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Got the best cake for my 30th birthday. Only if my wife understood what language I program with. I still love her though!
30 -
If you are using a FREE software and you don’t like it
You have 3 options:
- Stop using it,
- create your own,
- or simply, SHUT THE FUCK UP
You get the right to complain about what I build IF AND ONLY IF you paid for it.
Hope this is clear!!!21 -
So @Linux suggested to make a face revealing rant!
This is the face behind @linuxxx! post yours BUT only if you're comfortable with it :).
403 -
Our programming teacher showed us some parts if his code the other day. When I asked him why he got an empty if-block in there he responded with "cause I only need the else-block"13
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If only more manager would think like this! Constant interruptions are poison to the performance of any dev team.
4 -
The only one rule that governs the entire programmers world: If I work as you want, I'll choose the price. If you choose the price, I'll work as I want.12
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I don't understand the phrase "once in a while".
If you execute something only “once“ then why you keep it in a “while“?10 -
If you’re having SQL injection problems, I feel bad for you son, I got 99 tables but… fffffuck. Now i only have one ☹️4
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Is it just me or am I the only one who gets pissed if someone checks the expected result of a variable first?
For example:
if(true === $var)
Instead of:
if($var === true)
19 -
I’m the tech support of my family and I’m proud! 😎
I only hate it if other people treat me like their personal tech support9 -
I like how @dfox listens to suggestions and updates the app quickly.
If only our 'agile' team completed even a single task successfully without chaos.5 -
Became 30 yesterday.
If I were to die by 60, I'm at the halfway point.
If I were to die by 50, I have spent about two thirds of my life.
If I were to die by 40, well only left a decade left.
Sigh.12 -
I always use brackets for clarity even if there is only one statement inside them
if (boolean){
function ();
}
Cus it's so much easier to read, and if I need to add statements after the if I don't need to remember to add brackets. Plus the else may need brackets and an if with no brackets but an else with brackets looks awful.14 -
After continuously trying to approve my Unity app on app store. I was finally able to do it in just 6 months. Thanks to the 'robust and fast' process of Apple.
If only Android could learn from from them. They took only an hour.4 -
Not entirely dev related.
Just wondering if I'm the only one on here who actually EATS coffee beans regularly?
😐43 -
What’s wrong with me?... Found myself spreading my finger and thumb on some food packaging cooking instructions hoping to zoom in and read it.5
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If your only experience is Uni, don't put skills down as 'Advanced' on your damn CV
Lower expectations, deliver results -
I only have one rule when it comes to stickers on laptop:
Do I reguraly use the software on the sticker? - If yes, apply to PC6 -
Just got myself one of these! Hope it holds up to its predecessor's reputation.
Now only if I could find that annoying dog...
2 -
no matter how big shot programmer you are, you 90% time you will only code
if(condition)
{
// do something
}
else
{
// do something else
}8 -
All these worst password rants.. If only people realized that making it a passPRASE would be sufficient.
3 -
dear boss,
I can't work if you're calling me every 5 minutes to check on my progress. You're only slowing us down. I suggest you resign.4 -
Am I the only one here who's never been asked if they can "hack" someone's Facebook/Twitter/MySpace/etc?11
-
Someone asked me what a full stack dev is... I replied:
"A highly sought after programmer with the world of opportunities and no time to pursue them."
I think I nailed it.3 -
Realising if you'd only studied a degree in computing, you would be useless in the real world as a developer6
-
Got devRantron up and running and it's already found a place next to my editor :D
Now if only image uploads were working...
6 -
You know what drives me crazy.. seen this inside code of "senior devs"
If(something() == true){
// do something
}
Dude!!! The if only happens if its true!
Code this..
If(something()){
// do something
}
OHHH but if i say something I GET IN TROUBLE.4 -
Who says all bugs are bad? Vending machine at work only charges you a dollar regardless what drink you buy if you use android pay.1
-
If only I had enough freelance work to quit my job and dictate my own hours. working hours would be 18:00 to 5:00.1
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"People are very attached to the idea that there’s one right way, one right tool, or one right framework. If only."
-- John Arundel3 -
I would say that devRant is only GDPR compliant if they explicitly mention that it's extremely addictive!
5 -
Serious considering wiping the Windows 10 partition on my computer.
Only thing keeping me from doing it is the Adobe Suite. Damn it.
If only they made it for Linux, life would be such a blessing.
P.S. : GIMP is not a replacement.16 -
Just found out that Windows has a built in Code Editor. Saves your ass if the only alternative is Notepad!
8 -
Being the only tech savvy person in class can be the worst. If someone gets hacked they all blame you...6
-
I've been cooking for 4 hours straight, will be eating for a whole week.
If only freelancing worked like that... -
Perfect view for a peaceful day of coding. But internet sucks here though. If only i can put up my office here.. 😁
1 -
Email from a client today: The programmers just need to add an "if/then" code that IF ... BUT NOT ... THEN ... ONLY ... AND ...
God help us if they discover while5 -
If I had a company. I would only accept code for application. Grades, gender, age... i couldn't care less7
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Tried both vscode and atom. However, keep coming back to Sublime Text, now only if they provided completion as good as IntelliJ, they would beat everyone12
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@dfox
Only 2 rants an hour.
Ok
How about the ability to save and manually post later feature?
I had an idea for a rant. It was gold i tells ya... if only I could remember what it was. 😥8 -
You're a great coder only if you can deliberately write bad code that works but no one can understand.
-
Don't tell me I'm the only one who searched if there's any direct option to use Assembly in Python as it is in C.
2 -
I always wonder what could be achieved if I only worked with half the intensity I have during the final weeks of a semester.3
-
only if students would write proper answers in their answer sheet, that would be great. FFS one of them wrote HTML - HyperText Transfer Protocol.6
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An update of the application is available - would you like to update now?
..what's the point of asking if there's only "yes" button?1 -
If only it were that easy...
...
display: flex;
align-items: center;
justify-content: center;
Done!
😁
1 -
Ahh if only this were true... (The Google part)
Nice day tho... Next time I need to remember to bring my selfie stick...
3 -
alias break-ubuntu="do-release-upgrade"
# Only works if new distro is available, otherwise you have to find another way to break ubuntu -
"If you run printf(“hello world”);, it will print “hello world” every time. But if you call a Windows API, God only knows what will happen."
3 -
If you woke up tomorrow and it was the year 2000, but you only remembered tech stuff from the future. What would you do?11
-
Me - If only there where more people like this in the world, surely world Peace would be achieved.
Friend - maybe, but don't call me sherley.
-
Sleepless night are often the start of great idea's, if only i could remember them the next day after finally falling asleep
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Comment a 1 if you’re a web dev.
Comment a 2 if you’re a game dev.
Comment a 3 if you’re a data scientist.
Comment a 4 if you’re in cyber security.
Comment a 5 if you’re in IT.
Comment a 6 if you don’t fit any of the above categories and you code only in PHP and refuse to learn any other language because you think PHP is the future.50 -
Visual Studio 2017 (RTW)....
Hmmm..
You are not there yet, but I trust you.
If anybody can be best (among IDEs), it can only be you.
9 -
Those poor people in china only use iPhones, I am serious. Android does not exist as Google is banned from China. If they only knew the taste of a little freedom..6
-
If I delete a rant and the lost ++ would get me under 1000++, would I lose my already equipped 1000+ only items?7
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I have so much learning and projects I'm really excited to start. Now if only I can find the time for it.. 😓2
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If wannacry only attacked the win10 which were not updated, what happens when you run a Linux VM inside that ?
Will it get infected as well ?8 -
Am I the only one thinking devRant would be better if you could not post pictures.
We would not have all these repost memes...7 -
tech debt is a b!+ch you can only pay if your client somehow approves the budget for something they will never notice.6
-
i don't understand girls. they just don't make any sense. if only they behave like my IDE.
My IDE :
1 -
8 month with Trisquel only. I must say that it is a great distro!
If you want freedom combined with stability - Trisquel is your choice.3 -
The feel when you just finish coding for so long time.
So fcking great
Only if my laptop didn't broke before I press save4 -
If only the devRant store was to have a gift to user feature where a good samaritan could purchase some swag for their fellow ranters. #justathought1
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What would you do, if the project manager was constantly verbally attacking you for no apparent reason?
Wong answers only.6 -
docker service scale serviceID=5
If only scaling my bank balance were as simple as docker swarm scaling !1 -
Why, for the love of God, is the only user on the computer an administrator?! WTH Windows!! Why wouldn't I want full control over my computer if I AM THE ONLY ONE USING IT 😡😠5
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Unpopular opinion: JS isnt that bad (given you use ES6+). Only node needs to die, and if possible please yesterday.11
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I just solved (high level with a bit of POC) a problem that has been an issue for my team for over a year...
Not sure how I should feel...2 -
Recieved my free stickers and paid for them on the same day!! 😁😁
If only there was an option to toggle the show-offy badge...
1 -
Not sure if am the only one that have the feeling of being cut by a sharp Microsoft's "border-radius: 0;".
-
Sometimes I write code as If it were poetry. Other times I only try to do not exceed 80 characters per line! 😂😂2
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If I only had a dollar for everyone that comments on my rant, but doesn't +1 it, I'd be one wealthy individual.3
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Ever wondered if there are any Devs on devRant that work at the NSA? Or other shady agencies. Or are they only indexing this network?3
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If someone ask about why i put/create this kind of code. The only answer is "The Aliens told me to do so"
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We came across a bug that only manifested itself in Edge if, and only if, the developer console was closed. Which we only discovered once it went live since during testing we always had the console open to monitor things... D:2
-
// Hairy ass complex logic
if(1 == 2) { ... }
If only the programming language had a built-in syntax for commenting out code, you fucking cumdumpster idiot.1 -
If I had some money to with I'd probably get my own little workshop and tinker with micro controllers, custom keyboards and so on.
if only...5 -
I want a staycation by myself away from all of life problems and the stresses that occur from interacting and having to negotiate with other people4
-
Only if javascript could have milkshakes, which would be it's favourite?
-Yes, you are right!!
If you couldn't get it, why are you even here?2 -
Company mail today:
If only I got paid to point out the ironies, I would live well, very well indeed!
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The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet , keep looking .Don't settle 🙌
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Wouldn't it be awkward as hell if we would all only just rant in our native tongue ... Comment below your workaround, if needed 🤣9
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am I the Only Developer that REALLY HAS BAD TIME MANAGEMENT Skills over long projects like come the fek on brain.
look below only if interested has nothing to do with rant
------------------------------------------->
oh yeah and by the way got a new project out3 -
If only there was a way for the peeps who listed 'new job for 2018' to congregate and motivate each other 🙋4
-
When dfox is the only one who support you <3 I don't know if it's only because he is to kind, but thanks man xP
https://devrant.io/rants/827192/...
Maybe I posted at the bad hour :/
1 -
I know and I understand why people still opt for Windows but if they also try to pirate it, that's the only time to tell them to go get Linux. If they're too cheap to get the Windows license, go Linux.3
-
Gonna miss a deadline. Not sure if the fact that I'm insisting on writing unit tests, or the fact that I wrote only 4, is sadder.
-
https://xkcd.com/1808/
If you take only the 2nd half:
They can delete the space, rly? ALTER TABLE spacetime DROP COLUMN x1, x2, x3 or what? -
PSA: VirtualBox command line setup only works if....
--cableconnected1 on
Why does virtualization replicate these problems... Why?? -
Tried WinUI 3 (successor to UWP if I am not mistaken) and it's only a preview at the moment but god DAMN it is awful.11
-
If you enjoy coding at coffee shops, remember to wear headphones. Not only will it help you focus, it'll also block out John Mayer.1
-
When elements of an union are distinguished by a boolean, VSCode's Typescript plugin can only do type elimination if I branch by "== true" and not if I just branch by the boolean.
This is because Typescript treats booleans as an union of the constants "true" and "false", and compile-time elimination can only be done if I use syntax that makes sense with unions. Logical evaluation, for some reason, doesn't.
The fact that this issue can even appear is deeply concerning.1 -
If there are only three tabs on Google Chrome, how can there be 9 services running on the system?
Any medium can explain?23 -
When the only comments in your team's entire project is for code that doesn't work, as if everyone's backspace key broke simultaneously
-
I just wrote an error handler in php (would trigger only if the user's stupid enough):
if (!$detail_trans && !header_moved) {
die("asshole");
}1 -
I gotta say that I really like Christmas trees if for no other reason than they are nearly the only type that aren’t upside-down.
🎄 -
There are definitely too many Javascript libraries, if only because every name that I want on npm is already taken 😔4
-
spends almost 5 weeks trying to get CI/CD to work with Kubernetes (including installing Kubernetes itself).
Decides that he might go see if Nomad is a better thing for him...
Man, if only I discover stuff sooner...3 -
Seriously going to make submit buttons only work if you double click them. Jokes, I disable after the first click, I disable... 🙄
-
I've taken to only allowing PRs on my code if test coverage only deviates negatively within 1%
You can almost hear the tumbleweed.
But that hasn't been merged in yet -
If you don't have a pet project that brings you money, you're a failure.
This rule only applies to me.5 -
I wonder how much better/worse a news channel would do if they only reported good news locally and globally 24/72
-
Probably a veery long time ago, but being able to use what you use in if(...){} for e.g. booleans like "bool(ean) isX = a == x;".
And than reusing that value in if again and so on.
Even if it sounds trivial, there was a time where it was not and "==" was only associated with "you use that in if/while only" rather than "a == b" returns a bool(ean)/int.
Same goes for other arithmetic operators and && / || ofc.6 -
If only windows had Linux like bash, it would be awesome.
Windows 10 is amazing, yet I miss the beloved Oh My ZSH7 -
Dear devs, what gadgets do you often use that help your daily programming?
Even if you only have m+k, what do you prefer?7 -
How fast do you actually counteract leaked password manages of your private accounts?
Right away? Only if the first signs of it malfunctioning appear?4 -
if you could get instantly proficient in only one programming language ( and instantly suck with other languages), what would that language be?
-
all this fucking cloud sync bullshit on mac, iOS, and windows is driving me nuts... would all be fine if it only would work as expected -.-1
-
Is here anyone who really thinks that there is any benefit of participating in hackathons?
Acc. to me, hackathons doesn't makes a good developer but only a good resume(only if u win them)9 -
Quick question, if anyone knows.
Does Wireguard encrypt traffic end-to-end or only between neighbor peers?1 -
1. Stack Overflow
2. Match in FIFA / few rounds in Tekken
3. Beer / Cigarette break (do it only if nothing really helped) 😁 -
My dreams are getting so weird i'm keeping a dream journal now.
If only I could draw/3D model/remember things a while.1 -
Now the vanilla App.xaml.vb looks sooo weird after using Template10 Bootstrapper for long time! But nice job Template10! If only I can tag Jerry Nixon here...
-
What is your opinion on Quora introducing video only answers ?
anyone used askwhale ? If so whats your feedback ?3 -
What's harder than debugging an uncaught exception in a view
If only debuggers like vs can attach to the server side logic of the views -
Are there any services that will compile your apps for iOS? I mean if you don't have an Apple computer yourself. If I use something like react native I could only compile it for android.6
-
If someone blames a technology, then they are doing it wrong!!!
Its like someone saying "Sex is bad" only because they are doing it wrong!!5 -
The only way I’ll be happy is if every politician’s house is destroyed by a tomahawk missle💣
The only way I’ll be happy is if I live in forest with unlimited Percocets💊
The only way I’ll be happy is if I bathed in a river of chocolate pistachios and wintergreen zyns🍫
The only way I’ll be happy is if Sid the IT guy posts a pic of his Lucious titties😩
The only way I’ll be happy is if I go inside of bill murray freaky Friday style👴🏻
The only way I’ll be happy is if I think God is actually real🙏
The only way I’ll be happy is if I get to wear the skin of my favorite celebrity 😍
The only way I’ll be happy is if I hold hands with Morena Baccarin as I watch the world literally go up in a gigantic fireball 🇺🇸
The only way I’ll be happy is if I take acid and 5 Benadryls and take in my live action horror film that is my life 🎥
The only way I’ll be happy is if I take gas station dick pills and huff gasoline and start as many fights as possible 🤺
Share on bible.com if you agree 😔3 -
would only relatively make my day if i caught them.
itd be one less of them for decent folk to worry about. -
So if only one query on a firestore collection returns 1000 documents, this is considred as 1000 read ?
Or only one ?
Docs say 1000 !
And since the cache os 30min long, if the user came to the same and open it 30sec later, ill be charged for 1000 reads ?
Well well well !2
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