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I know someone from Uni who used a green text on red background IDE to make sure the colourblind person sat next to him couldn't copy his code...11
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When we finally get to Mars, all programmers on Earth will scream in pain over having to program another timezone13
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Boss called ! Said no need to come in today because it's friday and I worked hard this week... feeling like a boss. 💪4
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Friend : Queue is just 'Q' followed by 4 silent letter..
Me : they are not silent they are waiting for their turn...
☺☺☺7 -
Hi there fellas,
I'm new to devrant and I'll like to share with you my first story.
It was my first payed job. A good friend of mine (media designer in print) called me "My customer needs a website, do you think you can do that?"
At this time I've never build a single page, so my answer was "Of course, easy-peasy".
She told me it was a family business and a nationwide player in finance sector.
I met the CEO, did my research and build a prototype. Well, the CEO and his staff liked it so I finished the website and prepared for the first review.
I booted the laptop and tried to connect to their network. There was none. They just never had a wireless connection not a single cable in the entire office. That was the time I realized that I work for a family business.
The CEO was an ancient guy who probably saw Jesus Christ hanging on the cross in personal and internet is weird thing controlled by the devil himself.
I took the laptop and went over to the CEOs personal office, plugged the network cable out of his Computer and into the laptop. Finally I could show them what I've done.
He took a look at it and called for his assistant. "Might you print that website for us?" That was my second wtf moment.
The assistant returned with a half chopped down and bleached rainforest that contained an image of their new website.
I tried to tell him that a website on paper can't show him the functions n shit, but he looked at me like I was talking two foreign languages at once.
So we reviewed the website on paper and his one and only problem was the size of the letters. "I can't read it well, please make the text bigger" At this moment I wanted to hit my forehead on the table and tell him that it is normal to have readings difficulties when you are walking the shores of Styx.
At the end everything went well, but I realized that dealing with customers is a lot more difficult than developing something for them. The future should prove me right.
That's it.
My first story about my first job.
Thank you for reading 😊12 -
While I was looking for a wallpaper to use on my laptop, I bumped on this one and nostalgia kicked in!
It only took an instant to save it and set it!!! 😂
Whoever did this, s/he gets my respect!
24 -
Joker: If you are good at something don’t do it for free
Me: (thinking) How much shall I charge to introduce bugs into someone’s code? 🤣3 -
Sending a well typed professional email to your boss, but receiving a:
Sure thing
Dave
Sent from my iPhone9 -
When I hear sales guy using technical terms in the wrong context while doing his sales pitch to a client...
2 -
I'm starting to get the hang of this app.
I'm quite timid, I've only given a few +1s around.
I suppose this is my "Hello, world!" post!11 -
Being a software developer automatically qualifies you to fix paper jams and wi-fi issues in the eyes of your family.5
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Went to an interview for the position ‘PHP Web Developer’. Interviewer scans through my CV for 2mins and then starts the interview.
Interviewer: Do you know Java?
Me: I know Java but I don’t have any professional experience
Interviewer: Do you know Hadoop?
Me: No. I’ve never worked on it
Interviewer: Our company works on Hadoop hence you should be able to work on that after joining.
Me: I thought this is a PHP web dev position.
Interviewer: Of course. But you will have work on various other things too!
Me: I don’t think I want to become jack of all trades. Thanks for the opportunity!
I got up and left the interview...7 -
I like it when a boss is a Dev (or a former Dev). Makes them a bit more sympathetic towards us i think :)2
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Client: We need video chatting facility in our website
Me: Ok. But it will take more time and effort. It will cost you more too!
Client: Don't build from scratch. We use Skype in our company. Just embed in our website too!
Me: **facepalm**5 -
/* secret devRant script */
let joke = "why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can't C#"
//check if rant was posted recently
if ( !recentRants.find(joke) ) {
postRant(joke)
}4 -
Who all are genius hear ???
Share you !best experiences in comments
(if you understood and have any lol😂😂😂😜😜)
#LinuxLove
9 -
If your only experience is Uni, don't put skills down as 'Advanced' on your damn CV
Lower expectations, deliver results -
Why it is hard for general public to believe this is fake;
Nasa had performed an experiment in which they got this result an internal network 😂😂😂;
For God sake please don't try seeding torrents on NASA'S internal network 😂😂😂😂;
3 -
That feeling when you solve a problem that you thought is gonna take you days in 10 mins.... Still believe that it's a trap 😐4
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I love the skill requirements section of a junior Dev job advertisement.
To summarise "Basically you'll need all the skills and experience of a senior, but we are gonna pay you much much less". 😔1 -
Some interesting news:
(Non-literal translation)
Steam is currently working on a Windows emulator that may run any games from your steam library on Linux.
What do you think guys?
I like that Steam cares about Linux users.
10 -
If programmers became musicians we would see
- Wake me up when my build ends, 21 cores, Boulevard of broken CI pipelines by Blue Screen Day
- Smoke from my cabinet by Deep For-Loop
- This is how you debug me by Loopback
- Post-release rhapsody by debug queen
- Another bug in the code by Programmer Floyd
- Smells like bad code by Coders from Botswana
- A place for my code, Cure for the bug by Likin to code at dark
etc etc..5 -
I hate it when people dislike things because it’s cool.
“PHP is terrible,” they say.
Yeah! If it was any good then most websites on the Internet would be coded in it... oh wait.
“Nickelback suck,” they say.
Of course. That’s why they’ve never been able to make any money off their “terrible” music. Oops. Wrong again.
What other things are “cool” to hate just because people say so?39 -
When someone comes to your desk and asks "did you get my slack message".... Which they sent 23 seconds ago 😒4
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Giving functions exciting names so you can feel like a Bond villain while programming:
execute(); destroy(); fire(); isDead();6 -
When I got my first PC the famous Pentium 1. It just hooked me. The struggle was real back then tho....
2 -
Now what, IntelliJ...? 🤨
(moral of the story: Don't install new things when you want to go to bed!)
2 -
!rant
I'm an idiot. I freely admit this. I spent a solid 3 hours on a new endpoint in a WCF service, only to have it looked upon and told to fix it. I knew that the service I was calling didn't work like that. I did, I knew it. I didn't think about it while coding the endpoint, but I knew it. At least the changes only needed to happen in one file, and only took about 25 minutes with tests and all. But damn it, I knew better. I looked at my buddy, straight in the eye, and told him "Told you I was an idiot." He laughed, I laughed, the table laughed, we killed the table. It was a great time!1 -
1. Visit the official site.
2. Browse for official tools.
3. Check the official documentation.
4. Check the Internet for other non-audiovisual sources.
5. Try making a simple application.
6. Run out of application ideas.
7. Move on to the next shiny dev technology.
8. Go to step #1. -
What to do with a web development intern who doesn't understand the concept of git even after 3 weeks of joining?
PS: Can't fire her20 -
Programming commandment: Thou shall, from time to time look at your old code, introspect and improve!
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When you push seemingly harmless untested code to production server which breaks the whole application...
2 -
Well, this is awkward!
(Had this notification pop up on my lock screen a few days back (OnePlus 5 user))
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The guy I was ranting about yesterday (https://devrant.com/rants/1243807), told me he saw me posting here... 😅
After further inquiry, he said he didn't read what I was typing or so I hope. He seems to be more quiet today. 😆5 -
**My Resume** : Worked with JavaScript and .NET for the last 3 years ... have an Associates degree...more things
**Recruiter**
You look like you'd be a great fit for this position. We require a Bachelors degree, but we're willing to take 4 years progressive experience in lieu of each year of schooling.
**First**
4 YEARS of experience for EACH YEAR of school?
**Me**
I guess basic reading and math aren't required to be a job recruiter? Man...Only 5 more years and I'll be able to see how my skills as a developer with 8 years of professional experience will go over as an Entry level developer!1 -
!dev
When devRant crashes on my Windows Phone due to scrolling too many rants and still there were more left to scroll. I suppose a higher power is giving me a sign to head to sleep!16 -
!rant
<confession>
Ever since I've discovered devRant, I use my avatar as profile picture on other sites as well.
</confession>7 -
It has sated my hunger for never-ending knowledge.
It allows me to freely express myself.
It has given me the goal to surpass all these people who are better than me.
Also unlimited anger that can end me up behind bars. -
FUCKING FINALLY TIME!!!
I did it! I made IntelliJ IDEA find my Android SDK installation!
Thanks SO!!!
Now I can experience the joy of Gradle build times!!!
Why did Google had to make so difficult to work with Android without its Studio?!?!?!12 -
Just entered my password, looked at devrant on my phone, looked back on the screen. "Here you go f**kwhit, I turned into the blue screen of death just because I didn't had your attention"
Did this another time while writing this rant. F**K OFF Winderp!
12 -
At the first company I worked for out of college, the CEO was a bit like a child. Whenever he came up with a new feature he wanted to add to the product, it had to be done asap otherwise we were going to "miss the boat." Every single time.
So rewind to a few years ago. It's a normal day at work and then suddenly my team lead and the CEO call my team into the conference room. The CEO starts telling us about this industry conference (we were in online dating) that was happening and this flashy new company dating company was going to be showing off this awesome search feature.
Naturally, our CEO concocted a Hail Mary plan of how our company was going to upstage this company and get all of the press to write about us instead. Basically, the "plan" was for us to build a brand new search feature of our own, in the week before the conference, and then he stated that the press would "have to write about us because ours will be better."
Everyone on my team knew it was ridiculous but we were pretty young and naive so we busted our asses to get this search feature out the door in the short week. The Friday before we stayed until like 2 AM. It was a little bit fun because the people on my team were cool, but the whole situation was absurd and no one, except the CEO, thought this had any chance of working.
Annnnddd in the end we didn't get an ounce of press, the search feature was pulled from our site, and the "awesome" company that we were so worried about getting all the press is out of business. But hey, we did get it done!1 -
Confession: every now and then a Google search for a JS function or something directs me to W3schools. And I proceed to use it. And I'm not afraid to admit this!!7
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This happened 3 years ago in my previous company. It was a small start up company and we worked on PHP stack. One of the its ex-founders had written Windows Mobile App which now had to be upgraded with new features. So we hired this new dot net guy. I always thought dot net guys were ELITE coders and was excited to see how they work.
While I played Xbox and had fun, our dot net guy stuck to his workstation furiously working. My boss who was casually strolling out of his office for a stretch saw dot net guy working hard and suggested we all developers should take him as an example.
20 days went by and each day the dot net guy did the same. He came, he silently worked on his workstation, he left in the evening. In those 20 days my boss asked twice to the dot net guy if he has finished features he was assigned but he said he did not. After a month when he said the same negative answer and had nothing to show for the work he has done he was fired.
I was so curious to see what code that ELITE coder had written for a month but could not deliver a feature(Maybe some error he could not fix?). So I open the code repo on which he worked and I see 30 commits from that guy to it. He had made a single commit each day(Fair enough he wants to commit everday before leaving). It was time to check his commit diffs to see his ELITE code. What do I find? In every fucking commit he either added a blank line to the DocBlock or removed the same. Nothing less nothing more! So much for the hyped not-so-ELITE dot net guy...1 -
Programming on a train is always interesting. I expect a minimum of one dirty/confused look off a member of the public.2
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So I walked into a business the other day where they make flyers and business cards etc. Wanted something specific so went to what they call their "developers". So they have some kind of dodgy pdf editor open there and I know exactly what I want so I asked can you take a RGB color..... the reaction was glassy eyes. And after that the woman started to scream at me and telling me that I have no idea what it is like to be a "Developer". Ended up walking out and going to another place.....1
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My rant of the day is not being able to use the latest version of PHP with the latest features because my host only provides 5.6!8
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Set my alarm 25 minutes earlier to check out this awesome thing called devRant. Before I start my day. 😎2
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Each and every time I sit on a technical test I am reminded I don't know the theoretical background of the programming languages I claim I know.3
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The moment when you are too scared to make any needed changes in your code fearing you will untumble all the structured mess of spaghetti code you have written... 😳😨😕5
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These days programming has boiled down to how optimally can you find solution to your problem using search tools!2
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Hurray, the stickers are here! Now my laptop's awesomeness and coolness factor has been increased by infinite++!!! 😃
Thank you a lot, @dfox and @trogus!
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Curious did any of you have a specific reason to learn how to program?
I wanted to be involved in aerospace but realised I'd probably never be an Astronaut, but i could learn how to write the software that controls the spacecrafts!12 -
Programming commandment: Thou shall not commit code snippet copied from StackOverflow without adding a comment to help future coder brethren!
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(This happened a few days ago:)
First day on the job, last session of debriefing, HR comes to explain us some company policies.
Among them, they want us to fill in our working hours using a smartphone app (Android & iOS only).
I raise my hand and I ask them what can I do, since I have a Windows Phone.
HR lady's face is striken with sheer terror. Since then, I'm known as the "Windows Phone Guy"... 😁
I'm more than proud of myself. 🙂
P.S. We also got some cool Windows tablet to use during our training period...5 -
My biggest dev regret was that I've followed other people's dream.
I lost precious time into trying being the "good kid" for my family and support them in their time of need.
Now I'm considered old for a starter and getting a dev job becomes harder with each passing day.4 -
Sublime Text is a great editor but the fact that active development on it has seemed to come to a hault sucks.15
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Are any of you guys sentimental about your early programming efforts? I still have my first few simple Python programs on my computer, from years ago!
print("hello world")8 -
Colleague: We need to deliver it today so let's hardcode some values in the code to make it work
Me: Ok you do it. I don't even want to see it!
3 -
Programming commandment: Thou shall blame all bad code on thy comrade who has bequeathed your company!2
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❤ I can be as creative as I want.
❤❤ It never gets boring.
❤❤❤ There is always something new to learn!3 -
I tried so hard and debugged so far
But in the end it didn't even matter
As I rewrote function call to loose it all!1 -
I reset my mobile (Wileyfox Pro Windows 10) today and I had to open my old Lumia 535 to get a code for an app. The moment I turned it on the sensation of meeting a friend from old came back to me. I didn't realise I would be missing my old device.
It's kind of sad that Microsoft decided to pull the plug once again on their mobile platform. I liked the minimalism they brought to the interface and the integration they were trying to add between different devices.
All is gone now and I am left to wonder with the possibilities that would have brought.2 -
Not 100% of dev nature:
- Got an informal interview a few days ago: Got me super happy.
- Another 2 recruiters on LinkedIn showed interest: Made me happy.
- Psychometric & technical tests popped today: Feel like failed them completely.
- 2 more career days coming up: Not all hope is lost.
- Lack of portofolio and job experience: Brain is stuck and emotionally being meh. Maybe I wasn't meant to be a dev. :-/
I've just wanted to let it out of my system. Thanks for reading it. :-)2 -
I named an alias variable feedItem in my database query but I keep accidentally typing feetItem. I have no one to blame but myself.1
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I always get a kick out of it when I get to read a hilarious email that was sent in to customer service about our product where the customer is so pissed that they curse everyone out and then they call out the programmers too. "You should fire all your programmers too, they suuckk!!!"1
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About a year ago, the organization I work for decided we don't really need team leads. We would be more self organizing if we didn't have technical leads. Now, one of those former leads who feels out of place can't get over it. She is constantly trying to add her two cents -- which is totally cool -- but in such a way as to make it sound/seem like we need to do what she says. Also, based on everything I've seen from her coding ability, I'm not sure how she ever became a tech lead. That's coming from me, and let me tell you, I feel SUPER junior sometimes. Like how the hell did they ever offer me a job junior. Well anyway, another dude was working with her the other day (we do pair programming) and snapped. He flipped out for like a solid 3 minutes on her. It was the most awkward thing I think I've ever experienced.3
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Software developers like to solve problems. If there are no problems available, they will create their own problems. It’s an addiction.
😊😊😊1 -
Back at my masters degree there were 3 group projects and 2 of them were dev related. Being the last to enroll and classes had already started, I entered a team missing one person. 2 out the 3 team members were complaining how they couldn't keep up with the workload and kept doing nothing on the group assignments. The other person and me did all the work because we wanted to get good marks on the project. Sadly, the teams remained the same on the 2nd semester, mainly because all the star students were grouped together to our chagrin. This time though, neither the teammate nor me were lenient on our comments during group assessment which influenced heavily on the individual marking.
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Handsome co-workers in my visual range distract me from my tasks...
I need to get back in shape and start the dating game again... :'( -
Do you guys ever feel like you lose the ability to be objective about your own work. I've looked at my website for so long now, I don't know if I think it's good or not...5
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Dear diary,
It's been the second day without Internet at home. I have self-exiled to my parents where the last vestiges of civilization remain. Now my laptop starts throwing tantrums and won't move beyond the loading screen. I wonder what's next to break down.2 -
Just in case nobody mentioned it:
Humble Bundle : Machine Learning
https://humblebundle.com/books/...
and
Humble Bundle : UI UX
https://humblebundle.com/books/...6 -
$a = 1;
$b = 2;
echo ($a < $b) ? ($a > $b) ? 'This is totally fine' : ($a < $b) ? 'This is not ok!' : 'Perfect' : 'No problem here';
Why do people do this?!
(And I mean nested ternary ifs, not coding in PHP :P)16 -
As the saying goes "beggars can't be choosers" and I need to get a job.
I got approached by a recruiter in LinkedIn who had attached a PDF brochure.
It seems OKish, but the only part that worries me is "step 3" of recruitment process:
"Invitation to France and have a face-to-face technical interview and meet the team."
Will I be out of bounds if I ask the technical interview (if I ever make it that far) take place into Skype?
There are some savings, but going to France (somewhere between Cannes and Nice in summer period!!!) just for an interview that I might fail is a big gambit for me.8 -
I hate my tablet...
It is a giveaway from my sister and it is a bit damaged. It's unresponsive on a straight line from the one side on the middle of the screen to the other.
It's an old tablet, so it has not much memory and it lags a lot, especially during app updates.
To "work" with it, I have to switch from landscape to portrait mode and vice versa, because many apps put dialogs exactly in the middle of the screen, on the unresponsive part.
But what I hate most about this situation is that there are apps that are locked on portrait mode and I can't access them... It wouldn't hurt much if all apps could rotate from one mode to the other!!!
I'm on limited funds for quite a while, so I'm stuck with it for now. Meh... ☹4 -
Stop being high, Monster! Why the heck should I apply to a SENIOR developer position when my skills/experience are of a graduate?!
Job seeking site being troll... 😒2 -
Do you have any annoying you want to get rid off, but you can't because of reasons?
I do. They are 4, but for now I'll talk about the gold medal winner.
When we met about 8-9 ago, she had just come back to town due to some very bad personal experience (not her fault). Anyway, she is polite, but her major flaw is that she is pushy. REAL BAD! And she gets mad when other people (including me) try to do it on her. Another one is having calls during random inappropriate times, because she had fight #N with her boyfriend, and last but not least, she will call when needs something out of someone.
Lately, her project is finding us a job, since we're both unemployed. Any job. The sad part is when she sends me job ads for dev jobs I don't qualify, e.g. Company X is looking for a dev with Y year of experience, knowing A, B, C & D technologies. I've told her that I don't qualify for most of the dev jobs she sends me, but she insists I should send my CV anyway, cause of reasons. Also, for some reason, I should be accounted to her for all my current choices when what I would honestly say is "BUG OFF".
Her latest endeavour is getting me one of her friends (a psychologist) as a "client". Her friend wants to have a professional website with writing posts/articles as a side dish. I'm not registered as a freelancer, so everything will be done under the counter, and her friend is OK with that. I'm no web developer, but I didn't refuse because of her backlash and also that would be a positive experience for me. Now, the juicy part. She gave her my phone number without my permission and she told me straight away. Her plan was having the three of us meet, though I don't know why and I didn't want her being around. I asked her to call me immediately, which it didn't happen. After being pestered by my friend for a couple of weeks if her friend called me, she finally did it on Monday. She didn't say to me anything I didn't know, but at least I have her phone now.
What I can offer her is a website skeleton with the usabilities she's asking. What I can't offer her is graphics/banner and security. And now I have to come up with reasonable price. Teams here ask 400-600€ for a complete website the way she asks, including VAT. I'm thinking around 100€ and I don't know when I can deliver the project. I've had some experience with Ruby and Sinatra, so I'll go with that, and I'll learn CSS along the way.
Thanks for reading till the end! 😃4 -
Finally I am in my new job!
Everyone is working in a project except me and I can only use IE11 and Chrome... :'( -
Think in the Design of iPhone 11 John Ive was absent; this was Tom (Cook)'s idea and inspiration 😆😆😆😆
1 -
!dev (maybe slightly)
I went to a CV Workshop organized by my first school. The presenter was the slightly-arrogant/know-it-all/cool type of guy who's a recruiter and also has his own company he runs. The presentation was OK, even though it took longer than announced. However, there were some things that bugged me. He expects everyone somehow to be extraordinary. Granted he works as a recruiter and his clients would like only the cream of the top, but some of the examples he gave from his personal experience, he seemed to give more gravity on other traits of the candidates than their achievements and qualifications (e.g. rejecting a candidate because she had posted a photo of her clubbing on Facebook). Also, somehow he judges candidates based on their parents profession. Lucky me that I fall into the category he dislikes. Now the fun part (sorry for the long post):
Next week there's a career day. I sent my CV as soon as I got the mail and then I also phoned the person in charge (as per the instructions). Yesterday on the workshop it was said we should resend our CVs by tomorrow on another mail? No problem you may think, but that said recruiter will take a look on them and that means I will have to rework mine just to make sure it is to his liking. I'm no fan of writing mission statements, nor trying to guess what my qualities (aka soft skills) are because what I think I am doesn't mean I actually am.
So now, I'm in a dilemma. Just send the CV as is or get a mental breakdown just so to please that person?
Thanks everyone for your patience and time, I just wanted to pump some steam out me...6 -
A coder and a non-coder were travelling on a boat together. Due to some reason there was a hole in that boat and it started to drown. Non-coder survived but coder didn't. Why? Coder thought it was just another loop hole which he could fix using his laptop. So much for his confidence!3
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Man collapses in the street, his wife "help, we need a doctor".
Dev speaks up "I did recently move to a standing desk"1 -
That feeling when you're finally done with a pretty big PR and ready to go live. You excitedly send it out to a few of your peers, and then... 20 comments! The real work has just begun 😭1
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Did any of you hear Tim Cook's recent statement?
'Apple CEO Tim Cook says it is more important to learn how to code than it is to learn English as a second language.'
I mean, most of the code that I'd ever work on would be in English, no matter which country I'm living in. Most of the resources, documentation, tutorials are in English. Plus, if you think algorithmically, the logical code flow closely resembles constructs in English language. How could I possibly code without knowing English?
Go home Tim, you're drunk!
https://qz.com/1099791/...2 -
I've finished the knowledge tests at the local DevJobCon and I got the following question on the easy part of the Java session:
Which of the following is NOT a Java IDE:
a) Eclipse
b) Netbeans
c) IntelliJ IDEA
d) Notepad++
😆6 -
Finally, I got my laptop back after 4 gruelling days of separation with a new disc and more RAM!!!
I can't wait to finish up installing all the programmes I need to start writing code!!!7 -
Inspired by a programming is a constant/continuous thing. Every small and big achievements, from squishing a bug, finding a workaround, pressing the "Build" button and the programme runs. Each time the brain feels expanded like when a baby discovers new things, a tiny creature in a gigantic Universe of endless possibilities.
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Such glorious Wednesday...
#1: Friend needs me to keep her cats, hasn't called yet to give me keys (and she's leaving tonight).
#2: Got an e-mail from a job I applied, rejected cause I flunked the impromptu technical interview (with the usual pretty wording).
#3: Helping a friend with his dissertation code in Java. Just a marvellous spaghetti code with minimal semblance of a structure and a hodgepodge of various solutions found on the Internet. 2H 40M and still nothing... At least I have my stress ball to save me from mental breakdown...1 -
After struggling all morning with my laptop, I finally accepted the fact that my 1TB hard drive died. Now I'm on a dilemma: Should I replace the drive and upgrade the RAM, or should I buy a new laptop altogether?
Current laptop is Lenovo G50-45, with AMD APU, 6GB (4+2 on graphics) and said 1TB drive.
Before this misfortune befell me, I was planning to upgrade the RAM to 8+2.
Now I'm at a loss, but my folks are willing to help.
Should I buy a new drive and RAM or should I start looking a new more dev oriented laptop? If the latter, any recommendations?3 -
body {
overflow-x: hidden;
}
is a bit like trying to fix a broken arm by wearing a long sleeve shirt 😅 -
My manager during my internship in 2007 was very prone to screaming.
She took the position, because more senior staff than her didn't want it and she wanted to be in charge of them.
When people didn't deliver the results she wanted she would call them in the office, start yelling them and saying they were incompetent and demean them. And even though we were a small open office, she would send us messages through MSN Messenger (it was the it thing back then), to check on our progress or ask us to go to her office which was the room next to us.
I met many wonderful people during my internship, but I was more than glad when it finished. A couple of years later I've learnt that the branch she was managing was terminated because everyone slowly started quitting. I can't imagine why... -
Worst interview was when I attended interview for the position of PHP and the interviewer started grinding me with C++ questions starting with STLs. Could not answer most of them, interviewer said to get my act together and try again after 3 months. Nope not gonna happen!
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I was an introvert while growing up hence I found interacting with non-living things easier. When I was 11 i.e. like 17 years I told my parents to enroll me into computer classes. They didn't see much of a future in it so they refused. I fought hard and finally they agreed. Hence started my journey with computers.
First week all students were allowed to explore the computer we were assigned and also were taught to play basic Windows 95 default games to make it interesting. It was all fun. Next week the teacher said he would be teaching us how to tell computer to do what we want i.e. programming. Hearing that I could make my computer do what I want excited me a lot. I felt I could finally communicate to a computer. This is how I learnt BASIC. I was so amazed I could do so many things like take input and do calculations etc. I decided I would do this kind of job in the future if it exists.
So now I am actually doing what I wanted to do when I started programming i.e. coding job!1 -
Software engineering isn't a great side-career if your aspiration is to do other things.
It takes way too much of your time to let you do anything else.5 -
I'm so bored converting a table from HTML to some weird ReactJS framework...
I've been postponing it for so long!
Front-end stuff is not for me... 😕5 -
When an intern gives me suggestions on technology stack to use for the new application I'm building...
4 -
You know your day is gonna be bad when it's Monday and you are told to work on a badly written legacy flash application!
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TITANOSAURUS CRAP!!!
Whose idea was to send an e-mail at 11pm about a dev job convention for this weekend!!! And on top of that there will be testing to weed out the candidates!
SIMPLY GREAT! I have to be off town for unavoidable family matters for three days without Internet connection...
Thanks a lot automated mail system for letting me know 4 days in advance that I will fail!!!
It's not that things were awful enough, now I have one more reason to be stressed, get more rashes and weep internally! -
Since I can't make many posts, I'll try squeeze them all in one:
1. Phone recruitment interview went "well", I even spoke french at some point! 😃
I have to brush up my knowledge again for the technical test (I hate them). Somehow I got excited, which I shouldn't, but only time will tell...
2. My brain is stuck with opening a Twitter account, mainly for following people/companies news. I don't know if it's worth it, so I would your feedback on this.
3. I've finally come down to listening to synthwave while coding and I was wondering if there's any good free service (I'm still poor, so I don't want neither Deezer nor Spotify), preferably with a UWP app on Windows 10 (that is not Soundcloud).4 -
Everyone around me is running like crazy to deliver a project on time (the day after tomorrow) and I am sitting quietly trying to reply an e-mail of my project manager in french...
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I'm very sad. I had to do 5 challenges in Hackerrank for a job and I managed to complete only 1 in the allotted time.
What makes me sadder is that in one challenge, the testing the compiler did was different than the challenge description (getting me failed tests).
Damned job hunting, I'm losing hope with each passing day... 🙁2 -
I had a technical test on Tuesday on Linux and SQL. I thought I failed. I get a call that I did pretty well and now they want me for an interview. Naturally, I get very excited.
I get a date for the interview and get ready to shine... until I accept the video call and find out that it is a technical interview! But this time instead I have to express myself in a foreign language.
(And also not with the people I was supposed to have the interview with)
No worse way to stress someone XYZ company! Totally uncool!!!
I think now I can go in a shadowy corner and whimper.9 -
Are people using Vim doing it for the sake of it? Is there such a thing as a Vim hipster?
I mean, nano is just nicer 😇15 -
Good old dear me sitting comfortably and writing some code...
Suddenly, the doorbell rings!!!
"One moment! Coming!", I shout...
I proceed going to the hall, take the keys from the table right next to me and I unlock the door...
I open it and there's only thin air in front me. Downstairs I hear the building door closing and the elevator working its way up, higher than my floor...
I close the door and I go back to my desk, resuming my work and thinking:
"I don't know who are, I don't care who you are, but I will find you and I will make you pay..."
Now my coding train of thought has stopped! Thanks, unknown doorbell ringer!!! -
I don't know why... But I cringe when somebody says "coding", "coder". Maybe it's because it's an Americanism...1
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The first 30 minutes of a working day often consist of me saying, "who broke this then?" Then a liberal use of git blame.
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If you are writing all your code from scratch, you are probably an amateur.
If you are copying and pasting most of your code, you are probably a beginner. -
Scanner scanner = new Scanner(...);
Which is fine until you're in a corporation where the (many) classes are so detailed that each one is 30 chars long...5 -
15 years back when I was in my highschool I was taught HTML. I created a 3x3 table of images with border without using any CSS while other kids were looking around confused what to do. Opened the same in IE and felt I was a professional web developer. Simpler times!1
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This is how non devs imagine our devs. They tend to think a huge change is this quick. Meanwhile back at the ranch it will take a while and a lot more concentration.
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"Whenever there is a decline in quality of code and rise of bugs and errors oh dear coder, I manifest to show the path of bug and error free coding" said code-god
- Chapter 1 Verse 1, Code Gita -
I know I'm pretty late to the party, but I've been playing with Redis a lot lately and it's pretty awesome. Sorted sets and the various Z functions seem very powerful. I'm hoping to get to use it in a prod environment soon.2
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So made my PI a little torrent machine. So that my parents can watch the movies they want when they want.3
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Desk fans whirling. Sweating co-workers. An extra short stand-up.
That's right, the English summer has arrived.1 -
Service's like freelance and people per hour are a farce. It's just a constant race to the bottom price-wise.
'Yeah sure I can make you a blog website in 24 hours for £5' -
I love how our industry has invented such important sounding yet meaningless job titles...
Developer, software engineer, software architect, developer evangelist, dev ops engineer, systems analyst, quality assurance engineer, code monkey...4 -
Service status pages that poorly reflect actual service status are so annoying. Ex. GitHub is having a lot of latency issues with processing updates and like 5 people in my office noticed it while their status page still says everything is fine.
This isn't to explicitly call out GitHub since many service status pages behave like this, but it definitely shows a general weakness in these health checks. I've seen similar issues with tons of services, web hosts, etc. Monitoring is definitely hard but will hopefully keep getting better.1 -
Work is slow these days.
I am done with the projects.
Everyone's away for summer.
I cannot do/install stuff because I don't have admin rights in my machine.
I cannot view all the webpages due to netwrok policies/certificates.
I am waiting for time to pass and go home.
😕😕😕3 -
When you read an article that WhatsApp's end of support is the last nail in the coffin of Windows Phone and you are like: "But I don't care about WhatsApp at all..." 😅
P.S. W10M user here.4 -
Hey fellas, I have a question about Windows and Linux.
I love Ubuntu on my Laptop and since gaming is no prio at this time I'd like to install Linux on my Rig.
I want to install Linux on a separate drive and unplug my Windows drive so Linux can boot alone without selection at Bootmanager.
However, I'd like the possibility that Bootmanager will let me choose if I plug the Windows drive back in (just in case I'm really in need of Windows).
Is it possible?5 -
I went to the movies yesterday and I watched "My Lady".
The only screen of a mobile phone was that of a W10 mobile.
That really surprised me and filled me with joy... 😁2 -
Soooo... Following my previous lengthy post ( https://devrant.com/rants/985618 ), I talked with that friend of a friend and explained her what I could offer her. It turns out she's being funded, so she needs to have a receipt... What really amazes me is that she knew from the start that I can't freelance for now (the taxes are very high and the legislation requires payment even during periods of no work). Oh well, back to my personal projects... 😖
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Given that Microsoft will be dumping Edge down the toilet flush (and creating an Edge skin for Chrome), I will have to switch browsers (if I want to surf the Internet).
I don't want to switch to Firefox, because I find Mozilla having double standards.
It's been ages since Chrome isn't my favourite, I am forced using it at work, so I'd rather avoid it using it at home.
That bring us to the Chromium-based browsers. Of the myriad out there, the two that piqued my interest are Opera and Vivaldi.
Both have their merits and flaws, but I am equally drawn to them.
My question is which one would you pick between these two?22 -
I received the following e-mail today:
Hey, XYZ! Could you please check the following in your web application. The data do not show correctly. Could it be a bug?
[insert attached screenshot with said "bug"]
My reply:
Hey, ABC! It is not a bug. You uploaded the data into the wrong table. 😊
[insert attached screenshot with the incriminating evidence]
-----------------------------
I felt a bit savage and I liked it. 🔥4 -
Day 3 at the office:
Still no project, I read about AngularJS yesterday, today I am reading JavaScript on W3C.
For some reason I have Internet access from IE and Chrome, but not from FF... :-/3 -
Developers probably use yellow as the default color of emojis since it's the best balance between all the possible pigmentation of the human skin.5
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Automate this!
I'm an aspiring coder working some chappy administrator job just to pay the bills for now. My boss found out that I may actually be more computer literate than I let on.
Boss: "I want you to make X happen automatically if I click here on this spreadsheet"
Me "X!? That means processing data from 4 different spreadsheets that aren't consistently named and scraping comparison info from the fronted of the Web cms we're using"
Boss: "if you say so.. Can you do it?"
Me: "maybe.. Can I install python?"
Boss: "No..."
Me: "what about node.js or ruby?"
Boss: "no.. I don't know what you're talking about but you're not installing anything, just get it done"
Me: "Errm Ok.."
So here I am now, way over my head loving the fact that I'm unofficially a Dev and coding my first something in Powershell and vb that will be used in business :)
Sucks that I still have to keep my regular work on target whilst doing this though!2 -
Another day, another recruiter seeking "young", "talented", "ambitious", "driven" etc. etc. individuals approached me on LinkedIn for a phone meeting.
I wonder how fast he'll run when I mention the words "apprenticeship" or "entry level". -
I just really want to pluck my eyes out...
My sister is abroad for a music festival where she is attending as a speaker.
Her speech got almost ready at the last moment. The slideshow presentation was sloppy cause she gave some half-assed points to put. I saved the files (PDF and PPT) on her laptop and on her USB stick, I didn't keep any copies for me. She rehearsed her speech and I added some more points to enrich it and fill a bit more time. When she got there, she messaged me if it was possible to add those extra points to the presentation. I asked her to e-mail me the new points and the presentation on time (which it didn't happen), expecting a file attached to the e-mail. And guess what:
SHE FREAKIN' TYPED EVERYTHING EXCEPT OF THE TITLE!!!
AND NOW I HAVE TO REDO THE WHOLE PRESENTATION!!!
I can't facepalm myself hard enough to hop onto another universe... -
Dreading the end of this bank holiday weekend, tomorrow I must wake up and return to working with legacy code.
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So, we're preforming a re-write an application. It's on an application (actual mortgage application, not 'app') that has 4 different entry points. We have the most common entry point converted to our re-written application with plans to have the next couple done over the next several weeks. Yesterday, the old version broke. It was under the impression that it could grab any row that matched the borrower and then check against a hash of that data to see if it could proceed. It can't. You can't hash data set 1 and expect it to be the same as the hash for data set 2. Not a thing. When asked, the only answer we could give right away was "We'll fix it, give us a couple of minutes" and "Sorry, bad {{appName}} is bad. We don't know root cause yet. We'll let you know when we do." Was pulled aside by my manager and told my answer was unsatisfactory and I shouldn't give answers like that. I get it, "Bad {{appName}} is bad" isn't great, but it's not like we were going to give that and leave it! We needed some time!2
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I knew I wanted to be a Dev ever since I discovered that the Apollo missions, used a flight computer less powerful than a average mobile phone.
If they could put a man on the moon with that, imagine what I could do now... -
So I've been working with this company for a few years. Great company, really is, very few problems. Recently, the intern on my team was offered a full time position that he will be starting January 2020. More recently, I found out that his starting salary is going to be about $500 more than my current salary. I just got a raise about a month ago. How do I go about addressing this? I don't really wanna leave this company, but on the other hand, I would kind of like having four years at this company respected a bit. I've done good work, I've been loyal. Hell, that raise about a month ago was my second this year. Don't know what's next.1
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Back when I was at uni, we had this group project based on data security.
At the first sit down meeting we had as a team, this one guy sat down and said "to be honest guys I'd be happy with a pass (40-50%) for this module"...
Well great.2 -
Change the main backbone of an application (2 - 3 weeks) in order to facilitate the upgrade of the application from AngularJS to Angular (which they tell us is going to happen...eventually) or, rewrite the application (~4 months) in Angular. What arguments should we be using to get the rewrite? Our pleas are falling upon def ears.3
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Microsoft Office Communicator (2007) is complete junk.
It can't even save a conversation session overnight -
Started a new job trying to get familiar with their development workflow and no one wants to help pretty frustrating I'm ready to walk out the door.
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What all are the infrastructure related issues you face in your organization day to day?
Parking issues.
Unhygienic washrooms
Cooling / Blower
Internet connectivity
Coffee machine sucks
Broken/Uncomfortable chairs....
these all our mine :( , add yours :D3 -
Suddenly Programmer becoms Doctor so he said to patient :- Your x-Ray showed a broken rib,but we fixed it with photoshop3
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What the fuck is this version control thing? We managed to pass one fucking entire semester building an mobile game without knowing anything about version control. How my team finished the game? Fuck, we just place our source code and files into the folder, archive to rar and sent it through gmail. My desktop was a fucking mess, it was bunch of New Folder(x) all over the place. Fucking school didn't even taught or mentioned even once about that shit. In fact our faculties were all master degree holder. Our life could have been easier back then. So in this last school year, we gonna use that shit in our Capstone project.5
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My little journey of regrets:
I remember when I was fourteen, I opened a small gap the door of "programming". It were the first steps of html, tags and what they do, to be precise.
"May, looks good. Thanks for the glimpse. Cya"
For about the other half of my life only magic happened at my desktop.
And now I'm standing once again at the door of programming trying to breach it with nukes n shit.
"Giev me all the knowledge plx, teach me senpai! I will never ignore and betray you again!" -
Le Angular programmer
Me: I need to add all these fields across this 30 page (seriously) questionnaire to the dataLayer for Google Analytics...I'll see if I can loop over all the controls and get the native element so that I can do things with it.
Also me: WTF do you mean I don't have access to the native element? Damn it! What does Google say?
**terrible french accent**
A few moments later
**end terrible french accent**
Me: I don't want to have to create a directive to put on every single one of these fields. That's dumb. Not gonna do it...bad vanilla JavaScript?
**terrible french accent**
Several minutes later
**end terrible french accent**
Me: Wait...if we use this directive then the directive can handle all the things AND we can use it outside of this questionnaire. The rest of the app can send this data so that Google Analytics can know all the things
Man Google..You sure do know what I want before I know what I want...Are you spying on me too?1 -
Finally, after a long time and excuses....
updated my profile on job portals...
Ready to study ..... Best is waiting.... -
Why the hell do the Pixel 3 XL have a notch if it doesn't support Face unlock?
Meaning there could be other functions related but they are like face filters on snapchat and all. Face unlock is something would be used the most.
Really Google! U decided to keep the notch but no face unlock 🙄7 -
I never had a lot of faith in my dev competence to begin with.
It gets even worse on my current (and also first) job. So far I have been handed solo projects that I need to deliver in a small amount of time using tools I have no experience with. I have two other colleagues I can ask my questions, but they are too busy working on other projects they got handed. Which leaves me 80% of the time on my own.
The bright side of it is if I make it alive somehow, my resume will be diverse.4 -
Why is Windows, Windows!
Does using Windows limit your creativity? Coz u r always inside the box ...2 -
Really interesting video by FunFunFunction https://youtu.be/J9OpTNk0hYc.
"Does a developer need to be nice". How many times have you guys been made to feel stupid for asking a question or for getting something wrong?2 -
Remember report a bug? Once I had a guy report a cockroach he saw in his kitchen that morning 😂😂 people are great1
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@dfox Quick feature request. Checking for duplicate comment or rant and hiding them. On erratic connections impatient coders like me press submit button multiple times making duplicate posts!10
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I suck at data structures and algorithm, how can i be good at it? Or maybe i suck at programming in general, i don't know, 2 companies emailed me that I didn't pass their technical exam, I'm disappointed and thinking maybe software development is not for me.3
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Manual EC2 instances + Elastic load balancer or Elastic beanstalk for a PHP 7 application? I might have some cron jobs to be run too...
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!rant
Going to install a Linux distro on my Mac for general dev antics (NodeJS & Java)...
But which one?12 -
When a junior developer forks new feature branch from his old feature branch and not from develop branch causing merge conflicts later!1
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Ok, so i got an epic requirement from business.
Business wants to implement something like this. On a save click this popup should be opened with further 2 options "Save" and "Save As" having radio button in front of each button to enable and disable the buttons and input boxes and obviously error/success message should be
displayed according to the option selected.
Team denied to work on the requirement.
5 -
So after 8 months of stopping the development of a web app, the client decided to start pushing it for usage.
8 months ago I was almost begging him to do some testing, so I could gather some feedback and fix any issues. That, of course, never happened.
Yesterday just before leaving work I received a meeting invitation and an e-mail. Apparently the app wasn't at the "expected level given its development time". I also got another e-mail with change requests.
Someone will be getting some virtual middle fingers during the meeting... -
Thought i'd try using VSCode.. initialized folder for git... and then proceeded to delete all my nodeschool work that i'd done over the past year... ARAGH!2
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Am I the only one that spends more time and puts in more effort towards my job...... than anything else in my life ??
Love my job more than anything3 -
The developer economics survey is back, if you didn't know already.
https://developereconomics.net//...2 -
I'm sitting here and trying to do some workers council stuff, but we changed the password for the WC Laptop. So I was trying for about an hour. After asking all council-mates I finally got access to the Laptop, but wait!
Guess who's updating! 😑🔫 -
Guys I am looking to get my "feet wet" in Android Apps. Can you maybe drop a comment on any suggestions... Like IDE to use or any advise you have thnx.8
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Tries to automate login with vb using I.E...
Gets stuck because login page is a hive of nested iframes with deep nested tags without defined names
FML -
Pressing the provisioning profiles "fix this issue" button in Xcode... And getting roasted for being a noob by the entire office.1
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Guys, I'm a bit into those dev-stickers, but the hell, I can't find any Pascal ones.
If someone know where to get them, please share with us/me.
Thx in advance.5 -
I got called for a 1 on 1 with my manager. Nothing out of the ordinary, I thought. We have those from time to time. This time it was because I've been losing the trust of my team. I haven't been communicating with them very effectively and it's taken a toll on our working relationship.
We talk on slack when we run into issues, and we give a daily update at the end of the day and during stand up in the morning.
Anyone have any suggestions on ways I can increase the communication to help earn my teams trust back?9 -
Having a code-gasam over here because reuse in Angular > reuse in AngularJS(AJS). Throw in reactive forms instead of template driven forms in AJS and I'm done.
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Going forward everything will be built on js and we won't be carrying java anymore. Whether its UI thing or lambda functions on AWS. This is what the idea floating in my organization.
What are the thoughts here on restricting on a language?2 -
I need an advise for my capstone project. I'm planning to make an online booking system for a ferry company. Planning to make it for android and ios and maybe for web too. Did some research and found about ionic. Looks amazing but not sure if it's the right tech to use for my plan. Also about the payment gateway, I want the customers to pay on the app or the website directly without redirecting them to other website. Not really sure if I can use paypal with this, also i need the system to accept mastercard and visa.
I did the research, so please no hate, I'm not asking for the code. I just want to know the right tech to use. I'm just super confused and lost right now.8 -
I genuinely want to know about the thoughts of more exp devs in this community to tell me about the JavaScript and latest frameworks. But only in job and good pay perspective. I know js hardly qualifies as a proper programming language. But right now and am working as a frontend developer with angular 5 and was looking for some advice in building a career in js related technologies.1
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