Google => googled

Duck duck go => duck duck went?

🤔

My friend said "I googled it on duck duck go"

Me: Dude what?

If you are reading this, I want you to know that I am probably on some kind of FBI watchlist because I googled "How to kill all children while leaving the parent alive". So yeah, Linux is brutal.

Is a negative upload the same as download?

Its Friday, you all know what that means! ... Its results day for practiseSafeHex's most incompetent co-worker!!!

*audience: wwwwwwooooooooo!!!!*

We've had a bewildering array of candidates, lets remind ourselves:

- a psychopath that genuinely scared me a little
- a CEO I would take pleasure seeing in pain
- a pothead who mistook me for his drug dealer
- an unbelievable idiot
- an arrogant idiot obsessed with strings

Tough competition, but there can be only one ... *drum roll* ... the winner is ... none of them!

*audience: GASP!*
*audience member: what?*
*audience member: no way!*
*audience member: your fucking kidding me!*

Sir calm down! this is a day time show, no need for that ... let me explain, there is a winner ... but we've kept him till last and for a good reason

*audience: ooooohhhhh*

You see our final contestant and ultimate winner of this series is our good old friend "C", taking the letters of each of our previous contestants, that spells TRAGIC which is the only word to explain C.

*audience: laughs*

Oh I assure you its no laughing matter. C was with us for 6 whole months ... 6 excruciatingly painful months.

Backstory:

We needed someone with frontend, backend and experience with IoT devices, or raspberry PI's. We didn't think we'd get it all, but in walked an interviewee with web development experience, a tiny bit of Angular and his masters project was building a robot device that would change LED's depending on your facial expressions. PERFECT!!!

... oh to have a time machine

Working with C:

- He never actually did the tutorials I first set him on for Node.js and Angular 2+ because they were "too boring". I didn't find this out until some time later.

- The first project I had him work on was a small dashboard and backend, but he decided to use Angular 1 and a different database than what we were using because "for me, these are easier".

- He called that project done without testing / deploying it in the cloud, despite that being part of the ticket, because he didn't know how. Rather than tell or ask anyone ... he just didn't do it and moved on.

- As part of his first tech review I had to explain to him why he should be using if / else, rather than just if's.

- Despite his past experience building server applications and dashboards (4 years!), he never heard of a websocket, and it took a considerable amount of time to explain.

- When he used a node module to open a server socket, he sat staring at me like a deer caught in headlights completely unaware of how to use / test it was working. I again had to explain it and ultimately test it for him with a command line client.

- He didn't understand the need to leave logging inside an application to report errors. Because he used to ... I shit you not ... drive to his customers, plug into their server and debug their application using a debugger.

... props for using a debugger, but fuck me.

- Once, after an entire 2 days of tapping me on the shoulder every 15 mins for questions / issues, I had to stop and ask:

Me: "Have you googled it?"
C: "... eh, no"
Me: "can I ask why?"
C: "well, for me, I only google for something I don't know"
Me: "... well do you know what this error message means?"
C: "ah good point, i'll try this time"

... maybe he was A's stoner buddy?

- He burned through our free cloud usage allowance for a month, after 1 day, meaning he couldn't test anything else under his account. He left an application running, broadcasting a lot of data. Turns out the on / off button on the dashboard only worked for "on". He had been killing his terminal locally and didn't know how to "ctrl + c a cloud app" ... so left it running. His intention was to restart the app every time you are done using it ... but forgot.

- His issue with the previous one ... not any of his countless mistakes, not the lack of even trying to make the button work, no, no, not for C. C's issue is the cloud is "shit" for giving us such little allowances. (for the record in a month I had never used more than 5%).

- I had to explain environment variables and why they are necessary for passwords and tokens etc. He didn't know it wasn't ok to commit these into GitHub.

- At his project meetups with partners I had to repeatedly ask him to stop googling gifs and pay attention to the talks.

- He complained that we don't have 3 hour lunch breaks like his last place.

- He once copied and pasted the same function 450 times into a file as a load test ... are loops too mainstream nowadays?

You see C is our winner, because after 6 painful months (companies internal process / requirements) he actually achieved nothing. I really mean that, nothing. Every thing was so broken, so insecure / wide open, built without any kind of common sense or standards I had to delete it all and start again ... it took me 2 weeks.

I hope you've all enjoyed this series and will join me in praying for the return of my sanity ... I do miss it a lot.

Yours truly,
practiseSafeHex

When I Googled a problem I faced, and found a YouTube video solving it, then tried to thumb 👍 it up, but YouTube said: "You can not like your own videos!"
.
.
I recorded it for a friend two years ago!

Long rant ahead, but it's worth it.

I used to work with a professor (let's call him Dr. X) and developed a backend + acted as sysadmin for our team's research project. Two semesters ago, they wanted to revamp the front end + do some data visualization, so a girl (let's call her W) joined the team and did all that. We wanted to merge the two sites and host on azure, but due to issues and impeding conferences that require our data to be online, we kept postponing. I graduate this semester and haven't worked with the team for a while, so they have a new guy in charge of the azure server (let's call him H), and yesterday my professor sends me (let's call me M), H and W an email telling us to coordinate to have the merge up on azure in 2-3 days, max. The following convo was what I had with H:

M: Hi, if you just give me access to azure I'll be able to set everything up myself, also I'll need a db set up, and just send me the connection string.
H: Hi, we won't have dbs because that is extra costs involved since we don't have dynamic content. Also I can't give you access, instead push everything on git and set up the site on a test azure server and I will take it from there.
M: There is proprietary data on the site...
H: Oh really? I don't know what's on it.
<and yet he knows we have no dynamic data>
M: Fine, I'll load the data some other way, but I have access to all the data anyway, just talk to Dr. X and you'll see you can give me access. Delete my access after if you want.
H: No, just do what I said: git then upload to test azure account.

Fine, he's a complete tool, but I like Dr. X, so I message W and tell her we have to merge, she tells me that it's not that easy to set it up on github as she's using wordpress. She sends me instructions on what to do, and, lo and behold, there's a db in her solution. Ok, I go back to talking to H:

M: W is using a db. Talk to her so we can figure out whether we need a database or not.
H: We can't use a database because we want to decrease costs.
M: Yes I know that, so talk to her because that probably means she has to re-do some stuff, which might take some time. Also there might be dynamic content in what she's doing.
H: This is your project, you talk to her.
<I'm starting to get mad right now>
M: I don't know what they had her do apart from how it interfaces with what I've done.
H: We still can't have databases.
M: Listen, I don't do wordpress, and I'm not gonna mess with it, you talk to her
H: I won't do any development
<So you won't do any dev, but you won't give me access to do it either?>
M: Man, the bottleneck isn't the merging right now, it's the fact that W needs a db
H: I know, so talk to her
M: THE RESTRICTION TO NOT HAVE DATABASES IS NOT MINE, IT'S YOURS, YOU TALK TO HER. I can't evaluate whether it's a reasonable enough reason or not since I don't know the requirements or what they're willing to spend.
H: It's your project.
M: Then give me fucking access to azure and I'll handle it, you know you'll have to set up wordpress again regardless whether we set it up the first time.
H: Man just do your job.

At this point I lost it. WHAT A FUCKING TOOL. He doesn't wanna do dev work, wants me to go through the trouble of setting up on a test subscription first, and doesn't want to give me access to azure. What's more, he did shit all and doesn't want to anything else. Well fuck you. I googled him, to see if he's anyone important, if he's done anything notable which is why he's being so God damn condescending. MY INTERNSHIP ALONE ECLIPSES HIS ENTIRE CV. Then what the fuck?

There's also this that happened sometime during our talk:

M: You'll have to take to Dr. Y so he'll change the DNS to point to the azure subscription instead of my server.
H: Yea don't worry, too early for that.
M: DNS propagation takes 24 hours...
H: Yea don't worry.

DNS propagation allows the entire web to know that your website is hosted on a different server so it can change where it's pointing to. We have to do this in 2-3 days. Why do work in parallel? Nah let's wait.

I went over his head and talked to the professor directly, and despite wanting to tell him that he was both drunk and high the day he hired that guy, I kept it professional. He hasn't replied yet, but this fucker's pompous attitude is just too much for me alone, so I had to share.

PS: I named his contact as Annoying Prick 4 minutes into our chat. Gonna rename him cz that seems tooooooo soft a name right now.

Fucking someone has to fix the recruiting process.

Fucking who gives a shit about your experience, and what you did so long.

Here take this fucking shitty problem that I googled, so that I can judge you by this one fucking problem.

Oh, youve worked on variety of technologies? Fuck you.

Fuck these interviews. Fml.

That weak moment when I googled “how to invert a boolean”

My grandma comes to me with all her computer problems, but this time she came to tell me a story instead.

She said she was about to call me for help, and then thought about what I would do. "Google it."
And guys, she did. She googled it. And she got an answer.

I taught her to fish, guys :) I did it.
One down, 6,999,999,998 to go...

I lost my sanity and googled ”FUCK YOU XCODE YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT”...

That's how I found devRant.

How did you guys find devRant?

Me:
*Googled "Why PHP Sucks"*
*Landed on devrant.io*

I had a headache. I googled my symptoms, now am a cancer patient 🙄

So I didn't know why I kept seeing rubber ducks on devRant. Apparently, I'm not very good at typing today, either.

The result? I now have to explain why I Googled "rubber dick debugging" at work.

A lot of people use the word "google" as a verb when they search on google.com by saying " i googled that ...", but me i use only DuckDuckGo, so what i should say? hmm find it :D " i duckduckwent that .. "

How I discovered devrant -> I googled "wow intellij is so fucking slow i cant believe it"

this isn't even a tech thing. it just fucking bamboozled me. I overheard a conversation today.

> "duuuude you gotta make a better password that shit is insecure af"

> "bruh i did, i googled it"

> "googled what?"

> "how to make a good password"

> "so how longs your password?"

> "not long, it's bob2"

> "where's your capital?"

> "I made the '2' capital"

> "so you capitalized a number…"

thank god he walked away. he even told him his fucking password. ignorance.

Please don't make junior developers feel they're a burden.
Have you ever googled "how to mentor junior developers"? It's quite mind-blowing how many articles, talks and panels are on this topic. And yet still junior developers are not feeling welcomed in their companies.
Yup, you guessed it, we also have something to add (based on our own experience):

1. Asking for help is not easy. Please don't blow juniors off by telling them to read docs when they ask a question. Always assume they've read it and did a sprint to solve the problem. They ask you, because they see you as a mentor and really need your help. If you can, spend more time with them and guide through the entire problem solving process.

2. Please don't think "I learnt it this way so you should too". If you're in charge of teaching a junior developer, don't expect them to be a carbon copy of yourself. Because even though in your opinion your approach is more "pro", they might not be there yet to use it properly. And last, but not least:

3. Of course, juniors will compare themselves with seniors on their team. And there'll be moments they feel so guilty and so afraid that they cost the company too much, that they need training, and supervision, or are between projects and are not bringing in any money, and they'll fear that their company regrets hiring them. Make sure they don't feel like a burden. As juniors, we often
have this misconception what is expected from us.

Dear tech companies, please set very clear expectations and tell your juniors you're happy. Don't get us wrong here. We don't expect unicorns, roses and pats on the back from companies. We do understand- this is business, and at the end of the day we all are here to make money. To do so, companies need to make smart investments. Junior dev with a great assistance, planned support, and a clear training program will become a great asset. It really is as simple as that.

Tonight I was getting ready to pay my monthly apartment maintenance bill so I Googled my property management company's name because I always forget the url. It's always the first result, but I noticed Google placed a little "This site may be hacked." line of text on their listing.

Seeing that before and knowing what it means, I went into the source for their index page, and to my suspicion, their WordPress installation was hacked with the standard invisible spam links.

I realize this happens to a lot of WordPress blogs, but this is an NYC property management company that is responsible for a lot of buildings and has millions of dollars in contracts. Normally I would inform them, but having dealt with them in the past I don't like them very much, but more importantly, I don't think they'd understand what I was saying because they are so technically inept. They might even think that because I found this, that I had something to do with it.

So devRant, it is up to you. What should I do?

I googled "fuck apple" and ended up here... so yeah fuck this piece of shit company with shitty overpriced cancer inducing products. Xcode is the worse garbage I've ever seen in my life. For a company that masturbates to their superior design well they can eat a fat dick cause its horrible. Everything this fucking company does makes me waste my time. Add a fucking notch to their displays, retarded app store process, makes you workaround to install latest OS on older machines, hide options in convoluted interface, everything, make you feel like your 12 again and living with your parents. fuck them. fuck apple fan boys. fuck tim cook. fuck kids that jack off to iphones fuck you if you own a macbook and drink at starbucks . this is the last fucking ios app I ever make. bye

I've just googled

"How to kill a demonized puma"

And now I'm not sure anymore if I'm a developer or a wizard

Client comes to me after a year to publish an update to his app.

I accept, start looking for my release key.... Found it.

Fuuuuuuucccck what's the password? I can't remember

Googled what to do if forgot password of keystore: Nope can't do shit other than brute Force. You've to forget your app and publish as a new app. Nice.

I must have written it somewhere... I'm sure. Check my password manager: Nope.

Start brute forcing:
Default pass: android. Nope
Name of app? Nope

After 10 mins of brute forcing:
Why would I not store the password in my password manager? The only reason I can think is the password is too stupid to be stored.

Try "password". App signed successfully.

I'm ashamed of 1 year older me xD

RANT Incoming
Not necessarily dev related but I need to get this off my chest.

So a bit of a backstory. I had to stay late from school the other day and ended up having to take an Uber home. The ride was fine lady was nice. Everything seems to be going well and there were no signs of any payment failure.

Then yesterday, I had to stay late again. I never said that I had an outstanding balance on my account. Apparently Uber was having problems charging my Android pay account.
So I ended up being stuck at school for like 3 hours. Great!😑

So I emailed Uber when I got home. And this is when I started pulling my hair out. I don't know how many replies I had, but each time I had to tell them that I was not using a prepaid card.

This was one of my replies:
"I'm sorry, are you real? If you are, here is a quick summary of the issue. I am using ANDROID PAY with my CHASE DEBIT CARD. Not, NOT, NOT a prepaid card. I happen to know that CHASE DEBIT CARD(which is the card I use, in case you have already forgotten) works with uber because MY FATHER USES THE EXACT SAME TYPE OF CARD with uber. He uses a CHASE DEBIT CARD(again I use that same type of card as well). So by using LOGIC I am able to deduce that a CHASE DEBIT CARD is in fact compatible. AGAIN THIS IS NOT A PREPAID CARD!!! If the card is incompatible, WHY DOES THE APP ALLOW BE TO ADD IT?!?! Also in response to your last email... Because I am using Android pay, do you really think that an ANDROID would be able to use APPLE pay? Also Google wallet is DISCONTINUED! Finally, PayPal DOES NOT CONNECT TO UBER. Returns a "Server Error." So please stop wasting my time with generic help solutions. Believe me, I have already googled my issue, and nothing comes up. That is why I contacted Uber. I want my driver to be paid, and, uber had made it SO painful with unhelpful "Solutions" to problems that don't even APPLY TO MY ISSUE. No not even mention PREPAID cards in your reply or I will consider you a robot built by monkeys banging their heads on a keyboard. Uber HAS my VALID payment information, USE IT! If there is a phone number I can call, please, enlighten me"

And the response was:
"Thanks for reaching out with this.

Happy to help with this issue you are having.

After reviewing your I can see that the only payment method associated with your account is an ANDROID PAY card and it is also a prepaid card. Some cards and methods are not compatible with our billing processes and can't be used with Uber. This includes prepaid cards."

So I concluded that they are monkeys.

Then Uber banned me from logging into my account because I didn't pay.
So now it is impossible for me to pay because I can't do anything with my account.

Now they want my SSN and a bunch of other shit that I won't give them.

I told them that they were being illogical, and I got the exact same response about the prepaid bullshit.

So I sent them this photo as a goodbye.

I get my driver's licence next weekend, so I won't need Uber anymore. YAY!

Also mind grammatical errors, I talked it in and am to lazy to proofread

I'm not sure if this counts as a rant, but I'll proceed anyway.

So it's been very long since I've used AngularJS and recently I had to use it for some new project. I had to pass data across the states without showing it in the URL. Remembering solving that that thing before, I straight away Googled and got a Stackoverflow question with accepted answered. Delighted, I've gone through it and realising that I didn't up vote that answer, clicked on the up vote button. But as it turns out, I CANNOT up vote it. Not because I didn't have enough reputation, but because it was MY OWN ANSWER!

I'm not sure if I should be happy or sad :/:/:/

So back in January 2015 I bought my first Mac and wanted to learn Swift. Coming from .Net C# IBOutlet was anew concept for me, had to search for how to make a button event and Google gave that 😐

**I just googled it for the sake of this rant but ya it happened 😅

Googled "prevent memory leaks in delphi".
Came across a library called TCondom.
Talk about naming your classes aptly.

Just gonna leave this here.

Don't complain if you refuse to speak up. You don't like how something is going? But you don't want to do something about it? Then shut. The. Fuck. Up.

Getting sick of these fucking coworkers who bitch and whine about everything they don't like but when given the opportunity to speak up and voice their shit they just fucking clam up.

Context: nobody was saying anything during today's retrospective but were talking shit about the project the whole sprint. Gee I wonder why NOTHING FUCKING CHANGES. I'm the only one outside of our product owner and tech lead who even speaks out on problems/issues during the sprint. This dev team I'm on is just.. urgh.

They expect me to have their back, but they don't have mine. For months I've been carrying them. Fine. Enough is enough. The next time they need help from me they'll just get the obligatory "have you googled it because I don't have an answer" response.

So I just googled "ts playground" - never was I misunderstood more.

Sometimes I feel I'm the live version of stack overflow for my family and friends...
Mom: The printer is acting up, how do I fix it?
Brother: I can't login to Netflix, help!
Grandparents: could you fix the radio/TV?
Gf: Apple can't validate my .uk mail

All to which I replied with the answer to life, the universe and everything...

FUCKING GOOGLE IT! Have you googled it?!

And the inevitable reply: no.

The only ones who get a free pass are my grandparents they were born in the 40's and think YouTube works on voodoo.

I'm talking with this teenager that believes himself an engineer because he built a PC.

He is vehement in telling me that Linux came out in 2007 and it was Valve who developed it for Steam!

They he Googled it to prove me wrong and then... never spoke to me again 😂

I'm an Arch user dude! That's like, just one level under Linus Torvalds!

Legends -> I: Interviewer

I: what is mvc architecture

Me: model.. view.. controller... and blah blah

I: mvc is not an architecture.. its a design pattern.. architecture is blah blah

I: srry U r rejected.. god bless you

Me: 😥😢

after 1hr

Me: googled 'Is mvc a design pattern or architectural pattern'

Google: shows stack overflow link

Stackoverflow: mvc is architectural pattern blah blah... accepted answer

Me: hopeless about my future

GOD BLESS THE INTERNET and SOFTWARE DEVELOPERS

My mom has a new IPad.
it took my mother and sister 4 hours to make an apple ID.

I offered to help, but they said they wanted to do it themselves

So, i opened my sister's laptop and opened google, i googled: "How to setup an apple ID". left the laptop near them, and hoped they notice it, and they did.

I flashed TWRP in my phone and it didn't boot anymore. I didn't have any image of any operating system in my sdcard and my pc hasn't a sd card slot.
So I started thinking, I googled for some solution, I tried the official tools, but nothing worked. So I started writing an adb script able to download the image from the server and install it in my phone.
While I was doing it I was also explaining my troubles to my no-tech friend. She's not confident with computers, she's able only to turn the pc on and go to Facebook.
She told me "why don't you put your sd card in another phone and download the operating system from it?"

She literally saved my day.

Sometimes we are so busy with our geek things and we forget trivial solutions

I hate my job. I am furious at my colleagues.

Last November I asked my colleagues (A and B) to help me learn to use something, let's call it Tool. They said okay and set a date for training. Next week they said that they had too much work to do so we'll​ have to postpone. And the next date was also postponed and the next one too, and so on.

Three months in,​ colleague C kept dicking around and being a complete jackass telling me that he refused to work with me for I don't use the Tool.
Not like I didn't want to learn to use the Tool, I simply couldn't. I have long before googled how to use the Tool but in no way can Google ever tell me about our own company workflow, our methods, habits and such.

I was furious, but I am also a the most fucking patient person ever so I let it slide. The Tool wasn't actually needed that much to do my job anyways. And I have known for a while that colleague C needed to push someone under him to feel good about himself.

A few more dates had been set but got cancelled for reasons.
Meanwhile both A and B started to look down on me for not knowing how to use the Tool. I started to feel depressed.

Today B held a "workshop" about the Tool. It took two hours. He was not prepared, had a hangover and generally had a hard time concentrating.
He used aliases that he set up only for himself to show the usage of the Tool instead of commands that a beginner would understand (or google). He kept mumbling and I hsd trouble understanding him. His lecture lacked direction and was all over the place.

I am devastated and furious. I had been waiting since November for this training and when the time actually came he pulled something out of his ass and called it a workshop.

I didn't even get answers for my questions.

Now I feel that I am actually in a worse position than before because while I still cannot use the Tool, they can tell me that there was a workshop and I should've paid closer attention.

I want to quit so bad.

Devrant client update:

- load indicator on ajax execs
- changed the design yet again, hopefully final this time lol
- implemented ajax content loading so the menubar doesn't flash
- block users/keywords plugins done, only left to find a clean way to integrate it with the upcoming notifications, so no notifications are fired for blocked users or posts with blocked keywords (similar to twitter mute keywords)
- usernames linkifier plugin
- links get unshortened on feed too (via plugin), without losing the ability to press on a post

next is (just to name a few, the trello list is far bigger by now)

- login
- local notifications, should be firing without GCM/FCM too hopefully, which would be great for people on here that de-googled entirely and don't want microG
- port some of my userscript plugins I haven't yet
- theme system
- global and plugin settings
- plugin update system
- plugin import checks for obfuscated code, one line etc. and warns the user
- client update system

Disclaimer: I have a strong hate towards apple for multiple reasons and this will only be temporary. (thank God for that)

My oneplus one is battery dead and the power button quit as well. Repair costs would be as expensive as buying a new phone (200-300 price range) so searching for a new one.

But, I need a temporary phone in the mean time.
A phone with googled-android is absolutely a no-go. I used to do that sometimes but those were wrong decisions.

So, for the sake of trying, I'm going for a second hand iPhone.
Will be testing how it works for me (never been able to form an opinion on it since iOS 4.2 (iPod touch)) and will also be searching my ass off for a smartphone which supports lineage/rooting (TIPS BETWEEN ABOVES PRICE RANGE ARE VERY WELCOME) because I'm fucking hell not planning on using that (the iPhone) fucker any longer than a month.
Even if I love it over android (highly doubt that), I won't continue using it for very specific reasons.

Wish me luck 😅

My mom was kind of addicted to one of those fake news buzzfeed kind of online communities. She used to send me these posts like every day.

Spent about two months deliberately destroying each and every "scientific article" she sent me. It was a pseudo-scientific trash fake news kind of page and pretty much every article was just made up or had same kind of communities as a reference. I just googled the shit out of each and every topic.

She's unsubscribed now.

Feels good. I noticed that most of people of previous generations really need to be taught how to use google. Some of these communities are full-blown propaganda machines spreading things like anti-vaxx or similar.

(Meeting with Client)
Client: The script you sent us is broken... It can't run... We can't test now. (Their supervisor even insinuated that I did that on purpose :/ What?!)
Asked for logs, googled for solutions. Moments later.
Client: Oh it's our server's problem.
:/

When I thought I hacked Facebook.

I somehow managed to "inspect element" and changed a couple of the words on the page. I reloaded the page and all my work was gone... I tried it again and again then googled how to hack. I then learned how to make batch scripts. the rest is history.

i am BEYOND pissed at google.

as some of you know, i recently got android studio to run on a chromebook (you read that right), but it being a chromebook and google being a protective fucktard of their crappy operating system, i had to boot into bios every time i started it.

when i was with some friends, i started up the chromebook, and left, after telling my friends how to boot the chromebook.

ten seconds and literally one press of the esc button later, he broke the entire thing.

but that's not what that rant was about, i honestly knew it would happen eventually (although, this wasn't the best time).

so now this screen pops up.

"chrome os is damaged or missing, please insert a usb recovery drive" or something like that.

well, i'll create one. simple enough.

no wait, this is google, just your average 750 billion dollar company who cares more about responsive design then a product actually responding.

i started to create the recovery usb. of course, chrome developers thought it would be a good idea to convert the old, working fine, windows executable usb recoverer, and replace with with a fucking chrome extension.

i truly hope someone got fired.

so, after doing everything fine with the instructions, it got to the part where it wrote the os image to the usb. the writing stayed at 0%.

now this was a disk thing, writing os's and shit, so i didn't want to fuck it up. after waiting ten minutes, i pressed 'cancel.'

i tried again many times, looked things up, and frantically googled the error. i even tried the same search queries on bing, yahoo, duckduckgo and ecosia because i had the feeling google secretly had tracked me over the past 7 years and decided to not help me after all the times i said google was a fucker or something similar.

google is a fucker.

after that, i decided to fuck with it, even if it formats my fucking c drive.

i got to the same point where the writing got stuck at 0% and proceeded to fuck. i start spamming random keys, and guess what?

after i press enter, it started.

what the fuck google?
1000s of people read the article on how to make the recovery drive. why not tell them to press the goddamn enter key?

i swear there are hundreds of other people in my same situation. and all they have to do is press one fucking key???

maybe tell those people who tried to fix the shit product you sold them.

fuck you google.

Fellow Dev: the clients are requesting a gallery on their website with functioning modals.

Me: okay cool

So for the record, I'm new to front-end and I've got quite a lot to learn in JavaScript.

*I googled as much as I could and I made a proper functioning gallery in 2 full days of coding*

Him: okay, so this is great but they aren't really digging it.

Me: *sigh* yes, so what do they want?

Him: have you seen how an image opens in Google images? Like you click on one, the image opens while the rest of the content shifts down?

Me: um... Yeah?

Him: yeah, so they want that.

Me: ... *Scoops the web trying to figure out how Google does it*. Dude, I can't find anything close to it and I've still got a lot to learn. Idk how to do it.

Him: well, you're being paid for that. So, you better do it.

Me: 1000Rs ( approx. 14.58$ ) isn't called "being paid". Gimme a break here.

Him: You're a novice rn.

Me: why don't you do it?

Him: I'm your boss.

*Sigh* (he indeed is my boss)

Him: deal with it.

Me: FU........C.....*suddenly I realized how it's done* OH OH OH OH I just got it, I just got it!

(I actually make something like that)

*Lol yay*

That's just my best story of a fight. Lol.

I didn't actually realize anyone could be this dumb. Sure, I'd heard stories, but I wasn't sure that I'd ever come across this level of stupidity in the wild. I was moving email across hosting accounts for someone, and I asked them to please navigate to a certain domain. Then they asked what navigate meant, so I told them to please type it into the URL bar. They said "OK." 5 seconds later, they said, "Which one do I click on?" They googled the url. So I asked them to please type it into the URL BAR. Then they asked what that was.

...like what? I just told you this yesterday. How fast does information fall out of your head? Do you forget where your toilet is when you wake up every morning? How do these people even function in society?

-_-

Fuck articles which are nothing more than tweets wrapped in ads and paragraphs which repeat the content of the tweets.

Yeah I know that software version x was released, I just read the fucking tweet! — I googled for more details, which points me at 10 mainstream tech news blogs, which are all in the business of fluffing up three sentences into 6 paragraphs without adding any value.

I wish Twitter just charged royalty fees to embed on for-profit websites.

AAAAAARRRRGGHHHH FUUUCKKER!!!

The new MacBook Pro with touchbar is ABSOLUTELY SHITE.

I can't tell you how many times I have accidentally touched the escape key with my pinky while typing. Also accidentally touched "send" while in apple Mail halfway through writing something.

Apple clearly did no user testing with this as I have googled around and many folk are having the same frustrations.

I've just typed a massive note into jira and towards the end my pinky hit the escape key and I lost everything!!

FUCK CUNT BASTARD WANK!!!

I have those conversations with my coworkers about once a day. We use Linux at work and I am the only one with any real Linux experience.

C: I have a problem! I tried and googled everything already! Come help me...
M: *slowly walks over to their PC*
M: *copy-pastes the error into Google*
M: *clicks the first result*
M: *presses two buttons*
*everything works again*
M: So you tried Google already, have you?

When I leave there (it's a PhD position and I'm almost done) they will probably crash and burn...

I almost gave up. I allready wrote an email to may boss, to admit my approach doesn't work, that he was right from the beginning, that i can't do it with a brunch of bash scripts, but special software has to be bought. I almost gave up. But then i just googled around a little more and found another approach to solve my problem. And it fucking worked!

As much as I love opensource I hate really hate some of its actvie community members (read this as "freetards" <-- see urbandictonary). As a .Net + web devloper with minimal C experience (I just started learning it) and literally no Python experience its not really easy to contribute for me to many (most) opensource software for linux. I am using some <unnamed software> and I found a <critical bug>, it was easy to reproduce and I wrote for list of possible solutions, found it in a code and linked and basically wrote a docummentation longer than any other I ever wrote for every single project I did ever, combined. This <software> was critical for my server and since owner of github repo and few other people there were really active, I hoped that this bug with pretty good documentation will be solved fast, I went to my bed with a heroic feeling of an open source community contributor that helped saving world. I was horribly wrong. Tomorrow, I got 3 passively agressive responses from owner and other 2 freetards that summed up said <other1>:"oh thats nice, fix i yourself and commit it", <other2>:"have a sex with yourself" in a nice way, and <owner>: "fix my softwate and create mrege request". After replying that I have no experience my Python skills are not on a level requied for such an action, he messaged me on twitter I have linked to my GitHub profile saying even less nicely that I am a "retarded c*nt" and that I should learn Python and fix it myself. This makes me stay with my Windows based Server for some time now, fuck this. I googled his github nickname and guess what. Our main freetard is admin on an <unnamed linux forum> and mebmber of many other "computer help" with literally half of his posts just slightly toxic posts about how everyone should use linux and how supreme it is ober anything other, the other hals was crying why linux has only 1% of market share. Oh boi I am not sure why but ITS MAYBE BECAUSE OF FREETARDS LIKE YOU.
And the funnies thing is, hes not only freetard, he is just fullstack retard. One of his posts is "helping" to some <noob windows user> installing Linux. tl:dr for this las part: Freetard basically wiped all data of that <noob>.

PS: Bless everyone who do not respond "oh nice, now you can do it yourself"

Once I was frustrated by a Javascript bug

So I Googled "Retarded JS'"

And holy fuckkk

I found a npm module 😁

Then I Googled "Asshole JS"

Holy mother of all fuckkks

I FOUND THE COOLEST JS LIBRARY EVER 😁😂

Can I just say that the absolute most important skill for any kind of programmer or engineer is knowing HOW TO FUCKING GOOGLE!!!

<Background>
I am the head of programing on my school's Robotics Team. We're relatively know, however most all of my teammates know how to program and they are all very talented academically. In fact my "Lieutenant" will be the valedictorian.
</Background>

Seriously I missed one meeting yesterday because of the flu. Imagine me lying in bed and suddenly getting multiple calls from the team (even the valedictorian) asking how to fix errors from Android Studio. I asked them if they googled them and they said "No we didn't".

Why is knowing how to google not apart of any kind of CS education! They could have been after an hour, but NOOO it took them after 5 hours!!

Oh my FUCKING GOD!!

Googled what is PHP

come on! are there any devs who have never ever googled an error message? :)

Copy paste from the internet, usually stack overflow without knowing what the fuck the lines do.
I saw this girl who was tasked with building a spring mvc application and she literally googled(yeah googled) "spring mvc web app" and copied from the first tutorial site and pasted it.
When errors showed up she copied everything from the second link and pasted it ... Wait for it... Without deleting the old copy but commenting it out so each file had 100 lines of code and 100 lines of comment

Someone just sent a connect request via Skype. The request had a full name so Googled and then LinkedIn'd

Found a few matches but her headline was: Intelligence Officer at National Geospatial-Intelligence Agency

sorta worrying?

Story time!

Like I mentioned in a previous rant, I’m (or was) a coca-cola addict. Coca-cola has caffeine, right?

This happened a tuesday. I forgot my mug at home (I wanted to draw it a bat🦇) so I bought a jumbo coffee at a store near my office. I drank it, and then, all my partners went to the kitchen for coffee. I went with them and I refilled my cup.

I was working on my code, and suddenly I felt a strange sensation on my chest (I don’t think I could describe it, it feels like when you have intestinal problems and gases, but in the chest). I didn’t give it importance. One hour later I started trembling. I googled my symptoms and I found I had a coffee overdose 😱 But how? I drank a lot of caffeine in soda, but this only happened to me with coffee. This lasted 5 hours 😓

You, specially the most experienced devs and coffee addicts, how can I drink more than 1 cup of coffe per day without trembling? Btw, I have no heart or pressure problems, so I don’t know... this happened because I don’t drink much coffee?

I'm curious, how did you all start to like programming?

Mine was when I was in grade 7 or 8, which is around 13 years old. I watched a movie called "Hackers", Angelina Jolie was in this one (I think, it was a long time). I was curious on how to be a hacker, then I googled and found an article which said something about learning to code.

I wasn't sure I would enjoy it at first but after a while, I started enjoying that thrill you get when you solve that pesky little bug that took you days to get rid of. Haven't stopped learning more about programming and computers since.

I tried a few methods.

First osmosis. I would put several programming books under my pillow but that was just a pain in the neck.

Next I tried the TF/RQ methods. I would try to write some code not knowing anything about the language. When it didn't work I'd rage quit and flip the table. That ended with a pile of broken IKEA desks and a lot of spilled coffee. (RIP Coffee 😔)

Finally I sat down and came up with a problem I wanted to solve. I googled it, looked at answers. Tried the code myself, if it worked I'd go over it piece by piece so I could explain to anyone exactly what it did and why.

Honestly, learning to code just comes down to doing it and being fearless. The more curious you are, the more you'll learn.

It finally happened. I hit an issue and googled it. No related stack overflow articles. Even on page two. I must be doing something right in life

When I left school I decided to apply for a junior dev role. I received a call back later that day and they tried to sell me access to some course with the promise of a job afterwords. They gave me a website to visit to find more information.

I Googled the company and found that it was as I suspected a scam and that they had been praying on the jobless for sometime.

So, I played around on the site they told me to visit for a while and found a rather simple SQLI. I managed to pull the admin email/password (which they stored as plain text) the email address belonged to a Gmail account.

I tried the password for the Gmail account turns out the account belongs to the person running the scam. I find an email from the hosting account and you guessed it the password was the same.

I pulled the site down and replaced it with a picture of the person running the scam along with his name and the words "I'm a dirty scammer".

Then I sent all the info to the police (he'd been running a few others scams too) not sure what that lead to I didn't hear anything back.

I found this site (dev rant) when I Googled "React Native gets on my nerves" to see if anyone else felt the same way LOL!

I've legit just spent the past few days CRYING to get my react native app to compile on iOs using the xcodebuild command so that I can use a cloud build service (VS App Center). It works fine with XCode 'play' button but not through the command line. About to give up. Literally Googled 'fuck xcode' and found this, thank you guys, you made today a bit less dreary than what i was going to be. Reading through the posts actually made me laugh out loud.

Not really a rant, but here goes...
I want to personally thank each and every member of devRant! Here’s why. (First, a little boring backstory): I’m visually impaired, and stuck in quarantine like the rest of us. (Not totally blind, but y’all definitely DO NOT want me out on the roads driving,) I also work a Tech Support job which largely deals with macOS. Due to this eye condition, there simply isn’t a lot of shit to do while stuck in the house other than work and learn node.js. So my pastime has largely been to sit and read Facebook while not on the clock. One day, while working from home, I was so bored and pissed off, I googled “macOS fucking sucks” for fun, and found devRant! Your stories, jokes and rants have turned my life around! I’m no longer on Facebook. (I know, I know, but what’s a half-blind guy to do except read about COVID-19 and get more pissed off at the state of the world?) and you guys have inspired me to start learning new things and delve deeper into node, which I had put down for awhile (I’m at a kindergarten level anyway, brand new). Anyway, thanks again! I’ll refrain from asking stupid questions, I promise. But I need a TechSupportRant now...

A friend and a co-worker who prefers loneliness and interact only required.
Comes to office morning, connects to WiFi, looks at the mobile, keeps scrolling and laughs for an hour(quite in nature). This is what his been doing since month.
Curiosity among colleagues, we took his phone and found neither WhatsApp, nor Facebook and not even 9gag. His browser history had all dev problems googled..
Then, the day came, when we asked to him and the reply was...
DEVRANT(heard by all for the first time)..
Now many of us into devrant busy reading, ranting and laughing.
The outsiders unaware of such app might look at us think weird.. perspective and awareness matters..

I regret commenting on a WordPress blog using my full name. Although there was nothing stupid on what I wrote, I just hate it that I googled my name and it showed. I just want to delete my useless information / myself on the internet.

Never will this happen again.

Python is googled more than KIM KARDASHIAN in 2018 !

TL;DR; windows XP + bat scripts + fascination about being able to make things yourself.

I was born and raised in a village. And the thing about living in a village is that you are free :) Among all the other freedoms you are also free to build your own solutions to various domestic problems, i.e. to build stuff. This is one of the things that fascinates me about living outside the city.

When I finally was old enough (and had the means to, i.e. a computer) to understand that programming is something that allows you to build your own solutions to computer problems, it got to me.

With win 3.1 I was still too fresh and too young. With win 95 I was more interested in playing with neighbours outdoors. With win 98 I was a bit too busy at school. But with win XP the time had come. I started writing automation solutions for windows administration using .bat scripts (.vbs was and still is somewhat repelling to me). I no longer needed to browse Russian forums and torrent sites to find a solution to a problem I had! That was amazing!!! [esp. when my Russian was very weak].

That was the time when I built my first sort-of-malware - a bat script downloading and installing Radmin server, uploading computer's IP and admin credentials to my FTP.

I loved it!

However, I'd stumbled upon may obstacles when writing with batch. I googled a lot and most of the solutions I found were in bash (something related to Linux, which was a spooky mystery to me back then). Eventually, I got my courage together and installed ubuntu. Boy was I sorry... Nothing was working. I was unable to even boot the thing! Not to mention the GUI...

Years later I tried again with ubuntu [7.10 I think.. or 7.04] on my Pavilion. Took me a looooot of attempts but I got there. I could finally boot it. A couple of weeks later I managed to even start the GUI! I could finally learn bash and enjoy the spectacular Compiz effects (that cube was amazing).

I got into bash and Linux for the next several years. And then I thought to myself - wait, I'm writing scripts that automate other programs. Wouldn't it be cool I I could write my own programs that did exactly what I wanted and did not need automation? It definitely would! I could write a program that would make sound work (meaning no more ALSA/PA headaches!), make graphics work on my hardware, make my USB audio card to be set to primary once connected and all the other amazing things! No more automation -- just a single program or all of that!

little did the naive me knew :)

I started with python. I didn't like that syntax from the beginning :/ those indentations...

Then I tried java. Bucky (thenewboston), who likes tuna sandwiches, on my phone all the free time I had. I didn't learn anything :/ Even tried some java 101 e-book. Nothing helped until I decided to write some simple project (nothing fancy - just some calculations for a friend who was studying architecture).

I loved it! It sounds weird, but I found Swing amazing too. With that layout manager where you have to manually position all the components :)

and then things happened and I quit my med studies and switched to programming. Passed my school exams I was missing to enter the IT college and started inhaling every bit of info about IT I could get my hands on (incl outside the college ofc).

A few more stepping stones, a few more irrelevant jobs to pay my bills in the city, and I got to where I am now.

I googled - "What does refresh from windows right click menu do?"

I got a reply - "Search instead for why the hell it is there in first place"

I Googled "png to svg converter", this is the output of the first online tool I tried.

This dev literally just a base64 encoded copy of my origin image wrapped in an svg... the most infuriating thing about it is that technically it did 'convert' it to svg - just not in the way I had anticipated.

Whoever wrote this is a lazy genius (and a dickhead).

I am curious whether facebook IS listening to conversations or not.
Living with my girlfriend in a small appartment, yesterday we were talking about some shitty game we both played around 10 years ago, I was wondering whether the game still exists and googled on my phone (via LTE, not wifi) - yeah the game is still online and still the same shit.
Today she saw facebook sponsored ads to this game on HER facebook.

Today we watched a movie (Valerian and the thousands planets) - and there was this ship which looked similar to Millenium Falcon. I noted that in the midtime. After the movie - guess what - opened the facebook abd there was a sponsored ad to buy Millenium Falcon miniature or lego figure.

How? Randomized events? I do not think so. This was not the first time it happened.

Note: we are not native english speakers, maybe "millenium falcon" could be the only catch fb could achieve?

I loved Python from when I wrote my first program up to I googled "how to import a module from a parent directory".

My love lasted 30 seconds

The story of how I stumbled onto devrant:

Not long ago I was struggling with visual studio and did not know what to think, do or say. The only thing I wanted to do was scream while I banged my laptop against the wall. Just before doing that I googled "fuck Vs fuck Microsoft" and I was introduced to devrant. Something about reading the rqnts of frustrated developers made me calm (It also made me laugh). So what I really want to say is: thank you devrant for saving my money.

You know what would be nice? Being able to Google anything to do with VPNs without having like 90% of the results being links to how-to-setup-VPN-client pages from every goddamn obscure commercial VPN provider in existance.

If I wanted to know how to setup a VPN client to work with Crazy Dave's House-o'-VPN-n'-Cloud-Hosting's paid-for service, I probably would have Googled for that, not general things like "openvpn ethernet bridging". Why am I getting so many commercial results? Either nobody sets up their own VPNs, or the VPN companies have SEO'd the keywords good and proper.

So I wanted to spread a struct in another struct to fill fields with the value `None`. Not what I expected when I googled "Rust spread into"..

So reviewing another companies framework, colleague came across a 'banging tween' but didn't know what it was so googled turns out a tween is a person aged 9-14, he is now likely on many police watch lists. But he asks a couple of us on a Skype chat, one guy simply copies and pastes the definition of banging, I see his source says buffet is a synonym for 'bang' so I comment without thinking much:
"Would you like a bang? I certainly wouldn't use that sentence for would you like a buffet". Then I see the CTO typing I forgot he was in the chat and start to sweat oh s£#@ what have I done well I'm a gonna.
CTO: "'Me and my wife like a bang in the kitchen' seems alright to me". - made my day.

OK. This might sound incredibly stupid. But still...
I decided to help a friend of mine with asp.net assignment. I just know c# and he didn't attend classes. So he came to me with some pizza and beer. So we managed to finish the assignment. In the end we had to add audio to web page and I didn't know how to do it(I've never used Javascript until that moment) . So naturally I googled and tried literally 10 different methods to play audio and none of them worked. I lost my mind and hit the table a bunch of times. After 2 hours I realized that I was wearing my second headphone that is not connected to my laptop and audio is playing on my primary headphone as expected)

I work as a front end developer at a company. This site is using WordPress and I need a paid plugin, but I wanted to test the full version first without paying, so I googled it. Downloaded it and installed it right away.
NOTE I was working on the test server, where all other projects are placed in a subdirectory of public_html (public_html/websites/<other websites>), but instead on placing the website folder where are the others, I placed it in the parent directory (public_html), (where are some others folders and files). Everything goes fine, but a few days later, I wanted to modify something in functions.php of that theme and I noticed a strange code, base64 format, so I decrypted it and turns out it's a backdoor that puts code in other files of the theme, so it can add an Admin in the DB anytime, so it can remotely connect to the website. Because, as I said, the website was in the public_html directory, and the virus search for the other folders and files in the same directory and his children, it affected the rest of the websites (50+).
I reported that to my boss, but says it's fine and to give more attention next time and to install the website in the same directory as the others. Couldn't fix automatically and I had to remove manually in every website every file created and the lines that the virus added.

I'm a php developer.
I don't like preg functions (regular expressions) and i don't remember exactly the syntax for alternate words.
I googled, and this is what I found.

An heart attack.

So I installed Avast because I was downloading some torrents.
After months I suddenly hear a really loud "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden". I nearly got a heart attack. I thought I've got a fucking maleware shitty fuck thing, but I had no idea how I could find out where the fuck it was coming from. So I ignored it.

Then, weeks later again: "*ping* *ping* *ping* Eine Bedrohung wurde gefunden", while I was browsing the web.
I thought it was coming from a website so I looked through every tab and window. But nothing.
So I googled the exact sentence it said, and voila:
The first result was from the avast support site.

I opened avast and looked into the settings. There! A checkbox to turn it off! These fucking cock suckers enabled it by default!
It was the first time I enjoyed clicking a fucking checkbox. FUCK YOU AVAST!!!

Why is AntiVirus Software so shitty these days... I'll probably just switch to Windows Defender.

My prederred method of communication is over email.

A guy I've built an ecommerce platform and affiliate tracking for was sending me a lot of IMs. So I disabled Google chat. Then he started sending me texts to let me know he sent WhatsApp messages.

Last week he sent me a text to let me know to check WhatsApp. The message there was extremely vague and a minute later an actual email came in explaining the actual issue.

He's fucking with me right?

Then yesterday he messaged me a random series of questions, some that could have easily been googled, that on a holiday while I'm out with my family, should have definitely been over email, because they weren't immediate issues. I actually pictured him drinking at a bbq when he was writing them.

I was about to quit this dude but I get some nice monthly bonuses.

RANT:
Google is just a steaming pile of shit!!

I've recently installed LineageOS onto my phone and wanted to degooglify my life.

So my current Smartphone doesn't have any GApps installed and I get along fairly well.

Should I need anything, I should just be able to use it in my browser right?
RIGHT?

Nono!! As soon as I want to log into a third party Service using Google (older acccounts with the other choice only being Facebook) I need to "verify my identity". And the only option are my old smartphone who still have Gapps on it but are slow and don't accessible when I'm away!

For those who say: "Google is just beeing secure. They don't want anyone to steal your account.". I USE 2FA AND HAVE BACKUP CODES.
BEFORE DEGOOGLING MY DEVICE IT NEVER ASKED SUCH A THING!!! WHAT A PILE OF SPYING SHIT!!!

And the best part, after I remotely started my PC at home and just want to take a screenshot of the message for this post before just using a working session, the message didn't appear.
Somehow google decided that me logging in 15 mins later (same ip) proves my identity?!?!?!

IF THIS CAN BE ATTRIBUTED TO AI. FUCK THIS SHIT. GOOGLED SHOULD BE TREATED LIKE AN ONLINE CASINO BECAUSE THE CHANCE OF JUST GETTING LOGGED SEEMS COMPLETELY RANDOM!!!

(I also had this prior when using my smartphone browser. There I couldn't "circumvent" this and I was at home. But having this shit on my browser which should've a session is unacceptable.)

! rant

Sorry but I'm really, really angry about this.

I'm an undergrad student in the United States at a small state college. My CS department is kinda small but most of the professors are very passionate about not only CS but education and being caring mentors. All except for one.

Dr. John (fake name, of course) did not study in the US. Most professors in my department didn't. But this man is a complete and utter a****le. His first semester teaching was my first semester at the school. I knew more about basic programming than he did. There were more than one occasion where I went "prof, I was taught that x was actually x because x. Is that wrong?" knowing that what I was posing was actually the right answer. Googled to verify first. He said that my old teachings were all wrong and that everything he said was the correct information. I called BS on that, waited until after class to be polite, and showed him that I was actually correct. Denied it.

His accent was also really problematic. I'm not one of those people who feel that a good teacher needs a native accent by any standard (literally only 1 prof in the whole department doesn't), but his English was *awful*. He couldn't lecture for his life and me, a straight A student in high school, was almost bored to sleep on more than one occasion. Several others actually did fall asleep. This... wasn't a good first impression.

It got worse. Much, much worse.

I got away with not having John for another semester before the bees were buzzing again. Operating systems was the second most poorly taught class I've ever been in. Dr John hadn't gotten any better. He'd gotten worse. In my first semester he was still receptive when you asked for help, was polite about explaining things, and was generally a decent guy. This didn't last. In operating systems, his replies to people asking for help became slightly more hostile. He wouldn't answer questions with much useful information and started saying "it's in chapter x of the textbook, go take a look". I mean, sure, I can read the textbook again and many of us did, but the textbook became a default answer to everything. Sometimes it wasn't worth asking. His homework assignments because more and more confusing, irrelavent to the course material, or just downright strange. We weren't allowed to use muxes. Only semaphores? It just didn't make much sense since we didn't need multiple threads in a critical zone at any time. Lastly for that class, the lectures were absolutely useless. I understood the material more if I didn't pay attention at all and taught myself what I needed to know. Usually the class was nothing more than doing other coursework, and I wasn't alone on this. It was the general consensus. I was so happy to be done with prof John.

Until AI was listed as taught by "staff", I rolled the dice, and it came up snake eyes.

AI was the worst course I've ever been in. Our first project was converting old python 2 code to 3 and replicating the solution the professor wanted. I, no matter how much debugging I did, could never get his answer. Thankfully, he had been lazy and just grabbed some code off stack overflow from an old commit, the output and test data from the repo, and said it was an assignment. Me, being the sneaky piece of garbage I am, knew that py2to3 was a thing, and used that for most of the conversion. Then the edits we needed to make came into play for the assignment, but it wasn't all that bad. Just some CSP and backtracking. Until I couldn't replicate the answer at all. I tried over and over and *over*, trying to figure out what I was doing wrong and could find Nothing. Eventually I smartened up, found the source on github, and copy pasted the solution. And... it matched mine? Now I was seriously confused, so I ran the test data on the official solution code from github. Well what do you know? My solution is right.

So now what? Well I went on a scavenger hunt to determine why. Turns out it was a shift in the way streaming happens for some data structures in py2 vs py3, and he never tested the code. He refused to accept my answer, so I made a lovely document proving I was right using the repo. Got a 100. lol.

Lectures were just plain useless. He asked us to solve multivar calculus problems that no one had seen and of course no one did it. He wasted 2 months on MDP. I'd continue but I'm running out of characters.

And now for the kicker. He becomes an a**hole, telling my friends doing research that they are terrible programmers, will never get anywhere doing this, etc. People were *crying* and the guy kept hammering the nail deeper for code that was honestly very good because "his was better". He treats women like delicate objects and its disgusting. YOU MADE MY FRIEND CRY, GAVE HER A BOX OF TISSUES, AND THEN JUST CONTINUED.

Want to know why we have issues with women in CS? People like this a****le. Don't be prof John. Encourage, inspire, and don't suck. I hope he's fired for discrimination.

So after someone mentioned Haskell in a post, I googled it and started some kind of tutorial.
It's fun!

I started programing when I almost failed at some IT class 7 years ago when I was 16 in high school. So I started googling how to do basic stuff in java (if, for, while,... ) and I just fall in love with it 😊 I still remember how I wanted to make a button in Java so I googled: how to button in java 😂
Here I am still in love with it and I think I will always have this need to learn new programming languages, technologies, frameworks,... 😊🤓

"damn bro, you made that? how can i get into coding?"

shut the fuck up. you can get into programming like anyone who wants to can. by googling how to code. it's not the question itself that bothers me, it's the fact that if you actually wanted to code so bad, you already would've googled it. stop projecting your lack of passion on me.

this is most common with programming, but it happens so often with so many other things.

if you want to learn about biology and chemistry, there's free courses online and papers from nih.

if you want to learn about forsenics read a book about it and read about cases and how they were solved.

i could go on and on. the internet gives you access to so much that if you actually wanted to learn something, you would've already have.

I now make it my personal crusade to rate up unfairly rated down questions in stackoverflow. I don't give a shit if it's a duplicate, or can easily be googled, or how fucking basic the question is. If the user made an effort to post their question, I'm going to rate it back up because fuck off you sperging retards.

I had to remove the inherited elements of a div element in jQuery so I googled "kill children".

took me a while to understand ...

I googled "scrum sucks" and now I can see a pattern described as an argument against the whole scrum/agile/whatever thing, which is already happening since we started adopting agile: we're consciously incurring technical debt and being allowed to create a mess out of the previously existing code architecture just to "get this ticket out of the way"

We're also refraining from acting immediately on negative user feedback on a feature just released, which I think can wear user perception of the company as a whole, all because it's "not the focus" of the current sprint

>Wanted to become a hacker because I thought it was cool and fun
>Googled how to become a hacker
>Read a lot of articles
>Talked about it with nerdy friends who ended up helping me with a few resources
>Found Hack Forums
>Stayed on Hack Forums for a while and learnt a lot about malware and hacking and realized I needed to learn how to code to build my own hacking programs
>Got a book from a friend (It was a dev book based on basic)
>Got fascinated with programming and quickly moved on to C++
>Got frustrated with C++ and quit programming for months
>Got introduced to VB.Net and I finally could write codes and development a lot of applications, mainly malware creators and crypters as they were called on HE
>Quit HF and hacking and got into coding seriously and learnt web dev , then java and developing android apps and I have been happy since.

TL;DR C# has changed quite a bit since the last time I used it.

So I'm working on a personal project, it's written in C#. When I needed to run a task on a separate thread. It has been years since the last time I worked with C#, so I googled it.

Me: "Async? Await? Task? This looks pretty fucking useful. When was this added?"

*Googles a bit*
Return .NET 4.5 in 2012. Current version 4.7.1.

Me: "What?! Last time I checked they were still in .NET 4. Shit!"

I've got a bit of catching up to do.

Oldschool ranters from 2005 (if you're even still here), how was DevRant back in the day? What was the differences/similarities? Was it better/worse? How did you discover DevRant (before you googled it)?

Okay. I’m upset. So the recent .NET update Microsoft put out fried SharePoint which I am currently the main point of contact for at our company. In addition, my only current projects are creating workflows.

I was publishing a workflow and got an error. I googled the error and found that it was the .NET update that caused it. Internet says to edit the web.config file for your web apps and it will be good to go. I go to our networks guy (only available supervisor) and explain what happened and ask about the recent patch and whether this could be the cause. He says that his team doesn’t actually handle the patches so I should speak with the HelpDesk lead (don’t ask).

I go to the HelpDesk lead and explain the situation, explain the solution and ask for what to do next. Keep in mind that this whole thing takes two hours because it’s Friday and everyone is out and I can’t do any of my work while I’m waiting on this. HelpDesk lead says “you have an admin account, I trust you. Go fix it” so I think uh okay.... I’m a junior and not even technically an IT person but sure. I know how to do it - but got nervous about fucking it up because our entire organization uses Sharepoint.

Nevertheless I go to my desk and look for the root directories and find that they’re on a server somewhere that I have no access to. I message the Helpdesk guy and tell him this and he says to talk to the developer supervisor. Great! He’s super nice and helpful and will totally understand! Only he’s not in. Neither is half of his team.

I go to his team and look around and find nobody but realize I may be able to catch one of the guys I know and work with in the break room. I start leaving and am stopped by a developer who is generally nice and funny. I explain the situation and he says “you... YOU need to edit a config file?” And scoffs. He demands to see what I’m talking about.

I walk him to my machine and show him what’s going on and all the research I did. I start to realize he thinks I’m overstepping and I begin to apologize and explain the details to why I was asked to do it and then I say “I really shouldn’t even be the one doing this” he says “no you should not. This isn’t getting done today. Put in a request, include your research and we will see what we can do when the supervisor gets back next week”

His tone was like I was in trouble and I know that I’m not, but it’s my goal to end up on that team and I just feel like shit about this whole situation. To top it off my boss pulled me off of two projects because of unrelated issues (and nothing to do with me) so I have basically nothing to do and I just feel very discouraged. I feel dumb and like I should have gone to the developers first. I just wanted to make it easy on everyone and do my research. I feel like I keep being put in situations above my level (I’m one of two juniors in a 16 person shop, the other one is an intern) and then “getting in trouble” for working beyond my scope.

Anyways.... fuck Microsoft

I got scammed for $600.

Its not the scam that pissed me off. Its my ego as an engineer that blinded me.

It was last year during crypto nft ups and downs.

Its called a frontrunner scam.

From what I remember, I followed this tutorial on YouTube to setup this bot on remix ethereum compiler.

I read all the code and couldn't find anything fishy.

So I figured, all the comments are hyping it, fuk it, $600. Let's see how it goes, I can take out my money if it flops.

And this fuking contract wouldn't show any updates on Etherscan

The guy in the video mentioned you may need to wait a while.

Plus he sounded like an honest guy.

I googled it after I fuking put my money in and followed the tutorial.

And a video explains the scam.

Theres a file filled with comments to throw you off. But hidden in the comments is some code to change the wallet the crypto goes to.

Fuking wrekt. Rookie mistake.

I went to the hackers telegram group and told them I'd report them, he said you gota put in more money for it to work.

Realized I'm being trolled, I rage quit and never told a soul.

Install 18.04 they said. It will be fine they said...
Well.
Apperently it hates my intel graphics card. It was giving me artifacts already during installation. It didnt boot after installation and got stuck on a purple screen with the mouse on it.
Got past that with recovery mode. Googled the solution snd they said "move mouse while booting" yeah that doesn't help.
It also didn't recognize the other monitors connected to it and since it comes without unity now everything was not where I'm used to look for it.
3 hours of grub mangleing, driver installing and a unity installation later, it finally works.
Installed terminator and oh, look, one of the most used short cuts is overwritten by some emoji pick bs.
Ffs.
Longest ubuntu installtion ever and it almost fked up the 16.04 aswell which is in dual boot atm.
And before someone says use Arch: ubuntu is a project requirement and Arch is not supported by the tools we need to use.

I was setting up a small home server running CentOS to my closet and was fighting with a USB Wifi adapter that wouldn't stay "awake". Googled the error messages and nothing...

Decided to about it on the CentOS forums and mentioned (MENTIONED, WASNT THE POINT) CWP (CentOS WebPanel) in my question, an admin came, COMMENTED A LINK TO A FORUM POST THAT TOLD "CWP IS NO WAY LINKED TO CENTOS" AND CLOSED THE QUESTION!
FUUUCKKKKK, i wanted to hit something sooo hard. The admin basically turned my point from A to X.

Last night me and my friend were on a WhatsApp call discussing how we should practice algorithms and data structures more. We texted the logistics after and he sent me a calendar invite on google. I swear to god this morning I had adds talking about data algorithms all over YouTube but I have never googled this issue in the near past 🤔 this can’t be a coincidence...

I've just opened LinkedIn (I don't know why) and I found an hilarious job offered in the home page: they are searching a JUNIOR programmer (for an internship) having experience in RPG IV programming language and OS/400. I never heard of that so I googled it and... LMAO.

goto

Found it lying around. Googled it, and it seems people avoid it, so I started using it all over the place(s). goto b

a:
no other places to goto exit

b:
Yes, it does require some thought to avoid confusion, and some pull requests get declined, but... Helps me alot when I have goto a

:exit

Used a general technical word as a name for a group project.

And that ignorant bitch googled and copy pasted the definition of that term to describe the project in documentation.

My friend asked me how to root his phone because I'm the computer guy, of course.

I didn't want to be a douche to him so I googled and directed him to a few pages that may help. He kept asking questions regarding rooting until it worked for him and it was all fine by me.

His last question though was how much it cost to replace the broken screen on his tablet!!

I'm really not sure. When I was 7-8 years old, I liked to view source in IE, then I somehow managed to use Javascript in the browser. First only some dumb opening of windows. And I liked Batch, so I made some files for copying, backup and stuff.

Then I got to PHP during the years from some online tutorial about making dynamic websites. My website was more static than stone, but yeah, I did page loading with PHP! Awful experience anyway, because I had to install Xampp, get it work and other stuff. 11 years old or so. (and I used Xampp only as a fileserver between laptop and desktop later, because.. PHP4... just no.)

As 12 years old or so I experienced my first World of Warcraft (vanilla) on a custom server in an internet cafe and I thought it's a singleplayer game. When I found out that no, I googled how to make my own server (hated multiplayer back then and loved good games with huge storylines). Failed miserably with ManGOS, got something to work with ArcEMU. There I learned some C++ basic stuff, which I hoped would helped me to fix some bugs. When I opened the code I was like: "Suuure." and left it like that. I learned what a MySQL database is, broke it like four times when I forgot WHERE and still rather played with websites i.e. html, css, js and optionally php when I wanted to repair a webpage for the server. With a friend we managed to get the server work via Hamachi, was fun, the server died too soon. Then I got ManGOS to work, but there wasn't really any interest to make a server anymore, just singleplayer for the lore. (big warcraft fan, don't kick me :D )

I think it was when I was 13y.o. I went to Delphi/Pascal course, which I liked a lot from the beginning, even managed to use my code on old Knoppix via Lazarus(Pascal). At this age I really liked thoae Flash games which were still common to see everywhere. So I downloaded .swfs, opened and tried to understand it. Managed to pull some stuff from it and rewrite in Pascal. Nope, never again that crap.

About the same time I got to Flash files I discovered Java. It was kind of popular back then, so I thought let's give it a try. I liked Flash more. Seriously. I've never seen so much repetitiveness and stupid styling of a code. I had either IDE for compiling C++ or Pascal or notepad! You think I wanted my code kicked all over the place in multiple folders and files? No.

So back to Pascal. I made some apps for my old hobby, was quite satisfied with the result (quiz like app), but it still wasn't the thing. And I really thought I'd like to study CS.

I started to love PHP because of phpBB forums I worked on as 15 y.o. I guess. At the same time I think there was an optional subject at school, again with Pascal. I hated the subject, teacher spoke some kind of gibberish I didn't really understand back then at all and now I find it only as a really stupid explanation of loops and strings.

So I started to hate Pascal subject, but not really the lang itself. Still I wanted something simpler and more portable. Then I got to Python as hm, 17y.o. I think and at the same time to C++ with DevC++. That was time when I was still deciding which lang to choose as my main one (still playing with website, database and js).

Then I decided that learning language from some teacher in a class seriously pisses me off and I don't want to experience it again. I choose Python, but still made some little scripts in C++, which is funny, because Python was considered only as a scripting lang back then.

I haven't really find a cross-platform framework for C++, which would: a) be easy to install b) not require VisualStudio PayForMe 20xy c) have nice license if I managed to make something nice and distribute it. I found Unity3D though, so I played with Blender for models, Audacity for music and C# for code. Only beautiful memories with Unity. I still haven't thought I'm a programmer back then.

For Python however I found Kivy and I was playing with it on a phone for about a year. Still I haven't really know what to do back then, so I thought... I like math, numbers, coding, but I want to avoid studying physics. Economics here I go!

Now I'm in my third year at Uni, should be writing thesis, study hard and what I do? Code like never before, contribute, work on a 3D tutorial and play with Blender. Still I don't really think about myself as a programmer, rather hobby-coder.

So, to answer the question: how did I learn to program? Bashing to shit until it behaved like I desired i.e. try-fail learning. I wouldn't choose a different path.

So what say guys, switch to linux forever, and bye bye windows?.

Or is there anything i should know before i do this?.
Things i cannot do in linux?

Googled a lot, still confused.Help?
(Using Arch, seems all fine)

For hours I spent my time debugging my code, trying different approach to the same code function. Looking for one simple invisible mistake, that is when I want to make a delete request to the IndexedDB.

The request are fine without running a single error, the success event fires perfectly. But one thing which is unexpected, the object inside IndexedDB did not vanish at all. The data stay the same without any flaws (but how can that be, when the 'delete success' event fired? IT SHOULD BE GONE BY NOW!). No kidding, for hours I debug my code, yet found nothing's wrong!

Until one moment I found out the datatype of key I gave the request are different from the object I wanted to delete, the object has a key of 4 and I gave the request "4". I'm so pissed at this moment making me googled 'developer rant' and found this site.
Really! God Bless 1 !== '1'.

Grew up with just my brother and mother in Russia. We had very little money so we haven't even seen computers in real life until my mother found a swedish boyfriend and we moved to Sweden the year 2000.

I was 7 years old at the time and I saw my first computer in what I think was the Swedish Migration Board office. The purpose of the computer was for convenient registration for the reception or something, but the first thing I did was found paint and drew some circles, I was completely mind blown!
My mother's boyfriend came and told me not to play with the computer because "I might accidentally install a virus".

A couple of months later we got a PC to share with the whole family, me and my brother were so ecstatic because we have previously only seen them on TV and now for some reason we have one at home "Woooot 😮😮😀"

The problem was that my mother only let me and my brother use the computer on weekends and only for one hour. Somehow this just made me and my brother even more interested in that machine, so we sneaked out from our room at night and played with it.
One night we found out about this great thing called Google and googled "how to program a program" and that's when we fell in love with programming.

When our mother found out she got very angry and disappointed. She was questioning why we were "so much in love with this stupid thing" and said "it's not like you are going to get a job working with it!"

Me and my brother are both devs now. So suck it 🖕🖕🖕

Some birds told me Galaxy S9 is really good.
Googled it, and found something more interesting.
PS: this is the 3rd largest mobile server provider in NZ
Use development code in production.
Distructed certificate.
Nice work guys!

So my friend who's learning to program didn't really feel like he accomplished much in a uni assignment since he googled most stuff, copy-pasted and tweaked the code a bit. When I told him that's actually the way we do things he found it the funniest thing ever.

Looking for next book to read:

*Googled "Mythical Man Moth"
*Realized that it auto corrected to "Mythical Man-Month"

Ever since I heard of the book I pondered what the hell the title could mean, thinking about analogies of devs to moths...

I've never felt so stupid and disappointed at the same time.

I'm just finishing my bachelor's degree in computer science in Germany. I love programming, especially for Android. I am working on a really cool note-taking app for my bachelor thesis and I love. A few weeks ago I started looking for jobs, I thought this would be easy. Why is this not easy?! Does no company need help with developing an app?!?! I googled jobs and opened the first few pages on the browser then I chose a city in Switzerland because I read that's where developers make the most money. Then I had to write a CV, what the fuck am I supposed to write in the CV?! So I wrote what languages I had dealt with during my studies and I wrote that I now speak German English and Hebrew. I had to upload the CV for EVERY SINGLE COMPANY and sometimes I had to write a cover letter for a companies I don't even know much about. WHY IS THIS SO ANNOYING!!!
I'm the last few weeks I've been getting emails rejecting my application, such a waste of time. I would love to work with people I'm just so bored sitting at home all day without much motivation to program alone, I need company and a company to pay me. I've already wasted a few months and I just can't believe that the market is so terribly organised. I could be getting so much work done, all I need is people who are a little bit motivated! I'm just so frustrated that everything works so slowly in this market...I even tried looking online for people who just want to talk about programming Android apps, NADA I just couldn't find anything... Well that's it if you have a job offer for me just hit me up I'll do anything...tiny.cc/chagai is where you can find my contact information I will literally consider even working in North Korea I just don't care where I work..

How did you know about devRant?

My answer: I googled 'stores for programmers' then this came up

Why exacly PHP contains "T_PAAMAYIM_NEKUDOTAYIM".

Yes, I googled what that is, I understand message, yet still it strikes me if PHP creator was high that night and later figured T_THE_DOUBLE_COLON_THING_OF_MAGICK is not what he aims for and out of wtf'ness temporarly forgotten english?

And what is your theory on that

I googled it. I searched for banana then then banana shown in the results and then I searched for apple and and and what happened to you google?? where is apple??
Google don't know apple :D

Hey guys, this is my first rant. I like this friendly community very much so far and hope it stays that way. So here it goes...

I have this Trello app on my Android phone. It has this nice feature - calendar... But week starts on Sunday. So I started investigating, how I could change it to Monday. Googled and found that you have to change the language, which I did. Now I wish I had this nice ISO date format yyyy-MM-dd, but this motherfrakker doesn't allow me to!

How much I hate this little piece of shit! What does he want from me? Download the sources, add the functionality, compile for a week and flash it into my Xiaomi?!

I just googled 'how to organize home'. I am not quite sure what I expected.

I had a problem - X

I googled, problem -X

Google - npm install --save X

Problem solved

Oh fucking hardware virtualization.
how many times have I failed at setting sth up googled it and just read "check your BIOS ... and enable..."
Well I would IF I FUCKING COULD. THERE AIN'T NOTHING TO ENABLE ON THIS CHEAP CPU.

I know. I know. Should just get a newer setup, this lappy ain't that powerful anyways - but still - it's frustrating to get excited, start sth and than hit that dead end realizing they presupposed sth I don't have.

Hey Guys
Linux VPS + Apache2 + https
I'm a noob in Linux, got my VPS live, but I'm serving http... Even if my page doesn't save even cookies It will marked as unsecure.
Is it possible to config Apache2 to serve https?
Thank you
PS.: Googled and got nothing special, only info about Apache2

First year of college. We had to write a program in assembly to let lights go on and off slowly but I couldn't get it to work and googled the shit out of it trying to get it to work to no avail. So I go to the teacher as I expected him to have a bit more documentation/knowledge on how the shit worked. He literally said oh let me google that for you. Which made me go 🤦‍♂️. In the end I never figured out how to get the lights on or off but luckily my team mates did a good enough job to get us passed in the class.

FUCK YOUUU GERRIT, YOU CAN SUCK MY BALLS, YOU'RE JUST A BOOTLEGGED VERSION OF GITHUB BECAUSE GOOGLED WANTED TO MAKE SOME $$, SING ALONG ERRBODY

Just got an internship a few days ago. The manager threw a project at me. I have to do it alone. It's a user-system (registration, login etc.) The front-end is ready. And I have to build its back-end in PHP. I started to draw the project on paper (pseudocode) and then asked a few questions about design patterns to jump into coding. They recommended me Laravel. I'm good at PHP (procedural) and have done some basic OOP. I've actually built a few projects in Python using OOP. But I've never used any framework (yeah, I know). So I started to learn Laravel and realized that it's very different than normal PHP (procedural or even normal OOP). I almost don't write any normal PHP code. This makes me confused. But I have to learn it fast and well, and finish the project to hit the deadline and get the full-time job. I'm desperately looking for any kind of help to learn Laravel more effectively! I've googled and got some recommendations. But I need more live help from devs directly.

Simple ANTLR project for compiler class accepted .

Easy money
(btw I had no idea about what antlr was , so i googled everything :D)

I use Google for anything I don't know ,
Does that mean I'm a bad programmer?
If so , if I memorize everything I googled once , will I be a good programmer ?
How do good programmers find the solution? Do they try everything ? Kinda brute force ?

So I had this awesome idea yesterday, and I was really in to it and all, so before I started working on it I googled some stuff, and while looking for something (how do you generate session cookies) I just found out that somebody did EXACTLY what I wanted to do. Now I'm sad.

Today I sat with my manager wanting to show him the analytics.
I started typing the address and the chrome prediction went up so I pressed enter.
Unfortunately I typed only the first four letters and the prediction disappeared so I googled something totally different 😫

Didn’t shower. Didn’t fix my hair. Wasn’t asked a hundred questions that could have been easily Googled. Got to chill with my one-year-old while waiting for Magento 2 to reindex. Lovin’ it.

I googled "DIY pc case luggable." Anyone see anything strange?

Run test
everything ok
Run again
everything ok
Run again
error
Run again
everything ok

*wtaf is happening?*
I googled for the cause of a "double callback" error and found out that supertest was throwing it when I was attaching a file to the API request. found no conclusive way to solve it, just that "supertest does it from time to time".

Trying to investigate further, I made a function to repeat the API request 5 times in a row. Everything passed. The run it again. Two failed. Again and everything passed.

this is bullshit

fml

Man I hate programming tests that have no practical application. I'm not doing one yet, just saw an example question that made me go...ok...I kinda get what you want but..why would you EVER need this. Googled and the consensus is that..*drum roll* you wouldn't ever need it because it's only useful to see if someone can solve it in an interview.

Why not give actual problems or at least actual test cases of things that way you can see if people can solve actual real life problems. Wouldn't that prove that people can reason their way through things or not? See if they can provide a good solution for something that someone else has already encountered instead of some nonsense that wouldn't have an actual practical application?

Maybe it's just me but if you give me a problem that sounds like it's useless for some reason my brain just goes, "Ah this sounds like it's useless, better not actually devote all my brain power to this"...

I had a small .NET PoC project I wanted to upload to our git server. So added the project to version control using Visual Studio, meaning that VS created a local repository for it. Then I wanted to push it to the remote repository which were created by my colleague. This one was initialized with a commit (.gitignore and Readme.md), so I couldn't push directly. Googled a bit, OK then tried to fetch the remote repo, didn't help. Googled again, tried some "git push origin master whatever" stuff and then rebate, because nothing seemed to help.
OOPS where are my local files? WTF? 😣

Long story short: Experience in other version control systems is not enough or even dangerous when switching over to git. 😂

!rant but a question
Anyone has a dumb/plain explanation of these?

I was like WTF is that when I discovered those options.. I googled and it's connected to arabic language.. but I cannot find any explanations what each of those options do..

So if anyone know and has the time and patience to clarify, please do! Thanks in advance!

Looking at an old Java project, running java 1.6, test folder doesn't even exist and the "old but gold" java.utils.Date class is used throughout the whole thing. How do I initialise a new date again...? I actually just googled that :D At least the constructor parameters are named nicely... wait.. what...

I wanted to suggest a functionality (keyboard shortcut) to a website. I see that their feedback button was pretty visible, which is weird because most websites I've visited first take you through 3 layers of "have you googled your question first?" before they let you send a question or feedback. Alas, I fell into the trap. First they asked me for the typical intrusive demographic info, and then they asked me marketing questions, and then... that's it. They didn't let me submit any feedback. They just took my info and left. great

When this guy started asking me a bunch of googled questions such as:
Why should I hire you?
Why do you want this job?
What do you know about the company?
Describe your biggest fear?
What's your biggest strength/weakness ?
Dood pls

I’d been working event based and freelance jobs in the security and entertainment fields for years, with odd stints as a bartender sprinkled in. My pay was mostly decent, but I had no job security, and I was more on the road than at home. A few years before this job search experience I had already realised I can’t continue on this path for ever, especially if I ever want a serious relationship (e.g. 16 weeks straight touring Europe with on avg. 16h work days pretty much every day isn’t ideal in that regard, and also really though on both body and mind). So I decided to study. As I applied in autumn, not every line of study accepted students. The closest to my interest I found was BBA in Business IT.

Fast forward 1,5 years. After moving away from my previous base due to then-gfs studies, I had also been able to accept less work. Well, there were really two reasons: I didn’t want to go on weeks long big tours anymore, and I’d had to price up on my freelance job due to reasons. I still managed to keep our household going, but not knowing when the next paycheck would be available was becoming a little too stressful. I wanted job security. So a few weeks after my wedding I scoured the internetz for positions I could apply to, and applied to a dozen or so places. They were a variety of positions I had a vague understanding of from what I’d learned at UAS: from sales to data analytics to dev… I was aware pretty much all of the applications were a long shot by best, so I expected to be ghosted…

Two of the organizations I applied to wanted to go forward with me. Both dev jobs. I can’t even remember the specifics of the other one anymore, but I do remember the interview: I got in to their office (which was ridiculously open), and got marched into a tiny conference room. The interviewer was passive-aggressive and really bombarded me with questions, not really leaving a socially awkward introvert with any time to answer. I started to get really anxious and twitchy, sweating like a pig. Just wanted out. But nooo, they wanted me to do a coding test live. So they sat me on a computer with Eclipse open, gave me an assignment and told me not to use the internet. What’s even worse is that I could literally feel the interviewer breathing down my neck when I tried to do the test. Well, didn’t happen cause I was under so much pressure that I couldn’t think at all… yeah, that was horrible.

Anyhow, the other position I really applied to because it was in my hometown and I recognised the company name from legendary commercials from the 90s - everyone in this country who watched TV in mid-to-late 90s remembers those. Anyway, to my surprise, my present day manager contacted me and wanted me to do a coding test. At the time he asked I was having a bout of fevers after fevers, not really able to get healthy. I told him that I’d do it as soon as I’m healthy. A month went by, maybe more. He asked again. Again I replied that as soon as I get healthy, but promised to do it next week the latest. I didn’t deliver on that, but the next week after that, even if I was the most feverish I had been, I did the tests. I could only finish half of them, cause I couldn’t look at a screen for long at a time and had to visit the loo every 10min or so, but apparently that was enough. Next week I was already going to the interview… oh I also googled what is PHP on the way there, since it was mentioned as a requirement and I had no idea what it was. Imagine that…

The interview itself couldn’t have been more different from the other one. We were sitting in a nice conference room with my manager and the product’s lead dev, drinking coffee, our feet on the table and talking smack. Oh, and we did play a game of NHL<insertNumber> on PS4 during the interview… it was relaxed. Of course the more serious chat was there, too, but I can only really remember how relaxed it was. When I left the interview, I had been promised the position and that I would be sent the contract to be signed as soon as the CEO had reviewed and approved it. Next day, I had signed it and some time later I started at my current job (I gave a date when I was available to start, since there was a tour still agreed upon between the interview and the start).

Oh, and the job’s pretty much like the interview. Relaxed. It’s a good place to be in, even though the pay could be better (I regularly get offers for junior positions with more pay, and mid level positions with double the pay). I do value a pleasant working environment and the absence of stress more than big munny, what can I say?

So guys you all remember or know or will know how it is to be a student. Not that much money around, have to be responsible for the first time of your life and I don't know since we're all programmers here our Desktop/laptop that we invested our money on for the university is our life.

Recently I have found out that something is up with my laptop. My Ram should have been 8GB but it shows only 4. I almost fainted, I thought the seller caught an idiot (me) and sold it like that. So I decide, for some reason, to buy 2x8gb ram so I can have 16 since its the max support of the system.
I open the laptop and what to see but my laptop had 2x4gb in there.

Regardless I installed the new ones to find out what else but my PC is now showing just 8gb.

"Calm down Nick" I said maybe GPU uses it but no it only shows 4gb ram, the same amount the laptop came with so I guess it's integrated.

So now I can only think that the problem is occurred because my Father, dropped the laptop when I specifically told him to not have it in dangerous high places. I Googled around but everyone is talking just swaping the ram chips well yeah I did that 100 times, still the same.

Tl;Dr I'm freaking out because theres something up with my laptop

When your client doesn't understand all the developer terms they googled.

Past week our Neural Network professor told us after the lecture that the colllege is taking steps for investing in Nvidia Digits DevBox. At first i didnt knw what it is. I googled it and came to knw that it is a fucking beast! Those specs man!!!
Its nice to see that your institute is taking steps to bring latest technology for students.

Trying to learn c and I forgot the name of the string comparison function, so I googled "c string"

O boi....

Intel drivers suck!

For months since I've gotten this work loaner PC it has been randomly crashing. Lately I noticed it is only when watching videos or listening to music. Googled the issue and found one other person with a similar issue who uninstalled the drivers. Now the thing runs fine! F.lux isn't the happiest but it still works.

I want to create multiple entries on a worklist with one message in one of the systems we work with.

I googled the issue and miraculously found link about precisely this issue...

It was a mailing list... with my messages... last message: "thanks, i managed to figure it all out"...

And no details...
Well, fuck me...

Just started to do something. Then i came accross a problem and googled "How to concentrate strings in C" Found sprintf and strcat, could concentrate strings. And this just with every problem.

I work with statistics/data analysis and web development. I study these subjects for almost a decade and now I have 4 years of practical experience.

This information is on my LinkedIn profile and from time to time tech recruiters contact me wanting to have an interview. I always accept because I find it a great way to practice interviews and talking in English, as it isn't my native language.

A remark that I always make to my colleagues wanting to start doing data analysis related work is that it may seem similar to development, but it's not. When you develop, your code work or not. It may be ugly, it may be full of security problems, but you almost always have a clear indication if things are functioning. It's possible to more or less correlate experience using a programming language with knowing how to develop.

Data science is different. You have to know what you are doing because the code will run even if you are doing something totally wrong. You have to know how to interpret the results and judge if they make sense. For this the mathematics and theory behind is as important as the programming language you use.

Ok, so I go to my first interview for a data science position. Then I discover that I will be interview by... a psychologist. A particularly old one. Yeah. Great start.

She proceeds to go through the most boring checklist of questions I ever saw. The first one? "Do you know Python?". At this point I'm questioning myself why I agreed to be interviewed. A few minutes later, a super cringy one: "Can you tell me an example of your amazing analytics skills?". I then proceed to explain what I wrote in the last two paragraphs to her. At this point is clear that she has no idea of what data science is and the company probably googled what they should expect from a candidate.

20 minutes later and the interview is over. A few days later I receive an email saying that I was not selected to continue with the recruitment process because I don't have enough experience.

In summary: an old psychologist with no idea on how data science works says I don't have experience on the subject based on a checklist that they probably google. The interview lasted less than 30 minutes.

Two weeks later another company interviews me, I gave basically the same answers and they absolutely liked what they heard. Since that day I stopped trying to understand what is expected from you on interviews.

My dad saw an HP computer with wireless printer on HSN (Home Shopping Network). I was on the point of ordering it. I looked at their privacy notice wh. pretty much says we're going to know wh. porn you watch, with whom and when. Then we're going to sell the info. to everybody who might use it against you. Fuck that. Then I googled reviews of this outfit. Then it finally hit me: you don't order computers from home shopping networks. I'm glad it occurred to me before taking the plunge. They pull this shite telling you how much cheaper they're selling it for as opposed to retail, wh. is a complete lie because they jack up the retail price to make their selling price look cheap.

I was talking to my non tech friend, one friend of her who is working at one big kind of MNC (Mobile network companies) asked me what do you use in VFox.

I have no fucking idea what's VFox. I said I have no idea what is, we don't use it. He immediately asked me what technologies you guys are using (I am working in a startup)?

I said we are using Ruby, Ruby On Rails and Python, Djanho. He said you use all the old technologies.

I was like: WTF :😂, Okay tell me what are the new technologies? My friend interrupted us.

Later I googled to see what is VFox. It is actually a hosting company and this guy who don't even have any idea about AWS, GCP, using VFox saying Ruby and Python are old technologies. Lol..

I've just googled "git how undo amend".
I can't believe I was able to put a mistake over a mistake.

Okay c/c++ megaminds, I have a question about how something is generally designed that I feel like is too broad for SO or to be effectively Googled (though my Google-Jitsu may just be a tad weak, idk)

Lets say I have, for example, a simple graphical interface system where each widget/ control may have child controls. We could store it as a simple list/ array/ vector/ whatever - say Widget.children

Now these children could be added with a function like addChild(Widget*). This function would accept widgets allocated both on the stack and on the heap... but only widgets allocated on the heap would need to be freed.

My question is: on the destructor of the parent widget, how would it free all of its child widgets, if some are on the stack and some are on the heap and we don't know which is which...

And my broader question is what's the general design for this sort of thing? Should all items just be heap allocated always? Should it never be the responsibility of the parent widget to free the child widgets?

Is there anyone who actually likes using Angular?

I decided to learn it (im backend only for many years) to be less clueless in the frontend world.. and so far i find it horrible.
Is it just a "culture shock" or do frontent angular devs also find it.. not so fun to use?

What i dont like so far is the inconsistency of syntax.. i feel like similar things done differently and not following rules that can be learned, i can't remember/guess anything, everything needs to be googled

i.e- `*ngIf` vs `[ngSwitch]`

Not to mention 3 different syntaxes to simply bind a property..

I tried vueJs about 3 years ago and it was so fun and EASY

So simple but so hard.
Having a bad cold I'v been home for a few days. Finally I could bend down without my head exploding so I could replace a harddrive in my ceph system.
I took everything off line, installed the new drive and did all the right things,
but afterwards it didnt come up.
It didn't make sense so I googled for hours while my fever were getting stronger without finding the answer.
So I gave up and reverted my changes and plugged in the old harddrive...
It still didn't work... a bit of panic. I mean... its all my files!
After a lot of sweating (no caused by fever) I realised I moved two ceph-mon processes a few weeks ago but I never rebooted the system afterwards, to fix it all I had to do:
systemctl enable ceph-mon
on two machines.

Summary: make sure things work after reboot and don't do challaging stuff while your brain is all scrambled.

My phone got stuck in funky restart boot loop yesterday. The first 2 restarts was odd but after 3 cycles, I started panicking. Went on my PC, googled for all kinds of button combinations of power button, volume button, back button, and home button to get into fastboot, recovery and safe mode to see if I can clear stuff or at least get backup of my stuff. I also tried taking the battery out. Nothing works, except when I factory reset.

Everything was new again and as it booted up, I have to remember to change my authentication keys in LastPass, my private ssh key in Krypt. But fortunately, Google remembered all my apps and suggested if I wanted to install them again since it recognized my phone was an old phone. Thanks for tracking me Google. And now since its a reset, everything is clean, no cache, cookie, and some of my music files are all gone. Well at least its fast like before.

My friend just told me his history of hating stackoverflow so much.

He said whenever he had an issue and he googled for solutions, stackoverflow pops in the search results. He clicks on stackoverflow and copy the first thing he sees.

And it always won't work out.

Few years down the line, he noticed what he has always been copying is someone else's problem and not a solution.

😢😢😁😂😂

One of the projects that I have to do this semester is a React-Native, I was very eager to start coding until a friend of mine got an error never seen before, when he googled the problem, literally in StackOverflow somebody posted the same issue just about 2h ago, still with no response. This is going to be a fun ending semester project.

PS: this project is going to have a Lisp code project connected somehow

Yesterday whole day ive been trying to deploy an ios app to app store from a flutter project but kept getting "module not found" in build compilation error

I thought to myself am i fucking dumb?

Or maybe i am smart but extremely UNLUCKY in life like always?

Today i googled for this error and one of the top stack overflow answers with a +50 bounty points, first sentence they answered was "this is a very bad and UNLUCKY error, after trying to solve this issue for hours i finally found the solution..."

......

...........

New Marketing Person: [via slack] Hey! I left a comment on the JIRA ticket. I didn’t know how to tag you so I’m messaging you here to make sure you see it.

Me: [slack] Ok, thanks for letting me know. It works the same way it does in slack. Type “@“ followed by a name.

Me: [inner monologue] 🙄 You could have also just Googled it instead of expending energy and time on this slack exchange.

Same person leaves another JIRA comment later… and doesn’t tag me…Why do I even bother to be helpful…

For months had a static clicking very faint noise on my creative speakers. Googled every issue with my x-fi titanium, swapped pcie around, changed cables you name it. In the end I blamed "dying" speakers amp as they have 10 years now only to realize a minute ago it was interference from the fecking cell phone's 4g...

does anyone diet here to increase productivity? any productivity tips? I could have googled this but I need "tried and tested". I need ideas.

I've been feeling strange for some weeks now

The only thing that sometimes bothers me about having IT knowledge (specially now that I'm officially an IT Engineer graduate) is that I still have friends that can't do simple things that they asked me when I was at highschool.

"My computer is not working", " I can't install this game", "My computer doesn't start".

Since I'm okay with helping others, I always try to help. The thing is that everytime I help is always something I google at the moment. And most of times is simple problems that don't even need to be googled

Can someone please explain to me, in the most dumbed-doen way imaginable, what the fuck SharePoint is?

Yes, I've Googled it. No, I don't understand. From everything that I've read; it just doesn't function the way I expect it to after reading about it.

Is it used to create company websites which are to be used by staff within the company. Or is it used to create normal websites, that the general public visits (maybe like a portfolio or company website showcasing products with a shopping cart and shit)?

I'm confused.

Postgresql kept shutting down at odd times. Then it became predictable. I googled, went through mailing lists, archives, old threads, Stack overflow, friends, family, my bosses, my old colleagues, forums, chat groups and paid redhat support.

Apparently, I'm the only one and the first on this planet to have this problem. And it's scary.

Wondered what that checkmark on a youtube channel means. Googled it. The summarized official answer:

In 2017 I googled “business best” and fucking osama bin ladin popped up

america eggsbrain!

How do you guys get into open-source? It’s hacktoctoberfest and I am trying to contribute to ANY project. I searched a lot, the popular python libraries I use don’t really have many good-first-issue. Most issues are very very specific that the time I try to even understand it, the person who actually implemented will probably resolve the bug. Where to even begin? How will I know which project to contribute to? I have googled but never really got answer. Searched projects but most of them were dead.

I was development a webapp, when it was well advanced I thought "it's time to decide a name" so I googled the name I was thinking and I found a website with that name. I opened it and it's pretty much the very same thing I was developing. FML

Some sites are so transparent with their sponsors. My browser is currently crashing a lot so I googled common fixes/suggestions, landed on a to-do-list kind of site.

"What to do if %BROWSER% keeps crashing?"

"Step 1: Install a bug free browser, like Opera!"