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Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I repeat
Will the bug in my code please stand up?
I think we have a problem here.
*music intensifies*11 -
Code review titles by year:
1990 - your code is using to much memory
1995 - your code is not running on window 95
2000 - your code is slow
2003 - your code don't have tests
2005 - your code is not 64 bit
2009 - your code is not using mvc patters
2010 - your code is not horizontal scalable
2011 - your code should be written in js
2015 - your code is not mobile ready
2020 - your code is racist24 -
Any devs here that Code in C/C++...?
Or am I lost in "webRant".
I am worried about the future " code everything in javascript " generation :)
Make pointers great again!75 -
Who said I can't read my own code after 2 months?
*Opens code*
.
.
.
.
.
*Cries in a corner*
*The world hates me*3 -
It finally happened. Upper management is demanding a historical (7+ years) of lines-of-code analysis of our entire code base. They want to justify our positions by validating that the lines-of-code has increased in accordance with the economy. I am not kidding. For every year, they expect some percent increase in our lines of code.18
-
Spent hours finding the problem in code. Suddenly something happens! Code works! Now I'm spending hours finding what made it work.
3 -
Shouldn't be necessary if you just write understandable code xD..... Some people just write stories in between 2 lines of code....
15 -
A while back, I ranted about emojis in code.
My nightmares are becoming reality.
Behold, production code:
36 -
When you've spent 16 hours out of 24 programming and realise that you've not eaten, drunk, or even pooped. Well, that just happened5
-
99 bugs in the code. 99 bugs in the coooode. Squish one out, patch it around. 128 bugs in the code.4
-
Tested and checked in code. Left on vacation and came back.
The code I checked in still was there, still works, and didn't cause any fires while I was gone :)
Success!2 -
A week in code:
Mon: Write all the code💻
Tue: Review all the code🔍
Wen: Fix all the broken code🔴
Thurs: Deploy🚢
Fri: Review all the code🔬4 -
3 off the most dreadful things to do as a developer
1) Documentation
2) Testing (Multiple device/browser)
3) Wearing formal clothes7 -
Coding destroyed my life. I used to be tripping and seeing flowers，now i feel like media breakpoints，i used to dream about jungle，now i dream about creating components，i used to have a few problems，now i have nothing else but problems，and here i am at 7am ranting for the first time on a nerd application which i didnt get the rants about... But now i laugh...
Where is this going????5 -
Accidentally left a test line in an API method - the first line returned a 200 OK response.
It was a notification API for our payment portal, so when they complained our API didn't work our logs always said all was fine...
After an hour of listening to our help desk guys saying "everything in our logs says it's fine", I looked at source for 2 seconds, fixed the problem, went home, had a whiskey and went to bed!1 -
This morning I kept falling back asleep after the alarm went off, drifting in and out of a dream about programming.
My wife finally said "no more sleeping".
Still mostly sleep, I replied very confidently "you can't sleep in a sandbox!".
I was dreaming I was in a code sandbox. Obviously sleeping is not allowed.
Jeez, my head has been really full of programming since this conference. (One of the talks was on codesandbox). -
Me when I'm updating my projects:
"I put some new code in,
I took some old code out,
I put some new code in and I tested it all out, I fixed some major bugs and I pushed the update out. That's what it's all about!"5 -
I accidently used the wrong language to code in... So I had to port my code over to the right one.8
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We study a lot to learn how to write code and the most satisfying thing in this profession is to delete code.3
-
Once worked for a guy who lectured me in front of the whole office because I didn't continued work at home after I stayed 3h unpaid overtime at the office.
I quit soon after that.3 -
A list of hilarious comment in code:
http://stackoverflow.com/questions/...
One that I liked in particular:
2 -
"Pasting code from the Internet into production code is like chewing gum found in the street." - unknown3
-
git commit -m "fixed bug where div wasn't resizing with window size change. Next I'll work on new bug which makes it so the pages won't load at all"
3 -
Team member just requested a code review in French (s'il vous plaît)
Yea, I'm not reviewing your code you pretentious prick5 -
Trying to write more commit , so that i can stay top in github project chart with less real code be like....
Git commit -am "added p in code"
Git commit -am "added r in code"
Git commit -am " added i in code"
Git commit -am "added n in code"
Gir commit -am "added t in code"
Git commit -am " gave the proper indentation to print"6 -
Supporting outlook in your mail templates.. On a scale of 0 to 10 with 0 being writing code in sublime/eclipse to 10 being writing code in MS Word, how difficult is it??1
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You know you learned a lot in the last year when you try to change something on a website you made 1 year ago and it is almost impossible.
The code is not well structured. PHP mixed with HTML, functions that should be organized as a class etc.
I really, really, need to refactor the entire site!4 -
1 little bug in the code
1 little bug in the code
put a little ; in now
compile it around
991 little BUGS IN THE CODE1 -
My dad coded in vim.
I code in VS Code.
My son will code in VS Code.
But his son, will code in vim.13 -
# Showing code so everyone knows it's the same code/file being executed.
Interesting in the difference of the time it takes.
8 -
I see AI autocorrecting code in ide before it gets compiled and complex ui getting exported from psd to code in few seconds3
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"A good software developer writes good code. Better software developer deletes bad code."
Me, after using Generic types in some source code and deleting 250 lines effectively.6 -
>Gets job to optimize some code
>Me:"What could go wrong?"
>Code is commented in Arab
"All around me are familiar faces..."5 -
Code it in binary
(My friend claims to code in binary, is this an actually applicable thing or just a novelty thing to impress people?)17 -
Found a code comment that states, "//Don't remove. In for a reason." with no further explanation. Um, shouldn't all the code in this project be in for a reason?4
-
Here's me sitting in the exam thinking all about my code I wrote the previous night. Suddenly brain strikes that I forgot to pass one function somewhere in the code. So I submitted my paper and left to debug the code.
Code ran but I failed in the exam :D :P -
Somehow my brain assumes that code is high performance code when its all written in lowercase... :D5
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100% of the code defects from a recent code review are from code copied from elsewhere in the codebase.1
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Coffeescript is such a pain in the ass. If I wanted to code in Python, I'll code in Python. Why do you have to add pythonicness to JS! Eat a bag of dicks!7
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I’m slowly starting to run most of my daily operations & programming in Visual Studio Code.
Here’s an example of me working in markdown files for one of my GitHub projects...directly in VS Code with live preview 👏.
7 -
People learning to code who seems to have more interest in that their code works than in why it works. Do yourself a favour and learn something you have an interest in.2
-
When you thought writing code on paper in university was bad, wait till you apply to Google and have one of your interviews writing code in Google docs.6
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When you find another student code..... it repeats the same code for the LCD in 340 lines of if ;-)
1 -
I'm a programmar
I'm a programmor
I'm a programer
*sigh*
I write code.
Still finding spelling errors in my code.3 -
Reviewing code in a project, found this one:
# Todo: Fix horrible parent member check. People may have been killed for better code
-- horrible code here -- -
99 little bugs in the code, 99 little huge, take on down, patch it around, 157 little bugs in the code
-
Manager : what is "looks good" in code review comment??? You have to be more detailed.
Me in next code review : It is not aesthetically pleasing, but it gets the job done. -
i like to write schrödinger's code.
as in, if i write code and never run it, it is both functional and nonfunctional.3 -
I have been trying to understand why my student's code isn't working just to find this piece of code. Checking out code early in the morning is definitely not my thing.
3 -
Fine don't take my suggestion during refactoring old code. Keep the python code over 100 lines of code...we could have cut it in half, but whatever
-
Spent 4h+ debugging my code (it was late)...only to realise that my code was not buggy, but the fuckup in design was in the original part I didn't change..FML..
-
Yet another day at work:
My job is to write test libraries for web services and test others code. Yes I know to code, and have a niche in software testing.
Sometimes developers (whose code I find bugs in) get so defensive and scream in emails and meetings if I point out an issue in their code.
Today, when I pointed a bug in his repo, a developer questioned me in an email asking if I even understood his code, and as a tester I shouldn’t look at his code and only blackbox test it.
I wish I can educate the defensive developer that sometimes, it’s okay to make mistakes and be corrected. That’s how we deliver services that doesn’t suck in production.10 -
99 little bugs in my code,
99 little bugs in my code,
Take one down, patch it around,
100 little bugs in my code.
1 -
Today looking at code thinking to myself "I thought I fixed that code...shit that was in my dream!"
Why me?! -
99 little bugs in the code
99 little bugs
Take one down and pass it around
127 little bugs in the code2 -
Dear fucking good why must I code in VBA in 2017 when there's a perfectly good (and better) alternative?!
I'm considering just porting the fucking code and hang it off.6 -
just saw a production level code, all the fucking variables in the code are in capital letters🤪😵😵😵2
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Our Code everlasting
The all creating One
Coders Almighty
Through Our Holy Lines
Conceiving Algorithms
Konrad Zuse our Savior
I believe in Clean Code
I believe in Free Software
I believe in Open Source
Our Code is three in one
I believe in the bug-free project
That'll be compiled again
For I believe in the name of Alan Turing -
delete this;
(in the constructor)
Actual line of code I wrote in my code because of sleep need... Coffe isnt always good, kids... Rather sleep polyphasically2 -
Friend’s code:
var monkey=77;
Go(monkey);
The worst thing in the world is reading someone’s uncommented code ...3 -
Phantom Code: Code that was written in dose state with very little knowledge what the hell fuck you were doing 😧😭
-
brainfuck - your next programming language. A simple tutorial
Sample 1:
-[------->+<]>.-[->++++<]>.++[--->++<]>.+++.+++++++.+[->+++<]>.--[--->+<]>-.+[->+++<]>+.+.[--->+<]>-.----.+++[->+++<]>++.+++++++++++++.++++++.[++>---<]>.++[--->++<]>.++[->++<]>.[--->+<]>+++.[--->+<]>-----.--[->++++<]>+.----------.++++++.--[->+++++<]>.
Output: "I love devrant. Do you?"
Sample 2:
----[---->+<]>++.[--->+<]>+++.----------.-[--->+<]>-.--[->++++<]>+.----------.++++++.---.[-->+++++<]>+++.[->+++<]>++.[--->+<]>----.+++[->+++<]>++.++++++++.+++++.-[->+++++<]>-.-[--->++<]>-.++++++++++.+[---->+<]>+++.++[->+++<]>.-[--->+<]>--.+[->+++<]>+.++++++++.------.-.[->+++<]>++.++[--->++<]>.[-->+++++<]>-.+[--->+<]>++.[-->+++++<]>+++.-[--->++<]>-.+++++++++++.[---->+<]>+++.-[--->++<]>-.++++++++++.-----.[++>---<]>++.[->+++<]>-.-[->+++++<]>.
Output: "And your brain is fucked. Or it isn't?"
----------------------
Wanna play with it?
Text to brainfuck: https://copy.sh/brainfuck/text.html
Brainfuck to text:
https://sange.fi/esoteric/...2 -
well, fuck... how about everything that works in visual studio but feels like garbage in VS Code???
don't get my wrong I use VS Code for every other language... but C# has just always felt better in visual studio than in VS Code. oh well
13 -
Reviewing the code of my then new CTO, who said "I can also code and have experience in Java" - 50 lines of code, I added over 30 comments to his Pull Request. In the end, I rewrote his complete code.2
-
The “if” statement works the same in every* language, so if you can code in one language, you can code in most of them.
*Terms and conditions apply.5 -
We've all seen bad code in our time. The code I'm currently looking at needs to die horribly in a fire. In fact, that doesn't even seem extreme enough for this monstrosity
-
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed...compile again, 100 little bugs in the code. 🐞
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i have exam in less than 12 hours but i am just trying to type LOL in Morse code.
https://lcwo.net/transmit
NO its not Morse code exam :( -
Do you agree?
Junior: What are comments
Mid-level: Hah! My code is so clean, I don't NEED comments!
Senior: comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comments comme-...25 -
Looking through job openings in case I get shafted so bad here I end up leaving, I see a nice sounding Java role and think "oohhh dis sounds good".
Required experience: Using the Eclipse IDE.
*closes page, cries* -
I am working as a functional consultant in a project and I setup a source control for a project for better code management....
I wanted to review the code and realized developers have been checking in zipped source code in that....
Checked with Dev Lead and got to know that's how they have been managing code till now in other projects in SharePoint so they are following same practices here3 -
Does anybody know of other contests like google code-in, summer of code and hacktoberfest? Not things like codewars. Any type pf contests with large tasks that are challenging. Thanks!1
-
Fifty little bugs jumping in the code,
One tracked down and dev started to code,
Developer called the compiler,
And the compiler said
Hundred more bugs (& errors) found in the code
-
I regularly diss on PHP in office but the truth is just that the developers before me wrote bad code. It was bad code in PHP alright but they had a whole framework to use and at least organize their code better but they didn't use it.
I have seen their JavaScript code too and it was all in one file.
P.S. I have no idea under which condition they had to write the code. The app was initially outsourced.5 -
Experienced programmer:
Code works in head; code almost works in computer; code never works with client.
Beginner programmer:
Code almost works in head; code never works in computer; code will never work with client.
Long story short: it's hard to begin but when you let the code flow, you became a programmer -
Found this in production code.
For those who doesn’t understand Delphi:
switch (some boolean) {
case false:
// some code
default:
// some code
}
7 -
I'm confused. How'd we go from contributors like Ada Lovelace, Grace Hopper and Margret Hamilton, to: WE NEED MORE WOMEN IN TECH, WE NEED MORE WOMEN IN TECH!!!10
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I'm writing c# code, does not work, wrote the same code in python just to see if I'm thinking the wrong way, nope, it worked in python then fixed the c# code...
I might be a c# racist or I don't know.2 -
Today, making a list out loud while in a conversation with a co-worker.
Me:
"thing one" *puts out hand*,
"thing two" *raises thumb*,
"thing three" *raises index finger*,
"thing four" *raises middle finger*
Co-worker: "That's 3 fingers, you said 4 things.."
Me: "I guess I mentally counted in base 0.."3 -
Open folder in Windows Explorer.
Right click empty space, then click "Open with Code."
Awesome!
VS Code keeps amazing me.3 -
Just got to experience this classic (again):
99 little bugs in the code, take one down, patch it around, 127 little bugs in the code... -
One of the best feelings is when you're hip deep in code refactoing and you're delezing old code with your new and shiny code.
-
They say in java Errors cannot be handled in developer code. But here my code handles a StackOverflowError. What is going on here?
16 -
Any code should be simple and easy to read / understand.
I just reworked an old stored SQL proc.
Went from 102 lines to ... 10.
More I code, more I realize that maintainability, readability, comments and unit tests are more important than actual code. (And performances ofc. But if 1 line code does it in 1 second and 500 lines code in 0.2 seconds, I’ll take one line solution every time)5 -
Not sure what is going to be worse. Fixing the bug in this code. Or removing all of the code I added in the name of finding the bug in this code. I have found myself asking myself why I chose coding when I come have picked something less stressful. Like flaming bull fighting.
-
When you have a lot of work to do and don't want to come out of bed.
But once in awhile, you wake up early, bursting with energy and you think: "Today I'm going to fix every single line of code that looks like a pice of shit!" -
When meta-programming finally clicks and your code can make its own code, which in turn makes its own code.1
-
Me coding in swift:
func doStuff() {
// code
}
"oh I see the code isn't working yet. Let me try this"
func doStuff() {
DispatchQueue.main.async {
// code
}
}4 -
What is easy to code at the moment isnt necessarily the best code in the long run.
- From the dev currently maintaining spaghetties of spaghetti code -
When i code in PHP. I forgot to type semicolon.
When i code in Kotlin I forgot that semicolon is not necessary.1 -
Sing: "110 little bugs in my code,
110 little bugs,
Fixing one bug,
Compiling again
Now there are 121 little bugs in the code"3 -
I don't have to get in to the zone as I'm in the zone all the time. I sleep and dream code, eat code, actually write code, workout code...3
-
Hey there everyone, I stay in a hostel which tends to misplace all post, so I always have everything sent home.
And today is the day I finally received everything from the last six months that was couriered to me from home. I'm so excited. Finally got the devrant and WhatsMyIP stickers, the GCI and Twilio tshirts (The Twilio one is just too good) and also some cool handwritten notes. Loved it.
PS. Exams also ended today. So yay!
PPS. Now rooting for the stress ball 😂
4 -
Do you guys have a dress code in your office?
Do you think that having a dress code is important?35 -
A dedicated team has built an "infrastructure" for creating UI for c++ developers in the company. What looks like a poor attempt at recreating what Microsoft did with XAML at first glance, it actually is a horrible exercise in force feeding people the stinking pile of shit that their code is.
The idea is to make it easy to create UI for developers who aren't used to front end development. They should just need to declare the layout. Very noble.
But.
If you want to do anything more than show a checkbox or a radio button, if you dare to define relationships between the UI controls or worse, if you get ambitious with creating a simple UI that uses a lot of similar controls and similar relationships with dynamic content... be prepared to eat your own barf from eating too much of their shit.
Not only do you now need to write front end code (including JS among others), you need to do it with limited or poor support and you have to make sure that it sits well with the house of moist, crumbly cards the team proudly created. Or resort to some very stupid and performance costing "bypasses" that further cripple your application code. Usually you have to do both of these things.
To think that scores of other teams have welcomed this amazing enhancement with full support without any resistance. It's sickening.
I waste too much of energy (and good jokes!) with these people.4 -
Best code review experience was when I was mentor in a bootcamp and I had to review code from scholars, they were surprised by how their code could be written in less lines.
-
Bugs are good in code. It shows that you're Human. You make mistakes. And you're willing to correct them.
But when they're someone else's bugs in a piece of code they didn't give a flying fuck about documentation, bugs can tick one off. The bigger the project, the better the documentation needs to be. And I'm not taking about java docs. Put proper comments in your code. Especially when it's not a personal project and you fully intend to leave the company. -
- Promote source control usage especially in group projects
- Teach clean code principles
- Push for commented code in exercises -
In what programming language, you love to code the most?
edge case: if you don't love to code, then skip the question13 -
Importing all libraries at once above the code VS importing libraries when u need them in the code4
-
I had this dream, We had to destroy this super mainframe who wanted some revenge because we as a programmers made a lot of mistakes in the code.
So we had to create this amazing machine with super powers and machine learning and then to go back to the past to save the world and to find me and protect me from the same machines that we created..
At the end, I died.. because the fucking machine betrayed me.1 -
I feel like I am trapped in a maze of a 20 year code base so many dead ends. Dead code...dead code everywhere1
-
I just noticed the code in the docs of Vue.js contains no semicolons... I literally can't find a single semicolon in their code :O2
-
The code I am supposed to refactor only builds if mounted on/as drive s:\.
Sure worked for the previous dev.
First thing to do: new makefile. And git init. -
Learning how to leaning. It is not emphasized enough in work place. Reading, speeding, read code, speed reading code. Comprehension of code, grit, growing mind set.
-
A senior dev wrote spaghetti code containing business logic in the fucking controller with some code repeated in a couple of other places.
This is when a facepalm is not enough.1 -
Rewriting some fractal generation code for a client in Python. his original code was in Visual Basic. he sent me his original code as a fucking Microsoft Word document...............
-
Got dragged into business meeting. Said stupid things because I didn't know they were secrets... Can't wait to get chewed out. Why am I not just a code monke?!?!2
-
Messy business rules results in messy code base results in unhappy programmers results in high turnover rate results in more messy code results in falling business
-
saw some stuff witj codehub logo on it and i was curious about what it is. so i went to the site and clicked on the sign in button and saw this...
i will not sign in to that.
5 -
Is there any chance that Linux open source distributions such as Ubuntu would hide malicious code or backdoor or similar thing in their code and simply hide it in their release publication?15
-
What is worse code that works in debug but not in production or code that doesn't work in debug but does work in production. Both without usable stack traces.
Currently batteling both.... -
copied google's material design lite javascript code and the snackbar code from the official website but it doesnt work in localhost6
-
Fuck entity framework code first! It's a pain in the ass making relationships work with code first! 😑😑6
-
That moment when you are trying to understand your mentor for one simple task and he has it differently planned and you don't understand what he's trying to tell you and he doesn't understand you.
-
I don’t like commented code in a project, I always remove commented code whenever I see. But sometimes these removed commented codes need again to add by uncommenting.
I can get the code by seeing the git history but if only I can remember I removed that portion of code. So is there is any best approach to manage commented code, which may require in real future?3 -
Never due to code but because of code because we are all friends in this industry (except the occasional few).
-
More like :
For number in range(5){
Your code
}
Or
For number in range(5)
{
Your code
}
( I know that in python for is not use with { that was just for the exemple )4 -
99 little bugs in the code, 99 little bugs in the code. Take one down, patch it around 117 little bugs in the code.
-____________- -
Speaking of Go.
defer() is like blessing.
Every time I code in Python, especially asyncio code, I wish it has something similar.2 -
Seriously, why is the code editor in cpanel so friggin' buggy???
It even crashed Microsoft Edge to desktop so I lost all changes in my code....1 -
Level of anxiety = ((Size of the programming project code)^2) * (100 - Percentage of the tested code in project)2
-
I recently saw this on devRant and I thought it was a cool idea.
Why don't we start writing code in each comment down here in order to form some C# (or Java) code working? I'll start from:
public class devRant {8 -
Someone needs to make a clip of Obiwan getting cut down by Darth Vader. Then following after Obiwan is re-materialized on a transporter deck in Star Trek.
-
Random idea for the day.
An IDE plugin that allows intentionally mixing syntax from different programming languages in invalid ways within the same file.
BUT corrects code blocks to the right way by checking each code block detected as invalid say every thirty seconds. Generating code that is equivalent in output to the incorrectly specified code.
Any takers?2 -
Javascript - VS code
Python - VS code (linters sometimes show weird errors)
Dart/Flutter - VS code
Debugging qa instance via eb ssh - Vim with vim cheat sheet opened in browser tab -
We were learning how to code circles to light up in sequence. As it's similar to how code works for Arduino. Cool. Go back to c# in Unity and teach what the code does not just copy.
-
CODE DOJO
yesterday a had a code dojo firt time in my life. do y like code dojo? do y have some good advices? because i would like to organize code dojo in our firm.3 -
#hindirant
Code aisa likho ki dusre ko hilana na pade
Translation :
Write code in such a way that other coder need not to change their code -
Hell, I always thought I was a team player, but is it a great week being the sole developer (all the other on vacation). So I didn't get interrupted all the time, read overblown PR. Still, even in their absence I spent about three days fixing their build issues and PR's, but I could sit down and read the code, some documentation to get a better understanding why it all sucks and what we should do with our pain in the ass build system.
It's really a blast, deleting some stupid code, removing superfluous dependencies and above all leaving snarky remarks in the commit messages and code comments. Just letting some steam off. Code is where my devrant is. -
"I'm going to save space in my source code file by using obscure abbreviations for all my #define statements, and cramming as much C code into as few lines as possible."
- teammate who apparently has no idea how a preprocessor works, and who thinks "code density" literally means cramming lines of code in as small a space as possible in the source file!
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