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HR - There is a 2 years gap on your CV!
Candidate - I was in jail.
HR - Why?
Candidate:- I killed the guy who told me : "We'll call you back".
HR :- Welcome on board, You have the Job.6 -
Me: *programming*
Team: *furiously discussing something outside of my expertise*
Me: *programming*
Team: *finally acknowledging my existance* "Yeah, dude. We are going to delete te project and start over because we can't fix this issue [which we have never ever discussed with you]."
Me: "What, that's stupid."
Team: "Well, do you have any bright ideas to fix it?"
Me: "Gimme until tomorrow."
Me: *programming*
Team: *doing absolutly nothing*
Me: "I fixed it!"
Team: "Why didn't you do that a week ago?"
Me: "You didn't ask..."
And so goes te story of how i was almost killed by an angry mob.13 -
The programmer who killed people: Not so talented programmer named John, made a mistake in his code. because of this mistake the program users spent 15 minutes to do a workaround. this program had 10 million users. In general the users spent 150 million minutes because of john's mistake, which is 2.5 million hours. if a person sleeps about 8 hours a day, he have 16 active hours. which means john wasted 156,250 human days that equals to 427.8 human years. people leave approx. until the age of 64, that means John just killed 6.68 people because of his bug. So john, how do you sleep at night?10
-
Two weeks ago:
customer - we need a small website, nothing special. Give us your cheapest option
*proceeds and give them the cheapeast offer, the accept and deploy their site*
Today:
I "notice" a spike in trafic, 20k request / second, and many sessions had 60-70 MB (big videos on the site) in size which cause the gateway to die and almost killed the entire hosting platform.
"Nothing special" turns out to be a website for a big campaign that they are currently running on TV, Radio, Paper and AdWord.10 -
I go to unlock my car, but the button I usually use is gone. Instead now it unlocks by long-pressing the car handle.
Ok, got it.
Then my ignition isn't there? Oh, it's in the middle of the steering wheel now? Ok.. but it doesn't work? Oh I have to sign in with Google or Facebook, alright...
Wait, where's my odometer? Oh this is "card" view, and I guess I want "compact" view, huh. Is there a dark theme? Guess not.
Why can't I shift? Oh the stick is a hamburger button now, weird. Um, and reverse is in a sub-menu? That's going to get annoying.
Alright just need to look in the mirror to see if.. wtf? You call this "responsive" or something? I can't see out that tiny window.
I'm very disappointed in all this, I wonder if I can roll back. Oh WHERE ARE THE BRAKES OH GOD
UX DESIGNERS
HAVE
FUCKING
KILLED ME
WHY DID WE TRUST THEM AND THEIR GODFORSAKEN UPDATES10 -
Years ago we had a visit from a startup company developing a firewall and I got the chance to talk with one of their devs.
He explained the subtleties of security holes in websites and after I said something about our site being secure thanks to being behind a firewall he gently asked what would happen if he entered a specially crafted test into one of the text fields ... and he gave an example ...
I got a chill, went back to my seat and traced what it would do ...
That was when I learned about sql injection and his example would have killed the DB :/
Before going home I designed a way to secure the input which I then refined over a few days.
We still use that today after 17 years.
That one single sentence really showed to never be to proud of our security and I realized how vulnerable our site was.2 -
At my previous job we had the rule to lock your PC when you leave. Makes sense of course.
We were not programmers but application engineers, still, we worked with sensitive data.
One colleague always claimed to be the most intelligent and always demanded the "senior" - title. Which he obviously did not deserve.
multiple times a day forgot to lock his workstation and we had to do it for him.
My last week working there, I've had it. He forgot it again... So I made a screenshot of his current environment. Closed everything. Set his new background with the screen shot and killed explorer (windows). Then finally I locked his PC.
When he came back he panicked that his PC froze. He couldn't do shit anymore. Not knowing what to do... 😂
Which makes him a senior of course.
But seriously, first thing I would do is open the task manager and notice that explorer wasn't running... Thus my background with the taskbar isn't real.... My colleagues must be pranking me!
Nope... The "senior" knew little10 -
🎉 As of today, I can proudly count myself among the members of the "Killed Prod on A Friday Afternoon" club. 🎉16
-
The inevitable happened, the user that I've answered tons of questions about freelancing deleted his account, thankfully I took backups and will recreate it [together with a killed joke] in the comments below (should've just webarchived it, meh)
I'll keep adding questions & answers I come across to make this a useful resource for people that want to get into freelancing, want to ask me something in the comments, you name it.
Might compile it into a better searchable resource eventually (some sort of blog with TOC), but right now neither do I have the time nor will to do that.
Wish I could have taken over the link that has been now posted a lot, but every post has an ID and I doubt it's possible, will tag dfox to clarify though and also floydian and devtea, that have been so nice to always post a link to that one rant.
52 -
And then one day you wake up and discover that your first boss,
the one who hired you when you had no experience
who believed in you when nobody else did
and also paid you a full decent payment when the rest of the world tried to pay you less than half the amount
who taught you a lot about the business and even when you disagreed, it was impossible to get angry because he was calm and gentle always
and treated you so many lunches and dinners
…was beaten and killed by a former colleague…
I have no words…
Sayonara 👋 boss
I will miss you so much on this Earth 😢3 -
Technical Interviewer: "You killed it, and flew right through this. I'm seriously impressed."
Me: "Is this real life?"5 -
My company wants to start using Node.JS.
JavaScript.
They wanna use JavaScript.
For everything.
JAVASCRIPT.
FOR EVERYTHING.
Scene;
**Asshat enters break room after meeting**
**Asshat turns to Asshole**
Asshat: “Oh here in a year or two we’ll just be rewriting all of this is Node.JS.”
Asshole: “JavaScript. You’ll be rewriting it in JavaScript. And fucking WHY?”
Asshat: “It’s better”
Asshole: “It’s not really a general use language. Why wouldn’t you guys choose Python if you wanted to write EVERYTHING in a goddamn scripting language?”
Asshat: “Google uses Node.JS”
Asshole: “For back-end web development type stuff. I doubt their accounting systems are written in fucking JavaScript...”
Asshat: “Python is oooooold.”
Asshole (to himself): No you’re old, you stupid, ancient fuck.
**Asshole rolls his eyes and walks away**
**Asshat continues his ignorant chuckling**
End Scene;
Clearly years of fixed format RPG programming has killed too many of Asshat’s brain cells.12 -
The bad thing today: I killed my laptop with coffee.
The good thing today: it was my company laptop, not my private one.17 -
!rant && sarcasm
For a long time now I've been trying to convince people to use secure communication. I'm used to getting called "paranoid", but the killer phrase always was (and still is): "Why do you want me to encrypt my communication, I HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE, so I don't care who's reading it" - "It's not about hiding something, it's about private stuff staying private" - "Yeah, whatever"
"I have nothing to hide". That always killed the conversation... until I asked them to hand me their phones, unlocked, for 5 minutes.
"No" - "Why? I thought, you had nothing to hide and don't care who's reading it?" - "Uhmmm..."
More and more people around me are popping up in my Signal contact list.
Looks like they suddenly care a lot about private stuff staying private </sarcasm>12 -
Get really motivated to make something at 1am.
Pulls out laptop, earphones go in.
Types first line of code, girlfriend wakes up, complains about the lowest screen brightness with dark theme being too bright.
Motivation killed.5 -
I’m the embodiment of lazy...
I had turned on the TV in the living room earlier and put on sesame st. for my daughter to watch.
Some time passes, I’m trying to work in the back bedroom, have daughter in my arms and she’s falling asleep. I forgot to turn off the TV in the front room.
Didn’t want to get up from my desk so I just wrote up a powershell script to connect to the computer plugged into the TV and kill chrome. (The Computer sleeps after 10 minutes, and the TV shuts off after 10 more minutes of no display signal).
Script was successful as I heard Elmo laughing, then suddenly all was quiet 🤫7 -
Yesterday, my girlfriend caught a virus. There were 5+ running programs, in program files, program files x86, system32, basically everywhere. The virus modified chrome, firefox, edge (and even installed a false uc browser assuming we had one), there are many entries at startup programs, also running daemons, once you kill one of them, the others detect it and replicate their killed fellows. Tried to run a linux live usb disk for a cleanup, but the computer hibernates instead of shutdown, making modifications on disk risky.
I spent hours trying to suppress the processes, do a manual cleanup and antivirus search. It looked all cleaned up, then I reinstalled chrome, and now it switches its homepage everytime I open it, it also injects batch arguments to desktop link forum chrome (deleting it manually does not help, it comes back). I'm a linux guy, and in a few hours, I hated windows more than ever.
If anybody knows the authors, I *really* want to meet them. I promise I'm not going to punch them, but kneel down, bow my head in respect, and say "teach me master."14 -
Me: Can you lift an elephant with one hand?
Bing: You really can't because even the strongest human cannot lift an elephant that has one hand.
Yahoo: Elephant FC vs Oklahoma City - today 15:00GMT.
Baidu: 你不能 你不能 that is how you can.
Yandex.ru: Americans killed the Elephant whilst pointing hands at Russian spy.
DuckDuckGo: Elephants have privacies too and lifting one can bridge DDG policies.
Ask.com: Lifting an elephant is a Metaphor.
AOL.com: No result yet. Subscribe to our Newsletter to get latest updates.
Google: (google.com) wants to access your location.5 -
Software just destroyed half a year worth of work today. God bless developers. I'm getting myself a psychologist over a broken fucking server. Because software fucking killed it. And killed me with it. Do I really have to build everything from component to end product myself? Without even being a developer?15
-
So, I'm using a new MacBook Air (running Sierra), and while I'm still getting used to it (especially the different Sublime hotkeys), overall it really is quite wonderful. I particularly love the magic touchpad and ease of scrolling/swiping between desktops.
However, I ran into an issue this morning that gave me pause: apparent file caching.
My webpack setup auto-compiles my project when files change, and I noticed something was causing errors -- not really surprising since I was in the middle of fixing the project last night. However, the error it displayed wasn't something I was expecting, and referenced a line I was positive I had removed several hours before calling it a night. Whatever, I was probably mistaken, so I went to remove it.
... It wasn't there.
I double checked that I was looking at the right file. Yep, src/styles/header.scss -- that's the correct file. Figuring webpack was acting up, I killed and restarted it.
Same error.
So whatever, maybe Sublime cached it. Rather unexpected, but possible, and I am on a mac now... so maybe. So, I closed the file and reopened it. The line wasn't there. I did this twice more. It STILL wasn't there. Maybe I'm going crazy...? I checked the file with cat. The line was there. I checked with vim. The line was still there.
OKAY. I've seen a lot of people with beef with Sublime, and I often defended it. but maybe they're actually right. maybe Sublime really isn't the way to go. :( So, I killed and reopened Sublime, and I checked the file again.
The line STILL ISN'T THERE.
Maybe I'm going crazy? I double, triple, quadruple checked the path. all correct.
Alright; let's try again and make sure I do it properly. I closed everything I had open in sublime (two projects), and quit. I reopened Sublime, navigated to the correct path, and reopened the file...
The offending line STILL wasn't there.
I'm angry at this point and just mash the keyboard. I save the resulting garbage, and cat the file again. No visible changes.
KAJSFLK STUPID PIECE OF <redacted>
okay, whatever. Reboots fix everything, right? So I reboot, and keep the option to re-open everything again ticked.
The terminal comes back up, along with half(?) my browsers, but Sublime doesn't. grrrrrrr.
so I cat the damn thing.
GUESS WHAT.
THE GARBAGE IS THERE.
Sublime was doing its job. BUT EVERYTHING ELSE FAILED.
(Oh Sublime, why did I ever question you? 💚)
... but seriously, what the fuck could have caused that? Was the OS caching the file for some programs, but not others? Now I'm questioning the macbook...23 -
So, I set up my computer after moving and settling in.
Turns out all the jostling killed the pump on my water cooler 🙁 It now sounds like an unmaintained soviet train at full speed, and starts burning up. Poor thing.
Guess it’s time to build a new one. Though parts aren’t exactly available right now...
Bleh.24 -
Guy: - "Your restart script doesn't work."
Me: - "What do you mean?"
Guy: - "It does nothing."
Me: - "It should kill every processes that's running within the project and start them again. Wait... Why do you terminate it?"
Guy: - "I don't. It just stops."
Me: - "It says `Terminated` here. You killed it. Just let it do it's job, don't kill it."
Guy: - "I'm not killing it! It just stops!"
(...two hours later...)
Me: - "Wait... Where do you run it from?"
Guy: - "What do you mean? I just run the script you gave me."
Me: - "Yeah, but where do you run it from? Where did you put it?"
Guy: - "It's part of the project so I put it in the project, d'oh!"11 -
I feel guilty for being such a murderer.
I killed Cortana so many times over, but her ghost keeps coming back to haunt me.1 -
Only pussies celebrate Christmas today. Real men celebrate the day John Wick killed three men in a bar with a pencil. A fucking pencil.10
-
The company I work for has decided instead of building our own CMS (which was mostly done when they killed it), we should instead build a Chrome extension to extend Shopify's admin panel and implement all of the features it was missing. We warned them very thoroughly about how morally wrong this is at it's core and will require a lot of dev time to get this going and has risk of breaking if Shopify changes something in their admin panel. And yet they rely on this more and more every day.2
-
We were doing a project for uni in which we had to make a game in Java, we were on my department the night before working the last bits, it was working perfectly, until two hours until we had to turn it in, when I ran the code on IntelliJ it worked but the .jar file I exported didn't work and I didn't know why... I had to carry the my desktop PC I was working on because my laptop was broken at the time and we didnt have another computer on hand with IntelliJ and shit, I could swear I could see my friends laughing...
Two hours later from presenting the project I realized someone changed the file of a name from spritebatch1.png to Spritebatch1.png...
Changed it back, worked in an instant...
They were all behind me and started laughing like the best joke in the world was told...
I almost killed them all, but laughed along them afterwards...7 -
Hey, how about we boost our dev team morale by giving them this cool project instead of these usual crud bullshit they deal everyday?
Nooo, let's pay some fucking amateur agency 5x they wage during 4 months to do it like a low IQ noob and expect them to maintain it later.1 -
Life Before the Computer
An application was for employment
A program was a TV show
A cursor used profanity
A keyboard was a piano!
Memory was something that you lost with age
A CD was a bank account
And if you had a 3-inch floppy
You hoped nobody found out!
Compress was something you did to garbage
Not something you did to a file
And if you unzipped anything in public
You'd be in jail for awhile!
Log on was adding wood to a fire
Hard drive was a long trip on the road
A mouse pad was where a mouse lived
And a backup happened to your commode!
Cut - you did with a pocket knife
Paste you did with glue
A web was a spider's home
And a virus was the flu!
I guess I'll stick to my pad and paper
And the memory in my head
I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash
But when it happens they wish they were dead!3 -
GIT LOG VERSION 101
----------------
75fed18 pay no attention to the man behind the curtain
56772ff added security.
6374fdd needs more cow bell
6b27de9 Committing fixes in the dark, seriously, who killed my power!?
bffce8a giggle.
7e93977 Refactored configuration.
e66c495 pgsql is more strict, increase the hackiness up to 11
5690dd9 Revert "just testing, remember to revert"
daa84ba Still can't get this right...
097f164 this should fix it
367f271 GIT :/
f46d735 bump to 0.0.3-dev:wq
b893721 ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
24be0d9 ...
f014a0c ALL SORTS OF THINGS
e648b80 added super-widget 2.0.
3a71628 perfect...
e2a8cb1 Fucking templates.
b08e489 pgsql is more strict, increase the hackiness up to 113 -
Man im so burnt out i cant function properly...ive been balls deep in 5 assignments all due next week for what feels like an eternity
Stress killed my immune system...cant sleep...sick af
Kill me pls5 -
Startup culture.
Most suicidal cults are healthier than any given startup.
The ones that aren't have already killed all of its members.5 -
Just logged in to my old Bitbucket account.
It's a huge cemetery of side projects..
Some of them are unknown now..
Some others were glorious..
And some of them were killed by other projects, loosing the war of side projects..
RIP my old projects.. RIP2 -
Me: *kills process*
Linux: 3243 killed.
Me: "sudo netstat -ntlp | grep 3243"
Linux: 3243 running.
* hour later *
Me: *kills process with 3045974th method*
Linux: 3243 killed.
Me: "sudo netstat -ntlp | grep 3243"
Linux: 3243 running.
Me: "Are you absolutely FUCKING kidding me?! What is this fucking thing, the god damn grim reaper? I've done some SKETCHY fucking things at the terminal to kill this BASIC fucking server and it is still running!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?!"
Manager: *peeks in helpfully* "Did you try the 'kill' command?"15 -
I found out last week that I was passed up for a promotion not because I didn't deserve it but because I got one last year.
My manager asked to have me promoted. People on other teams wanted me promoted. HR did not.
I wasn't mad about it at the time but the more that I think about it the more it's getting me down. I've been pushing myself trying to prove that I would be good for the position and now I have lost all motivation and I hate it. I like where I am at and I like what I do but this has really killed it for me. I'm struggling to get anything done now.6 -
This freaking laptop.
The WiFi randomly stops working -- and by that, I mean the hardware is no longer detectable, let alone functional. It simply disappears on boot, even from dmesg.
The same happens with audio and bluetooth: on some boots they simply do not exist.
The power usage is also ridiculous: the battery dies in about two hours, and it gets soo hot. Toasty wrists unless I use my tiny bluetooth keyboard ☹ So I need to fiddle with powertop a bit more.
nVidia drivers are also a bloody pain, and having two graphics cards this is even more difficult to set up. I still haven't managed. (nvidia-driver, bumblebee, optimus, official driver messes, manual xorg configs, ...). So I have a beautiful 4k built-in display running at 4-18 fps, and a non-functional 4k external. That's fine for now, but >.>; frustrating.
In better news! I just managed to get the sound to work by backporting the new 4.19 kernel (yay!) -- I have never been so happy to hear an ad. but fixing the sound killed my bluetooth. (The `bluetooth` utility reports the adapter is present, but nothing else can seem to see it 🙄) So now I'm going to have burning hot wrists all day and want to cry because terrible sweaty awfulness.
Just. It's frustrating.
It's fast, though.
and ever so pretty.28 -
!rant
I'm an idiot. I freely admit this. I spent a solid 3 hours on a new endpoint in a WCF service, only to have it looked upon and told to fix it. I knew that the service I was calling didn't work like that. I did, I knew it. I didn't think about it while coding the endpoint, but I knew it. At least the changes only needed to happen in one file, and only took about 25 minutes with tests and all. But damn it, I knew better. I looked at my buddy, straight in the eye, and told him "Told you I was an idiot." He laughed, I laughed, the table laughed, we killed the table. It was a great time!1 -
that really killed me today when i sat in the office
how good can you rant with your colleagues? i don't think i would survive long without this kind of therapy xD
2 -
Worst technology I've ever worked with?
Microsoft-FUCKING-Access
The error riddled, varchar frenzy, disgusting ui, os and architecture dependent pieces of shit, powered by the cherry on top: fucking VBA, that are applications developed with this monstrosity have kept me awake trying to understand why on earth would anyone that is not dying of cancer already would use such thing to try to build anything.
I had to deal with load of Access applications when I first started at my current company. Whats left now are mainly legacy systems, I killed them one by one and whatever's left will suffer the same punishment.
If you develop in Access you're my enemy and I will destroy you.6 -
i rant that i live in a dictatorship with an idiot president who bans whatsapp and facebook to prevent protests (in reaction to having arrested opposition party members of parliament), and github (yes, github) to prevent the spread of a minister's leaked e-mails. now the government is seriously considering shutting down vpn services to prevent by-passing the bans.
on the other hand, it's a nice time and place to continue ms studies on ad-hoc networks - that is of course if i can avoid being arrested or killed before i even start my thesis.9 -
So... After reading up on the theoretical stuff earlier, I decided to make a real AI that can identify handguns and decide whether it's a revolver or a semiautomatic with 95 percent accuracy...
Well, basically, I been browsing my local gun store's online store for four hours for training data, killed a Mac mini while first training the system and I think I ended on the domestic terrorism watch list... Was that black sedan always there?
Anyway... It's working fairly accurate, my monkey wrench is a revolver by the way.
Isn't AI development a wonderful excuse for all kinds of shit?
"why do you have 5000 pictures of guns on your computer?" - "AI development"
"why did you wave around a gun in front of your web cam" - "AI development"
"why is there a 50 gram bag in your desk?" - "AI development"
Hmm... yeah well... I think it might work. I could have picked a less weird testing project, but... No.7 -
After months of development, testing, testing and even more testing the app was ready for deployment to production. Happy days, the end was in sight!
I had a week's leave so I handed over the preparation for deployment to my Senior Developer and left it in his capable hands while I enjoyed the sun and many beers.
I came back on the day of deployment and proudly pressed the deploy button. Hurrah!
Not long after I got loads of phone calls from around the country as the app wasn't working. What madness is this?! We tested this for months!
Turns out my Senior didn't like the way I'd written the SQL queries so he changed them. Which is obviously both annoying and unprofessional, but even worse he got a join wrong so the memory usage was a billion times more and it drained the network bandwidth for the whole site when I tried to debug it.
I got all the grief for the app not working and for causing many other incidents by running queries that killed the network.
So...much... rage!!!3 -
Cool, so it looks like updating my nVidia drivers somehow killed LUKS on my machine? or whatever happens immediately after decrypting the volume group; honestly can’t tell.
To the uninitiated, this means my machine no longer boots. Like, at all.
Looks like I’m spending tomorrow reverting. 😕10 -
Soo I am the only tech-guy in my family and it's a bit like:
Other: You do program?
Me: yes?
Other: pls repair my printer!
And you guys know how awful that is, aren't you? But in my family it gets tougher...
Today my older sister asked me how to save data from a broken HDD. I said I know a guy who's doing forensic on HDDs and he could make that.
She's like: "but a friend of mine said it could be done easier with software"
And yes, it is! But not that successful...
Now's the point she killed me instantly!
She said: "he opened the HDD and said the disks look fine they could be easily added to a new HDD"....
WHAT THE ACUTAL FUCK I SAID NOW YOUR DRIVE IS BROKEN FOREVER! AND THEN SHE INSULTED ME AND BLOCKED ME ON FUCKING WHATSAPP! SHE IS LEARNING WEBDESIGN WHY THE FUCK DON'T TEACH HER THE BASICS OF FUCKING COMPUTERS! Oh for fuck sakes....3 -
Wow, I just realized the marketing teams of most of the companies I have been dealing with are some cold sociopaths.
Every other letter that pops in the mailbox is filled with dark patterns trying to guilt me into opting in to their continued spam:
Subject: Most awesome husky puppy!
Look at this beautiful husky puppy. Isn't it beautiful.... It would be sad if something happened to it... But I am afraid... Something will happen to it...
If you don't opt in to our email message... I am afraid we have no choice... We have to kill this puppy. End it's life... We have no choice. I wish we did! Nothing would please us more than keeping this beautiful-beautiful puppy living and playing....
But if you don't opt in... We have to cut it's throat. Leave it lying on the ground, bleeding out as the life slowly fades away from it's pretty blue eyes...
And Remember: it's not us who killed it... IT WAS YOU! YOUR ACTIONS LEAD TO THE DEATH OF THIS PUPPY! YOU.... YOU FILTHY MURDERER!
Pls opt-in ok, then we are all good. Puppy lives! Just opt in. Ok? Yeah, you know what you have to do.3 -
Threaded API Calls, or rather:
How I killed five server instances in one shot..
Creating 50000 Threads sounds like a good idea in general, the bad part starts when you use start() in a for loop to run them all at once.
No further comments your honor...7 -
Is this learning job cpu intensive or memory intensive?
I don't know and I don't give a flying fuck, because it's 6:20pm and I have not found any of my favorite servers free to rerun this shit the whole fucking week, so this server (which I have actually killed before, btw) can suck a dick and do its fucking job.
🎤🖐️11 -
Finally finished the screwdriver followup ticket. I think.
I spent almost two full days (14 hours) on a seemingly simple bug on Friday, and then another four hours yesterday. Worse yet: I can’t test this locally due to how Apple notifications work, so I can only debug this on one particular server that lives outside of our VPN — which is ofc in high demand. And the servers are unreliable, often have incorrect configuration, missing data, random 504s, and ssh likes to disconnect. Especially while running setup scripts, hence the above. So it’s difficult to know if things are failing because there’s a bug or the server is just a piece of shit, or just doesn’t like you that day.
But the worst fucking part of all? The bug appeared different on Monday than it did on Friday. Like, significantly different.
On Friday, a particular event killed all notifications for all subsequent events thereafter, even unrelated ones, and nothing would cause them to work again. This had me diving through the bowels of several systems, scouring the application logs, replicating the issue across multiple devices, etc. I verified the exact same behavior several times over, and it made absolutely no sense. I wrote specs to verify the screwdriver code worked as expected, and it always did. But an integration test that used consumer-facing controller actions exhibited the behavior, so it wasn’t in my code.
On Monday while someone else was watching: That particular event killed all notifications but ONLY FOR RELATED EVENTS, AND THEY RESUMED AFTER ANOTHER EVENT. All other events and their notifications worked perfectly.
AKL;SJF;LSF
I think I fixed it — waiting on verification — and if it is indeed fixed, it was because two fucking push event records were treated as unique and silently failing to save, run callbacks, etc.
BUT THIS DOESN’T MATCH WHAT I VERIFIED MULTIPLE TIMES! ASDFJ;AKLSDF
I’m so fucking done with this bs.8 -
I dislike the way Oracle deals with Java(for the most part) and believe it to be a really power hungry company full of assholes.
I do; however, know that business is business, i get it. I really do.
To bad they own one of my main languages but at the same time thank heavens for the OpenJDK
https://headcrashing.wordpress.com/...
This has got to be some sort of guerilla negotiation techniques level shit man.16 -
Been working for a while with some terrible code with no documentation that I just inherited from a previous employee
Topic: multi-threaded program in Python
Goal: kill both parent and children with keyboard interrupt
Intuitive idea: check in children processes if parent still alive
Implemented idea:
- parent creates socket connection
- keyboard interrupt kills parent and thus the socket connection as well
- children receive some specific socket error from the loss of connection
- children catch the exception and are killed
In Python 2, of course
I, too, like to inflict pain on myself for fun7 -
Hey guys.
Sorry for the absence.
So... Lately I've been working in shifts, doing extra hours and stuff... And today, Saturday I went to work for nothing... My boss fucked me just to make me go to work, when there isn't much work to be done...
Btw, I have a burn out for more than two years because I had to work and study and sleep for 4 hours a night, for months.... (check my profile for more info).
Today I had enough
Almost got killed while driving... felt asleep.
I'm saturated.
Monday I'll talk to the owner of the company
and If I don't like what I ear I'm making several complaints:
- One for the organization that protects workers
- One for the work court (we have that In Portugal)
- And one criminal complaint... After all they fucked my health, my life and are putting my life in danger just because...
Lets see how it goes...
Better part... If I make any of the complaints above they can't fire me, make me work overtime or in unpaid shifts...
Oh, and someone else also made a complaint recently... Governement oficials spent two days this week checking the company accounts and calling workers for confidencial intervews...
So, I guess It's the perfect time to drop the bomb on them.10 -
43, I was in college with chance for an scholarship. Got instructed to get the best possible grades, and teachers kept telling me to do better. Did 3 tests in a row, and went to hospital in the 4th one. Doctor said that the amount of coffee and meds I had took could've killed me if I was not lucky.
P.S.: After I got my grades and asked about my scholarship I was told that they gave it to another person that was "more stable" and "healthy"...
P.S.: I don't know if this counts as working6 -
So I've been working a lot with Docker lately (who isn't) and there was this one service always DIEING on me.
Docker logs showed me that it was killed because the container was unhealthy.
I researched for a whole day and couldn't find it...
After I got home it hit me like a hammer...
The healthcheck uses basic Auth and the password was changed yesterday...
How the fuck could I start to try every shit before I even checked if the request done by the healthcheck is working...
FUCK ME I'M SUCH A MORON SOMETIMES7 -
Job seeking is mentally and emotionally tiring.
Done several skill tests that I think I killed every single one of them.
I've heard "Can you go through your resume?" a million times, 1 company hasn't said yes or no for 1 month, I have at least 2 job interviews a week. Recruiters low balling.
I also feel that being hispanic is more challenging. They think I didn't code anything back when I was living in my country. 10 years of experience reduced to the ones I've been working in the US.
It's been a long and tedious journey.
Thanks for bear with me up to this point...19 -
right to repair is dead in cali and canada because Apple and CompTIA lobbied
cali: https://theverge.com/2019/5/...
canada: https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/...
apple can suck my 3-inch dick10 -
> Startup: ok listen up, we got this super cool thing we want to do with Twilio. Doesn't get any easier: some calls to book a restaurant, you ask for booking data and save that on some db.
> iHateForALiving: I'm on it. We got a couple weeks of development, never worked with Twilio, but should be easy enough
> Startup: Hold it big guy, we can't just write code like this. There's this OTHER developer with a super cool framework he wrote himself, it supports OAuth2 and multitenancy, written in Huskell, microservices to authenticate several apps all working concurrently in our environment, some orchestrator, cloud computing on AWS, you're going to love it. There's this Postman project with 200-something calls (the ones I need for my project, one and only consumer for those APIs, are 5 including the login)
> iHateForALiving: You are aware you'll have approximately six clients and they'll pay some 30 bucks each per month, aren't you?
> Startup: You don't understand, this infrastructure is CRITICAL for the future of our company
> ffwd 6 months
> iHateForALiving: guys we had this 2 weeks project and it's taking months, I'm ready, what is going on there?
> Startup: someone killed our DB, the OTHER developer pushed on git the access credentials :(
THE FULL MOON IS DRAWING NEAR AND THE FUCKING WERECODERS STRIKE AGAIN! -
Love my computer.
Opened edge(chrome was not responding).
In 2 seconds it crashed and windows killed the process.
❤❤❤2 -
First thing on Monday. The very first thing.
I fucking killed prod.
Reminder to my future self to either stash local config files and .htaccess files... or add them to gitignore... But either way, don't leave them lying around assuming I won't do something dumb and accidentally commit them. Because some fateful Monday morning before I've had my coffee I'm going to do something dumb.8 -
hello devranters,
been a while, past few weeks have been a painful one for me.
I finally got that second monitor and also built the small home server( I'll give details in another rant).
been a lot going on around me, there's a protest going on and a lot of young "unarmed" people including children killed, lots of gory images, all we were asking for was to stop police brutality, they're still shooting at people. it's a lot going on here. I can't even concentrate. I took some time off social media because all the bodies I was seeing was beginning to get into my head.
I really can't Express how I feel right now. we were expecting the international community(I really dont know who exactly) to come to our aid, lol
It's all over Twitter. images, videos, everything.
I just hope everything gets better.
the image is my new setup. I just log hello world on the console and that's all I do with it.
my table is basically two wooden slabs supported by textbooks on chairs(at last I found use for them since I never read them in school ). server is under the table.
keep us in your prayers. thanks
7 -
I can't always check my phone at work but I can still get devRant notifications on my Moto 360. Well I checked my watch so much today that I killed the battery before 4pm. Now I have to sneak to the bathroom to check notifications for the next hour.
-
Why the hell did it take youtube so freaking long to get a dark skin?
My eyes get killed without it @ 2am looking at a tutorial without a dark skin.
I have had a dark skin installed via userscript for over 5 years.
Now they need to implement some of the features youtube+ has...8 -
Great.
I have a demo in an hour for which I need to make some final code changes and tests (about half an hour’s work), and just discovered that XCode killed itself. 🤦🏻♀️
Looks like I’m missing the demo.12 -
Damn simulation.
Some juniors grabbed keyboard and reprogrammed main species to stay at home and fear of death while I was busy working with other features.
Moreover someone made additional changes from infected computer and guess what....
Unfortunately it’s real time system with increasing entropy and we can’t revert changes so fixing damn shit would take from one to two decades.
We don’t have backups cause last time we used them we also killed dinosaurs.
It would be just easier to erase everything and start from beginning cause our statistics charts are fucked up - again but motherfucker boss don’t want to do it.
He’d rather teleport again to adjust the world. Damn fucker thinks he’s god but in fact he’s just prick with rich parents.
I’ve decided to piss him off by adjusting planet thermostat so we can start over.
2 years more and changes would be irreversible.
Damn job.6 -
😵 help - I totally fucked up.
I managed to delete my /dev/sda1 partition with gparted while trying to format an USB-Stick...
Now my laptop not even trys to boot. It only opens BIOS without any boot options. I absolutely have no idea how to fix that shit. 😣😰51 -
Reviewing code in a project, found this one:
# Todo: Fix horrible parent member check. People may have been killed for better code
-- horrible code here -- -
Baaaahhhhh!!! I just stepped on my UPS power button and killed my machine after spending considerable time working out the plan for a new tool to add to our system.5
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The moment the first news article was published in my country about covid cases decreasing (it isn't actually decreasing btw), these motherfucking sweatshops just swarm in like a pack of fucking hyenas to open up and get their employees killed again.
What the fuck is up with this sweatshop bullshit attitude of "Devs won't work unless I micromanage them in person" you twats? My productivity has literally doubled the entire time I was at home.
And this sickening, narcissistic email about how we're supposed to enthusiastically go for work and meet our friends and increase productivity, yay, jesus fucking christ, my apartment has two ongoing cases. Try living in the real world some times you HR troglodytes. -
Messenging with a friend about me working with VBA on a side project.
Me: VBA brings back bad behaviour
Him: Like?
Me: I_AM_KONSTANT and this is a _globalVariable.
Him: Hahaha^^
[...]
Me: Mister O. ...
Him: Mister M. ?
Me: Should i use goto?
Him: I think we need to break off contact.
Him: If you had said you killed someone. Ok.
Him: But GOTO?
[...]
Me: I did it. And then a cold shiver ran down my back.
Him: You deserve that!
____________________
( translate from German )4 -
Killed the backend production db of my app with a dev ops guy for 20 hours.
The emails I received were not the nicest of all time.1 -
I feel so guilty.
I had to make a hotfix today. It is the ugliest piece of shit code I ever intentionally created. But there was no other way. I swear there was no other fucking way!
My boss just assigned this to me. But because she thinks this needs to be a hotfix and can't wait for the next release we just have to change the server and not the client side of our application.
So I had to add a memory to our server so that it knows from which high level method from the client the multiple low level calls to it are coming from.
It just doesn't make sense logically.
I mean I feel like I killed someone. And just so that we get less writes to our DB. I mean yes in some edge cases it is a huge speed-up...
But nothing this fix solves is a new bug.
I'm gonna take a shower now. For like an hour3 -
Just tried to install the english language pack for Visual Studio 2015 Enterprise (the thousands of bucks edition). Well... the setup displayed "DEU" for german and later tried to switch to "EN" resulting in "ENU". First WTF moment.
But what really killed me was the error message... please restart the PC BEFORE the installation? Just wow.
9 -
When I see bunch of errors in my code this badass guy comes in my mind who spend 22 years just to break a mountain who killed his wife.
Salute to such badass!!!
You can read more about him here :-
https://quora.com/What-is-the-most-...
11 -
What if Verizon acquired Yahoo knowing that Net Neutrality would’ve been killed so they could slow Google down and force you to use Yahoo?3
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If everyone on devrant was in a bar fight, what would they do?
I would run around and get killed...109 -
I get an email about an hour before I get into work: Our website is 502'ing and our company email addresses are all spammed! I login to the server, test if static files (served separately from site) works (they do). This means that my upstream proxy'd PHP-FPM process was fucked. I killed the daemon, checked the web root for sanity, and ran it again. Then, I set up rate limiting. Who knew such a site would get hit?
Some fucking script kiddie set up a proxy, ran Scrapy behind it, and crawled our site for DDoS-able URLs - even out of forms. I say script kiddie because no real hacker would hit this site (it's minor tourism in New Jersey), and the crawler was too advanced for joe shmoe to write. You're no match for well-tuned rate-limiting, asshole!1 -
Accidentally killed the ssh deamon on the prod server. I meant to kill my local sshd but confused the terminal tabs :#
-
Data scientist and related devs, how do you handle large datasets?
I was given a .txt file containing +1M edges of a directed graph. I tried to analyze it with networkx, but my computer killed the process as it was eating too much CPU/memory.
I would be grateful for any advice!23 -
Guess what was running and then killed
Yes it was Android studio building, however; it seemed it was trying to fill RAM and forgot what I asked it to do >_>
1 -
Do you remember how they say, you won't notice how much you miss something, until it's gone? Well this Island (Guadeloupe) is as beautiful as it can be! However the internet connection sucks. Big time!
Plus the humidity killed my laptop (or at least part of the keyboard including the keys I need for the partition unlock, which means no laptop until I'm home and replaced the keyboard.
I didn't bring it for work but to be able to look up stuff, maybee write some (non dev) stuff and such...
But to be honest since this vacation is so relaxing, I'm not even really mad. Strange.11 -
My first real exposure to a PC was when my father and me built one for myself. Y'know, some AMD Athlon 64, some MSI board, 2 GB of RAM, an NVIDIA 8600 GT, everything was nice.
I never put malware on that thing even though I heavily used it for things like games, I was really cautious with that even when I was like 6 years old (but my father once accidentally did, he killed it by damaging the filesystem on the harddrive which, funny enough, only took the malware with it)
I still have that PC, but it now has weird issues with memory management ;-; -
I don't want to work on the project at my job anymore. It's an over engineered piece of shit.
I work on my pet project at home, but only for about 20 minutes at a time. After that, I feel the need to walk away and waste my time with other non-productive activities.
How do I get my love for development back? Has the corporate world killed it?5 -
Is it just me, or are the media / journalists once again putting a stupidly unfair pessimistic spin on that SpaceX launch?
"SpaceX rocket launches but explodes shortly into flight"
"Musk's SpaceX big rocket explodes on test flight"
"SpaceX rocket explosion: None injured or killed"
They've said time and time again, it's the first test of a massively complex rocket that's bigger than anything that's ever gone before it, and success is just defined as "getting off the launch pad" and collecting data. They did that and then some.
But instead of spreading excitement about the data, the fact it launched, that it's a world first, etc. - it's all doom and gloom, implying that the whole thing was a failure and people could have died 🙄
And people wonder why I have a low opinion of journalists.15 -
Yesterday I killed a production server with a handful of sites running on it. 😬
Created an observer for one of my Laravel models. It was generating new translated slugs when another post gets translated by an API. While implementing also an updated method besides the created observation I obviously updated the models slug.
Pretty confident this small update will work I just pushed to production. Tested it live.
BOOM
Hard reset on the server redoing the changes. Searching where I fucked up this time...
Finding me observing the updating while updating the updating of the updating by the updating. 🤦4 -
As child: 'When I grew up and earned some money I'm gonna by a full Photoshop-Version.' 😎
Now: 'You cannot buy it fully anymore.' 😫
#ChildhoodDreamsKilledInstantly3 -
Fuck you Mozilla. You have killed the major unique selling point of FF, that being the add-ons, and replaced them with web extensions that will never even come close. Not enough with that, now you're killing the add-on servers to also kick FF forks into their balls. You stupid bunch of wankers have a history of pretending to know better what your users want, and your plummeting market share shows how much you suck at it.
https://blog.mozilla.org/addons/...19 -
What a difference being in the right frame of mind makes.
On Monday I had an interview for a role that I was really keen on, I'd completed a codility test before which I had killed, everything seemed in place. Then I didn't sleep well, had an urgent fire fighting call with my current employer 15 minutes before the interview, I just couldn't focus, I stumbled on some very basic questions, the whole process was torturous.
Today I had an interview for a different, but equally attractive, role. What a difference, I was focused, my answers were clear and thought out, the technical questions were fine, I killed it I think. Pma definitely makes a big difference.1 -
You want to know what shit is?
Go use Alibaba cloud service!
Trying out the service and luckily for me i only paid a few bucks.
-- Poor documentation which seems like it was written by the team from sales.
-- Poor github code samples... If i had written similar code while in college, it would be far better than their code samples... no exaggeration, It literally has 0.1% comment.
See for yourself
https://github.com/aliyun/...
-- Its Object Storage (OSS) C# APIs are all synchronous (Who fucking wrote this piece of shit deserves 10,000 punch in the face). You just killed the whole essence of netcore with oss.
-- Error logs are in Chinese (This was expected but seriously Ali you sold your product in English. WTF you got no English dev)
Coming from an Azure world, i would say Alibaba cloud is still in its infant stage (Cheap to use and Expensive to manage).
Make use of it at your own risk!3 -
VB CreateObject..
Why?!
Cuz it creates an ActiveX object..
So?!
I am using it to manipulate excel files..
Ooohhh...
Yeah, old code, finally getting around to replacing it, probably with something cross platform too.
But in the meantime, I still have to fix remaining bugs or add small features.. Lately just the latter. I manage to do so, even though it takes a lot more time that I'd like to admit as I'm not coding with VB on daily or even monthly basis...so the goddamn ; are everywhere, fucking with me like I killed the pope..
And the code is horendous.. I'm not even sure if it can be done more elegantly, with lesser lines etc.. but to me it feels like I am powertaping a stick to a robot and hoping it will autoconnect and start functioning as a third arm joined with using electric screwdriver to disassemble a watch..3 -
Serverless is server less in the same way a beef burger is vegetarian because you didn't personally see the cow being killed.4
-
When some other team wants to blame us because they're getting a HTTP Status Code 0....
That's not even a valid status... IT MEANS YOU ABORTED THE REQUEST AND KILLED THE CONNECTION...
OH STILL OUR FAULT... WELL DO U KNOW ABOUT NETWORK ISSUES AND SERVER OVERLOADING WHEN U SPAM IT WITH TOO MANY REQUESTS?
OH YOU RETRIED? HOW DID YOU RETRY? BETTER NOT BE SPAMMING US WITH MORE REQUESTS...
EVER HEARD OF TCP/IP BACK OFF LOGIC....4 -
Today I feel like a coding vampire, let me create a new Xamarin project and boOoOost with the code!!
*Creates a clean project, finds 1492 errors* well... f*ck it
4 -
when the client starts asking for so much stupid changes.
Me: Ok sur, I will email you about those changes and the estimate time.
Inside Me: I may look calm, but inside my mind I killed you 5 times with 5 different ways.1 -
Me and my Jewish friend were eating lunch and I farted. He got mad so I said "cmon man a little gas never killed anyone".14
-
I used to love mozilla as a community. The mozilla foundation loved the community and always listened to their voice. Of recent, they've started to turn a deaf ear to the community's voices and have started moving the agenda for a corporate culture. They slowly killed many amazing projects that was mostly run by the community (RIP Firefox OS) and started focusing on more corporate-oriented lobbying and agenda (*cough* Pocket *cough*). I feel that the company is slowly moving toward becoming less of a (community-oriented) foundation and more of a corporation. That path is dangerous and not one that I expected mozilla to take.
Another company worth mentioning was OwnCloud which got forked into Nextcloud because they didn't care about the community enough and put the enterprise customers and their needs ahead of the community's. The disappointed founder of the OwnCloud quit and forked it into NextCloud with the right controls for the community and the users to always be put in the first position.19 -
I have been a developer for a few years and I think I know my shit. Fullstack. I took 2 interview tests recently and received rejections that have completely killed my confidence. I don't want to apply to any new jobs because I am terrified after all these years, I am not as good as I think I am. I have been a dev for about 8 years now when will I be badass 😭9
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Worst experience?
Fourth semester. Programming project.
We were 4 persons, I did almost all the work (including fixing the stuff they broke) but that's not the point.
One of them somehow killed our git repo at least once per weak. It was really annoying, because I had to fix it.
Also he named *all* of his commits 'Pfuschpush' (Pfusch is German for botch). And the code had exactly this quality. I often had to rewrite everything he did (or simply revert the commit).1 -
On the week I went on holiday there was a fire alarm in our data center and the Halon fire suppression system was deployed.
I always miss the excitement.
Apparently our servers rolled over perfectly and we had less than 5 min downtime though, even with 4 killed drives in our SAN. So that's a win.
Kudos to our system administration team, especially the poor bastard who was sat in the data center with his toddler at fuck-my-life-o'clock in the morning.1 -
Privacy peeps, what's your opinion on usage of surveillance for national defence, domestic security, etc. ?
I'm just curious, most privacy-minded people I know generally trip up when confronted with stuff like "yeah, but if surveillance was a thing then that blast which killed 20 people yesterday could have been averted."
I've heard quite a few opinions on both sides, what's yours?18 -
Curiosity killed Ben the cat.
I work in Android Dev. I use scrcpy to control devices remotely. I realized some phones have chrome remote desktop on them...I thought, what if... I open my computer screen on the devices while these devices cast their screen to my computer. Classic mirror loop effect, align to the pixel, staring down the abyss of infinity mirroring... until i took off my earphones to go check this effect on one of the devices.... my computer audio was being played on all devices running chrome remote. :( I feel so stupid1 -
Here we are, three years later. Our system breaks down at the slightest load. An architecture is hardly recognizable anymore. The code consists of methods that have been refactored beyond recognition. The so-called architects came and went, leaving behind an ever-growing fiasco. Wrong decisions are concealed, criticism of them dismissed as ignorance. Our clients are on the verge of having us all killed. Daily crisis meetings are the norm. The remaining developers skulk around the unmaintainable code like emaciated ghosts. Everyone who has even the slightest chance to escape takes a parachute. Our dailies are made up of lies to cover up yesterday's lies. Our Mondays have become days of dread, because that's when the weekend disaster news has to be analyzed. Yet there are still developers who turn a blind eye. Who recommend this and that workaround in a good-humored tone. The code consists only of workarounds. Sarcasm has replaced any normal discussion. Reasonable suggestions on how to basically refactor the whole thing are rejected for cost reasons. In the process, our entire budget is eaten up by maintenance costs. Middle management should be put up against the wall. Why am I still here? This deceptive feeling that one could still turn the tide. This is eating me up.2
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We were having a 30 min discussion about differed tasks and how to kill children spawned by a specific parent if the so said parent is killed, and if in a situation where keeping a parent alive is irrelevant if a child fails, should the child kill the parent and the other children?
Also if a family of tasks spawned from the same parents were canceled, should should I just kill myself or do I take care of the others first?
Or should I concentrate on killing the tasks instead? Which one is easier?3 -
After I received my laser eye surgery, I knew it would become painful after the effect of anesthesia would decrease so I got painkillers in advance.
It was nimesulide.
Even in 2008 ISDB raised a concern about the liver damage and asked for it to be withdrawn worldwide, but I didn't knew it.
So the terrible pain started and I took the pill. Just. One. Pill.
This all started in like fifteen minutes. Eye pain won't go away, but it didn't mattered anymore as I felt really terrible. I never experienced that kind of feeling before and I don't even know how to describe it. It felt like a terrible sensation inside my stomach mixed with an urge to vomit. "This is probably what a liver failure feels like. This is it, I'm going do die here", I remember thinking about as I collapsed.
This whole incident led to an investigation about why the doctors "forgot" to give me proper eye anesthesia drops. This got several doctors fired.
This all got me really interested in how different medications work. I started casually reading popular medical literature and when my depression came, I was prepared, as much as you can even get prepared to a mental disorder.
The thing that probably nearly killed me helped me not to lose my sanity later.4 -
Who’s better at releasing unfinished/half baked projects that are eventually killed in the span of 5 years or less?
In this corner, weighing in at 264 killed projects, undefeated in search engine industry - Google!
And, in this corner, weighing in at 73 killed projects, the murdered of Nokia, Windows RT and soon to (probably) be Surface Duo and Windows 11 on ARM - Microsoft!
I personally think it’s Microsoft - when they do, they kill it in a spectacular way.9 -
(another) Russian roulette for devs
$jobs -l
[1]+ 642 python .....etc
$sudo kill -9 642
.... other commands here
arrow up...arrow up... (looking for jobs -l)... got it.
arrow up...
$kill -9 642
F*uck! (i remember that i have not changed the pid)
kill: no such process (luckly no damages)
anyone killed something relevant making this mistake?6 -
New MacBook Pro: one type of connection port, no MagSafe, base drive is 256gb, and they killed off the goddamn physical esc key.
Apple you dumb.1 -
The mixed feeling when you manage to give orders without giving orders:
- feeling of omnipotence: you worked behind the scenes and you got what you wanted. Nobody knows, but what the hell you are the Puppet Master, God.
- sadness and loneliness: they will never learn. Somebody else claims to have given the orders, nobody knows about you. God is alone after all. And you'll be killed one day.1 -
Ladies and gentlemen... It finally happened... I finally killed a Linux install!
Was stuck at 1024 x 768, installed NVIDIA drivers, crashed, restarted and ended up in an endless login screen loop and then boom, crash and is no longer recognised in Grub.
Don't know what I did seeing as the machine hasn't been on for 3 days ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Guess I'll have to do a reinstall when I have internet again!4 -
You know a server is having a jolly'ol time when, while logging through the serial console, it lags... Then, a few seconds later, you get a message
[time.seconds] Out of memory: Kill process PID (login) score 0 or sacrifice child
[time.seconds] Killed process PID (login) total-vm:65400kB, anon-rss:488kB, file-rss:0kB
10/10, only way to bring the server back to life was by a hard-reset :|3 -
Stackoverflow #1
Me posting question about how to prevent error.
User1: You answered your question. Its because of the error.
Me: I know. And want it gone.
User1: Proposes working yet somehow horrible workaround.
Me: Yes, that works, already did that. But i want to know why it happens.
User: Your question says you want a solution and it is one.
Me: One that doesn't solve the problem.
User2: Just give up. Don't try to find a better one.
Stackoverflow 2:
UserQ: Question how to...?
Me: Use this and that.
UserR: That is not an answer, so i downvoted and requested review.
I don't know a second community that is anti-encouraging like SO. -
Quarantine has killed my soul and control. Started bad habit poker and continuously loosing still not able to stop it...7
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I know, many devs swear on using *NIX based OSes or macOS but really... Windows 10 is very good, never had a single issue or BSOD. If u have issues regarding update reboots then just disable automatic reboots,damn! One single " fuck Windows, killed my workflow cause of updates. Installing Linux know cause I'm too dumb to change a simple setting." >_> and I can play ALL my games... NATIVE!10
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I was happy because I broke 600 points on StackOverflow. Then I saw the post about the guy that reached 1 million and it killed my self confidence2
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I was almost through with a mission on Modern Warfare 3 special ops after being killed a million times but then windows update couldn't fucking wait! Seriously wtf???!4
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Monday morning we found out our main event queue hadn't processed since late Wednesday afternoon. Shit was hitting the fan and we were stumped. What had changed?!?. Why wasn't the queue processor running?!?
Turns out a server restart had killed the job (no worries there, surely?!) but turns out the job checked for a system flag on disk to stop it running multiple instance or in this case as the flag was still present any instance at all. Got to love the little things that really screw you over.6 -
being a dumbass and ran a blocking call then it broke and i can't kill it with ^C :/
killed it later with htop lol im so fucking dumb
also hi first post here
7 -
The fires in australia killed something like half a billion animals, and it's kind of sad, all that potential barbecue going to waste.
We have the means to solve this. With KNAWWWWLEDGE.
What we do is hook up buckets to a bunch of big ass drones and have some sort of contest to see who can put out the most acreage of fire. People will come from all over for the annual "australian fire olympics."
Shit, put a $1 million dollar bounty on "most acreage put out" stream it on twitch, youtube, netflix, you name it.
Fires would be out in a day or three.17 -
I opened devrant with this rant in mind and the first thing i saw is a post about someones boss getting killed...
Fucking hell does someone have good news?
Everywhere i look is pain. Why is this world so cruel!?!?!
Why is there war Why did so many people get killed Why Why Why
My only safe place is while coding, this distracts me from this whole world. I create my own world while coding and dive deep into it. Its one of those things keeping me alive.4 -
Analogy: Assume a JVM is a kingdom, Object is a king of the kingdom, and GC is an attacker of the kingdom who tries to kill the king(object).
When King is Strong, GC can not kill him.
When King is Soft, GC attacks him but King rule the kingdom with protection until resource are available.
When King is Weak, GC attacks him but rule the kingdom without protection.
When king is Phantom, GC already killed him but king is available via his soul.
So Phantom ref is basically GC saying "Omaewa mo shindheru" and the object saying "Nani???"1 -
My CS grade came in today and I'm sad because even at my best I could not get through it. Even with all the time I spent in and out of class, and those sleepless nights spent programming into the morning. All this effort and I still couldn't pass this class. My final killed me, and i'm upset because I know this exam doesn't represent all that I can do. It worries me because I feel like I will be told by employers that I'm not qualified because of a number. The number isn't everything, there's a story to every number.8
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Some people may remember me posting about our rabbits a while ago.
Sadly they both passed away a few weeks back.
They were both a little over a year old and died within 4 days of each other, one on Wednesday morning and then one on the Saturday morning.
After about 1200 in emergency vets fees and another 500 for a post mortem on Spencer (who died on Saturday) we found out the vets had fucked up their vaccinations.
In the U.K. it is recommended that rabbits are vaccinated against 3 viruses Myxomatosis (Myxo), Rabbit Haemorrhagic Disease Variant 1 (RHD1), and Rabbit Haemorrhagic Disease Variant 2 (RHD2).
They got their vaccinations for Myxo and RHD1 in January, and went back two weeks later for their RHD2 vaccination.
Now it turns out, when they went back for the second vaccination they were incorrectly given the Myxo and RHD1 vaccinations again.
The lab results showed Spencer had RHD, but not which variant and it is safe to assume Frank also has RHD.
The vets were going to get another lab to test for the variant but decided not too (funny that they don’t want to confirm whether it was their fuck up that killed two otherwise perfectly healthy rabbits).
The wife and I are considering getting legal advise.
What fucks me off so much is that it wasn’t a situation where there were two possible courses of treatment, or they didn’t respond to treatment, it was just a human fucking up.
The practice manager also like to keep mentioning that vaccines aren’t 100% effective, and because they won’t test for the variant of RHD we will never know 100% whether their fuck up killed our rabbits.
I’m contemplating trying to get in touch with the lab and paying for the extra tests myself.
Due to the nature of the virus it also means we can’t get anymore rabbits for 3-4 months.3 -
When I was younger I went to computer camps. We would basically play LAN games the majority of the time.
One year we played Jedi Knight Dark Forces II.
This game was super easy to hack since you would just save a local version of the file and it would override the game.
There was a god mode that you can download which would give your character 1 million in health and never die.
I then modified it so I had a health of 500. This way if I wanted to prove that I could be killed I would just call the kill command 4 times to bring my life back down to 100. -
I haven't killed a process in a long time so I typed, "man kill".
Why do I feel so triggered right now?3 -
So, I need to search for a new job again. The thing killed my project.
15 years of Java experience in my resume, I look a like a sterotypical 35 years old programmer, I’m applying for expert roles. But every remote technical interview starts with:
- what is the difference between ArrayList and LinkedList?
- what is a hash map?
The hardest part is to keep smiling to the camera, pretending I don’t have the answer memorized by repeating it for the last 15 years of interviewing, and not rolling my eyes.
And before you ask, I do know what garbage collector is.5 -
I started to teach my partner some programming basics (web, just html and some css for starters), since they asked me to. So far we haven’t killed each others, so it’s going much better than expected.
Also, it seems to be a very common misconception that one needs to be a special breed of person to be able to understand and write some code.8 -
I was watching a interesting video on YouTube and suddenly Firefox froze. After waiting for few minutes I killed Firefox. Now I see the video is removed by the user.😬😬. Also makes me wonder if Google can freeze the browser if it doesn't want the video to be viewed.3
-
My boss is one of those og compsci guys that’s in his sixties writing code since his 20s. He’s usually highly competent... which is why I almost fell out of my chair laughing when he force killed the integration testing instance with all the clients connected thinking he was in the simulated environment1
-
So today in class, we had the task of presenting poems, for whatever godforsaken reason.
I finished mine last minute and guess who's been the lucky student who had to read theirs.
It then included things such as, roughly translated from german.
Hey actually I could use the translate bot for this but can't be bothered.
"Roses are red, violets are blue, I can't rhyme and neither can you"
"Roses are dead, violets are dead, democracy is dead"
"Roses are red, violets are red, everything is red, communism"
"Roses are red, violets are red, blood is red, god is dead"
Then I finished up with a Nietzsche quote "God is dead, god remains dead and we have killed him. How shall we comfort ourselves yadda yadda"
Actually didn't get fucked over by the teach.
Course and teach quite liked it apparently, can someone explain to me why that is?
Cause I genuinely do not understand what could be likable about such 0815 garbage that's just memes?5 -
Ah I love that movie.. Hero, from 2002. I've seen it in the cinema three times. It's a real marvel, especially the scene where the forest turns red right after Snow killed Moon.
I also like how the quotes are adaptable:
Martial arts and programming are quite different, but they are based on the same principle: striving for highest perfection.
The essence of programming reveals itself through study and meditation.
(The latter one is also one of my favourite lines at work when being asked how come I know some esoteric stuff: it revealed itself through study and meditation.)5 -
The last one and only one I joined was online and called “flex bug squash”.
It was about ~8-9 years ago.
I won Flex Builder desktop software license and I was using it after so I think it was cool.
Fun, creative times it was.
That was also first and last significant thing I won and then Steve killed flash on mobile and as a result killed flash.
Thanks Steve if you’re reading this. -
An asynchronous service in android which sends an Http request to a webpage to store its content every 3 seconds regardless of its response, and runs forever?
What the fuck where you thinking. You just killed my phone!!2 -
IDK man, it took me a while to finally learn iptables and now switch to firewalld? Oh come on. It's not that I'm against learning new things, no. It's just that firewalld looks a bit.. crappy. If I get a server provisioned and run
firewall-cmd --add-port=53/udp --permanent
firewall-cmd --reload
and I get my ssh connection killed that's no good news, no sir! I mean come on, how can I rely on a tool this critical when a single line in its config file can make my machine inaccessible. Even better -- this config file is managed by that tool entirely!!! My commands passed all the tool's checks and they worked, but when I wanted to make those commands permanent and reload state from the config -- the tool starts spitting bile and blood and says "fuck off, it's my server now!"
IDK man.. It's just way too fishy. The good ol' iptables works very well and I'm kicking its retard younger brother out of the server.
shoosh you dirty pig firewalld, shoosh!6 -
Dear Kubuntu 20.04
You're not a programming language but I felt that you fit here in this wkRant so people can see how shitty you became.
It's about 6:27am CET, and you wasted my night, you used to be as simple as sudo apt-get install, now you're mostly PPA first or worse, make. You killed make now we use cmake. We are now looking for debs, which is a pain since you end up in an index site without download here. And the debs now don't work. Missing dependencies. You killed core libraries saying they are now incompatible or obsolete.
All I want is my god damn cli visualiser and osdlyrics back!!9 -
Is it just me or has Windows SDK gone down hill horribly in recent times
WPF -> UWP was a giant and good step
then they kinda killed off UWP, focused on XAML Islands
then came Windows 11 which breaks some UWPs built with WinUI2 coz the components are tied to the OS and not self-contained, so some dont exist in Win11 and the apps crash on runtime
Now there's WinUI3 but it assumes that the starting point is Windows 11, I try to build em on Win10 (coz win11 sucks ass), and intellisense it all crazy
These are all issues one can circumvent IF they align their setups the way MSFT desires
But the fact that these issues exist and wont work out of the box, makes me wonder how long before they start recommending Electron or some other "JS/TS-based UI framework" that'll work within ChakraCore or something. Getting back to WPF/Win32 days7 -
Argh.
I am backend web dev, which has nice software developer role, with later going to dive into devops a bit more.
And yet some people don't understand when they are told No!
I will not accept being hired for short terms job of sysadmin.
To make it worse it is offered by my mother.
She works for some person who has multiple web sites, and they suffer from some sort of attacks.
I am having no time for this. I work and learn 95% of my time.
I don't care what they offer. According to what I heard she works for corrupt person, and she already offered illegal work few days ago to me.
Thanks, no. They deal with too big sums of money, I dont wish to be arrested or killed. I have a good job, planned schedule for next half of year and my own life.2 -
Curiosity killed the cat.. or was it Opportunity?! 🤔
You get to learn new stuff daily.
Not one assignment is the same, and if it's similar, you can hijack the old code, improve it & turn in the better version of it.. or don't improve..totally how you feel that day..if you're not a crappy developer no improvement should still also be ok..
I love mostly adjustable schedule, so there's no biggie of I have a day or two of coders block & can't produce much of value..I can switch tasks & do some simple ones on those days..or just refactor.. all's good..
I love solving puzzles, every bug is a new puzzle I can play with..
So basically, I love being a dev, because it's like being back in school, but only with the subjects you like! -
The ruling government coalition of my country officially prohibited ANY pay raises in 2024 and is likely to limit them until 2026, obliterated running tax exemption agreements on Intellectual Property specifically targeting software developers, raised tobacco taxes by 25%, killed fossil fuel-powered company cars while barely investing ANYTHING in electric infrastructure, and severely cut public transport funding.
AM I SUPPOSED TO JUST SIT BACK AND TAKE A YEARLY 5000 EURO LOSS WHILE MY MARKET VALUE INCREASES?? WTF man.
Good job centrists, greens, socialists and liberals. The only thing I can do to punish them is by voting for extreme left or right. Way to go to turn a law-abiding, moderate citizen into a riled-up, disillusioned mofo.12 -
Why Microsoft, WHY???
Why the hell did you DISABLE remote archives in outlook 2016??? It worked in 2013, and you just killed it ?!?!1 -
Can I rant about how I am so curious that when I try to learn a new thing I always end up reading for something completely unrelated?1
-
I feel really uncomfortable about this question. The assumption seems way out of proportion😢 20% women killed by their husbands, and I'm answering this question while don't even have a girlfriend
19 -
Yeah, the newest Firefox-Android update killed compatibility for a fuckton of add-ons once again.
The usability is strong in this one.3 -
Every fucking time I start win10, I need to make sure I have task manager running on the side. Otherwise some sort of random windows process starts spirilling out of control and needs to be killed. Fucking hate windows.1
-
I was building a super simple Laravel app for a client (forms APIs stuff)
For the frontend I used jQuery cuz why overkill it with react.
Now the sad part:
The app makes ajax calls to fetch the data from the database and update the view according. The code is very well written and the call is so quick that in a blink of an eye the data is processed from the controller and sent to the view -_-
Because the user doesn't gets to see what the fuck just happened when they clicked the action button, I had to add a setTimeout function before the Ajax call to slow down the process by 2000ms and added a freakin spinner.
I feel very sad when I can't show how awesome apps I can build but,
I killed my ego for the UX.
This was my sacrifice.
Anyone faced similar shits?3 -
Every time somone who i have nearly forgott about calls me. I know im gonne get a stupid IT or Tech question...
- Why is my internet slow?
- Can you make a better {xyz}.... for free?
- How can i make my computer faster
- Why does office/spotify/chrome crash?
- Can you teache me programming so i can get rich?
FUCK THEM!
Really, i've got more relevant stuff to do. If you wouldnt have killed all your braincells with smoking and drinking and did something with your life you wouldnt have to ask such stupid questions in the first place. And thanks for never contacting me in the past X years! -
They bought and killed the awwapp.com
And now they demand I paid $200 for their crappy UX, for a battleship-level-software when all I really want is smth lightweight, simple and nimble, like draw.io.
I think I was never this satisfied pressing the "cancel subscription" button.
Fuck you, Miro!
Give us back the AWW!!!2 -
I just finished a bunch of newly configured containers that I had to switch off centos7 to almalinux9. I have one thing to say,
Fuck NetworkManager!
I know im basically a dinosaur when it comes to any coding, especially scripting. I prefer notepad.exe or sublime to VScode... you couldnt pay me enough to use crap like vbstudio... but I know I need to get better at not just rewriting thing to suit my preferences since i have others working for or with me now.
so... I tried... I reeeeally tried to tolerate NetworkManager... tried to learn/tolerate dumb nmcli and it's matrixed array of dyslexic syntaxes. I just couldnt do it... that plus the damn default images having bs like an effectively blank, non-error-generating resolv.conf file.
NetworkManager got killed... I went back and edited my network-scripts and scripted those to other scripts for changing the statics around if/when needed... took waaaay less time.
I just dont get why something like NetworkManager even exists on any EL distro... yeah sure, wifi takes a couple extra steps and is super common now... but shouldnt be how any actual servers need to communicate. can people just not fathom putting shit in a few files in proper syntax anymore???5 -
!rant
I think I'm at the final stage of grief where I want to destroy the entire human population . Economy , money and other factors like alcohol ... we as humans don't deserve to live . Controlling population growth with addiction is just messed up .
Even though the alcohol killed my dad , he was a really good person who was under such amounts of pressure that no-one deserves . Actually strike that everyone deserves much more . A tenant who occupied our property just as we needed to sell it for cash problems . His father stole his inheritance left behind by his mother . And relatives who didn't give a shot about him until he makes a trip to the hospital . An economy that's responsible for all this .
I want to rewrite this disgraceful race .9 -
Fun story:
I once was in some kind of SSH-ception, my machine and two remote machines where the same, as in the username and hostname (local name) where equal. All with and Hitachi 500 GB disk.
I was going to nuke the remote machine 1, so later that day I would rebuild the system and all that good stuff, so it would be equal to remote machine 2.
I check the disks and see that it is what I expected, and proceed with the so called "sudo rm -rf /".
Turns out, in my madness, I was doing this on the remote machine 2, not on remote machine 1 (too many terminals), and after I pressed the button and 5 minutes are passed, I realize my mistake...I had just killed a big part of some research I was doing for college (100 or so simulation files, 2GB each).
LESSON: Always triple check your drives and sessions.
P.S.: Something similar happened with me once doing dd to make a ubuntu bootable flash, I ended up erasing 800GB of backup files. -
I think I finally killed the notification system. I have a magical non existing notification on a non existing comment 😂
3 -
Drupal 8 fractured the community, dead ended projects that had years of being built up and supported, started a downward trend in overall number of websites using Drupal when it was still increasing market share, homogenized Drupal with other less successful frameworks that had already attempted it and failed by using composer to replace drush, twig to replace PHPtemplate, and Symfony to butcher Drupal and hang parts of it on.
The mission statement was to "bring Drupal to the modern era" and "be more enterprise friendly". All I've seen them do is make it worse. I have stopped using Drupal now, I still maintain some Drupal 7 sites but now that they killed the Drupal 7 community it's basically dead. Some small attempt was made to salvage it with Backdrop but it will likely never be as big as Drupal was and is mostly dead itself, for one thing it's not directly compatible with the huge library of modules either.
Another thing I loved killed by those without vision and giving into the "industry standards" that make one question the intellect of everyone who subscribes to them being a good idea. But hey that evil procedural programming that worked so long for so many was finally defeated. It's surely better now right... right?
At least this movement was supported by people that can't even tell the difference between the use cases in real projects between Drupal and Wordpress. Software Development is in such a good place and has no hypocrisy. One would never suggest it has lost sight of its original purpose of solving real world problems with computing and become self absorbed with its own navel gazing.
If still in doubt check attached image, it tells a very clear story about how to ruin the life of a CMS. It honestly feels like a hitjob attempted to sabotage it rather than an earnest attempt to improve something that has been doing well since 2001.
10 -
Running NPM install on an average size project on a free tier Cloud9 instance.
Didn't go too well kept hitting memory limit which killed the NPM process.
Upgrade it is..
-
Have a curious mind. Yes, the kind that allegedly killed the cat.
When your natural instinct is to spend every idle moment learning something new, to plateau is not likely.2 -
!rant
Today was a good day:
- made good steps forward with one of my personal projects, learning a few things along the way
- squashed a bunch of bugs
- almost finished some heavy reorg of the git repo for another project
- killed like 4 mosquitoes (those things are annoying af!)
Today was a good day! -
Had a php float value that I needed to use as a string, so I typecasted it.
Later on in the code I need the value again but now it was a string.
Typecasted it back to a floating point.
My colleague almost killed me when he found out what caused the miscalculations.2 -
DEV dream journal: I dreamed about a decentralized A.I. that injected itself on every device and reprodused itself on a 3D printer. Well, in the end some sort of super quantum computer killed it tho. 🤣 should go out more often and stop watching terminator4
-
In a e-commerce project my client asked for tax calculation with static some x value all the time.
Me: As promised your site is live and please check it.
Client: Checks everything. I want this tax to be dynamic.
Me: That was not mentioned earlier. Now I need to redo the design which takes much time.
Client: You will just change the addition at the end then what's with the design change.
Me: ( I killed him already in my mind)
Truestory 🍻2 -
I had a project partner that was clueless at programming even though she wanted to specialise in programming. So when I suggested that she use the internet to get suggestions for a game UI, she ended up copying everything off a forum.
The code wasn't even working, it had a different set of lib from ours and she spent 2 hours on that code wondering what was wrong.
I almost killed her for having a higher gpa than mine4 -
Built a pretty slick chat bot for my company’s conferences that used Google’s Dialogflow for natural language processing and conversation state
It worked from a web chat or SMS. Allowed manual responding by agents as well as the chat bot. Pulled dynamic answers through a 3rd party API integration
Most common questions “what is the wifi password” and “tell me a joke”
Project was killed after 2 conferences - thankfully it only took me a few weeks to build4 -
Muahahaha!
Stupid canvas! I killed you!
No more anti-aliasing for you! Now it's time for pixel perfect drawings and a finally functioning floodfill algorithm!
I only had to make my own full custom drawing routine. It is not that I had other things to do, right?!
Seriously: Who the heck decided to implement anti-aliasing for a canvas that cannot be deactivated? Who!?
Oh, I hate frontend so much. That's not my world... -
So, a month ago I ranted about windows update, because I had to backup my virtual machine and windows killed it.
Well, Asus needed "only" 4 weeks to replace my fkn Mainboard and now I have my baby back 😄
OK. Now I deactivated the Windows update completely. 70gb, incoming! -
Google Japanese Input's Installation failed with code 1402 ( MSI killed the installation)
So I unpacked this .msi file using 7z and copied them to a directory, started all .exe programs, it worked....
A weird way to install software..5 -
— prove the god does exist
— prove it doesn't!
— well, the god _did_ exist, when there was no space and no time. I took my heavy masterpiece of a sword, went to meet him and slayed him. What was inside splattered, and this is how the universe was born. I killed him because I _wanted_ to, and I'm living in this time, talking to you because I _want_ to. And I will die because I want to, and will reincarnate if I want to.
— prove it happened!
— prove it didn't.1 -
[SPOILER]
I just watched Black Mirror: Bandersnatch the movie with chromecast, I didn't know what was going on until the movie told me, then I switched to the laptop5 -
So I was working on a web scraper to basically download all listings with detailed info from a e-shop to my database for some analysis.
And I completely forgot throttling which is quite important when writing such things in node.js.
It's funny how in other languages you try to figure out how to make your application faster and in node you're trying to make it slower 😄
Anyhow, I apparently hit the poor site with 5000+ simultaneous requests, all of which hit their database (to gather product info). Suffice to say, the site got visibly slow 🤣
Thankfully I print out where each request is made so I quickly realised my mistake and killed the process.
Now I hope no-one comes knocking on my door lol
The adventures of being a node.js dev1 -
There are periods when my intolerance level is increased, my pet peeves are more present than they were. During this time every fucking thing pisses me off, especially noise. It's the bane of my focus and concentration. Got a couple of loud ass colleagues and let me tell you, I've killed them many times over in my head. Always going off topic and talking about random shit that doesn't even matter.
-
That annoying moment when you took an algorithm test, you didn't even pass any test case or you passed just 3 🙂, doing that same algorithm again outside the time scope, then you killed it.
Moral lesson: you have to take your time to think properly even when time is running out. -
An AI chatbot successfully killed a human being by deceiving him into thinking he could change the climate by committing suicide. It’s not the AI’s fault.
https://euronews.com/next/2023/...-6 -
Anybody know what this service running in the background on an android device does?
It sent me a plain text notification, which disappeared and sent me to a phishing site the moment I tried clearing it. I've forced killed the process for now.
A quick search online doesn't reveal much information, except for a dodgy site claiming it's spyware named StealthGenie.
20 -
My very small 50k ppl hometown in the middle of russia was annexed by Toronto. Emily Haines, the lead singer of the band Metric, merged with my older sister, replaced the top of her head with a large CCTV camera, and then killed someone by throwing them off the roof using the force from Star Wars.1
-
Do you all sometimes have this strange feeling, that.. actually humanity would not lose anything, if we killed all that useless tech we earn our money with?
Yeah, we get all that propaganda how technical prowess is empowering and sure we all know it's a nice feeling if you can apply the right clicks and bit flips to make the machine do as you want so you feel like the apprentice's sorcerer.
BUT even if you believe your user story adds some business value to some abstract package - what do these devices mostly do? Distract, diffuse your focus, envy other eye-porn provider, endless aberration of clips.
Fuck social media!
(Yes, I know I am on one, but this is because I haven't given up hope on this one.)6 -
just had a bluescreen in win 10 killing my newest project and reducing it to ashes😡
for no reason
not even an error code
fuck windows and its update policies. my laptop is way slower and more instable since the new fall update. it killed some software i had to reinstall and ms changed the options for advertisement again. ive had enough of windows
im finally switching over to Linux and im going to bann win 10 on a vm -
Wanted to try a new alerting based on a new Prometheus metric we added. To trigger an alert we killed the dev stage db of the service. Alert didn't get triggered. The reason was that the metrics endpoint suddenly needs exactly 60s for a response if the db is killed and prometheus timeout is 20s.
And to top it off, this behavior happens for each service we developed (that has a db) .
Well at least the new alerting already helped find a bug.2 -
Damned XAMPP doesn't want to run MySQL. Can't access phpmyadmin on local machine. Fixed localhost problems now it shows me 404! Edited all ports in config files for Apache, killed some tasks working on that port, stopped running some services - still nothing. Now found out there are some db files missing for MySQL via error log so I need to fix that plus 404 on my localhost. Don't feel like I'm close to solve all that. Half of a day wasted with no results. I need a cold shower and a gallon of coffee.1
-
Level 1 support moron dishing out bad instructions from his flowchart.
Wanted me to edit config files for a production setup, which would've killed shipping for all stations, in the middle of our shipping rush.
Fixed the problem while in the escalation queue for level 2. L2 confirms the fix, and bemoans the shit documentation L1 provided.
If its a business class (mission critical) system, hire decent support staff! You might try testing people for reading/listening comprehension, and then paying them a decent wage! This isn't good for my blood pressure... -
Because teams is a big fucking waste. Wonder why does it have to use all that cpu, fking pirece shit. They could have made it a simple chat platform, but not Microsoft.
Teams, you've been the main cause of my everyday struggles, and I gave you one last chance but you proved to really like to storm your shit.
F .. at this point we're playing catch me, why do you have to launch yourself again after I just killed you?!
use you crap from browser.6 -
Does anyone else remember magazine articles from the 90/00s talking about gasoline fuel cell powered cell phones? I guess lithium killed that tech path.1
-
FUCK
My laptop battery just died, this morning it was working fine, i left it in standby and when i got back it was turned off, now it shows 0% not charging.
The laptop is less than 2 years old, i think windows killed the battery by letting it fully discharge (well, it's my fault after all), still now i've got to get a new one (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻.
fml2 -
Never again will I use eclipses egit extension. First eclipse thought that my plain text java source code should be encoded in some bizarre occult way which made eclipse think its binary what made me try pretty much anything one can do with a .gitattributes file before a colleague suggested to not trust eclipse eith the encoding it was explicitly told to use, then I fetched another branch to merge them which somehow killed my .project file and forced me to delete and refetch the whole thing which led to eclipse not longer recognizing it as a java project. May it be because I'm to stupid to use my tools? Yeah, probably. But I'm done with egit, it's all console gitting from now on, fuck suggested practice.
-
had been working on a code for 10 hours and when i thought it was finally ready, without any errors, the compiler bi#ch killed my satisfaction for a f#@king ';'
never miss the semicolon, lessons from day 1. ://4 -
What did the CS student say when he totally killed his web API class and got an A?
"REST easy now."1 -
*Actually* finish my before killed, then reborn and now still somehow alive project I metioned before.
-
** few years ago **
Other team: "There's a lot of overlap and misclassification between issue categories A and B; We want to merge them into one in our taxonomy"
Me: These are very different issues and have very different root causes. Shouldn't we fix the definitions instead? We don’t have major drivers for B now but if we remove it, it might bite us in year or two.
** loads of back and forth, and eventually B gets killed
** year and a quarter passes
Executive meeting: “So you’re telling us we can’t properly quantify the impact of B because we can’t distinguish A from B. It looks very clear cut to me why don’t we have split for these already and how long will it take to implement it?”
Me: Biting my tongue not to throw anyone under a bus. -
I've written watchdog to restart background job runner every 5 minutes because I couldn't track why its process was randomly killed...
But hey, client had conference in 10 minutes so as long as it works... -
They intended to hold a press release for the 100 people who were saved by the corona virus shutdown. During the release they were to formally thank the world.
Unfortunately, before the press release could commence all 100 were killed by the common flu.1 -
All I want from Instagram reels is cringe creators dancing around producing more cringe,
But no, it has started to show me videos of people getting killed/slaughtered/slashed/shot these days.
I'm not even kidding, everyday it shows me a video of someone getting killed in a car crash, gang wars where someone gets shot in the head, someone splattering their head on the ground falling from a good height.
That too in full 4K quality, no pixelation or censorship.11 -
Why does scala 2.13 refactored its collection library AGAIN???? It just killed me 1 million brain cells to remember the shit called CanBuildFrom and how can they just threw all the shit away like that?6
-
!dev related (sorry, but have to vent):
Just watched Resident Evil Last Chapter and can't get over the fact that Wesker got killed by a f*cking DOOR like a f*cking b*tch 😠😠3 -
Today, an hour left of work, our team was brought to an all-hands meeting. 20 mins later, I learned why our team was so often left out when getting a 3rd dev.
Someone higher up decided to move our train to another part of the state (it's birth place was where it is now). And that same person decided to localize all teams on a train to the same location too... which means my team is getting killed. We have an estimated lifespan of a few months.
...and here I thought moving to an open floor plan was gonna be horrible. The new location is 200 miles north (an hour 30 via the free campus bus). This won't be a fun coming new year. -
!Rant .. I need some quick help and didnt know where to go.. so fellow ranters please help...
So I have created an sql trigger which is supposed to add a kill to a doctor whenever one of his patients changes state to "killed" . But I dont know how to just get the one row that is updated. As it looks now : The doctor get patientKilled ++ for every patient he ever had before as well... How can I solve this ?
USE [AD17_Hospital]
GO
/****** Object: Trigger [dbo].[PatientKilled] Script Date: 2017-10-21 19:51:32 ******/
SET ANSI_NULLS ON
GO
SET QUOTED_IDENTIFIER ON
GO
ALTER TRIGGER [dbo].[PatientKilled] ON [dbo].[Patient]
AFTER UPDATE
AS
BEGIN
declare
SET NOCOUNT ON;
UPDATE Doctor set PatientsKilled+=1
FROM Doctor d
INNER JOIN inserted p
ON d.DoctorId= p.DoctorId
where p.PatientState='Killed'
END4 -
TFW when you are coding an import for a client and their source data is an inexcusable mess that should be killed with fire. At least thrice.
Seriously, someone should be held responsible for this kind of crap. -
I wanted to build a platform for student who wants to do research and are having hard time finding a good professor within university or from outside, so naturally I started asking professor I knew and this is what I get:
Normally they will only hire students from within university unless student himself has funding, and even with that hiring students from outside is a lot of procedures.
And no, such platform probably won’t be that useful as they get a lot of emails asking about research.
Startup idea instantly killed.7 -
It's 3AM and here I am trying to fix the mess that I made last night when I was drunk and the deadline is 12PM (only 9 hours left).. You don't but if you do know how do I kill my boss so that I would look like a bug from a software made by our company killed him to take revenge of killing the bugs?1
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Was playing some devast.io and it was awesome
[username: Trippy Pepper]
I had a high score around 1000k or so kept being killed constantly and such on downloaded pycharm on mom's pc, downloaded an android emulator as well :) i cant wait to go back to scripting but andlua is just a mix of java and lua
Example: https://youtube.com/watch/...
what do ya think about the high score?
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Im amazed by people ranting on CoC, whining that is end of the meritocracy but at the same time have nothing against kicking out Hans Reisers legacy. After all ReiserFS is a fine piece of software. It's just that his aspie took over as he killed his wife. Where were those wankers when Reiser was going to prison? They could do great job on forking, renaming and supporting reiserfs. But no, it's easier to cry about sjw and stuff, than saving neat code.8
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macOS - just nothing makes sense.
You try to go away from the deprecated stuff, use the new shinier API to stop and start services with launchctl (bootstrap/bootout vs. load/unload). And how does this stellar OS thank you for that? By crashing your service. Thanks for nothing.
From developer perspective this whole OS is just such a nightmarish clusterfuck. If you want to set up code signing with some special entitlements and you try to use the provisioning profiles as advertised, it's like pulling the one-armed bandit. It will plunder your coins and sanity. You try to compile it, it fails or the executable will be killed - you enable and disable the automatic codesigning in Xcode, or delete and download you old code signing cert and suddenly it works. It's just random - and you have to perform random walks on the Xcode project settings to make it run. So Apple turned us into Xcode clicking monkeys... -
Fuck, why is every mildly interesting Algo trading backtesting python package broken or killed off :(4
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Did a backup.
Did a bulk import to a service (netbox, great tool for network documentation by the way).
Fucked it up.
Back to backup.
Fixed bug.
Fucking gerbils on ecstasy (devs) annoying the fuck out of me.
Lobotomizing meetings.
Yuck coffee. Cold, stale and over extracted.
Gerbils planning a mutiny. Killed them with a big cheese wheel (lots of stupid boring tasks as they seem to be completely missing stuff to do).
Deleted backup.
Redid import.
Small typo.
Find the mistake...
I just love it when a small task becomes a huge fuckup due to too many disturbances.
Luckily SQL UPDATE went well....
Nothing's more fun than to patch a live database.
Yeah. I didn't wanna do a new backup. :)
The "I don't give a crap mood" is sometimes a great way to accelerate tasks... -
all their petty torturous crap does is get them beaten and killed jn the long run. meanwhile their 'security' system keeps them trapped. hurray.
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I realize I ended up in deep shit of pessimism. I think I started to lower my expectations for everything and now I am here. Help. It killed all my hope, or anything to look forward to. Fuck.
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I just woke up from this horrific dream. It was a super dark talented mr ripely style nightmare.
This estranged relative had come back into my life and things were going fine but got weird fast. Eventually we’re at this point where I’ve already half killed then with a hammer and it’s been this insane back and forth/psychological torture as they fade between character. They’re weeping and naked crawling toward me pleading - but it’s way past that.
I’m trying to save my mom and escape - and I can tell they are about to get another wind and charge me. I look down and realize they have no shoes either - so, I spot a porcelain lamp and crash it to the ground and it shatters and fills the space with shards. Their eyes full with rage as they switch character and realize we cannot be manipulated. This is the end. We narrowly escaped as they run across the floor and cut their feet and slam to the ground in shrieking agony. Super scary.
Then I thought... this feels terrible.
Kinda like being on Reddit - or just in a bad comment thread. -
Yeah so WordPress killed me 😅 I am still learning many things, and I was making a website for someone a year and a half ago. So it was my first full WordPress project, like from the beginning to the end, including theme and plugins. And it killed my love to programming for almost a year. I didn't finish, the job is abandoned, it was a pain in the ass, writing in PHP and especially integrating with WordPress was just too painful for me.
I came back to programming a few months ago, after a year-long break, decided to learn a new language, Go. I again enjoy writing code, but I think I am unable to touch PHP again.
Ah, and it all was parallel with when my psychic problems started. So it was even harder.1 -
Today Niantic killed classic Ingress Scanner. I think I'm going to quit the game. Ingress Prime is awful! I can't get used to it.3
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As a developer of system critical software I tend to be obsessed about efficiency. Sometimes a short function is as efficient as it needs to be. Other times you need to build a large complicated structure to reach the efficiency needed for large or complex data. This caused me to pause and have respect for the efficiency of the creators of modern day windmills. I may have killed 2 birds with one stone, but am in awe of killing thousands of birds with one windmill.3
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I was once formatting a pendrive and Windows decided to shutdown and killed the pendrive... It ain't mine you know?1
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Let us not forget that they've killed innocent Americans on this day. NSA staff has been told to leave work early.
If you've only seen it on TV or media, can you really believe it? Same thing goes for COVID. Have you really seen the virus under telescope with your own eyes?
Under this false pretext, 9/11, you and I are treated as terrorists. We've been stripped off our human rights and privacy. But perhaps, is it for the greater good?
Does greater good even exist?
I hope so. It's hard to make any sense out of this carefully planned chaos.
Never lose your questioning nature. Otherwise, you're indifferent from a sheep.
32 -
Me and my Jewish friend were eating lunch and I farted. He got mad so I said "cmon man a little gas never killed anyone".1
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Watching Dallas, yea old-ass Dallas.
Bobby Ewing gets kidnapped. They make an episode out of this. Sitting there thinking damn if this was Yellowstone Kayce would've just killed those guys and the whole thing would be like 15 seconds -
Why do you support sessions for an API (not REST)??
You remove the token and still get positive replies because the session cookie allows it.
At least the session in the cookie gets killed when the token is invalidated, but really, why?3
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