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Search - "it's me"
-
Random Guy: So you wrote all this in Java?
Me: JavaScript
Random Guy: Yea. What i said. It's the same!
Me: *triggered*11 -
Boss: "it's not the same font"
Me: "yes, it is"
Boss: "don't argue with me. It's a different font"
Me: "ok it's a different font" (it's not)
Boss: "change it please"
15 minutes later and I've done nothing at all to it. Boss comes back.
Boss: "see? I knew it was a different font. This looks perfect now. Why were you lying to me before? I don't like you arguing with me"11 -
Client: "Hi, there's a problem with this link"
Me: "How odd, I'll take a look right away"
-- 19 minutes later --
Client: "Has this been fixed?"
Me: "I'm working on it currently"
Client: "OK please let us know when it's done"
Me: "I will do"
-- 2 minutes later --
Client: "Hi, is this done?"
Me: "I've just told you I will let you know as soon as it's done"
-- 5 minutes later --
Client: "Hi, sorry to hassle, but is this done yet?"
Me: *starts twitching*
Me: "I am working on it and I will let you know when it's done"
Client: "OK, well don't worry about it, it doesn't really matter"
Me: *explodes*10 -
Me: I'm really underpaid and you know that. You gotta do something about it.
My Manager: It's on my radar. It's complex. Things like these never move quickly.
*Few weeks later*
My Manager: Hey what's the status on that new POC?
Me: It's on my radar. It's complex. Things like these never move quickly.
*Radio silence in the room*21 -
~Ring ring~
Me: Hello, how can i help you?
User: The system is not working
Me: It's because there is not electricity
User: Oh, thanks
10 seconds later
Me: Hello, how...
User: Hi, it's me again, i checked in the building and there is light in the hallway
Me: It's the emergency lights
User: Oh, thanks5 -
Friend: What's that?
Me: DuckDuckGo. It's my default search engine.
Friend: Try using Google instead, it's better.
Me: But Google spies on you.
Friend: So?
Me: Don't you care about your privacy?
Friend: It's not like they are going to kill me. It doesn't matter.
Me: *mumbles* typical muggle...
I'm surprised that people could care less for their privacy. I would ban all things google, but I need google docs.
Also, my idiotic school requires gmail and google classroom. Oh, and did I forget to mention we have to use chromebooks!97 -
My friend: OMG OMG OMG My laptop is dead!
Me: What do you mean it's dead? It doesn't even turn on?
My friend: Nooo, it does nothing?
Me: Are you sure it's plugged in?
My friend: Yesss
Me: You sure?
My friend: Yess, it's actually plugged into a multiple socket thingy...
Me: And that thing is plugged in to the wall..?
My friend: Well duh!
Me: And did you turn the switch on?
My friend: Of course I....oh, wait!! Never mind!!!!!
Me: >:/5 -
Me at the office, Boss calling me by phone..
Boss: Hi, I need a new Build of XX Android app for another client.. set the base address at x.x.x.x and send me an APK file
Me: OK, I will do it.
Boss: can you do it in 5 minutes?
Me: Sure, it's simple..
Android Studio: You think it's simple !
* Indexing Files
* Sync Project
* Gradle Build
* Indexing....
* Some f* tasks
Oh kill me now !!4 -
BOSS: That icon is not centered, move it slightly to the right
ME: You're wrong, I can garantee you it's centered (it was centered)
BOSS: Well, my eyes are telling me it's not, so move it to the right
ME: (faking increasing margin)
ME: Ok, now it's 10 px to the right, what do you think?
BOSS: it's a great result, now it's perfect! Cant you see the difference?
ME: Absolutely, you do are the real designer here...
BOSS: Ohhh, stop complaining, you'll learn one day...
ME: Yep.18 -
Me : Let's just use CDN.
Former boss (fb) : What's that?
Me : You fetch JS and CSS files online. Faster.
Fb: No! Download it!
Me: Why?
Fb: What if there's no internet?!
Me: ... it's a website...18 -
Boss: "If I double-click this button, the modal it opens flicker once for 0.00001 seconds?!?!?!?"
Me: "Ya... It opens two modals. It doesn't break anything, it looks normal except the flickering"
Boss: "It's no good!"
Me: "I've got a solution; don't fucking double click. It's a fucking website."
Boss: "IT'S NOT A WEBSITE. IT'S A SYSTEM"
Me: "It's a fucking website" *Exits room, trying not to strangle the boss".11 -
Marketing: it's not working...
Me: *fixes bug and pushes changes in less than 5 mins*
Me: Well it's working for me
Marketing: strange... it wasn't working 5 minutes ago...
I love their faces of confusion haha11 -
Her: what app is that?
Me: devRant. It's where devs go to complain about things only we'll understand and just talk nerdy to each other.
Her: So where you and your people go to be yourselves?
Me: Basically, yeah.
Her: I thought that was Twitter.
Me: It was, now it's this.
Her: Then what's Twitter for?
Me: ...news?9 -
!rant
Me and friend1: talking about Linux friend2: "what is this Linux"
Me:"it's an OS"
Friend2:"so it's something like excel and powerpoint."
Unfortunately there wasn't a cliff to jump off in that moment.13 -
Me, in the zone, staring at the code. Co-worker enters.
Co: hey, can you...
Me (not really listening): no.
Co: it's just...
Me: no.
Co: later?
Me: no.
Co: but...
Me: no.
Co: (leaving)13 -
At job interview.
Interviewer: Have you ever thought about why manhole covers are round?
Me: It's to accommodate different body shapes of sewer workers.
Interviewer: Hahah. It's actually so the covers wouldn't fall in.
Me: It used to be like that, but they changed it.
Interviewer: What? Who changed it?
Me: The lizard people!
Interviewer: What?!
Me: * cowers in corner and hisses *7 -
Programming is a bit like a partner or is to me:
It helps me
It annoys me
I love it
I hate it
Drives me insane
Bores me to death
Excites me beyond belief
Makes me feel dumb
Makes me feel clever
Supports me
Confuses me
Some days it's beautiful
Some days it's unattractive
But going to be together for a long time through all the ups and downs.3 -
Friend: "Wow! Is it a Raspberry PI?"
Me: "It's another version called Banana, but yes."
Friend: "I want one too for the games!"
Me: "OK, it's easy. There's a ROM called Retro ..."
Friend stare at me intensively
Me: "Sigh... Ok, I'll setup it for you..."7 -
*Before learning to code*
Me: It's going to be easy. 😎
*After learning to code*
Me: Ahh,What should I name this variable.😟😟6 -
I hate how one of my hobbies can get me tipsy so easily.
It's really hard to combine it with the working life sometimes 😖😩
I just love special beer(s), it's more than just beer for me, it's a hobby!22 -
I've just reached 1000++. It's not much and it's taken me almost 1 year but it's still a pretty nice milestone in my book :)6
-
Classmate: You should use Bootstrap!
Me: Why?
Classmate: It's "the framework" that makes your site responsive.
Me: *a long moment of silence*
Me: *goes home*10 -
My apparently my friend's wife gets suspicious whenever his Snapchat goes off after 10pm, always wants to know who it is.
"It's [algo], it's always him sending me pics of his code late at night. That's is the only person that Snapchat me this late"
And it's true.6 -
Me: takling to a colleague on Skype for business
My 3 year old son: what are you doing?
Me: talking on the phone
Son: that's not a phone
Me: ... That's right, it's called Skype. But its' executable is called lync.exe. It's just trying to pretend to be Skype. Repeat after me: lync
Son: lync
Me: great! Stay away from lync. It's evil!6 -
It's happening... 😂😂😂
Wish me luck.. or roast me
Well it's gonna be dual boot so it's not permanent :P25 -
Boss: How long till it's done?
Me: 1 week
... 1 week later
Boss: How long till it's done?
Me: 1 week
... 1 week later
Boss: How long till it's done?
Me: 1 week
... 10 months later
Boss: It's almost Christmas
Me: 1 week10 -
So I got terminal Linux in school right now. People said that it's so hard, but guess what? Surprisingly it's even easier for me than Windows CMD!7
-
After pissing me off for month or so with it's stupid bsods I've decided it's time to move on. Fuck windows.7
-
Client: I forgot what my user ID is to log into the system
Me: It's just your employee ID number
Client: All caps?
Me:
Me: ...
Me: Yes10 -
High school teacher: if your mind it's in the cloud, you'll never accomplish anything.
Present me: :/2 -
me in life: if its too delicious so its unhealthy.
me on code: if it's too easy so it's probably wrong3 -
Week 66 has taught me that I must actually be quite privileged!
I can't recall any bad advice given to me. It's either been good, or I completely forgot about it.
Or on the other hand, it's all been bad advice and I'm a rubbish developer...3 -
Me : I'm a software developer.
Neighbor : Hey could you fix my PC it's not starting.
Me : *goes*
*Finds monitor cable disconnected*
*Facepalm level==69*9 -
Met a girl on internet ( because I don't have a real life )
She: So what are you studying?
Me: Currently learning about Deep Learning but I also do freelancing in website development to pay my bills.
She: Okay so tell me what is a COMPUTER
Me: ....
She: ......
Me: umm... it's a... mmm.... actually it's a..... basically a.....
(thinking really hard)
*30 seconds later*
Me: It's an electronic machine
She: seriously? I expected much better from you
Me: I'm sorry!27 -
Me: "I really love cooking, it's my hobby"
They: "Would you cook for fifty people, sometimes"
Me:"... maybee"
*hired*3 -
~ Freelancer.com Week #1 ~
Project: I need someone to debug an application's code and review it. Budget 30 bucks.
Bid: I am an experienced developer I can probably review it in an hour.
client: Hi, need you to check if app is contains virus [link to scam website]
me: sure, download supposed "social Bitcoin miner" and run some AV tests...8+ positive flags for a Trojan virus.
>Me: It's a Trojan virus mate it's not legitimate😟
>Client: Can you remove the Trojan virus so that the legit not stays?
Me: Umm there is no bot mate it's just a virus 😕 I wouldn't open it outside a sandbox
Client: But here it says Bitcoin faucet bot [links shitty how-to youtube video]
Me: 😒 it's not real dude you are about to get scammed, I can test it in a VM if you. . .
Client: I opened it already, it's working
Me: 😮 r u sure?
Client: yes, can you install VM for further testing?
Me: sure, in your computer?
Client: yes
Me: just download the windows image and text me when it's done
Client: My disc is full! Only 3 gb left
Me: 😑 call me when you clean it
Client: [ offline ]5 -
Recruiter: What is Go?
Me: It's a newish programming language developed by some really cool guys at Google with C-like syntax and great concurrency support.
Recruiter: So it's like Google's version of RESTful?
Me: Umm…8 -
This will always hold a special place in my heart.. Makes me so nostalgic every time. It's what got me into computers8
-
Me: Hey, I need to know when the user double clicked this.
B: It's easy, just put a try catch with DoubleClickException
Me: ...
B: ...
Me: and how about right click?
B: RightClickExce...
Me: Ok. I'm out5 -
GF: Honey... What is that thing called... It's like a neverending if statement...
Me: ... A while loop?
GF: YEAH!! It's a while loop in the brain!2 -
Once a CEO is 24*7 a CEO. For me it's Chief Experiment Officer
And only dreamers can have that title. One who dreams at night and work it out the following day.
Having a startup is much more than just having an idea
It's about revenue,
It's about value,
It's about team,
It's about impact,
It's about growth,
It's about compliance,
It's about being finance, marketing, HR and tech expert at the same time.
It's about respect the supporters,
At the end it's about the money you earn as an individual.
For playing all the above roles, you need to dream real big.
To me startup is about falling in love with your work first.
-
By an Indian CEO2 -
/* MacOS source code
Copyright Snapple, Inc
Private and confidential */
void resumeFromSleep() {
if (rand() > RAND_MAX / 2) {
freezeSystem();
} else {
reallyResumeFromSleep();
}
}4 -
if (MONTH === 1 & DAY === 18) {
alert("Bro, it's your birthday");
} else {
alert("Bro, just go away, you're nothing special 😅);
}12 -
A client, who don't know about programming. But only wants to finish the project ASAP
Me - It's complicated to implements this new feature.
Client - It's easy!3 -
Someone talk to me while I am busy.
Him: I think this table is in the wrong place.
Me:... Excuse me, I didn't hear you, what did you say?
Him: it's in the wrong place..
WHAT is in the wrong place motherfucker.. I didn't hear the whole sentence.. what the shit..
Someone else or it's just me?3 -
Java script is like an angry girlfriend who won't tell you what is wrong.
This shit happened today.
Me: somearray.includes[stuff];
JS: I'm alright everything is fine.
Me: no it's not, Clearly the feature is not working.
JS:* silence*
Me: Fine be that way.. * spends lot of time debugging finally finds the issue*...oh shit.
Me: somearray.includes(stuff);
JS: I SAID NO TRAILING SPACE IN END OF THE LINE YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT NO TRAILING FUCKING SPACES AAAAHHHH!!!7 -
Soooo it's the first day of sprint. I have tasks A, B and C.
Here's my manager again telling me:
"It's just A ,why are you taking time."
"It's just B ,why are you taking time."
"It's just C ,why are you taking time."2 -
Customer call.
Customer: what's the status of the software?
Me: it's a bit of wood work.
Customer: wood work?!
Me: yes, I think it would work.
Customer: ...
Me: ...6 -
Me: *finds bug*
Me: *starts working on a fix*
*4 hours later*
Me: "It's a total whack job but at least the bug is gone"4 -
I'm going to talk to my supervisor about redoing their code base.
It will take time, it will suck a bit but I think the long term investment in doing this right will be worth it.
Wish me luck in convincing him 😂🤞7 -
!rant
Double tap-like is not working properly on my Oneplus 3T while on list view. I'm wondering if it's just me or if it's a bug in the Android app...18 -
Colleague: Hey! This is not finished!
Me: Did you pull from the repo?
Colleague:
Me:
Colleague: Oh look, it's finished.1 -
I don't know who this "you" guy is on all of these git blames, but he's a real asshole for writing all of these bugs.1
-
Grandma: so how do I scan that thingy in order to comnect to the wifi?
Me: I already told you that's something that you have to do only once. Just turn on wifi and it'll connect automatically
G: But I already turned it on and it's not connecting. Now tell me how to scan that again
Me: Are you sure that you did?
G: Yes
*Checks*
Me: It's disabled...
*enables wifi*
G: Oh, thanks, it's working now.
Literally every time she wants her phone to connect to the wifi.2 -
(developer thing)
I am trying to build code from the last 4 or 4:30 hours at office and she message me
She : it's urgent.. call me
Me : me();
(THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID 🙄)4 -
My friend ask me what this method do?
Me : It's self explaning method bro ;)
Friend : doNothing() ???? 🤔🤔4 -
Half the papers on multimodal learning refer to studies on human children learning. Makes me wonder why we never study animals to know how their multimodal learning works so fucking well that some newborns can function straight out of the womb/egg.10
-
Co-worker: Why are you deleting this piece of code?
Me: It's deprecated and it can be made in a better way. Don't worry, I know what I'm doing
Also me: OH SHIT THE ENTIRE PROJECT IT'S RUINED4 -
Someone to me: "Can you optimize this website for Page Speed Insight"
Me: "But it's a fucking Wordpress,.. Go home."5 -
I'm a responsable grown up! *uses a can of glitter hairspray on hair* much adult. Such wow.
Now I'm leaving behind a trail of fabulous. No regrets.
Pfft and my mum keeps on asking when I'm going to have kids...23 -
Unsavy guy calls: hey, my computer don't start.
*some testing over phone
Me: Okey it's probably the psu, give me the model so that I can get you a new one.
Him: okey, let me get a flashlight.
Me: why?
Him: It's dark here. The power is out.
Me: ... -
Me...
The language is fine, it's just me who keeps adding bugs to the programs and forgetting semicolons... -
ChatGPT sucks so much for coding tasks and it's laughable.
Like, it's come to a point where it's unusable for me. At all.
It's like a toddler, anything you tell it, it agrees. Then spits out non-existent functions.
The thing actually slows me down.
And yes, I've tried Claude AI and it's slightly better but in no way, shape or form did it improve my productivity.
Those who claim it made them n times faster were never working on complex tasks to begin with.8 -
Had to integrate legacy code into the new framework.
Me: Where does the virtual sensor come from?
Colleague: It's in the docs.
Me: That step is not in the docs.
Colleague: It is, look into the file $FILE.
Me: Yeah, it's empty :D
Colleague: Nope, it's not.
Me: See, empty (pointing to laptop screen)
Colleague: Why is it empty? (keyboard typing...) Damnit, too many git remotes in my repo :D -
I have that friend who keeps telling me that he doesn't like java just because it's slow! (I hate this excuse).
Friend: look what java did to Android, it's because of java that iOS is faster tham Android.
Me: whaaat!! do you know that Android OS have nothing to do with java? it's C++ you...
Friend: No it's Java, we develop Android apps with java
Me: 🔫31 -
Woah. I just realized that I have 875 followers on GitHub. 😍
I know it's not much compared to the legends, but it's a lot for me.
https://github.com/kbrsh11 -
In `Computer Fundamental` class
friend: What 1 + 1 equal to?
me: two.
friend: ...no, it's equal to ten.
me: oh fuck!2 -
I've been working late nights for so long that falling asleep when it's still dark is an achievement for me. So is waking up when it's still morning.1
-
Friend: PHP is trash.
Me: PHP is the most beautiful thing men created. And you're trash.
Friend: it's function(){
}
Me: it's
function()
{
}18 -
I don't have any 'home setup' (it's just a laptop), so instead I'll post my office one.
It's always a bit messy, so bear wirh me :p -
someone: so what do you do?
me: I'm a software developer
someone: oh, can you design me a logo?
me: no
someone: something simple, I'm sure...
me: NO, IT'S NOT MY F***ING JOB6 -
Hey Guys Look.
It's that asshole who never paid me calling me about his brand new idea.
Should I pick it?8 -
I've just got a new job, and I'm SUPER NERVOUS...
it's everyone like that or just me ?!
It's a back-end JOB !!3 -
"Hey, I've been with the manager on the phone, do you know why we don't have any new open issues on the project? Because the client doesn't have internet anymore"1
-
Other dev: fuck you, your code can't handle null as input
Me: yeah, because it's kotlin. It's like I added @NotNull, so?...
Other dev: fuck kotlin
Me: fuck you and your nullpointers. Don't pass my precious constructor that crap!2 -
Client: "documentation, oh you mean those grey texts the previous code guy wrote on the code files"
Me: I kinda need more than "grey texts on the code files" if you want me to actually fix the system and implement the new specs.
Client: oh you mean the Microsoft asp books
Me: It's a Laravel system sir, it's php not asp.net
Client: what are those?
Me:.................2 -
PM: To achieve this, do A
Me: That's unnecessarily complex, can't we do B
PM: Ooh, so it's too complicated for you?
Me: No, it's complex, it will bottleneck the system
PM: We've done A in 5 different websites, so you should do the same
Me: ......5 -
Oh please it's weekend. Don't call me or message me, especially if it's not urgent 😡 My contract doesn't include selling my soul.3
-
Not been a good day so far:
1. Woke up to my Synology in a 'Volume crashed' state. Tried to contact support via web page; support web page not loading.
2. Ancient software at work stops working. As the last remaining C++ dev, I gotta troubleshoot. Original developer wrote test program...in VB6.
3. Server config file changed, but all the admins swear up and down nobody's made any changes.
4. Client calls account rep and wants to know about our security policies, so he schedules a meeting with me and client and forgets to mention until he's emailing me asking where the hell I am. From the tone of the conversation between the rep and the client, it's clear that somehow I'm to blame for being late.
Sigh.
Well, hey, at least it's Friday, right? Right?1 -
After 4 months of dev, Project went into production
Client: it should work like that.
Me: it's a CR!
Client: No, it's not!
Me: talk to my boss.
...
...
...2 -
It's computer science college, and yet :
Them : ... so thats how my project goes ! it's fun!
Me : whoa that's cool, do you use javascript?
Them : ... umm
Me : ...I suppose??
Them : uh, i use node and bulma actually.
WHAT THE FUCK?11 -
Interviewing candidates for a middle/senior dev position:
Me: Imagine you have this button, but whatever it's doing when you click it, it's taking too long to load. How would you improve the speed performance?
Candidate: Redis!
Me: Okay... but how would you find where the bottleneck is?
C: Redis!
Me: How abo-
C: REDIS!3 -
It's not just the fucking money, it's my fucking time. U wanted Polymer but now React?!! Fuck me sideways!4
-
At Italian lesson: The professor asks me "What is a sentence?" I answer "it's a CharSequence". He looked me very badly
-
*meeting on Monday*
Client: so I've got this project I want you to do, it's simple right?
Me: seems so
Client: so I'll pay you this much because it's so simple
Me: uhhhhhhhh
Underpaying client: I also told my higher ups that you'd be done by Friday you can do that yeah
Me: ..................2 -
Phone interview sprung on me in 2 hours from now. It's in devops. Just got called out of the blue.
Wish me luck4 -
friend: Hey,what's this app, devRant on your phone?
me: well,it's where developers share their views....
friend: oh, it's like facebook for coders?
me: :|5 -
"Hey Bobby, can you do XYZ for me? I can do it myself but it's such a pain in the ass"
So why the fuck would I do it if you can do it yourself? Guess what it's a pain in the ass for me too! And it's not even my problem!2 -
me: Dad I got a job! It's...
dad: great! you can help pay mortgage!
me: oh shit, should have said nothing..1 -
i wonder, does my mom use linux? cuz i can't refuse whatever she wants me to do.
it's like she always 'sudo'-ing me around6 -
And here's that app.css single file that my predecessor left for entire project. It's the second work he left a treat for me.
Kill me please.
Btw the code looks like it's been written by a second grade kid...4 -
When the user complains that our web tool is corrupting and losing data when converting results into excel while he is the one putting more that 40,000 characters into one text box which is way more than what Excel's cell can handle1
-
A: Do you still have that number?
Me: What number?
A: That number written on that paper I see on your desk.
Me: I guess it's on that paper then.
A: Thanks *leaves*
???
It was an email and it's missing the domain...1 -
Me : Hey Azure, I have a problem with "this" blade in Azure portal. It's not working
Azure : Disable your adblock
Me : NO
Waiting next response2 -
Coding has given me a creative outlet. It's filled me with more frustration than anything else I've experienced. It's given me profound joy through successful projects. It's provided me a career which supports my family.
Coding has done a lot for my life... -
How machine learning works
Interviewer: What's your biggest strength?
Me: I'm fast learner.
Interviewer: What's 11 * 11
Me: 65
Interviewer: not even close. It's 121
Me: It's 1213 -
me giving advice to beginners: don't feel bad about your code. as long as it gets the job done, it's good
also me: don't look at my code. it's terrible!10 -
Ok guys. My girlfriend told me to move into her house. I'm scared, I know it's an opportune and good time. But it's a big step for me!6
-
*Developer working from home*
Dev -- Make me some coffee
Wife -- *no response*
Dev -- sudo make me some coffee
Wife -- It's not gonna work on me !!!4 -
The catharsis of deleting code that is difficult to read, clashing with the agony of deleting code that was difficult to write.9
-
It's like I know staying up all night is gonna kill me the next day, and I do it anyways... and now it's the next day. Fml 😫4
-
I'm an android developer. It's Friday evening. Just received a call from my honcho. He asked me to "hack" one website and get all the data from it.
Now I'm downloading PyCharm...
It's not a regular "fucking hell". It's a shit. Period.2 -
It's really funny to me that bitcoin can't be used for transactions anymore because it's way too volatile2
-
Front end: spend 5 hours coding and create a fully functional, beautifully designed Web page
Back end: spend 30 hours coding and get that one widget working... Kind of3 -
Imposter syndrome is such a bitch
It feels so good to finally be able to achieve something without constant self doubt (okay I lied, but atleast I am actually programming)
But fuck me it's hard to keep reminding myself that it's okay, it's fine if it's not perfect, just evaluate all the possible solutions and pick the best one, it's fine9 -
Me: //trying to fix bugs
IntelliJ: hey you have 2 typos
Me: Where? I can't see typos anywhere what the Hell
Me: //looks up and down my classes/interfaces. It's my name
Me:
Me: Well isn't that delightful -
Me: Yea, Linux is great! Screw Windows!
*Touchpad stops working on startup
Me: It's fine, it could happen on Windows...
*Laptop fans start blasting at 100% during class
Me: It's uhh, probably just a simple thing, nothing to worry about....
*Restarts computer after updating. Screen completely black, even after restarting multiple times.
Me: Oh FFS....4 -
Website: what's your address?
Me: It's 192.168.1.7... Oh! Silly me! You meant my public address!! 89...1 -
On call with customer
Cstmr: What version is this?
Me: Can I see the build number plz?
Cstmr: Yeah
Me: *checks against internal doc*
Me: It's version X
Cstmr: Are you sure?
Me: Um...I'm pretty sure
Cstmr: I'm gonna check
Cstmr: *mutes me and spends 10mins finding public version of the doc*
Cstmr: Ah, it's update X
Me: *................* yes2 -
Maybe it's just me, but it seems that bitching about a problem helps me think about the problem in such a way as to help me solve the problem...
...probably just me4 -
Me *looking at the project* : it won't be difficult, it's going to be piece of cake.
Me *really reads more about it* : maybe it's not what I thought
Me *now doubting myself* : Google has all the answers
Me : runs to Google for something as simple as a while loop😩.1 -
I've got Firefox Quantum a couple of days ago now. It's really awesome!
But one thing bothered me...
Today I changed the icon to the old one.
Now it's the Firefox I love, it's perfect!2 -
friend : can you help me modifying my client's website? It's a company profile website so no complicated stuff.
me : let me see...
*it's bulit on opencart*
me : wtf
friend : exactly 😂1 -
Nearing the end of the year, and all I'm thinking is that I'm just making bad decisions left and right. And these are like long term decisions, that don't show results until much later.
It's making me really depressed and it's not good.
There are a bunch of should haves all littered throughout the past 3 months and it's really fucking with me.2 -
Usually what helps me get into the zone is having ambient or chill music playing in the background. After a while it's just me and my code with nothing disturbing me.1
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Client : Make us those light weight version or lite, whatever it's called.
Me : Well... ok.
Client : So... it's gonna be you who will hit the gym or us ? -
Technicalities are the last ditch effort to win an argument for a person who has never been respected or loved by anyone ever. Don't argue with them. Instead, give them a hug. Remember: it's not me vs. you, it's me + you vs. the bad thing.3
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I will do documentation when it's done...
When it's done: can't be asked, I mean who needs documentation xD
Ok maybe some coffee will help me write it lol2 -
It's so cool to see this many computer nerds just like me gathered in one place. I think I'm gonna like college, it's a dream come true.3
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It's part of me, there's nothing special for me known as Dev days. Everyday is Dev day, for me Dev day basically means my life. If you ask for normal day, where I don't have to do something techy, well, then it's a different story.
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It's really getting hard for me learn git and it's working 😞😞. I got some concepts like commiting changes and some other.
But, will anyone please tell me tutorial about learning git. And its working.
Btw I am CS student right now and really wanted to learn about git and it's importantance.9 -
It's ok to deal with PHP.
It's (kinda of) ok to make new stuff with It.
Stop pretending that it's not broken.
(I know php8 blah blah, but let's face it, without a good framework it's unmanteinable)
I dunno, i'm just frustrated by the low salary that PHP give to me.17 -
Client: Excuse me, I know it's your day off, but I need you to fix my website it's urgent!!!
Me thinking: Excuse me while i chop your head off, shit down your neck and feed your remains to the pigs!2 -
Client: I can't use the copy button
Manager: It's data related, other clients can do that
Me: FUCK, it's friday... -
Could be a stupid question, but I'm asking anyway. If I have a Java application, it's legal for me to package dependencies in it's jar, right? (In this case GSON)5
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can someone explain to me why every time I open a rant and see orange bg in the avatar start thinking it's me...even when I know it's not the case... really :D14
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Anyone else trying to crawl back out the rabbit hole that is 3d printing? It's great don't get me wrong but it's so fucking annoying when it goes wrong16
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Type coercion in JavaScript. I appreciate it's trying to help me out, but it'd be cool if it just told me I made a mistake.1
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Finally my laptop is back and it's keyboard problem, thanks for official repair stop. Other two unofficial repair stops told me it's main board problem, FUXK THEM.
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"SEP" is something I hear a lot from people that work under me. Sadly, for me it's never someone else's problem. It's always mine.
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I hate manipulating collections. It's difficult matter for me. Nodes, trees, traversal, efficiency. Argh.14
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anyone else having a project and getting behind schedule and working overtime and still not getting it done?
no? it's okay, i know it's only me so dumb :(6 -
me asking python: is (0.1 + 0.2) == 0.3 ?
python: NO
me: wha.!!
python: Instead, it's 0.30000000000000004
me: what the actual F***!!13 -
boss: ... It's easy for you programmers to find a job, isn't it? (After he told me I was to face the axe.)
me: (WTF?...) -
Right now?
Partial
Because it's given me a measurable performance gain in an app that (with the production database loaded) takes hours to complete it's task. -
Idiot: "You should use this thing for that ! It's way better than your suggestion "
Me: " ok cool can you explain to me why it's better or even what it does for me? "
Idiot: " well .. It's kind of ... Like .. Erm ....google it man"
Me: "face palm" -
Everytime my qa says "it's a bug"
Me: You saint, it's not a bug, it's a feature...
*Awkward silence* -
"This is an easy task, call me when it's done"
5 months later
"well the test of senduser didn't pass"
Me: "this wasn't on the docu"
"oh, let me rewrite it" -
I really like that SO have that documentation section. It's teaching me things about writing documentation that Lord knows University will never teach me. It's great to see how things are done in the industry compared to the ancient practices we're taught.1
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Not sure why it's funny to me to see these kinds of pericles, but... lmao tho'
it's win10 even o.O'4 -
Not sure if it's just me, but it's kinda annoying to hear people say "make a build". Just say "when the code is built" or "when we run the build".1
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Is it just me who finds coding so relaxing? In all the messy crap flying around it's just me and code..my precious!