What a horrible feeling when you pin a shortcut to taskbar then launch it and you find yourself with two icons on the taskbar.

We just spent 30 minutes standing around watching Elon Musk launch his car into orbit.

I love working in IT.

1995: Viruses create funny VGA effect
2000: Viruses send SPAM e-mails
2010: Viruses steal credentials
2016: Viruses launch DDoS attacks
2017: Viruses demand ransom
2018: Viruses mine crypto coins

Listened to the Google product launch yesterday, didn't notice this "feature" until now. Talk about throwing shade.

Me (5 days ago): A major, life-threatening hurricane is coming. I need to prepare. I know you have a need to launch so I will do my best to finish your project.

Client: Ok, stay safe.

Client (today): I know you're not done. You're late actually. To provoke you into further action, we went ahead and announced the launch and people will begin using the website now.

Me (at the store buying food for the next two week): What in the actual ... Here is your code. Finish it yourself. May God have mercy on your cold, dark soul.

OH: “We can just launch it at midnight, the devs can be on-call”

Designer: The design is done and approved by you. Set the launch date. We just need to put some code behind it and the shop project is finished.

After the meeting the programmers heard what the designer said to the customer in the meeting.
Programmer: *facepalm*
PM: *facepalm*

My very first meeting with a new client:

Client: We need to launch in 6 weeks. Do you think you can hit that deadline?

Me: Do you have a spec for what needs to be done?

Client: No we don't.

Me:

Someone please shoot me right now.Or better a blackhole could just collide with earth right now and annihilate everyone and everything!
We are supposed to launch the app this coming Friday and as of Monday this week everything was OK.
Just yesterday this client came up with dozens of changes that demand a major rewrite of the backend.

The thing with this client is that she doesn't realize I deal with the mobile apps and not the APIs.Right now am headed to the management office to explain why the app is not updated after she sent this email today morning.
This is not the first time she has demanded changes a week to the launch and i feel like i should stand up to her but you know, i have bills to pay.

NSA's reaction on iPhone X launch 😂😂

C : Hi, I will send you the minor fixes with new images soon. Can you update for me?

Me : Yes sure.

C : We would also like to launch the website tomorrow.

Me : Oh cool. Then I'll connect it to the live domain after the updates.

C : My boss also likes to press a button and launch the website....

Me : ... umm ...

"The client wants th..."
FUCK THE CLIENT!FUCK THAT MORON!
YOU CAN'T BE MAKING CHANGES 1 DAY TO LAUNCH! FUCK THIS!

I know I have ranted here before about how I hate this client and the changes they are always making, but today the app was officially launched with a big media presence! I have never felt such kind of joy as a dev before!

(after 1 month working on native android app).
Me: The android app is now ready.

Boss: okay great... Can we have the ios one ready for launch tomorrow.

Me: No it will take some time.
Boss: why you already have the Code can't you just make an ios app out of it... Like copy and paste

Me:😡😡🆘

Today is the day I launch on of the biggest projects I worked on.

AND I FUCKING FORGOT TO CODE THE 404 PAGE

True Af😂

I might start naming our release tags as Kraken-x.x
That way on launch day I can legit order the team to RELEASE THE KRAKEN.

What even is this?

They are very "proud" to launch this app..

I thought this launch (security/privacy blog) would go smooth:
- analytics fell, except for one thing, apart for yet unknown reasons
- MySQL came with a very weird error which took me like half an hour of research before I hacked my way past it.
- the firewall started to fuck around for no reason, works now though.

Nginx worked without issues though, as well as NetData 😅

Yeah, didn't go as planned :P

When you work your ass off to meet the deadline and once you miraculously make it, the client decides to wait with the launch for a few more weeks.

- locked my PC and went to launch
- after 30 minutes, enter my password
* all apps and windows are gone and the it's like a new startup of the windows
* notification: windows is up to date now

-- oh go to hell now

"Unless it's the big red button with launch codes, there are no buttons you can press that I can't unpress"
Translation: you have to TRY to mess up so bad it's beyond repair.

Apple finally approved app for the store! (we have like 10 hours left before launch) phew!

Almost smashed my keyboard out of anger when my app was taking over 30 mins to launch ,only to realize I had forgot to disable a breakpoint.

Smh.Feeling stupid.

While live streaming Google pixel launch, every time the guy on stage say Ok Google my phone triggered it 😁😁😁

Today - after a successful launch of my own GitLab-Server - I finished my other project!

It's a Resouce Panel for my Homeserver to check it's stats like:

- CPU usage
- RAM usage
- Network Traffic
- Disk Space

It works like a charm and only need php <3

If you guys want a download link, I'll send one in :)

!RANT
Me and My designer friend created a chrome extension, He designed the UI in like 10Mins and It took me 4 sleepless weekends to make it to v0.1 launch. It's hurts when people only say *pleasant UI, loving it* and all shit. 😒 I'm totally shroooved 😷

*launch software*
> goes tits up with no info
*restart machine, launch software*
> still goes tits up
*su to the user it runs as and run it manually because fuck you shitstaind*
> still goes tits up
*launch with debug logs enabled*
> suddenly works

What is this black magic?!

Work at a media company that reports political news. The government tries to block, launch DDoS attacks, and send a group of thugs to protest outside the office. How to migrate to Canada again?

wE oNlY uSe 10% oF bRaIn pOwEr
yeah, no shit, now go to your computer and launch 400 chrome tabs. Congrats, now you're using 100% of your computer performance. Does it work well now? Quick and snappy innit?

fucking muppets.

Broken app is broken again. This app is broken so often and so hard, I'm struggling to give a damn.

These fuckers need to take their shitty project, code and managers especially, and launch them into Mars

They blame us and everyone else for their shit and I'm done with it. I need to sleep and not have these fools call me at all fucking hours.

How's the site launch going? Fucking started drinking scotch at 11:15am. That's how it's going.

Notepad++ is best. It take seconds to launch and provide color schemes for every language and its indentation is really good.

Remember when I said don't launch on a Friday?

Coming into work on Monday with a broken site is exactly why we don't do that...

Now I get to deal with fixing this issue while also dealing with complaints from managers who act like I didn't warn them.

Inspiration for alcoholism.

Launch that project as is... There is always room for improvement.

1970..................................................2020

Today's launch day. Wish us good luck...

I've programmed my pi to launch fireworks whenever a post of mine reaches 150 ++'s
Now I need some testers

Bout to loose my shit. Fucking hate it when clients push and push to launch the system as urgently as possible. Say they have run through the test version and understand what they are getting and sign it all off. Then come back 2am the day after launch and bitch and moan cause its missing features they thought where there when they weren't part of the original planning and always use the excuse "i have just bought a bunch of marketing, your loosing me money" or "I have an important even with important people that need this tomorrow" and try make it your fucking problem.
Firstly, fuck you
Secondaly, fuck you.
I cant even comprehend your lack of logic.

So it's 2 weeks past launch day... And we are still not close to launching.

Sigh...

>Download last version of software, a couple hundred megabytes
>Launch software
>Software immediately asks to download a couple hundred megabytes of updates
>mfw pic related

Quick reply to mentions will be in devRantron @ launch (this week if everything goes right) 🎉

Fuck yeah!!! After over a month of being stuck without a phone, the funds have finally been released to buy a new one. It'll be the OnePlus 6T. Kernel source available on launch, wicked specs that rival PC's - 8GB of LPDDR4 RAM, a quarter TB of storage... Fuck yeah!!!! Never settle indeed!!! :D

Just attended Azure DevOps Launch here in Philippines

I really hate designers who get worked up over a few pixels difference between their mockup and the end result.

I really, really, really, really, thoroughly despise designers who get worked up over a few pixels when they keep changing the mockup without notifying me, when we're already *weeks* past our intended launch date.

Shove those pixels up your ass, you fucking fuck

You know you've been a dev for to long when a program fails to launch and you instinctively open the log files.

I fucking love how the Cyberpunk 2077 disaster goes down... and then, silently, Kerbal Space Program 2 pushes their launch date back again by another year.

Lol, is someone a little afraid? Take your time, boys.

GUESS WHO JUST BURNT OUT?

With 3 weeks to go to launch I've just been booked off for a week for chronic stress and exhaustion.

No laptop for a week.

I swear macOS Sierra is worse than Windows Vista, I need to type my password like 10 times to install and launch XCode...

Finally launched the product I was working on :D

what was the first Rant in devrant? 🤔
I mean, how the first user(s) was convinced to use devrant if he opens it and finds the timeline empty?

Why Apple still is able to pull through an amazing launch is because they never compared with other companies!
"...first time ever in an iPhone"

Wish me luck. I HAVE to launch 10 websites (yes, ten) this week and half if not all of the clients don't know their DNS accounts or log ins. I foresee a lot of long nights in my near future. Story of our life, right?

Previous Job I had finished a website for a client but the launch date was delayed (the logo was being redesigned) and when the client was ready to launch I was on holiday

Before I went I sent the files to my colleague and asked him to do the launch but spelt his email wrong

Never checked my emails on holiday so the client had to wait 2 weeks for his website to launch

Watching the Parker Solar Probe launch, seems to have been delayed a couple of minutes.

I have my name and my sons name on it, kinda cool.

Fuck EA and its fucking launcher. Your broken piece of shit software doesn't even launch. I even tried reinstalling but that garbage won't launch. Fuck you EA and all of your bad practises. Wrap that launcher and shove it to your ass.

"The new platform is launching tomorrow. Get the most perfect first time user experience and registration flow. Don't leave until it's done."
Exactly one year later: "We are finally about to launch the new platform"

Just started the TV show "sillicon valley", it's pretty good and funny, if you want something to watch about programmers that launch their startup

Holy shit. I'm actually vibrating after watching the FH launch. Seeing the two falcon 9s landing at the same time looks straight out of a sci-fi movie :P

Also, I wonder what happened to the core 🤔

It's sad. When developers create the application and ONLY know how to lunch it by clicking that green button in the IDE, having no clue how to package and launch it properly...

it makes me sad.

Now I'm supposed to dockerize an application no one knows how to launch outside the IDE.

Holding off the website launch date because IE 8 isn't compatible! Can't wait for IE to be discontinued!

The debugging loop for Minecraft Spigot plugins on a 4GB RAM laptop:
1. Start Eclipse - 1'
2. Edit code.
3. Build plugins - 2'
4. Close Eclipse to make RAM room for Minecraft.
5. Upload plugins to server with FTP - 1'
6. Start server and launch Minecraft - 2'
7. Enter the server.
8. Find bugs.
9. Stop the server, close Minecraft.
[Go back to 1.]

The new iPhone will be out soon. For those who want to know what new features will be coming with it: have a look at last generation android phones.

Confession: I'm launching a major project for a client this time next week. It's some of the worst code I've ever written in my entire life. It's beyond awful, but I have no choice. It's sure going to be fun fixing it for the next 2 weeks post launch.

I was just about to post on here asking for a final round of beta testers for my web app before launch, and just before I hit “post” I thought of a massive issue.

FUCKING CUNTSTICK

Wombat is days away before launching his side project. It is a platform to sell website components for devs and designers.

I am very nervous about it. 😬😬😬

When I launch my startup, I'm gonna insert all kinds of very stupid and weird error messages in place of the actual errors just so the people can have a chuckle instead of being annoyed
maybe someone's gonna post it on reddit or something, I don't mind, that's actually a good thing

The entire modern gaming ecosystem is a scam.

I added The Crew: Motorfest trial version to my library for free.

Click on Install and it downloads 43 GB of data.
Now it's time to launch.
Click on launch and Ubisoft Connect takes over and it starts downloading another 43 GB??????

WTF ??

If I can't even get the trial version of a game without nearly wanting to kill myself, how does the company expect me to pay full price for it?

Piracy FTW. Fuck all the companies.

One week before launch.

Boss: "the app is very broken and acting weird. please help!"

An icon wasn't showing...

(!rant && !dev && awesome == true)

So for the space fanatics here who didn't knew. SpaceX will launch their falcon heavy rocket today Can't wait 😊

I don't know if it's the craziest, but once we had an issue with a new release that caused a few forms inside the application to launch with a different scale, resulting very small on 4K monitors.
It turned out the issues were caused by importing "System.Windows" in a new module.

Dragon on falcon 9. First re-use of a commercial orbit-class space-craft!

Launched successfully
*giggles*

The intense moment when there are thousands of people eager to use a new website you developed and there are still bugs and rough edges but the launch time is in 2hrs.
Needless to say I'm pretty nervous.

When you launch a project just before you take your vacation..

spotted a huge bug 2 days before launch. My boss was panicking and he asked. "how long more you need?!" I look at him and almost said "Don't rush art" then I swallow my saliva and said "give me 2 hours" he said ok hurry up.

yea 2 hours after i find out what went wrong

So you warn the agency that the client is going to eat into the Dev time with their constant design change requests. Warned them repeatedly for a good month, I should add, asking them to better manage the client's expectations and push back for a later launch date. Come time for development and they act all surprised that we can't build the entire site, that we outlined in the timeline will take 4 to 5 weeks of Dev time, in less than 2 weeks!! ... It gets worse! They say the client is happy to compromise as long as we launch "something" by this date. We list out what can be done, and the fact that there's no time for the client to do QC and we won't be able to do a full QA phase on the site until after launch and only when we finalise all the features. Agency says client agrees and within 3 days into development, they want to QC the site and add more features....... still wanting all this in 2 weeks. This site has now been in development for 3 months.

The client said they don't want the old news to be imported to the new website.

After launch the client said that the news has not been imported over to the new website and they won't pay until everything is completed.

So am busy copying and pasting contents and images.

I want to fuck myself!

I was helping a client launch a new website. We met in a restaurant to do the final launch work. I mentioned I use VPN software to protect my computer on public WiFI and taught him what it means. He said it sounds hackerish and untrustworthy and I had a hard time explaining how it’s actually a countermeasure to hackers.

The next day he calls and says his cell phone is acting up and wants to know what my VPN software might have done to cause that.

How do some people get dressed in the morning?

I didn't write 1064 lines of tests so that you launch the script like a monkey without checking anything beforehand and cry because it throws tons of erros.

Teammember left. I did his three tickets yesterday. Before that I created and applied new rescue procedure for broken deploys on production and deployed the app manually. Took me about 6 hours to do this right, find the cause, and solve it, and document what I did. After that my teamleader bought me a launch :)
It wasn't his, my former teammate responsibility to bring back prd to life, it was me being good and engaged employee. His tickets, on the other hand, were his duties. Took me one hour to code them. He was working on them for two weeks. I can't wait for the performance review, im definitely going to ask for a nice rise :)

"curl : The response content cannot be parsed because the Internet Explorer engine is not available, or Internet Explorer's first-launch configuration is not complete. Specify the UseBasicParsing parameter and try again."

Why the flying fuck do i have to configure some BS in internet explorer to use curl in Powershell? I thought IE was finaly dying, but nope!

Ticket: We were able to get the site launch, but we lost some functionality on x. Can you fix ASAP?

Not a single url, didn't even know they were going to launch, or where. There must be an achievement for this. 🤡

Does Devrant have a public API?
I'm trying to write an extension for my Vscode so I can read posts while working without having to launch the mobile app.

How bout instead of "Disrupting space-time continuum" or "Moving satellites into position" .. you just launch your crappy app.

Overhearing your boss pitch the application you're currently working on to a client as an effort to save them from leaving, only to also hear him list features that were never discussed as part of the application launch.

When you get a project ready for launch and the client finds a huge error that has to be fixed first, except it's not a huge error, it's something they requested two months ago and forgot about.

>site is production ready
>client requests new feature by end of week
>add feature and then site breaks on last day of week
>client freaks out even though we warned this is what happens when you add new features DURING LAUNCH WEEK

You know a website launch is going to go smoothly when:
1) it survives multiple reviews,
2) it's packaged up and sent to the client,
3) client tells you there's incorrect info,
4) incorrect info matches current site, and
5) client doesn't provide the correct info.

😑

about to hire a senior Android consultant, there is this consultant salesman again trying to sell us one guy who has worked one month with an app that "failed to launch"

Saturday night coding to make a deadline for a Wordpress website that needs to launch on monday...

I hate Wordpress!!!! Did I ever mention it?

Ok, now back to work!

When did devrant launch?

A senior member of the Business just came to my desk:

“Hey are we still cool to launch that thing in Monday?”

Me - “eeehhhhhh”

The feeling of sick in my stomach has not yet passed.

Those who code their software with no standard are those people who once attempt to launch themselves to Mars with a catapult.

1. Get some money with little contracts got by my school
2. Pay fucking good holidays with my gf
3. Finish my big school project that will validate almost two years
4. Launch my startup

Was at a pretty big launch party today. Everyone with developer badges on dance floor had a backpack on 🤔

Launching a site is quite hard. Launching a community site when you don't have the community yet is really hard. Gosh...

cheers to the cultured ones here

There once was a beautiful initiative to put ballistic missile launch codes into a small capsule and hide it near some person’s heart.

This person would give consent to become the president’s personal assistant and will be paid indefinitely just to be around president all the time.

This way, if the president wants to launch missiles, they first needs to kill one person with their own hands before killing millions.

1 - Stop working from home and start my own office
2 - Get more clients as a consultant/software house
4 - Launch SASS products overseas to get more 5x income
5 - 6 travel at least 3 times to other states

999 dollars = 835,20 euro
Launch price of iPhone X, 1179,00 euros
Maybe it's because Apple pays too much revenue tax in EU , oh, wait...

I didn't even realise .NET 7 was released YESTERDAY until a startup wizard pre-selected that instead of .NET 6 LTS
It was surprisingly a quiet launch .-.
Or I was too busy to notice -.-

Is it just me, or are the media / journalists once again putting a stupidly unfair pessimistic spin on that SpaceX launch?

"SpaceX rocket launches but explodes shortly into flight"
"Musk's SpaceX big rocket explodes on test flight"
"SpaceX rocket explosion: None injured or killed"

They've said time and time again, it's the first test of a massively complex rocket that's bigger than anything that's ever gone before it, and success is just defined as "getting off the launch pad" and collecting data. They did that and then some.

But instead of spreading excitement about the data, the fact it launched, that it's a world first, etc. - it's all doom and gloom, implying that the whole thing was a failure and people could have died 🙄

And people wonder why I have a low opinion of journalists.

I've used a Mac for 2 months and already love it. I've been a Windows user for like 10+ years but holy fuck, Windows is a giant pile of flaming fucking trash. Looking back, I don't even know why I continued to use it after the launch of that absolutely abysmal "OS" they called Windows 8.

Been watching NerdCubed for years. Finally got to meet him and Rebecca at the launch of his first book woo.

Everyday:
Colleagues: I hate when the client wants to make last minute design changes the day we are supposed to launch when they have had MONTHS to bring them up..

Today:
Me: we are supposed to launch our site today (our own agency site that we have been working on and reviewing as a group for about a year), so please take some time to go through and make sure there are no GRAMMATICAL errors.
Colleagues: *send huge lists of minor design changes that are CRITICAL*

I’m tired of being put in positions where design gives me a rough mock-up a week (or less) before its launch day. It’s frustrating and I’m tired.

Why the fuck these managers can’t understand that you can’t build a full blown system with in a week. After building a demo driven application to show the client you can tell the client we are fucking ready to launch the damn thing . I FUCKING MENTIONED BEFORE GOING TO THE MEETING ITS NOT RELEASE READY GOD DAMN IT.

Now when I say we can’t launch this app we need to fix things . THE FUCKING MANAGER HAS THE GUTS TO SAY “one day is enough to fix the issues right ? Shouldn’t be a big deal for you to fix this” .

Kill me now 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

Anyone noticed new Facebook logo? Relatable to new iphone launch......
Someone changed RGB to CMYK.....
keep going.....

If only this button could make this shitty work week end & launch me in to paradise. I've had it up to here with PMs, clients, sales and stupid people. Any one else? 😖🙋🏼👋🏼

Four and half months,
Hundreds of hundreds PRs and one additional product cluster
By 6 Engineers..
To 500+ micro services
Which has no timezone or currency context,
Created by 250+ engineers,

To launch in a new country...

It didn't make me happy.

But the feedback from customers and drivers is priceless and #heartwhelming

You wanna know how Windows really pisses me off? I press ctrl + win + right arrow to go to workspace X, I launch application X, then I go back to application Y in the previous workspace (workspace Y)

Fucking application X shows up in workspace Y.

WHO THE FUCK IS RESPONS.. nevermind, I need a shower.

Got an email about production launch.

It says that the launch production will done at noon and if you have something to say about it, you should be fast telling them.

The email was sent at 11:59 AM.

Perfect timing

Testing before launch in 5 days... opens site in Safari aka OSX's IE...

Working more than 5 months for our new web site. And considering lots of cool stuff and useful features. Just after the launch one customer called our support to notify that our site has been hacked.

Wombat has his deployment day today! *_*

Wombat is freaking excited!!!

!rant
Launch time wish me luck!

Going through the conversation for xxxxth time with my business partner, why we will not launch a new product on top of pre-made PHP script / plugin.

Just got our company into TDD, and automated QA via CI server & code checks etc, PLEASE stop trying to drag us back into the land of spaghetti code & bug legions in production. That's all thxbye.

There should be a launch button wired to the clients' seats in meetings so you can fire them in to the sun while sitting in front.
I don't get how they can be so dimwitted sometimes...

Why does it seem like every application these days needs to restart after performing any kind of update or installation? It's even more annoying when you just don't restart then launch the application and everything works fine...

Hi DevRanters!
I got this react gig earlier this year, its pay is $280/month ($70/week), its a relatively new startup yet to launch though. i was tasked with building landing page and dashboard for user and admin.
Since the company is about to launch, myself and the ceo had a talk concerning salary and he's proposing a salary lower than the one stated above.
Please for a relatively new startup how much do you think is ideal for salary?
What do I do if we couldn't reach an agreement?
Asking for a friend. Thanks.

Guess what did Apple launch!?
.
.
Expensive book!

What a week!!

Seriously exhausted. Crunch time to launch a brand new service... Pulling all nighters and stress.

Looking forward to having many beers with the boss to celebrate once it's a done and dusted.

the CEO is trying to release a product that has had a total of 1 test user, himself!! 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️

Any ideas to convince him to do something like a slow launch instead of sinking a bunch of money on marketing!?!?
(I'm pretty sure dilbert or xkcd should have something related...)

Who's watchin the JWST launch?

I have made 2 mistakes today.
1. Upgrading from Fedora 23 to 24 on a busy work day - it's taken over 2h now...
2. Trying to switch to a new TTY and launch GDM while it's updating - I now cannot see anything and live in fear of restarting.

Conclusion don't try and be clever with Linux, it will win

"Instead of asking the user to make a choice up front, maybe we can set a smart default and see if there is high demand after launch for more customization." - Rebecca Rolfe

I got out of bed at 2:10am to film the Falcon Heavy launch from my driveway, where I have a direct, due east line of sight to Cape Canaveral. I’m thinking “What a time to be alive!” and “Why didn’t I pursue the aerospace career I started in college?”

for the people saying they have devrant on the main screen or even to the once that have it in the quick actions (really nice idea) I raise you with this, I just have to push in the top left of my screen and it opens devrant.

Downloaded 130gb of movie subtitles zip files.

If I find some power deep in my heart I would normalize data and launch training on generative transformer to see if it produces decent dialogues.

It will probably stop on planning phase because I’m diving deeper towards depression.

Due to public demand I hereby launch the someone talk to @MadMadMadMrMim helpline

Never launch on the front camera!

There is not a single reason for a mobile phone camera software to launch on the front camera. Programmers of the software might believe it is "smart to memorize the last used camera", but in actuality, launching on the front camera is a common reason for not being able to capture events fast ehough.

Did the developers really think users will say "oh thank you, dear camera app, for not forgetting the last camera I used!" ?

Or, likelier than not, will they end up taking a selfie while the moment passes by behind the phone?

My team and I are working on a huge project that's been in development for years.

First deadline was in the fall last year. We were never going to make that.

Then we were supposed to be ready just after the summer holidays (months ago). We didn't make that either.

Then we were supposed to launch last week. Didn't happen, still too many critical errors and unfinished, untested features.

Now we are having daily meetings to discuss whether we'll be ready to release... that day!

Meanwhile, stability issues and other critical errors keep popping up. The product is barely finished and has not been through rigorous testing with all the latest features and bug fixes. Not to mention that we don't really have a deployment pipeline either.

And here's the kicker: The customers don't know this is coming. It's highly anticipated, but only internally. It is a replacement for an existing product, which strives towards not changing the frontend too much.

Why do we rush it so? I get that a deadline can help motivate you to reach your goal, but how motivated will we be if the launch fails and we get buried in bugs and missing features?
Would it not be better to launch it with at least the confidence of knowing that we've tried to test it properly?

client emails they are furious that changes were pushed at end of day and we broke the website. Being up at 11:30pm to fix changes to make client happy so they can test website over weekend for a Tuesday launch.

I can't be the only one that dose this.

1. Builds native android app(I want to deploy on more platforms)
2. Re builds app in react (almost ready to launch)
3. 🤔should I build this in flutter instead

Just rebooted my work station during a video conference because the VPN was flaking out.

After reboot, launch Teams to get back to the meeting. The VPN credentials dialog then pops up, but IS NOT MODAL, so I end up sending my password to the group chat...

Time to change my password, I guess.

Our company does internal projects. I send emails to owners with all the links for a sales funnel. 2 weeks go by, no feedback, we launch, and then I get changes.

Sometimes months will go by and one guy will notice something on a page and be like 'how longs this been there?'

Months... Did you read the email?

Always the same guy.

When someone over complicates everything. Turns what could be a three paragraph billeted system launch email into four dense pages that no one will finish reading. First page tooting their horn for a job not well done. Usually 'less is more'

the worst documentation I've dealt with was (sadly) some I wrote myself.

We had a project - build with no maintenance agreement attached. so I half-assed the docs and tests... a year after launch we sign a support agreement and I'm struggling to figure out how the damn thing works!

@localhost long weekend are for feature development...1 week from launch...in your in laws bonus room.

Just got my Linux dev environment set up, even got an alias working that would launch all the software I needed to test my code. Then today decided to change primary drives. At least I know how to set it back up next time, right?

!rant
Hi!
*Looking for free advice*
I'm going to buy a MacBook Pro.
I'm having a hard time in choosing whether I should buy 2015 one or the 2016 one. Is not having enough ports really such a big issue?
Also, is there going to be a new MacBook Pro launch at the WWDC? :p

You come to work 2 hours early to continue a project that needs to launch next Friday.

40 minutes later you're still eating breakfast and browsing DevRant.

The coding hour has already hit and the day hasn't even started.

Ever since the launch of my magazines redesign 7 days ago. I have been super productive

My least successful project was:

social network for student exchange. I did it for the student organization that after launch decided that they really don't need that and shut it down.

Idea was for students to subscribe to internships of their interest (for example 'developer internship') and then they get notifications when someone from the network publish internship within subscribed interests.

MRW it's launch day and every is complain about the servers.

Fucking launch my app and start my dream

I want to launch my own think tank and employ some the great devs I've worked with over the years.

No clients or stakeholders. Just us, building and releasing stuff.

- finish my project's backend, make a proto frontend
- throw the proto away and hire someone to do it for me. Or at least make the design...
- learn that freaking k8s ffs...
- if there will be spare time left - move from on-prem to aws/gcp, maybe launch an alpha

- improve my people skills
- bump my salary significantly

2019 goals...

Launch my app in Play store
Build more projects
Make work fun for client
Earn more
Learn learn and learn....

A new subsea internet cable between the country I'm in and where my server is, went live a few weeks ago

The rsync from local PC -> remote server went up from avg 500kb/s to 4mb/s

the subsea cable website says they're aiming Nov/Dec launch so it's probably in semi-live stage rn but still cool 🫡

I was thinking about the problems one of our clients faced with the launch of their project the other day, because things were rushed, stuff was omitted and in the end they could not meet the launch date, and I started making a list of hard lessons I learned over the years that would have helped them avoid this situation.

Feel free to add yours in the comments.

- Never deploy on Friday
- Never make infrastructure changes right before a launch
- Always have backups. Always!
- Version control is never optional
- A missed deadline is better than a failed launch
- If everything is urgent, nothing is important
- Fast and cheap, cheap and quality, quality and fast. Only one pair at a time can be achieved
- Never rush the start or the end of a project
- Stability is always better that speed
- Make technical decisions based on the needs of the project two years from now
- Code like you will be the only maintainor of the project two years from now. You probably will...
- Always test before you deploy
- You can never have too many backups (see above)
- Code without documentation is a tool without instructions
- Free or famous does not necessarily mean useful or good
- If you need multiple sentences to explain a method, you should probably refactor
- If your logic is checked beforehand, writing the code becomes way easier
- Never assume you understand a request the first time around. Always follow up and confirm

There are many more that should be on this list, but this is what came to mind now.

I've been at work for nearly 4 hours and have gotten barely 1 hour of work done due to my amazingly slow computer. Currently I'm waiting for visual studio to start responding. It'll respond in about 10-15 min... Takes 40 min to boot up my PC and launch my VS solutions.

Why did I agree to rush the launch of the app and do it at 4pm? 😡

Guess who just spent the entire day before launch debugging why compose doesn't work on an ec2 instance where I DIDN"T INSTALL FUCKING DOCKER

I guess this is the key difference between me and seniors. Seniors know where to look where shit breaks because they have been breaking it for at least 5 years.

Setting up a proper development environment with configs in JavaScript takes more time than to develop a small application you want to launch.

Launch a product I want to build and diversify my income streams y’all

TODAY IS THE LAUNCH DAY OF THE BIGGEST PROJECT IVE WORKED ON..

A magazine website.
We launch the redesign in three hours.

AND IM HERE SITTING SEARCHING FOR BUGS

My first day of Launch Academy is tomorrow. Correcting a decade old mistake of not going to college for Comp Sci as originally planned. I'm excited, any tips on injecting a ton of code into your brain at once?

That awesome feeling when you launch your application on prod server....

*after 5 mins*
Customers start calling about dashboard not working....

Just installed KISS launcher on my Android and, omg it changes so much I like it!! It forces you to do and launch the app you need without being surrounded by tons of icons on the screen, awesome 😊

Here I am, a year after product launch, deleting features that delayed launch, introduced complexities, doubled the database load and made me miserable, because we figured out nobody has ever used them.

When developer gives you a shit website the night before launch. Fml

I don't know if it's a déjà vu or something but I saw an iPhone launch with bigger screen and a pen!

My app is randomly crashing after I launch it. It stays open for a minimum of around 5 minutes and after that it decided to make suicide. Dunno why.

I have a really slow machine and it's running Ubuntu, so annoying. I launch VS Code and Chrome, 30mins in and it fkn hangs, then I have to hard reboot.

The fuck is going on with the app, I couldn't launch it for days now.

It's clearly in the contract people.
You walk a client through the entire contract and come launch they want to add pages and change layouts without paying extra because they have 24 hours to launch.
What don't you get about "you approved the site map, layouts, and designs which is what we quoted you for, contract clearly states how much per extra pages and how much to change layouts and designs after approval and work processed"

MRW it's almost launch day

Finally got a project I’ve been working overtime on for the last 18 months or so ready for a 1.0 launch! Still some features we want to build in for down the line, but it’s nice to finally hit a meaningful milestone...

can anyone guess who said the following?

"Titanium allows us to launch new features really quickly and have an immediate impact. For example, we added an avatar builder with millions of configuration options, yet it only required a few lines of code to be different between iOS and Android."

Just when I thought Microsoft is going in the right direction with the launch of dark Surface products and dark mode for Windows, they took all my hopes away with their shitty Windows Update thing. Completed download and rebooted to find out that the update has vanished. Great, thanks for wasting my data, Windows. :3

Fucking incompetent manager.
I could spend my time trying to convince him about the leaner, faster way to launch.
But in order to maintain my own sanity and peace of mind, I have decided to let him screw up the project. Time to plan for an exit.

"Instead of asking the user to make a choice up front, maybe we can set a smart default and see if there is high demand after launch for more customization." - Rebecca Rolfe

An AI that's sole purpose is to teach us what we don't know or something we missed by combing the Internet and putting all the information together. For example, it should be able to figure out the most efficient way to launch a rocket based on everything we know already

[Conference Call on Project Launch]
🤡: we just came up with an extra list of features to add to the system
🙊: but we just finished the system and it is ready on UAT server to sign off
🤡: we want these features, they are essential for a better backend admin experience
🤡: and we have been working on this project for almost a year!! we need these features and launch now!
🙊: (well, it took you guys six months to sign off on the initial graphics designs...) can we first launch what we have on UAT site first as they have been sitting here waiting for your approval
🤡: ok. i will test them and provide feedback. if it’s all good, then you can launch it.
🙊: ok. we will do another set of UAT after launch for your new features.
🤡: ok. i will let you know when we can launch the current UAT.

[Two weeks later]
🤡: #%^#*+!! why are the new features not on the UAT site yet!! why are there no changes after two week!! we cannot accept more delays! really need to launch asap!
🙈: 🖕🏽

When every night is a launch night... So tired.
Been trying to launch this Magento 2 application for about 3 weeks now. It's going to be the death of me.

My dad bought a computer when i was 6 or 7. Trying to launch games via ms-dos.

But we also had the “minitel” a french thing that connected you to a network. I played games on that too.

Gnome, you are a piece of shit. It has taken 4 people over 3 hours to create a .desktop file to launch a fucking bash script due to varying levels of inexperience.

Die in a fire you flaming putrescent turd.

What the fuck does putrescent even mean?

Launch my entertainment company and leave [day job] to focus on it. If things go really well, have enough money to spend my time working on whatever projects I want irregardless of job.

Google delays launch of Lenovo Phab2 pro by a month.. and launches Pixel..

maybe because nobody would buy Pixel if both were launched together..

(Coz Phab2 has Tango and thus the first phone that will actually support AR!)

deciding at what point to release the beta of your software. you will always find thing you think need to be in there before launch but it never ends and have to bite the bullet and expect some complaints. I planned on launching 3 months ago :(

Can we patent an Idea? I have my product A ready for launch. Company B claims that we have patent for that idea. We both trying to solve exact same problem using exact same methodology. How should I proceed? Any legal advisors here?

Don't you hate it when you have too many GB or RAM occupied and then you decide to launch a VM without realizing that Virtualbox will not only take the remaining space left but will also cap your RAM and everything freezes!? Uugghhh!

I'm getting more frustrated every day. In the past 2 months the requirements have changed dozen of times, which resulted in so many unnecessary delay.

The date for the soft launch has changed multiple times as well. One moment there is going to be a soft launch, the next week they decide to launch earlier without a soft launch.

On top of all the annoying IT related issues, our CEO is on holiday. The only person left in the company remotely capable to replace him for a few weeks is me. So beside changing requirements and deadlines, I have to deal with a lot of other shit as well.

To make things even harder, most coworkers from our support department are on holiday. Just one person is left and his wife will be getting a baby very, very soon. Ofcourse, I'm happy for him, but taking over our support department as well is not what I'm looking forward to.

The soft launch is schedule for next Monday. I'm so tired and I'm distracted every day by non IT issues. The most important things work, but there is still so much to do and I can hardly concentrate. The two other parties who are involved are far from ready either and I have to find shortcuts for their problems every morning, because they can't fix it for themselves.

Well, at least writing it down here helped my stress a little bit :)

Launching the company's platform setup script:
"we added some variables to your bashrc. please source it and re launch this script"
"source .bashrc"
"we added some variables to your bashrc. please source it and re launch this script"
...
You had one job.

Launch modes in Android?

Standard: It creates a new instance of an activity in the task from which it was started. Multiple instances of the activity can be created and multiple instances can be added to the same or different tasks.
Eg: Suppose there is an activity stack of A -> B -> C.
Now if we launch B again with the launch mode is “standard”, the new stack will be A -> B -> C -> B.
singleton: It is the same as the standard, except if there is a previous instance of the activity that exists in the top of the stack, then it will not create a new instance but rather send the intent to the existing instance of the activity.
Eg: Suppose there is an activity stack of A -> B.
Now if we launch C with the launch mode as “singleton”, the new stack will be A -> B -> C as usual.
Now if there is an activity stack of A -> B -> C.
If we launch C again with the launch mode as “singleton”, the new stack will still be A -> B -> C.
SingleTask: A new task will always be created and a new instance will be pushed to the task as the root one. So if the activity is already in the task, the intent will be redirected to onNewIntent() else a new instance will be created. At a time only one instance of activity will exist.
Eg: Suppose there is an activity stack of A -> B -> C -> D.
Now if we launch D with the launch mode as “single-task”, the new stack will be A -> B -> C -> D as usual.
Now if there is an activity stack of A -> B -> C -> D.
If we launch activity B again with the launch mode as “single-task”, the new activity stack will be A -> B. Activities C and D will be destroyed.
SingleInstance: Same as a single task but the system does not launch any activities in the same task as this activity. If new activities are launched, they are done so in a separate task.
Eg: Suppose there is an activity stack of A -> B -> C -> D. If we launch activity B again with the launch mode as “single instance”, the new activity stack will be:
Task1 — A -> B -> C
Task2 — D

My colleagues don't look at me weird when I reply to "so what did you get up to in your week off" with "played the new World of Warcraft expansion launch".
Well not always weird.

So I've been really excited about the SpaceX Falcon Heavy launch today and my professor RESCHEDULES THE MIDTERM for the same time slot. Fml