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Client: There is a high severity production issue.. you need to fix urgently..
Developer: I am on the way.. Will fix it once I reach home.
Client: I don't care where you are. Fix it right now😡😡
Developer
14 -
I have decided to learn how to fix the printer. Because it seems like it is the number one skill in demand..11
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Client: can you fix the slider on my homepage please?
Me: It seems to be working just fine
Client: it works but it’s not how I want it, fix it
Me: well what do you want me to change then?
Client: don’t change it, just fix it!
😒2 -
Start coding for work this morning, immediately notice a ui bug, ugh. Want to get cracking with another bug I'm supposed to fix.
Fix the bug, and it incidentally fixes the other bug. Two in one.
*Suspicious*4 -
im a programmer.
Moms : Son, please fix my phone
Me : what the...
Moms : Cmon ur the IT guy right?
Dad : My laptop must be broken, can u fix it ?
Me : i can't..
Dad : ur degree is useless
Me : ....
Friend : hi, ur the IT guy right ? can u help me ?
Me : Sure ...
Friend : please hack my BF facebook account..
Me : *face Palm.17 -
Sometimes you wish life was like computer, so every time some fuck happens you can just fix it or reinstall it
5 -
I really love it when people just downvote your question on stackoverflow without any explanation, it helps a lot to fix my problem thx 👌8
-
My friend: My laptop is not working. Can you please fix it?
Me: Ok. I will take a look at it.
*After 1 hours*
Me: I think your hard disk has failed.
My friend: Can't you fix it? You always spend day and night on your computer. So, I think you can fix it.
Me: Sorry. I can't.
*Next day I went to his home*
His brother to my friend: You said he is a genious. He can fix anything related to computer. He can't do anything. I will take it to a best repair shop in the area.
Me: *walks out of his home*11 -
/***********************************
/* a temporary hack, fix it later *
***********************************/
That was 7 years ago. I mean it was last edited 7 years ago when a temporary hack was created. It is now a permanent solution as nobody know what we are supposed to fix
.... Nothing is more permanent than a temporary fix. Not even clean refactored and tested code.13 -
My family: Can you repair the printer ?
Me: No ...
My family: can't send my emails, fix it !
Me: No ...
My family: why this people can share my photos on Facebook ? Stop it now !
Me: Then stop sharing all your god damn life each time you eat, fart or go to the bathroom !!!! For fucks sake !
Also me: why have I started computer science ?2 -
The stupid stories of how I was able to break my schools network just to get better internet, as well as more ridiculous fun. XD
1st year:
It was my freshman year in college. The internet sucked really, really, really badly! Too many people were clearly using it. I had to find another way to remedy this. Upon some further research through Google I found out that one can in fact turn their computer into a router. Now what’s interesting about this network is that it only works with computers by downloading the necessary software that this network provides for you. Some weird software that actually looks through your computer and makes sure it’s ok to be added to the network. Unfortunately, routers can’t download and install that software, thus no internet… but a PC that can be changed into a router itself is a different story. I found that I can download the software check the PC and then turn on my Router feature. Viola, personal fast internet connected directly into the wall. No more sharing a single shitty router!
2nd year:
This was about the year when bitcoin mining was becoming a thing, and everyone was in on it. My shitty computer couldn’t possibly pull off mining for bitcoins. I needed something faster. How I found out that I could use my schools servers was merely an accident.
I had been installing the software on every possible PC I owned, but alas all my PC’s were just not fast enough. I decided to try it on the RDS server. It worked; the command window was pumping out coins! What I came to find out was that the RDS server had 36 cores. This thing was a beast! And it made sense that it could actually pull off mining for bitcoins. A couple nights later I signed in remotely to the RDS server. I created a macro that would continuously move my mouse around in the Remote desktop screen to keep my session alive at all times, and then I’d start my bitcoin mining operation. The following morning I wake up and my session was gone. How sad I thought. I quickly try to remote back in to see what I had collected. “Error, could not connect”. Weird… this usually never happens, maybe I did the remoting wrong. I went to my schools website to do some research on my remoting problem. It was down. In fact, everything was down… I come to find out that I had accidentally shut down the schools network because of my mining operation. I wasn’t found out, but I haven’t done any mining since then.
3rd year:
As an engineering student I found out that all engineering students get access to the school’s VPN. Cool, it is technically used to get around some wonky issues with remoting into the RDS servers. What I come to find out, after messing around with it frequently, is that I can actually use the VPN against the screwed up security on the network. Remember, how I told you that a program has to be downloaded and then one can be accepted into the network? Well, I was able to bypass all of that, simply by using the school’s VPN against itself… How dense does one have to be to not have patched that one?
4th year:
It was another programming day, and I needed access to my phones memory. Using some specially made apps I could easily connect to my phone from my computer and continue my work. But what I found out was that I could in fact travel around in the network. I discovered that I can, in fact, access my phone through the network from anywhere. What resulted was the discovery that the network scales the entirety of the school. I discovered that if I left my phone down in the engineering building and then went north to the biology building, I could still continue to access it. This seems like a very fatal flaw. My idea is to hook up a webcam to a robot and remotely controlling it from the RDS servers and having this little robot go to my classes for me.
What crazy shit have you done at your University?9 -
*Doing a Peer Code Review of someone senior to me*
Me: This fix doesn't look like it will work, but maybe I don't understand. How does this fix the defect?
Senior Dev: *Blinks* It works on my machine
Me: But how does it work?
Senior Dev: It works when I run it on my machine...
Me: Do you know if this will fix the issue?
*Silence*
Never seen QA punt an issue back to development so fast.7 -
Person: You're good with computers right?
Me: Yes.
P: My computer won't boot after I unplugged it while trying to move it, how do I fix it?
M: I don't know
P: I thought you were good with computers
M: I am. Can't troubleshoot a computer with that little of info.
P: If I bring it to you will you fix it for me?
M: No.
P: What if burritos are involved?
M: I would consider it
This. This is how conversations should go when somebody asks us to fix their computer.8 -
Me: ooh my eyes hearts, I have to sleep now, I fix this tomorrow morning.
(go to sleep)
Inner Me: hey
Me: ...
Inner Me: pisst! wake up
Me: what?? leave me alone I'm tired
Inner Me: remember that issue you had?
Me: yes?
Inner Me: this is how you can solve it
Me: great thanks, I'll fix it later
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now
Me: I'm tired, I'll fix it first thing in the morning
Inner Me: no no you'll forgot it
Me: no I won't, let me sleep
Inner Me: no no you'll forget and I won't tell you again
Me: look I write it down in my phone now leave me alone
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now.
Me: *crying* for God sake...
(gets out of bed and try to turn on PC and it's not starting, realizing that the power is out)
Me: you happy now, I fix it tomorrow.
Inner Me: no no stay awake till power is back on.
Me: SHUT THE FICN ON PICK OF CRAPE. Did SHDUHDBD DBDJDB3 -
Client: There is a high severity production issue.. you need to fix urgently..
Developer: I am on the way.. Will fix it once I reach home.
Client: I don't care where you are. Fix it right now😡😡
See the developer!!!
3 -
1) no more "can you fix my printer?"
2) no more "but you're the IT guy!"
3) no more "can you fix my printer?"4 -
You write code.
A strange issue prevents you to proceed further.
Try one fix. Fails.
Try another Fix. Fails.
...
Try fix #28. Fails.
You decide to ask for help in the support forum.
You start writing your post, mentioning everything you've tried so far. You feel your social anxiety and fear the humiliation of being told "because you didn't try X, you idiot". Then you come up with an idea for fix #29.
(fix #29 normally involves Wireshark or similar low-level inspection tool)
Try fix #29. It succeeds :)5 -
Been working on a bug fix for 3 hours. Literally nothing I do will fix it. Finally I realize I'm not even calling the function.5
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Taking "fixing a bug in your head once you walk away from the machine" to a new level.
Fixed a bug, checked it in. Happy.
Go to a meeting 5 minutes later. 10 minutes into the meeting have the sudden realisation that the bug fix was wrong and while it would fix the issue it would break something else.
Anxiously sit there for 50 more minutes not really paying attention because all I can think about is that sucker being auto deployed to our Dev server.
Managed to fix it and get it committed without anyone noticing but FML.2 -
$ npm audit
> found 19 vulnerabilities (10 low, 5 moderate, 3 high, 1 critical)
$ npm audit fix
> fixed 0 of 19 vulnerabilities in 11987 scanned packages
> (use `npm audit fix --force` to install breaking changes; or do it by hand)
$ npm audit fix --force
> npm WARN using --force I sure hope you know what you are doing.
Me too, buddy. Me too.1 -
If I flag a bug on your PR don’t fucking do this:
if (bugOccurs()) handleBug()
Fix what is causing the bug, don’t bandaid it.
Manager: wElL yOu NeEd To ExPlAiN tO tHeM eXaCtLy HoW tO fIx It, hOw ArE tHeY sUpPoSeD tO kNoW?!
Dev: …1 -
Ever been stuck in a bug, you sleep it off, dreamed of the code to fix it and you woke up, tried it, and it worked??7
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When ever someone asks me to fix their PC I ask them to sit down next to me so I can show them how I did it. First thing I do is open up Google search the problem then look them dead in the eye and smile 😂😂😂. I Then proceed to implement the fix from the first page of results. I don't get many repeat requests... I'm Such a passive cunt.😂😂😂5
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*family dictionary*
Software developer (noun) : IT guy.
Individual who will know every issue you have with any electronic device in your house. He'll fix it. -
My boss, who can't code, just gave me a bug to fix and said should be a quick fix...
It might be, but since you can't code, maybe don't assume
🤦♂️5 -
Team leader: hey why this bug is taking too much time? You could fix it hours ago let me try to fix it. I really fuckin hate juniors ...
*Hours later*
Me: could you fix it ?
Team leader: ....
*Couple of years later*
Me: ah i see it's not an easy but could you find any solution bro?
Team leader: no it's not a straight forward bug. You are right am sorry i shouldn't prejudge5 -
So you think it's bad when your friends, family, strangers and others ask you to fix their phone or computer is bad when they hear you're a programmer, IT or good with computers?
You think it's bad when they ask you whether you're hacking when they see code or terminal on your screen?
You think it's bad when they ask you to fix a cracked phone screen because you work with computers?
Well, think again because today my teammate was asked to fix a vending machine by X from another department because, according to X the vending was not accepting X's other dollar bill. The first dollar bill was accepted so why wouldn't it accept the 2nd one? Because the 🤬 dollar bill is crumpled. That's it.
What wows me is what made X think this is an IT issue.
According to X.... "because it has power, lights and touch screen so IT can fix it That's what you guys do, right? You can fix anything".
Me: wait!?, what?, uhhh..., are you serious? Wtf? Why? Grrrr4 -
My head hurt today when I heard this: "We could not reproduce the problem but we put in a fix and are pretty sure that it will fix the problem."1
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Manager: "<third-party vr app> isn't working. Think you could fix it by tomorrow?"
Me: "I can't fix it without the source code."
Manager: "Didn't you install it?"
Me: "I did, but I'd need <third-party>'s source code if you want me to make changes and that problem would probably take at least a day to fix."
Manager: "Can't believe you don't have the source code. Aren't you supposed to have your code available?"
(Just....)18 -
Dad : My WhatsApp has an issue and you're a software engineer. Fix it
Me : Looks like a Android bug...can't do anything.
Dad : Come with me, this guy at the shop around the corner who does prepaid talk time recharge will fix it... learn from him
Me : facepalm , gotta kill that guy1 -
As a senior developer, I introduced a bug in the hiring system at the company I worked at and it took HR nearly 2 years to fix it.
Bug: Every candidate I interview on Wednesday between 12:30 PM and 4:15 PM gets selected irrespective of performance.
Impact: 270 candidates got a job
1st Fix [1.5 years in]: Add multiple developers to conduct a single interview (still did not fix it completely after all I was a senior developer)
2nd Fix [2 years in]: Removed me from the hiring committee
3rd Fix [though was not needed but for HR's extra safety]: Started recording all interviews
It was a good time.3 -
---- BEGIN RANT ----
Microsoft Exchange
---- END RANT ----
I have to fix this fucking fucked up thing again. Fuck.
The dude who wanted to use it does not have the skills to fix it. Fuck off. This bullshit is going to get migrated asap17 -
PM: Can you fix this issue with the file upload?
me: Sure, give me the file that's having the issue so I can figure out why that specific one isn't working.
PM: Oh... it wasn't working so I deleted it.
Me: OK, are there any other files that cause this error.
PM: No... it was a single case. You can fix it anyway, right?3 -
Ugh, ansible and yml formats. I thought to fix a small issue fast and commit it directly.. but noooo
2 -
Me : I found this code issue, I think we need to fix it
PO: does it affect the user?
Me: not really but we can make it better
PO: do you have a defect for it in *insert issue tracker here*
Me: no, I just noticed it
PO: is there an IM ticket for it?
Me: I don't think so
PO: is this issue already in production?
Me: possibly. Yes. That's why I was wondering if we should fix it.
PO: okay then we will fix it in the 3rd release from now if you still remember it by then.5 -
Think about it:
It wouldn't be a real "bug" if it needed a 200 line fix. These little insects are so tiny they can easily hide even behind a misplaced apostrophe.
(In response to people getting upset about 1 line being enough to fix a 3 day problem)2 -
analysing a database problem and writing a 4-line fix: 5 minutes.
preparing a foolproof manual for the manager on how to apply the fix: 15 minutes
writing a manager-level explanation what the fix does: 30 minutes.
explaining it to the manager: 30 minutes.
writing a _detailled_ explanation why we need the fix: 60 minutes.
explaining it to the manager again: 30 minutes.
figuring out why our progress is slow:
_priceless_6 -
Mom: My printer won't start. Can you FIX it?
Me: Mom, I am a coder, I don't know jack about hardware.
A week later....
Mom: My printer won't start. Can you FIX it?
Me: This question is marked as duplicate and closed as off-topic. 🤖
Hangs up.7 -
LPT: If you use Linux, always carry another one in your pocket (flash drive) in case you'd need to fix your main one after you kill it again7
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When your sysadmins can't script a file compare and so you do the code for them.
"Sorry but we can't run unknown code on the server"
Read the code then you vile troglodytes!3 -
IT != Help Desk
Yes I'm in IT (I'm a software developer). No I cannot fix Outlook not opening for you.11 -
//Quickfix
//TODO: Buy a replacement switch and fix it in the proper way
Narrator: he never bought the replacement
1 -
After wasting most of the afternoon trying to fix Visual Studio, I can honestly say is is the worst IDE I have ever had the misfortune to use.
Seems the only way to "fix" it is to erase it and reinstall.
Fml15 -
when you know the code is inefficient but they wanted it fast so you say "fuck it, I'll fix this later", but you never do...3
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No, I'm not going to approve your one-line fix. It will introduce more problems in the future. Fix it the way we agreed on this morning!2
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One of my biggest pet peeves is when I see people say shit like "fix it now" when a bug pops up.
Like bitch go fix it since you're such a fucking intelligent individual. You can't? Well then, shut the fuck up and let them fix it. They're human too, ya know2 -
So I need to "fix" a false-positive security warning (mass-assignment of a foreign key). Do I "fix" it by...
A) Setting it manually and double-saving the object?
B) Rewriting the mass-assignment so the linter doesn't realize what I'm doing?
Both options suck.
But security is going to complain if I don't do it.
Guess what?
I'm not doing it.
SMD you ducks.10 -
I know whats wrong, I know how to fix it, but it would require too much energy so trying to find a different way to fix it1
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"We should probably fix that security issue, but the application already works, so it does not matter" - My boss2
-
The developer's conundrum:
Do I fix the issue before a user encounters it...
Or do I wait for a user to contact me and then quickly fix it so they think I am super helpful.6 -
No. Just no. The null pointer exception didn't come from my DB, it came from your Java code, so go away and fix it.2
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My grandfather has two anti virus programs installed, but only wants one.
Guess who has to fix it...5 -
Maybe not worst, but most frustrating. One of the systems I helped maintain at my first job had a few different bugs that caused bad data in the database. The "solution" to the problem was to write SQL queries to directly fix the production data. This would take one member of our team (it rotated weekly) about an hour every day to fix because there were literally dozens of these errors.
All the devs knew that we could identify the root cause and fix it in, probably, 3-4 days tops. Management would never approve the time because it would take longer to fix the root cause than it took to fix the data.
I worked at that company for 7 years. The bug was there when I came on, and it was there when I left.2 -
I recently found a ridiculous edge case that no test case caught and is very hard to debug and fix.
Then, I was assigned to find and fix it.
FML4 -
When your boss asks you if you know how to fix it and how long it is going to take.
Task Manager (not responding) -
Drilled holes and put some new bolts in my laptop to fix the hinge. Kind of looks odd but I like it😂
11 -
I fucking hate frontend development
>updates three dependencies for security reasons
>entire thing falls apart
>spends whole week to fix it
>its literally just two lines to fix it but those lazy mfs had to ask a QA to rewrite it
>mfw3 -
Yeah well fuck right off then. I'm just going to build a bot to auto signup for every possible username combination left in the latin alphabet. Then after the media bullshit dies down they'll be changing this policy.
👺
19 -
When a PR merged to improve functionality breaks the functionality 🥳 and now I have to fix the FIX to fix it.2
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Is it possible to find a fix to a bug while you’re having a lucid dream?
Because as soon as I woke up I ran to my computer and heck it actually worked!
Which would mean subconscious mind knows why every error is occurring and how to fix it.
Which means our subconscious mind is playing our conscious mind.
Superiority complex.10 -
If you don't know, there are 2 types of bug fixes:
Hot Fix - Patch files directly on the production
Quick Fix - Deploy fix on production and then test it4 -
Today my phone screen broke!
Need to fix it..
But I realized that using a LeEco phone, my company's already too broke to fix it!2 -
"This needs to go into production NOW"
Five hours later...
"That fix is on production now"
"Thanks, did you fix that other bug on production? We need it fixed now" -
Goes back to high school.....
Me: This laptop is having issues logging into the network. I have tried restarting as well as restarting the WiFi. You probally should submit a ticket so IT knows it is broken.
Teacher: They would not fix it anyway.
Me: *facepalm*
TL;DR: Teacher thinks that telling IT to fix a computer would result in nothing happening.1 -
This is irritating. Fuck you stitchfix. If I were convicted of a felony and did time, my odds of finding a job are basically zero. But for some reason (I can only surmise weaponized wokeness, or has an executives sex tape) they want to keep this fuck on who maliciously deletes half of Cisco's AWS service infra, pleads guilty and is looking at 5 years and $250k in fines.
https://theregister.com/2020/08/...
This isn't even the first time their sourcing of resources has become a problem. Deloitte nailed them just last year with an audit that said their outsourcing had led to effectively no way for them to control their financials or secure customer data. And their response is apparently, double down.
https://wsj.com/amp/articles/...
Fucking MBA fucks. -
setTimeout(() => {
// some temporary fix, will solve later
}, 0)
...aaaand it stayed there for eternity.6 -
When you have a bug in code that you are trying to fix for a century and then when you fix it you, make 15 more bugs by solving that bug like wtf2
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"I don't like it. Fix it."
No more explanation available. Plenty of constructive criticism to work on there then... -
Gah! Person in work has an issue I suggest a fix and even give them the bleeding code. For them just to say it won't work due to x y and z, I know it will work heck I use this 'fix'. Then later someone who has been there longer gives them the same fix and they are suddenly all appreciative. Ffs wouldn't be so annoyed if this was the first time this has happened.1
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Even better... When your trying to fix something, but the fix was something you thought at the very start but thought "it can't be that".
-
Note to self, don't fix a minor bug that will not effect the demo right before the live demo. My program that was working great didn't work anymore during the demo because of my quick bug fix I figured I had a few minutes to add to my code.1
-
Back when I lived in my university dorm I shared my room with internet admin. Usually I helped people with internet problems when he wasn't there and I've placed FAQ on the door how to fix common stuff with a little note, that I can help only with internet problems and only with those that aren't listed. It worked for most people, but one guy knocked and messaged me around 5 times a day to fix his system. So I've decided to finally do what he wants.
He: come on, I heard from XYZ that you are an admin in job and you fixed her computer.
Me: but I work only with servers
He: what's the difference? Just copy my photos to my external drive and install new system on my laptop, just like you do it in job.
Me: so this is that simple job?
He: yup, but I need a laptop tomorrow, because I have something to do at the evening.
Me: okay
I've used find to copy all the photos from his HDD and installed minimal Debian without xorg on the laptop. He hasn't come back after picking up his computer. And that's the way to get rid of leechers that whine for fixing everything because you are IT guy :D1 -
In my current team, when someone else's code breaks, I fix it. When my code breaks, I also fix it. I feel like there's something wrong here...1
-
love it when people rage quit when you fix the tech debt problem they created because they think the fix is too stupid 🤣BYEEEEE!
-
Job security:
- Create bugs purposely
- Discover the bugs after a while (if you discover it too quickly it will look suspicious)
- Fix the bug1 -
"If it ain't broke, don't fix it
I gave it to you straight don't mix it"...
Since when did DMX take on Programming?1 -
2 hours ago my vacation started
5 minutes ago I got a sentry error, a certain page is inaccessible for some reason
Guess who's definitely not going to fix that
(there are other people that can fix it tomorrow) -
Reading through old post-it notes and found a TODO that says "fix code" with no indication of a project it refers to lol1
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Hi guys @dfox @trogus , just wanted to report a tiny annoyance lol
If a rant is posted with a picture, then edited, I don't see any way to remove the picture without deleting the rant.
The "Attach img/gif" should say remove current attachment when the post is being edited, or an additional button maybe.
Thanks, others can give suggestions if got em (:3 -
Me:how about this one ui component boss. I think we must fix it.
Boss:just drop it out, do another job. wait customer to complain, after we got one complain then you fix that.6 -
I hate it when a family member ask me to fix something and I fold and try and fix it. I start to troubleshoot and they see what I'm doing and say "oh I thought you knew how to fix it, NVM I can do it." Like wtf this is how u fix stuff2
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Quick android gif workaround
The fix is to open the gif in fullscreen, wait 5 seconds, close it and open it again.
It will load the second time.1 -
When I slap the side of the machine to fix it that it would actually work...every time, without fail.
-
Apple anmiates views so nicely 😉
They have this error for so long now and it irritates me every time...
1 -
That sinking feeling when you realize you’ve been running all you got commands in the wrong repo. 😐 I can fix it but DAMN IT2
-
Your Telerik Kendo UI has a bug? I can fix it. It shouldn't be difficult because there is just so much support and documentation.
-
"Can't connect to the Internet? Run this to fix it! `wget internet/path/fix.sh`" ...thank you, random forum post.4
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Hate those bugs, where you stumble upon a fix but have no idea why it fixes it or what is causing the bug!2
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Listen dude I get it, you've been in more of a Systems Admin role for a long time, you haven't really worked on a devlike team.
I can be patient I can be understanding. But when you break the build you need to fix it.
Yes I know you didn't change any of the files that are now failing, but you the pipeline is no longer deploying and so we can't fix anything.
Okay dude we are being prevented from deploying because you broke the build, you need to fix it. It's stopping everyone else.
DUDE FIX THE FLIPPING BUILD EVERYONE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO FIX THAT!
Seriously I know we should be patient with people learning new things, but some days it is difficult.5 -
Trying to install Centos7 onto my proliant g6, red screen, try a fix, red screen, try another fix, red screen, finally find a fix that seems like it is the exact problem, screen dies can't see bios... god damnit.18
-
btw boobies because hair color and because sometimes I speak about myself in feminine gender just to mess with people (and because mentally I am probably a woman even tho physically I look like a man - shit happens)5
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* Customer reports bug.
* I fix the bug.
* This highlights another issue that I haven't got enough resources to fix.
* I revert the fix.
* <insert hacky workaround here>
We have code that invokes undefined behaviour (freeing memory twice), but somehow people have managed to build around it and now it depends upon it to work.
FML. -
That feeling when you fix your 100% disk usage.
P.S. It was Superfetch AND "Microsoft Compatibility Telemetry"4 -
To be honest the exact bug I don't remember. I do recall that it had something stupid I had been trying to fix to get nodejs working on a raspberry pi. I finally figured it out and managed to get a simple rest server going. After hours of trying to fix what might now seem insignificant, I was not only relieved that I got it working, but also thrilled that I kept at it and managed to fix it.
selfConfidence++; -
Do the hard stuff first. Then everything else looks easy. Make a mess of the code, then fix it and make it efficient.4
-
That one line of code that you know the logic of it and you know what is causing the error, but you can’t fix it!3
-
While driving home from work.
Then I have two choices either fix it when I get home or remember to fix it the next day, which I then have to think very hard to remember what the solution was.
Should have fixed it when I got home ... 😫1 -
11 pm: Me: I'm going to go to bed after I fix this bug!
3 am: *Pulling my hair out trying to fix the bug*
Me: HOW IS IT 3 AM ALREADY!1 -
Today:
Well, this data has been wrong since ... uh forever....
Well, how bad can it be, the company is still afloat and nobody has complained?
*fix*
*fix*
*fix*
-creeps away slowly-
2 -
We had programming classes in school today and I was using same computer yesterday but today it wouldn't boot up properly. So what I did is I have just restarted it multiple times and now it works again. I don't know why this happened but if it works I won't question it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯1
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Designer: 'Help! The parallax website I designed is running really slowly. Fix it! Fix it! Fix it!'
Me (In my head): 'Yeah, no shit. Can't think why...' -
When you finally start a project just for fun, and then you give your computer to IT to fix it. 1 whole week...
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Have huge argument with my client on Skype about some CSS fix on client site. I believe i already fix it and can see it on my desktop, but client insist he can't see any different. At the end, i realize that i fix on my local and we both laugh at it. Just kidding, he never contact me again after the project.2
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Working on a platform with very few users and developers kinda sucks. There is only like 5 forums about this platform and it has less than one than a 1000 threads. Stack overflow has nothing on it so that sucks. I am trying to fix this weird bug and I cannot find anything to fix it. Guess I will call it a feature.1
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Oh my... Webkit is trolling me again. How easy was it to style a website in Firefox and then I found out it looks like shit in Chrome. I can't event fix it fuckkkk.
The best part of the story - it's Bootstrap so I would assume it could work the same across the browsers.2 -
This code is huge ! THAT MEANS IT HAS HUGE BUGS !
FIX AND PATCH !
FIX AND PATCH YOUR BUGS !
Basically the reason I want to work on a big codebase one day is to be able to scream that
Winks if you get the reference (just so you know, I didn't read it fully)2 -
How does an Android fix its problems?
It tries turning it off and on again, but if that doesn't work, it blames it on the manufacturer. -
My It teacher told me to fix their *SmallBasic* chat-client which they use for our class. And it is holidays!!
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!rant
When a very last minute change is required and you panic a bit, thinking it will take days to fix... but you manage to fix it before lunchtime because the API is well made.1 -
only programmers can tell what this feels like sometimes it not funny expecially when trying to fix a bug.
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Dude in my Calc 2 class just bitched about iPhones having "shitty software" referencing that bug from around ~6 years ago, when a specific iMessage text would reboot your phone. IMO, 99% of what Apple does well is software. UI is subjective, but final cut pro is unbelievable in terms of functionality for its price, their software is so well optimized that iPhones have been able to use comparably tiny batteries and still compete. They are consistent throughout their company with software design, while companies like Google are so stratified it took years before their material design had been implemented in all their services, there are still a few that aren't (not to mention the meme of Google killing off all their projects). I hate tablets, but the iPad pro has the best software/hardware implementation of any I've ever seen. Apple's interconnectivity between devices is unbelievable, whether it's Continuity features or the setup process just recognizing group devices around and pulling data to create consistent account info and saving you taps. Siri is shit, but apart from that their software isn't bad enough that you should complain about that instead of...
Their Macs are fucking pressure-cookers, and their fuckin marketing department is like a different company all-together, and their anti-fix-it-yourself policies are so user hostile that they're toe-to-toe with being as abusive to customers as Oracle.
TL;DR the biggest scam Apple has pulled off is not that the sheep still think Android and PC users are living in 2010, but they've convinced the sheep that they know what shitty software is. At that point they're too many levels deep and there is no red-pill strong enough for them.2 -
Whenever my wife applies occam's razor to my problem solving or pointedly remarks "you update it, you fix it...mr. penguin"3
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To all the people using 1080p external monitors on macos mojave, did you notice that the fonts are now shitty?
I wrote a script to fix it. (Uses the fix provided in the forums and makes it work for ext displays and retina).
https://github.com/gauravat16/...4 -
Ive never been able to use rails console because I could never resolve an error.
I spent about a day on three separate occasions trying to fix it.
The last time I tried, I gave up and decided I would just live without rails console.
Its been months now and I decided to try, just for the hell of it.
It works?
It works!!
Why does it work now and not before?! -
Lay out exactly how you want a jr dev to fix his code, only to have him ignore all of it except that a certain library will be used in the fix.
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Product owners not testing/validating bug reports and just passing us the email like
"Here, now fix it"1 -
Haha fuckers fucking hell! Last post was about Factorio not starting. Guess what. My hard drive failed. Fuck. Razer wanted to wipe the computer to fix the rattling noise inside. I told them fuck off you should be able to fix it anyways. Guess they might as well wipe it all clean now...1
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Spent like 2 days trying to fix a problem that caused failing tests and outdated test lib...
But just realized I could just fix it with a simple hack... basically a test mode flag2 -
When you try to fix an error for hours and in the end you manage to fix it but the way you fixed it shouldn't work at all.
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don't you just love it when you have to fix a system that consists on unnecessary junk code, horrible/lack of indentation, no documentation and the clients says "I don't know what happened fix it and I'll post you good"
I mean, I live for this shit man! -
I keep getting phone calls from what I assume are people in foreign countries using a VoIP service and my public info to get me to apply for jobs that probably don't exist.
I just wanna design/develop cool stuff for the rest of my life but this is aggravating 😑5 -
Finished my programming quiz but couldn't fix the bug.
Right after submission, found the solution to fix the bug and it was just to remove "-1" -
Debugging my resume built with some simple js/jQuery functions
Took 30 minutes
Missing a comma and semicolon I didn't even remove
I didn't know any other appropriate reaction so I just threw up instead -
Gotta love it when the problem you have with an unfamiliar OSS project is so easy to fix that you can do it yourself
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How to fix the “Service Battery” Warning on Mac ? I have done the prescribed method before— reset SMC and recalibrate battery. It only hides the warning for a certain amount of time. I am looking for a more permanent fix.3
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