Programming in a tree. I usually climb up here and read, but I decided to code, and I didn't drop my laptop :D

I covered the screen with my hand because my code's ugly, and I don't want anyone to see it lol.

"Is that a script or a hand job?"

A friend's colleague (who's pretty bad at English) that refers to manually typing in to the console as "a hand job".

These "learn {language} in {x} minutes" tutorials are getting out of hand

With a sock in his hand he said: "Giulio is a free elf."

I believe that devRant needs to have a scheduling feature that you can set your work time in it, so when your hand unconsciously opens devRant in that time, this activity pops up:

Interviewing a candidate for a dev position.

Interview is over and handshakes commence.

After the interview we have a debrief in a room that has hand sanitizer in it (just coincidence).

I squirt some and it comes out like a rocket ship; getting all over one of his resumes we printed. It looks like jizz...

One of the head guys walks in a says:

“I hope he didn’t hand you the resume like that.”

To which one of our ops people, let’s call her Sara, says...

“No, leanrob just REALLY likes his resume!!!”

> I almost fucking died from laughter

Manager: You really shouldn’t be doing that

Dev: It’s in my job description

Manager: Yeah but you still shouldn’t be doing it.

Dev: Who should I hand it off to?

Manager: We don’t have anyone else to hand off that task to.

Dev: Ok, do I stop doing it?

Manager: 😡 Of course not, it needs to get done! I’m just saying you shouldn’t do it.

Dev: ???????????

A friend bought a new expensive mouse.

I made the mistake of asking how it feels in his hand.

His response was "Heavenly. Like cupping an angel's ballsack".

StackOverflow: let's marginalize your "problem" and focus on the real issue at hand, which is that line 4 doesn't conform to the language standards and thus will lead to undefined behavior on a single kind of 8-bit microcontroller made in 1984 that is no longer in use.

Had an interest in IT security some time ago, so I downloaded some tools to experiment a little and research to get some first hand experience since a lot of the course material we have at work is too vague....

Guess who got a visit from the police 👮
😡

For those who were wondering, since my last post had some people who seemed interested, here's my progress on my 8-bit computer. I've got the clock on the left hand side, and the 2 8-bit registers on the right hand sign. (The power strips in the middle are going to be used as a bus)

Fucking fuck.
Females in QA always use a hand lotion or a creme, so every damn door handle and every test device is constantly oily and moist.

I've told them multiple times that it needs to stop but they only told me I was pathetic (maybe I am), now finally few others also started noticing that any phone in their hand slips away every time.

Even after using a restroom and grabbing the doorknob of our office I need to go back, wash my hands again and then open the door with a napkin.

I hate dirty things and ignorant coworkers who don't give a fuck about others. I'll start wearing gloves probably.

Is "sleep-coding" a thing? Fell asleep last night on accident with my phone in my hand. When I woke up, I had typed a few lines of code in my sleep.

I have the habit of immediately closing parentheses after opening them, then insert the code.

The problem is, this applies to hand writing as well. Because you cannot move characters in a hand written exam I spend half of the time writing, then removing parentheses.
Whyyy brain

Bought a second hand coffee machine and went to get it by bike.

Put it in the back and drove home. It fell off somehow like a hundred meters before arriving home and its leaking now.

😭😞

its amazing how far technology has come. I can edit a hi-res image in real time with a computer smaller than my hand.

student in an exam

Q: what don't you eat for lunch?

stud Ans: dinner and breakfast.

Q: how do you lift an elephant with one hand?

stud ans: there is no elephant with one hand.

In a career talk about the importance of the IT industry:
Speaker: "Who here uses AWS?"
*I'm the only one who raised my hand in a hall of ~100 IT students*
Speaker: "Good, you are a geek that everyone should aim to be!"
Ummmm… Is that a compliment…? Why do I feel a bit offended…

Hello! I am Johnny Knoxville and tonight on Jackass...we test in prod with no back out plan in place...and then I will glue Bam's hand to his dick while he's sleeping.

My GF said I look so silent and innocent while working. She has no idea how much I curse the monitor in my head while working.

No one is going to hold your hand in the real world.

Now go on and fuck up some more so you can learn more.

Me: *Has 3 difficult exams to study for and hours of work*

Also me: I should try my hand at encryption in Python.

(I'm using Sennheiser bluetooth headphones)

Me: What device is that music coming from?
*checks desktop, nope*
*checks laptop, also nope*
*checks for phone, can't find phone*
*checks living room*
*checks bedroom*
*notices phone is in hand with google play music open*

Wireless headphones are weird.

So I've developed a nice looking website for a client after designs were approved and what not. After seeing it in the flesh, the the client is now trying her hand at redesigning it herself in WORD. I am so done.

!rant

I managed to do a chunk of programming in class today without my partner to hold my hand through it. It may be simple, but I am proud of it nonetheless.

The moments when you grow the most as a person are those where you have a big axe in your hand, ready to shout through the office WHICH OF YOU LOWLY SPERMSLURPING JERKS FORGOT TO WRITE A FUCKING TEST FOR THIS METHOD

...only to see your own name appear in git blame.

What do you do when you buy a second hand netbook and want to play with it in your way home but the internet is veeery bad?

You play Tetris on the terminal! \o/

When you build a beautiful set of Sass files with grunt/gulp tasks, hand it off to another developer who makes all their changes in the compiled css.

Reason #387 I wish I worked from home:

Some dude at this office needs to be banned from toilets. I'm pretty sure he craps in his hand then tries to swat it into the bowl with a slotted spoon.

Saw an if statement like this in a hand me down company project:
If(!x && !Y && !Z && (A || (!B && C)))

After the face reveal and the hand reveal... Let's do something spicier! 😉

Guys, post a pic of your "private member"...
Gals, post a pic of your "closure"... If you know what I mean 😏

Mine's in the comments

!rant OMG GOOD NEWS!!!!!!!! I only have tendinitis in my elbow causing pain in my hand, not carpal tunnel or arthritis 😄

Today in algebra I got bored and wrote "<hand>" on the back of my hand and "</hand>" on the top of my wrist, I feel proud of myself and I also question why I do things like this.

Hahaha

Where do I hand in my letter of resignation

"Whenever a user creates their account, they get an email with their password. We also get a copy of said email which makes it easy to troubleshoot any issues when they ring us." -- I was so tempted to hand in my resignation on the spot...

Fell asleep with my hand on the keyboard and woke up a few hours later. There was many thousands of newlines in my code.

Got my new (second hand) game pad to run on Linux in just one minute!

Every time I have to deal with my boss code and lack of convention and everything that makes a clean code I just want to scream like a bitch and punch him in the face without minding breaking my own hand.

Whoever brought this keyboard up a month or so ago...you forced my hand. I needed one...and now I am $160 poorer :/

But it is beautiful and Cherry MX Clear switches are amazing.

I named it after my favorite weapon in PSO "Last Survivor".

I was just looking for my phone whilst it was in my hand 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

I've decided to tattoo "RTFM" across the knuckles on my right hand. One day I'm gonna snap and instead saying it, I'm gonna punch someone in the face and they should know why.

That wonderful moment when after months of applying and interviewing you finally get to hand in your resignation..! 🎉

Best joke of the day is always reality. Im working in one of the richest companies in the world.
The spare part stock is tracked on an excell sheet and changes in stock filled by hand on paper.

So I'm trying my hand at home brewing beer. I started my first batch 2 weeks ago, and finally bottled it last night. It should be ready in another 2 weeks! I can't wait to try it; it smells delicious 🍺

Schrodinger's USB:
you have the USB in your hand. you don't know if you have it in the upright position or not. you can only find out if you've got it right when you try it!... otherwise the you're holding it both wrong; and right!

My graduation cap. Just got my degree in CS. As I shook the hand of the Dean of the college, he said "love the cap"
:D

In this company master branch is abused more than the hand brake in fast and furious

OCD and multiple developers on a project never go hand in hand

Teacher:"You have two years before you have to hand in your coursework and final coding project"
Me:"Yes plenty of time I got this"
1 week before final deadline
Me:"WTF have I not done anything"

Me: We should organize our code before it gets out of hand.

Team: Maybe later

Team, 4 days later: WTF why can’t I find anything in this 1000+ line main.js file???

What happens if you break your hand/arm/wrist and it requires an arm sling (picture attached)? Can you still work or what? I'm assuming it varies from company to company or something. Do you have anything in place for preparation for this event?

Refactored and upgraded a web app from 2013 in a week. Long days and nights of changing horrible jquery selectors I'd written when I was new to coding into nice a nice MVVM structure. Finally shutting down my laptop, beer in hand and sat out in the sunshine.

Only people reading this will know the feeling of relief I am feeling now!

IntelliCode is super cool.

On the other hand, in the future….

meet the new PM
go to shake his hand
he throws a "fist bump"
i change to "first bump"
he changes to hand shake...
can already tell that we will not see eye to eye in many things...

Need my vaccine receipt to go to a wedding. And I’m in line to get the pdf document. On the one hand this is some cool implementation for a load balancer, on the other hand this so strange… be online in a line to get a document -.0

My boss and one of my coworkers “touch me”...

I’m usually one of the first ones in the office. When my coworker comes in and walks by, he touches my shoulder from the back in a “hello friend” kinda way.

Especially when I’m trying to ignore him he pokes my shoulder. He could you’d waved his hand in front of my head.

My boss is trying to be the “buddy” I guess. When having lunch and someone says something funny, he literally rests his hand on my shoulder or kinda rams my shoulder with his shoulder..

They think that’s nice and “bonding” but I hate it and it makes me very very uncomfortable. The ONLY ones who are allowed to touch me are my GF (I don’t have one) and other girls i know in a night out after a few drinks.

Not even my best friends touch me cause they know I don’t like that.

Im giving obvious signs that they should stop but they don’t get it..

On the other hand I probably have some serious problems that It makes me that uncomfortable in the first place, but not sure how to fix that.. i don’t even go to the barber shop because they have to touch me to cut my hair. So I cut them myself or my dad does it once in a year.

Leader: Meeting starts in 10 mins, we have to show this to the boss
*Team member breaks database silently
*I notice the API has stopped working
Leader: Anyone , anything you want to tell me before the meeting.
*I raise my hand
Me: Yep, the API is not working :)
*Everybody ... FACEPALM

I ordered a second hand mini laptop. (Mini as in 8 inch)

Now I obviously will put some kind of Linux distro onto it but I'm wondering which one I should choose.

Debian based is a must, except for that I don't know yet.

Ideas?

The moment I switched to root user in the production server my hand was just itching to type rm -rf.

Must resist the urge!

Staying up late night and sacrifice on sleep to complete the task at hand. A good night's sleep will result in good quality code.

ESET Antivirus is a strange animal. On one hand, it seems reasonably well written, because unlike Norton or F-Secure, it doesn't subject your computer to death by constant disk access and 100% CPU load for 10 minutes when you start it.

On the other hand, when I clicked the link in the mail about renewing licenses and filled out the form, I was not redirected to a page where I could enter credit cart details.

Instead, I got message that some representative would get back to me in 1-2 work days. Eh, what? It's a digital product for f***'s sake. Now, I suppose they'll send me a hand written letter (written using a quill, no doubt), delivered by a bloke riding a horse and wearing a tricorn.

Well, at least ESET virus definition updates are pushed on the internet, and not sent out on 5.25" diskettes.

When a co working waves his hand at you every 5 minutes to get your attention and you have your headphones in and try to not see the waves because you know it's just going to be you coding his function for them

Every sacrifice you make for your job will be forgotten in a minute and won’t be rewarded unless you force their hand.

Luckily, I outsourced this experience and have never made sacrifices.

When I had to submit an enhancement to the customer and so I pulled an all nighter in my office. I knew before hand that the office would be empty post 11 pm, so I sneaked in 4 cans of beer and coded the night away while downing chilled beer.
That was a good night. :)

When you're in your mid-twenties and get the first few wrist aches on your mouse hand and get anxious about possible carpal tunnel syndrome... I can't be the only one.

!rant

Lovely and thankful clients do exist!

Last week the client of our last project came to my desk to shake my hand and thank me for my well done work. Keeping in mind that I'm a junior dev and our company has around 3000 employees I was really flattered :)

Do not wave you phone around during a video interview. Don't turn it upside down. Don't put keep your hand near it -- I am not interested in your finger nails. Don't pace around. Don't look like a YouTuber that has no idea what they are doing on a video conference.

That is all.

I worked at a company that had timers on the lights. If you were in a stall for 10 minutes it would go pitch black. You either had to hope someone was coming in to pee soon or open the stall and wave your hand hoping the motion detector would see it, and hope no one was about to walk in. Keep your Kingdom Rush games short.

Programming and listening to music go hand in hand a lot of times...

i went to my college bakery and i bought a sandwich (costs 140) and ultra energy drink (costs 90) in my currency

i extend my hand with money and the woman takes a calculator and types with one finger 1 4 0 + 9 0 = and says "230"

I can't wait until I hand in my resignation to become a pen tester, I'm interviewing next week! I'm done with development. Don't really have any message here, but felt like sharing it regardless.

"The sharpness of the sword is not in the edge of the blade, but in the hand of the warrior." - Martin Aquino

Being woken up in the afternoon by a client phone call, mouse in hand and a long line of spaces in your code. The benefits of self employment.

How many bones are in the human hand? A handful of them.

Frontend and backend do not go hand in hand always

Call me crazy but honestly, getting a segmentation fault in C/C++ makes my day joyful

Java or Python guys will never understand the feel you get when you end up getting segmentation fault in C/C++

Sitting in midst of nature with beer in hand and segmentation fault on screen.

WOW :) THAT'S WHAT WE CALL LIFE :)

PS: Although sometimes it's frustrating as hell

So it’s my girlfriend’s birthday and I was sitting with wine in my hand and C sharp.

I’m gonna be dead tomorrow.

The coffee here is so shitty, I have to drink lots of water to get rid of the terrible flavor that remains in my mouth every single time.

On the other hand, I'm very well hydrated.

My former housemates had a cat, they moved out and took said cat. Cat had fleas which I wasn't informed of.

Cleaning out the now vacant room with a can of flea spray in hand I utter:

"Now, my uninvited friends, sooner or later, even if I have to do it individually, by hand at times, I will find you all and I will squash you for I am a software developer and I deal with bugs all the time."

"Hmm, I have one hour left to hand-in my complete program via Moodle. I can still do something.
Let's implement a cheat when a user types 12oatmeal at the menu."

Just got to work and we have no power. Maybe hand writing code in university will finally come in handy. Lol not. :)

Heard sales manager talking to his team to wash their hands properly after using computer keyboard.

And here I'm sinking my face in both hands and occasionally covering my mouth with one hand and biting my finger tips sometimes.

Not sure if I'm going crazy or my spacebar is full of static 🤔 is that even a thing?

Anytime I move my hand pass the spacebar I get this tingly feeling.....

In 30 years... this is a new!

Raise your hand if you work in an open office landscape and fucking hate it

3 days 2 nights with only 20 min naps and max 1h of sleep in between. I was finishing my masters thesis. Then I handed it in the next day and everything felt like it is in slow motion? The printing, the going there to hand it in, etc. Couldn't sleep for that day either xD do not recommend. Start writing your thesis on time kids

You know what's awkward? Saying "hello" in response to someone who's actually just on the phone.

You know what's worse?

Seeing the phone in their hand, and knowing they are on the phone, but they turn their head to you, make direct eye contact, and THEN say "hey".

What are you supposed to do? It's awkward either way.

Went into a room that hasn’t been visited in a while.
I decided to clear up some space and see how dusty it was.
Naturally I use my hand to take the dust off the table.
My hand is covered in dust.
Because of the absence of a trash can, I have no choice but to open the window and throw the dust outside.

I open the window; a gust of wind rushes inside, blowing all the dust in the room.

Smh.

Pro tip: how to reply to more than one person
1) click reply
2) close the reply by pressing the x button in the upper left hand corner.
3) click reply button of another person. Their name should now be added
4) Reference a Null Pointer
5) Profit?

Positive reviews are ok.
Compliments are weird.

I love receiving good reviews on my software.
(negative but constructive feedback is welcome as well, of course)
But receiving compliments, especially in person is really weird.
On the one hand I know that I did a good job, I know that the features are useful and the UI is classy and comfortable. On the other hand I still feel not comfortable receiving compliments for doing something good.
I don't have any social awkwardness and yet this feels so weird.

Am I alone at this?

>use atom
>move hand from home row to arrow keys to mous to home row
>start getting annoyed
>remember vim did this weird hjkl thingy I always wondered why
>discover atom vim-mode-plus
>fall in love with all the amazing things vim can apparently do

Does anybudy still use Adobe Animate/Flash for web animations?

They teach it at my school and at the moment I see no reason to use it. I'm probaly faster writing it by hand in CSS / JS, and it will run smoother that the animate files...

So I have a date tomorrow. First meeting in person. I’ve got a little time to kill before hand, and need to learn Dart anyway....so I thought it would be fun to code her up something interactive. Kinda like that game Mr and Mrs. Only in the terminal, and for nerds.

Features, ladies and gentleman?

I am bad in english. and good in code. I do many mistakes in my rants and comments.

Sorry Advance.

On other hand. I am cool headed person. so I never mind about things.

"It is not an issue of which language is the best in and if itself. Rather, it's a question of which language is right for the job at hand" - Herbert Schildt

The joys of working remotely: you're on the toilet, happily dumping, with your phone in your hand. Suddenly you receive a message from your manager who wants to chat about something urgent.

How do I explain the reason why he has to wait a couple of minutes?

It's 8am and the server is down... Legit rant right? Sure, but it gets better. One of our buyers in purchasing printed out a 504 error and hand delivered it to my counterpart in our northern office.

Can the devRant team move '++' and '--' to the right side of the post? I'm feeling it really hard to upvote the post while using my 20:9 aspect ratio phone in one hand.

- sincerely a first world user problem

Today I spilt a glass of water onto my palm. As I was shaking the hand of a senior executive. He looked at me in disgust as our hands squelched together.

Whenever Google alerted me that "a new device was used to access your account", I always hear Skyrim's Meridia voice in my head:

"A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON"

As a student, I live in a house with friends and the actual didn't have a table in my room.
So after one month waiting for a answer of the owner I decided to buy one in second hand. All I can say is that I love it.
Any suggestions to some improvements?

PS: external drive is only temporary

Spent the whole day trying to help setup the environment for a colleague. In the end of it all... The whole day went off without any actual productivity. Zero progress on the tasks I have in hand...And then I discovered devRant... Some things happen for a reason...

“fixing” your code the night before you hand in your thesis.
that always works the next morning, when you present it to the professor ...

I actually forced myself to write documentation for my current project. So I have spend hours writing guides and stitching together guides I've found all around the web 😐 On the other hand, now I'll be capable of re-setting up the server in about 30 to 45 minutes 🙃

In every company, there are those non-tech people who try to come up with creative ways to make us not do any work: useless meetings, stupid company activities, "initiatives" cause,
"Gohd! you have to take ann iniitiative".

Okay, I get it. You have a lot of free time on your hand and wanna seem busy. I, on the other hand, want to finish my tasks, get paid, and get on with my life.

We are in AI era but screen readers and softwares for disabled people are still immensely retarded, so we still have to do accessibility by hand, now enforced by EU.

Today, making a list out loud while in a conversation with a co-worker.
Me:
"thing one" *puts out hand*,
"thing two" *raises thumb*,
"thing three" *raises index finger*,
"thing four" *raises middle finger*

Co-worker: "That's 3 fingers, you said 4 things.."
Me: "I guess I mentally counted in base 0.."

So we just finished moving my stuff to my apartment for the year. I haven't been so happy in ages, to think I'm finally going to have a place with my girlfriend :)

On the other hand, I didn't do shit for my projects today. Again.

Seeing devs having only a hammer in their hand is making me sad. At least don't talk bullshit about things you don't understand or haven't tried... Most of the front end devs at my company are like that.

We have a new team member in our team. So I was giving her one to one KT. After KT

She: so are there new changes coming soon?

Me: Yes there will. Now you here I could really use a hand.

She: that's what he said

#1 hand in my notice
#2 start my own company
#3 enjoy work
#4 make a metric shit-ton of money (contributes to previous point)

After javascript, coding in C# feels like I have to communicate with a deaf person with using only one hand. :D

Smashed my right fore finger and middle finger in the car the other day. Didn't realize how frustrating it way going to be to type with one hand 😭

Why is Google so annoying? Download the latest version of Android Studio,, create an empty application from their template, build the empty APK and try to upload it to Google Play. Turns out the template for new app in Android Studio is set to use Experimental SDK, not accepted by Play Console.

Am I the only one who thinks this is dumb and left hand needs to talk to right hand?

UI design android

Back in college we were taught the principle of KISS (Keeping it simple stupid) and experienced it first hand today.Been struggling with a layout design from our designer and had cursed him a lot earlier.
Turns out I only needed few attributes:

android:clipChidren="false"
android:layout_width="wrap_content"
android:layout_gravity="center_horizontal"

One of the students I'm a TA for handed in a one-liner with the comment that his submission was the shortest.
The idiot forgot to add imports for the functions he used, so the code didn't even compile.
Safe to say he didn't get high marks for that.

I'm so used to phones that when I stretched with my 3DS in my hand I was fully prepped for the screens to auto-rotate.

what have you done to me

I broke a bone in my hand yesterday and now my hand is in a cast. fuuuuckkkk...

Me: *ranting to my friend who isn’t a dev (but is in IT and a good knowledge of networking) about a problem I came across in my project.

“I don’t know how I’ll send folders”

Him: “just compress it before hand and decompress when it’s sent”

Me: *mind fucked*

Have any of you guys gotten surprisingly good ideas from non programmers?

How do I avoid carpal tunnel? Simple: my school bag (it's a laptop bag) usually has like 3 laptops in it plus miscellany tools and such, making it over 100 pounds usually. I also don't use a strap, so it's hand-hold only. It also helps train grip strength!

Best work I have ever done was done on a beach, in a lounge chair with a beer in my hand and laptop on the lap.

What would be the best "hot"/upcoming languages for a final year college project?

The project will focus on reverse engineering.

Basic Example: Intercepting signals from products such as a toy helicopters/drones/etc, reverse engineer the signals and try gain control of the device from that.

That's just a very basic function and there will be much more to it, but I'm struggling to decide on a language to pursue hand-in-hand with this project!

I hear Rust, Go, Julia and co being tossed around a lot.

Any suggestions would be helpful!

Cheers

name: ash williams
weapon of choice: chainsaw hand

name: john rambo
weapon of choice: heavy machine gun

name: kiki
weapon of choice: teleport behind you, create a door leading who knows where, drag you in, close the door shut, make it disappear into nowhere

Sorry for not being active these last couple of weeks... That behavior data app was quite a lot of work in a very tight deadline (two weeks) at one moment my setup was getting out of hand (posted in comments)

But that's finally done, onwards to the next overly tight scheduled deadline!... Yaaaay... ☹️

Disclaimer!!!
Do at your own risk.
-----------------------------------
- Take a strong magnet, like a neodymium magnet.
- Hold it in your hand.
- Move your hand across a Macbook 15"'s keyboard. Say from left to right or vice versa. Almost touching they keys.

You'll see the screen dimming. If you just hold it there for a little longer, it'll lock your macbook. It's funny, but I am not sure if it's doing some damage to hardware.

Do cartoon characters with four fingers per hand (and assuming only two arms) naturally think in octal? Or is it just a happy coincidence that humans developed base 10 because we (normally) have 10 fingers?

I started out as a data entry guy. I learned VBA because dealing with thousands of products in excel by hand was a pain in the ass. Among other things, I wrote a macro to combine multiple products into an importable Magento custom product. From there I learned HTML, CSS, JS, and PHP and never looked back.

Attended a game workshop session by Mark Skaggs, creator of Farmville. At one point he asked all the programmers to raise their hands. I love to code even though i aint an expert in backend db related code. I raised my hand. Then he asked all the designers to raise their hand. I love to graphic design as a hobby even though i aint an artist. I raised my hand again.
He noticed and said "Interesting..."

It made me question which trade i should focus more on. I still have years ahead to master them but should i give up one for the other?

Would be cool to hear your thoughts on this!

dev_storyV1.1 (without merge conflict)
Thief: Quick! Hand me your wallet and backpack
Dev: *hands over the empty wallet, takes laptop from bag, pulls from remote, pushes all the commits to remote, deletes local repo, puts laptop in bag, hands over the bag* Here you go mister *sighs*

Just arrived at NYU hospital for a 3 days of medical exams. While walking in from my nice day in NYC I get the feeling like I'm turning myself in at prison....

Then on the other hand compared to work... I'm on a 4 day vacation...

!rant

For the first time ever I actually did well on a Computer Science test. I didn't even hand it in with any errors. It's the baby steps of progress that make me feel pretty happy.

Ramadan and dev work can either go really hand in hand, or it doesn't :(

I was wondering if anyone else gets ctrl+z flashbacks whenever something goes wrong in real life. Example: I burned my hand with hot water today and the first thing that popped in my head was: oh crap! Undo! undo! oh wait...

Nginx 502 Errors and my slow loss of sanity of go hand in hand

Javaw.exe not found. Why the fuck do I have open like 10 files and hand modify them before developing anything useful in Windows...

How do you guys and gals combat RSI? Starting to get pains in my forearms... After a day of coding when I get home I have to prop the right hand side of my keyboard up to game as it gets rid of some of the discomfort...

So someone just beat my highscrore i held for over 2 years in a game I release on Google Play. On one hand I'm happy some put a lot of effort into playing my game😆, on the other hand I'm sad I no longer have the highscrore😢...

Raise your hand if you don’t trust the comments in code most of the time, and take at least a superficial look at the code block to ensure that it does what it says it does.

If you have any exceptions, please share.

My Dad! He used to write private projects in Clipper an dBASE and was quite successful.

At the age of 10 I asked him why I couldn't play games (he was on the pc)... and he showed me then stuck the dBASE book in my hand and told me to design an inventory system for his garage...

That was the beginning

"Always read with a pen in hand. The pen should be used both to mark the text you want to remember and to write from where the text leaves you. Think of the text as the starting point for your own words. " - Mandy Brown

Went for a hand surgery, the anesthetic doctor is learning swift and then he put the needle in the wrong hand.
Lesson learned: never trust a programmer with your life

During my presentations in class, when I use terminal to navigate through folders, unzip the presentation and related files and open the presentation in LibreOffice, I'm termed to be "showing off" my skills
Why can't people appreciate the fact that I did all that even without lifting my hand off the keyboard and in one third the amount of time!

--------Teenager Dilemma-------
When you got homework to do in one hand,
And at the other to go and write a program...
Hmm... 🤔

Hand-coded or drag-and-drop web design do you prefer? And why?

I have been hand coding for a long time since I started programming. In fact, HTML is my first 'language'. I found that it is very slow to code compared to my normal friends who use Wix - which makes me consider a change.

Plus, I am not very good at designing.

If you suspect that you know me "in real
life" {
please raise your hand &&
don't share the answer with the rest -
of the class (🤫);
} else {
enjoy the suspense 🌻💅🔪;
}

Tara

So I've recently hurt ring finger of my left hand and now I'm typing shit while coding. Like I've to retype nearly every word or literal that has S W or X in it. FML

Once I really messed up with git. Lots of conflicts, strange branching, HEAD in detached state etc. Just cloned an earlier version of the repo into a separate folder, hand transferred all the changes I needed to keep and force merged into master as if nothing ever happened.

Start a business, it'll be fun they said. One of those days you'll realise that you're in a situation where you'll have to fire a friend from your engineering team, there's no way around it..

People keep on thinking and saying
"You're so lucky, you can choose the clients and the team, and work whenever you want to.."

Yep. Highest highs and lowest lows go hand in hand. Thank god there's both.

I'm gonna be job shadowing some programmers to see what it's like first hand in the field soon! Its my senior year and it'll count as a field trip for my school so I won't get counted absent!!

Started out with python, while meaning to learn javascript.

I am now competent in python. Im still not sure how it happened.

Started python because I got tired with doing repetative calculations by hand. I think I had like a phobia of problem solving with nested loops. any time I thought a problem would require nesting, especially more than one nested loop, I would just avoid doing it, or end up doing it by hand.

Wrote so many goddamn loops though in the process of exploring graphs, doing things by hand seems like a nuisance. Thinking in loops has its own zen or something.

Now I just need to get over my fear of json-based CLI-enabled configuration-over-convention.

Do you ever set up a project too small to justify using any real framework and you end up creating .gitignore by hand and typing 'node_modules' in it like a caveman?

I'm torn on dev bootcamps.

On one hand, I learn the most in hands-on direct tinkering and bootcamps tend to exude this with well-trained instructors following best practices.

On the other hand, the short timeline means corners are cut and an overwhelming amount of material is dropped all at once leading to a leaky retention vessel at the end.

I prefer ramping up learning over a period of time to gain experience than a fire hose approach.

How many bones are in the human hand? A handful of them.

Does anyone here knows (first hand) how long does it take the entire hiring process at Google in Europe?

From the first contact to the offer?

Thanks a lot

What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!

One of our clients old CMS was completely hand written, allowed execution of PHP files in the uploads directory with an uploader that was publicly accessible, and the "security" was MD5 hashed passwords. Oh and the username/password for the admin user was password.

A hand attachment installed in arms reach of the user's laptop.

Why doesn't writing code doesn't go hand in hand with a breakup ?

Like you can solve complex problems but why did not save this one

In order to be handsome, I tried to wash my face with handsoap.

So this is the only hands-on hand-job I got into.

*Researching Multi-model database options for my tech-stack*

*finds ArangoDB*

*goes on homepage*

*gets greeted by a dude waving his hand and pointing towards a CTA*

*whatthefuck.gif*

*closes the pop-up*

*doesnt close, shrinks to the corner of the screen*

*dude keeps waving his hand*

*cant read documentation for 1 minute without getting distracted by an uncloseable pop-up*

*closes tab*

*crosses out ArangoDB*

Dear ArangoDB,
please invest in your product, instead of brainfarts from a marketing intern.

I‘m currently writing a http proxy server (something like the proxy mod in Apache, but more special). One the one hand is is nice that HTTP 1.1 can use one TCP connection multiple times, but on the other hand it is very annoying. Because I need to rewrite the Host header. And therefore I need the start of the HTTP header. I solved it after some time, but now my code is more complicated than before.

Manager : You really shouldn't be doing that

Dev : Its in my job description

Manager : Yeah but you still shouldn't be doing it.

Dev : Who should I hand it off to?

Manager : We don't have anyone else to hand off that task to.

Dev : Ok , do I stop doing it?

Manager : 😡Of course not , it needs to get done! I'm just saying you shouldn't do it.

Dev : ????????

So here's where I'm at:
I was just offered a position as employee #5 at a small startup in my area with stock options. I've never experienced this before and I'm unbelievably anxious. On the one hand I genuinely believe in their solution/product and can see it being successful. On the other hand I know there's a huge risk associated with joining the company at that stage. Heck, they're still only going for their seed round in Q2 of next year! Meanwhile I'm working comfortably in an intermediate full stack dev role with 150+ people where I feel that I can be as much/little seen as I want. In other words I could probably coast for several years (and maybe slowly move up) without any trouble.

Has anyone else gone through this before? The opportunity could be huge but it feels like I'm rolling the dice... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"Life is conversational. Web design should be the same way. On the web, you’re talking to someone you’ve probably never met – so it’s important to be clear and precise. Thus, well structured navigation and content organization goes hand in hand with having a good conversation." - Chikezie Ejiasi

Working on a poker card simulator. Currently benchmarking the hands by giving them a rating (high card value, pair).

In the simulation there are three players. The first player who get the hand cards first seems to have advantage. Does this make sense?

I have to stop this in the first place, but:
Rebuilding something that already exists as a plugin or module.

Why the fuck should I make everything from zero if there's already something working that suits all of my needs?

On the other hand, avoid abusing the usage of plugins in order to avoid demolishing performance

Finally got a job offer, just waiting on the official letter, I am eager to hand my two weeks in. I'm even tempted to quit outright once I have the offer letter. (No one is under me, there's no training I can provide, no needed bridges would be burned)

Anyone else have or had a computer science professor you wants you to hand in a printed copy of you code? P.S. Only the printed copy nothing else.

Having a cold on a busy time schedule sucks. I almost worked myself to death yesterday by consuming a ungodly ammount of caffeine. Even though the caffeine helped for what felt like 15 minutes, my brain did not seem to function. Just one more worksheet to hand in tomorrow ....

First round of grading the newbies' C hand-ins. Some are decent, some are great, some are way beyond the scope of the curriculum (50 line solution using structs for something that can be done in 5 lines), and some are "oh god why?".

Life as a TA is hard.

!rant
Well I really gotta ask now!
I am Really interested in building CyanogenMod from scratch for my currently unsupported device but I'm overwhelmed by the wiki of CM. Does anyone has an idea where to start? There only a hand full of devs for my device and I want to help. 😥

When you get a shot (immunization) in your right hand because it's your mouse hand and so you can still code with your left.

Should I learn JS or Python?
Python is the better choice for ai as far as I know and I'm interested in learning Django. On the other hand Node.js is great for backend and servers.

I was doing stuff in my room, when I slipped on my hand and landed on my knees. I look up, and I see my Raspberry Pi's GPIO pins puncturing my hand.
Fast-forward couple of hours, I decided to post a picture of it (it wasn't bleeding or anything) on Twitter. 2 seconds pass, and my account got suspended.

I have 2 simcards: one for calls, one for unlimited data.
Twitter is trying to call me to verify the account, but I have my data phone number in the profile.

FML.

Endianess is such a fucken bitch. On one hand I never stumble upon it but currently it's a thing in any project I tackle.

So i have been playing around with Golang for about a week now and like it in some regards but it feels almost too primative to me like it's holding my hand.

Does anyone else feel the same?

Hmmm.. Google Pixel battery just died in a split second from like 50%. On one hand, im concerned about what just happened. On the other hand I hope it happens again so I can sleep in and go to work late without the associated guilt 😉

I'm getting a NFC tag implanted in my hand in Friday by the founder of dangerousthings.com

I'm a little nervous

I had to hand in a PNG image as a word document.

Please explain this "Digital Literacy" course.

2 o clock (night) and i need to hand in a deliverable tomorrow, all small extras are implemented only the main feature not. I was so focused on perfecting everything i forgot functionality. At least it looks fantastic

I went to a job at a company doing document digitizing.
It was the worst mistake of my life the pay was horrible there was no room for advancement for me and it kept me in a constant slow downward financial spiral and just about gimped my hand

Is it me or everyone else also gets interested in absolutely everything while trying to focus on the project on hand?

I seriously think I got interested in programming the same way at the first place 😂😂😁🤣

I held her in my hand as it started booting gave her a new OS and and anti windows background this is
MANJARO

Any dev's that have used the latest version of COSMOS available to give a hand?

Been racking my brain for an error that keeps popping up in visual studio, yet the closest i get to finding it just points me to my filesystem interface that has 0 errors and every class implimented :-/

What should I tell my boss if he wants me to hand over root passwords to everyone in the office just cause there should be more than one person available to handle problems if I'm not available.

All these other people in the office have no experience with Linux or servers at alll and will fuck it up I know for sure.

Romeo and Juliet
Are together in eternity
40,000 men and women everyday
Another 40,000 coming everyday
We can be like they are, come on, baby
Don't fear the Reaper, baby, take my hand
Don't fear the Reaper, we'll be able to fly
Don't fear the Reaper, baby, I'm your man

STOP CHANGING THINGS TO BE MORE ANNOYING

SHIP THE CORRECT PARTS NOT DAMAGED ONES

STOP REMOVING MONEY
AND FINE IF THE "GOLDS" WANT MY DICK UP THEIR NETHER PARTS JUST LET THEM HAND THAT OUT
DOESNT MATTER HOW MANY GODDAMN STANDINS THERE ARE IN AN LCD BACK ZIMMERMAN !!!

MOTHERFUCKER ! ARRGH !

I’m blatantly begging...

Anyone have any google adwords promo codes they’re not gonna use?

I think it would be kind of fun to share the country of origin(optionally, of course). I've made it clear in the past that I live in Greece, and I've been wondering if there's anyone here living less than 200km away or something.
On the other hand, it could also be creepy, I don't know...

I wonder if there is any tool to measure the amount of spaghetti code in my project... it feels really messed up.
Anyone got a testing tool at hand for it?

TMW your teacher requires you to hand in an image in a word document....

While hand-testing comment-posting functionality messed up the migrations and damaged local db. Had to recreate the whole set up (users, posts, etc) in order to resume the testing by hand.

Should've written the tests ;(

Oh man I sure do love having three separate code generators in one project with some additional hand written versions of the data containers so that every time the system engineers decide we need to change something about a data structure I have to update 1-3 hand written mapping functions. (Kill me please)

I’m in the middle of a 2:30h SCRUM meeting and the only thing I have to say is that Bill Cosby drinks would be less soporific.
Honestly, why managers can’t just hand out the tasks instead of forcing us to look at them discussing them?

Not a rant!

Anyone who worked with Angular 4 with ngRX 4 interested in lending a helping hand. I an stuck with some error from past 36hrs.
😥