Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
Search - "working dev"
-
Hired a new backend Dev. He writes a script and sends it for testing...
Tester: "It's not working..."
Backend Dev: Goes to Mongo and deletes the tester's whole profile...
I cant control my laughter every time I remember this incident...He claimed it was a mistake, I don't think that it was a mistake...the tester had it coming...
"It's not working" that's all he says every time...I mean at least give me something to start with...!4 -
QA: There is a bug in your program, it doesn't work !
DEV: What? It is working on my machine, let me show you *opens app*
QA: Well, then I will tell our clients to use your machine every time they want the app
DEV: ...7 -
Dad is also a dev/architect. Mom barely knows how facebook works. So essentially she thinks I'm either playing games or working hard. Dad knows I'm just playing games.4
-
Frontend & backend dev conversation
Backend Dev: what will you be working on?
Frontend dev: i will be creating a nice animated loader. You?
Backend Dev: i will be working on optimizing the backend so that no one can see your loader.
🤣🤣🤣🤣7 -
Dev: "Ah, I finally fixed that code I was working on the other day and got it pushed to staging!"
Almond: "Ah, great! What was the issue in the end?"
Dev: "It was an odd one - it wasn't actually my code that was the issue, there was a bunch of other code getting in the way."
Almond: "How do you mean?"
Dev: "It kept complaining about something called a "unit test" failing - so after a while I found the right unit tests, deleted them, and now it works great!"
Almond: "..."11 -
the advantage of dating a non-dev: she thinks I'm incredibly smart when I describe what I'm working on, when in reality I have no clue what I'm doing 🙃12
-
Our dear freelance web dev, you absolutely need to come to our office on the other side of the city during working hours when it's impossible to find parking space for an urgent meeting to discuss you copy/pasting to a web page a simple block of text we'll send you via email
-
Dev: Ok issue fixed, you just need to log out and back in again on your end to receive the fix
User: It’s still not working
Dev: Did you log out and in again?
User: No why would I want to do that?
Dev: It’ll reset your locally saved login information which is causing the issue
User: I thought you said the issue was fixed?
Dev: On our end yes, we just need you to reset your end in order to receive the fixed version
User: Look I have been dealing with this issue for 6 months. Fixing bugs are your responsibility. I have too much to do, you have to get this fixed. *click*.
Dev: Yeah you submitted the bug ticket yesterday night though
Email from users manager later that day: <User> is saying you are refusing to fix this bug. This is unacceptable. Fix it or else I will escalate this. Also there are other bugs we noticed today too, fixing them is absolutely critical!
Dev: …
Dev: What other bugs did you notice?
*no response for 2 weeks and then:
User: Hey you can close this ticket, the issue seems to have resolved itself.
Dev: ….muppet.17 -
Looking at the database credentials for an application I’m working on.
Dev/QA password: yU$@1zmH91?
Prod password: app12312 -
Manager: *taps dev on shoulder* We need to do B
Dev: I know, you created a ticket for it yesterday
Manager: Yeah but it hasn’t been done yet. It needs to get done.
Dev: I’m currently working on A which is higher priority
Manager: Ok but B needs to be done too
Dev: I know, it’s next on my board
Manager: I’m just making sure you are aware of it
Dev: I am aware of it, it’s next on the board
Manager: Ok but make sure you do it after A
Dev: Yup it’s next up
Manager: Ok, don’t let anyone distract you
Dev: …9 -
Applied for my first dev position last year. Interviewer asked for a code sample so I showed him some forum software I was working on at the time. I think my commit messages tanked the interview...5
-
Life story of every Dev in nutshell :
Everything is working perfectly as expected and no body congratulates Dev and no one gives a shit.
Single thing is broken and the whole universe be like : "Where the fuck is that son of a b*tch? Bring that bastard in front of me right now."
😡😡😡😡6 -
Corporate IT: YOU MUST COME INTO THE OFFICE. WE JUST RECEIVED AN URGENT NOTIFICATION FROM APPLE OF A SECURITY VULNERABILITY IN iOS DEVICES. YOU HAVE BEEN IDENTIFIED AS HAVING A MAC ASSET. COME INTO THE OFFICE IMMEDIATELY AND UPDATE IT.
Dev: I don’t use that mac, it sits in my office desk drawer unplugged. I’ll update it if I ever need it for anything. Which I won’t, we don’t do iOS dev anymore.
Corporate IT: NOOOOO!!! YOU MUST UPDATE IT NOW!!!
Dev: I’m not wasting time driving into the office this week. We have an important deadline we’re working on, I can’t afford to lose 2 hours to this. Plus it can’t be turned on right now, It’s been unplugged for 2 years.
Corporate IT: THAT WOULDN’T STOP A HACKER!!
Dev: …11 -
QA just asked me, why does the website look so ugly and no CSS is working on Internet Explorer
I'm lucky I'm not the web dev lol
*I laughed*
*IE laughed*
*Windows laughed*9 -
Dev submitting PR: “Testing instructions: Self explanatory”
Dev reviewing PR: You need to be a bit more verbose than that.
Dev submitting PR: “Testing instruction: Feature should work as expected”
Dev reviewing PR: *sigh*… Feature doesn’t work as expected
Dev submitting PR: WHAT IS NOT WORKING AS EXPECTED??? I NEED MORE DETAIL THAN THAT!!
Dev reviewing PR: …….So do I you muppet5 -
Dev: So we’ve been working on X for about 2 weeks now, it’s about halfway do—
Manager: Btw what is the status of X?
Dev: I was just telling you
Manager: Oh, I wasn’t listening.
Dev: …
Dev: So as I was saying, we’re ab—
Manager: Oh and where are we at with Y?
Dev: …10 -
Real conversation:
dev 1: so what are you working on these days?
dev 2: some wordpress project.
dev1: hahaha. wordpress is shit. are you a real developer?
dev 2: have you ever used wordpress?
dev1: no.
dev2: okay.26 -
Skipping all the "Women in IT" sessions my company tries to enforce, along with ditching such questions like "What attrocities did I experience related to my gender, during my first month of working here?"
Well, fuck, we are few, all right. But can I just be a dev instead of a girl dev, please?
I discussed this whole feminism trend with many of the women colleagues, but not one of them could mention a case where they were distinguished by their gender. Ever.5 -
Me: *Installs travis*
Dev: oh what's travis?
Me: it's a continuous integration tool I wanna setup.
Dev: ... contin.... ?
Me: continuous integration, a tool that performs builds.
Dev: ah!, is it the new version of that deprecated tool we were using "client access"?
Me: ... no ... that's an authentication service that generates and stores oauth tokens. This is the continuous integration tool I told you about yesterday (and last week and the week before).
Dev: ... contin....
Me: ... con ........ continuous integration. It listens to branches on GitHub, downloads, builds, tests and then deploys the code.
Dev: ah ok ok, cool.
I would bet my monthly fucking salary he can not repeat what I said, tell me what oauth is, or explain what he's working on at the minute.
Jesus at this rate I'd bet my salary he can't tell me my name.7 -
*Client phones me at 11pm*
Client: It's not working!!
Me:What's the error you're getting?
Client: "Database connection error"
*Phones system/dB admin*
DB Admin: Yeah we had to change the SQL logins, I've sent you the new ones
*Phones junior dev in charge of dB programming*
Junior Dev: Yeah you'll just have to go and change the credentials. They're in all the places where we're using the dB, just before the statement, in the connection strings...
We make over 470 calls to the DB 😑16 -
*In teams meeting with client*
Manager: Yes we can do all of that and it will be actioned very quickly. We will make all of these feature requests top priority. We will set aside everything we are currently working on in order to get this done!
Dev: ...Are you writing any of this down?
Manager: I don't need to, I always remember everything!
Dev: Just so you are aware, I'm not writing anything down. You're going to need to create a ticket with requirements spelled out for each one of these promises you're making otherwise they won't get actioned by the team.
Manager: I know that!
Dev: ...
*Later that day*
Ticket Title: Action client feature requests TOP PRIORITY!!!
Ticket Description: *empty*
Dev: ...13 -
Dev deleted a branch I was working on. When I asked him why, he responded "I don't know. I didn't create the branch so I thought I could delete it"
Frack!9 -
Non-dev boss: "so, what are you working on today?"
Me: "I'm working on the API"
Non-dev boss: "that's what you said last week! Why aren't you progressing?"
💢5 -
Pro(s) at working in my company:
- Lots of girls (we're literally 10% male)
Con(s) at working in my company:
- 99.9376% of them are taken :/
But hey, at least I can get my confidence boosted by talking to beautiful people and make new female friends :D
Partly a dev-dream come true?30 -
FYI, you get paid an average of 100k/year working for a business as a dev in switzerland. In india, you'll be looking at an average salary of 5-7k.
Which is less than what you earn in a month in switzerland.
We are so spoiled.16 -
the ultimate dick move: invite your dev to a meeting, scheduled a few weeks ahead, with title "performance issues", without any further comments or notice in advance. when dev, seeing this invitation and feeling kicked right in the face, asks if this meeting is about a certain project or their individual working performance, just answer "both" without any further comments. if they have any more questions about it, just tell them you have no time to answer because meetings.21
-
So I’m working on an app with a friend who is designing it and I spent a week building a custom segment control as a menu bar. He said that it looked nice but he got inspiration to make a tab bar instead 😑
Cheers to the dev life2 -
My setup at work as a juniour dev. Got a month ago a 3rd monitor (the left), because I'm working on some backend services and had to test them with a touchscreen. Now only the frontend dev and I have 3 monitors in the whole company 😁6
-
The server for an internal application was acting up, but everything was working fine locally. After an 18 hour day, I just rerouted the traffic to my dev machine and left it on overnight so I could go home.
A piece of me hates myself and also loves myself for that one.2 -
This just in everyone...
Android Dev: *sent and email to network admin* can you please unblock github for a few mins.
Network admin: *Replied* Can you take a screenshot whats the error your getting.
Android Dev: *Replied with screenshot* "Failed to load resource: the server responded with a status of 503 (Service Unavailable)"
Network admin: that is a known issue. *Replied with Wordpress Links.
Android Dev: why is github working outside our network then?
Network admin: there must be a problem with your code that needs to be tweaked.
Team: *FACE PALM*5 -
Project Manager: Hey Gid, we need to start migrating project-A to the new Server.
Me: Okay, I will inform Dev-Q.
Project Manager: Please do and treat as top priority!
Me: Hey Dev-Q, we need to migrate project-A to the new Server and we need to get it done asap.
Dev-Q: But I'm currently working on some critical bug XYZ which PM wants fixed before COB.
Me: I dunno maybe you want to speak with him.
Dev-Q: I was told to...
Project Manager: Yes! we need that done right away.
Dev-Q: What about the critical...
Project Manager: No! treat this as top priority the client just called.
Dev-Q: Okay.
Me: Any update yet?
Dev-Q: Yep but it seems like the database is quite large and the migration may take a while.
Me: Okay take your time.
Dev-Q: {hours later} Pheww done! All files and database migrated successfully.
Project Manager: Good good. So the critical bug XYZ was also completed and migrated to the new server right?
Dev-Q:5 -
Dev related: To actually finish my projects instead of working on different ones, and end up finishing nothing.
I said I was going to create my own operating system. I started it, but barely. I haven't touched the compiler I was working on for months. Oh, and I'm working on an android app related to writing. I started it a while back, and never got to finish it.
My need to stop starting new projects, because if I keep doing this, I'll never finish anything.
Non dev related: To get my manuscript out of the slush pile, and finally published. It's currently in the dreadful querying process.4 -
Manager: How’s the progress coming along?
Dev: The section of code I’m working with is one of the more difficult ones so it’s a little slow
Manager: Ok well I didn’t write that section of the code
Dev: I’m not saying you did I’m just giving you the status update that you asked for
Manager: Ok well I can’t really do anything about that so how about you tell me something I can do something about instead of just complaining about code THAT I DIDN’T EVEN WRITE!! *Marks self as offline*
Dev: …10 -
You know scrum is working when the dev team are feeling that scrum isn't working because they have nothing to do because the product team can't keep up with the pace.4
-
New dev couldn't get his laptop set up and screens working. After a day struggling I walked over and recommend he plug in the power cord......3
-
Be me, new dev on a team. Taking a look through source code to get up to speed.
Dev: **thinking to self** why is there no package lock.. let me bring this up to boss man
Dev: hey boss man, you’ve got no package lock, did we forget to commit it?
Manager: no I don’t like package locks.
Dev: ...why?
Manager: they fuck up computer. The project never ran with a package lock.
Dev: ..how will you make sure that every dev has the same packages while developing?
Manager: don’t worry, I’ve done this before, we haven’t had any issues.
**couple weeks goes by**
Dev: pushes code
Manager: hey your feature is not working on my machine
Dev: it’s working on mine, and the dev servers. Let’s take a look and see
**finds out he deletes his package lock every time he does npm install, so therefore he literally has the latest of like a 50 packages with no testing**
Dev: well you see you have some packages here that updates, and have broken some of the features.
Manager: >=|, fix it.
Dev: commit a working package lock so we’re all on the same.
Manager: just set the package version to whatever works.
Dev: okay
**more weeks go by**
Manager: why are we having so many issues between devs, why are things working on some computers and not others??? We can’t be having this it’s wasting time.
Dev: **takes a look at everyone’s packages** we all have different packages.
Manager: that’s it, no one can use Mac computers. You must use these windows computers, and you must install npm v6.0 and node v15.11. Everyone must have the same system and software install to guarantee we’re all on the same page
Dev: so can we also commit package lock so we’re all having the same packages as well?
Manager: No, package locks don’t work.
**few days go by**
Manager: GUYS WHY IS THE CODE DEPLOYING TO PRODUCTION NOT WORKING. IT WAS WORKING IN DEV
DEV: **looks at packages**, when the project was built on dev on 9/1 package x was on version 1.1, when it was approved and moved to prod on 9/3 package x was now on version 1.2 which was a change that broke our code.
Manager: CHANGE THE DEPLOYMENT SCRIPTS THEN. MAKE PROD RSYNC NODE_MODULES WITH DEV
Dev: okay
Manager: just trust me, I’ve been doing this for years
Who the fuck put this man in charge.11 -
Manager: That last dev you hired is working out well. Where did you get him from?
Dev: *Looking at new hire’s resume which only contains a single bootcamp and nothing else*
Dev: He’s a rescue.11 -
It sucks, been working in restaurants for 18 years, switched to code, for the best (all details go between these ...) but now it's worst, no job, nothing, a 39 years old junior web dev doesn't exist, getting ready to live outside, happy I found that app tho. You guys are so much fun :)6
-
Unaware that this had been occurring for while, DBA manager walks into our cube area:
DBAMgr-Scott: "DBA-Kelly told me you still having problems connecting to the new staging servers?"
Dev-Carl: "Yea, still getting access denied. Same problem we've been having for a couple of weeks"
DBAMgr-Scott: "Damn it, I hate you. I got to have Kelly working with data warehouse project. I guess I've got to start working on fixing this problem."
Dev-Carl: "Ha ha..sorry. I've checked everything. Its definitely something on the sql server side."
DBAMgr-Scott: "I guess my day is shot. I've got to talk to the network admin, when I get back, lets put our heads together and figure this out."
<Scott leaves>
Me: "A permissions issue on staging? All my stuff is working fine and been working fine for a long while."
Dev-Carl: "Yea, there is nothing different about any of the other environments."
Me: "That doesn't sound right. What's the error?"
Dev-Carl: "Permissions"
Me: "No, the actual exception, never mind, I'll look it up in Splunk."
<in about 30 seconds, I find the actual exception, Win32Exception: Access is denied in OpenSqlFileStream, a little google-fu and .. >
Me: "Is the service using Windows authentication or SQL authentication?"
Dev-Carl: "SQL authentication."
Me: "Switch it to windows authentication"
<Dev-Carl changes authentication...service works like a charm>
Dev-Carl: "OMG, it worked! We've been working on this problem for almost two weeks and it only took you 30 seconds."
Me: "Now that it works, and the service had been working, what changed?"
Dev-Carl: "Oh..look at that, Dev-Jake changed the connection string two weeks ago. Weird. Thanks for your help."
<My brain is screaming "YOU NEVER THOUGHT TO LOOK FOR WHAT CHANGED!!!"
Me: "I'm happy I could help."4 -
Me: So why did you drop the db?
Intern: I couldn't rename the Model I've just created.
Me: Your CV says you're a prolific Rails Dev.
Me: How many days you have left working here?
Intern: 3Months
Me: Just take 3 months off work.13 -
Manager: *taps dev on shoulder* Hey I noticed a minor bug I think
Dev: Sigh…. So then create a ticket for it
Manager: Can’t you just fix it right now?
Dev: I can but I’m currently working on that other issue you told everyone was “top priority” at the morning status meeting. Should I switch to actioning this minor bug instead?
Manager: Don’t switch just multitask and work faster!
Dev: …8 -
Got this status from another dev:
"Other than the fact that nothing's working, everything's going great!"3 -
there's this thing I've noticed...
º the more interesting DEV task I'm working on, the more I forget to eat (sometimes at all @9-5)
º the more boring/repelling DEV task I'm working on, the more snack breaks I take
Am I alone here?
Does that mean exciting DEV (only?) work is more likely to keep you fit and boring tasks are dragging you to obesity?2 -
Left dev tools open while working then opened a new tab and went to Amazon. Noticed this in the HTML source.
Say hello to the Amazon Catduck.9 -
Dev: My VM is not working. Something is wrong with VM.
Me: Have you made any changes to the code?
Dev: It shouldn't matter my VM is not working.
[I go and check the Dev's VM.]
Me: ಠ_ಠ The build output literally states your unit tests failed -
User: The app is crashing! Fix this immediately. We can’t do our jobs without it!!
Dev: Patch applied, can you confirm it is now working on your end?
User: EXCUSE ME?! THAT IS NOT OUR RESPONSIBILITY! WE ARE WAY TOO BUSY, ASK SOME OTHER DEPARTMENT TO DO THAT OR DO IT YOURSELF!
Dev: …7 -
Not meeting any good mentors. Not meeting any good colleagues. Not attending any good dev classes.
I have self taught everything. After my uni kicked out, I founded my own work and working since then. Couldn't hire any great talent that can guide me with the pay I can afford.2 -
Front end dev be like:
Me:
This is greatest design concept ever!
Why isn't it working? It was working yesterday.
This is the stupidest design concept ever.
It works! It works! The client is going to love this as much as I do. It's exactly what they asked for!
Client:
Actually, can you do something completely different?5 -
My PM once inserted test data directly into the dev database [ We do have an admin panel ].
Took screenshots of what was not working properly with the imagined data.
Posted them on the WhatsApp group.
Greets me in the fucking morning with "I WROTE TEST CASES YESTERDAY".
FTW -
Long rant...
*Designer Posted image of newly designed layout for our app on trello.
Dev 1 (me, being the junior, on ios) : so... What's the size for x, Y, z, a, B, C?
She: it's 9 for the small text, 10 for sub title, 12 for main title.
*shows her the design on app
Dev 1: seems too small
She: just make it to look not small.
Dafug?
*finishes the app layout for that screen.
*working on next screen
Dev 1: your new design is for the screen of 1920x1080. But our supported screen size starts from 320 width. So there'll be text overlapping each other and ui might screw up.
She: uh.. Just... Put those that will overlap to the next line.
*shrugs
Dev 1: ok
=======
2 days later
Dev 2 (senior, working on Android)
Dev 2: so... What's the colour for x, Y, z
*Dev 1 laughs on the inside because of the struggles we have with her.
Dev 1 to Dev 2: is it common for her not to follow the design guidelines?
Dev 2: yeah man.. We just have to adapt her design into our app guidelines.
*sigh
Dev 2: there's a new icon here on this screen, so you wanna change the icon? Can I have the icon file?
She: oh.. No.. Use back the old one, because I just copy and paste.
Dev 1: so... This progress bar of yours, doesn't show its background colour, because you filled it already. So what's the background colour if the bar isn't filled?
She : hmm.... Oh.. Well.. Maybe try x.. ? *doesn't look nice* how about Y? *doesn't look nice* how about...
Me : why not you try in your computer first instead of me changing it here by code, it's much faster this way.
*seriously, wth?
Dev 1 and 2: there's additional text in your new design, what is it for?
She : oh.. No no. I copied extra due to copy and paste. Just ignore it.
Dev 1 and 2: what's the spacing gap between x and Y? And how about the size of the box?
She : oh.. I just estimate it, and for the box, not sure either, you can follow old design, because I'm just putting a box there for illustration purpose.
Mother fickle, what fuck man.
Dev 1 and 2: *flips table.
*we didn't, but.. It's freaking annoying.7 -
Dev: Hay dude , look this page is broken, how long has it been like this.
Me: No? 🤔, Weren't you working on the Database for this yesterday?
Dev: I didn't change anything yet...
Me: Okay, let's do a git bisect and see where this came from.
...After going back in history and checking out like 3 commits.
Dev: It's fine I'll just search for it
Me: 😕, that's what we are doing the bisect for?
Dev: But we've already looked at so many!?
...After some time of convincing, finds good commit, does the bisect and finds offending piece of code. The database details changed.
Me: okay so while it's still pointing to the old database it's working but switch it to the latest one and it breaks. You sure you didn't change anything?
Dev: I didn't do anything.
Me: okay well it seems to me like it must be a database issue, let me know what you find.
10min later...
Dev: Hay dude, soo I found it, I accidentally renamed a table
In my mind: 😲😲😲
I hate working at a company with bad practices like saving database config into git and not making a copy of the database when you intend to work on it, and not edit the f'ing live instance! Not even close to the luxury of migrations.1 -
I have a large code library I have been working on for over 10 years. I have nightmares about leaving it to another unfortunate dev. I'll have to work at this company the rest of my life.7
-
Just got made redundant 😒
Anyone need a web dev in Melbourne?
I have desirable skills such as working myself out of a job..9 -
Worst part of being a dev must be working with people who are not willing to change behavior because of arrogance. Oh - and then the constant OS wars talk. It really needs to stop. Like... Now5
-
The first time i made my own electron app, and saw it working and displaying live data the exact way i wanted it to be doing it.
At the same time, it was the first time i felt like been a real dev in all meanings. -
!rant I don't understand how a lot of you guys can work 10-14 hours a day! I see a lot of those messages and it makes me wonder if I am a lazy dev or something. After 8 hours of working I'm just exhausted and wanting to go home to my family :/12
-
Joined a new company / team to work on an iOS app that has 2 different backend environments "Dev" and "Prod". Also being referred to in iOS speak as "Debug" and "Release".
Been trying to get accounts on these backends (no sign up in app, its controlled via another process). Eventually get access to "Dev" for one of the regions, so I load up "Debug" and its not working.
This is odd, so I open the Android app and load "Dev" and it works? I then Notice Android has "Dev", "QA", "Staging" and "Prod" for every region where as iOS only has 2 of these.
So I go back to iOS and find the file for the settings and it has iOS Debug assigned a variable for the backend Dev ... which is actually pointing to QA. Because they use QA to Debug and not Dev.
... confused? join the club4 -
Welp. The startup I'm working for is going under. Ceo gave us zero hints.
I'm the lead dev and been working here for 6 months. Always built features before deadline, zero bugs, and going an extra mile. Can't say the same about the sales and marketing guys.
Kinda scared its gonna look bad. Oh you led a failed startup? Must be your fault.
Guess my side business is becoming full time now. Until new job.
#startup #9/10 #icebergahead2 -
So, I'm a CS student in a third world country. I love coding and I think i'm pretty good at it.
As I'm kind of poor, I'm pretty much constantly looking for any job I can take, and I've already done a dev gig at a software sweatshop here doing mostly PHP, JS and Android/Java... the dev experience was cool, but money was absolute crap ($1.5USD/hour at the current rate, working 9h/day Mon-Sat, did it while in vacation). Better than min wage in my country but still, looking at the numbers I see from programmers all over the world... it was practically working for free. The real problem is almost every dev job here is similar, so I was looking into going remote but every opportunity I see is for seniors/people with 2-3 years experience or more.
Can you give me some tips on getting a remote job as a student/recent grad with little experience? What would you do in my position? Any input is greatly appreciated!17 -
!dev (or maybe dev? Idk)
I'm a strong starter but not a strong finisher. I have rarely ever enjoyed putting "final touches" on anything. This is why I would appreciate working with someone who's a strong finisher and is not a credit-thief. But in this day and age for some absurd reason one must be both a strong starter and a strong finisher. One should be a complete person. 🙄8 -
Pathetic dev moments: Any time my macbook fans rev up, I worry that I'm working my baby too hard, so I start closing applications.3
-
Worst part of being a dev...working for a company that doesn't understand your potential. Knowing that you can do so much more than they are but being limited due to a myriad of excuses, budget, time, user base, etc.3
-
Why does FireFox has the shittiest dev tools?
Working on my website and it kept throwing "TypeError: Failed to fetch"
with no other info
Opened Chrome and that thing gave me the entire error without even modifying my logs code, and now I can peacefully solve the problem -.-11 -
Because DevOps in a lot of organizations is really “help desk for clueless developers”, conversations like this happen a lot:
Dev “hey the thing seems to be not working right”
Me “what does that even mean? I need you to be a good deal more specific. What thing. What isn’t working?”
Dev “I dunno”
Me “Are there error messages?”
Dev “yes”
Me “….would you like to share them with me?”
Dev *sends error*
Me “ok did you actually read this error message?”
Dev “yes”
Me “…so you’re good then? It says you’re trying to use a variable that hasn’t been declared yet. You should fix that. “
Dev “…”
Me “good luck”13 -
Prior to becoming a dev, one of my numerous jobs was working at Quiznos. They would often send me outside in the cup costume where I would dance around like a fool.
People would throw things...
What was your pre-dev "career"?12 -
Giving up/panicking/talking myself down when shit gets difficult ;/.
I always want stuff to work immediately, and I hate it when I don't understand something.
But since this is such a big part of working in dev, I should learn to keep going!2 -
Working with this dev who loaded bootstrap, then went on and defined his own class for every freaking helper class in bootstrap..9
-
Me: I deprecate a react component, because it's bloated and no longer makes sense, and I let everyone on the team know that we're working to get rid of that component
Other Dev: Hmm, if I copy this component for every time that it is used, rename all of my copy's and delete the original, I got rid of the deprecated component...
Me: After hearing that deprecated component was removed... "Good job other Dev"
Me: A couple of weeks later after dev leaves company and I start adding some new features to the app "WTF" -
What do you do when another dev overwrites/changes your working code without telling you, only because s/he cannot understand how your code works?
And your code was working fine, mind you, no bugs or anything, and is following recommended guidelines/standards. It's just that this other dev has a different coding style and prefers to rewrite everything his/her way even if it means breaking up otherwise sound logic.7 -
Having trouble logging into an app I am suppose to be working on with another dev. Debugging and found this:
// TODO: Temporary Optional because the API is not working properly
... i'm not happy for so many reasons -
- graduate
- get a C# certification
- finish all my current projects
- start working
!dev : put some money aside1 -
Hopefully, i will start working as a full stack web dev. Starting from next month.
May the programming gods be with me and my code.8 -
This is my bottom drawer. That's +150 packets of honey from the cafe downstairs. I've been slowly collecting them since I started working here. I'm leaving soon and thinking about leaving them so the next dev can have a pleasant surprise 😂8
-
Developer who was working on a project for 7 weeks was fired and to spite the company he deletes all his source code for the project. As the only other dev, I was placed with the wonderful task to complete an 8 week program in 8 days.8
-
Was working on a bug with another dev one time. He was hovered over my shoulder pretty closely when someone stopped by the cube and said "What's going on?" His response: "We're bobsled programming".
-
I guess I've just got the ideal dev job. Working from home, with nice people in my team and enough time to deliver quality work.8
-
Sorry fellow dev from another company, we really appreciated your help even though it was your free day. There is little chance you are also on devRant, but if you are we cant thank you enough debugging the dll provided by you and even supplying us with a dev version in which you made some changes for us to perform some extra tests. The changes looks promising as far as we have seen for now.
This might save our asses. -
Me: Im testing a new feature that is not on production yet for 30m and can not make it work. (I asked the developer for any idea why is not working)
Dev: i just tested, works fine.
Me: i just tested again with no luck. I’m i missing anything?
Dev: (Developer comes to my desk). Lets see what you doing wrong here. (After 5seconds). You're not on UAT. You have been redirected to the production and you've been testing there all this time.
Me: 😩 -
Working on a 6 months long project with delivery scheduled in one more month.. Now my manager says we either ship it in 6 dev days or he gets fired.8
-
My co-worker, still studying but working as a "senior dev", just decided that we don't need a test/staging environment anymore. We just "validate" (we also don't use the word "test" anymore) newly created features in production.
Makes absolutely sense...
Thank god I have a new job from february on!1 -
My biggest regret working for a company that is not willing to buy decent dev machine when they actually can afford it.
-
Client: "But why isn't it working. It should work"
Dev: "Sorry but it's not in your requirements"
Client: "But it should work"
fffockins 😡1 -
Context:
Me, Front-end Developer, Javascript stuff
---
Junior Dev: Hey xxzer0, could you help me with this? I spent the entire day on it and at this point, I think I just broke Chrome.
xxzer0: *---* Okay, let me see.
Junior Dev: Do you see it? I am updating the Javascript code but it's not working at all. The browser is not even loading it... Literally, the code I just wrote is not there.
**
Now be me, be the fucking idiot I was and I have been my whole life, I already knew what was going on because I lost a fucking day on it as this guy.
**
xxzer0: Well, let me see just one thing...
'Open Chrome Dev Tools' -> 'Network' -> 'Disable Cache'.
xxzer0: Now try again...
Junior Dev: What are you..doi........ IT'S WORKING! O.O
Chrome, I love you but sometimes I wish you could make this more "accessible" to newcomers.5 -
As a software engineer, I’ve only *ever* worked remotely. I honestly have no idea what it’s like working in an office as a dev/engineer. Probably makes me weird. 😅
What did you like about working in an office, if you’ve had that experience? Was mentoring different? What did you dislike about it?29 -
Joins Skype group dev talk
20mins in mutes microphone
Co worker mentions something I am working on
Me: starts talking for a minute
Coworker: randomly interrupts me, like legit no warning, he just started talking....
Me: wait what da faq
OH wait I'm not mute....
Shit -
Overheard a conversation...
Dev: We should focus on getting it working in production, then we can copy it over to dev so we have a working version.
Me: da fuq?4 -
Me ( a python dev) pointing to a good java joke in dev rant to my brother who happens to be working at TCS for the past 5 years as a Java Developer...
Me: Java is shit...
He: huh java is the best! every language in the world is written over java. My manager said this.
Me: I think I will kill him today in his sleep.4 -
Hi everyone, I'm a dev and work with ADVPL here in Brazil, I always wanted see my gitlab changing while I'm working in a project and now finally I can see it!17
-
>be web designer at last company
>be put into marketing Dept
>do everything from design to dev, working closely with engineers in IT Dept
>whyamihere.png
>leave to join new tech startup
>get job title "Web Developer"
>startup forms a new marketing Dept
>be put into it3 -
Do you ever cringe on the code you've written a few years before?
When I started as an intern in the same company I'm working for now, I was a solo dev on an internal tool.
It's web based and used for employee management.
I've cloned the repo to see how I did.
And to say the least, I wish I had an experienced dev to oversee me...
I'll never leave an intern unattended from now on if I know about them.4 -
The whole office thinks I'm working on a serious dev. I'm just running dev rant APIs on cmd and scroling.Happy Friday!2
-
Being a Dev has its perks.
Started working a couple hours ago (yep, on a Saturday night) to get some code working for a demonstration of a system prototype on Monday.
The code in question was some recursive directory traversal tied in with some file generation in NodeJS. 2 hours later I nailed it, and the feeling of satisfaction of having that code working on all of your tests is overwhelming.
It's a different kind of excitement compared to sitting behind your desk at the office.1 -
After I graduated, I found a junior job in a company where I already knew the only dev, who has been working there for 6 years. Immediately after I signed the contract, the manager told me that the other guy was leaving the company in one month... Horror!7
-
So Chrome 63 automatically forces https to anyone working with a domain name finishing with ".dev". Thank you a lot, I was planning on loosing 4 hours of my time figuring this out.6
-
The human in me knows casting a datetime to a decimal(20, 12) is fairly future-proof.
The dev in me is worried someone working at the same company in 273669 years will get mad at him.5 -
Me: Im testing a new feature that is not on production yet for 30m and can not make it work. (I asked the developer for any idea why is not working)
Dev: i just tested, works fine.
Me: i just tested again with no luck. I’m i missing anything?
Dev: (Developer comes to my desk). Lets see what you doing wrong here. (After 5seconds). You have been redirected to the production site and you've been testing there all this time.
Me: 😩1 -
New dev hired to assist me told the boss that he was going to refactor the code to improve stability.
He converted all my fragments into activities. Because he didn't understand working with the back stack. Now everyone is asking me what happened.3 -
That awkward moment when you're only dev working on almost dead project and you start making changes in production and then move it to development servers 😬4
-
> be new in a big-ish company
> be working next to a senior dev, who's been working on The Project for 5 months now (15 yrs in company)
> be asked for halp
> senior dev didn't know how to use git push
GIT PUSH
> be Joe's terminally flaccid dick2 -
Managers should not communicate with a customer then sit on it for a week or two before passing it to a Dev as high priority/fix it now. They also should not say our 'team' is working on it when that team is one person who is also busy with other tasks.1
-
I’m currently watching Stargate SG1 (tok’ra 2/2) and by goa’uld (sorry) I’d love to be part of a dev team working on a stargete MMO!4
-
Upwork is absolute GARBAGE.
PLEASE tell me alternative to find a job as a dev and work remotely. I have to work for foreign international software company.
I cant be working for my local city companies because the salary even for engineers is TRASH2 -
Boss yelled at lead mobile dev for low productivity because the project manager present him wrong timetables and added accidentally one more week of work.
Next day boss yelled at the lead mobile dev cause the back end wasnt working well.
Project manager and lead back end developer enjoy life! Front is hell :P5 -
dev: “I want to start working on [feature]”
Me: “I already started to work on it, sorry for not mentioning it, we need specs from design team before I can go on, but I’d suggest going for another task meanwhile”
Manager: “noooo design is very very busy, [dev] will take care of it.”
Me: “[dev] still needs specs from the design team... and I am half done with it so no real point in re-writing the same code I wrote”
Manager: “just trust me, we do this and [dev] takes care of it.”
*me and [dev] look at each other perplexed and just nod to the manager cause it’s Thursday and the fucks to give are over*
... am I actually a patient in an asylum? I question my sanity after this exchange of words.2 -
Working on a site made by a previous dev, trying to do some style changes. See comment that I need to compile from SASS. SASS files are NOWHERE TO BE FOUND... FFS!!! I'M GOING TO FIND YOU AND SHOVE THAT CSS UP YOUR ARSE!!!9
-
So two guys at the company I work for just quitted, We were 4 in the "dev" department, 2 front end and 2 back end, now we're just 1 front and 1 back, should I try to get a raise?? I've been working steady for 8 months now.4
-
Hi guys! Im jr dev and i had a great week! My girlfriend letf my house :'( but my project it's working very well on production. It's not a prank!
#TrueStory7 -
Working with someone that thinks he's a dev but couldn't program a hello world if he tried. Turns a small project into a huge headache.2
-
!dev but devRant has become "not dev" sadly.
Time to say bye to the racist kindergarden it has become!
How many more outdated country clichés can they possible come up with? "Thick Indian accent", "hard-working Nazi Germans" bla bla bla ...
If you're not interested in dev anymore why don't you join the European Parliament or a local pub where you can discuss your "ethnic" bullshit with other right-wing retards dreaming of remigration. Fuck you idiots, seriously!
/me logs off.7 -
After 1 year of working as android dev and coding in java, finally switched to another startup where everything is in Kotlin where I will be the only one maintaining that project.
Me: This code has almost no comments
Senior dev: Code is pretty self explanatory
FML
At least she spent 4 days with me and walked me through the code, so I'm not totally lost which is great!2 -
Just tried out Minecraft's shader mod SEUS and wondering what the fuck am I doing with my life being a web dev and not working on graphics.
If you have an nvidia gpu, please give it a try.
This is an example with PBR textures, it's mind blowing https://youtu.be/RbM5w9CBDIw
INB4 comment like "peasant web dev wants to do graphics lmao"11 -
I’m 2 months into my current job at a startup, and I’m starting to lose it. My PM doesn’t have any background in tech, features keep changing every week, and more requirements are added every other day.
To make things worse, I’m the only dev on board right now, despite the company burning ~$80k on a sweatshop to deliver code that’s barely half working.
When I asked if they’re getting another dev onboard, the co-founders said they couldn’t justify another dev since they blew a fat load on that sweatshop…
Time to get on the leetcode grind again 🙃2 -
I was told the other dev hadn't enough time anymore to maintain this 20-year-old project, because he did it in his free time and we should transition from working together, learning the code, etc to me maintaining the whole thing with the other dev providing the knowledge about his program.
So, we had one meeting where I got the current state of the program and never really heard from the other dev again.
This thing was written in C and quite a mess (it still is, who needs refactoring...) and I have never programmed in C before. Needless to say, I learnt a lot.7 -
Been sick all day, got to work from home. Kid goes down for a nap, my wife leaves to run her errands. Finally starting to get into my groove after blah-ing most of the day. So of course my kid decides to wake up earlier than expected. :P2
-
When you're working on something all day and then the senior dev swoops in and answers your question in 5 minutes.
-
!dev
(somewhat related - https://devrant.com/rants/2267398/... - it's same guy)
So today he came "our website is down" and started to act like end of world came. Than he sent us screenshot (not made by him, made by customer) that site is down.
He didn't even checked himself.
Sure enough, there was typpo in URL. something like exxample.com
lol. It's not been an hour and bullshit all over the place already starts ;-;2 -
So I was excited about working on a proyect I recently was invited to work on, but when I finally got my hands on the code I felt this urge to scream "YOU FUCKER!!!" (the dev responsible for the code)6
-
Oh my effing goodness...just went through the repo of an app we're working on and this new dev in our team saved his commits with, "ok", "done", "fixed", "another one", "arrggghhh!", "wow!"..."not complete"...for fucks sakes...DUDE!1
-
I hate my brain.
When I want to program it's always when I'm outside doing chores, on a trip or when I'm at my non-dev job.
When I finally get home and ready for working on projects my brain feels like watching Schwarzenegger films instead.
Fuck you brain.1 -
I had rough week last week. Accidentally deployed dev code to production, soon found out there was no production version of code to do a redeploy. Deployed another app to production, it was working fine then another Dev changed a data type in the database from bool to nullable Boolean which broke some Linq queries. Looked like I deployed crap code. 3rd week with company.
-
Unlocks the phone one day:
"Google Play has stopped working"
I havent used this shit since i installed dev rant (3 months)
10/10 development, google you are the best2 -
Worse dev experience: Working for a company that had a monopoly in the market. They have Dinosaurs that didn't want to upgrade the user experience at all because of the company's hold on the market and their lack of forward thinking. It's a privately held company that is hard to get terminated. It was frustrating because they could do more but didn't so I'm looking to compete once my non-compete is up.
Best dev experience : Quitting the aforementioned job and getting another one. 😎6 -
- my (non-dev) supervisor at my job
- no documentation
- no source control
- people working in the same team with completely different programming/domain knowledge levels, but also very different ways of being
- bad within-project communication
Luckily not all of them are about my job. We do use source control.8 -
[Working on some really "urgent" report for an about to publish project]
dev: client, can you explain what this value is? we can't figure it out and we though tha...
client: im gonna stop you right there, DO NOT Analyse! we dont have time for silly questions, if the design says there's a 10, just put that freaking 10 in that place...
dev: but sr, we need to...
Client: what did i say? just stop saying things and build it!2 -
Shoutout to all my fellow ranters with boring ass non dev related jobs! Working in a shop to get myself through uni sucks2
-
company lands huge enterprise project
promises client to deliver it in MIN_TIME_REQUIRED/4
No architect, no technical lead, no seniors, no designer just juniors and interns in the project.
all the project time wasted by manager making shit decisions and not giving a fuck what devs have to say about how project will be disaster if goes like this.
Now the project is officially under raging fire
Boss to dev : What happend to the project. Why are things not working?
Dev: You made decisions not us.
Boss: I don't buy it. Work 24hrs until this is done.
Dev: F*** you and this project. I am resigning. -
just woke up in the middle of the night dreaming of merging some branches after working a 16 hour shift straight because my company is too fucking broke to hire another freakin' dev...
well fuck it who needs sleep at all! let's get some coffee...undefined coffee to the rescue no sleep oh god why cheap ass company shitty monolithic java crap fml pls stahp2 -
So i left my job as an android dev earlier (nothing big, just didnt wanna juggle school and work) and as the year started i noticed that somehow i ended up working as an android dev again but this time in c#. There's no escape.9
-
So I thought of a great idea while I wrote a comment.
The best way to trap a dev would be to leave a computer that's halfway through installing Arch Linux the dev will see it and start working on it. The capture time will be between 5-12 hours depending on the dev's masochism rate.3 -
Started new job today with another dev working on a different project. Told him I was hired as front end dev but was a full stack wanna-be. He said he mainly coded in php/java. In the course of the conversation I asked him what is preferred IDE/editor was, telling his I liked Sublime text but was warming up to VS code. He said he never heard of Sublime Text and only used Notepad++.12
-
I've started learning shell scripting to help me write npm scripts for my web dev workflows. I'm actually really enjoying working with the shell.2
-
** Chatting to a Dev and a normal being**
Dev: Damn Linux command isn't working!
Me: Try Sudo
Normal Being: ... Are u guys cooking meth or something?? 😱
Me: LEAVE 👉🚪 -
one of my friend is new to frontend dev.
and he's trying to center a div (text).
using position absolute and relative.
It's not working BTW.
We're communicating over text.
Must be loosing his mind.
He'll finally understand center div memes.6 -
*So I have a function where the date is formatted as 20180317 and get returned if I pass a date to it.*
Junior Dev: I'm selecting March as a month but it's showing 20180217 and not 20180317, what should I do?
Me: I've written function for formatting date just go there and there will be date.getMonth() just add 1 to it by doing +1.
Junior Dev: It's still not working!!!.
So I went there and checked what she did, and she did this .....
date.getMonth(+1);2 -
Thanks, AfterShip.com, for working flawlessly while the system I was building was in dev/test mode and for the first few days in live mode, then completely crapping the bed the first day I needed you to work with real tracking data with the live system. You were the ONE thing that was working consistently well, and you had to go and ruin it.4
-
Spent 3 weeks working on an issue (raised by dev A) by following the suggested solution stated in the issue.
Pushed a PR and got told by dev B that it's not the correct solution.
Dude, I am just an intern here and following whatever they told me to do. If you have a problem with the solution, please discuss it with dev A.
Now I may have to let go of the issue completely because it turns out to be much more complicated, not for someone with intern level skill.
FML, I guess this won't be the last time I had this right?7 -
Not a rant, but I was offered dev positions at 2 companies. Excited to start working as a developer! I guess I'll get to post actual rants soon.2
-
I created fully working sudoku in excel...
And then I really wanted to know to create websites.
The feeling in the moments when I got things to work made want to be dev...4 -
For the past 19 years of life, I've loved Thanksgiving break because it was an escape from school or a job I hated. But now that I work as a dev, I miss working on my project and can't wait to go back!2
-
Just got my Linux dev environment set up, even got an alias working that would launch all the software I needed to test my code. Then today decided to change primary drives. At least I know how to set it back up next time, right?2
-
I got fired from my first real dev job after two weeks for working to slow... If anyone wants to help me look for my self-esteem, pick up a shovel and start diggin'.3
-
One of dev I was working with once stored users' payment data in plain text. Luckily enough that thing never got to production.
-
Estimating time before consulting the dev on the task he/she will be working on is like pouring the milk in before the cereal. CRINGE.3
-
Exhausted from the main project so working on another, smaller project is the dev equivalent of checking phone after getting tired from using laptop/PC
-
There's a senior dev at work who deflects and delays every project while working on his own freelance jobs most of the day. Fortunately, my performance is not tied to his.
Hero, or villain?7 -
I don't know how to feel about this: in the dev team I am the only one working with a dark theme.
Are they real developers? Where am I?6 -
*Developer working from home*
Dev -- Make me some coffee
Wife -- *no response*
Dev -- sudo make me some coffee
Wife -- It's not gonna work on me !!!4 -
One dev starts db migrations for staging...
Four devs stop working cause their tables no longer exist...
Best Friday Ever
#devRantBreak -
It's 6pm here, running out of scotch. Writing a backend for telegram bot. Seems like I need to step out to get some scotch
-
I just became an android dev last week, yay for me. Though, I really hate how I inherited more than 50k lines of spaghetti!
They ask me to fix this and that, but that's okay for me, I can manage this.
The worst thing is we don't use any kind of version control system. And I'm always tasked to merge my work with other 2 android dev working on same spaghetti.1 -
What a joy working in a company that uses git as if it's subversion (dev branches? What are dev branches?) paired with gerrit. Getting a single, crucial change pushed to the actual repo can take days. The speed of the site can be measured in geological epochs. The interface has a charm of windows 95. Half of the builds are broken. Life is fleeting and I'm wasting it here.7
-
Me and Team Developer,
One day he was calling some apis and getting error
Dev - Hey , the apis seem not to work
Me - Ohk which api, i will Check
Dev - Ohk here is the api and issue
Me - Spent time in checking multiple values for same api, and...
it was working fine with no issue.
Me- SO i asked him to check again
Dev- he again said, still the issue
Me- Ohk give me the same input to try
Dev - Ohk Here is the id of the record
Me - Tested and not working... more tested and got issue like, the id was for some other record, and not actual id he need to call
Me- I told the Dev that he was sending wrong id.
Dev - Ohh Shit, i will check
Me - Yeah, let me know
Dev - Yeah , its working and i wasted 3 days just for this issue.
Me - I said yeah Ohk Fine. (Me Frustrated, as time wasted due to the input issue not mine Api)
Most of the time, this happens and i have to jump to solve. Can Anyone related to this happen with you or your team ?
Comment below7 -
A dev I'm working with sends me an Android build for me to test, along with the following caption that put a smile on my face.
G'day,
Here's a new build that should have addressed most of the issues from your previous testing, as well as almost certainly creating countless others -
Trying to explain a game developer in a community, why its a bad idea to only make client side patches for equiptment to appear correctly..
me: because the server needs to be aware of the changes made to avoid faulty calculations, for instance if the client calculates a fatal but the server disagree..
dev: but it works...
me: yes, but not optimally.
dev: Working as intended (TM)
me: ... teh fuq?
not sure if he's a bad troll or wut..1 -
Is the office dead in the dev world? Does everyone prefer to work remote from home, coffee shops or Coworking spaces? Or is there still value in working as a team irl, but modern office culture is killing it?24
-
Build pipelines are awesome. What's not awesome is forgetting the 'pipeline' bit.
Sure, let's have each TeamCity job in the 'pipeline' build the deployable from different places! You must manually merge your code from dev to test to release.
What's that? The functionality working in dev isn't there in production? I wonder how that happened. -
Best part of being a (freelance) dev : working from home, being able to see my newborn son slowly growing up. Not easy to run after clients days after days, but I don't regret the silly project managers, the dumbasses from the marketing, and, gosh, I don't miss the CTOs. :)1
-
I'm working with a consultant group at my company to implement a new authentication strategy for our entire platform.
The senior dev lead from the consultant group has 25+ years consulting and claims to have written a web browser for the blind and all sorts of in-depth accessibility things.
Stakeholders tell us "Don't forget about accessibility compliance on this project"
Senior dev lead with all this claimed accessibility experience asks me, "What does accessibility mean?"2 -
Still a student, working part time at a dev company, doing small work 'cause they have nothing to make me do, and today the two person I'm supposed to work with are on leave...1
-
So they took my personal meeting just because there was delay in delivery due to other dev as he was working on shitloads of things and didn't get time to work on API and didn't gave me in time.
And they specifically called it "Doubt meeting" LMAO. -
!dev
Me: I have a shit ton of schoolwork to do
*Opens a google doc and start working on it*
*spends 20 minutes reformatting it because they way it was laid out annoys me*
Fuck this4 -
Fucking fuck !
I work with a senior Dev,
It’s pretty much like am working under him....
He’s like a great Dev no doubt about it
But !!!!
He’s a fucking dumbass when it comes to working in a team. He makes changes in my code without telling me. He says He forgot to tell me , every single time
When I ask him how a piece of code works , he says it’s pretty much obvious and acts like even a 6 year old kid Would know this ,
He doesn’t think 2 steps ahead before solving a problem usually creating another problem !
We were once working on a language which we weren’t very good at , so I suggested him to ask another Dev in our company about inputs on our code structure to which he completely Disagreed saying they really won’t know much and that he knows more than them..
Fucking dumbass thinks he knows more than most ...
I have tried confronting him multiple times but he feels but he just won’t listen...1 -
Fellow dev: I am trying to put a joomla site in git.. Maybe you can help
Me: Sure what's the problem.
Fellow dev: I added the .gitignore file but when I clone the site onto the server all the files in the .gitignore are missing.
Me: Any files you add to git ignore are ignored by .git.
Me: Dies a little bit inside, is guy has been working with for over a year. -
Working on a bug that in my opinion never worked. “Sr. Dev” dares to say the function has worked before. I’m a 100% sure it never did.
“Yes but everything is being tested before we go live.”
Dude, we have a monkey testing our stuff are you serious!?3 -
!dev
I like trying the local pißwasser of choice when traveling around. Sometimes it's bad (Baltika, fe). Working out of Glasgow atm, so it's irnbrü, kind of tastes like bubblegum. What's everyones' local drink du jour (alcoholic or otherwise)?31 -
Finishing up the last few edits on the WordPress site from hell, client is here to see the finished product, senior dev looks over at me "so are the registration/login forms and sign out button working correctly again?"
Me: "yeah I'm just checking one thing first-SON OF A BITCH"
senior: "that does not instill confidence that the forms are working"
Wasn't a big deal, forgot to close a div and, well you know how that works -
Working for unappreciative fucktard clients who believe they know more about dev than a seasoned professional and try to give me advise on how to approach my work and or solve programming issues. FUCK Sake if you know it then don't hire me you fucktard client.
My best experience is working for a small company and bridging their disconnected systems together using an array of programming languages such as Go, PHP, VB, Batch Script, Javascript and C -
As a dev, the present one. First year working as a dev since march. I learned a bajillion things and am being payed.
As a dev this was easily the most productive year of my life. -
I know local dev is hard in a complex system, but if tooling prevents you from working for an entire day something is seriously wrong.13
-
!Rant
After more than one year of searching for a dev job and finally working for some call center for one year cause I couldn't find any job who wanted to take me without any diploma, I finally got one as a php dev I'm happy but at the same time I stress cause I don't want to make any mistake and be fired. I'm starting Monday whish me good luck. I don't know if I'm more excited or more stressed I will know Monday.4 -
On an average, how many times a day does a dev think about offing themselves while working with azure cloud?1
-
As a junior dev, should I waste my times on Working on real world project or should I just solve leetcode questions all days long (interview questions in general)?
Which one is better for me as a learner?7 -
Finally performing that dev rite of passage: working on my personal site.
Would have done it sooner if I had design skills.5 -
To be fair, I don't have my degree yet (just two more semesters...) but I'm working as a dev second year now and studying is really nothing compared to real-world experience. Yeah, I know I haven't said nothing new.1
-
!rant
I am working at the university as a web dev. Recently we were requested to create a registration system for upcoming knowledge olimpics in a little time. We finished it in the middle of february and until now, only 5 people have registered for the tournaments. -
So asked to help out on an extra project that another Dev ( who is a senior developer ) is working on and I go to clone the repo but find 15 or so commit messages on the master branch saying "Work on feature x" (not an actual x). This is going to be fun...
-
Well this would be the first post of myself in the past two years of dev life.
Hi fellas, I wanted to be a serious pro programmer. Even though I was working in a large scale enterprise product, I often feel like missing some awe(want to settle a job in Google) in my dev life. I managed to grasp and play profoundly in some trending and hot techies like Angular, React, Electron, Laravel, Symfony, Extjs, Spring....I still feel unlucky. :(1 -
I feel there aren't enough tutorials on "best practices" when it comes to combining server/client tooling in a monorepo.
Having done so this weekend, the tasks involved were:
* using graphql w/ express to serve requests and expose a "graphiql" ide instance
* differentiating build steps in prod vs. dev
* applying middleware in prod vs. dev
* working with a single heroku dyno
Still missing:
* hot reloading
* my general sense of direction -
Working as a junior dev with Js, moment.js, php and MySQL dates and trying make them respect (not love) each other and talk to each other nicely...
OH GOD WHY AM I DOING THIS MYSELF, JUST DIE IN MY SLEEP ALREADY, MY MOTHER TOLD ME I SHOULD BE A DOCTOR1 -
How to make a shitty job, shittier... Having to fight to keep a wifi connection every single day, working on a remote windows system, on a POS laptop running an even more locked down windoze install than the freaking Dev VDI. Good Lord this is devastating...1
-
I hate working with sh*tty Devs
I used that term specifically.. No it's not about juniors, it's about those who pretend to be seniors.
In a major company project, one of us has to take a week or two to refactor that one "senior" dev work. When tested it performs poorly, when checked, it violates every SE principle and the business people are wondering why we keep seeing `refactoring User Stories/Tasks` and why we still don't have a working project yet. Yes, we will never have, that mess that `senior` dev created is almost impossible to refactor without major rework.
Now, major rework coming, we need to give something to that Senior so he doesn't feel left behind. Argue to never let him get anything in core or this company will go under...
In short, I hate working with sh*tty devs.1 -
Been working on a backend-service, sending notifications to our app. Shit didn’t work in backend. I made some adjustments, commited and pushed. Didn’t think it would work and just went home.
Our tester had a app-version connected to my dev-server(Continous Delivery from my last commit). Got an email. ”I see you got the notifications working”. I had a high polling-rate in backend for testing. He got spammed lol
At least my code worked 😂1 -
Ok so I'm a dev at a small tech company and I've been working here for 3 months now and I've done 0 dev10
-
!rant
Hello guys, a spy here. Working as a software tester, currently doing automation with Robot Framework, learning some Python on the way. Came to read about dev things. I really like it so far.2 -
Any developers here working in a creative agency using Unity/Game dev skillsets? Would love to hear your thoughts and experiences.5
-
!dev
So I work at a monitoring station (yeah not a professional dev yet), so basically our entire day is spent on the phone. Yesterday morning, our phone system broke. Everyone is getting calls from all departments. Even departments they're not in.
As if my job isn't stressful enough as it is, now this fucking thing happens, and whattya know, shit still isn't working today... -
What do you guys think is the proper retirement age for a dev , i am thinking 35 to 40 for me
Can’t continue working for other companies after that9 -
Since last update (version 63) Google chrome forces all *.dev domains to use https. Guess who used a *.dev domain for his local development virtual machine and now have to switch to *.local ...
Removing the HSTS Rule from chrome seems not to be possible and surprisingly I could not use a self signed SSL certificate to make it working again.3 -
When your co-dev keeps forgetting to push his code to the remote repo and you're stuck during the weekends without his new changes and he is not working1
-
Best: realizing that development could be a career and switching to it as a major
Worst: first dev job working on a 15 year old legacy visual basic project with over 3 million lines -
i am indeed working for some fun litte projects with the Dev Rant Unofficial Wrapper API and it looks good to use it! Now. Lets make some Action!2
-
Chose going to a 21'st I didn't want to go to instead of drinking at home and working... Half regretting this...
Send a fellow dev help -
Started working with a startup. They have one Dev guy, who for some reason is using both python 3 and 2 in the same git repo, and had no requirement.txt or anything to really track dependencies....
For fuck sake, the Dev guy is actually intelligent, but really freaking messy.. why can't he have this basic thing done...1 -
I have being working on a project with server side using PHP. My dev environment is XAMPP on Debian. PHP is 7.3.10. So.... no MCrypt. Documents said that a new kid called Sodium is in town but php said he doesn’t know this guy...
I have no encryption library...14 -
working memory I think I have
> what my work practise require
> average dev self estimation
> what average dev have
> what I have
> what I think I have, when I cannot live up to the expectation of my working practises.
> A fucking goldfish
DAMNIT CHANGE MY DAMN PRACTISES... or I just keept it functional languange completly... -
!rant
This situation, when you are working as external employee in a company that needs you to test safety-critical systems.
You wait months for "THE" (internal) test tool you have to use to implement your specified tests.
Finally , you meet with the responsible dev guy to let him setup everything.
Me: Hi, I'm here for setting up the test tool for project XY
Dev: Eh? No one (manger) ordered the tool for project XY!
Me: -
Figma dev mode sucks so hard I dont get why people seem to like it so much.
It was working fine before and now I have to throw away my complete workflow because of their bullshit beta.
They stripped many features which were working fine before for their fancy bullshit.
Instead of fixing existing issues they just add new bugs.
I cant even get the distance between two elements.
Fuck you Figma.2 -
So any unity dev has advice, documents, tutorial suggestions on creating resuable libraries, packages?
I'm working on a library for the company, and want people to use it as easy and comfortable as possible.4 -
Dev companies, please, stop trying to force proxies to your devs... you just make us waste more time figuring out how to avoid it rather than working as we really want.
-
Some stats on what I've been doing all 2020:
222 working days.
60% of the days, working on dev stuff.
80% of the days, working on 2nd responsibility (legal documentation for clients).
From April, 60% of the 222 days working on the 3rd responsibility I got assigned in, you guessed it, April (KPI making).
So basically 70% of my job is no longer what I signed up for.
That's what I want to change this year. -
In today’s 6 hours lab, I spent 2 hours working and 4 hours solving other people’s problems. I guess I am ready to be a senior dev or a tech support 🤔
-
The only advice I ever got about transitioning from a dev student to actually working in the dev world came when I was on my first semester in an elevator from a random person who already had a job in dev. Not her words, but paraphrased later by someone else:
"The only qualification you really need to make it just fine is the ability to utilise search engines better than the average gorilla"
... and she was right. Also, never before had I noticed, and I was dumbfounded when I did, how bad people actually were at searching for information.2 -
junior dev looking at requirements for first job:
"We want to hire someone fresh out of college but they need to of started working at the age of 14."3 -
To all the remote devs out there, I pose some questions.
Do you prefer working remote?
And what are your personal pros and cons for remote dev positions.16 -
I'm done with all dev tasks. I don't know how am I supposed to spend next 5-6 hours :-/
Not interested in working on pet projects either.3 -
I'm losing faith in my future right now!
I'm dying working for my current employer (read my last two rants) but no one wants to hire me and I'm not sure whether it's my skills, little experience or only halftime availability until I finish studies!
Also, while I'm at it, there are second to none game dev workplaces here, in Poznań (and working as a game dev is a dream <3).1 -
keep working as web dev in my shithole country until i could land a remote job that pays at least 30k$ yearly6
-
Im currently working on a third world Software Dev Agency as Backend Engineer for 250 bucks. My friend, with same experience than me, got a job on an startup and is getting 4k as Frontend Engineer with something of Backend. Yes, i tried to apply at startups too, but no response never.13
-
Started working at the same year and this is our 1st decade as a web dev, he still doesn’t know git and what Apache is.
-
Just finished my Web Dev internship!! i'm so cheeeringg!, What i can say is from experience it was definitely fun meeting many new faces ,making some new friends and working with some great technologies :D6
-
Hey, does anyone have experience working as a Dev without a degree in France ?
My girlfriend would like to take up programming, but doesn't really believe she can find a job once she's ready.1 -
The part I hate the most about working as a dev is writing the docs. The sad thing is that I need to do it on Friday (which is weekend here) as well for my private project (a python library)
-
Supp guys? Quick question: has anyone ever had a dev / it job in which he wasn't stuck in a office, but he was working outdoor / supporting scientist ecc... like let's say on a archeology site, or just anything out of the ordinary developer comfort zone...just curious5
-
learning to code while working as not a dev. Gives freedom but zero experience. Need experience but lack confidence :(6
-
Just got added to a few repos of iOS/Android apps that I'll be working on for a new client. All of which only have 2-3 commits and no further history. Guessing the previous dev was using drop box or something, I'm a little concerned.
-
how many devs working in your company and (thats the actual question) how many leaders manages dev teams?3
-
I've been working as a web dev intern for my college's IT department for about three weeks now. Knowing that I have the access to the cms, file server and database... Muhahahahahahahahahaha😈 but I guess I will be a good boy and only screw around in my test environment.
-
I have a weird problem ...
There’s an existing swift app, with Apple sign in implemented and working.
When I took over I had to revoke app certificates and create new one. Since then the Apple sign in stopped working.
I’ve tried clean rebuild etc , even tried renewing old profiles with the new cert but nothing is working.
When u do Apple sign in it says “sign up not completed” with no error msg.
Old dev says it happened last time when cert/profile was changed but fixed on proper rebuild. Not fixing for me.
Anybody else faced this?5 -
Started working on opening my own dev agency. Does anyone here have experience with getting leads (clients)?2
-
Arghhhhh working with regular expressions (already a bad start) got it working on my dev PC but it won't work on the server.
The only difference is my pc is running PCRE v8.41 and my server is running v8.42. Can't find anyone else having the same issue on SO/Google8 -
So my girlfriend started working as a dev at her company. She was a technical writer and got promoted. She is now working in maintaining code from previous projects.
Now comes the questions
"how do this?"2 -
Best: working on a cool xamarin project for a few months with a very cool client which made me a better dev;
Worst: working on a shitty legacy web - a clusterfuck of technologies, crappy workarounds and even shittier clients for the rest of the year; -
Hey all.
I have a non-technical question.
I'm a university drop out for financial reasons where i live and i have been working in the field for 8 years as a backend dev and some dev-ops on the side.
My question is what are my chances of finding a good job in europe (italy germany uk france ... Etc) without a degree?
And what is the range of my annual salary on average?
And thank you for your help.5 -
Seriously, is there even a single web dev in the world, working an a considerably large project, that can run `npm install` without a single warning? After sorting out the errors on the first ten attempts, that is.6
-
Do public Product Roadmaps scare any other devs? They always contain too many features in a short time span and dev working environment changes (moving to git, moving to vagrant etc..) just get ignored because “we can’t sell thoes changes”!1
-
So the project I'm working on atm and ranted about a couple of days ago... There is absolutely no documentation and the code is at least ten years old.
At least I can contact the old dev, but he's slower at replying, than reading the code through and figuring it out 😐1 -
That moment you're helping out a colleague with his ticket and stuff isn't working and you ask him.
Hey you do reset your cache right?
On which he replies yes of course I do.
10 minutes later you finally walk over to him and you see his browser open without Dev tools......... -
Two years without working on web dev. Planning to build a website.
Any frameworks that i should test?8 -
Co-op integration, day 2: Our developer assigned to the project called me at the end of the day:
dev: Can you come over to {other company} to help me tomorrow?
me: Why? What happened?
Dev: Our code isn't integration ready, so I can't start working...
me: Did you talk to the TL about it?
dev: yes.
me: what did he say?
dev: he said to call you... -
Every dev team has this chatterbox guy, who works as a support, does sometimes whole work in a hour, watches anime for following 7 hours and wants to fix the whole world with JQuery. Still can't imagine working and hanging out without him.
-
Wasted 2 years of my life working at a retail store den i decided fuck dis shit ama pursue dis web dev thing2
-
Fucking large ass corporate companies that outsource some apps with fucking internal politics. Can't decide the scope of what we're working and won't even let us decide or proceed with our dev.
-
Best: getting some awesome code buddies, making my first game for my college event
Worst: not able to work and even abandoning a game dev project I wanted to make for 2 years due to college stuff
But I hope i will start working on the game again next year🤞1 -
I spent ~12h working on a simple issue/bug.
7h was spent on rebuilding local dev environment which is a clusterfuck of maven profiles, tomcat, some autogenerated degeneracy, and 2 different build systems for JS.
5h spent on actual bug fixing, code reviews and so on.
FML2 -
Guys am working on a personal project involving the dev community and wanted to share this survey with you : https://goo.gl/forms/...
@dfox if this is inappropriate for devRant please take it down.
Thanks.2 -
Ideas for future weekly questions:
What's your favourite dev tech?
What's your favourite non-dev tech?
What do you think about privacy regulations in your country?
Story about maintaining / working with /refactoring legacy code.
Also, if you get in inspired by a questions suggested by someone, make sure to give credit where due! It would be awesome to see who's question we're answering. -
My biggest dev ambition is working on software that people care about, specifically, developers.
I would love to give back to the community at large since I would not be where I am at without all of the help I've found within it. -
Few days ago I started a new job in a big corp. Almost everyone are working on windows 10 machines.
I am a begging front end dev, who only worked on ubuntu.
Will windows be a problem?2 -
How do I know if I am pushing my work output too hard? How can I let my team know I'm not trying to make anyone look bad?
My CEO uses me as an example often of what a hard working dev looks like. I personally just enjoy working on the product. I don't like attention and I can't help but feel like I'm getting too much spotlight opposed to the other devs. 🤷4 -
So, while working on a story, I noticed something which the lead dev did that is now giving me problems.... and he's offline while in another building.
Ok, I'll just contact our PM to see how much is due today (visual happy path only or API call is needed too)...same state as lead dev.
Scrum master, the person who's in charge of contacting anyone... no flipping clue where she's at.
It's great being on such a small team!2 -
best thing being a dev?
working remote and thus having meetings with clients on visio wearing a fancy shirt while naked bottom.1 -
I spent 2 years as android dev, after that another 2 years as game dev (current work).
Now I wanna go back to being android dev but I kinda lost self confidence and feels like I'm starting from square 1. Also I will struggle explaining my 2 years gap of working with game development.
Feels like I'm a junior in the area. Feeling totally useless since the way I am now I couldn't even pass android dev interview or complete a tech task.
Having ADHD doesn't help with his. Having gained +25kg and being a fat fuck doesn't help also.
Fuck me.6 -
!DEV
My mice stopped moving "efortlessly".
So I added a bit of scotch. Mice is working again very well and you don;t feel the drag !!
Yeah I should update my keyboard / mice, as they are in horrible state.3 -
wk177 (least successful project)
A maps behemoth created by a single dev (↑). It took "only" 2 years to get a halfway proper version out. Said dev could have saved half of the time if he (well, his employer) bought the control from a company that has all their devs working on just that (.NET controls) and thus the dev wouldn't have had to reinvent the wheel with the very basic control of the map service provider.9 -
When you ask for a local dev server for ages so your not running on live environment and your given an iMac to use as a server /facepalm
And to make it worse... was asked if that iMac could still be used as a dev machine at the same time!
No I installed ESXi on it now (managed to get that working) massive facepalm1 -
If you are a freelance dev; how do you deal with clients that you don't want anymore?
For example: clients you have been working for a long time ago when your were younger/cheaper and knowing that they will never contact you again.5 -
being so incompetent i can't have a working dev environment across different workplaces and/or so cursed it happens to me repeatedly
-
Hi Everyone,
I am working as a jr front end developer and wanted to study more about performance profiling in Chrome and finding memory leaks using Dev tools. I searched online for a while and not able to find a nice place to start with, can anyone help me out with a resource from where I can start the debugging performance using Chrome Dev tools.
It would be very helpful. -
Worst part of being a dev?
I'm sure it is working on a problem for a long time that you forget what the problem was in the first place... -
Every day, the SM likes to come by the dev table and ask what our updates are (stalking jira + dev slack channel is apparently too boring).
He comes by every 2 hours.
Each time asking about how close I am to finishing not only the current feature but the other stories I have to work on too.
The other stores are not in progress, what makes you think I was working on them in the background of what I'm currently working on?
Doesn't help that we somehow keep adding stories mid sprint, -
Is glassdoors software engineer salaries acurate for Germany? I will be working near Darmstadt area, how does 65k gross for 4 years sw dev experience sound to you germans?8
-
How to do you guys take a 'shift' in your profile when working as a developer for some company?
Like if you are a web dev guy and want to get into native android dev or vice versa or start building apps for ios or getting into a complete different role of manager, dba, sysadmin or hr, or whatever there are profiles in a company?
Would your company allow you to take some 3-4 months course or would you do that i your spare time?7 -
A quick question, is the numbers in the degree matters for working as dev? Student here. Big thanks ✌️7
-
To convert to Resume
I am an asp.net dev who started working march - 2022.
I am the only dev in the team (CSD) from September - 2022(colleague gone on maternity leave).
Starting from January I have been training 2 freshers/intern.
Any ideas on how to convert this into resume points?3 -
Working from home since March 2020. I miss dev conferences, free swag excitement, and lunches with my colleagues.5
-
My biggest dev ambition is to build a cross-platform app in Flutter/Dart. I am working with my buddy to do so currently.
-
We have 2 sites. I, dev, set the https system for one in 10 minutes. The sys admin has been working on it for two hours already and he doesn't want help2
-
Working as sole dev and learning everything on the fly, including "proper" ways to write code. Now that I work in a team, I can see that I'm at least adequate at my job.
-
Ive been working with APIs in web dev for a couple of months now and now I think Im ready to make my own. However, im not really what what I should make an API for. Any ideas?9
-
Ask for the dev server to work on an issue, no one says anything about people having a working session in a few minutes that needs to have what I am working on up and running after saying I could have it.
-
Deploys to Production.
Runtime error.
Open Development server and run in Production setting.
Still runtime error.
Fixes Error.
Error fixed on development.
while (hoursWasted < 3) {
Deploy.
Not working on Prod.
Try other fix.
Still not working, but works perfectly in dev machine.
What the fuck
}
Rage
Go take a walk
Realized I might have deployed to the wrong server
Glanced at deployment path
Realized it's at the wrong server
Reconfigure and Deploy
It works.
Fuck.1 -
So, I had a friendly debate with my senior dev today working over this feature.
What do you say is the best approach?
1. Optimize at the time of building the feature.
2. Do the feature work, optimize all at once. (let's say on a time cycle).5 -
!Rant
I am dev working on data warehousing. Want to switch to autonomous vehicle industry as a vision engineer.
How to start ?
PS: I did projects on CV during my BE days(2016) and won a gold medal in that. -
I've been working on an ERP system these days. Learned how to properly use AJAX and JS. Also, my code is so much organized now, I can really say I'm a better dev now than I was before and this particular project is making me give my everything everyday.
-
!dev
Seems like working in a start up is more tougher than i thought it will be.
Damn it's is taking a lot to keep up now a days.
Need advice to balance out thing.
Before this startup thing I was a freelance developer.1 -
waste a few hours trying to debug shit im working on a feature branch, only to check main branch and it turns out somebody else broke main but the dev environment i'm piggy backing on using is cutting edge
i now miss having a separate individual dev environment to use, but i suppose id lose on some perks probably -
I took an intro to web dev class for credits at my college, seeing as to how I was just short enough credits to graduate...
Currently working as a web developer, gonna be really funny writing unstyled static HTML on tests -
The pomodoro technique and some nice music usually helps me get through dev days. Since I'm pacing myself working on small tasks at a time it doesn't feel like I've spent the entire day coding
-
Trying not to end it all at the thought of a whole game dev team working through perforce. Incoming "oops I checked out the whole thing"
-
Updated to Xcode 11.4, now git doesn't work and I need to download 1GB of Dev tools to get it working.
Xcode alone is 8GB wtf is included there if I still need to download more tools?1 -
Couple of new colleages started last year.
Working with the new Full stack dev: Your WP site is slow? Try this new shiny CMS and just start all over!
Working with the new designer:
Can you send me the assets? Can you send me the assets? Can you also send me asset A? Can you also send me asset B?
Working with the new project manager:
So is it correct that i’m planned in for five projects today?! -
If you like developing apps, then it may be a nice idea to work as a developer. In my case, developing was my hobby while I was in school. And after school, I started working as a dev.
-
Does no one check the dev console before comming to you about site code not working?
It says it right there!
You can't load a src with http while the site is https.