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Search - "not my call"
-
Me using the Siri app on my iPhone:
Me: "Siri, call my wife."
Siri: "Samantha McLaughlin is not in your contacts."
Me: "Samantha Gibbs is my wife."
Siri: "I've added Samantha Gibbs as your wife."
Me: "Call my wife."
Siri: "Which wife?"6 -
A few years ago, i got a call which went like this:
Phone: *rings*
Me: *looks at call, recognises the number and picks up*
Me: "Hello! Haven't heard from you in a while! How are you doing?"
Him: "I have a problem with my PC, could you..."
Me: *hangs up*
Aside from not even getting a "hello, how are you?" at the start of the call, here's the plot-twist:
A - This was my goddamn Brother calling
B - It was my goddamn birthday23 -
Manager: “We need you to stay in the room and not go outside to make personal calls on your mobile.”
Me: “uhmm okaaaay...”
*I get a call* “Yeah, I called about making a doctor appointment....my symptoms? Ummmm...*lowers voice to say it but everyone still hears...totally embarrassing*
Same manager, later, at performance review: “We found it highly inappropriate for you to be talking about your personal medical issues on the phone in front of everyone in the office.”15 -
Stolen from an awesome book but my new favourite line ;)
Someone: “Can you repair my computer, it`s not working anymore?”
Me: “Do you call Leonardo Dicaprio when your Tv is broken?”7 -
Postman: We will stop supporting our Chrome app. Please download our "Native" app for better performance.
No motherfuckers.. Go die, alone, while your fucking family watch you bleed to death helplessly.
Electron is not native, don't mix true native development with lazy ass electron. Fuck you. A native postman would've been around 15MB in size but your "native" installer is 68MB so shut the fuck up and don't call it native or I will stick my native dick in your fucking throats.
I develop native apps So yeah, I'm pissed when web devs are starting to call electron and JS as native desktop apps... They are not... Now fuck off you smelly cunts.40 -
Omfg this fucking guy!!!!
Context:
We are going through a major refactor of some of our backend components. I was tasked with cleaning up our ML code while another guy was tasked with cleaning up the general CRUD side of the backend, let's call him DA for "dumb ass".
** At 11pm
DA: I am getting a strange error from your backend. Look:
"Invalid call: method=PUT expected=[POST]"
Me: you need to send a post request not a put request
DM: no, it's not that. I am sending the right thing
Me: ... Let me see...
* 15min ish of testing *
No, it works fine on my version, 1.1.0 what's your version?
DM: I'm on 1.1.0.
Me: send me code?
DM: *send
"request.put(..."
Me: you are sending a PUT... It's literally in the screenshot. Send a Post
DM: I am
Me: no, send a Post
DM: I don't understand, I am sending the request
Me: it's a post not a put
DM: but...
Me: it's a post not a put
Me: good night!!!!!!12 -
Interviewer: "Show me a cool side-project you have been working on!"
Me: "No! I do not have a cool side-project to show you! I work to pay the bills, and do other things in my spare time! Like go fishing, or play video games. Why the fuck are you assuming that I spend my weekends coding for fun!? Do you call random people asking them questions every Saturday and Sunday just for the LOLs of it?"36 -
Today's my lucky day for job rejections...
"Unfortunately we have decided not to proceed with you as a candidate because the salary range you expect lies outside our budget."
That's very interesting indeed because in the very first interview (phone call) you asked me about that range and I gave it, straight and simple.
Then I had to do a coding challenge, which I usually refuse, but did anyway. It took about 15 hours. Let's not forget that it had nothing to do with the job I was applying for, but OK.
After that, a second interview, which took 1.5 hours and a third, which gobbled up 2 hours of my time.
Then you tell me that you're not willing to fork over the dosh, after having wasted 18.5 hours of my time!
Thank you very much, you anus blossoms!9 -
So I have implemented all the features required for the current release. Carefully reviewed my code several times, but no testing.
Tester: everything passed green. Not sure whether you're a good dev or I'm a bad tester.
Me: let's call it a draw.10 -
Client(On Call): I emailed some query a day before. I got a response too. But, i am not able to find answer of my specific query.
Me: Let me check that for you. Yes, it is there. See the mail carefully.
Client: No. It's not there.
Me: Can you read the whole mail for me?
Client: Sure. *Started Reading* Oh yes. Yes. it is here. *Hangs up the Phone.*
Me: Sigh.5 -
!dev
Coffee. I love it.
But with that, I mean *coffee*.
No I don't want a fucking cappucino or a latte or a whatever-the-fuck you call it that is coffee mixed with something not-coffeeish.
I love *coffee* and I want my coffee black and strong as fuck without any bullshit added to it.47 -
>Be me arriving at work early for my daily morning relaxation as I surf reddit etc in an hour of euphoria without having to deal with employees
>Get a phone call JUST 5 MINUTES AFTER
> User was complaining that we ran an update which totally wrecked his machine as it didn't want to turn on..
>Ask him to check if the switch on
>Says that he can't see in the dark
>Ask him to turn on the lights
>He says he cannot because the whole power to the building is currently out in a blackout
THIS CALL TOOK 30 MINUTES OF MY BELOVED RELAXATION JUST TO END UP IN HIM NOT BEING ABLE TO COMPREHEND THAT A COMPUTER CANNOT RUN WITHOUT POWER
>rant over UGHHHH10 -
I have a telephone headset with a "confusing" mute button. Sometimes it works normally, but quite often it will "double-toggle" (toggle twice as though I pressed it twice, which essentially has no effect) - so I'm either left muted or left un-muted, the same as before I pressed the button at all - so I have to press it again, sometimes several times, for it to actuary work.
While I'm at my desk, I have a visual indicator of mute status (a light that turns green for un-muted or red for muted), so I can easily tell if my mic is hot or not. My old headset had a nice audible beep reminder if I was muted, but the new headset? Nope, not-so-much.
I work from home, while my wife works at an office; so each morning she leaves, but I stay in the home office. I almost always see her off one way or another, usually doing or saying something funny as she heads out.
So, one day, I'm on a large conference call with a number of cross-team managers, and my wife is about to head out the door. With the meeting droning on in my headset, I was in the kitchen with her for a while helping finish clean up after breakfast and getting her ready to go.
She needed to pack an ice-pack for some reason, and for the random humor of it, I start screaming something to the effect of "GIMMIE YO ICE PACKS - GIMMIE ALLLL YO ICE PACKS - YEAH! YEAH! IMMA PUT MY BAAAAAAAAALLLLLS ON IT - WHOOOOOOOOO!"
During which time I am jumping around like a crazy person, including actually grabbing one of the ice packs, putting it down the front of my pants and screaming. Loudly.
It was after my own screaming I overheard more than one person yelling on the bridge line "YOU'RE NOT MUTED! YOU'RE NOT MUTED!"
I have seldom felt such raw, unadulterated panic.
I rushed back to my home office - yes, the green light is on my desk - my mic is hot. When I pressed mute at some point earlier in the call, it double-toggled, leaving me un-muted, and I never knew.
Even more embarrassing was the chat session I saw on my computer screen. It was from my manager (one of the managers on the call) - he had pinged me several times while I was in the kitchen.
It read something like:
hey, you there?
is that your phone
I think your phone isn't muted
mute
dude, mute
is that you?
MUTE!
did you just say balls?10 -
Fuck those useless calls!
PM: customer X wants a call in an hour.
Me: they didn't send emails before. No questions, no prep, no call.
PM: yeah but they want to talk.
Me: these unprepared calls are pointless. I'll be sitting there, noting down the questions and telling them I'll have to look up the details.
PM: shall I tell them that you don't want to talk to them?
Me: I don't care, it's your call, do whatever you want.
PM: that's not professional.
Me: oh you're calling it professional to sit there with a pencil, writing down crap or what?
PM: what's the problem?!
Me: I've had this shit for the last two fucking calls, and they were so unprepared that they wasted half of the call just reading up, and I'm fed up with this shit!
PM: but they are the customers, and they aren't that happy.
Me: yeah, and do you know why? Because our schedule is completely fucked up and our management has been ignoring ANY warning from engineering for WEEKS! That's why they are unhappy and not because I'm not holding their fucking hands!
PM: hey, but you can't tell me what I have to do!
Me: and you can't tell me either! [he's my PM, but technically not my superior.]
PM: so no call or what?
Me: you're free to have your call. I'll sort out the shit that they're concerned about, putting that down in a proper email, and then we have at least some basis for discussion!
PM: (left for his call)
Btw., my cursing was the same in the live conversation with him.9 -
To my ex manager
you left to berlin, and left me to rot
my new lead sucks, i kid you not
it was ok if I slacked off, You used to be chill
But my new lead is uptight, he's on my list to kill
I wanna run errands in work hours, is that so bad?
was doing so for years, now i lost what i had
I cant drive in peace, coz i know he'd call
so i had to cancel plans to go to the mall
its like 10 to 6 is now constant work
I hate my new lead, he is such a jerk17 -
Finally done with being on call/standby so thought I'd order myself a pizza calzone 😍
I'm not saying that this thing is small but it's smaller than my hands.
I don't have very big hands 😭9 -
Dad : Stop playing games so much
Me : I'm working on a project dad, not playing games
Dad : Then what do you call that *points to my 2nd screen on the side*
Me : That's the project, i'm making that game
Dad : Sure you are
Me : *changes bunch of stuff* see...
Dad : Ok i believe you *leaves the room*5 -
Morning after my linux administration exam my mother called 15 times to wake me up. When I finaly answered the phone she she was worried so she asked.
Mom: wtf is wrong with you, is everything okay?
Me: not sure, i think something went wrong. I'll send you the log files later. *Hangs up the phone.
Apparently I do shit like that every time she tries to call me in the morning as she writes down our "conversations" just to laugh at me later.
brain@sleep:~$ sudo rm -rf /9 -
"could you put me through to a colleague who has the ability to have an actual intellectual conversation?"
-
Somehow I finished the call but God damn it took some energy and self control not to completely lose my shit. His tone was also very denigrating (he just didn't agree on something which was his fucking problem)
Fuck him.6 -
HR: Hi we got your application. We'd like to schedule a call. Can you fill this out to pick a time?
Me: Sure, sorry first I'd like to ask a question. You are based on the other side of the country and i'm not able to relocate. Are you open to remote workers? Your job spec didn't mention either way.
HR: GREAT question! At this moment no we are not. We need people here on site. If you'd like, we can have a call to discuss if you fill out the form.
Me: ..... take time out of my day so you can tell me "No" again? ..... i'm alright thanks13 -
1. Submit my resume, get an email asking to schedule an interview
2. Schedule the interview
3. One day before the scheduled time, I get an email saying that the interview is being rescheduled to another time two days later (no explanation for why they did this)
4. I clear out my schedule and wait for the interview call (it’s suppose to be at 2:30, but I wait like 15 minutes early because I don’t want to miss it)
5. I don’t get a call
6. At 3:00, I call the company and ask whats going on. They apologize and say my interviewer will call me back as soon as he gets back from lunch.
7. He doesn’t call.
8. At 4:00 I call them back. Apparently the guy who was suppose to interview me went home. I ask them wtf they are doing and if this is how they treat their employees. They said they would reschedule the interview and call me back once they did.
9. No one calls.
10. I wait a week, call them back, and am told that the funding for my position didn’t come through (what does that mean? You’re not hiring programmers to design the software for your billion dollar war machines anymore? Seriously?).
I’ve had it with this company. I don’t know if it was just this incompetent recruiting group or if this is a company full of scumbags, but I mean, really?1 -
Mgmt: We will need you to work on Saturday
Me: I'm afraid I can't, I have plans that cannot be rescheduled.
Mgmt: Then please call your coleague out of vacation. Treat this as super urgent.
Me: I do not feel comfortable calling him out as, as you know, he is on leave (family emergencies) and it is a weekend. I do not think it would be ethical to do so either.
Mgmt: *crickets chirping in my mailbox*
Me: *Updating my LinkedIn*6 -
I attended a webcall with the cat on my shoulder, some manager complained it was not professional.
Now, I do not know who that was so I'll have to just shoot in the crowd and take innocent victims, but from now I'll attend every single call with as many cats on screen as possible. Possible outcomes, and both are fine by me, either they cut down the amount of unnecessary calls -as to limit the amount of catness on their screen- or learn to grow the fuck up because unlike some retard I get paid for working, not for busting the balls to the people that actually work.10 -
I get a call: "Hey the site is down. Fix it!"
Worked on my workstation, not on my phone => DNS issue.
Local cache: "All OK"
ISP's DNS: "No record"
Google DNS: "Server error"
MXToolbox: "All OK"
CloudFlare DNS: "Domain? What domain?"
After a day of fucking around with configs and wanting to strangle the customer support guy, I just started pressing buttons, until suddenly, it worked. Turns out I'd accidentally enabled DNSSEC on a domain, that wasn't configured for it.
Lesson learned: There is no official DNS error code for "DNSSEC failed somewhere upstream". If you're lucky, you might get something useful out of the authoritative server, but apparently not on Mondays.8 -
So today I got a call that an end user decided to try to be a developer. He built and ran a bulk edit script on his company's server.....
Without a scaled test....
As root....
From root....
Without backups....
How's this my problem again?
Oh right, it's not (yet)!5 -
Start a new job.
It is amazing.
What, you will not pay my JetBrains? Ugh... cheap boss.
Do you call this scrum?
Now I need to build this dumbass feature.
Wait, all the seasoned people are leaving?
Why did I choose this place at first?
Linkedin.
Interview.
This sounds awesome.
Good salary.
Bye guys.
Start a new job...8 -
"We have another major incident spinning up. QueenMorgana, are you free?" NO, I'M FINISHING UP THE NOTES FROM MY LAST TWO CALLS THAT JUST ENDED, WHY DON'T YOU CALL IN, LAZY FUCKWAD.
Why is it so damn difficult for my boss to cover a call when we're all busy DOING ALL THE LITTLE POINTLESS SHIT HE GIVES UP. He had me follow up from my coworker's call yesterday, not seeing the logic in, IF IT WERE STILL A FUCKING ISSUE, THEY WOULD HAVE CALLED US BACK THIS MORNING.
So now, I have to sit on the line AGAIN and take notes for shit that's not even a major issue BECAUSE IT'S BEEN DOWN FOR A WEEK. IF IT'S DOWN THAT LONG AND YOU DON'T SUBMIT A TICKET TO ME OR CALL OUR MAJOR INCIDENT LINE, I DON'T GET PAID ENOUGH TO RESPOND LIKE IT'S AN EMERGENCY.
Also, fucking lazy asswipe of a "teammate" bitching about being on a call for over 8 hours, while the rest of us are on back to back calls. He's never been on a long call and has been here a year longer than I have. I've been on a 14 hour and a 16 hour, and my other teammate has handled a 26 hour call. 8 HOURS IS FUCKING NOTHING AND YOU WORK FROM HOME SO DON'T EVEN HAVE TO WEAR PANTS.
**spilled 3 cups of coffee this morning, and have an expensive maintenance on my car today, likely to explode on just about everyone**24 -
So yesterday one of the "senior" python developers woke me up at 1 am (we work in different time zones, and he knows how many hours I'm ahead) asking why isn't his code working. The error message was:
[ERROR] Runtime.ImportModuleError: Unable to import module 'app': xxx is not installed, run `pip install xxx` Traceback (most recent call last)
I am at lose of words and patience. Not only idiots who can't google simple stuff are seniors, additionaly we went from "DevOps is a culture" straight to "hey I'm developer in my silo, if it doesn't work on my machine it's DevOps problem, plz fix".12 -
I hate it when people don't want to work for themselves and when I share something for their knowledge
"Wow what pro", "Dude you're so smart" etc in a sarcastic manner.
Dude wtf, you don't want to improve yourself then fuck off. You're there because of yourself not because I fucked it up for you.
You reap what you sow and i don't need people discrediting my effort to get to where I am today. I get it, I'm not even what you would call "pro", So what shitface?! I wanna be there someday. If you don't then just die. I don't need people like you in my life 😬😬😬7 -
My boss asked me to do tech support today as one of tech support employee was not feeling well.
The very first call i attended, went like:
Me : Sir, this is xyz support desk. How may i help you?
*Listening his problem*
Me : Sir solution is pretty simple. Just do a Right click on application shortcut icon and then select "Open File Location".
Client : where can i find "Right Click"?2 -
D: Hey, your stuff isn't working, fix your stuff or it will become a road blocker.
Me: Why it is not working?
D: Because I used the same table as you used, and I changed a few things. there are 22 reasons for it.
(polite conversation stopped and I redirected him to my manager)
WTF? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? YOU CHANGED MY STUFF WITHOUT TELLING ME AND YOU ARE NOT USING ANY SOURCE CONTROL? WTF? YOU CREATED THIS SHIT AND CALL MY STUFF NOT WORKING? ARE YOU A FUCKING IDIOT?
CUT YOUR FINGERS AND POINT TO YOURSELF.2 -
Girl: hello this is amazon support center, hope you're feeling great today, how are you?
Me: im good...
Girl: glad to hear that, how may i help you?
Me: a few moments ago i was on... sigh, actually im not good im extremely sad right now because i was scammed on my amazon account for $250, im calling to ask if that product can be charged back.
*literally 30-60 seconds of silence*
Me: .....hello??
Girl: ok sir ill give u another line to call please dont hang up ok? stay with me
Me: maam im not doing suici
Girl: +1-532...
Me: ...2 -
Not directly a rant by me, but it would be a rant if my co worker would write it.
So lets the story start. Today my coworker wanted to see my new smartphone. And one of them is a little troll. After I unlocked he shouted "Ok Google call 666666"...
Lucky for me, my phone didn't respond. 10 minutes later he wrote me, that his phone is calling 666666 for 10 minutes xD.
There are about 20€ gone.
Karma5 -
> me on call
> had to much wine
> suddenly, phone starts making sound
> holy shit, I am on call and I am not supposed to drink
> Calls taxi because shit is looking bad at work. Everything look down according to the sms I get, I had to pay the taxi from my own pocket.
> 40 min later, arrive at work. Walk into the serverroom.
> Go to the the server that is monitoring everything.
> Check networkcable, it is loose. Push it a little.
> Goddamnit, that was it.
> Realize I never doublechecked if stuff really was down from home....5 -
I used to work in a call center for a local hospital.
One night, all of our lines are swamped. Literally no time for a break between phone calls, +15 minute wait times. I answer the next call:
Me: "Its a marvelous Monday at AskIT, how may I help you?"
Doctor: "This is Dr. [Noone Care]. I need you to fix my password now."
Me: "Absolutely! You should be able to enter a new password now."
Doctor: "MY HANDS ARE NOT FOR PASSWORDS, MY HANDS ARE FOR SURGERY!"
😩 So glad I don't work for doctors anymore. Oh and the best part is, he had selected the general phone queue, rather than the doctor queue (~3 minute wait time instead).7 -
Not an office prank, but still makes me laugh..
When my oldest daughter was about 8 months, she loved slapping the keyboard on my wife's laptop. More times than I can count with my hands I received a phone call from her asking how to rotate the screen back from upside-down.
Pwned by a baby3 -
My friend and boss,told me he would teach me code 2 years in a half ago.
I didnt know what css or html was and i used to call java javascript.
I can know create my own module with webpack, have my automated doc, use react, redux, he taught me linux, git,unit testing, databases,docker, and so on...
Im not an expert in any of it butbi know what they are for and can play with them more or less comfortably.
The best advice he ever gave me was:
“coding is not about coding. We are like the greath painters of history. They were great at painting but even more at creating. If you have no creativity, you can paint as well as you want, its worthless.”2 -
I'M NOT HELPDESK. I CAN'T FIX YOUR BROWSER OPTIONS. I LOVE YOU TO FUCKING PIECES BECAUSE YOU STOP THE INCREDIBLY FUCKING STUPID CALLS, BUT I CAN'T HELP YOU and now I feel like a prick. Call your boss and make him do his fucking job. Please. I don't want to scream at you. I need you in my life...10
-
I don't understand this. How is that Facebook is one of the biggest company in the world and have the worst fucking mobile apps ever created. I just use messenger to talk with my mom and it's utter rubbish.
When a call arrives, there's no way to silence that call apart from setting the phone to mute. All the other apps shut up when you either click power button or volume button. But this fucking messenger piece of Satan's anus won't respond to any fucking button when I have a call.
Not only that, once you have received the call, there's no way you can rotate the app without ending the call, turning on auto rotate and call again. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? how the fuck is it that you're so fucking big but you don't have this simple features in your fucking app?
And yeah, most of the time, when I receive a call in mobile, it doesn't appear on the desktop website. If it does and I receive the call from there, the mobile app still keeps shouting. AND GUESS WHAT, at that point, if I reject the call from the mobile, it will end the call that I accepted from the desktop. HAHA, WHAT A FUCKING SURPRISE.
Facebook, please stop being a piece of shite. Put your goddamn money to good use. If you can't make a good app, maybe outsource it to other companies. They will do a better job than you.21 -
Swagger does not send request body for GET calls.! WHAT THE FUCK..! And the argument supporting is get calls should not have any request payloads and rather should have response payloads since its a "get" call. Are you serious?? What if there are parameters to be passed which cannot be accomodated in the params or the header. Even though people are kind of literally abusing on their issues page still they adamantly refuse to add support for this.
Swagger you had high standards in my book. You just fell so deep down there is no coming back.3 -
Dear Managers,
This is not efficient:
Boss: * calls *
Me: * answers *
B: there's a bug in feature ABC! The form doesn't work!
M: ABC uses a lot of forms. Is it Form A, B, or C?
B: Umm... let's just go on a Zoom call!
* 5 minutes trying to set up a Zoom call *
* 3 more minutes trying to find the form *
B: This form in here.
M: It works fine for me. What data are you inputting?
B: * takes 5 minutes trying to reproduce the bug * (in the meantime, the call is basically an awkward silence)
You spent 5 minutes wasting both of our times trying to set up a Zoom meeting, and another 8 wasting MY tine trying to find the bug.
This is efficient:
B: There is a bug in form C. If I try to upload this data, it malfunctions.
M: Thank you. I'll look into it.
You saved me 8 minutes of staring at a screen and saved us both another 5 minutes of setting up a meeting.6 -
*INCOMING CALL FROM MY NETWORK PROVIDER*
HI,
I'm calling from *my network provider* and I wanted to check if you would like to port to our network.
This happened 3 times in a day already. And now 4th time.
Me : Look man, I'm already on the same network and I don't need to port.
Guy : You should have told this to me in the beginning. You wasted my time in not doing that.
THIS CUM DRINKING PIECE OF SHIT PUNKASS BITCH MOTHERFUCKER COULDN'T DO A SIMPLE SEARCH ON HIS COMPUTER BEFORE GIVING ME A CALL AND THEN TELLS ME I WASTED HIS TIME.5 -
100% focused, balls-deep in the zone, not sure I could have recalled my own name if you'd asked me...
Suddenly out of nowhere, someone's asking me about a job I worked on over a week ago. I'm mostly answering in just a few syllables, struggling to surface from 20 layers of Call Stack.
This goes on for a full 5 minutes before they say, "sorry were you busy?"
No, I was just about to beat Solitaire.
Of course I was fucking busy jesus fucking christ, did you not see all that code and shit on my fucking screen when you suddenly and urgently had to disturb me?10 -
>> this === rant
<< true
At beginning of this year, I only knew HTML, JS, and CSS so I just applied for offers like "Jr Apprentice Dev in Front-End"
In a interview call, the woman told me that they will send me a test asking about my JS and HTML5 knowledge.
When I look in my inbox, the mail subject says "Back-end Test".
Then I call the woman:
Me: "Hello, I have received the test mail, but maybe it's wrong. I applied for a Front-End position and the test is about backend! "
She: "Do you have skills in JS and HTML5?"
Me: "Yes!, and CSS3"
She: "Well, the test is about that. JS, jQuery, and HTML5"
Me: "..."
Me: "Sorry, that languages are Front-End. In the subject say 'Back-End' and Back-End is PHP, SQL, MySQL, Java, .Net... I don't know nothing about that. I only know HTML, JS, CSS."
She: "It's the same"
Me: "I sorry but it's not the same. Fron-End is client-side, what users sees. Animation, colors, FXs, buttons, forms... And Back-End is server-side, what users doesn't see."
She: "Well, JS, HTML, and CSS is backend for us. We call it that way too"
Me: "Sorry but that is wrong. I invite you to read some basic info. Now I am confused"
Of course that I am not confused. That idi0t was wrong.
Perhaps recruiters should take some info about areas where they are recruiting... (:T)3 -
I saw an article about the best open source text editors today. I was expecting to see atom, vs code etc. Well no, the author says "sublime text. It's not exactly open source or even freeware software, but there are lots of open source plugins for it."
Well why in world would you title the article best open source editors?? Why not call it what it is: "my lovefest for sublime text and some plugins." You could post it on your stupid blog with 1 reader per month where I would never find it and waste my time on it.9 -
Drunken neighbor: Did i piss you?
I: No.
Drunken neighbor: I know i do, but i want a girl. This is my problem.
I: Go find her.
Drunken neighbor: I can't, i'm black.
I: It's not the reason.
Drunken neighbor: It is.
I: Reason si you are dirty, drunken pig.
Drunken neighbor: You are racist!
I: Och, sorry, i forgot. You are dirty, drunken, black pig. One more time you will wake us at 3am i'll call ku klux klan on you so my girlfriend can sleep at night. Now fuck off and let us sleep.
Happy new year.7 -
So it happens that yesterday I stayed all night to install some Meraki antennas. "Installed, configured and tested sucessfully!"
This morning i was a approached by a user asking me why his iPhone is not connecting on sight. I explain the antenna thing and he asks me AGAIN, WHY isn't auto connection since its the SAME INTERNET... I try to go through the basics with no success. He shows how disappointed he is with my stupidity.
Then he asks where i got my diploma so he can make sure never to send his sons there, since i cant tell the difference of an internet provider and antennas who just distribute the internet signal. WELL, living and learning.
WTF was i thinking, hes right! OMG my whole life i believed we had to set up routers and all sort of hardware.
All i had to do is call to the Providers Call-centers, im sure they have PROPER ENGINEERS THERE!6 -
(A fucking pushy assrat of a LinkedIn recruiter called me at my job today, this is my message after he cowardly hung up before I could inherit the call from our secretary)
Dear Mr. $PUSHY_RECRUITER
Please don't call me again, as I already wrote you my unavailability in March.
I don't see your logic in calling me AT MY JOB. It does not make any sense except if you just wanted to call me to see if I'm still there and then hang up like a fucking coward.
If you really wanted to hire me, you should have written me a more thorough description about the job after my initial message of unavailability thus creating the chance for me to reconsider your offer.
But since you seemingly thought it was an absolutely great idea to call me at the workplace (thus making me look really bad in the eyes of my coworkers) I wish you a sincere and honest "fuck you".
Please don't ever call or message me again.
I am extremely happy at my current job and will not consider leaving in the next 100 years.
Signed,
Yet another pissed off developer.6 -
I know it's not done yet but OOOOOH boy I'm proud already.
Writing a JSON parser in Lua and MMMM it can parse arrays! It converts to valid Lua types, respects the different quotation marks, works with nested objects, and even is fault-tolerant to a degree (ignoring most invalid syntax)
Here's the JSON array I wrote to test, the call to my function, and another call to another function I wrote to pretty print the result. You can see the types are correctly parsed, and the indentation shows the nested structure! (You can see the auto-key re-start at 1)
Very proud. Just gotta make it work for key/value objects (curly bracket bois) and I'm golden! (Easier said than done. Also it's 3am so fuck, dude)15 -
I fucking hate holidays. Every goddamn time when it's a holiday, that's when I need to go to the store and get something, only to find out that they're closed. And what for.. holidays are - to me at least - no more than an excuse for people to not go to work for the day.
So, now I ran out of booze, and can't continue developing and testing my breathalyzer until Monday.
Then it hit me.. what if I take all my Arduino equipment (laptop, jumper wires, ...) to the café and deploy my build environment on a table there?
Eh, no no no. I don't want some idiot to come up to me saying "YOU EVIL HEKORMAN!!!" and have to explain that just like when you call a banker who's working with the money vaults a thief, it's wrong to call someone that's developing shit an evil hacker.. one should strive to not throw mindless accusations out of unknowingness. Not that I'm a good example of that though. But still.
It's probably that or some stupid bitch coming up to me asking to hack her boyfriend's Phasebuk.. that said, that could probably be an opportunity to get in her pants. But then, I don't wanna insert my meat in an idiot like that... ._.
So, no booze it is then? Thanks national holidays!
"Ok Google, remind me every day before a holiday because I really couldn't care less about them!!"16 -
Why the fuck do employers post remote position jobs, only to let you know in the first call that they require the employee to live in/near a certain city. That's not a remote position and it happened several times in my job hunt8
-
Tomorrow Halloween is being celebrated in many nations as you might know. So we do in germany. Given that in Germany tomorrow is a national Holiday, the company skipped work today, with me being on call.
My On-Call time almost was over so I got ready to party (getting into my costume), not expecting any further calls.
I finished dressing up, still had some time, so I dug into coding a bit, as a costumer called. A customer from china. As I got told later on China does not celebrate Halloween in October and they do in another way.
So I set there, accepting the call, with my Camera set to autostart (Company policy).
Camera. On.
In. Costume.
As a monk.
With a bleach white face.
I was greeted by a man starring me "into the eyes". Took a good 1-3 secs til we bursted out in laugher. One of the funniest calls I had so far 😂 (and a short one, thanks China-Man)2 -
Not awkward, just annoying. Had a recruiter call me out of nowhere and then try to pressure me into immediately declaring my salary expectations straight up saying "so we know you're not wasting our time". You're the one calling me, asshole; I tell him to state his budget so I know he's not wasting my fucking time. He named a sum that was laughable, especially knowing this company offered much more in their own listing.1
-
Dear Colleague who ended a call I overheard today with the sentence "I'm off next week, if there is anything - anything! -, call me on my mobile phone!". Fuck you. If you value your work more than your family, that's not only your problem. You're fucking my clients expectations, too. I don't think you're a hero. You're a moron.4
-
Just got a call about a site I made fo someone being down. It's 3am on a Monday morning. I have school in 6 hours. My client knows this. Go fuck yourself I'm not getting out of bed at 3 in the morning.
Note: we live in the same time zone.5 -
Was asked to pop down to my bosses office for 5 minutes, turns out I was interviewing someone. Not one word of warning was given to me prior the phone call asking me to come down.2
-
A company called me for a job interview for my internship. As they saw my LinkedIn, they said I had a great skill set built up as I was studying Software Engineering and working aside as a freelancer.
After a short talk they mentioned my international business management (IBMS) minor that I have taken and criticized me that I took a wrong path of my career, told me to rethink my position of my studies and said they will not take me into consideration for the position.
That left me puzzled. Like what was the reason of that call, just to criticize my decisions?
Can't remember the company name that called me here in The Netherlands.11 -
Started my own business recently, it's still in the works but it's picking up nicely... Had a (l)user call me this morning asking if I could help him with his website design. I tell him he's and ask him what he's like his website to do... His exact words "I want everything like Facebook but the site not to be called Facebook and the colors green. Can you please make this happen?"
FUCK YOU!6 -
No, I do not wish to work on your Scrum-managed project.
I do not wish to contribute to the Taylorism of my profession.
I do not wish to be an interchangeable cog in your software sausage machine.
I do not wish to be tracked by some pointless metrics like a call-centre worker.
I do not wish to bust my tight, cute ass to sprint after some idiotic management request that could have been factored in earlier.
I do not wish to obtain some piss-ant qualification that "authorises" me to do my job.
I do not wish to be party to your lie that technical debt will be avoided by refactoring---whatever the cost.
I do not wish to contribute to the death of software engineering to have it replaced by software development.
Agile? Sure. I can pick up the phone and talk to the client, users and fellow devs. After all, that's what it FUCKING MEANS. Communi-fucking-cation.
See that burndown chart? See your anus? Know what's happening next?
Fuck Scrum and every fucking bottom-feeder that is scamming a living by promoting it. You're killing this business.
Hugs and kisses,
Platypus15 -
So my client wants to stick with their current hosting provider (Bell) because the company is "big" and "won't go anywhere anytime soon." I just said, well okay it can't be that bad. Bell charges about 10x more and gives you about 10x less compared to other options, but it's not my money so whatever. Well, Bell has the absolute worst customer service. They have an online support form where I can type in my questions and they will call me within a day to help me. They called me during work hours and I missed the call, so they sent me an email to let me know I missed the call and gave me a number to call. I called and I might as well have called my dog because the support didn't even know what a .htaccess file is. I emailed them back and asked if they could forward my email to someone in the hosting department that could help (because the phone support I got was shit). I got a reply saying they "can't"... yup, they used the word "can't", they can't forward the email and that I would have to call. Is everyone at Bell a fucking dick chugging brainless pile of moldy-ass shit biscuits!? YOU CAN"T SEND AN EMAIL? Turns out they do have a dedicated hosting support email, let's hope the email I send ends up in front of someone at Bell who at least has a slight clue how to use a keyboard.3
-
Skype meeting with bosses be in the middle of the night and I'm drunk as hell.
Uh oh. This sure is fun and troublesome.
How can I be of your help, sir? (Hick)
Sure! I can (belched loudly) do that!
I'd be glad to have your help!
Went to the loo to the point, it's my chance to vomit secretly. Now's the chance to remove the toxin (my head is aching)... and felt so sad when all my food is wasted.undefined fuck my face is horrible thankful its not video call 5 half-glasses is enough drunk skype meeting14 -
So at work with the Macs we use, we have some guy come in after hours to service the Macs, and that means the security risk of leaving our passwords on our desks.
Not being a fan of this I tell my boss, he knows it's a risk and despite that he doesn't want this guy coming in while we're here.
Though my main problem is the Mac guy Steve is arrogant and thinks he's a know it all, and with the software I have on the Mac may end up deleting something important, I have git repo and all but I feel off just letting someone touch my computer without me being there.
I tell my boss about the software and stuff he just says contact Steve and tell him about it, to ignore the software and such, I say alright, I write up an email telling him not to touch the software listed and the folders of software documents (again it's all backed up).
No reply, I tell my boss and he says call him, I call him and he hangs up on me on the second ring!
Not sure if he's busy, but I left him a message, asking if he got my email, no reply and it's coming close to the end of the day (going to service Macs in the weekend)
I'm just not going to leave my info because if this guy can't check emails or even get back to someone why should I bother with this bullshit of risking my work.
From all the info I hear about him and my previous rants he's an arrogant prick who loves Macs.
Can't wait to leave this company, pretty sure leaving my password on my desk is a breach of our own security policy, and since 8-9 people are doing it, it's a major risk.
But he's friends with the CEO so apparently it's fuck our own security policy.11 -
I happen to be the only girl in my small dev team of 4 males plus me.
I'm freaking tired of hearing 'hey guys','how are you doing guys', 'what's the update guys' in every meeting/call when one of them is addressing the rest of us.
Yeah i know I/they can't do anything about it. I somehow grew numb to hearing it, but sometimes hearing it one thousand time in a single call is driving me crazy.
I once mentioned it to an a senior dev who happens to be the one using the g word the most during meeting.
Me: could you please stop saying guys all the time, I'm not a guy.
Him: what do you want me to say, 'hey guys and a girl?!'
Me: ... -_- (internally: seriously!!)
Uugh.23 -
It's about a guy that knows better.
I was working as a subcontractor on a bigger system. We (subs) were not allowed to deploy code, we had to wait for contractor to deploy.
One day I got an email that my code is bugged and that my feature is not working on production. I checked it on test env, everything was fine. Then I checked if the code I wrote was deployed. It was not.
I send an email explaining that if they deployed my code it would be working. Then I got a response. There was a bug in my code.
Another email. I asked how would they know? Do they have a test on their environment that failed?
No. There is one guy that READ my code and he said it should not work, so he will not deploy it. He was not a programmer, he was a business consultant responsible for the documentation.
His issue was that I used a function that was not in a class. So if the function is not declared it's obvious it will not work. I had to explain to him in another email, that you can use object of another class inside your class and then call a function, that is not in your class. It was the last time this guy blocked my deploy.
TL;DR, I had to explain a non-dev how object composition works in order to have my code deployed. Took four emails.4 -
Someone I know recommended me to Google... Not sure if I'm excited or scared if they call.
Not getting my hopes up though. 👀5 -
You can't keep wasting your time on people who do not know what the fuck they want. You could be way more time efficient with serious clients.
*After I have finally deployed the requested features*
Client: Why did it take you two weeks in the end? You said it would take you a couple days.
Me: Because you told me to use my imagination on half of the tasks and you kept wanting me to change what I had created, thus unnecessarily doubling the time it should have taken. Besides that probably the unclear communication and the fact that you rarely called me back after you told me to call you.
Client: So if I tell you, exactly, how I want it next time you'll be able to do it in a couple days?
Me: I'm not sure, that depends on what you want. Tell me, exactly, what you want.
Client: Oh it's not much, I'll let you do your thing for the most.
Me: I can't handle another request, sorry. *Ends call*4 -
My boss just asked me to participate in a conference call to help an external senior dev implement some stuff/tool into our website.
My boss suspects that he doesn't even know Git...
Let's see how that whole thing will turn out.
My boss told me that he looked at his code and it already looks like an abomination of PHP...
It is enough that my boss usually writes shitty spaghetty code.
I will not sleep well this night.1 -
Not on call. 2 hours of sleep, get a call. Ask if primary on call got called... all my coworkers are fixing shit. Why is everything down? I'm tired and need my sleep.2
-
Peopleee of devRant!
It's been a year, I missed the date
I got to know lots of people, it has been an interesting year... certainly
Thanks anyways
To every ++er, to the people I now call my friends
I'm still a student at uni, still bad at stuff, still an embarrassing mess, it is best to not mind me hehe7 -
I might actually quit. I'm within weeks (Army-stupidity pending) of working remote and not having to interact with my boss face to face, and I might quit.
2 week long call, everything I suggested was turned down/dismissed by him. Turns out, the second thing I suggested may have resolved the issue... After he decided he was going to take over the call.
While I was on the call, he ran the coffee maker, the kettle, banged his dishes around in the metal sink, and honestly tried to create as much noise as humanly possible, as he does for all my calls. I have multiple signs up requesting people be considerate.
He works for a different company, so I can't call HR, and I'm at the end of my patience.3 -
Reading books, not sure if you can even call it a non-dev activity since it is essential in my opinion but reading improves my programming skills everyday!
-
client : show website
me: sir server is down
client : what? I don't know,I want to see my website.
me: sir try to understand it is not my issue
client *call cut*
fucking asshole -_-1 -
My manager wonders why I don't respond to people in a timely fashion.
I'm watching 83 Slack channels and private messages, I get 45 emails an hour, I'm on-call, and I have 125 servers to monitor.
Number of Jira tickets I received in the last 3 days? One single fucking ticket.
Open a damn ticket and I'll shove you to the bottom of the backlog, just like everybody else... I mean, I'll be able to track your request and not loose it.7 -
Client : I am unable to download data from your sever for last 10 days.
Me : Sir, we are sorry to hear that. We are doing some maintenances on our server from this morning today. We request you to call back us in next 4 hours.
Client : But i am facing this problem for last 10 days.
Me: Sir, i heard you. As maintenance is going on it will not be possible to download data this time.
Client: From when this maintenance is going on?
Me: from this morning sir.
Client : but i am facing this probolem for last 10 days.
Me: Sir, you are not understanding it, or may be i am failing to describe the situation to you...
Client: Listen, you guys are incapable. Only knows to make excuse.
Me: Sir..
Client: Sorry to say, i am not Happy with your support. Let me talk to your senior tech guy.
Me : Sir, your problem will be solved in next 4 hours. We will call you as soon as our server went online.
Client: *.....*
It took me 20 minutes to finally make him understand the situation.
Client: Why did not you said that earlier? You guys will have all the time but i do not. Anyway.
He hangs the phone.
My ears are burning man...9 -
Went to the ATM to get some cash.. entered an amount of 800 INR and to my surprise got an error saying "Your account does not have sufficient funds for this transaction" .. Instantly thought that my account has somehow been compromised.. checked the bank app and found out that I everything was normal..
As it turns out the ATM machine did not have 500 or 100 INR notes, thus it could not dispense my requested amount..
Now that's what we call a "Good" error handling..4 -
Not entirely dev related but the year that the mass surveillance companies go away (Google, Facebook (and WhatsApp, Instagram etc), Microsoft and a few others), I'll call that the best fucking year ever.
I hope I'll get to experience that in my lifetime!5 -
Got a call from a recruiter today
Recruiter: I'm trying to fill a full stack position in Charlotte.
Me: not interested
R: why
M: I hate NC
R: what can I do to make you reconsider
M: I want 120k
R: Ok, well please pass this opportunity along if you know someone who is looking
I *actually* just moved from there.
Guess someone didn't read my job history.
Convo was seriously less than a minute.9 -
I started recently working for a big company, and when I say big, I mean really BIG.
Well, my colleagues are from different parts of the world, of course some names are harder to pronounce, so, let's say your name is 'Yagarishmakeshin', well, sometimes is easier(and I used to think friendly) to call you by a shorter name, for this example let's say 'Yag', you know, like Apu form the Simpsons, which is normal I think, people use to call me always by shorter names too and is fine.
Well, yesterday I received a complain from HR saying some people complain about this, it turns out this is offensive or degradating; I was also warned about not calling a girl 'girl', example:
- random girl at my team - So, I created this routine which is very effective and provides good performance
- me - Awesome girl, very cool
Well, Someone complain I call them 'girl' and is not fine.
I cannot tell you how frustrated I feel about this, is like, if you feel uncomfortable with a short name, just say it to me, something like 'Hey I prefer you call me by my full name' or something like that, but nah, you prefer to raise a complain like if I were a fucking predator or something; Also, I cannot retaliate or mention the topic, I need to change and pretend nothing happened.
Fuck you big corporations, and fuck you skinny stupid bitch15 -
I had a zoom meeting with a new company who came looking for ME. I did NOT look for them. I already have a job (but they pay 3-4x more than my current job).
It went well. How the fuck was this a technical interview. Guy only asked me what ive worked on so far by now. Nothing technical n shit
At the end
Hr asked me how much bands i want 💰💰💰(here we fucking go again)
I had to stall it and avoid question. The guy started rolling his eyes and turned off his webcam. The fuck is your fucking problem Bitch?
Then she said we cant move to the next 76th interview unless i say range or minimum. I don't give a fuck anymore. I said my minimum
She started writing it down and, i have never in my life seen someone disconnect a zoom call after that.
Literally hr was saying Thank u for taking the time to join the interview, the guy also said thanks, i started saying thank you for your time an- they fucking disconnected the fucking call. In the middle of my fucking sentence. I did not manage to finish my fucking sentence from how fast they disconnected.
NOW I'LL ASK FOR DOUBLE OR NOTHING AT THE END INTERVIEW DUE TO THIS BEHAVIOR. GET FUCKED4 -
Not sure why I still call my smartphone a phone at all. I rarely talk on it. It's a microcomputer with a phone app. I'm really surprised my toddler even knows to put it up to his head and pretend talk.3
-
The most awaited "Trivia Bot" is here, asks technical trivia on various topics, uses quizapi.io,
Source Code: https://gist.github.com/theabbie/...
You know it's written in JS, if it fucks up, not my fault.
To use, call, @trivia
Gives a question and atmost 5 options, reply with option ID.
Demo in Comments.302 -
My Lazy Habits:
1. Not testing my own code thoroughly... cuz fuck that. That's the tester's/QA's job.
2. I create slack commands to get certain things done, so I dont have to get up and open my laptop each time I receive a ticket.
3. Ask more time for development that I actually need so I can fit in couple naps here and there.
4. Falsely claiming that I am busy when someone invites me over meet or a phone call. Like just text me.
5. Factoring my laziness in when I design features LOL.1 -
I just got a call from the UK. When 7 picked up, the lady said "Hello Edwin, how are you?". I never replied and just hung up.
I don't know how the fuck she got my number and name right? I know my name is public but my phone number is not.17 -
Well I just had a breakdown a few hours ago.. For a too calm guy like me it's really rare, but also not surprising. I have my third deadline in a row, haven't really seen people over the last month. Thanks guys for helping me survive socially during this month, I'm a very social guy usually, so I really needed that.
Apart from that, last time I was hopeful about my schedule and sent it to my advisor she called me the day after shouting that it's not realistic and I'll never be done on time. I could have worked harder on February, that's true, but for fuck sake she ruined all of my motivation in a 10 minute call.
I wish I liked what I'm doing. I wish people I work with would have appreciated what I'm doing and encourage me. I wish I was 2 weeks to the future when I have not even a slight thing to worry about.
Get me outta here 😩3 -
Working for a company where the coworkers working 24/7 and the boss (ceo) expect me to do the same, even working on weekends.
But when i mentioned I have life distinctly personal and working life. But no, boss wouldn’t care much about my life anyway.
I got call names for being a not team player, not committed much , a thief (“ I paid you money but you didn’t work 24/7”) and they even claimed I don’t have heart to work.
It affect my personal so much that I can’t be happy even on the weekends. I got perturbed sleeps. Keep thinking of working .
Obviously they played well on guilt tripping me.8 -
“Hey - just calling you to give you an update”
Great - sorry can you refresh my memory what was this for?
“So I was about to put you through for a client but they’re no longer accepting CVs so just to update you that’s not happening”
Sorry, what was the client again?
“Oh I can’t say, but they’re no longer accepting CVs”
“...Thanks, goodbye.”
*So you call me to tell me that you can’t give my details to a client that you can’t disclosure....get off my line 🤬😡🤬*3 -
Me: so, what are you doing as a developer?
Him: I am full-stack developer, basically ROR...
Me:...! Sorry, do you mean R&D, research and development? Or you mean Aroura DB?
Hi: no man, I am expert in ROR! You can not call your self developer in our days without knowing the on demand technologies!
Me:... Sorry dude, can you please tell me what is ROR, I don't want to lose my title as a developer!!!?
Him: OK, we call Ruby On Rails as ROR.
Me: ~¢°¤”©°$®”«2 -
I think I just blew my own mind here.
Look at this:
Class SomeClass
{
_call($functionName, $arguments)
{
return call_user_func(array('SomeClass','uselessMethod'), 'method');
}
method($foo)
{
return new Adapter($foo)->execute($this);
}
uselessMethod()
{
return $this->method(__FUNCTION__);
}
}
so __FUNCTION__ resolves to
Caller:
You can run that code, whether you comment out uselessMethod, or not.
Adapter is a function that looks for what class to call depending on a database value
and execute the call.
So api basically uses a chain call to do stuff like this in controllers, here's how
I call the above:
$someObject = (new Class($object))->uselessMethod()->doSomething()->doSomethingElse();
But like, eventually my code matured to where all those methods in the chain call have the same one line return that calls my adapter to find the logic to run.
So, basically, I can now have a class with headless function calls that calls a directory of other classes, that are all defined in a contract somewhere. So as long as those classes
all adhere to the contract, it will never return an error.
I can't think of any reason to do this, other than my setup, and I have a sneaky feeling,
as dirty as this trick is, that there's a bad reason my code has come to being able to do this.
Maybe wrong strategy pattern from the beginning?
I'm sure it'll come to me like 3 days from now..3 -
And I thought dealing with recruiters couldn't get worse..
Applied for a job, get a call back a short while later. Recruiter guy has zero details about the job, but needs some background info. Then says he needs a few more things, it'll come in an email. Calls me 5 minutes later asking why I haven't replied yet, told him im not home.
Get home, check my mail.. please send full address, social security number and a copy of both sides of my photo ID.
Nooooooooooooope. Email back, say no can do.. no replies, job listing deleted a few hours later.2 -
I am at the lowest point of my mental health. Lol
I hope it doesn't get any lower than this because I have reached my breaking point.
I have nobody to talk to. I don't want to be a cry baby, nagging and whining all the time.
My friends here Jason (from Zurich and not Australia) and Rutee07 were in similar position when I last spoke to them here. I wonder what happened to them!
Shall I call in for yet another superficial therapy session? Or shall I just wait for the feeling to pass and continue being busy?20 -
Im on vacation and my boss is terrorising my phone number. Having answered after the 5 th call he claims I’m not on vacation until i sent out a handover to all my colleagues. Fuck this shit I’m so done with them17
-
I practice what I call "Aggressive Oriented Programming" or AOP.
Whenever I'm investigating a bad bug, working on a project that I really hate, or dealing with messy code written by a messy developer, I often find myself resorting to an [internal] state of violence.
It's not like I scream and smash my screen (although sometimes I want to). It usually consists of a few git blames and some curse words in print statements for debugging. This is just my way to vent.5 -
I missed 25 on call alerts over night.
Me and my wife did not budge. Look at me call history and I cleared my voicemail at 4am... No recollection of that at all.
Oh well!5 -
So I'm doing some OpenGL stuff in C++, for debugging I've created a macro that basically injects my error check code after every OpenGL API call. Basically I don't want any of the code in release builds but I want it to be in debug. Also it needs to be usable inline and accept any GL function return type. From what I can tell I've satisfied all requirements by making the macro generate a generic lambda that returns the original function call result but also creates a stack object that uses the scope to force my error check after the return statement by using the destructor.
Basically I can do:
Log(gl(GetString(...));
gl(DeleteShader(...));
Etc where the GL call can be a function parameter or not.
So my question is, is the code shown in the picture the best way to achieve my goals while providing the behaviour im going for?13 -
So this phallus decided to make my day a night mare, I coded the Interface in separate class for each distinct services, He just told me to re write it to one class, before he don't understand it.
I wrote documentation, he said it is not professional. and now the fucking codes are containing redundancies.
For instance if he use my method, all he need is call my function once, and call it everywhere. But now the code is messy as fuck, calling the same thing over and over again which can be done by separate it to a function once, and reuse it.4 -
I see a lot of people with shitty interactions with recruiters, but I have the chance to work with one to get into what I want to do (net ops incident response) if I call this recruiter.
Backstory: friend applied for a position, got offered this morning (not going through a recruiter) AS recruiter called him for another position within same company. Friend explained situation, but said someone (me) might call recruiter to talk.
Job would increase salary by minimum of 25% and is much closer to what I want to do. Even if I'm still on call, it's a larger team and I'm interested in the stuff.
How do I not get screwed by recruiter? And am I am ass for applying when I know it's < 1 year and I'd be leaving my team down 2 people (so at half capacity)? And do I care?5 -
DXB (airport)'s WiFi doesn't let you call through whatsapp or telegram or even discord. It also does not let you send a whatsapp voice message, which has me very puzzled.
And all I wanted to do was to call my mom. ☹️
(I might also be running a slight fever, which makes me very emotional and sensitive)10 -
What a sad and frustrating day!
I got a call from recruiter. I told him that I'm not actively looking for change. But he requested for 2 mins to listen. He started telling about his company, how great it is, tech stack, perks, salary etc. He is telling everything but not company name, I waited patiently and asked what's the pay I can expect. The number blew my mind, it's nearly double to my current pay. Then...
Me: that sounds amazing, which company is this, and where is it?
Him: it is <my company name> and located at <my current location, same campus>
Me: .....
Him: so, what do you think?
Me: .... I need some time. Let me update my LinkedIn profile first and then, i will get back to you.
Him: sounds wonderful, will call back by Monday. <Call disconnected>
Me: <inside my head> @$_-$#(/+&_#
This in my 10th year in this company, some one kill me please.5 -
Fucking fuck you 'executive' sales director.
You come into my office when I'm not here, and then force people to prioritise your shitty fucking customer above a high priority one that I need to go to. I get phoned and told, "You will go there".
Basically, he just prioritised a shitty fucking issue of 3 users over a high priority SLA customer of 140 users.
Getting shat out as I speak about why the high priority is not being done (I need to do DR there, because their server crashed).
Basically said - I am fucked. I either choose to go to the SLA call and then the 'director' fucking loses his shit and hits me, or I go to the call and the MD loses his shit and fucks me up (again).
Fuck this.
Fuck.
Time to get to work! -
So I just got off of a teams call which I suffered the classic BSOD part way through, a colleague tells me that the entire time I was disconnected waiting for my laptop to restart, my team's account was broadcasting a super loud jackhammer style racket to everyone else in the call 🤦🏼♂️ and of course nobody knew how to mute me so they sat in 3 minutes of what can only be described as noise 😂😂
I'm not sure whether to feel embarrassed to have caused the issue or to be annoyed that the software does something so random while I'm not even in the call or with a powered on laptop 🙈4 -
Most horrific interview process I had gone through was by the CMMI level 5 company.
They had asked common Java questions & then after an interview they had not called back.
Suddenly, after a year I had got a call from them, I had barely remembered that past interview & still they had reminded me about the same.
Then they had said that that I got selected & offered me 10% less salary than I demanded a year back.
When I had asked why I had been offered less salary than even my current salary?
Then they had said they were CMMI level 5 company, so based on that in my next job after joining their company, I could demand more salary.
I had said them that I will reply after a year & had cut the call.
I think I did the correct thing 😎.1 -
I officially got a call that i start a job from 15th december
That's my first job after graduating with a computer science degree, and it took exactly 421 days later.
This is depressing and sad. Im not even interested in starting a job. I hoped they will reject me just like the other 10,468 jobs. Im not used to getting accepted.
I have to finish my side project within these two weeks asap rn7 -
Finished my on call rotation. Coworker is still on a call for 10 hours. She's not on call. I might be getting on this call. For the sake of the idiots who didn't listen and broke it worse, I really hope I don't have to take over for her. I might get fired tonight...5
-
Call centre manager was made VP of my tech company. Is now directing the programming department.
Yesterday she spent 30 minutes looking through Excel files in an attempt to prove me wrong. Literally found nothing, with 3 other people in the meeting.
Repeatedly told everyone she was "not crazy" in her failed attempt to throw me under the bus.
I love coding, but these human interactions are going to give me a heart attack.3 -
Had a conference call and one of the guys said something along the lines of "I can handle the load (ticket load)" didn't even thought about it my mouth instinctively reacted with "that's what she said".
A couple of guys laughed but the other few just "wooooow"ed like if I had thrown a 9/11 joke.
This is not a rant perse, just a reminder that if I ever launch my own startup I shall look to hire "joke sensitive" people to make my scrum meetings as awkward as possible.4 -
A recruiter landed in my LinkedIn inbox, I took pity and graciously provided my phone number so they could call me and beg me to leave my current job to join their company.. aaaaaand they don't call at the agreed upon time. Mate, you wanted me, not the other way around? 🤷🤭8
-
One thing I hate about WinForms:
"do not modify the contents of this method with the code editor."
How the phook do I add eventhandlers without adding them in the code? By some mysterious ways in the so called "designer"? Click and drag? Wearing a tie and talking to the computer? Making a phone call to Microsoft? Immersing into VR and ordering an event handler from a virtual store?
No, I've always just typed whatever I want to achieve and I'm going to do so whatever those know-it-all comments say in the auto-generated code.
You can call me a conservative old fart, but nothing beats writing my own code.6 -
Bureaucracy is the biggest impediment to progress.
Instead of putting a brick wall in front of you by saying "The PO said that you created a bug", learn how to communicate and have a horizontal hierarchy, for fuck's sake.
Even if all my tests passed, they still throw other bugs in my face and call it my fault. Fantastic. I love Scrum. This is not Scrum, this is abusing and not respecting Scrum.
Stupid rules, stupid people.1 -
Sent a cv to a company because facebook threw their ad at my face and i said why not. They emailed me that they would call me today. I dont have a phone. Its not fucking 2007. Call me on matrix or telegram or even skype ffs.19
-
First off, what do you mean by ´people like me´?
Do I look like an outer-space creature to you when you look at my profile? Or are you looking for a do-not-feed sign at the side of my wooden fence?
What even, .. I'm human, like you, you moron with a missing 'sapien'.
It's kinda ironic, as you can't even abide the maximum length your message has, which you speak of. Therefore I reckon you lost the second 'sapien' too.
Yes, now you may call me "people", and yourself... well you're mute. You monkey.
Just rambling. /ignored6 -
So, I am currently seeking opportunities at other companies. I randomly got a call on Thursday around 12pm from an unknown number and I was not able to take that call as I was in a meeting. Later on, after looking up that number on Truecaller, I found out that it’s a recruiter from a US-based firm that I had applied to earlier. I immediately tried to call that person again but she was not able to talk as she was in another meeting. I tried texting the recruiter asking for her availability but she didn’t respond. I called again and this time she got annoyed at me, saying that she will call me back if needed. Now, on the weekend I again tried to message her, asking when she is free for a conversation, she is acting high and mighty, saying that she will call me when we (the company) have interviews again (hinting that I have missed the opportunity and it’s my fault). Her passive-aggressive attitude seems to be coming because I didn’t take her earlier call— I did not deliberately avoid her call, I was in another meeting. I was not given any intimation that she is going to call me— let alone on a weekday at 12pm. My current company expects a high-level of professionalism and I intend to show the same level of professionalism in any future companies that I work with. This kind of dehumanization (mainly due to a power imbalance in top-down heirarchical structure) is why big companies have hard time retaining workers these days. And this company was not Google/Apple or anything remotely in the same league. So I seemed to have dodged a bullet there.4
-
Something is really fucking wrong with people in my company. They fucking calling me after 5PM on Friday when the server is down. What part of my role you fuckers don't understand. I'm not a Network Engineer and I don't have fucking access to the fucking server.
Call the fucking Network Engineer. If his not picking up his phone then that's his fucking problem not mine.
(Bang the Table) Fuck this shit4 -
!Rant
Do you guys have a idea how I can call my new snippet manager application? The application allows you to save code and URLs to view Inside of the application. Also the application is highly customizable supporting 42 coding Languages and over 42 Themes. Currently its named: "SNIPR". But i would like a Name thats not directly connected to the application and what it does. Maybe you guys have some ideas? Because im not that creative😀😀👌
This is a example of the main ui using the dark theme26 -
I own my grandfather's Victorinox Swiss Army Knife, probably from the eighties. I absolutely love it — it's just like the standard Unix toolkit. Minimalist, multi-purpose, efficient. This is what I have in my knife:
1. Two blades. I call them master (yes) and slave
2. Corkscrew. I call it "ed".
3. Hole puncher, but not just any hole puncher. Mine has an angular sharp edge to carve holes instead of just punching them. Super efficient for wood, plastic and thick fabric. It also has a hole so it can be used as a needle. I call it "vi".
4. Bottle opener which is also a screwdriver. I call it "more".
5. Can opener. This is my favorite one.
It can help you open just about anything. Any type of cans, closed pistachio nuts, oysters, your barely legal girlfriend's virginity — anything. When I eat pistachios, I'm holding my Victorinox in my hand opening tough ones with the speed of rm -rf ripping through your files. Oh, and it's also another screwdriver. I call it "cat".
But let's take a look at modern Victorinox. Maybe it's better? No, not at all. It's totally metrosexual featuring nail files, nail clippers, nail scissors and a flash drive (not even a good one).
Newer doesn't always mean cooler.
(I have the exact same one, photo from the internet because I'm too lazy)19 -
It all started when I was driving and wasn’t paying attention to the road bc I was trying to think of a solution to a coding issue when all the sudden a deer jumps in front of my car! My car is smashed and I call road service. They send someone out and as I wait I decide to do a little coding while in the middle of the woods with my laptop. I sit down and the same deer (remarkably un phased) charges me and kicks my laptop like a football. I suffered not one but two impacts from coding...4
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Not at my current dev job, but I worked for a place that had us be On-call and if someone called we would all get an email telling us who was complaining, where the site was, the problem, etc.
This service was a 24/7 service.
Anyways one of my first times on call I definitely slept through like 12 emails throughout the night, and when I woke up the next morning I saw that the owner of the company had taken all 12 and resolved the issues.
I thought I was a goner for sure. -
Overheard: "I'll need to get in touch with my Infrastructure Architecture Innovation Team"
😂🤣😅😂🤣😅
Why not just call them team buzzwords. Omg.3 -
Oh please it's weekend. Don't call me or message me, especially if it's not urgent 😡 My contract doesn't include selling my soul.3
-
I was eating my oats happily when, suddenly, Boss called because clients complained data duplication in reports, and asked why I removed DISTINCT in the query. So, I stopped eating and obliged to answer the call because I so loved my work :) <3
How is it my fault now, when the QA just told me to make the data transparent and to not display them distinctly by name?3 -
To provide excellent customer service and provide extra services, we collect your personal information.
Bullshit. You're not using my personal information for customer service, otherwise your call center wouldn't suck so badly.3 -
I think I’ve applied to 5 jobs that show up as “remote” now only to get halfway through a screening call and find out “oh, we’re looking for people in Albuquerque”.
Are my expectations out of whack? If you’re looking for someone in your city, you’re not looking for someone remote. You’re looking for a local worker who just has an office that’s not on your balance sheet.
Is it semantics?
Am *I* the bastard?5 -
Rant/story
Ok, I've always respected my PM and took everything on me, but since a while I start getting bored at work and realised many wrong things with the company and management in general.
So, brief contextual situation for you guys, I used to be very shy, unconfident and submissive. That was 2 years ago. Now am much more confident and got my own techniques in managing my constant "in the moon"-mind and relational discussions with colleagues. No more stuttering and am now answering on the spot and focussed on the discussion.
So I was having a nice day extinguishing fires on our website, this evening my PM stressly-rushed into my office (which I share with 2 other colleagues), and pressured me into giving a phone call to some developer for a situation clarification: a Json endpoints seems to truncate text after some characters.
Just came back from the loo (not sorry for the details), had my thoughts about something else, as usual, and I was just like "chill, let me get my mind together and prepare myself to be on point for this phone call". Told her I need a few seconds and she was like "now now now" knowing me I'm a bit laid-back.
Grabbed the phone, saw she was laughing (always laughs whatever I do, I must be very funny) and went talking about me to my colleague (not backstabbing but like "I don't get why he needs to get prepped for a phone call"). I managed the phone call like a boss - like usual since I got more confident -, my pm left, I finished the call, went to her to tell her my conclusions on our issue, asked me if I checked the contract with our CMS company.
Told her nope, the Json is compatible with our DB-manager's API.
She coldly answered "right, will do it myself then", I was like ok, I know you won't do it, I'll get it done.
In 15 minutes I found the contract, notified her, analyzed it, and wrote a technical email to support.
Seriously, stop taking me for some retarded person and let me breathe
Huh.2 -
All these super expensive and fancy enterprise tools. CloudWatch, AppDynamics, Grafana, Splunk and whatnot. Spent a month trying to figure out why the fuck the app does not perform well.
Took 1 day with tcpdump, awk and gnu utils to figure out why.
Should anyone need a tcpdump analyzer -- try my awk script. Shows response times of each network call w/o impacting app performance :)
https://gist.github.com/netikras/...14 -
I love linters and all. They’re great for maintaining good practice. But sometimes they’re a little too aggressive, and when the rules are being imported from elsewhere, I am not sure how to temporarily disable them.
This is especially frustrating when the linter decides it will break your shit instantly, so I found it easier to just call a method and remove it when the functionality is built.
Right now there’s at least 4 “this.stopBitchingAbout([all, the, things])” in my code.11 -
The best way to get an interview call is through referrals.
Recruiters are lazy. They don't want to sift through resumes coming from sites like LinkedIn. Referrals are usually better quality.
I'm not saying this. My recruiter friend is.2 -
Adventures with house IT
I'm currently experimenting with PowerShell but my scripts won't run even though I've got every local permission. The error message indicates it's a GPO problem.
"No problem" le me thinks and calls IT hotline.
After 2 incompetent and unprofessional technicians i've still got no solution. I'm waiting for the second tech to call back because he "needed some time to get to know PowerShell" (he is a trained and certified SysAdmin).
During my call he couldn't decide if it was a GPO problem or not.
And this is just one story of their incompetence...8 -
A cousin: Hey, You're a programmer, right?
Me: Yeah, what do you need?
Him: My smart washing machine is not working, can you fix it for me?
Me: Well.. call the company.
Him: How can you call yourself a programmer? You didn't even know how to reconfigure my cable receiver yesterday!..
Me: .... (WTF internally).10 -
Just started using the Dropbox API. Want to do a simple directory listing of my files. Sends HTTP GET request at https://api.dropboxapi.com/2/files/....
"Error in call to API function "files/list_folder": Your request's HTTP request method is "GET". This function only accepts the HTTP request method "POST"."
What. The. Fuck. Dropbox.
HTTP POST is for creating a new instance of a resource. HTTP GET is for reading. GET guarantees server state is not changed while POST does not. I want to fucking list a directory, not put stuff in it.1 -
Just had a call to follow up a job aplication that was sent in, he is very confident that we need to arrange an interview and wanted to let me know he couldn't do this week. FUCK OFF YOU FUCKTARD, I wouldn't wipe my arse with your aplication your waisting my fucking time with bullshit crap like this in a job application! Your not going to get the job dick head! You have zero fucking experience or any ability to do the job!
Think it's beer time 🍺4 -
1) Submitted my CV
2) Got an email to schedule a phone interview for the next week, I gave ~5 appiointments on the next week that were good for me
3) Next week passed, no answer to my E-mail, I asked in a mail, what happend
4) Got reply, that we should schedule the phone interview for the next week
5) We aggreed, in the appointment, they did not call me
6) I asked in a mail, what has happened
7) We aggreed in a new appointment
8) This time they called me, after a short conversation I was told, that I they send me task as homework right after the phone call and I will have to do it in one week
9) They did not send it
10) Next day I asked, whats going on
11) They sent me the task, and said that I can ask them, if have queations
12) For me it was not clear, if I was allowed to use frameworks for the task, so I asked it
13) I neveg got reply and did not ping for the 4th time
This was the most annoying and ridiculous recruiting process I had to deal with. It was just a waste of time.1 -
Uncle gives me a call one day - "hey aren't you a computer science graduate? Can you fix my computer for me it does not open Internet Explorer"
Me - 😖😡3 -
Is it real that github are changing master to main? Does this mean I need to call my dungeon master main now? She’s not going to be happy...6
-
What the fuck is clients' problem? This woman comes to me after one of the last bids I saved and spent on her stupid task! She asked me to come on skype and I said I didn't have the ID and maybe we can go ahead with a phone call or whatsapp call or even Google hangout! She stopped responding to my messages when I had sent her 3 options! It's not like I was willing to back out but hey, I DON'T FUCKING USE SKYPE ANYMORE! What a waste of my precious last but one bid!15
-
Freelance Headhunters...
No idea where they got my name and the number of my work phone...
- they do not give a damn and call me 1045 am to discuss "EXCITING BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES™"
- they are sure I am having a case of stockholm syndrome, because I could NEVER be satisfied in my current employment
- they call every other day with a new number and start the same process again
How fucking dense can people get?11 -
Music is not always a foreground activity.
Spotify... why don't you have a volume slider specifically for your output on my phone..?
Why do I need to turn ALL non-call volume down to just turn the music down.
Sometimes I want to play games with music but I don't want the music to be totally loud.
Sometimes I wanna do WHATEVER at full volume with some music in the background.
But I just... can't
What the fuck.4 -
Working on a new payment gateway for one of my customers, and it turns out that instead of just specifying the parameters for what to include in the API call they want you to use their drop-in module for it...which is still written in PHP 4 and hasn't been updated since 2011. Also turns out that they only accept data formatted in XML.
Not insurmountable, but more than I feel like dealing with right this moment...7 -
In my first place there was a guy, we'll call him S.
So S. was not very popular, he had an intimidating look all the time, wore workout dryfit clothes and seldomly smelt like he didn't take a shower in quite a long time. He has an iOS developer on my team. He was blazingly smart and called every code he saw garbage. Nice guy indeed :)
He was a fine guy after you got to know him and get accustomed to his weirdness... Smelly nonetheless :)2 -
Using Zoom to share my screen so my colleague can use his Skype Business to record the Zoom window so that the other people can see my screen and I can call in using my phone
All because Linux does not have skype business :p9 -
I don’t know if I would call it a quirk of the language or serious abuse of it :P
But I managed to get a null ref exception when comparing a local int variable to an int parameter to the same function in C#.
Since a local or parameter of type in cannot be null and I compared the variables them self and dud not try to access any property on them (and no extension method or implicit case or similar) my first thought, along with all colleagues that chipped in to help, was that this should not be possible.
Turns out the method was called through reflection and in that part it injected null as the base object to call the method on.
Since local variables actually are referenced through the parent object this was what was causing the null ref.
That took some time to figure out.4 -
// example.json
{ "hasCustomerAgreedToTermsAndConditions": no }
Slightly irritated by my IDEs warning, I squinted back at my code. It took me a second too long to spot my mistake. First, I was baffeld at my own incompetence. Then I grew defensive about it. "Why not?!" I thought. "Less typing, so efficient, so much time saved, so wow!"
I realized at that moment, that it was probably best to call it a day and go to bed.
And so I did.3 -
It’s late, and stupid RSpec has decided to only mock calls to a particular method in some specs but not in others.
`allow(object).to receive(:method).with(resource_arg).and_return(“some\ntext”)`
Works in a few specs, but not the rest. Why? Who the fuck knows. Probably some shared state between specs that isn’t supposed to happen.
HAHA JUST KIDDING
After refactoring my specs to use unique ‘resource’ names for each call because I’ve had shared state issues before.
and after refactoring my model code to remove a lot of now-unused dependency injection (because maybe it was mocking a different object than got passed in?)
Guess what?
When creating my mock objects, I forgot to link them together. That’s it. A 14-character change. And suddenly they all pass.
Asdjklfajg.
Time for bed.3 -
So I had an interview with Amazon, I had 2 technical rounds and 2 managerial rounds. Now I am waiting for the HR to call, this guy is not picking up the call or replying to my emails. Its almost 3 days now and I am FREAKING OUT!!
How difficult is it to tell the candidate that the application is in progress/accepted or you have been rejected!!!
HR PEOPLE :(10 -
Call me crazy all you want, but I love my tangled mess of cords
Yeah yeah, I know, I know, wouldn't I just love a cordless setup and workspace ...
NO
Bluetooth devices are at best unreliable and at worst don't even work with Linux
I want to just be able to plug my shit in and work, not wait for everything to sync and hope I don't have connectivity issues
Call it living in the past all you want, I don't care. I love my cords
Fuck you and your bluetooth shit2 -
HELLO ITS ME RECRUITER. I SEE THAT YOU ARE CURRENTLY NOT LOOKING FOR A JOB, SO, MY COMPANY IS CURRENTLY LOOKING FOR NEW TALENT AND WAS WONDERING IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO SET UP A CALL.
I would kill to be in this situation a couple of years ago but seriously. I'm not looking. 😐2 -
RANT
We use Exact for our time sheets/hour tracking. How it's supposed to work:
-Manager plans my hours in Exact.
- I work those hours on the given projects
== All fine till here ==
But then ... there is a button (don't know the correct translation) "realise" which books the planned hours for me. So I don't have to do it manually.
This simply didn't work!! No one seem to know why not... Not even the guys at Exact.
Since it's web based I opened the developers window and looked for the call behind the button. You would think it would be at least an Ajax call thingy (I'm not completely into JS)
Turns out it's a readable JS function!
It doesn't stop there... It first makes all calculations on what to display, at last, at the fucking end, it checks a setting whether to proceed the booking or not!!!!
So I found and switched the setting and tried the button again.... Now it fucking works...
No fucking way I am going to tell Exact what the problem is 😫2 -
So I got a telephone interview for a job that a recruiter found for me. Call went well, comes to the development test. Small application in ruby on rails, haven't used it in about 2-3 years so a tad rusty. Completed the test under two days (was given until Friday) not too bad if I say so myself. It's for a junior position anyway so I'll assume they wouldn't mind giving me a refresher to help jog my memory.
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My JS app can crash IE11. Totally reproducable.
Had a fun debugging session to find out how this is triggered. Happens inside a deeply recursive call in a library I'm using which redraws the DOM.
Found a hacky workaround to avoid that as I see no real solution. It's not like I'm responsible for fixing IE. These are the days where I'm happy I'm mainly a backend dev...4 -
I got a call from a recruiter yesterday. The employer wants to get me in for an interview. It's for a fairly big company and I'm beginning to feel really nervous. I hate the place I'm at and I need this job. Not just for money but also to retain my sanity.
The interview is with a development manager, I wonder what kind of questions he/she will ask. Ahhhh how do I prepare for the unknown? 😱10 -
If any lecturer in my department discovers you are very fast in typing, the lecturer will turn you to a typing slave.
Lecturer: Just type, I will give you something
( 2 weeks later nothing )
Lecturer sees you in class, he ignores you.
(After graduation)
Lecturer sees you
Lecturer: Congratulations Mr. ***. The department is going to miss your fast typing, but i might call you on occasions to type for me. Will you come
Me: Sure Sir
MY MIND: STUPID FUCKING OLD FAG ASSHOLE, I HOPE YOU DIE A SORROWFUL DEATH, GREEDY FUCKING BASTARDS, AM NOT YOUR SLAVE, I WILL BLACKLIST YOUR NUMBER. BASTARD3 -
"Hello, this is Raja C******b. The purpose of this call is not a sales call. I would like to send you a free podcast examining <blah blah blah> and its impact on <blah blah blah>. I have your email address on file. May I send this to you?"
"No. Because this is not free, since my time is money. And also because this IS a sales call."
"It is not a sales call, sir. We would like to send you a free podcast..."
"... that will try to sell me something."
"No, sir. It is a free podcast examining..."
"...Something that will try to convince me to purchase a product or service."
"Ok, yes."
"Ok, bye."3 -
Ugh why is my area so shit for work!
Plenty of work if your a butcher or teacher but can't find anything in the field of IT, not even a bloody computer salesman or call centre position, really shitting me!7 -
We are switching to an infinite scroll mode for our app. I told the backend dev in my project (we're just 2 people) I need an API to get more than one post at once.
He told me to use a loop to call the old URL 15 times.
...Not sure if stupid or just too lazy4 -
once upon a time I went on vacation.
It was for 5 days and I went to Leh-Ladakh with my family. (Me, My big bro and my parents.)
It's a beautiful and cold place. Snow and High Mountain and no phone call from anyone.
It was supposed to be no call. But on the 3 days, I got a call from my junior and he said to me that server is not working and it's giving 404 error.
So I told him to go to Cpanel (It was client's server). After 1 hour I got a call back from him and he was not able to fix it.
So I had to open the Cpanel in my Galaxy Note 8, Open file manager, go through all the files and logs and fix it code in 2 or 3 files.
It took 4 hours to fix the problem. But that day I understood the value of my Note 8 and its big screen. Thank you, Samsung.
Note: The lake in the photo is Pangong Lake/5 -
Earphones on.
Notifications off.
A boss who is the most inefficient boss ever. No, yours is not, mine is, trust me.
In the middle of coding, never in the zone for obvious reasons. A workmate wants me to call him to discuss stuff as he is working from home, which I wish I were.
I keep coding and decide to call him later.
My boss interrupts me again to TELL ME IF I CAN CALL MY WORKMATE.
Whyyyyyy
FML. -
In my previous job, the head of tech was a bully and my project manager had an affair and probably sex at work with him after I rejected her attentions. They both played against me at work. Not to talk about the call centre there.. Have you ever tried to focus on programming whilst people at call centre talk loud about how often they walk their dog to poo? I've been used there and then kicked out in a very sneaky way. They didn't fire me because I've been awesome (as far as my colleagues said) at work, they just made me want to leave after increasing my salary. I left that job with disgust and indignation. My new job now is far better but still hear the voice of the head of tech sometime as a ghost in my head. If I was another kind of person I would have probably punched his mouth until it stopped offending and harassing me because of too much bleed in the teeth.5
-
Not specifically a Dev job, but I did do a bit of development at this wifi startup. It was a wifi shop where we set up wifi for hotel clients all over the US. Anyways, they said I would make great money doing "on call" support, and me being an intern and naive I said absolutely I'd do it. Well 3 months later I was put on call essentially every day and one weekend I was with my mother and it was her birthday. At her party at this nice restaurant, with all of our close friends/family, I got a call. It took me 45 minutes to solve because of how idiotic the clients were, and after that I got 4 more calls equally as frustrating and long throughout that night. I asked for help from employees, the owner, ANYONE. Nobody helped. Needless to say I emailed the owner and said farewell that following Monday.
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Today I solved the problem assigned to me by changing one character. Simplest fix ever. Except that this problem is not on my project, and I don't have control over this project, so I can't merge my pull request or deploy the code, and the dev that does hasn't answered email today, and he's not scheduled out, and he's not in his office. Whatever, I'm just gonna say it's fuck it Friday and call it a week.1
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So according to my manager its not really acceptable for me to sit at my desk and vent about what a colossal idiot my Tech Lead is. Fair enough i suppose. even though he feels the need to chime in on every technical decision when he himself doesnt understand how async code works. he thinks you can set a variable inside a promise and then return that variable outside the promise, because its after the call. This guy is a senior software engineer on an iOS team and I, a trainee, have more iOS experience than him.2
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TLDR: There's some days where the Gods of IT are not with you. Just lost a whole day of work.
So this morning, we (me and my team) big performance issues with our web app. Lot's of requests time out, big latency, etc
Try to ssh to VPS, latency of 10 seconds between user input and output.
Usual checks: RAM ok, Proc ok, hard drive ok, reboot server (20 minutes), update/upgrade
We decide to call OVH. After 15 minutes call, we try to reboot in rescue mode. Reboot fails at 60% + everything freezes.
After an hour, OVH opens an incident ticket on +200 vps instances (including mine) everything is down during +1h
Finally everything is okay ! Even had time to migrate my new database schema.
Still, quick heavy on the mind but feels good to go home with everything working out correctly -
Just got off a call doing some classic "I know you are not tech support but please help me connect my iPhone to my computer", and I heard the following words:
"What's the Windows start button?"
This was not a boomer. This was not a Gen Y, Gen X, or even Millenial!
I shit you not, a zoomer did not know what or where the windows start button was.8 -
This week, they tested my backend and all hell broke lose ON THEIR SIDE. We had an emergency phone call and I proofed that it was not my fault which they even acknowledged.
Today, was a good day.1 -
when you have to use one language inside of another, and you basically have to call functions allowing you to call the other's language function within it, and you get the hell confused, since it gets harder and harder to see what is what and who can call who and how, and the compiler ofc. won't say anything about it since it only cares about the main language you are in and not the nesting of the other...
I just have no idea what I'm doing right now, or if my thought process and understanding of this is even close to where it is supposed to be.
D: I'm just confused and insecure about this right now....
time for experiments to figure this out, and get the hang of it13 -
Business Continuity / DR 101...
How could GitLab go down? A deleted directory? What!
A tired sysadmin should not be able to cause this much damage.
Did they have a TESTED dr plan? An untested plan is no plan. An untested plan does not count. An untested plan is an invitation to what occurred.
That the backups did not work does not cut it - sorry GitLab. Thorough testing is required before a disruptive event.
Did they do a thorough risk assessment?
We call this a 'lesson learned' in my BC/DR profession. Everyone please learn by it.
I hope GitLab is ok.2 -
// Stupid JSON
// Tale of back-end ember api from hell
// Background: I'm an android dev attempting to integrate // with an emberjs / rails back-end
slack conversation:
me 3:51pm: @backend-dev: Is there something of in the documentation for the update call on model x? I formed the payload per the docs like so
{
"valueA": true,
"valueB": false
}
and the call returns success 200 but the data isn't being updated when fetching again.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
backend-dev 4:00pm: the model doesn't look updated for the user are you sure you made the call?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
me 4:01pm: Pretty sure here's my payload and a screen grab of the successful request in postman <screenshot attached>
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
backend-dev 4:05pm: well i just created a new user on the website and it worked perfectly your code must be wrong
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
me 4:07pm: i can test some more to see if i get any different responses
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
backend-dev 4:15pm: ahhhhhh... I think it's expecting the string "true", not true
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
me 4:16: but the fetch call returns the json value as a boolean true/false
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
backend-dev 4:18pm: thats a feature, the flexible type system allows us to handle all sorts of data transformations. android must be limited and wonky.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
me 4:19pm: java is a statically typed language....
// crickets for ten minutes
me 4:30pm: i'll just write a transform on the model when i send an update call to perform toString() on the boolean values
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
backend-dev 4:35: great! told you it wasn't my documentation!
// face palm forever4 -
Today I created my first shell script for automation.
I have a git repository I use for backing up documents at the training centre I'm at for work. Not a specific project, just all of the documents and miscellaneous stuff. The need for this came about because they re-image the computers every month with a new version of windows (Because they're too cheap to register windows). And I can't risk forgetting to copy all the files onto my USB drive the day before they re-image.
So at the end of each day I open a git bash and type:
git add .
git commit -m "Backup - dd/mm/yy"
git push
Not a particularly laborious task but repetitive and time consuming.
So I decided to create a .sh script to automate the process
(The idea originally occurred because of this post: https://devrant.com/rants/329221/...)
So after about half an hour fiddling about with dates and $ signs, I came up with GitBackup.sh:
git add .
today=$(date '+%d-%m-%y')
commitMsg="Backup - "$today
git commit -m "$commitMsg"
git push origin master
Not much but proud to call it my first automation script.2 -
I hate it that some people at work call directly to my phone when they need help. They think that this way they will get service faster.
Now I understand if it’s an emergency but 95% of the cases it’s not. I most likely am stuck in a meeting or got my hands full with other work, so I am unable to answer my phone.
For gods sake, send a ticket, email or an instant message so my coworkers will be able to see your issue or I can forward it to availabe person. Stop spamming me with phone calls when I can’t answer!3 -
I label all packages I know are coming as being for a company: Derp Industries. This is from an old in-joke between my friends and I. This tells me whether a package was something I ordered or not from the label (as I often forget I have a package coming.) However, I just got a call from a DHL driver asking me how long we'll be open. I, uh... I told him we close at 8. He said that's perfect, as he has to pick up from the local holding station at 5 and i'm his first stop.
I'm tempted to call back and tell him I'm just a dude living in a trailer...2 -
ChaseBank is getting up my nose. Twice in four business days my account was flagged and I had to change my password for 'security' purposes. I spent the better part of 90 minutes in a futile attempt to find out why, when there's been no suspicious activity on my account, I'm being flagged. My father contacted a branch manager near him who told him to dial the priolrity customer service number and key in the letters (I shit you not) HO HO. I called the number. It's the same damn number I'd been calling. I called the branch. They told me I'd definitely receive a call back last Friday by 1800. No call. So, yesterday I called the manager of that branch, verified its location, told the manager he was supposed to call me by 1800 last Friday, and Chase Corporate would be in touch with him soon to explain that when you tell a customer you'll call them, you'll fucking call them.2
-
You shitty brat, if my HR staff didn't call you, they didn't call you. Still don't understand? Ok, simpler explanation. Because THEY DO NOT WANT YOU.
Just because we know each other doesn't mean you will get hired at my work. And you are not even a developer, you are a freaking sales man. Why the heck do you keep asking me about it?1 -
I'm feeling empty. All my friends and roomates went home. But I stayed in hostel. I haven't touched my laptop from last 3 days. I'm just lying on bed staring at ceiling. I'm not even in a relationship, so I call my mother everyday to get the feeling of being loved.
This quarantine is strange. First few days I spent my time playing video games, watching Netflix, laughing at memes. But Now I'm feeling empty. Very strange thoughts are now occupying my mind. I'm sleeping 10+ hrs, and staring at ceiling or outside window most of the time. My room is a mess. Forget washing hands, I don't even feel like standing up to switch on lights.
I'm not saying I feel sad or depressed, I just feel very strange.16 -
Be me
Newb Ui dev
New job , learn c#
Become xaml pro first
Newb ui dev
Today building menu
It's breaking ree.
Ok I go through an fix
Part fixed
No reee
Commit build for other my senior dev
We have online compiler
Receive build fail
Reeee
My code is good
I'm sweating bullets
I call other dev
Yo I f***** up
Help me
Go figure it out ... reeee
I go spend 40 mins
Don't know what is killing build
Reeee intensifies.
Going to shit diamonds
Reeeeeee
Other dev, lol my bad I turned on somethin that break ur build. Your not fired congrats.
Reeeeeeeeeeeeee3 -
*background: client has told account manager he's not paying any more money till his site is done, not only is it the most in-depth WordPress site we've made, but we'll beyond the scope of the signed contract. He sent a few more edits over the weekend which I ignored because we have a team meeting later to discuss he client and where to go from here.
account manager comes in and says he has a call from client looking for me. I tell him that he should probably take a message as I'm not in the mood to be belittled by the client and we have a meeting later to discuss him anyways, we'll call him back.
AM: Come on, he says it'll only take a second and I'll be here so we can do it on speaker.
he transfers the call and we start talking in my office, before the client has even finished his first remark, the AM has left the room. Now we have the least social person in the office talking to the client when both parties are less than happy.
I managed to keep my cool and not tell the client to fuck off, and made sure I was clear about not promising any of his new edits.
Phrases like "that will take time and money" were used a lot.
There may be shots fired at the meeting later.4 -
They call it security questions.
I call it social engineering backdoor.
I'm supposed to enter those questions after logging into my account and I'm not able to skip it nor to set a proper two factor method.
Well, fuck you. Did you ever thought about dying by a two factor method? Ever watched a Saw movie? You got the idea. -
Oh my god, GDScript is the single biggest piece of shit scripting language I have ever witnessed. It somehow manages to combine the very worst things of dynamic typing with the downsides of static typing, all in one bundle of utter shit
Imagine you have two game object scripts that want to reference each other, e.g. by calling each others methods.
Well you're outta fucking luck because scripts CANNOT have cyclic references. Not even fucking *type hints* can be cyclic between scripts. Okay no problem, since GDScript is loosely based of Python I can surely just call my method out of the blue without type hints and have it look it up by name. Nope! Not even with the inefficient as fuck `call` method that does a completely dynamic-at-runtime fuck-compile-time-we-script-in-this-bitch function call can find the function. Why? Because the variable that holds a reference to my other script is assumed to be of type Node. The very base class of everything
So not only is the optional typing colossal garbage. You cant even do a fucking dynamic function call because this piece of shit is just C++ in Pyhtons clothing. And nothing against C++ (first time I said that). At least c++ lets me call a fucking function8 -
Gah! (Totally guilty of it too but...)
That feeling when you ask a question like "how do I make SQL less intolerable for my team?" And you get answer like "just don't use SQL lol. Use this other thing!"
I appreciate suggestions, but why would I possibly use SQL if I had the choice to use literally anything else. I play by other people's rules and on their deadlines.10 -
As a developer, I WAS love with the concept of WFH. Thankfully, my office has no fixed hours (except for meetings!) and I can work at my pace peacefully. But lately, with WFH becoming mandatory, I can't seem to find time for myself!
Here's what my schedule looks like:
a. Start working at 10am
b. Standup at 11:30am
c. Lunch break at 2am
d. End work at 7pm.
A fairly simple routine but not sure why my team finds it completely normal to call me in off hours and moreover expect me to jump in a call too! I wish it was a 1-day affair. But no. It's a 24x7 day affair. Yes, let that sink in. 24x7.
How I wish there was no COVID and thus no lockdown. At least, people respected the work timings then !5 -
Was on call last night. I get a phone call at 3 am that all of our clients projects (including one that was launching at 5 am) was missing libraries (thus causing the sites to not work). I was able to fix all of the errors but one (missing jQuery). Couldn’t figure out how to fix for the life of me. Had to call my boss and wake her up because I forgot I could just download it from the site. Feeling like a failure for something so small.2
-
I am on my way home from an 8.5 hour non-stop call with one of our software suppliers...
How to you guys handle situations like that?
Consentrating became very difficult at the end to be honest.
And if it my teammates would not have been there (they gave me food, sth to drink and filled my coffee cup) I would have snapt after 4 hours...
The only thing I feel capable of doing for now is to listen to extremly loud music9 -
I don't know if I should call this a rant or not. I spent most of X-mas hacking away my code I haven't touched over a year and released the library to NuGet. Woot!
This has to be the way devs should spent holidays -
Ok.. So I applied for a web dev position at a small-to-medium sized company. They had a telephonic round which they were happy with. They then sent out an assignment for me (A simple webapp to complete in 1hr). I did it and sent them the code. Finally, the face to face interview also went well.
At the end of it all, the HR comes back and tells me - "You did not use a MVC framework for the assignment and your code was not optimized for unit testing."
Me - "Ugh. (1) You did not have to call me for the face to face interview if you did not like my code. (2) You specified NOT to use any 3rd party libraries when doing the assignment. (3) You can tell people directly that you cannot afford them."4 -
When an enterprise software vendor stops giving deliverable dates to fix their product because they admittedly have not met any deliverable dates In the past. Huh wtf. I would say bye-bye now if it were my call.2
-
I have not worked all day today and have only attended meetings. Going to call in a half day since I am in a total unhealthy (cheese puffs and fried food) kind of day today and have just been in my bed binge watching.8
-
Customer service my ass. I wouldn't even call it service. All you could do is check if it's working now. Of course it's working... I've just told you it's fucking working 2 minutes then inaccessible for fucking 10.
And when I tell you that your service had began to loose quality in the past few months you just sit there in FUCKING SILENCE. MOTHERFUCKER JUST TELL ME THAT YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT... OR SORRY... OR GO FUCK YOURSELF, NOT MY JOB... I DON'T FUCKING CARE JUST DON'T SIT THERE IN SILENCE UNTIL I HAVE ENOUGH AND HANG UP... I WASN'T EVEN SHOUTED TO HIM. I was disappointed but not angry... Not until you decided to just ignore me, fucktard...
Needless to say just when I hung up it stopped working again. -.-4 -
My brain overheated again. with my autistic empathy cranked to 11, I’m now feeling sorry for a js service worker because browser puts it to sleep when it wants to, and it has to call waitUntil to ask the browser not to
I’m about to cry -
I love how the people that stay here at this student accommodation uses the WiFi without consideration. There is about 14 people in the house with maybe 2 devices that connects to the WiFi, which connects to an ADSL line that has a speed of 10mbps. One of my roommates, video calls on Skype with his gf or whoever DAILY. You probably expect them to be talking and stuff right? No, they just have video call on but not talking just doing their own thing on their phones and stuff... Wtf? Dont they realise they hogging up the bandwidth?
Every time I restart the WiFi he waits for the connection to be up and goes back to having the video call up but not chatting... Ffs...18 -
The sentence we all dread:
"My stereo (insert any other piece of home tech...) is acting up, call ______ he works with computer's he'll know what to do"
ME: "Take it to the service shop, I'm a programmer not an electrical engineer"
After that you can't help but think they're thinking you just suck at your job... "pff he know's nothing" -
my humblest experience until now so far:
I am not even able to solve the rubiks cube, and I can call me software engineer2 -
Why can't my team including my boss learn to stop making assumptions... And mixing seperate issues into one...
If there's a fucking production issue, first step is to reproduce it... AKA ask what the user did and what he expects....
Not...
User: hey we call this url and get an error
Dev: ok rollback -
I am embrassed.. :(
Situation was..
It was 3-4 months ago I written the process but now client was saying it is not working so I just need to update value in array..
I spent 2-3 hours everything was good..
only in the statement where I am assigning the value is not working.
I was like dude wtf call your senior why its not working .. everything is correct.. then suddenly my eyes catch the rubbish thing I did..
this is what I used mistakenly for assignment "=="
:( and I was looking at statement from 1-2 hour.. it just wasted my time3 -
I had to sign a GDPR form when renewing my car's insurance. Also I forgot to renew it on time because of GDPR. They used to call me a week before it expired, but since the new regulation they could not. I like and hate GDPR at the same time.1
-
I'm an android developer. It's Friday evening. Just received a call from my honcho. He asked me to "hack" one website and get all the data from it.
Now I'm downloading PyCharm...
It's not a regular "fucking hell". It's a shit. Period.2 -
!dev
Fucking hell, my phone (Nexus 5X) just died: I was browsing the web in Chrome, it suddenly hung, after a few seconds it turned off, and will not turn on at all now, it's just completely dead. FUCK!
I was going to pick up a used printer this afternoon, now I may not be able to because I can't contact the person to get their address. And if I could, I don't have Maps to find the way. FUCK!
On top of that, yesterday I got a call from the bank that my credit card was used in a fraudulent transaction so they had to cancel it, and send out a new one, which I will not have until Friday or Monday next. FUCK!6 -
What's the actual requirements to be called full stack developer? I do front-end, back-end, database, server, my own api's etc. I even have a t-shirt with "Keep calm and hug a printer". I've been doing this for 15 years and would not call me an expert in any part and certainly not privilegied for the full stack title. So what is?
If this was a humblebrag then please shoot me..7 -
Hey, a bit of a dumb question.
When can someone call themselves a "real" programmer? I'm not one to gatekeep and say dumb shit like "iF yOu OnLy KnOw PyThOn Ur NoT a PrOgRaMmEr!", but I guess I want to know when I can call myself one. All I've done so far is make unpolished games in Unity for school that are created only to meet some requirements. I've also worked in my class' team for collaborative Unreal games, which has been painful to say the least. So, when I can stop gatekeeping myself over it? What sorts of experiences should I have? I understand that it's not a list of requirements like my projects are, but I'd like a general idea of when I can call myself a real developer.7 -
Not just a rant, also a call for help.
After 10 years using Git, I'm constrained to use Mercurial (company policy). It effing feels like playing tennis with one arm tied to my back.
Please, who knows a good GUI for Linux, or at least a command line tool to show a decent log?
Kill Mercurial!3 -
*Friday morning*
Me: "Ok the client wants to talk with you on Wednesday at 10 am. It's a conference call on Hangouts, here's the link: [ link ]. Be on time, I have already sent you all the details about the topics you'll have to cover. I will be available during the weekend if you need help, we cannot afford to make mistakes"
Smartass Dev: "Don't worry, I am on it"
*Tuesday, after lunch break*
Me: "Just a final check: is everything clear with my email? I'm working late tonight, call me if you need something else. They'll probably share some slides, be sure to join from your laptop: [ link ]"
Smartass Dev: "No problem, I am fine"
*Wednesday, 11.15 am*
Smartass Dev: "Hey, what a shitty client! I waited more than an hour and they did not even tell me that the call was canceled. This is so unprofessional."
Me: "The call was not canceled"
Smartass Dev: "Dude, I had my phone here on the desk. I was ready to answer but they never called"
Me: "Did you open the link?"
Smartass Dev: "What link?????"
Me: "It was on Hangouts, I sent you the link twice"
Smartass Dev: "Really...? I'm so unlucky these days. Next time will be better 🙂" -
21:37
Manager: Hi
Manager: Do you know anything about this? <screenshot.jpg>
Me: Hi
Manager: Oh, I didn't mean to disturb you this late
Me: *what....? Then what DID you mean by writing to me at my bedtime....?*
(Though it's good he pinged me - it was a valid and time-sensitive concern. But saying "I didn't mean to" - that's just not true. Call a spade a spade and spit out what you need)10 -
Nothing like having your hands full with work projects, then getting a message from your, not so technically knowledgeable, dad, which says that he's going to remove linux from your old laptop and replace it woth windows.
By himself.....
Tried talking him out of it, but je's adamant about it.
Should I call an ambulance?
I also feel really bad for my old laptop now -
My last week of vacations. A brake on bussiness programing... lol
Monday:
Receive a phone call from a colegue:
Hi the equipment it not working.
Me: ( upset with the acuracy) reboot that shit!
Colegue: Its working. Thank you.
Me: 😲😨😵😱
Today (Thursday):
Collegue: The printer is not working!
Me: 😡 Im on vacation. Check the cable or try to reinstall the printer...
Colegue: Its working. Thank you.
Me: 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱
2 fucking hours later:
Collegue try to call
Me: Did not answer... 😡 Fuch this shit.
Colegue send text message saying that they had a problem on the video projector but its ok now..
Me: 😠😡😢😢😢
I'M ON V A C A T I O N3 -
#storytime
Soon I'll start moving to a new place on the 16th and I wanted to change my address at the Internet provider (T).
go to provider website (T) reading that I need to call them...
CALL (T): .... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 30 minutes later:
Operator: Hi moving, yes.. When? we send you an email with details to send Mechanic.
Next day: waking up. clicking mail on my phone in bed half sleepy. select 15th. next. next. next. accept. done.
Me happy :) .... One hour later realizing I said 15th.. and it should be 25... FUCK!!! Me Mad! Knowing what's going to happen...
Click link in mail to change date. You need to call (E).
CALL (E) : ... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 1 hour later.... Give up..
CALL (E)(2): ... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 1.2 hour later.... Give up..
Next day CALL (E)(3): ... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 45 minutes later....
Operator: Hi, yes we can move to date 21. you need to call (R) to change fiber mechanic I'll patch you trough
CALL (T) : ... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 30 minutes later....
Operator: You need to call (K) Here is the number 123456789..
CALL (K): ... Automatic answering machine.. ... longer than normal, covid19, 20 minutes later
Operator: This department (R) can not be reached by phone we will call you back.
Next day:
Incoming call from (K). Because you are moving to a new house you do not need (R). have a nice day.
Have a nice day to you too calm and friendly.
hopefully I won't be without internet for a couple of days...1 -
Our clients came from abroad to have 4 days of business meetings and planing about next stage of product development. Of course they wanted to go shopping and to restaurants etc. Obviously they can not call a cab because they cannot say the name even close to its correct pronunciation. Who do you think needed to babysit them? You guessed right - me. FUCK MY LIFE2
-
Where and How do you make developer friends.
My coworkers are smart and decent developers but they learned on the job for the job.
But they're not interested in discussing improvements to legacy projects that barely still work until they break and we need to rush to recreate them 'better'.
or sit on a call on the weekend working on spontaneous personal projects that usually die cause another idea came along.
Sometimes I really just want someone I can hop on a discord call with so they can criticize my projects and brainstorm ideas and improvements with me4 -
Man, got a call today from a company in Hawaii to do a job similar to what I'm doing now. The salary was 50k less than I'm making here in the states, not even joking. There goes my dream... 😞2
-
So I had this Google account for all of clients social, hosting, etc.
Out of the blue client wants access to these accounts.
Unfortunately I had not logged into these accounts in a long time.
Now when I try to login Google is not sending 2f texts to my registered number, even the give code over call option is not working, my number is recieving texts and calls, so it's not a network issue.
To top it all off due to numerous attempts it won't let me try other options and my recovery email recieved security alert of the said attempts with no option of actually specifying it was a legitimate attempt.
Fuck this overly protective attempt at security and fuck the guy who thought it was a good idea to send emails about attempts but not including any option to actually do something about it.6 -
Last week I asked my manager a piggy bank where other employees could put money every time they open a ticket or make a call for something that is unnecessary, not concerning us or poorly described.
I am still waiting…3 -
Possibly my favourite function is Clojure's "recur", which isn't really a function at all, but a special form that gives you a guaranteed tail-position call to the current function.
Basically what that means is you can write recursive functions (functions that call themselves) and know that you're not creating a potential stack overflow.
Um. Okay, I can feel people looking at me like 🤔 Basically what *that* means is: normally when a function calls another function, a "stack frame" is allocated, holding all the local variables for that call. If a function calls itself 1000 times, 1000 stack frames get allocated. "Tail call optimisation" is a process by which if you call yourself as the very last thing in a function, the language doesn't need to remember the current frame; it just has to pass the return value upwards. The trouble is, it's sometimes hard to notice that you've turned a tail-call optimisable function into a non-optimisable one. Clojure's recur keyword makes it explicit, and therefore safe: if you try to do anything with the return value of recur, it's an error.
PS I'm sure another language did explicit TCR first, but Clojure is where I first saw it.6 -
Family wasn't very supportive of my first choice (Film Directing) and since I live in Latin America and both of my parents come from very poor families, they pushed me to engineering in order to make money and live a better life than they did.
Even though it was not my initial call and they were not very supportive of my first choice, once I started CS they gave me everything I needed to keep on studying.
Overall, I think that for a lot of coders out here from third world countries, we can agree that engineering was not our first call, but it's mostly a way to get out of poverty and into a field that gives you advantages over others.
Shout out third world country ranters!3 -
to add a bit of fancyness i print the scripts name and 'by' my 'artists name' whenever scripts are executed. today i got a call 'it says error on line 1, what did i do wrong?' i am still laughing tears. did not consider this programmers joke to have an impact irl.1
-
I was told by my aunt that my niece (who also lives in Colombia) would call me (I live in the Netherlands). When I asked why she would call my aunt responded saying that she did not know. I was happy, it is not very often that my Colombian family calls me.
So I waited.... and waited... and waited... finally she called very late. Turns out she wanted to ask me which Smartphone was better.... :-(.
That was a disappointment... Normally if I go visit my familly there in Colombia they bring all there devices and ask me if I can fix them or install a certain program on it. I dont mind doing that. It can be very interesting. For example: a few months ago another aunt asked me to look at her computer to find out why it was so slow... turned out she had a very old PC with Windows XP installed on it. I fixed the problem by installing light linux distro on the computer. (she only used the browser so that was not a big problem). But yeah... I played for a while with good old Windows XP.
Okay back to the beginning. It is awful if family just calls you to ask witch phone is better.
Thats all... :-)3 -
That's a good one!
Sadly, in real life, I'm overly polite (working on fixing that dammit!!) and always trying to stay professional. I have a couple of coworkers who not only need a scolding, they need someone to beat their idiocy out of their little brains.
I have on occasions told some coworkers off when they were way out of place. A recent one: idiot PO trying to micromanage the dev team and thinking he's manager of the devs, came to me personally (sudden Slack call, no calendar invite) with some bullshit feedback about ̶c̶o̶m̶m̶u̶n̶i̶c̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ CUMmNnicaTioN (I had to). Told him it's not his place to give me feedback and it's not his place to manage my time for me and ended the call aggressively which I don't prefer (it's always better to keep your cool and control your thoughts and words). My cholesterol level went up writing this.
Thank you and have a nice Monday!4 -
Stack overflow is full of useless assholes, like I asked a specific question about a problem I am having that is similar to another problem that exists but it is not the same at all in terms of how to fix and instead of helping I’ve got 2 downvotes on it and a comment linking me to a completely unrelated stylistic based question based on something I SAID I HAD ALREADY TRIED CHANGING IN MY QUESTION!!! Here’s my question btw in case anyone can help here before I smash up my laptop 😑:
I have a piece of code in which I am trying to read in words which have been categorised using a number and then placed in a text file in the following format "word-number-" with a new line for each word. However, despite not mixing cin>> and getline and having tried a number of methods I still cannot get it working.
So far I have attempted using a cin.ignore() call to clear any '\n' char's from the buffer, as well as checking if the file is opening in the first place (it is), and using the >> operator instead throughout my code however I could not get that working either. When I place the get line call inside the condition of the while loop, the while loop doesn't run, however when I make the while loop condition a .eof() call it will run once however when I try to print the text that has been read from the getline call it just prints a blank line.
if(file.is_open()){
while(!file.eof()){
getline(file, text, '-');
count++;
cout<<count<<endl;
cout<<text<<endl;
if(count%2 == 1){
wordBuff = text;
}else if(count%2 == 0){
if(stoi(text) == wordClass){
wordList.push_back(wordBuff);
}
}
}
file.close();
}
While I recognise there are a lot of other questions on this out there I cannot seem to get any of their solutions to work and the vast number being related to people mixing the >> operator and getline doesn't help, so any tips or solutions will be of great help -
Follow up on yesterday's rant: by the end of today I had version "stupid" running. Now off to making it smart.
... and I'm really feeling burnt out. Smoked a crapton to get my brain working. Now wishing there was someone I could call or talk to, just so I could feel normalcy. Just so I could feel like I'm not spending my days fighting a battle. Cuddles would be nice too. (it's not that there's no one, there's just no one without a baggage or string or expectations or limits or idk)
Also, part of the robot arm is breaking apart and I have to make sure shit doesn't go haywire when we repair it tomorrow. 😑
I love what I do but damn it burns my brain to crisps.4 -
!rant but wondering,
this time I did not get my self blocked out of my server lol
But I have set up nginx to receive url then redirect to another server, my question is:
I ran tracert on the url but it ended on the nginx server, is there a way I can find out if my nginx IP is forwarding?
I have a webservice on server z, and nginx on server x, tracert end at server x, so does dev tools in chrome/firefox they show host ip header as server x. Is there a way where I can trace my call to server x if it is forwarded to another server?
I know I'm forwarding it, but if someone wants to know, can they? -
My manager just told me this at the end of the work day.
Today, my manager got a call from client "X".
They wanted to know why issue "Y" happened at event "Z" that was being put on for their client.
My manager basically told them we had nothing to do with that part of the event, so we wouldn't have had anything to do with solving problem "Y" either, but that what ended up causing problem "Y" had been passively mentioned to us months ago, and that he's not sure why their client didn't communicate it.
Client "X" told my manager that they would call back after talking to their person that helped organize event "Z".
No call back.
Definitely rant-ish, but also kind of a funny/ridiculous story to end the work day with.4 -
Hello guys..i dont know why i am posting it here...but i am really depressed..i am a fresher mern stack developer...i am applying everywhere but i am not getting any callback from any HRs..i am thinking of either running away or killing myself....i dont know what to do...my wife earns just 9500 rupees from her call center job and we both have to give 5000 every month to my mom for household expenses....it has become vert difficult for me and my wife to save money...i dont know what to do....28
-
#DailyRant
I don't like Laravel Livewire and the architectural aspect of it. Every key stroke is a call to the server. The freedom of designing the minute behaviours are taken away. (e.g. border-bottom on a certain div). The maintain ability is not good either. Change one variable name and the whole thing breaks and it's difficult to pinpoint where it broke exactly. And the most of all, it's not beginner friendly.
My chest feels lighter now. Thanks. -
I'm such a big dumbass causing a bad second-impression in my new job: missed the standup because I'm a retard at reading how Outlook shows you the time of a meeting when you accept it, the time shown is the time of the inviter not your local time! And that day-1 training? Had to be completed by yesterday. Had to message the higher up I knew and was available, own my shit and apologize. Received a call from the outsourcing company's boss as he got notify from HR of my faux pas with the training.
I need to do better...6 -
Make the development environment, the code base and the documentation cleaner for the new hires.
My predecessors copied whole repos without clean-up and doc and let me figure out what was working or not. They just 'made' it work. The CI process, if you can call it that, is unstable and overengineered as hell.
I don't want new hires to feel the same dread I did trying to repair other people's stack of mistakes.2 -
I built an api to sync data between two systems. It is simple, if I have new data to send, I call their api with data. If success, get Json response back or error if not.
Today the guy from other side asked me for "acknowledgement" endpoint. I was literally WTF?
He explained me very clear, when I call their api, it can be either success or fail, so for those success or fail, he will send the response to my "ACKNOWLEDGEMENT ENDPOINT" to tell me if success or not.
*facepalm*8 -
Thank You StackOverflow.
After looking for 4 hours on internet and stackoverflow, searching whole documentation and blog pages, i didn't find a solution to an error I was getting in my Android app.
So I began and started writing the question on StackOverflow, phrasing it properly, to the point (so as to not get downvoted), providing all my files and code (so not to get closed or duplicate), formatting them properly, and explaining why my error was unique. On the last XML file I see something trying to call a function which wasn't declared.
So yeah, there you go.
But it's not over yet.
I saw it and got excited, corrected it and ran the code again. But accidentally ran it on the emulator and forgot my device wasn't connected anymore, and the emulator wasn't already loaded either. And my machine is old.
I don't know what to say anymore.1 -
I was under fire right now.
One cellular company, Idea, whose Internet service works really good, was blocking port 22.
And other, BSNL, which works terrible at my home, and is not working recently, since last few days( Maybe be data pack was over ), atleast support port 22.
Just got the call from client who has to send sms to all its clients, immediately. So BSNL was not working. And Idea was not supporting port 22.
Still, I gave IDEA Cellular, a try, and luckily it worked today. They started supporting port 22, at the right time.
My ASS is Saved -
!rant
Hello all, I'm not too experienced with open sourcing code, so here is my first attempt with a small script that initiates a phone call using php.
If someone has the time, please let me know what you think, any important things I'm missing or any advice you might have.
Thank you devRanters!
https://gist.github.com/anpel/...4 -
I have a client who I do web design and hosting for. He texted me at 5am to tell me that his website "was no longer working" and he wanted me to fix it. He got mad and threatened to cancel his services because we couldn't "keep his site up". It turned out that he let his domain name expire. I am not a morning person and that was my only day off. I guess that's what you call self employment.1
-
To my boss who thinks is ok to message somebody:
- On his/her day off
- On Saturday
- On a Sunday morning
Of course all was related to business as usual stuff no real emergency stuff nor that would have impacted anyone waiting till Monday morning.
Of course no overtime nor on call here and been blamed due my ‘flexible’ schedule (read arriving at 09:15 rather say 09:00) but of course out of office hours work or having to deal with hot projects no one was able to deliver does not count...
Talking of true leadership10 -
We noticed that in our landing directory we were receiving duplicate files.
I asked the source to investigate.
He told me that the issue was not at his end. He asked me to mark the issue has been resolved from his end. I refused.
We get on a call to debug the issue. After 30mins he is extremely frustrated. As he was sharing his screen, he runs the command `ls -ltr | uniq -cd` on his server which sends the files and then screams at me "Where are the duplicates? Show me. Check the output. There are no duplicates.".
I first muted the call. Had a good laugh. Made him repeat it to show my team mates. They had a good laugh too.
I then asked him to call it a day. And once you cool down, think about what you just showed me. -
I've had enough of recruitment phone calls, from now on if they don't follow:
1) Look at the FAQ made solely for them.
2) Contact me exclusively through email or chat(Skype) indicated by me.
I'll not f*ucking care about them.
My memory is not made to record perfectly every single call from any job offering, I'm sick of getting lost in memories of calls that, in the end, sound really similar between each other. F*ck this system of "I need your number to keep in touch with you(or update you) about this offer".1 -
So a while back I was contacted by a recruiter, I wasn't interested at first but ended up interviewing and eventually took the role. Fast forward 2 months into the role I get a courtesy email asking how things are going and if I would like a call to chat.
I responded saying I didn't like the role and provided a suitable time to call. I never heard anything back until fast forward another 4 months.
Today I got a REPLY to my email where I said was not happy in the role, and what was the email about?
This guy wanted a favour as they had another candidate and wanted me to provide contact details of a manager to skip the usual HR process. -
Opinions please.
I want to share a small model in my iOS app. Now on android I'd do with with ViewModelProviders, but on iOS I'm going with SharedDataContainer which is basically a singleton class that store key value data.
Is there any better approach? Data will not be bigger than 10 list items with guid (key) and int (value)
However; when I have big data I do cache on disk or hello OOM exceptions (or whatever they call that bitch on iOS) -
Most satisfying bug, it was something with good old $.ajax, way back when Axios wasn't a thing and SPAs weren't so widely used.
I was somehow able to fix the call params for a file that would not load with any other setup. Maybe it was just setting async to sync or something like that, however the thing is I was not familiar with AJAX at all, but I managed to get it run.
Then I googled, why its working and figured out all the answers on SO and other pages were the exact thing i set up for my call. I was so proud
some context: I was struggling with this bug for days and asked more experienced web devs, everybody answered, your code should just work fine.
Maybe thats why I have a positive relation with SO, because the first thing i searched there was something that I figured out myself, haha -
So in the past 3 days I've almost had 6 heart attacks, I've been giving public speeches for random classes at my school as a practise.
Today I'm going to some capital city finals shit whatever you call it and I have to give a public speech to fuc knows how many people.
I wrote a speech about lies in 700 words, speech has to be 5 minutes, oh yeah, in English. It's not my native...
Man, I am not ok at all Xd, they had to choose the one who has anxiety dosorders.2 -
on a video call with my whore blonde ex. shes having a mental breakdown sobbing and crying down on the floor for hours due to excessive stress with studying for exams. she is being psychologically torn apart.
her cries in agony is music to my ears.
her depression is my happiness.
her psychological destruction, is my satisfaction.
because she put me through 100x as worse, cold blooded not having feelings or giving a fuck how i felt, when i found out she was whoring around for the past 2 years, stabbing a sword in my back.
i was the only person who viewed her as serious. everyone else used her as a whore.
one man's wife, is another man's whore.
all women are whores.40 -
At a FIFTH interview call and waiting.
Scheduled at 4pm, just got to know the HR himself is in a fucking meeting. So procedure would resume at 5pm. Like seriously?
Why do these big corps not give a fuck about applicants' time. Why schedule at 4pm in the first place.
Also scheduling at 4pm so I miss another work day at my current company...
No value for our time :(1 -
I'm developing Android apps for my pastime (student on summer break) and will use my phone for running/debugging apps because my shitty laptop can't run the emulator.
If receive a call when I'm using the phone for debugging, I'm not picking it up. Even if it's a friend with whom I've not spoken in weeks. That call has to wait for my gradle to finish building.
Of course, I try to call back as soon as possible but that sometimes means an hour or two when I decide to get up from my laptop.
I'm not sorry8 -
I was just thinking that if i need to setup a log server i'd need to name it properly so this was my conversation with myself:
me: i should name the log server something relevant
inner me: call it log_cabin
me: that's not relevat
inner me: CALL IT LOG_CABIN -
I fucking hate sleep destroying on-call. I'd rather you just euthanize me and put me out of my fucking misery.
This idiocy of comparing most dev. on calls it to doctors to on call is fucking stupid unless maybe you're in health care and lives actually might be on the line. Pretty sure a fair number of doctors wouldn't wanna be on call and would rather sleep.
It also doesn't helps that it's not in my contract, I'm not getting paid for it, and I stupidly believed HR when they said I wouldn't need to. Should've trusted the dev.s when interviewing said there is. No way I'm getting out of on call without being fired when we're all on rotation.2 -
Why does on-call schedule always ramp up shortly before the final hour?
Due to christmas and vacations I had on-call schedule, five days off, on-call schedule and both times, riiiight before my schedule ended, the monitoring/alerting system EXPLODED!!11!1
Seriously, I get the need for on-call schedule, but how are you supposed to get regular day-to-day work done when you're always on the edge because you're just waiting for the next alert to pop-up.
I'm so glad when I finally move from this company, no on-call schedule and other stuffs (which are unrelated for now, maybe in another rant) anymore.
I really respect people who are doing on-call schedule and such but I am definitely not meant for it. -
It really annoys me that many tech recruiters do not have a basic knowledge of the roles they are trying to recruit for and what skill set to look for when they cold message/call potential candidates on LinkedIn.
I make it very clear on my profile that I am a Full Stack Engineer. Still, every other day I get messages about Data Engineering, Frontend Dev or SRE roles. Sometimes a recruiter would insist that I schedule a call with them before they tell me the details, and then I would realize after the call what an absolute waste of time it was.
I have a lot of respect for recruiters. It's not an easy job. But I'm starting to strongly believe that tech recruiters should be made to go through a specialized training to make life easy for themselves and to stop wasting time of people who are not even remotely suitable for their requirements. -
!rant
I hate when my coworkers that work at call centre think programmers can be summoned to fix printer or PC in company. We have tech support for that.
I can fix the damn printer if I need to but dude dont go in like a stampedo of angry bulls.
My boss saw this and placed the do not disturb sticker on door of our section. -
We had a dispute @ work yesterday on this topic :
aproach 1 :
$res = getSomeData( [ 'filter_1' => 'str_1', 'filter_2' => 'str_2', ... 'limit' => 10 );
with
function getSomeData( $data )
{
...
}
VS
aproach 2 :
$res = getSomeData( 'str_1', 'str_2', ... 10 );
with
function getSomeData( $filter_1 = '', $filter_2 = 'default_str', ... $limit = 20 )
{
...
}
I had used 1-st b/c IMHO it's more dynamic and easy to maintain and call ( especially when there are many params, most of which not used on each call )
and my colleague didn't liked it w/h his main arguments that one can not easily see the needed params and no default vals for them ( the latest could be easily corrected in the function body ). I'm curious to read your opinions, arguments & contra arguments for each aproach12 -
TLDR: I wanted to change email to new one, but I could not remember which one I have
currently. I found out an API in DevRant JS files for email verification and used
it to find it out.
So, I am moving from Gmail to Protonmail Pro, absolutely love their service.
I wanted to do same on Devrant but I could not figure out my current mail for
"I lost my password" form. My Password Manager have only login saved, and profile does
not show email address.
I thought that this user information is stored on server so it have to be some way to retrieve it. I dug
in source code and I've found:
`<div class="signup-title">Verify Your Email</div>`
Which has event assigned to function which uses jQuery.ajax (love it btw :D) to call:
`url: "/api/users/me/resend-confirm",`
This seems like worth a shot. Few copy-pastes and one ajax call later:
*Ding*
From: support@devrant.io
To: dawid@dawidgoslawski.pl
"Welcome to Devrant"
Got it :) So I have already changed in march when DevRant on previous layout.
This is what I love in this profession - problem solving. AI will not replace human
in any way, we will just stop coding array iterations and data manipulation - we will focus
on real problem solving and human touch (like design, convincing management for changes).1 -
!dev
If you driving a FUCKing Peugeot 107, don't FUCKing start to tailgate me, m'kay?!
Especially not on the highway imbecile fuckwit!
Because, I know for a fact that the rusty boneshaking rattletrap, that you call a car won't be able to overtake anyway!!
FUCKing dork, safety distance heard of it?
I bet my left nut, that you draw your drivers license in legoland.1 -
!rant !!Story
I installed Truecaller and it naturally scraped my contacts information. I realized that anyone now who had not saved my number can search who I am. I didn't want that to happen so I uninstalled Truecaller. But people still saw the name and profile I had created. So I reinstalled Truecaller changed my name and surname to 'Call me to know who I am' and uninstalled Truecaller again. Now it overrides the information so anyone searches for my number and hasn't saved it that's what he'll see.3 -
on a pleasant note,
Seriously, fuck myPhpAdmin. Fuck c9 and fuck MySql. My connection is solid i can do mini crap. my ajax call is good too. so idk why.
Ive spent over a week on a bug and now “occasionally working” is the best I can get and im not even sure why.
This assignment is due today.
I cant even try to do it locally cause for some reason myphpadmin and mysql dont wanna work on my laptop so yay fuck me.4 -
Here we go again:
--------
Hi xxxxx,
My sincere apologies for my professional persistence while I am having a very difficult time in getting hold of you.
My intention is to know your interest in scheduling a quick call with my Director at your free time. We are not looking for any business opportunities rather we would like to get introduced & make you aware on our full range of capabilities at a global stand point.
Let me know please.
Regards,
Sandeep
--------
In a single sentence he basically said, "We are not trying to sell you something, rather we are trying to sell you something."
Seriously?3 -
i'm not a dev but i do implementations of our software so i need to work with our devs fairly often. this is an actual transcript from a conversation with a dev today - is this a bad sign when the conversation goes like this?:
developer: any news from these guys?
me: yea he replied to the email thread
he's fine with giving us his password on the call
developer: ok, just checking, because i did not receive it
me: really thats weird you are cced
developer: ohhh…. sorry… my mailbox is to messy -
Yesterday was "but you are Russian" day. It was somehow decided by people in my office, that Russians are the fixers. Basically its the regular flow: Fix the wifi, install me a Windows, Fix VM image, fix my sd card coz its fucked up, I have issues with my hotspot, air conditioner is not cooling enough. But whats weird... Those people are fucking developers themselves!! Wtf?! I got a call from US team (I'm in Israel) and they wanted me to fix their laptop over the phone!!!!!! FUCK!!😕
-
Special work area meeting. Partners from around the globe came in. Call in or you flew in. Close enough, have to attend in person. Hundreds of people there. Starts at 9, broke at noon, picked back up at 1, ended at 6. Focus? Improving sales. About 98% of the people there did not make sales. About 70% did not work on bids and proposals. It was extremely painful and boring. And my project manager didn't know why we were so upset the next day. It had been extremely "informative" to her.1
-
What's up with recruiters calling the office? Today, a coworker got a call from a recruiter. 5 minutes later I got a call from a lady from an IT Management consulting company asking me if I'm the right person to talk to which I'm quite obviously not (she apparently sent me an email last week, which, if I got it, marked as spam).
In my last job several recruiters called; how could I even talk open on the phone -.- -
A friend of a coworker of a... let's just call it 3rd or 4th degree, says this place is hiring devs. Supposedly, # of headaches per week is less than average, they don't call people ninjas (deal-breaker, right?), Salespeople who know 2 cents about computers aren't called Sales "Engineers". (Woo!)
Not bad for a place in San Francisco. LMAO. My bad. Cynic in me can't promote for ssh-it
https://linkedin.com/jobs/search/...
I want mucho Kudos if you get selected. Actually, Snickers.1 -
Comcast has called me every day for the past week. Everytime I pick up there's a two second pause and then they hang up.
Now they left me a voice message saying they have an important notice about my account and they need to get ahold of me.
They call again- and immediately hang up.
Why. Fix your automated phone service ffs!
It's Comcast supports actual number, verified. Not even a scammer or such.3 -
Programmer at an interview:
interviewer: introduce yourself
programmer: Hi, my name is ______, and am a programmer,
you can actually call me a programmer because from the top I look good, but from the bottom I am naked.
comment below whether you will be hiring this programmer on not.7 -
Got a phone call from a scammer claiming to be my Cell Phone Provider saying “Congratulations! You just recieved unlimited calls and messages for a year, now to win this please give the 4 digit pins given to you” then I recieved a 4 digit pin and warning label not to give this message to anyone else. I then noticed that this was a scammer, i got his probably fake number and I tried to mess with him by giving random codes, he then noticed that the numbers were fake in the 5 try.
I truly feel bad for this idiot and just call him a scammer and end the call...1 -
I saw an interesting course event in my city, the post was on LinkedIn. I contacted the poster about tye price and more details.
And today it's the third day he messaging me and call me about enrolling and how can I attend the shit course. I already told him I'm not interested for now.
What can I do? I am mot in the mood to be harsh and tell him fuck off4 -
I'm still a student, I'm attending my second year of university. Today I got what I could call a job offer. But tbh I'm not sure about that. The company that should hire me doesn't exist yet and I will work as a part-time employee until I finish the university. Idk I feel like I'm not suited for the job (I will work as Web Dev), like I'm not good enough even for a job that still doesn't exist. Yeah I'm shit2
-
Why is "voice mail" not commonly used in India?
It is SO much more easier to just listen to the voice notes left by people rather than having to call you back and ask them their purpose of the call. And don't tell me "you got voice messages on various messaging apps" because that won't change my mind about it4 -
In my head: Look man, I'm not saying you're lying. I just need examples of these reported failures. Call times, caller IDs, etc. I am trying to track this issue for you, but we've had no failures, and the call samples you provided show that the calls went through. We've tested the calls and they went through. You tested the call with your cell and it went through. Can you please provide examples of failures? That's what I need to help you. I'm not calling you a liar. Oh, and by the way, GO FUCK YOURSELF!
-
i am on a phone call, and relying on the mute button for the life of me, that the other person does not hear my loud farting from massive shitting on the toilet4
-
So basically
-I have a project to finish due next week from an interview i had and i mentioned that i want a server side role, i am more of a PHP & MySQL (laravel).
-Also told them i am not very good at the front end
-So good so far
-They gave me the requirements
-BUILD A FU##ING website using
{
- BOOTSTRAP AND WORDPRESS
}
two let's call them tools i have NEVER used and also mentioned that
So here i am having my fking pulse over 100 trying to damn figure out how this bs works.
End my suffering
Have a nice day!!8 -
Calling something "idempotent" is fucking stupid. Why do you have to overcomplicate an already complicated shit such as terraform?
Why not call it unchangeable? Something that can be understood by a 2 year old. What even is the "immutable" word for if not even that is being used??? Why have 2+ words that define the same shit. Are u fking stupid who the fuck coined this phrase Idempotent and thought it was a good idea
When i read idempotent i have to remember and translate in my mind that it actually means "not changeable". On contrary theres "Non-Idempotent" so this fucks up the complexity even more cause Now i have to translate it as "non-not changeable -> which means it is everything But not changeable -> so if it is NOT not changeable -> it means it IS changeable" Fffuck offf13 -
Part of my remote work is to have a daily call reporting in on what I have done yesterday and what I am about to today. My colleague calls me for it. She's hired as a tech support and is suddenly assigned to take note and report on my work activities to our boss. Several times, I caught her pretending to know what I'm talking about like with Puppet configurations, Firewall diagnosis packets, ActiveMQ, Regex, etc. Most of the time, I just let it go as its not my job to validate her knowledge on these different but many services. Just do the call, get the report in, carry on. How difficult was that?
Yesterday, our call was left sour because I somehow blew up. I think I've reached my patience with this woman's assumptions to how these services work. Now I feel guilty for yelling at a lady but goddamn she stoopid for fibbing through my ear. Somebody help! What do I do?
If I report to our boss about her technical incompetence (politely), she might get sacked. She's a good tech support as long as she still has her trusty manuals by her, she can fix specific problems. But when it comes to unknown tech to her, she assumed she knew.
If I tell her about her weaknesses, however constructive I can get and as politely as I can get, all the while complimenting something about her, showing her how to improve herself, maybe she'll do better not to ask silly questions like buying a Puppet certificate? At least getting rid of ignorance would definitely help but not sure how she would take it. The worst thing I would imagine is her backfiring and yelling at me and then we ended up fighting.
If I kept quiet and tuck it all into a can, it will eventually implode as we go on.
This is not about her gender. I don't see her as a woman. I see her as a tech support engineer who should know her stuff.1 -
My web app is working on local and not online
🤯😲😲😲😲
How is it possible?
AJAX Call not working.
Not sending data😟13 -
I remember some years ago a phone call between my boss and a customer.
The customer wanted a website from us, and my boss told him what it would aproximately cost (it wasn't very much).
Customer got upset and said "How can it be so expensive? You're not saving lifes, are you?"
It never came to a contract, and I now work at a real company ...2 -
Anyone here uses scaleway VPS?
The tickets I raised got deleted without any proper resolution. And that is shady AF. The tickets were attended by some customer support guy and he had told he would call to verify. But that never happened.
And now all the tickets I raised has disappeared.
I can't activate my account because phone verification is not possible since the code they never arrives3 -
"Longest you worked without rest + why?" (2)
Oh, I am an idiot 🙂! 7 hours isn't nearly the longest I've worked without rest (see my previous rant.) I just remembered working non-stop almost for a day in the past.
It was for an annual 48-hour hackathon where people gathered to make games.
It made me promise myself not to work excessively long hours non-stop. My creativity level was way below the ground, and during the after-party, my body sort of kernel-panicked, and I started to become incoherent. I had to call a taxi to find my way home that day.
For the following years, I made sure to get some rest (e.g., go home at night to sleep, spend the lunch break time actually having 'lunch break' and not coding while you're at it, etc.) because I did not want to wreck myself any further. -
Fellow ranters, I need some advice.
Work at an early stage startup to build their initial product(let's call it X) or work at slightly established startup with funding(let's call it Y)?
Both have their own benefits.
Working at X:
- I have equity (and a co founder position) thus chances of high rewards if the startup is successful.
- I get to build the whole product from scratch (great learning experience).
Working at Y:
- Don't know much about the company but I get a decent stable income.
- Work with a team (although a small one).
- Job security.
I'm currently in my final year and have given up on campus placements. Moreover, I'm not interested in wasting my time in pointless interview preparations. So I figured that startup is the way to go.7 -
Fuck my company, sincerly.
So Im crunching my ass off, to make product, there is +- fuckton of changes that for example require refactoring flow of certain things, restructure of how shit work, Im +- 2nd weekend now, and most heavy features are cleared.
I work till late. constantly I have someone with stupid shit like calls, indeed Im needed for that stuff but also, that slows down progress of this project. Just sake of example friday 18:00 I had call (I work till 16:00) about new minor and frankly easy feature. Today, morning 8:30 one call, than 13:00 long call, Ive done the feature, didn't push it to alpha. yet though.
Now during that call that started 13:00 I get yelled on that all ordered features aren't on prod yet (I throw them to alpha becouse manual tests must be done as standard here).
Dude what the motherfuck. Im literally wearing my ass off to deliver your stupid product becouse I know its critical for company but it does not mean I can do it all in one fucking night.
F**k off and shut your mouth up and let me work for f**k sakes.
Ah also, stop f**king remotely micromanage me you little piece of sh*t.
Thanx for allowing me to vent out,
Peace.2 -
Talked with a recruiter a few times. He kept presenting jobs that were 1.5 hours away, despite how many times I told him specifically my car would not make it that far regularly.
I eventually started ignoring his calls and emails... Until he called my mom, and a former boss (reference), leaving messages with them to call him back. I don't even know how he got my mom's number.
I wrote him a very clear email after that and haven't heard from him since.1 -
I write code as part of my job but also tend to have a lot of pet projects I think about in my spare time. A lot of those projects are not specifically targeted at solving an actual real problem but are just a curiosity (like my Duktape/ECMAScript thing that could import and call DLL routines.) I often find it difficult to choose which one to continue working on and end up not working on any of them because I can't decide which one is more interesting at the time! Or I get stuck and struggle to find a way around whatever roadblock I've hit.1
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ugh, company discussion on WhatsApp sucks. i want to take a leave from this new company i joinedbas i am bored the hell out
the company policy is that we got 16 pl 7 mandatory leaves and 8 emergency leaves. pretty good deal i guess. but as a new joiner, i am on probabtion for 6 months and I can't take either of those mandatory/paid leaves.
i was neck deep in work so could not get time to call my manager. plus had a 1 hour incredibly boring and frustrating call with another 50 yo tech lead from another team who was goin on an on like a 90 yo uncle with his wartime stories so could not think straight.
i sent my manager a "hey a***" at 7.08 pm on WhatsApp.
that's a great shoot oneself in the foot situation. i could not call because it's 7.08 pm, and don't wanna give an impression of a corporate non living dev who makes or supports making calls at odd hours. i also can't dele6 the message coz that would be more awkward
but i had went with the creepy hey text , and didn't wanna keep him waiting, so quickly add anothe message with the context : "i wanted to discuss a small leave related query, will call tomorrow"
another classic shoot oneself in the foot.
the probation guy wants to take leaves? he doesn't have any, what could he talk about it? oh right, i was gonna cheese him to give me an informal permission. but now i made it all formal.
noice :/9 -
Cable/Internet outage. Tried to contact ISP (Mediacom, who are awful)... Reported outage over an hour ago, but no update.
So, I figure it's time to call then...
In support app, selected "Call someone now." Selected sevices. Drop-down for "Tap down arrow for list"... contains the single placeholder "Tap down arrow for list". Plus, of course, you cannot submit the form without making a selection from the list.
Fuck your fucking support app right in the java-hole, Mediacom.
I did not need any more reasons to hate you - you are already at the top of my list, with no one else remotely close behind.3 -
I was about to have a screenshare presentation of a month-long work over Skype...
Hours before the presentation I got bored and upgraded from Xorg to Wayland for some reason the universe doesn't want to disclose...
Tried to call a friend to check if everything is working and the screenshare feature was missing! 😑 I thought Skype fucked up, tried Hangouts, still not working, tried praying to saint Ubuntu to somehow please let it work one time. It did fucking not.
My gosh, 30 minutes before the presentation and I was preparing the whole environment on Windows. I had never felt so stressed in my life! 😰
Investigating after the presentation informed me that screensharing only works on XOrg, not on Wayland.
Worst last-minute decision ever. *#-##-:$;"+3($(!#@/)#9"+(2(#1 -
My manager was asking for a whiteboard cleaner(duster as we call it). He said ‘duster’ and put his right hand in forth of me. He was obviously expecting me to offer him the duster. I thought he wants to shake hands. And we shook hands..
hope he didn’t realise what was going on. I was not drunk at that time. But just a bit hangover.2 -
oh shit oh shit oh shit...
Do to my horrible anxiety about covid-19 I have not been calling into stands up in the last 2 weeks or doing much work.
My boss just messaged asking if everything is okay.
First msg I said yes and sorry was having techinal difficulty.
Then I msged him back saying it would better if we talked. I can see he is on a conference call so no response.
Should I be honest or list fake technical reasons?
He is pretty cool boss but only been there since October.11 -
As if I fucking care if you have to add another parameter to my function call. Just because you think it's easier, does not mean its more usefull.
It's inconsistent as F U C K
You code IS spaghetti code. Your logic is closer a maze on a fucking one way street and I don't fucking care if it works. It's a pain1 -
Working for a little SharePoint-Company while studying.
Have to hunt bugs.
Found a major bug which kills one of our customers SharePoint-Site completely because of code pasta.
Told my supervisor about the bug and reported it.
"yeh. we will fix it now"
2h later they started to go live.
"Did you fix the bug?"
"No. Wanted to have the system live asap."
On my way home I got a call.
"We need you back here in the office"
"Why?"
"It crashed. Is not reachable anymore. Help fixing it"
fuck off -
I want out!
I am an Indian student, graduating in 5 months with bad GPA from not so fancy university. I like to call myself highly motivated individual. I am looking for a job in Silicon Valley.
What skill sets should I prep myself for a job in the United States right after I graduate?
I have enough skills to get placed in Mid-Tier companies. I can spend my rest of the days learning and hyper-focusing to get an job in the Silicon Valley.
My priority is USA>Netherlands>Ireland>India.
I can provide more details as required. Help me out!16 -
I overheard a phone call between my project manager & my CEO yesterday in the office. This is what my project manager said on the phone: "I find it weird that we sell stuff we are not sure if it is exists and if it exists, we are not sure how it works"6
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JsonLint ParsingException "composer.json does not contain valid JSON" is an incorrect statement. The file contains 99% valid JSON except for 1 incorrect character which is correctly pointed out as an "Invalid string, it appears you have an unescaped backslash at: \-dev".
And why do people in tutorials keep calling it "Jay's on" instead of "Jason" like "Jackson"? I can only imagine what they would call the "King of Pop" musician ... "my cal Jack's Onn"?6 -
!dev
So, today until Sunday, a fairly general strike is going on based on how our government wants to set up our pension or something..
Now I have to call and wake up my friggin' dad to bring me to work, and probably come and get me too...
That's not all, even.. most people still go to work by car, generating a lot of traffic...
Will I be too late at work today? Probably.
Fucking A! -
Rant/question:
httpDoSmth1().subscribe(x =>
...then(y =>
httpDoSmth2(x).subscribe(z =>
//do smth with z
return z
)
)
)
Isn't this (not my code) callback hell all over again? The 2. http call expects results from the 1. http call. I feel like this could be solved cleaner using async await/switchMap/etc. ... but not like this.13 -
CRONS :(
I have some module which is not working at all, It is written as cron and now I don't have idea How to debug that
I miss office :(
This WFH sucks
I could have taken the help from my seniors But in WFH they just leave the messages after seen or on call --> Network problem -> talk to you later :(5 -
I really hate when stakeholders treat me like an idiot. No, I didn’t change the existing logic of the website. It wasn’t discussed in the scope, so why would I touch it? Stakeholder, you “double checking” like this is demeaning and will only cause me to refuse future requests from you. Plus, you were at the meeting when we discussed scope, so there should be no questioning my intelligence like this.
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Fuck you google. Fuck you and your "you can only use my shit everywhere and if you have another account you can suck it's cock, but I'm not gonna accomodate it" attitude.
I can't even import my outlook contacts into the "google" contacts app, which is the only contacts app on my phone.
You actually mean that I gotta export my outlook contacts physically and then import them into your ass-tarded contacts platform to see even see them, let alone call them up?
Fuck. You.
Can someone please suggest alternatives/work arounds?5 -
Starting my bachelors in Computer Science this fall! Going to try to continue to work full time as long as possible (I’m a team lead at a call center, got a lot of downtime, not too stressful) to pay for school. Any tips for CS in college?2
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By far it is my current project of building the industry leading CMMS (no it's not a typo, it's really CMMS). Everything from in office time management, to tracking when techs go on site, to detecting what are in pictures when sent back from our app (also my project), to sentence building, to smart auto-dispatching.... I mean this list is just endless of the features compiled in the application for just a call center. When I took the job I never knew facilities maintenance took so much and I never thought it would be this efficient.2
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I suspected my partner was cheating with her colleague at work, but was not 100% sure about it. I could not acees her mobile
phone because she had a lock on it. I reached out to this great hacker who remotely hacked her phone and i coukd read all her
text messages , whatsapp messages , call logs , photo gallery and i saw all her escapades with different guys.
I immediately filed for a divorce and moved on with my life. you can also spy on your partner if you send an email to
ACETEAMHACKERS @ GMAIL DOT COM. -
i hate it when Im coding and my friends joke around and call me a hacker or nerd when they couldn't even print anything if i told them how to do it plus its not hacking if you believe its hacking when im typing code on python or c# online then you need to go back to school6