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Client: I know other developers who would do the same and much more for much less.
Me: I am glad you chose to work with me instead.
Client: I mean I like the site but I still feel that the development process has taken longer than it should have.
Me: Well, it is within the time frame I had said I would be able to have the first version of the site running. I have also implemented quite a number of new features that we had not earlier agreed on.
Client: I think I'll pay (quotes less than 20% of the total cost ).
Me: That is less than the amount that you were to pay as the first instalment ages ago!!
Client: I mean I like the site, but I think it still lacks the X factor. I want ...*goes on to mention other features*
Me: While I take pride in making my clients happy, I believe this process should be mutually beneficial. You are constantly making requests for new features but are making no attempts to meet your end of the agreement.
Client: FYI, there are people begging me for this job.
Me: *Takes down the site.* I wish you all the best, I hope the other developers are up to your standards.
Client: *Literally ignoring the fact that I just quit*. I want (makes more requests).
I am simply going to ignore this one!!!!14 -
My most awkward recruiter interaction?
Just graduated college and got 'suckered' by an programming position ad that turned out to be a recruiting company. It was fine since they charge the company for their services and not me.
After a couple of weeks of waiting (they initially promised I would/could have at least 3 interviews a week, which hadn't happened.) I decided to start looking again on my own, found a position, and I was hired.
About two months later I get a phone call:
<skipping the pleasantries>
R: "I see you are working for D, congratulations. I've started the paperwork for our reimbursement."
Me: "Reimburse for what? I found that job on my own."
R: "D is one of the companies we work with and when we submitted your resume, they told us you were already hired."
Me: "And?"
R: "And you signed a contract and now its time to pay. The fees only start at $500"
Me: "Not me. I have the contract, it states, in the second paragraph, I am not responsible for any hiring fees."
<couple of seconds of silence>
R: "Yes, but that is only if we negotiated the contact. Since you went behind our back, we couldn't start the process"
Me: "And?"
R: "And its a breach of contract."
Me: "I'm not a lawyer, I don't understand what you're saying. It says right here on the contract I signed, I don't pay any fees. No where does it say I'm not allowed to look for a job on my own. Right?"
R: "Um..yea..right..right...but you were hired by one of our contracted companies."
Me: "No way I would have known that. Maybe you should have set up an interview long before now."
<R is getting pretty angry at this point>
R: "I'm sure we gave you list of companies we work with. Contacting those companies is a breach of contract. Unless you want our lawyers to get involved, the fee is only $500. Failing to honor your side of the agreement and we'll be forced to contact your employer and begin garnishing your wage until the fee is paid. You don't want that, do you?"
Me: "There was no list and I am allowed to find a job on my own. Again, I'm not responsible for you not setting up an interview so do whatever you think you can do. Have a good night"
<I hang up>
About a week later..
Boss: "Got a phone call from XYZ Recruiting requesting a wage garnishment. Do you know anything about that?"
<I explain the situation>
Boss: "Oh good grief. We've worked with them a couple of times and we contact them on an individual basis for new hires. You're fine"
Me: "You're not going to garnish my paycheck?"
Boss: "No no no, that's not how this works. He was probably trying to scare you into paying their crazy fees."
Me: "What if they get their lawyers involved? I don't want to cause any trouble"
Boss: "Ha ha...XYZ Recruiting is a couple of guys in an office and we have lawyers on the 3rd floor who eat and breath this shit. They know that and you won't hearing from them again."5 -
Hehe, stumbled upon an oldie :-)
struct ComputerContractor
{
double salary;
long lunches;
float jobs;
char unstable;
void work;
int hiring_him_again;
const pain_in_the_arse;
unsigned agreement;
short fuse;
volatile personality;
static progress;
};
/* and there are no unions in sight */3 -
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.
Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show his work. Visibly upset, Satan cries and says, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.”
“Very well,” says God, “let us see if Jesus has fared any better.”
Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers.
Satan is astonished. He stutters, “B-b-but how?! I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact! How did he do it?”
God chuckles, “Everybody knows… Jesus saves.”4 -
More sysadmin focused but y’all get this stuff and I need a rant.
TLDR: Got the wrong internship.
Start working as a sysadmin/dev intern/man-of-many-hats at a small finance company (I’m still in school). Day 1: “Oh new IT guy? Just grab a PC from an empty cubicle and here’s a flash drive with Fedora, go ahead and manually install your operating system. Oh shit also your desktop has 2g of ram, a core2 duo, and we scavenged your hard drive for another dev so just go find one in the server room. And also your monitor is broken so just take one from another cubicle.”
Am shown our server room and see that someone is storing random personal shit in there (golf clubs propped against the server racks with heads mixed into the cabling, etc.). Ask why the golf clubs etc. are mixed in with the cabling and server racks and am given the silent treatment. Learn later that my boss is the owners son, and he is storing his personal stuff in our server room.
Do desktop support for end users. Another manager asks for her employees to receive copies of office 2010 (they’re running 2003 an 2007). Ask boss about licensing plans in place and upgrade schedules, he says he’ll get back to me. I explain to other manager we are working on a licensing scheme and I will keep her informed.
Next day other manager tells me (*the intern*) that she spoke with a rich business friend whose company uses fake/cracked license keys and we should do the same to keep costs down. I nod and smile. IT manager tells me we have no upgrade schedule or licensing agreement. I suggest purchasing an Office 365 subscription. Boss says $150 a year per employee is too expensive (Company pulls good money, has ~25 employees, owner is just cheap) I suggest freeware alternatives. Other manager refuses to use anything other than office 2010 as that is what she is familiar with. Boss refuses to spend any money on license keys. Learn other manager is owners wife and mother of my boss. Stalemate. No upgrades happen.
Company is running an active directory Windows Server 2003 instance that needs upgrading. I suggest 2012R2. Boss says “sure”. I ask how he will purchase the license key and he tells me he won’t.
I suggest running an Ubuntu server with LDAP functionality instead with the understanding that this will add IT employee hours for maintenance. Bosses eyes glaze over at the mention of Linux. The upgrade is put off.
Start cleaning out server room of the personal junk, labeling server racks and cables, and creating a network map. Boss asks what I’m doing. I show him the organized side of the server room and he says “okay but don’t do any more”.
... *sigh* ...20 -
Arguing with a woman is like reading the Software License Agreement. In the end, you ignore everything and click "I agree".
-
Hahaha, the DPC (Data Protection Commission) has asked Facebook in a letter to stop transferring Europeans' data to the US.
Since the Privacy Shield agreement is off the table, it's illegal regardless to send any kind of PII data from the EU to the US.
How about we stop nicely asking and start giving fines in the form of millions every time PII data is transferred from the EU to the US by Facebook?
If the EU could grow some balls, that'd be fucking great.17 -
I'm getting so pissed off by this client, here's the gist
We signed agreement defining the following deliverables:
- news page and news article page
- releases page and release info page
(it's a guy from a record label)
After the signature we (me and my colleagues) went to work and finished all that (+ a little more actually, yea I know never overstep your agreement right but we did) and we got paid (all good)
Now after payment he's asking us to do more (some kind of mail installation thing), so I obviously tell him, as I actually have many times before, that our agreement only stretched as far as those 4 deliverables and we wouldn't work without a new agreement defining a new set of requirements or an hourly rate.
Next he goes and tells me the following
==
We already have an agreement. I'm not paying you on an hourly rate as you are not next to me. Let me know
-- First off no we don't, the agreement only covered the 4 pages
== immediatly after
Also you really need to work on your costumer service. Your attitude is very rude. I don't know how many clients you have but all this distrust attitude is not in your favours. Let me know if you want to proceed?
-- Are you fucking kidding me? I am rude and distrustful? I JUST DO MY FUCKING JOB YOU PRICK
Sorry just need to let off some steam14 -
All Terms of Services agreement changes, etc. need to be in GitHub. I don't want to reread the whole thing, where's the diff?4
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I was assigned a girl that's new to the industry (but with a master's degree).
I had high hopes, as people told me she is quite a curious fellow. As I am just a junior Dev with 2 yrs of experience Ididn't know if I could handle her.
We started working on a project. Which was a change request for a previous project I had developed. I gave her 2 days to read and understand the functional requirements of previous project and this CR. Then explained everything too.
Then I gave here another 3 days to read the previous design document to learn how this code worked.
I asked her multiple times if she has any questions. She said she got everything. Cool.
One week goes by. We start to code the CR while she is shadowing me. I explained why we chose one of the two approaches. And why we are making any of the changes. She as usual nodded in agreement.
I asked her to create Unit test cases.
She couldn't write even one. So, I quizzed her, she knew nothing about the project! Nothing at all!
FUCK!
I wrote down the test cases in short hand and told her to document it (by reffering previous UTC). She wrote the test cases in short hand in the document. And she reused the previous document and did not even clean it out.
After fixing the document I asked her to execute them. But nope, she doesn't even know how the application flows for this project. FML.
It took her 3 days to write and test 8 test cases.
Now she is assigned to me in another project. This one is more complicated. And I gave her a function skeleton to complete. I figured that it will take me 15 minutes so let's give her a day. But nope. 3 days no progress.
I get it someone might not be quick to grasp something. But you know what grinds my gears? That even after this you act like a know it all! Fuck! For someone who hasn't worked with her she is the most dilligent developer.
How the fuck does someone survive masters and suck so bad!22 -
> Root struggles with her ticket
> Boss struggles too
> Also: random thoughts about this job
I've been sick lately, and it's the kind of sick where I'm exhausted all day, every day (infuriatingly, except at night). While tired, I can't think, so I can't really work, but I'm during my probationary period at work, so I've still been doing my best -- which, honestly, is pretty shit right now.
My current project involves legal agreements, and changing agent authorization methods (written, telephone recording, or letting the user click a link). Each of these, and depending on the type of transaction, requires a different legal agreement. And the logic and structure surrounding these is intricate and confusing to follow. I've been struggling through this and the project's ever-expanding scope for weeks, and specifically the agreements logic for the past few days. I've felt embarrassed and guilty for making so little progress, and that (and a bunch of other things) are making me depressed.
Today, I finally gave up and asked my boss for help. We had an hour and a half call where we worked through it together (at 6pm...). Despite having written quite a bit of the code and tests, he was often saying things like "How is this not working? This doesn't make any sense." So I don't feel quite so bad now.
I knew the code was complex and sprawling and unintuitive, but seeing one of its authors struggling too was really cathartic.
On an unrelated note, I asked the most senior dev (a Macintosh Lisa dev) why everything was using strings instead of symbols (in Rails) since symbols are much faster. That got him looking into the benchmarks, and he found that symbols are about twice as fast (for his minimal test, anyway), and he suggested we switch to those. His word is gold; mine is ignorable. kind of annoying. but anyway, he further went into optimizing the lookup of a giant array of strings, and discovered bsearch. (it's a divide-and-conquer lookup). and here I am wondering why they didn't implement it that way to begin with. 🙄
I don't think I'm learning much here, except how to work with a "mature" codebase. To take a page from @Rutee07, I think "mature" here means the same as in porn: not something you ever want ot see or think about.
I mean, I'm learning other things, too, like how to delegate methods from one model to another, but I have yet to see why you would want to. Every use of it I've explored thus far has just complicated things, like delegating methods on a child of a 1:n relation to the parent. Which child? How does that work? No bloody clue! but it does, somehow, after I copy/pasted a bunch of esoteric legacy bs and fussed with it enough.
I feel like once I get a good grasp of the various payment wrappers, verification/anti-fraud integration, and per-business fraud rules I'll have learned most of what they can offer. Specifically those because I had written a baby version of them at a previous job (Hell), and was trying to architect exactly what this company already has built.
I like a few things about this company. I like my boss. I like the remote work. I like the code reviews. I like the pay. I like the office and some socializing twice a year.
But I don't like the codebase. at all. and I don't have any friends here. My boss is friendly, but he's not a friend. I feel like my last boss (both bosses) were, or could have been if I was more social. But here? I feel alone. I'm assigned work, and my boss is friendly when talking about work, but that's all he's there for. Out of the two female devs I work with, one basically just ignores me, and the other only ever talks about work in ways I can barely understand, and she's a little pushy, and just... really irritating. The "senior" devs (in quotes because they're honestly not amazing) just don't have time, which i understand. but at the same time... i don't have *anyone* to talk to. It really sucks.
I'm not happy here.
I miss my last job.
But the reason I left that one is because this job allows me to move and work remotely. I got a counter-offer from them exactly matching my current job, sans the code reviews. but we haven't moved yet. and if I leave and go back there without having moved, it'll look like i just abandoned them. and that's the last thing I want them to think.
So, I'm stuck here for awhile.
not that it's a bad thing, but i'm feeling overwhelmed and stressed. and it's just not a good fit. but maybe I'll actually start learning things. and I suppose that's also why I took the job.
So, ever onward, I guess.
It would just be nice if I could take some of the happy along with me.7 -
it's funny, how doing something for ages but technically kinda the wrong way, makes you hate that thing with a fucking passion.
In my case I am talking about documentation.
At my study, it was required to write documentation for every project, which is actually quite logical. But, although I am find with some documentation/project and architecture design, they went to the fucking limit with this shit.
Just an example of what we had to write every time again (YES FOR EVERY MOTHERFUCKING PROJECT) and how many pages it would approximately cost (of custom content, yes we all had templates):
Phase 1 - Application design (before doing any programming at all):
- PvA (general plan for how to do the project, from who was participating to the way of reporting to your clients and so on - pages: 7-10.
- Functional design, well, the application design in an understandeable way. We were also required to design interfaces. (Yes, I am a backender, can only grasp the basics of GIMP and don't care about doing frontend) - pages: 20-30.
- Technical design (including DB scheme, class diagrams and so fucking on), it explains it mostly I think so - pages: 20-40.
Phase 2 - 'Writing' the application
- Well, writing the application of course.
- Test Plan (so yeah no actual fucking cases yet, just how you fucking plan to test it, what tools you need and so on. Needed? Yes. but not as redicilous as this) - pages: 7-10.
- Test cases: as many functions (read, every button click etc is a 'function') as you have - pages: one excel sheet, usually at least about 20 test cases.
Phase 3 - Application Implementation
- Implementation plan, describes what resources will be needed and so on (yes, I actually had to write down 'keyboard' a few times, like what the actual motherfucking fuck) - pages: 7-10.
- Acceptation test plan, (the plan and the actual tests so two files of which one is an excel/libreoffice calc file) - pages: 7-10.
- Implementation evalutation, well, an evaluation. Usually about 7-10 FUCKING pages long as well (!?!?!?!)
Phase 4 - Maintaining/managing of the application
- Management/maintainence document - well, every FUCKING rule. Usually 10-20 pages.
- SLA (Service Level Agreement) - 20-30 pages.
- Content Management Plan - explains itself, same as above so 20-30 pages (yes, what the fuck).
- Archiving Document, aka, how are you going to archive shit. - pages: 10-15.
I am still can't grasp why they were surprised that students lost all motivation after realizing they'd have to spend about 1-2 weeks BEFORE being allowed to write a single line of code!
Calculation (which takes the worst case scenario aka the most pages possible mostly) comes to about 230 pages. Keep in mind that some pages will be screenshots etc as well but a lot are full-text.
Yes, I understand that documentation is needed but in the way we had to do it, sorry but that's just not how you motivate students to work for their study!
Hell, students who wrote the entire project in one night which worked perfectly with even easter eggs and so on sometimes even got bad grades BECAUSE THEIR DOCUMENTATION WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH.
For comparison, at my last internship I had to write documentation for the REST API I was writing. Three pages, providing enough for the person who had to, to work with it! YES THREE PAGES FOR THE WHOLE MOTHERFUCKING PROJECT.
This is why I FUCKING HATE the word 'documentation'.36 -
Client (not for the first time): Your work sucks. I had to have this email formatting re-done before I sent it out.
Me: *sees that the email sent matches the work I did exactly with no changes*
Client (months later): I need you to do maintenance on my website.
Me: *does quick maintenance for free but sends update on status of work done and amount left in retainer agreement*
Client: You're too expensive! You started working with me for $X/hr, then you went up to $Y/hr and now you're all the way up to $Z/hr! You're not worth that!
Me: *fires client by refunding the remainder of retainer and sends client a list of local, cheaper providers*
Client: But now I don't have anyone to maintain my website until I find a new provider! Why have you done this to me? Waaaahhhhh!
Me (in the most professional language I can muster): Because you're a biotch and I'm tired of your verbal abuse. Maybe try not to be such a dbag to that next provider, mmm'kay?7 -
My client is trying to force me to sign an ethics agreement that would allow them to sue me if found in breach of it. At the same time they are scraping eBay's data without their consent and refuse to sign the licence agreement. Apparently they don't understand irony.3
-
Any code I make for clients is under a strict license unless specified otherwise. It's a straight forward license pretty much stating that they can't sell it or claim it as their own. I've had a few clients break that license but one stood out. I had made a piece of software that cost her over $2,500 due to the amount of hours that went into it. The transaction went along smoothly so there was nothing to be alarmed about. She came back for more work about 6 months later and I decided to do some checking up on her to see how her business was going. Immediately smack bang on the home page was my software being sold for $30/month. Needless to say I was outraged. She said there was no talk of a license which I responded with pulling out the contract that she signed where it explained that signing the contract meant she was in agreement with the specified license. 2 months after this started, I'm being awarded any profits made from said software along with her closing down the website. As much of a bitch as she was, it wasn't worth my time trying to get more out of her.5
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Four meetings today.
Legal was not involved in legal agreement changes until I refused to make them without Legal signing off. Legal changed several things, leading to:
Project scope changed size from large to minuscule to small to medium.
Details changed at every step.
Despite being incredibly structured and process-heavy, people at this company are so disorganized. 😕4 -
Have people using React actually read the license agreement? Basically, if Facebook want your app, they can develop a similar, and revoke your license to React...14
-
Client asks for a sponsorship page that has rows of logos, 6 rows total. "Okay."
They want the logos at the top to be bigger than the ones below. "Sure."
They want the logos to decrease in size by 20% per row. "But there are 6 rows...?"
"Our agreement says 20% difference between each sponsor tier. Can you do it?"
"Okay...but, I don't think you want 20%..."
"Hey, why can't we see any logos on the bottom row..."
😤😤😤14 -
Was asked to help a team of interns in a remote country, finish an app. Not only were they terrible at literally every aspect of development, but were arrogant and argued their "new" ways were right.
Spent weeks on the project being nice, trying to help them, sending them links to standards and documents, pointing out unit tests shouldn't be failing, everyone needs to have the same versions of the tools etc. You know, basic shit.
Things got quite heated a few weeks in when they started completely ignoring me. Shit was breaking all over the place and crashing, as I thought we were going to build it one way, and they went and built it another.
Was practically begging the team architect and my manager for help dealing with them. Only reply I got was the usual "were aware of the problem and looking into it" bullshit.
Eventually after the app was done, a mutual agreement was reached that the 2 teams would split (I maintain they were kicked out). All the local devs were happy, managers had mentioned how difficult they were and it would be great for us to finally work on our own.
So I thought everything was fine ... until my end of year performance review came along.
Seems I'm quite poor at "working with others" and I "don't try hard enough with others", it was clear I was struggling with the remote team and "made no effort".
WELL FUCK RIGHT OFF
Not being cocky, but I've never had anything like that in a performance review for the past 7 years. I'm a hard worker, and never have trouble making friends with colleagues. Everyone in the country complained about these remote fuckers, even the manager, who I begged for help. And the end result is I need to work harder.
I came in early, stayed late to fit their timezone, took extra tasks, did research for them, wrote docs. And I was told to work harder.
Only reason I didn't quit, was my internal transfer request was approved lol. New team is looking at projects orders of magnitude more impressive, never been happier.3 -
PM emailed me a document from a customer to distribute it to the right people.
Me (in my head): WTF? You are the PM, that's your fucking job.
But I opened the document and read it. Some blah about requirements we discussed with the customer earlier. And the request to sign it as agreement on the requirements. The customer even put the names of the people at the end, he suspected to be the right ones.
So I send an email back to PM that this is project stuff, not my business. Case closed for me.
Half an our later PM enters my office, telling me he thought I was the right guy for this topic and he didn't know who else could be interested in it.
So I told him that this document is about defining project requirements and that he could have sent it to the people that are mentioned at the end of the document.
Turned out he didn't even opened the document. F...A... Wasted my time instead of doing his job.
Guess next time I'll be reading his documents at as good as he does. -
So a good friend of mine calls me up on Friday night, and he tells me about his close friend abroad who messed up and, without going into details, needs me to do his C# project for a course. The deadline was on Monday. I said I couldn't promise anything, but send me the requirments and I'll look into it.
Now, the pay was good and I felt that the guy's reasons were valid (and that the prof was being a dick), also the project was doable in a day and a half, so I said ok. I spent my entire Saturday working on it till I had most of it done: I just needed to refine the code and do the report.
I sent the app to him so that he can check it out, to which he responds by freaking out and explaining that he has missed most of the classes and has a barely passing average (huh maybe the prof isn't so much of a dick). If I get him a high grade, the gig will be up and his prof will fail him. He wants a 60-70/100, no more.
Feeling obliged by our agreement, I spent my Sunday complicating trivial code, breaking standards, and adding minor bugs. Had I know this was what it was going to lead to, I would have never accepted.
It's just so much harder to break good code than to write it.6 -
Yesterday I stayed at home sick. Had a bad case of the EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA FROM HELL. Was feeling ok but could not walk away from me throne.
Went in today cuz the lead was not gonna be there and shit always breaks on Freyja's day as we all know.
1 and a half hours before we clock out and go home someone calls saying that students are trying to drop from classes at the last minute and our app ain't doing it.
I "fixed" the app last week and ran a small login test. It work so I thought it was fine. Stupid me for making unprofessional and retarded assumptions.
Manager freaks out. The entire school freaks out. Coworker lols cuz he ain't got to work on it. I start mind debugging the entire bitcheridoo.
45 minutes later...and I was able to successfully go through almost 15k lines of code of php/html/js code and fucking FIXED it with tests and all for real.
Went at it hard. Babe ass manager was like 0.0 and then (͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Called head office and told them everything was undr control.
Dropped the phone like a mic. Mic drop.
Then I looked at manager and coworker and said "ya I fucked up, but I am still the king"
Both nodded in agreement.
Everyone got wet with my sheer awesome troubleshooting php master skills.
Got home thinking about how boss I am.
Fucking Texas af b. Can't touch this heat. The rangers still suck and so do the cowboys. The astros and the texans don't exist because there is only room for one. Go spurs.
Still have diarrhea.
Fuck yeah.8 -
Every single time when trying to download JRE or JDK from Oracle I forget to tick it. Every single time. Like, just now. :)
3 -
So i've spent the day:
a) Finding evidence (again) of product not doing their job, to send on to one of my managers. So we can again discuss why she's still here.
b) Explaining to my iOS developer that although all the devs are in agreement that 2 of them are not pulling their weight and shouldn't be here ... they will definitely still be here because management actually want to keep our multi-timezone setup as they see it as beneficial. We, do not.
c) Having a meeting with another manager, in a different department. (Backstory, a member of their team has had many complaints filed against them by various members of the building, including one from my team). To let them know that my employee felt like you ignored her concerns and complaints and are going to allow this person pass their probation without considering the implications.
I hope to actually find some time in the reminder of the day to actually achieve something, rather than just telling skidmarks that they are in fact skidmarks.
... but probably won't due to 3 hours of pointless back to back meetings, where we answer the same few questions every week.
I really do love being a tech lead. So refreshing. -
Before starting a job at company CUNT, we had an interview at which I told them I do not want to work on legacy monolithic codebases. We had a nice agreement and they offered me to work as a back-end with one of their projects. I was super excited to start. CUNT was very culty, always talks about how carrying for employees they are and always keep promises on their end of the table.
A week has passed, the codebase is superb legacy shit hole, no fucking standards, monolithic as fuck (BE and FE projects live in one project folder with tons of depreciated tools - there are no docs for them. That’s how old they are). They even have secret folder in their project with YOU GUESSED IT - secret keys.
Told CTO today, that I want to switch projects, because this was not the thing I signed up for and remember THEY ALWAYS CARE ABOUT THEIR EMPLOYEES AND PROMISES MADE. He basically told me, that project owners (other company) will not understand this culturally and I can either wait it out and possibly get my hands on a better project or fuck off right now.
Also, I was told, that my judgment was garbage worth and I should work longer with project “shit hole” to fully understand it.
Such a fucking salesman.
Anyways, I told that this situation is not culturally appropriate for me either as they gave me a sort of promise and I wont leave the company as I just switched jobs and cannot afford to do that again. I’ll hopefully get another position in another project soon.
WTF IS WORNG WITH PEOPLE8 -
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.
Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show his work. Visibly upset, Satan cries and says, "I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out."
"Very well," says God, "let us see if Jesus has fared any better."
Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers.
Satan is astonished. He stutters, "B-b-but how?! I lost everything, yet Jesus' program is intact! How did he do it?"
God chuckles, "Everybody knows... Jesus saves."2 -
@Everyone, I would like to congratulate @Haxk20 on being the victor of our little upvote fight.
It was a hard battle, and although I was ahead briefly, I would like to name @Haxk20 the victor!
Starting ++:
@Haxk20: 36,872
@C0D4: 35,401
As of post:
@Haxk20: 39,935
@C0D4: 38,454
That's an impressive: 6,116 up votes in total from everyone involved.
As I have noticed requests for the repo, i would like to state It will be deleted, but I will re-release it as an empty template in the event others want to use it later - as per our original agreement.19 -
Biggest challenge I overcame as dev? One of many.
Avoiding a life sentence when the 'powers that be' targeted one of my libraries for the root cause of system performance issues and I didn't correct that accusation with a flame thrower.
What the accusation? What I named the library. Yep. The *name* was causing every single problem in the system.
Panorama (very, very expensive APM system at the time) identified my library in it's analysis, the calls to/from SQLServer was the bottleneck
We had one of Panorama's engineers on-site and he asked what (not the actual name) MyLibrary was and (I'll preface I did not know or involved in any of the so-called 'research') a crack team of developers+managers researched the system thoroughly and found MyLibrary was used in just about every project. I wrote the .Net 1.1 MyLibrary as a mini-ORM to simplify the execution of database code (stored procs, etc) and gracefully handle+log database exceptions (auto-logged details such as the target db, stored procedure name, parameter values, etc, everything you'd need to troubleshoot database errors). This was before Dapper and the other fancy tools used by kids these days.
By the time the news got to me, there was a team cobbled together who's only focus was to remove any/every trace of MyLibrary from the code base. Using Waterfall, they calculated it would take at least a year to remove+replace MyLibrary with the equivalent ADO.Net plumbing.
In a department wide meeting:
DeptMgr: "This day forward, no one is to use MyLibrary to access the database! It's slow, unprofessionally named, and the root cause of all the database issues."
Me: "What about MyLibrary is slow? It's excecuting standard the ADO.Net code. Only extra bit of code is the exception handling to capture the details when the exception is logged."
DeptMgr: "We've spent the last 6 weeks with the Panorama engineer and he's identified MyLibrary as the cause. Company has spent over $100,000 on this software and we have to make fact based decisions. Look at this slide ... "
<DeptMgr shows a histogram of the stacktrace, showing MyLibrary as the slowest>
Me: "You do realize that the execution time is the database call itself, not the code. In that example, the invoice call, it's the stored procedure that taking 5 seconds, not MyLibrary."
<at this point, DeptMgr is getting red-face mad>
AreaMgr: "Yes...yes...but if we stopped using MyLibrary, removing the unnecessary layers, will make the code run faster."
<typical headknodd-ers knod their heads in agreement>
Dev01: "The loading of MyLibrary takes CPU cycles away from code that supports our customers. Every CPU cycle counts."
<headknod-ding continues>
Me: "I'm really confused. Maybe I'm looking at the data wrong. On the slide where you highlighted all the bottlenecks, the histogram shows the latency is the database, I mean...it's right there, in red. Am I looking at it wrong?"
<this was meeting with 20+ other devs, mgrs, a VP, the Panorama engineer>
DeptMgr: "Yes you are! I know MyLibrary is your baby. You need to check your ego at the door and face the facts. Your MyLibrary is a failed experiment and needs to be exterminated from this system!"
Fast forward 9 months, maybe 50% of the projects updated, come across the documentation left from the Panorama. Even after the removal of MyLibrary, there was zero increases in performance. The engineer recommended DBAs start optimizing their indexes and other N+1 problems discovered. I decide to ask the developer who lead the re-write.
Me: "I see that removing MyLibrary did nothing to improve performance."
Dev: "Yes, DeptMgr was pissed. He was ready to throw the Panorama engineer out a window when he said the problems were in the database all along. Didn't you say that?"
Me: "Um, so is this re-write project dead?"
Dev: "No. Removing MyLibrary introduced all kinds of bugs. All the boilerplate ADO.Net code caused a lot of unhandled exceptions, then we had to go back and write exception handling code."
Me: "What a failure. What dipshit would think writing more code leads to less bugs?"
Dev: "I know, I know. We're so far behind schedule. We had to come up with something. I ended up writing a library to make replacing MyLibrary easier. I called it KnightRider. Like the TV show. Everyone is excited to speed up their code with KnightRider. Same method names, same exception handling. All we have to do is replace MyLibrary with KnightRider and we're done."
Me: "Won't the bottlenecks then point to KnightRider?"
Dev: "Meh, not my problem. Panorama meets primarily with the DBAs and the networking team now. I doubt we ever use Panorama to look at our C# code."
Needless to say, I was (still) pissed that they had used MyLibrary as dirty word and a scapegoat for months when they *knew* where the problems were. Pissed enough for a flamethrower? Maybe.6 -
Just recalled the time we sent the new apprentice developer to HR for a "verbal agreement form" to request his birthday off. HR Came back down with him unsure as to where to find the verbal agreement forms.
"Well, that's not very funny." - HR2 -
SeniorDev: "If we were only allowed to use C# 6 features, we could reduce our code base by 30%"
- other devs nodding their heads in agreement -
Me: "So, are you going to change our entire code base to be C# 6 compliant?"
SeniorDev: "Uh, oh hell no."
Me: "So those C# 6 features are going to reduce our code base by 0%?"
SeniorDev turns around without saying a word.
Getting a bit awkwardly quiet now. Better watch my back.4 -
The thing with meetings is that most don't know what a (formal) meeting is.
A meeting has a specific time frame, a defined agenda with specific topics and a moderator or an agreement on a common netiquette.
That's a meeting.
A meeting is not a place to put your willy on the desk and proof to everyone that your cock is thx to operation a long schlong who won't get hard, nor that you don't know how to shave, even less to measure the size of your genitals.
It's neither the time to eat and slurp like a fucking hobgoblin, nor to drink like an alcoholic who hasn't had a drop of alcohol in the last hour.
Parents, I don't care what your satanic offspring achieved today, nor how cute they are, even less what booboo they have.
Crybabies, keep your whining for after meeting time, maybe even stop crying and just have a nice talk outside of allocated time frames to discuss whom hurt whom the most and who has the most sand in his clit.
Get to the fucking point.
If I wanted to read a trilogy to understand what you contribute, I'd have written it on the agenda.
If it's not on the agenda, cram it in your butt cheeks for the next time you need to shit.
If you can't converse with people at all, the meeting is allocated at least 24 hours before it happens.
Prepare yourself for goddamn sake.
You could even read out a predefined text if you want, noone cares.11 -
I had security reopen our test-user last week. I could run the tests once, then they started failing with "blocked user due to too many attempts at logging in". Huh, that's weird. I go through everything, every script, every scheduled task, every nook and cranny of every drive on every machine I could reach, and make sure the password is updated everywhere. Reopen account. Same shit.
I email around to some people, they don't use it, one guy asks if I checked x, y and z, I did. Then he's sure we don't use it anywhere else.
It's one of our fucking contractors that took one of our scripts (that they're supposed to have duplicate copies of) and forgot to change to their own credentials. That's literally the agreement, take our scripts and change the user and run them on your machines.
Afhfjdkdhdjdbd stop locking me out of everything with your incompetence. I email them, some cunt gets back to me asking for the new password. NO. USE. YOUR. OWN. CREDENTIALS. I KNOW YOU HAVE THEM, THEY'RE HERE IN THE LIST AND BEING USED IN ALL OTHER SCRIPTS AAAAAAAAAHHH6 -
I’m trying to add digit separators to a few amount fields. There’s actually three tickets to do this in various places, and I’m working on the last of them.
I had a nightmare debugging session earlier where literally everything would 404 unless I navigated through the site in a very roundabout way. I never did figure out the cause, but I found a viable workaround. Basically: the house doesn’t exist if you use the front door, but it’s fine if you go through the garden gate, around the back, and crawl in through the side window. After hours of debugging I eventually discovered that if I unlocked the front door with a different key, everything was fine… but nobody else has this problem?
Whatever.
Onto the problem at hand!
I’m trying to add digit separators to some values. I found a way to navigate to the page in question (more difficult than it sounds), and … I don’t know what view is rendering the page. Or what controller. Or how it generates its text.
The URL is encrypted, so I get no clues there. (Which was lead dev’s solution to having scrapeable IDs instead of just, you know, fixing them). The encryption also happens in middleware, so it’s a nightmare to work through. And it’s by the lead dev, so the code is fucking atrocious.
The view… could be one of many, and I don’t even know where they are. Or what layout. Or what partials go into building it.
All of the text on the page are “resources” — think named translations that support plus nested macros. I don’t know their names, and the bits of text I can search for are used fucking everywhere. “Confirmation number” (the most unique of them) turns up 79 matches. “Fee” showed up in 8310 places before my editor gave up looking. Really.
The table displaying the data, which is what I actually care about, isn’t built in JS or markup, but is likely a resource that goes through heavy processing. It gets generated in a controller somewhere (I don’t know the resource name so I can’t find it), and passed through several layers of “dynamic form” abstraction, eventually turned into markup, and rendered as a partial template. At least, that’s how it worked in the previous ticket. I found a resource that looks right, and there’s only the one. I found the nested macros it uses for the amount and total, and added the separators there… only to find that it doesn’t work.
Fucking dead end.
And i have absolutely nothing else to go on.
Page title? “Show”
URL? /~LiolV8N8KrIgaozEgLv93s…
Text? All from macros with unknown names. Can’t really search for it without considerable effort.
Table? Doesn’t work.
Text in the table? doesn’t turn up anything new.
Legal agreement? There are multiple, used in many places, generates them dynamically via (of course) resources, and even looking through the method usages, doesn’t narrow it down very much.
Just.
What the fuck?
Why does this need to be so fucking complicated?
And what genius decided “$100000.00” doesn’t need separators? Right, the lot of them because separators aren’t used ANYWHERE but in code I authored. Like, really? This is fintech. You’d think they would be ubiquitous.
And the sheer amount of abstraction?
Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid.11 -
Init and Hello. My name is git and this is my story.
I just arrived in this system recently by the apt highway. It's not the only way though. Some for example used the npm hype-train, others arrived from the ssh shore. No matter where we came from the next step on our agenda was time to introduce our self at the event destined for all new-comers to the system.
"As many of you I reside in the usr-bin district. I'm really into history and commitment! I like it when people work together, so I'm always eager to bring all branches together."
"But what is it actually good for?", asked Curl, which I already met at the bus station. Many nodded in agreement. It was odd. Somehow I felt not quite at home. All the others seemed so different based on their field of work.
"We have worked here in a really agile environment for ages. There is no need for any kind of strange bureaucracy.", said another voice.
All attempts to convince them from the beauty of history or a little bit of management were unsuccessful. It was just the beginning of a not so interesting stage in my life - to say the least.
Today was another of 'those' days. I live in this community for quiet a while now and unfortunately nothing really changed - at least for the good. I sat on my branch of the tree with all the others around and there was nothing really to do for me. Again. I mean, actually it's true. I have to admit it. There is just no work on this world for someone like me. All the others seem to be so busy, while I just have to sit around and question my own existence. Since I grew tired asking these questions to myself, I stopped it. I can't do a thing actually. That's not how this world works.
"Hey fagit, anything meaningful to add to our delightful conversation?", nginx shouted over to me from another branch of the tree. Before I was able to give an indifferent answer the voice just continued.
"Oh, sorry. I forgot that you have no purpose after all. Well, never mind!"
Everyone started laughing at me. It was not too bad by the way. Actually, this was quite ordinary. These fucktards completely ran out of creativity. If it wasn't for that mere emptiness gaping right above my guts, I'd actually be disappointed. I even got accustomed to the alias 'fagit'. Quiet sad given the fact that i really like my real name. If only someone would mind using it... First too quiet to notice but growing in intensity a rumbling emerged from somewhere deep within the tree. Out of a sudden everyone stopped laughing. The voices slowly faded while the growling from afar grew louder. It had come. Not more than a shadow reached out from the tree and faster than anyone could comprehend nginx was simply gone. Killed in an instance.
Disclaimer: This story is fictional. No systems were harmed in its creation.4 -
Now I have to register on oracle website with a my company name and work phone before i can download jre or jdk. That's it boys and girls. You're unemployed? No minecraft for you!20
-
Fun day, lots of relief and catharsis!
Client I was wanting to fire has apparently decided that the long term support contract I knew was bullshit from go will instead be handled by IBM India and it's my job to train them in the "application." Having worked with this team (the majority of whom have been out of university for less than a year), I can say categorically that the best of them can barely manage to copy and paste jQuery examples from SO, so best of fucking luck.
I said, "great!," since I'd been planning on quitting anyways. I even handed them an SOW stating I would train them for 2 days on the application's design and structure, and included a rider they dutifully signed that stated, "design and structure will cover what is needed to maintain the application long term in terms of its basic routing, layout and any 'pages' that we have written for this application. The client acknowledges that 3rd party (non-[us]) documentation is available for the technologies used, but not written by [us], effective support of those platforms will devolve to their respective vendors on expiry of the current support contract."
Contract in hand, and client being too dumb to realize that their severing of the maintenance agreement voids their support contract, I can safely share what's not contractually covered:
- ReactiveX
- Stream based programming
- Angular 9
- Any of the APIs
- Dotnet core
- Purescript
- Kafka
- Spark
- Scala
- Redis
- K8s
- Postgres
- Mongo
- RabbitMQ
- Cassandra
- Cake
- pretty much anything not in a commit
I'm a little giddy just thinking about the massive world of hurt they've created for themselves. Couldn't have happened to nicer assholes.3 -
Most pissed off? Must have been the time I created a $10,000 hole in a marketing team's budget after trying to build a Tetris-style Facebook app game (back when FB apps were all the rage). It turned out that Tetris, which was up to that point commonly considered as public domain, had been scooped up by a patent troll who had made a convincing case that he had found and gotten agreement from the originator of the idea (a Russian dude who may or may not have been its original source). I had to scrap the whole project and explain what I did to an old-school manager who didn't even know how to operate a computer. That resulted in my losing credibility as a team member for the next 6 years. I never lived it down. I was pissed mostly at myself for following my assumption and not doing any patent research.3
-
Glassdoor is the perfect example of how annoying, even just opening a website can be, first it asks for your permission to use your location, then half the screen is filled with a cookie agreement and after you clicked it all away, you get a "download our app" filling just 30% of your screen, now that you clicked that all away, you may use the website, ludicrous.
edit: well fuck, just noticed the app message glitched away when taking the screenshot, you get the idea though
6 -
!rant
tl;dr; quit my job last monday. going to grow my side hustle into full time freelancing.
I am so exited.
---
Story time:
I am working full time as a jack of all trades and also have a side business where I coach people on an ERP for doors/fenestration and also write custom software in c#.
I was able to manage both over ~4 years, with customer amount slowly growing (only doing B2B).
Last month I opened an account at a freelancer website just for the lulz and damn after a short amount of time the orders exploded. I had to shut it down again because I cannot manage the amount of work. But did manage to win a fair amount of customers that will keep me busy for the next year or two.
Spoke to my employer and told them about the situation (they know about my side business and it's all mentioned in the contracts). Said that I would need half the amount of hours with my business to reach the same amount of money and that working as an employee makes no sense for me in terms of money. I would however like to work 1 to 2 days in a week for them because working there is fun, even when its financially uninteresting.
they took one week to prepare a position and then invited me to a meeting. "we offer you 32 hours a week. if you want more, you have to make a descision. As a self employed person you have risk and we as an employer do not want to carry that risk for you and we do not want to finance your self employment" (etc.)
Thought I am in the wrong movie. I took that into the weekend and thought a lot about what has been said.
And last monday I invited to a follow up and told them
"sorry, I think I was not clear enough. Working for you is of no interest in terms of money. You do not finance me, it's the other way around. Sadly we do not come to an agreement, as 8 hours less does not fit the need. You said I need to make a descision. I do not want to do this but I'm quitting".
They responded with "Oh that is sad to hear. Is there anything that we can make so you do not leave?"
"Either pay me the same I would make as a self employed or follow my conditions"
Did not get a response on that.
I now have three months to prepare myself for self employment.
Currently working 40h + growing side business + getting the whole german bureaucracy shit together.
Tough time but hell this feels so damn good.
Just wanted to share this :)5 -
Random fact #1
AMD (Advanced Micro Devices) was producing Intel 8080 clones (AMD Am9080) before developing own CPUs. Originally they were produced without Intel license. This clone was developed basing on pictures of Intel 8080 itself and pictures of logic diagrams. These processors were much cheaper than the original model. Later AMD and Intel came up with agreement and the Am9080 was fully licensed making AMD official second party vendor.
And yeah, few years later and we got a war between two of those giants. Remember when in mid 2000s AMD almost beat the Intel marketshare?
Bonus Fact: there is AMD logo on Ferrari Formula 1 cars since 2002 (look at the front wing)
6 -
U know this guy, whos Shady AS FUCK..
He waited until the end of the daily(when noone was putting attention) to make an agreement with the PO about some decisions of the user history..
He doesnt even know WTF is doing, so he wanted to swap his user history for another one..
U & ALL THE PEOPLE WHO NEVER WORK WITH THE TEAM & USE PRIVATES CHATS TO CONTROL OTHERS!
FUCK U!!3 -
Why is it what so many developers think that they are the sole genius surrounded by idiots and completely lack in interpersonal skills or the ability to see other people's arguments as valid? Honestly, with some people it's like working with an emotionally stunted teenager. I literally spoke to someone yesterday who thinks it's impossible to come to a compromise or agreement about anything unless there is a third party to arbitrate and mindlessly insists on his own way in literally every disagreement, even after admitting his logic is faulty. It's like watching a spotty 17 year old argue about politics online I swear it.5
-
A month ago, a company called my friend for an interview. They had a good talk but at the end they couldn't agree on the salary.
A week later they called him for a technical interview and they're ready to renegotiate with him the salary he's asking for. The Interview went successful and everything seems fine. They told that they'll send him a mail about the offer they're proposing.
2 days later he got the mail and the offer was kinda good, so he confirmed the agreement and they planned to sign the contract today.
After he went to the office and the manager came 1 hour late and he told him and i quote '' I'm sorry your application has been rejected, there's a women that refused to hire you ''.
I mean come on how can someone be an asshole more then this.
Just to add this company still uses eclipse for android development.3 -
Infinity is defined by the time it takes for a group of developers to reach an agreement about what is the "Definition of Done".3
-
And now they are threatening us... Brilliant!
- they refuse to sign a legal agreement with us [for our services]
- they only gave us a verbal promise they will pay for our services
- they revoke lots of our accesses
- another company is taking over their product we were hired to look after before. Now they demand us do things for them for free
- a few integrations are malfunctioning with premature EOF [while reading a response]. I had escalated this with the most throughout case analysis I have done in my entire life. Three times over the last 2 years. Explaining every single detail that needs to be done, how, by whom and how to interpret the results. Escalations went to their high level mgmt. And directly had been rerouted to /dev/null...
- now they asked us to fix this whole shit. For free ofc, they have no money to pay us..
- they begged
- when that didn't work - they started threatening to route all their customers' complaints to us and flood us with them
at first I was proud to work on their project. I didn't want to leave it when my manager asked me to. A national level project, making a difference for my own country. But now.....
that's gov, my friends. That's politics and power games.8 -
So, a few months back my mother had some issues with her windows 10 box not being able to do proper backups to a backup partition. At the same time I was pulling insane hours at work and writing on a eBook on commission for a guy, besides having small kids with on and off flu and shit.
Needless to say, I didn't have time to look at the backup issues. Well, even though my mom is one of those dogs you can't teach new tricks, she has always been resourceful enough to get help with things.
This time she picked up the phone and called Microsoft Support, got some guys to remote in and take a look. They messed around a bit and said they were done.
She phoned me up later that day to tell me how proud she was of herself for doing that. Of course, she skipped telling me the important bit about she actually calling them, rather describing it as "Microsoft was just on my computer and fixed it".
You can imagine my immediate reaction, cold sweat running down my back, adrenalin rushing in as I dug through the details of what had happened.
A few days later she calls me up again and tells me the problem is back, and we agree that even though the MS dudes was not able to fix it at first, she should try again, as she had a ticket to reference.
The next attempt by MS actually fried her partitions, and apparently they had f-ed up trying to delete and recreate the backup partition.
That's not the worst of it though. Since they fried her disk, her computer crashed and naturally the remoting won't work. In our country, they have no people on the ground to do hands on help, and they didn't have a partner near by. Her not having a win 10 usb stick, nor a spare computer to make one, she was in a surreal predicament.
She was also quite pissed, and pissed off mums are not to be messed with. She managed to get Microsoft to agree to cover the costs of a non-partner to visit her to fix the problems, and using her as the middle man, they made an agreement with the 3rd-party tech support company.
After the box was fixed though, some more issues arose... regarding billing. The 3rd-party tech support was unable to get in contact with the person at MS that was going to sign off on the bill, and again using my mom as the middle man, it was agreed that my mom, as the customer, was to be reimbursed for the bill to the 3rd-party.
Guess what... 3 months went by, with weekly follow-ups and nagging from my mom, and still no money...
At this time, I had time to help her, and after some digging and borderline stalking, we managed to get the phone numbers of some of the higher ups in my country, and she started calling them directly.
After talking to a couple who refused to help, she reached the Vice President of the country branch, and was finally able to talk to someone who gave a shit.
Still took over a month more to actually get the money, but now she had someone who actually gave her statuses, receipts and ETAs.
FUCK!4 -
Couple of jobs back we got bought out by that massive shipping company with the red and yellow colors.
We used macs and some high up moron decided it was a good idea to put on domain policy restrictions on our macs, but developers can't work without admin access so if we wanted to keep said admin access, we had to sign a written agreement indicating that we were not allowed to do certain thing, like change our wallpaper or install personal music players, you know like Spotify, which at the time was what most of us used.
Now this was just a nice cherry on the cake of stupid descision that was making me rethink working there. Thanks to the high demand for skilled front ends, it was 11 am when we got this, 3pm I had comnfirmed my interview for the next day.
An hour later our manager called us all in to explain this was BS formalities. Well too fucking late, learn to communicate you dumb shit.1 -
tfw...
• the new "sr dev" asks what the point of TDD is
• being polite, I answer in an ELI5 format
• rest of the room nods head in agreement
• new "sr dev" still has baffled look on face -
Regus sent me to collections.
Jist: if you ever think about renting an office from Regus, for the love of your bank account and your credit, just don't. Go into the kitchen and pan-fry your face instead. it'll be better.
Moral: get it in writing. What is "it"? Fucking everything.
------
I needed someplace quiet away from my children to work, so I rented an office from Regus. They said they had a minimum 6-month contract, which is fine, but at the time I was pretty sure I would be moving within three to five. They said they understood and offered the quivalent of a month-to-month plan: I could cancel my contract whenever I wanted, given a few weeks' notice, and that would be that. It wasn't in writing, but both the accounts person and the regional manager were there offering it to me, and they seemed cool. Awesome! I agreed, signed the contract, and paid a hefty damage deposit.
Long story short, I ended up hating the office, and chose to bear the distractions at home instead. Seeing how much I disliked it, the accounts person I talked to originally called me and offered to cancel my contract. I agreed, and she walked me through the steps to cancel it and request my deposit back. Done. I aske her if that was it; no more payments, no more contract. "No more," she said. "You're done." I liked the sound of that. Done and done.
The next day, I check my bank account; no deposit.
Two weeks later, still no deposit.
A month later, still no deposit.
They did say it could take up to three fucking months or something, so whatever. I waited.
Another month later, and instead of my refunded deposit, I get an overdue invoice notice? Seriously?
Apparently they never cancelled my contract, don't remember offering me the month-to-month agreement, nor does the very chick I talked to remember telling me over the phone that everything was paid up and done. Apparently my contract wasn't even for six months like they originally promised, but indefinite? despite all of this? and despite the two of us fucking cancelling it? together?
But no, the legal agreement is binding and explicitly states that they are fucking assholes and due their pound of cash.
So fuck that and fuck them.
And in response, they sent me to collections.
Huge fucking surprise.
and now collections is calling me saying I owe $1900, which works out to a lot more than the couple months it's been since I cancelled that crap, AND.
AND IT'S LESS THAN THE FUCKING DEPOSIT REGUS NEVER RETURNED!
SO NOT ONLY DID THEY NEVER CANCEL MY CONTRACT, THEY CHANGED ITS TERMS (or lied up-front) AND DECIDED TO POCKET THE DEPOSIT INSTEAD OF APPLY IT TO MY FUCKING IMAGINARY BALANCE!
FUCK YOU SHADY MOTHERFUCKERS!10 -
How ethical it is to send 1gb email with big picture with word “NO” in response to spam email that wants my agreement ?11
-
you have an intern working in your company, who came in for 3-4 months internship in September,with a notice in advance that he will take 1 month or more of leaves for exams in Nov-dec.
He reminds you in the beginning of October that he would be going on off due to a lot of college stuff happening on alternate days , starting November.
You and he come up to an agreement that its best to free him from his role in october end and he may join gain when he is done with his college work and could come back fulltime
He works full time in September-October with dedication, leaves with complete reports and submitting his code in November.
NOW DO YOU HAVE A FUCKING RIGHT TO HALT MY SALARY FROM OCTOBER?
YOUR FUCKING HRs HAVE BEEN IGNORING HALF OF MY CALLS AND GIVING LAME EXCUSES IN OTHER HALF.
I WAS NOT A FULL TIME EMPLOYEE YOU ASSHOLES, AND YET I FOLLOWED ALL YOUR STUPID RULES REGARDING NOTICE PERIOD AND STUFF! GIMME MY MONEY :/5 -
Dear, developers
For any freelance project you want to embrace, you should have a written agreement by both parties signed ( clients and you ).
Some client's forget almost anything ....
I'm talking from experience, please be guided....11 -
So apparently some major vpn connection providers got compromised some time ago.
https://twitter.com/hexdefined/...
https://twitter.com/cryptostorm_is/...
adding the fact that major enterprise vpn network providers had security flaws earlier this year
https://sdxcentral.com/articles/...
Sums up what was the major topic in security this year.
At the end I see something like cloud act that allows wiretapping anyone.
https://justice.gov/opa/pr/...
And when we multiply this by number of companies that have services in cloud that sums up privacy these days.
Non existent.6 -
I'm going to start searching for a new job next month. I was let go from my current one because my co-workers were putting in 60~80 hours per week and I was only putting in 40 (plus one 13 hour weekend, which we were paid for. I refused to work the next Sunday and was let go two days later. We were salary exempt; no overtime).
When interviewing this fall, I do intend to list a 40 hour work week as something I'm looking for, but what do I say about my current employment status?
This has only happened once in the past; years ago. I simply said "My contract ended" at the time, and I got a job really quickly so it wasn't an issue.
When a potential employer asks, do I say I was let go because I couldn't keep up with the two months of 60~80 hour work weeks, or do I simply say, "My contract ended." (A little bet of a stretch since I was an FTE, but a work agreement is technically a contract and it technically did end).5 -
I know there is websites that guide you through upcoming gdpr changes*
But I wish there was some website or "awesome"** list that in the same fashion takes you through all things privacy policy, ToS, cookie agreement popup, gdpr etc. to be sure you have it all and it covers the newest standards
I feel I haven't been quite updating myself enough on things like that, so I often miss out a part, whenever I do have to add it myself, but finding it all feels like an endless maze
* https://ultimategdprquiz.com
** https://github.com/sindresorhus/...3 -
Jesus and Satan have an argument as to who is the better programmer. This goes on for a few hours until they come to an agreement to hold a contest with God as the judge. They set themselves before their computers and begin. They type furiously, lines of code streaming up the screen, for several hours straight.
Seconds before the end of the competition, a bolt of lightning strikes, taking out the electricity. Moments later, the power is restored, and God announces that the contest is over. He asks Satan to show his work. Visibly upset, Satan cries and says, “I have nothing. I lost it all when the power went out.”
“Very well,” says God, “let us see if Jesus has fared any better.”
Jesus presses a key, and the screen comes to life in vivid display, the voices of an angelic choir pour forth from the speakers.
Satan is astonished. He stutters, “B-b-but how?! I lost everything, yet Jesus’ program is intact! How did he do it?”
God chuckles, “Everybody knows… Jesus saves.” -
Some customers are nice.
Ive been working with a customer to enable a feature in the database. It was tough, because the escalation from support was your standard 'Customer wants apples in the T-1000, please do the needful'. After several emails back and forth we reach an agreement about what needs to be done.
This is something I'm sure can't be done. I test it in my local install, yep, confirmed that's normal behaviour. The customer, however, is stalwart - he's suggesting changes to the database that would potentially give him what he needs. I figure if he's going to this much effort, I'll confirm with our product specialist to see if there's a way around it.
Five minutes later I'm emailing the customer with an apology as I have unwittingly never known of, or committed to memory, the existence of a distinctly non-hidden check box that enables this exact function. I pass this box several times a week at least, and I've worked on this software for two and a half years. Never have I needed to use it, so my brain just processed it as background imagery.
The customer just responded with the kindest email absolving me of my sins, thanking me for my humbleness and for my time.
I want him to have more problems so I can work with him more.2 -
Oh, boy, prepare for the shit to fly at your face at light speed. Here it comes!
Been working for 6 weeks at this new company now. But at a department that has nothing to do with the job in my contract. Went to the boss and asked how long I have to do this the first week and he said "It will be 4-8 weeks. After this (department A) you'll be placed in department B". I was like "Ok".
6 weeks pass by and there's no sound from him. Went to his office and complained that something slowly needs to happen (changewise). He agreed and I went back to work.
Few hours pass by and my coworker gets a call from him that I will be working at department C from now on with no more information (such as end date) given. My coworker told me that and I asked if he didn't tell my coworker about the end date or any change of plans regarding department B. My coworker didn't know anything.
After the work ended I went to the boss again to ask him why there was this sudden change that he could have told me before in today's meeting or if this sudden change will interfere with our old plan. Instead he passive aggressively told me that he already told me that I will be placed at department B in 2 weeks.
No shit, Sherlock. I already fucking knew that you told me that. I just wanted to know if this sudden change changed our old agreement.
This company is so fucking unorganized. Jesus!4 -
I've just noticed something when reading the EU copyright reform. It actually all sounds pretty reasonable. Now, hear me out, I swear that this will make sense in the end.
Article 17p4 states the following:
If no authorisation [by rightholders] is granted, online content-sharing service providers shall be liable for unauthorised acts of communication to the public, including making available to the public, of copyright-protected works and other subject matter, unless the service providers demonstrate that they have:
(a) made best efforts to obtain an authorisation, and
(b) made, in accordance with high industry standards of professional diligence, best efforts to ensure the unavailability of specific works and other subject matter for which the rightholders have provided the service providers with the relevant and necessary information; and in any event
(c) acted expeditiously, upon receiving a sufficiently substantiated notice from the rightholders, to disable access to, or to remove from, their websites the
notified works or other subject matter, and made best efforts to prevent their future uploads in accordance with point (b).
Article 17p5 states the following:
In determining whether the service provider has complied with its obligations under paragraph 4, and in light of the principle of proportionality, the following elements, among others, shall be taken into account:
(a) the type, the audience and the size of the service and the type of works or other subject matter uploaded by the users of the service; and
(b) the availability of suitable and effective means and their cost for service providers.
That actually does leave a lot of room for interpretation, and not on the lawmakers' part.. rather, on the implementer's part. Say for example devRant, there's no way in hell that dfox and trogus are going to want to be tasked with upload filters. But they don't have to.
See, the law takes into account due diligence (i.e. they must give a damn), industry standards (so.. don't half-ass it), and cost considerations (so no need to spend a fortune on it). Additionally, asking for permission doesn't need to be much more than coming to an agreement with the rightsholder when they make a claim to their content. It's pretty common on YouTube mixes already, often in the description there's a disclaimer stating something like "I don't own this content. If you want part of it to be removed, get in touch at $email." Which actually seems to work really well.
So say for example, I've had this issue with someone here on devRant who copypasted a work of mine into the cancer pit called joke/meme. I mentioned it to dfox, didn't get removed. So what this law essentially states is that when I made a notice of "this here is my content, I'd like you to remove this", they're obligated to remove it. And due diligence to keep it unavailable.. maybe make a hash of it or whatever to compare against.
It also mentions that there needs to be a source to compare against, which invalidates e.g. GitHub's iBoot argument (there's no source to compare against!). If there's no source to compare against, there's no issue. That includes my work as freebooted by that devRant user. I can't prove my ownership due to me removing the original I posted on Facebook as part of a yearly cleanup.
But yeah.. content providers are responsible as they should be, it's been a huge issue on the likes of Facebook, and really needs to be fixed. Is this a doomsday scenario? After reading the law paper, honestly I don't think it is.
Have a read, I highly recommend it.
http://europarl.europa.eu/doceo/...13 -
Couple of months ago a friend of mine got a new charge in the company as director of software development, he is an awesome person, always helping and trying to hear all opinions, but his wife also works there, she is an absolutely awful person, since the new charge of my friend she feels like the boss trying to control the time of the people, and the ways the things are done in the company, and if you don't agree she warns you about telling to his husband, but my friend just try to calm down the things and get to an agreement in both parts. So I mean, bro you are an excellent boss but you should put limits on your wife, at least in the job.1
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"Why are you sometimes late?"
Because your promised office was always late. Had to commute 2 hours and work for almost 10 hours in weekdays just to sleep for 4 hours.
You said that the new Office will be in August. Now it's October and it's still half-baked.
Learn Empathy first5 -
Client: I want a fixed timescale and cost on this project.
Me: OK, what do you need?
Client: We need to integrate our website with our CRM system, which we're in the middle of rebuilding and don't know what data will be available from it. We also want sophisticated Google maps integration, online sale, digital agreement signing and a customer login section that works as a social network for our clients. And we want it in six months time. And an app. And we want you to pitch for free with some initial design concepts. And we want details of you project management strategy.
Me: Ok... Do you know what you want your app to do?
Client: Yes, it's an app! So how much will this cost me?
Me: D':2 -
Hi DevRanters!
I got this react gig earlier this year, its pay is $280/month ($70/week), its a relatively new startup yet to launch though. i was tasked with building landing page and dashboard for user and admin.
Since the company is about to launch, myself and the ceo had a talk concerning salary and he's proposing a salary lower than the one stated above.
Please for a relatively new startup how much do you think is ideal for salary?
What do I do if we couldn't reach an agreement?
Asking for a friend. Thanks.19 -
A colleague came to me ranting about some feature marketing wants.
"Save whether the user accepted, rejected or ignored the TOS." They have to accept the privacy agreement first, so this feature is most likely about annoying users who rejected the TOS. Totally justified. Fuck that marketing team.8 -
Our approach is to get a loose feel for what the client wants, lift some visuals from Theme Forest then spend the next few weeks persuading the client to use our crappy server rather than their preferred AWS solution. Then once the project is behind schedule we break the work down into disparate tasks each of which gets a single line brief from the PM (such as 'create admin' or 'do css'). These then get assigned to different devs with no consideration of their skillset. The PM is available for 10 mins every day to answer queries, the rest of the time our devs are expected to work autonomously. Meanwhile we'll tell the client that we're back on schedule and arrange a demo for an impossibly short deadline. We have the mantra ”dont worry about it” which the PM uses to quash any dev's concerns up until the day before the deadline at which point we'll swap some devs on to unrelated work whilst others concentrate on getting "just the pages the client wants to see looking right" (we have a policy of making it look like it works before it actually does.) Following the demo we will announce all the missing features we had forgotten about from the initial undocumented agreement and set the project aside whilst we service another client.2
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I might be new to webdev , but wtf is wrong with imports in js ?
html seems to get the only decent way of dealing with js: all the files mentioned in subsequent <script> tags can access the functions of previous file
but when it comes to those generated html content(aka react projects) and servers, nobody seems to come to an agreement : react guys uses import while server people uses require. and both of these can't be used in the same file : import works in mjs files (or usual files too if type is defined as module) while require works in cjs file (or usual js files if type is NOT defined as module)
so i kind of like imports for its elegance and resembelence to java imports. and i might have got into some errors in unrelated areas , so my package.json has type=module . i want to use some cjs package (jsonwebtoken) and that shit for the love of god won't work with import, so i gotta use it with cjs file and then the whole project can't use that crappy cjs file.
WTAF ? has web world not got matured enough to not have this shitty import export situation?should i write caveman code and convert everything to require(..) ?
fuck me6 -
Hey! This is a followup to my last story.
TL;DR: I thinking of quitting my old job, got an offer at a startup, about the same pay, but much better working conditions.
First of all, the meeting with my lead. It was a performance report on her side to me, and I got 100 to 110% in performance in all points. My lead said "this team without you wouldn't be this team anymore" - which makes me feel a little bit bad for her if I decide to quit. She is a great team lead, but I don't belive the old company is worth my time anymore.
Now to the new company. Shortly after that performance report meeting, I had a call with the ceo, and what do I have to say besides: What a cool dude. He listened to me, asked me questions about my previous jobs (not just as programmer) and so on. But because first looks are deceiving, I went to their office last thursday. And wow. Their are exactly what I imagined them to be. Cool, young folks, 100% tech enthusiasts, and open minded.
One of the new hires in the new company wanted a 6 months internship between his studies. Instead they offered him a full time job - for the 6 months. They even offered me to pay back my scholarship that I will own my old company for leaving early. This is awesome.
The only things that will be worse than my old job are, that I have to negotiate payment instead of yearly increases, 4 days less paid vacation, so only 26 days, and 40h weeks. And they have no workers council, which isn't good, but it's not the worst either.
I got them fixed on 57.000€, not including an up to 10.000€ annual bonus. The way you achieve your bonus seems good to. It's split in two parts, internal and external bonus. Internal bonus is when you engage with internal events like tech calls, sharing your knowledge on your main IT topics, etc. External Bonus is a bit more complicated, but also straight forward. You work on projects for customers, and if you have less than 3 weeks a year that you dont participate in an project, you get the full bonus.
Last friday, I filed a request for a certificate of employment from my current team lead, this is odd for her because I have never done it before, and she asked why I requested it. I said to her that we can talk about it, and she agreed but didn't call me, yet.
Lastly, another good friend of mine will be employed by my team soon, but for a fraction of the payment that I currently receive! He is doing the exact same work, and even worse, he is doing project managment for his main developer project too! And is getting less paid... I just cant...
Yesterday we needed to update a few cloud instances, the only other person who knows about setting up CICD and our OpenShift Containers than me is only in part time and works two days a week, his trainee didn't know anything, so it's up to me. This isn't hard or anything, but it shows that this system our mangement maintains will fail soon, maybe even with me going? I sure hope so tbh.
One of you guys said, I should go to my team lead and negotiate a higher pay, but the truth is, that because we are a big ISP we have an collective agreement for payment and are grouped by tasks (which is bull shit btw, because I'm doing tasks much higher paid than currently). This also means that I cannot simply jump in another group, and can only increase my current pay to about 115%, which is done automatically every year by 5% up to 115%. Anything above is considered extra, but I don't think they will go with it.
I will decide this week about my future at the old company, but I really don't know what to do...2 -
I work at a company that sees front end developers as, basically, lab rats. I make less than my coworkers, who are all underpaid, and also turn out more clean code (based on mutual agreement, plus the only person who documents anything) than the rest of the team, and at much higher quantities.
Why? Because I get my ass handed to me by depression and anxiety every morning, and end up coming in ~1 hour late everyday. (For nearly a year now, even with medical intervention)
I'm probably going to be fired for it fairly soon, as well as get swallowed in medical bills.
On the bright side, I finally fixed a bug with my portfolio website that I've been working on, so I've got that going for me which is nice.2 -
I'm not a dev, but I want to be. There's a lot of ways to become a developer from what I can tell, but the one I chose was a coding bootcamp.
I was accepted to Thinkful with an Income Share Agreement and a Living Stipend.
I'll be in the full time Engineering Immersion cohort starting this upcoming February.
So I just wanted to share my small accomplishment. Wish me luck, fam.1 -
This is a warning 😡
A tale first...
I being the kind soul I am offered my help to another web company .. their site was built poorly and took 20 seconds to load I told them the fixes they needed in the hopes they would give me the work to do it that was the agreement after all 😡
Instead they stole my ideas and did them themselves now they have a good website 😡 fully working
Let me be clear if you fuck me over like this. I. Will. End. You.
I hate scum like this ... I'm calling him tomorrow I will give him the benefit of the doubt, if he says something like 🙄 well tough.
There won't be a website the next day... 😡
😈20 -
"New facebook dating service! It's absolutely free! Just sign this user agreement and durable power of attorney. We promise we won't rape you with it later. "
It's a joke now, but probably not for much longer. -
recruiter: "perfect, you seem the kind of guy we're looking for this role. but can you explain this gap in your resume?"
me: "I'm sorry but I've signed an NDA(non-disclosure agreement)"6 -
#noestimates
I fucking hate doing estimates. It stresses me out. I just did it, for a requirement about migration. I'm on my way to a fight now with the PO, because "the estimated time is too long". There was an agreement that deliverables were not to have extensive documentation and unit testing will only cover 30% of each use case (I know, stfu), but that's gone so I have to do the whole thing. I estimated 160 hours coding time, 40% of that for docs and 50 for testing. I'm standing by it.
All that stuff aside, what bothers me the most about estimates is that there's lazy motherfuckers who say shit like "I can have their RESTful ws in 2 days, but I said a month, because fuck it" and generate a win-win situation for them and their company, because the client - practically everytime - will just argue for the task to be completed in barely 10% less of the estimated time, accept the proposal and be happy waiting, the developer will fucking dawdle and the company will be paid for more hours than it deserves. Ugh.
Fuck estimates.2 -
the worst documentation I've dealt with was (sadly) some I wrote myself.
We had a project - build with no maintenance agreement attached. so I half-assed the docs and tests... a year after launch we sign a support agreement and I'm struggling to figure out how the damn thing works! -
Like I know most like to hate on recruiters, and I guess that’s cause may, maybe even most, are just a pain and don’t really understand development nearly well enough to actually target relevant candidates.
I’ve dealt with a few over the years when looking, this is the first time however one has sent a contract that includes a 3 month default clause.
Not sure about other countries but in mine there is a legal 3 month probation period, which really is there in part to allow either party the ability to terminate the agreement at basically a moments notice.
Maybe I don’t like the company or how they work, maybe I lied my arse off during the interview and copied an assessment off the web, or hek they just don’t like me…
It’s a legal period in which pretty much and any reason is a valid reason.
Yet for this recruiter, no matter the reason, if the employment ends during those 3 month, I would then be liable to pay her 10% of my annual gross.
Like NAF…3 -
How hard is it to make a custom steno-lithography API? And do I even need one?
Hi, all. My name is J.A and I am co-owner of 3DPrintedDreams with my best friend. (We are both 17.)
During a brainstorm of what should be the flagship feature of our shop should be. We decided to take user images, (exact specifications TBD), and then use an API to transform them into .stl files so my friend can print it on his 3D Printer.
I am asking how hard or "easy" would it be to make such an API and what would be the bottom dollar if I were to make a collab post here about it? If anyone would be willing to listen, I could explain how all this would work in relation to the full stack of my website.
p.s. I understand that experience costs money and I myself have experienced this, but, we spent most of our money on the Pallete 2 from Mosaic. (about $500).
HOWEVER, we still have some money left. If a suggested price is to much for us to pay up-front, 3DPrintedDreams is willing to pay you in installments dermined by mutual agreement.
Thanks for your time and have a nice day!
-Josh
Co-founder of 3DPrintedDreams, LLC (Pending).15 -
I needed to take today off to prep for a home repair. I didn't have much notice either, but I assumed my manager would be okay with some last minute PTO because of how relaxed everyone usually is around here. Guess that didn't include me.
I should have never assumed that my boss was someone I could think of as a peer. I called their boss "Boss" one time, and they said that they don't look at it that way, and that they see me as a peer. My boss nodded in agreement, but it was all formalities, and I bought right into it. Especially since both of them, even the other guys, take time off on a whim. But I'm somehow tied to a stricter standard, even though I can't beg hard enough to get so much as an email answered for legitimate reasons. They'll jump right on my ass when they feel I'm not working as hard as them, but I get silence most of the rest of the time. Bullshit. It's no wonder the conversation changes when your boss sits down at the lunch table. How depressingly typical.1 -
So I’m in a bit of a pickle.
I’ve become involved with a pretty fast paced group project. We’ve got 9 weeks to write up a mock PDR and all of the communication is done through Discord and teleconferences. As of last week an issue came up where one of the teammates (Black) felt accused by Red of being called authoritative and feels disrespected by the following message: “I don't know if I'm picking up on it correctly, but it feels like you want to control every situation. I feel like you're trying to take on a part of everyone's role so that you also need more people a part of each sub category. I think whatever happened is done whether we did turn it in late or not, I don't think we need to pressure others to do more that is needed. Also, Project Manager's dad passed. Not to make it an excuse, but I think it should be taken into consideration. Also, we didn't even verify all the positions til the meeting we had. So even still, we would have had to turn it in late since there were so many arrangements
If you don't trust your other members to do their job without having to be supervised, it can be counterintuitive to the whole teamwork aspect.” This message was sent after we missed a deadline to submit a team organization chart and Black team member insisted on becoming a third Assistant Project manager while making it seem as the other 2 APM’s were incompetent at their job.
Although I agree that it is difficult to communicate all of your emotions through written messages, I still think that taking your tone into consideration is crucial when working remotely. Am I wrong? Is there a better way to work with this team member? It’s still very early on in the project and this is the first time I’m working on a project with others with very little face to face communication. Typically when similar issues became present in other group projects, we would all sit down and discuss it and try to reach an agreement (or at least an understanding of where everyone is come from). Any advice is seriously appreciated.
13 -
I have had a meeting with "CTO" of pretty big factory. I was suppose to propose a new cloud solution for existing Sharepoint application. Unfortunately we didn't get into any agreement , because the dude only accepts SharePoint solutions and when I started talking about the cloud, he literally went nuts. He later have told me that he has been working here for over 20 years. The technical staff of that factory is just him and some other young guy and they only task they doing is to maintain complex Sharepoint infrastructure. If we hosted application in the cloud, he would lost his job.1
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Had this client for which I did some work on agreement. The agreement was fairly well laid out and the work was well defined. We delivered on time and he was all good. Move forward a couple months and this guy comes back asking for changes, upon which I said we'd need a new agreement because the last one expired when the job ended, but he didn't want a new agreement and to not make a point of it we didn't. We made the changes and I invoiced him, as we do, and then he starts accusing me of trying to rip him off and calls me a child. Stopped working with him after that3
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Someone once forced my team to make something live on a Friday, that wasn't ready and wasn't tested properly. I said no and had to go pick up the kids from school. Found out later they made one my team stay late to finish it and push it live, even though I told everyone to leave on time.
Lots of meetings the week after where I got told off for standing up for my principles. Eventually reached an agreement.
At least some common ground was found and changes were no longer pushed before the weekend. -
We have a web application that will be deployed to the client premises. Part of the agreement is that the full source code will be provided. Now my manager asked me to hide/restrict the usage of a certain feature, and should not be hackable even if we give the full source code. Gosh help me guys, I don't know what I'm doing here.3
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> Rental agreement ending this summer
> Sign up for apartment in rent controlled country with 10+ years in queue
> Be told I might have to relocate anyway because dropped clients
> Say yes, that'd be cool
> Apply for apartments in new location
> Get offered one in this city
> Get offered one in other city
> Have <1 week to sign
> Declining would mean no first hand contract ever in that city
> Contact boss man to know where I can work
> On vacation until end of June
Nnnnnnnggggggghhhhhhhhhh -
Oh Lord give me the strength and the brainpower to step a way from freelancing or at least overcome the humongous pile of shite tied to the aforementioned barely lucrative activity.
AMEN !!
Recently got a client. We had an agreement on requirements, deadlines and on pricing. It's a job that can be done in a week if all the resources are at hand.
He reaches back a couple of days later and says :
Him: Listen I am on an intermediate...
Me: Mmhmm.
Him: I had a talk with the actual owner and he can only pay you in June.
Me: I see, but that I can't do. That means if the website is live by the 15th I'll have to wait for 2 weeks at least before getting paid.
You'll have to come up with something that makes more sense.
fml.7 -
A few months back, I had this interview with this guy to work at his startup. It was wonderful and he told me that I am hired (during the interview itself!). The position was of an intern as I was to start my co-op. So, to complete all the process with the university, I need offer letter to submit. The guy did not send me one, instead he sent an NDA. I emailed him explaining that I need an offer letter to submit to the university first before I sign any agreement. He stopped replying to my emails.
I had no other option so I contacted my university's co-op committee and explained them the situation. They contacted that guy and after that I get an email saying "We would like to move forward with other candidates".
IF YOU DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH REVENUE TO PAY, DO NOT CONDUCT INTERVIEWS. AND WHY THE FUCK DID YOU SAY "YOU ARE HIRED IN THE FIRST PLACE?!" MORON1 -
So... being backend and DevOps was not enough. I am supposed alone to walk through PCI DSS compliance now.
https://pcisecuritystandards.org/do...
Undoubtedly fun, but a bit too much for one dev to do everything. But, no choice is left, so let's have the new hat of security on!
6 -
I was asked to integrate a piece of industrial software which was pre-alpha in a prod to align with corporate objectives. It would have caused all kinds of production problems and instability. Nobody would even notice that it wasn’t there. I procrastinated for eight months until version 1 was released.
I told my manager it was done. Then he informed me that it had been working the whole time and he got plenty of positive feedback so i should roll back to the old version until we can do a planned upgrade. I nodded in agreement and put off the downgrade. -
I worked with a client, last year, over an app that I didn't think much of, and kept making YouTube videos after our contract ended. Two months ago, I got an idea of making an app for my channel and posted a roadmap video on it.
The client saw that video today, and sent me an email with legal threats, saying I can't do that according to our employment agreement. So, I deleted the videos. All good, no hard feelings. Good ol' Capitalism baby!
But then, I started overthinking about it and it made sense why most high level devs don't post tutorial content anymore and they make videos like "Day In the Life" or "Reality of programming" blah blah.
Maybe they're afraid too that they will get their channel terminated or their life would go to waste?4 -
I haven't been ranting in a while but y'all are so smart that I can't get enough of your wisdom!
So... Client wants me to build something. That something has a lot of commercial value as a product or even a startup...
How do I go about communicating that? Do I reach an agreement to release it open-source and then I can offer commercial support? Do I offer them a discounted price for my services and I remain the owner of the code?
Thanks! 😊1 -
I was not aware we're issuing visas to Aliens. But I'm not surprised they are green.
ref.: https://docs.linuxfoundation.org/tc...
7 -
TL;DR Does Telegram really secure?
Some people say Telegram is the most secure and safe messenger, some say it's not. If you're familiar with it you may know from news that Telegram did not gave its clients' info to government, you may have heard that Telegram's encryption is not the best one, BUT my question is does it store peoples' private chats' keys? Actually it does with normal chats because if you reinstall Telegram you can easily get normal chats' messages. Also my friend said that any application in mobile stores like App Store sign a agreement with stores owner company that if some points met, the application owner have to share info of its clients. So dear friend what do you think, should I continue using Telegram)?
P.S. sorry for my not the best English5 -
Been consulting a friendly acquaintance on technical issues for some time now. An interesting side project in a field that I am not familiar. Well after some time you begin to be well versed and understand what it's all about.
Wrote some code. Made a website. Did some soldering and prototyping. Now I find myself in a position where most of the IP is a) written by me b) designed by me.
An official agreement has been a topic couple of times. The owner wants to hire me, but I don't see myself working there. He offered shares. I said yes. But nothing has been formalized.
Now the the CEO sends me an NDA that practically tries to make me sign over all the IP to the company. First correspondence I get from him since the beginning. Legislation is quite clear. Without written agreement IP is owned by the creator.
I lolled. They must think I am dumb because I try to help. I feel a hefty invoice for services provided generating in my accounting.. -
And that, folks, is why you never do a rush job, no matter how urgent, without an RFP and answering estimate followed by a signed statement of work confirming agreement to the estimate. Even with a prearranged, perpetual contracting agreement. And also why you NEVER deliver the end product without payment. No matter how much you trust your client or believe they will do right by you, process still matters.2
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Note: I have deleted my previous version of this question as I found it lacking crucial information and therefore being prone to misunderstandings.
Question : In C/C++ you can position the keyword 'const' either left or right of the left-most type specifier. Which variant do you prefer?
I ask that because I'd like to hear your opinion. Although I have been working with C over three decades now, I only learned this a couple of years ago. After some experimentation I decided for myself, that I like the placement to the right more. Although the positioning to the left is taught in literally every book and course, the original placement suits me better.
One reason, of many, is the listing of many member variables in structs or classes. To have them nicely aligned, I always had to put 'const' either on the previous line or put in extra indention to everything non-const. That was quite irritating sometimes.
Another, and my main reason is, that when reading from right to left, the rhs variant just makes more sense than the lhs variant. Reading from left to right almost never makes much sense without straining your eyes. But that is, of course, highly subjective.
This is even more so if you have pointers. The 'const' keyword modifies the type identifier(s) to the left. So if the 'const' is (anywhere) left of the '*', the data is const. If the 'const' is right of the '*', the pointer address itself is const. The same applies to references.
Examples, read right-to-left:
int* const i; // i is a const pointer to int data
int const* i; // i is a pointer to const int data
int const* const obj; // i is a const pointer to const int data
The "classical" or "taught" way, that is found almost everywhere would read, still right-to-left:
int* const i; // i is a const pointer to int data
const int* i; // i is a pointer to int data const
const int* const obj; // i is a const pointer to int data const
Not only that the second "lhs" form reads worse, it also looks worse. In my opinion, the first "rhs" variant makes it simpler to quickly determine that we are dealing with three ints, while on the second "lhs" variant, one has to first get past the 'const' keywords.
I know that this is not only a matter of taste, but of course of agreement, too. You can not just go and switch the 'const' placement in long standing projects. That would surely piss of a lot of people. Or even cost you your job.
But I like to know what you people think and why.
Thanks a lot in advance!5 -
Compliance trainings.
All that mandatory bullshit, where they're trying to take the most boring thing ever (ie policies), and gamify it, throw shitload of multimedia on it, make it interactive and think anybody is going to care.
I don't want to watch your fucking videos where employees are trying to enact policy violations.
I'm not going to follow the policies and cooperate with HR as they're not to be trusted in a first place.
Where the hell is the "skip bullshit" button, which takes me to the end of the training, where I click the "I Acknowledge" button, because agreement/liability confirmation is the only thing they're after anyway.2 -
Being on devrant has made me realise just how different peoples opinions/preferences are! Someone rants about one thing and then the comments are either defense, agreement, or "you're both wrong, this is why" 😂😂2
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"90's kids are impatient developers and change job too often" is a phrase I hear often from other managers... The thing I always tell is, generations will clash and yea, we grew up wanting to work in awesome places developed by the marketers mind. How can we reach a better agreement? I have no idea!
Just want to wish you all a merry Xmas and keep on ranting!!8 -
Spent 4 hours playing the role of a designer and crafted some great UI and showed my fellow Dev's and we were all in agreement to implement.Eight hours later our lead designer crafts a totally new look that my boss is so into forcing us to redo the app
Lesson learnt keep your lane1 -
I started this one project as hobby, later on becomes we and we search for client. He assisted upto 30% only ui design. Now I am working 18,19 hours just to complete 2 project simultaneously. horrible experience taught me make sure you make written agreement before working as pair or partner
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I FUCKING HATE PEOPLE! DESPISE EVERY DAMNED CELL THAT MAKES THEM HOMO MOTHERFUCKING SAPIENS. EACH AND EVERY ONE OF THEM! EVEN THOSE THAT HAVE USABLE BRAINCELLS FALL INTO ABBYS OF COMPLETE VOID WITHIN ENDLESS AMOUNTS OF COMPLETE, RETARDED IDIOTS. HOW HARD CAN IT BE TO VERBALIZE A SIMPLE YET COHERENT THOUGHT! IS IT SO HARD TO KNOW WHAT IN THE HELL YOU WANT AND IS IT SO FUCKING HARD TO REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID! DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND WHAT DOES COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY AMOUNT OF WORDS COMING FROM YOUR DISGUSTING MOUTH IS SUPPOSED TO MEAN?! CAN THAT CRIPPLED BRAINCELL OF YOUR GRASP A SIMPLE CONCEPT OF AGREEMENT?!4
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When the client demands all kinds of new features but has no hours left on their service level agreement and doesn't want to increase capacity...1
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Fuck external stake holders, like politicians, those know-nothings, that pump their ego by finding multiple "issues" with our software like how we display the privacy data agreement and impose their stupid fucking nonsense rules on our software. Even if it is not part in any official law or GDPR
So there is the request that one needs to scroll down the whole data privacy crap nobody reads until you can press "Continue" and we *have* to implement that shit. Although it is completely out of line with Apple's usual installer handling. Nobody will understand it. It cripples the workflow.
But some Mr. Important demanded it, as if he is protecting users with this and makes a great contribution to the data privacy in our country. Yeah! And guy is so high up, unreachable for us through all the layers of other people, leaving us no time and means to dissuade this shitty request. If all your 'ideas' are so great you should not be allowed to do jack shit.1 -
When a company makes changes to their Privacy Policy, they just have to provide the diff of the agreement.
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So I opened devRant to find the new *bling* expressions feature added to the avatars.
So I set my expression to happy because nowadays, for some reason, even though work has been tough, I've liked it. And things have been good. Mostly because my lead is on holiday and the acting lead is a hundred times better than him in all aspects (micro management and as a Dev).
Cut to the evening when I'm walking home, the lead calls me up to inform me on a production bug that had to be taken up (acting lead had already asked me to look into it, we had an agreement). And I *HATE* the way he assigns tasks and acts like I'm a wee baby who can't even find his mother's tit.
Anyhoo, ended up changing my avatar expression to majorly fucking frustrated because of the Damn phone call.
So kudos to @dfox and @trogus to adding these little features which make people a bit more expressive! -
There was a department. Long time ago their work was somewhat complicated: background checks of businesses, websites, ToSes, assuring agreement compliance, some risk management on top. They started as small 3 people team but over the years they were hiring new employees to catch up with the growing customer base. They were still struggling. Few years back we've integrated 3rd party services to help them and, finally, their backlog was gone!
In January they complained about how much more work they have since the merger so I inquired about which process was troublesome, what was the flow, etc., and it turned out to be very... Tinder-like - the issue was the sheer number of cases:
1. open a case,
2. check results in few windows,
3. if green + green + green, move right.
4. else move left.
It was ridiculous, I wouldn't stand for that. I sat for an hour, made some ghosting scripts that followed same business logic and saved results alongside their actual decisions. Last week I compared the two and there was zero difference so I green-lit it with my boss and pushed to prod.
Oh, the happiness on their faces when they heard the news, the disbelief, the tears of joy!
And then it happened. After 4 years of being cautious not to stir the waters I did it again. Yesterday I accidentally replaced 17 people department with 3 scripts. How was I supposed to know it was *all* they were doing??1 -
!Dev
I'm looking to rent apartment and I'm baffled by this very weird potential scam.
The landlady wants me to pay the security deposit and the first month's rent using a recharge coupon of a prepaid cash card called Transcash. This is in France btw. But she tells me that she shall provide me the agreement and key on the spot of transfer of the coupon. She also asked me to click a picture of the coupon and send it to her when I buy it as a proof that I'm genuinely interested in renting the place and her trip (she claims to live in another city) will not be in vain. Looks clean but my instincts are screaming that this is a scam. But the only scenario I can think of is them beating me up and stealing the coupons from me instead of giving me the agreement and keys. If it is a scam, I really want to know how they plan to execute it.8 -
One manager at the Client company tells us that unless we submit weekly timesheets we wont get paid.
We are not their employees, nor do we have an agreement with them for full time work.
" Whole thought process is to structure the engagement better ,so that we can implement better governance and provide better visibility."
Anyone understand what is being said above? Jargon.2 -
When signing and completing the contract for a freelance gig requires much more effort then the actual work/code involved. Sorry I mean “independent contractor agreement”. 🙈
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So yesterday there was a discussion at my company about what would be more user friendly for deleting an item or items from a list. Long Press or swipe. We came to an agreement that depends on the UX and choice. What do you think?6
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If someone shares your idea after signing a NDA (nondisclosure agreement), and you sue, how much could you get? Thousands? Millions?2
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Would you delete whatsapp after new agreement?
I didn't yet deleted it, because I don't do big shit in it.8 -
So it's a little bit annoying when your team cant follow simple rules and conventions to enhance the work, I mean, in a reunion we discuss what will be our coding conventions and have and agreement, but now nobody follows it and Ive to keep writing and pushing them to follow rules they created. The best thing is the leader agrees with him saying "we don't have time for following code conventions" but when the code has no comments, no docs at all, the names are absolutely unpredictable and stupid bugs start happening he calls a meeting "to discuss our problems" I mean, for good, the last time we did the same thing
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Close to delivering a project on time. Nothing spectacular or particularly big. But it's been my baby and I could introduce other devs to the codebase without having any "negative" feedback on the design; only minor improvements that made total sense.
We've had one technical disagreement where I very unjustly had to pick my suggested solution. The discussion didn't lead to an agreement and we couldn't stay blocked. Old me would have chosen the design that did not (in my not-so-humble opinion) make any sense, just not to step on any toes. Probably imagined toes and steps and whathaveyous as well.
We're making good progress. We're learning from each other. I like this.
This team lead thing is very temporary, but I haven't grown this much in ages. It's just a regular old job where I help someone else get rich, but it's a great tool for self development. I guess I could be spending my time worse... huh, I like the sound of that. -
Forums are some of the hardest shits you will run away from when trying to delete your account. The complex nesting of threads algorithm makes it hard for you to escape. Some don't allow deleting of accounts and u didn't know that cause you didn't read terms of agreement.
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RIP Good Friday Agreement, the peace and prosperity was great 👍 Boris Johnson will be the prime minister to destroy the union9
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Hi So I need some solid advice from you all wonderful people.
I think i am now ready to look into job side of this world, but have lots of doubts , read my story.
I have been learning android for last 2 years. Most of the time i have been trying to understand how stuff works in android , but i have also gained a few other skills ( python programming, kotlin/flutter basics data analysis basics, testing, some graphic designing, aweful web dev ,etc). But i really want to work with Android. I don't have any specific Salary figure in mind, but i guess my knowledge is better or atleast par with most of the good android developers.
So i want to know how is this fresher/placement thingy work?
1.) GETTING KNOWN? : How can i make some good android based company aware that I am available for hiring? Should i start emailing every android related company that i know of? Should i start listing my profile on recruitment sites like linkedin or internshala? This year it is being said that companies will come for placements. From the status of my college, they are going to give me way to less $ , nd i know am not going to like any of them, but i guess i have to sit for them too.
2.INTERVIEW OR DIRECT PLACEMENTS? A little pre-context: i am currently starting my 4th year in clg. Afaik , 4th year isnt that strict and their can be leniency in terms of attendance. But my college is a place full of political cun*s in the name of directors and HODs and I don't know if they are again going to enforce the old 75% mandatory criteria. Plus if the company is from a different state/country , then my attendance would definitely not suffice.
So mainly i am unsure if somehow a company hires me, i would be able to start immediately. I heard that there are interviews for job recruitment after which the candidate is binded with an agreement to do some months training followed by permanent working after college completion.
This type of agreement is very much suitable for me, since from what my friend tells me, trainings can be lenient and understanding regarding exam preparations nd stuff.
So what do company usually chooses? Binding a fresher on immediate working basis or do they consider graduate completion?
Also, i suck at competitive coding. Do i need to polish myself on that or some company is willing to give me chance on the basis of my other skills 🙈(okay, no kidding , that's a serious question. I need to either work on getting better in competitive or build more apps based on that)
3.) ANDROID OR EVERYTHING? From what i have heard, working as a professional fresher is more like being an allrounder than being a domain specialist. But as i already stated, i really dig android and that's no small framework. I may di other stuff too, but won't interest me nd my output might be less efficient than expected.
So freshers can really be asked to do any stuff? Or can i still be in the area i like being into?
4.) COMPANY OR START-UP? Yeah, this is a general debate starter. Ignoring the business side of the conversation ( job safety vs more salary, experience, etc) the thing that's most important for me is the presence of a team. I want someone to assign me a task, whose vision i could follow, from whom i could learn, and some other people who are supportive and doing the same amount / similar work that am doing . This is so much import8 for me that i can easily ignore other factors for a better team. I once took a call from a startup ceo who hired me, a 2 month old android beginner at that time, as the "lead android developer"
But if am being on a team where i am supposed to do any random stuff that is assigned, then obviously this whole point of "visionary, helpful leader, guiding team, "etc goes moot9 -
Hey guys,
I need some help with reviewing a service agreement contract from a french startup where I am the service provider/freelancer living in my own country in Europe where they will open an office. Ideally a french person who knows about freelancing contracts in France.1 -
Having a dilemma... I need help with my gaming projects. I know a guy who I could train since he has lots of potential but Im having trust issues. Its because I invested around 10k into my codebase and Im afraid to give access to that guy since I suspect that he might use files and some day run away to make his own project. So im back to square 1 again which is loosing my mind with this huge workload. What should I do? Should I just say fuck it ant make him sign some air tight NDA agreement? Even then he could stand up and leave 2 months in and open a competitor project if he doesnt like my management style...3
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i am so fucking conflicted right now. seeing my fiture getting ruined in front of my present eyes. Life always gives me a chance to jump out of a ship that's about to fucking blow , i took it the first time, but this time i missed it for bravery ( and stupidity), and now am sinking alongside this fucking ship
my first job was amazing. decent work, sometimes a lot and sometimes too less. i would learn new things ,interact with people, handle a lot of fuckups . at one point i felt like looking for another opportunity , got one giving 50% hike , so i jumped the ship and sent a resignation letter. the noitice peripd was less, so i enjoyed my days applying to other ships. got even a better offer with 100% hike, so from one boat to another to now a literal cruise.
later i got to know that my original company got bankrupt and fired 85% staff. the next month the company that gave me the first offer layed off 30% staff.
now the waters are tough and my cruise is also getting impacted. but instead of firing, they are asking us to come to the office permanently. their office is in a fucked up place: you need 8$ just to breath the fucking air there. its the city of blood and money. and you will be giving away both things there.
my brain got split into 2 parts after this announcement: my stupid self was still considering this while my sensible self started applying for jobs. my stupid self was thinking that this is a great opportunity to leave my fucking nest of a home , where i am liv8ng woth my parents for last 25 years, and learn to live alone. clean utensils, cook food , wash clothes... i wanted to live the life the harsh way.
but life still took a pity on the fool that j am and gave me an opportunity. an opportunity to work with a big brand who hasn't done any layoffs in their 40+ yrs of existence (but also known for giving shit increments)
the offer was just a 40% hike but it was near my home. i could be in office in 1 hr in less than a dollar a day and still earn more than what am earning now.
plus my notice period is now 60 days , so who knows what other offer i could have got in those 60 days ( when i would keep my profile with a big green "immediately available to hire" circle on me.
however this time i didn't jump the boat. i asked them for a bigger raisez they declined and my stupid self was more than happy.
now the company has started to send mails regarding relocation and yepp the cruise is sinking , atleast for me. if i was savingsx in this company, my savings would become x/8 if i go to that city. in the new offer it would have at worst remained x.
and that's not even half of what's bothering me. i had accepted the money loss in exchange of what that city and my company had to offer : a chance to experience WFO, a chance to live life like a mature man and not a kid in his mom's house ,and a life full of hurdles and strangers.
however i always like to keep an emergency fallback mechanism on me , for if things don't work out. I don't wanna go depressed and cut my wrists there, I don't want people to hurt me so much that I can't recover. i want to run away from that wreched city the moment i start to loose the battles there and the city starts taking over me.
but what the holy fuck? my company's notice period is 60 days, and my rented room's security deposit is 6 fucking months? i will be giving 6 months of deposit + 1 month of brokerage + 1month of rent on the first day i put my steps on that wretched land after travelling in a 100 dollar flight! where am i supposed to get this much money?!
and okay, somehow i manage this. say i did an 11 months agreement, paid the fucking 8 months of rent at one go and simply started living a shitty life there. in month 2 i break down and wanted to implement my escape mechanism. it would go like this : i will suck up and try to live for rent free for next 6 months. but wait, THAT'S NOT FUCKING ALLOWED!! iam supposed to get my security AFTER 11+1 MONTHS!! why not freaking adjust it in my rent?
I can't think straight . 6 months of security deposit has blown my brain. i am regretting anything and everything. I can't think of my roommates situation, home safety, room location, whatever the fucks we think while looking for a room . all i can think is ...WHY SO MUCH MONEY NEEDS TO GO AT ONCE!?
FUCK1
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