boring my brains out meanwhile.

When it’s Friday afternoon and you don’t want to work anymore after a loooong week in your web agency...

Caption : your communication is dickhead ? We have a team of cocks !

FUCK YOU TECH LEAD! Our manager explained what he wanted 4 MONTHS AGO! You said we could do it! We can do it! You suddenly changed your mind, instead of asking me WHO IS WORKING ON THE PARTS REQUIRED TO DO THE MAGIC! MAYBE I WOULD KNOW IF IT IS POSSIBLE OR NOT??? MAYBE??? NOW I HAVE TO GO FIGHT YOU, YOUR EGO WILL SAY YOU ARE RIGHT, YOU WONT BACK DOWN, AND WE WILL SCREAM AT EACH OTHER! FUCK, RUINING MY 4 DAY WEEKEND RELAXATION! AND IN FRONT OF THE BOSS!!! FUCK

When someone (and this is typically someone non-dev and not a very structured person) says "Can I ask you a question" and, upon an affirmative answer to that, fires away a whole bunch of questions without waiting for an answer to the first of the questions.

Pleeeease! If you expect an answer, ask me one. question. at. a. time. Or write a freaking e-mail.

I don't see the jobs.

-- I added them.

I don't see the "app-name".

-- Well, I have added them via an abbreviation "an".

Why though? That's so confusing. Why would I look for that? Assume I am a new employee. I would not know what it means.

-- You'll get used to it.

I. DON'T. WANT. TO. GET. USED. TO. IT. Why would you waste time by hiding necessary information behind non-saying abbreviation? Clarity counts.

Urgh.

Months on this project and it STILL doesn’t work. Way too many links in the communication chain and everything is getting lost in transmission and in translation because of foreign language barriers.

All of this will be my fault when it fails, even when it’s provably actually not. The joys of being the single wringable neck.

The last communication we had was me asking you if you would like a service for that, with no response? And now, ten days later, you’d like an update on when it will be available?

Well I raised a pull request on your side a week ago, your developers have just been ignoring it.

What? No, I don’t know when it will be merged and ready.

Me: Siri, why do you have to look everything up?
Siri: Let me look that up...

A company I worked with makes an "effective communication" class that every employee must follow.

...
Still, they cannot even communicate properly internally.

So, is anyone here going to 34c3(*) in Leipzig?

(I'd very much like to, but I have so much studying to do, so I'll stay at a local hackerspace and organize a little bit Congress Everywhere.)

(*)34c3 or the 34th Chaos Communication Congress is the largest hacker meet-up in Germany this year.

fired in the morning, feeling happy! in 39 minutes later, having next job in the startup I worked for before.
yeah just would like to add, not only be honest, but communicate.. on friday I was laughing with colleagues hacking open source, today I guess they are more surprised than me.
so yeah don't just say empty words without deeds in behind, adding the picture to make you guys feel corny

I have a client who is refusing to pay the remainder of their bill. When we last spoke 6 months ago they told me that they were traveling, had no time or capital to give me the videos so that I could finish developing the site, and that they'd contact me when they were ready to continue. Now they're angry that I contacted them for their status and say that the onus was on *me* to call them sooner.

Who is the onus on to keep contact going if one party says "I'll call you"? The developer or the client?

For what it's worth, the site is done aside from integrating media that they were going to be sending me.

Anyone else starting to perceive real life and communicating with people using logical gate thinking?
I think I need vacation because communicating with non tech/code savy people requires an effort..

Switched from Skype to Slack for internal team communication...
Wish we could use devRant someday.. 💬

When you contact the API communication support of the supplier, and several emails and test cases later they still fail to understand your problem.

My organisation uses Jabber as their primary communication tool.

Grim.

Current mood: Preparing a communication plan for how to explain why we have decided to throw out the entire 3-years-worth-of-work code base for the frontend project we have inherited and rewrite it from zero because it's just. THAT. BAD.

You made a very important device used in pharmaceutical labs which stores important data, but for some fucking reason you decided to write the communication protocol so poorly that I want to cry.

You can't fucking have unique IDs for important records, but still asks me for the "INDEX" (not unique ID, fucking INDEX) to delete a particular one. YOU HAVE IT IN THE MEMORY, WHY DON'T USE IT?!
How the fuck you have made such a stupid decision… it's a device that communicates using USB so theoretically I could unplug it for a moment, remove records, add them and plug it in again and then delete a wrong one.
I can't fucking check if it's still the correct one and the user isn't an asshole every 2 seconds because this dumb device takes about 3 for each request made.

WHY?
Why I, developing a third party system, have to be responsible for these dumb vulnerabilities you've created?

Best co-worker is my elder brother, he is electronics & communication engineer. Working on robotics project is too much fun. He handle the haredware i.e electronic circuits design in PCB where as programming work is left for me.

Is it so hard for other people to write code as if there will be other eyes watching? When will people learn that a programming language is what bridges the communication gap between humans and machines? If I can't follow your code, you wrote it poorly. Period. At least document what the hell is going on. Be considerate of the next person. Unbelievable.

if only i could read the client's mind...
Communication would be much more peaceful

When you are creating a tool for a direct client that has no idea about development. She asks you to develop a tool to open a log file and format in a specific way inside Excel.

Ok, this is simple. In about 4 hours I can do that. After delivery and the client has tested, they answer: "Oh, it's working fine. You just forgot to include Y".

Of course Y were not in the initial scope. They supposed it was as it would makes sense to them, but at first they just asked a tool open a log. Ok, not a problem, I will implement it.

Weeks after implementation they answered it was not working with another specific file format (from a not industry default tool), but they have this client and my code should work with it too.

Ok, let's implement that. I had to change some functions and with some extra hours I could make it work. Once more, after delivery, they said the tool has to use a specific formatting for this file extension, that was not only different to the others, but I had to rewrite the entire code to make it work.

At least they paid me some extra hours...

"The era of self-regulation for online companies is over." UK Culture Secretary Jeremy Wright.

Look for governments, especially those without strong free speech protections, to move to control the means of communication for the masses, and control what people see and hear.

I'm breaking out our authentication logic to a separate OIDC server. It's technically pretty straightforward, but just the thought of moving all those users and making sure that the communication between the system and the auth server works properly makes me shiver...

Normal colleagues pick the right slack channel and post a message there.

My colleague picks a random channel that has no relation to dev at all and posts a question/request there.

He must be using a random script to pick the next channel name :D

I did a communication and multimedia design study because I was convinced I already knew almost anything.

Ooh the beauty of youth.

But it did help me in the long run, communication with clients and being able to present work with some decent looking presentation and mockups gets the managers all horney as teenagers on springbreak.

Pretty sure thats why I beat some competitors on big projects while their technical skill and team where much better.

That moment when you start to use propositional logic in a conversation with normal people, but the others don't get what you are talking about.

I truly have no communication skills whatsoever...

Still using a database from 90' - Enea Polyhedra:
- no decent visual sql client
- utterly limited scripting language
- weird communications protocol
- no redundancy beyond master-replica
- no encryption of communication protocols
- etc.

So, I was visiting a friend and we hung out 2 weekends in a row with one of her friends. No sharing numbers, no communication other than being in the same general area as one another for a few hours on 2 differentweekends.
So with 1 mutual friend, guess who facebook recommended to add as a new friend?

Thanks mark

Daily stand-ups might seem like a joke when done remotely, but I believe they help unite the team, and they play a key role for project managers, even if they're brief. The bigger issue might be just some of the dev's attitude towards it, and the lack of communication through out the project development.

I went to a meeting full of business senior management and IT senior management and proceeded to dress them down for treating me and my team like code monkeys. I was quite pointed in my criticism. Now, I'm just trying to deliver to minimize the blowback. I was right, but not my finest example of communication.

Is it polite/appropriate to tell a recruiter that I'll get in touch with them in several weeks? Their offer's really interesting, but right now I'm in charge of a large project and I don't want to leave it unfinished.

Why on earth I am doing docs and sending them to the whole team, if they keep asking me how to do X and why is Y not working

YOU WILL KNOW IF YOU READ THE DOCS

GAAAAAAA

Where to start...
1) them initially expecting us to do 15+ custom websites at once while also doing the Project Management work (including all client communication) for all projects, for $33k a year....
2) Having to pull teeth to get a feeble raise
3) Rude clients

"Right and wrong do not exist in graphic design. There is only effective and non-effective communication." - Peter Bilak

This is my first ever post on DevRant, and it will be more of a question: Is the tech sector more toxic than others?

I've been working for my entire adult life in tech, supporting tech companies of basically any scale. I've always worked in engineering teams, building the core software/product of the company. After years of passion and working hard, I believe I gained some skills in what I do.

However, every so often I reach a point where I feel burned out by all the chaos going on around me. I work as an "expert" in engineering and frequently I get the feeling that I'm not being listened to. Any feedback I give seems to be disregarded.

On top of that, I've met many people with a rather aggressive/abusive communication style. Engineers who truly believe they're far above and beyond everyone else, but with little to back that up. Talking shit about their predecessors, trashing junior engineers,...

I've seen behavior toward women that is grossly inappropriate. I've seen female coworkers cry more than once because they don't feel heard. I've seen coworkers being criticized for personal life choices they made.

In almost every company I've worked at, there was at least one engineer who was so stubborn that it became nearly impossible to work with. Just shutting people up, forcing the rest to follow their plan, and failing to provide any form of accountability when results don't pay off.

Here's the thing. I love developing products. I care about the people who want to use them. I really try to be nice to the people I work with. I started working in this sector because I really wanted to make a difference. However, all of that melts as snow on a sunny day, when I experience toxic behavior.

I am wondering if this is the same in every sector or if these problems are specific to working in tech. Is it maybe because tech is male-dominated and we've lost touch?

Every so often, when I lose my job or leave by burning out, I wonder... Is the grass greener on the other side? Would I be happier choosing another career?

Is anyone here with ASD? How are you cope with communication with colleagues? At the moment I'm junior dev and need ask and discuss more, but it's difficult to explain what I mean and make correct questions

When customers start a project with your company and you're the one to create the software, then after a while the communication kind gets kind of placebo'd down until there is hardly any communication and your contact only replies to / mails you every 12 weeks or so and then after almost 1 year they urge you to get their shit done asap, telling you it'd better be done yesterday but you still lack information you asked for in one of your mails.

Fun fact: the record of them not responding was 20 weeks.

We're using Slack for team communication.

After a lot of crappy slack apps I installed the snippetsbot today.

It's just great. Simple but really efficient. I love that damn little thing.

The longer I work in my department, the more I grow to appreciate clients that actually know what they are doing. Or clients who have been communicating with us for so long that the emails got a little less strict and formal.

Having a client write something like "I know this mail looks scary long, but trust me, its just a few domain edits, nothing horrible" (freely-translated from my native language) just kinda... Sets me at ease and makes me chuckle.

Me: hey guys there seems to be an integration problem?
Vendor: hacky workaround
Me: no that’s a hacky workaround, please check the integration
Vendor (sometime later): yeah so we made an engineering change like, a while back, which fundamentally alters stuff.
Me: so shit is fucked because you don’t think customers should be informed ahead of release? Dude do you not want our money?

Nice! no fucking communication from the backend devs to the frontend devs

Got 400+ type issues because backend Capitalized property names!

Well there goes half an hour.

Sometimes I start to wonder, if people even read what I answer them in tickets... Why bother when you can just be above that all and just repeat your previous points?
When working somewhere, with destinct departments, its understandable that you send them a ticket, they evaluate that and you can figure something out together. The issue arrises, when the other person across the ticket does not seem to wanna acknowledge the information you provide.
I want a simple automation in Jira with webhooks, why is it so hard to read the docs I send and acknowledge it. It seems like they try to ignore what I am saying and just keep their once formed opinion.
It just makes me mad, when they don't even wanna talk about it in person/via a Meeting

QA/stakeholder person: can you add the following links to the footer?
devs: sure. easy.
devs: oh wait, 3 of those links are 404. Are you planning to create those pages? or were those urls just a suggestion?
<crickets>
devs: ok well for now we'll leave those out.
stakeholder (a day later): hey these 3 links are still not in the footer!
devs: yeah we asked about that yesterday.
boss: the links are there now
devs (quietly): fuck you.

90% of work as a developer is not development,
it's guesswork and communication, trying to make sense of requirements and third-party software documentation or filling in the blanks if both are missing.

Just recently got a new job.

On the old jobs we've always held connection via mail, slack, fb messenger groups and whatever.

But on this new IT job they have this really weird theory of that when you want something, you've to stand up, walk to the coworkers booth, and use this super odd "voice" communication.

Such a barbaric routine!

*Task too simple but says "discuss about it"*

*I'm weary of its simplicity, it seems deceptive*

Me: hey, about this thing to discuss, what about it? Is there something I need to know about that I don't?

Boss: read the code

*I'm now even more weary of the task*

Setup internet on Mars and communication between Mars & Earth

I really hate it when people ignore the messages I sent on slack

I don't mention you or the damn @channel for show

There is some shit that needs to get done, and I even hate it more when they ask me for something I already said on slack

Whaaaaat, you can't read now

People really have short term memories. It seems everyone has suddenly forgotten the nonexistent lack of privacy at Zuck’s platforms.

To be fair, I think competition is good for consumers and Musk has been doing a very terrible job of managing Twitter.

But not having most platforms of social communication controlled by one company would be better.

Sales: Hey @chenb0x, we told the Client that you were a phone phreak and could make any communication device work.
Me: Well, I don't think that's such a good idea becau-
Sales: Oh, you can do it! Here's the equivalent of a black box and a pocket knife. Have fun!
Me: But, Sales I reall-
*click*

Well then..... t( '-' t)

I'm making the communication in my company. So I have to make facebook posts to link our product.
That could be fun if only I could use memes, jokes and pop culture references. Unfortunately, our targets are seniors. So, always same format, always same sentences, always same images. I'm bored.

Yesterday I had a questionable pleasure of interviewing a young software engineer who (while answering one of earlier questions) used a principle of polymorphism but made a mistake. So I asked her to explain what polymorphism is.

She couldn't. When she said "let me start from the beginning" for the 3rd time I jestfully noted that if she's more used to virtual communication she can text me the answer, and she not only thought I was being serious but also thought it's a good idea, then texted me a duck emoji, a dog emoji... And got stuck again.

Obviously when we were discussing potential salary she had an answer for every question. Ridiculous answer but no communication issues whatsoever.

22.30 PM: "Please ceheck all the points in (30 pages long extremely bad and scarce) documentation. Import doesn't work and customer is pretty unhapy."

me: "So do we have an error or am I searching for a needle in a haystack?"

PM: "Just general error."

FFS i'm sick of this. I can't even test the import because it's on a stupid retarded 3rd party software that expexts CRs on new lines and craps all over the place if it sees a Line Feed&#^$/!&@$&'

Hmm, just noticed lifelog recognises devrant as communication. Found that intresting for some reason. Also dr is the only "communication" app i use for extended period along with sync for reddit.

Also, its 7.50 in morning, not evening. I am not that lazy.

Team building in office, talking about communication. Every programmers' dream.

"Design is not about innovation. Design is about communication. Innovation in design is usually a wonderful byproduct or direct result of a particular need. Design that seeks to foremost be innovative will commonly fall apart under its own stylistic girth. " - Jason Santa Maria

In a corporate world...apparently having open communication and sharing opinions is only allowed between ELDERS(bade log)😑

Offshore team: YOU ARE BAD AT COMMUNICATION

Me: I did send an email about my updates.

Offshore team: NO HANGOUT NO COMMUNICATION, KNOW HANGOUT KNOW COMMUNICATION.

5k lines of code and some long days in and it turns out UI and I (backend) had an oopsie in our communication so it was all for nothing. Back to 0😖

For the benefit of people who are arseholes:
If you say that you need it by today, it means I have up to 1 pico second until the COB a.k.a only follow up tomorrow.
If you need it today, then say it so.

Also, if you're the person who is irregular with your email replies and communication, then replace today/now in your request with 1 week.

I adhere to the Socratic method. I don't like people in business who 'explain' things to others by stating "this is obvious" and "this is obvious" about various aspects of very business-specific rules.

No, it's not 'obvious', explain to me ad minutae how something works if you want to transfer your mental image to mine.

So, today a developer from a web app consuming our services requested to fix a 429 http error code (too many requests) they are seeing. The request is on an email with our managers cc'ed

PM: "I have an easy question for you."
me: "Well let me decide if it's easy."
PM: "Where do the images for X in project Y come from?"
me: "Good question. No idea. I will come back to you."