Was originally hired for 3 months.

Just finished the project 2 weeks ago, after 1.5 years.

I fucking hate data science now.

Manager: I just think you are being too negative. Like sometimes other people have opinions too and we should hear them out before saying no.

Me: Well your opinion is the devs shouldn't be able to estimate their own tasks and you should decide on our behalf how long something should take.

You also want to decide what tech stack we use, because you followed a "Hello World" tutorial last night and it worked out for you.

Just because you got a simple webpage up and running in 2 hours doesn't mean all websites take 2 hours with the tech. Were not sitting in the corner laughing that you think its taking us 3 weeks to build this.

I'm not being negative simply because I don't agree with you. I'm not being unreasonable if I say I can do 6 weeks work in 2 weeks. And although it sounds offensive, i'm actually doing you a favour by telling you to get your head out of your ass

Waiting for those dev rant stickers

Who needs Legacy Code to f*ck up your day when you can't understand the code you wrote 2 weeks ago

When you've got 4 personal projects to finish, 2 computers to build, 1 full-time job to wrap up, an online course to complete, Uni starts in two weeks and your family decided it's the perfect time to go on vacation.

It's 2:30 am and this is my life.

Just got an email that i dodnt get a job.

But guys... Your 'selection process' took a month. A literal month. I already got an other job 2 weeks ago.

Client: I need this *insert app/machine/thing* ASAP! No excuses!

*work overtime just to get it done*

*after 2 weeks of finishing it*

Me: So has the thing worked without issues?
Client: Oh, I haven’t even used it yet!

:/

Immediately start doing a project way beyond your level, and within 2 weeks you'll learn things that would take college 2 years to teach you.

Client hasn’t responded to my questions for over 2 weeks, so I close her ticket.

”Why the hell did you close the ticket!? The problem still exists!”

Sorry, I’m not a mind reader..

I'm supposed to take a work-related online course which you pay for monthly. My boss asked me to start it now, but I'm going on vacation in 2 weeks, so I told him it's a pity to pay for a month when I'm only available for 2 weeks.
He was like, but can't you continue the course-work on your vacation?

fellow from the team was asked to do the estimate by manager - he said 2 weeks

then manager asked what if we add one more developer - he said, again 2 weeks and maybe add day or two

I was asked same question without knowing that they already asked fellow from the team same question - I said around two weeks, maybe day or two more! XD

as manager was confused and not satisfied with the estimates, goes to our team leader with the same questions - team leader said - 2 and half weeks and if you add one more dev to it, 3 weeks minimum

we didn't know that all of us were asked as manager did that behind our backs, in the end manager learned lesson in greed as we got to stick to team leaders estimate!

also that was very rude of underestimating someone's ability, same manager did had personal bias and frequently mocked us, for example when we said that that we will implement ML for cropping images at the right place (ie. crop part of the image where the face is) on the backend. Response was something like: 'You guys will do the ML? Are you shitting me? You're not /insert FANG company/!'

best team win ever!

second best team win ever is when whole team left the company in matter of weeks

That moment when my boss and I were having a conversation (2 weeks into my new job) and she tells me her daughters name is "Amber" and I jump up with, "oh snap!! That's my dogs name too!!" 😑

After 2 weeks in vacation, first day back on my job, I spend 2 hours trying to remember my Ubuntu password.

Relaxation is not good!

Client: I need this very complex feature

Dev : Ok, give me approx 2 weeks, this is new to me, have to do r&d.

Client: I can't give you 2 weeks, you have 2 days.

Dev: Somehow manages to complete in 2 days.

After few weeks.

Client's representative : What's the progress on the new features?

Dev: You haven't mentioned any new features yet.

Client's representative: I don't care, it's been weeks now, here are more complex features, I need them tomorrow.

😕

When your boss says "good job, you have developed something big in such a small time" (~2 weeks) but you haven't showed him the bugs and shit (gonna fix it btw)

Removed a bug 2 weeks ago.
Customer calls today and wants to have it back.
The error miscalculated a sum.
🤷
When you thought you saw everything...

#1
Thinking Edge might actually be the next new browser.

And then using it for a few weeks.

#2
Not documenting my code 😥

Boss: we picked up a new client!
Me: nice!
Boss: They want the unfinished software we were working on that we planned to be done 2 months from now.
Me: even better!
Boss: They want it in 3 weeks.
Me:
Me:
Me: no.

After 2 weeks of node, I go back to my buddy python. Write some code. Get tons of errors.

This is what I did at at least 10 places. 😔😑

My boss is making me deploy a major change what hasn't had proper testing yet on the day I leave for 2 weeks. Save me someone.

Somebody asked me my API doc.
I don't have any API at all.

I will lie, and I'll write a swagger specification in few hours and I'll send them.

They will try to read it and understand, and after maybe a week, when they will ask for testing and endpoint I'll pretend to be on holiday for 2 weeks.

3-4 weeks gone already, I checked they should be on holiday by then. Only then, I'll answer with a fake endpoint with fake data.

I'll get another 2 weeks if I'm lucky.
When they discover about fake data, I'll say there is a bug.

In total if I play well, I have 2/2.5 months to implement some kind of API server with some more or less true implementation.

Thanks to Swagger. Swag

2 weeks 😄😂

We want a web site.

We're going to want lots of interactive content, which we'll define later.

You need to develop the whole thing in 2 weeks.

We'll give you all the details after you tell us exactly how much it will cost.

"We are expecting you to start working asap..and complete the frontend (of a webapp that's​ expected to take 2 months to develop) in 2 weeks "

" So do I expect to get paid X amount for this ?"

" Let's make that X/2"

Fuck off you dipshits.. You expect quality work and fast work ..then get ready to pay at least by market standards.

Current state of devRant for the past ~2 weeks in regards to GDPR and GitHub.

"Hey ,we just hired a developer to work on app A ,so you can stop working on it and focus on B"

**2 weeks later **
"It's been 2 weeks.Why haven't you finished A already?"

When I'm hearing the CEO promising new impossible features in the next 2 weeks.

@StefanH This still hasn't been resolved, 2 weeks later

I broke the toilet seat on day 2 at the office and have been watching it get worse and worse until it silently got replaced two weeks later.

Oops.

When the doctor says "take this and comeback in 2 weeks" he is literally debugging his solution in your body.

I'm a bit freaked out.

An old conversation with a former Team Lead (TL)

TL: The client has requested for a feature. Can you provide an effort estimation.

(gives estimation with task breakdown)

TL: 2 weeks? They wants it in 3 days!

Me:

Overheard my boss speaking at the pantry.
He tells the sales to promote to potential buyers that our product will only take 2 days to setup but actually the dev team has been alloted 2 weeks.

How the in fuck could we deliver 2 weeks worth of effort in 2 days!? WTF boss. Fuck you, and your double chin. I am tired of your shit.

On my first dev job ever, I got sent to the client's office after studying CSS on my own for 2 weeks.
Client: "So, you're the great expert your manager told me about?"

The freelancer...
We are looking for someone to design a logo with no less than 2 years Javascript, 10 years Intel IO low level engineering in assembly, 2 months pascal, 14 weeks of HTML5, 17.23567 years of ASCII C, and you must have a half pint of strawberry ice cream in your freezer. $20.00 firm.

Been off work for the last 2 weeks, got a text yesterday and apparently everything was manic. Kind of nice to know everything falls apart when I'm not there ;)

I worked as a sysadmin. I was taking over a position from another, who’d stop 2 weeks after I started, so he introduced me to everything in those days.

In the company we were 2 people (3 the first 2 weeks) managing servers. When rebooting windows servers and windows asked for a reason for rebooting, he told me that he always wrote -.- while the other guy wrote .-. so they could recognize who rebooted the server

*During last week's meeting*
Me: That update should be out in 2 weeks.
Client: Okay
*2 days later*
Client: So where's that update?

Boss: how long would it take you to make an app with this tool you have never seen before?
Me: idk, I've never used that.
Boss: OK so how long?
Me:.. Uh.. 3 weeks?
Boss: you got 2 weeks. Start tomorrow.
Me:... OK then..
Inner me: why does he even ask?
...Fml

I worked on a web project a few years ago. I've refactored a large part of the architecture, added repositories to the business layer, implemented inversion of control and dependency injection etc. (took me 2 weeks).

There was a second developer in the project... he didn't understand the design patterns and the whole IoC/DI thing. Instead of asking or reading about it, he reverted all the changes while I was 3 weeks on vacation -.-

I have an interview with one of the big 4 in 2 weeks.

The post is for a java dev, they contacted me even though I'm a PHP dev.

I know the interview questions will be in java... What do I do??? :-(

I worked with java for the last time 2 years ago...

So, went to 3 hackathons in the last 3 weeks. Won 2/3. Developed on Ethereum and some Iota for the most part. Loved this experience and many more to go. Idk what to say honestly, just blabbering :p

So it's 2 weeks past launch day... And we are still not close to launching.

Sigh...

We're 2 months away from going live.

This has repeated for several weeks now :

Monday : 17 issues (aka bugs, incomplete features)

Work work work.

Friday : 7 issues
Nice. Lets get a good weekend rest and finished this next week.

Next Monday : 17 issues.
QA found some new bugs or some already resolved issues came back with different details.

...and repeat. Exact numbers, plusminus 1 or 2.

Inb4 2 question ahead

1. So in another 2 weeks I’ll be getting a new storage to upgrade my laptop, and since I will be developing C# both MVC and ASP.net should I stick to windows or there is a linux distro I could try using. Probably will dual booth if I have to use windows, so friendly linux is nice

2. For the storage I’ll be getting 860 EVO 250gb, any feedback? Also 4gb ram for the upgrade

Gave in 2 months notice to my office. Situation in nutshell:

me: Im leaving in 8 weeks guys.
manager: ok
me: hey landlord im leaving in 8 weeks
landlord:ok
manager: can u leave in 4 weeks?
me: ok I can leave in 4 weeks.
landlord: ok
manager: hey we are not sure maybe we can keep u for 8 weeks. we will let you know.
me: DECIDE FOR FUCKS SAKE, MY DEPOSIT IS ON THE LINE AND I AM UNABLE TO PLAN ANYTHING SADDSAKO;;LSADKLDSK;ADSFDSFSDFDSFSFSDFDSFDSDFSFDSFDSFDSADASKLDSAKDSS

So I'm trying my hand at home brewing beer. I started my first batch 2 weeks ago, and finally bottled it last night. It should be ready in another 2 weeks! I can't wait to try it; it smells delicious 🍺

Anybody else know that horrible feeling when you're 2 weeks and 1000 lines of spaghetti into what started as a 2 day 200 line side project that was supposed to make your main project better, but has now become it's own life consuming beast?

@linuxxx went from 50k to 70k ++ in few weeks. Amd here am I with 390 after one year on devRant with my rants getting <10 ++ and 0-2 comments.

To those wondering what it's like to onboard to CORP projects:

> create an access request for role APP1_ADMIN_RW
> wait for 2 weeks
> chase for approvals
> chase for implementation
> be ignored for another 1 week
> 3 weeks later receive an email: "your request has been implemented. Now you have access to role APP1_USER_RO"

Came home after 2 weeks,( to see) ants raided everywhere, the up-side is my spiders had a feast...

Installed Xubuntu on my laptop

Laptop found dead after 2 weeks.

When your boss resigns, so you have to learn everything he knows in 2 weeks... 😰

Estimations:

2 days = One day of actual coding, one day of doing something completely unrelated.
3 days = One week
5 days = Two weeks
7 days = Forget about it...

Estimating the task. A total of... 2 months.

Other guy: I think we should squeeze it to 1 month.
Others: I think we should squeeze it in 2 weeks to meet the deadline..

Deadline: 2 weeks
Progress:25%

"Hi can you make an app for me? I can't pay you yet but I'll give you 25% stock options. It'll take like 2 weeks right?"

Management : We need to deliver this by September!!!

Meanwhile every dev took 2-3 weeks of vacation in August.

Trying to plant something:
- be aware of the pH
- the plant loves sun, but not too much
- fertilize it every 2 Weeks
...
Dear Nature, how the hell did you accomplish all these for centuries?

I often find that deadlines are "conjured up" with no bearing on the tasks at hand. It has to be done by this date because the Client goes to France for 2 weeks. Piss off.

That horrible feeling when you have to abandon your small project because litteraly nothing works... Even after 2 straight weeks of work, on a single f***ing function... Fml

Twilio literally broke my integration because I have not logged into its portal for 2 weeks. Got notified by users complaining SMS wasn’t going through.

When you see your code 2 weeks later and you don't understand it.
//FirstRant

2 weeks into my new company and this old dev wants me as tutor already.

Feeling blessed yet stressed.

Just finished a project that was estimated to be 8 weeks long with 2 devs. I was given the project 2 weeks ago with no one else to work with. It's going to a few hundred thousand users tomorrow.

Still underpaid and stressing over rent.

Definitely still not getting that salary adjustment...

Fuck this shit. 😐

My first project at the job was implenting a website, designed by the same company we mostly worked with.
It was very stressful because half of the 2 months calculated for finishing the project, these genius designers needed for their design. Until then, I had almost no tasks to do...
When the designs finally came, I worked on it and two weeks later was a meeting for review and to decide about some details.
These fuckers then concluded, that the whole design did not fit the page and that they would rework it.
Two weeks later, on the planned release day, we finally received it. A completely fucking different design! Wow!
My boss was pretty angry and so was I. We had to move the release 4 weeks ahead, the client was pissed like a stinking hobo and it needed a lot of convincing to keep that client...

It's fucking nerve-wracking as well that we always have to wait in most projects for weeks for clients or designers to add the content before we can publish a website.
They don't seem to care if they have 2 months or 2 weeks, we never were able to release one single project on time, because of these lazy fuckers...

damn its really hard to get back in the flow after not touching any work for 2 weeks

Not seen girlfriend in 2 weeks. Been here less than a minute and she's ignoring me for facebook. At least I have devRant!

Just found this in an ancient code after a 2 weeks break
God I hate myself...

Our team spent 2 continues weeks working on deadline, without going home, doing all our activities in the company, learning from each other, nd developing great apps. Once upon a time.

Xiaomi makes you wait for 360 hours before they can allow you to unlock their phone's bootloader! Now I'm just seated here dealing with bloatware as I wait for 2 weeks to do a 30 second operation. It's 2018, come on!

Steeling crime in our office
My mug is stolen and being used by a colleague
I am suspecting the newbies that started 2 weeks ago

Hey DevRanters,

You are tasked with living without tech in any shape or form (Lets say, for 2 weeks).

How you approaching it?

Highschool teacher tells us to work on a little text game, gives us 2 weeks. I wrote about 1600 lines of code with enemys, random map, fighting system,... And generally blowing everything out of proportion as always, because I'm so bored

I've made 200 dollars in 2 weeks with fiverr back in the days. Completely fucken drunken all the time.

Not much money, but a very nice experience :D

It's been 2 weeks please merge my PR

It is 10th December, but this "issue" was not fixed in 2 weeks (as screen says, happened 25th November). Noone bats an eye.

Some mother fucker parked his car in my parking lot...and it's lying there for more than 2 weeks...

Got released from the miltary after 3 years of CyberSecurity/Sysadmin role.

2 weeks layer I got a job as security sysadmin in a large telco company.

Still wish to be dev instead though

When you have 9 pull requests that have been sitting in the queue for the past 2 weeks

Them: How long do you need to do this
Me: 2-4 Weeks
Them: Great! You have 6 Days

Happy 'Nowrooz' everyone. It's persian new year.
2 weeks holiday. The best time for personal projects. yooohooo

2 weeks, designing a Connect4 game gui for C/C++ using Qt5 with 9 other coders...

9... 🙆🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️

So my company set up environment for docker and bablabla manually . WHAT? and a new employee took 2 weeks to configure everything.

So I decided to do some automation, a script to auto cnfigure, download , blablabla, all the new guy have to do is run the script (regardless of OS) and that save two weeks time. Everything configured just took 4 hours (the project is 3 GB) automatically.

omg

Question.

Would you work 100 hour weeks?

I just read that some developers of game company Rockstar had to work 100 hour weeks because of a deadline for Red Dead Redemption 2.

“We were working 100-hour weeks [several times in 2018],” lead writer Dan Houser explained.

So... would you accept or refuse?

Client asked for time line for website I told them 6 weeks from moment they provide design (I had other active projects and would have to split time between them ) . For next 4 weeks they would send me design and then after few hours tell me to stop working and that they are going to change design.
After 4 weeks they sent me final version of the design and informed me that it needs to be done in next 2 weeks. We expected 10 more websites from them and it was 7-8 pages so I put other projects on hold and finished it in around week and sent link to them for review, 2 days before deadline they informed me that there are around 20 pages missing pages that are not in final version of design but only in version xx sent more than 2 weeks ago. In next day and half me and 2 other developers had more then 20 hours each to finish it on time

Hi.. one month ago i started to learn JavaScript (my first programming language)
In the 2nd proyect we create a Data dashboard i do my very best effort to create Js funcional code and other 2 girls works in css and html.
Im really proud of my work (1st time!)
A few guys told me JavaScript is awful and difficult but in a few weeks we will start in jquery.
In 2 weeks im gonna participate in Angelhack Santiago Hackathon 2018
I need an advice for me its a really big step

> great exciting project
> you have 1 to 2 weeks or we lose 200 million dollars

Bruh

Each sprint lasts for 2 weeks. But I get the basic info to start working on my stories only when 3/4th of the sprint is completed....

So yeah....no one gives shit about estimation at least in my case.

So I finished all my tasks for the sprint (3-weeks long) in the first 2 days.
Shit that happens when senior team members underestimate your abilities...

!rant
The only good thing of having to wait two weeks for a new Doctor episode...
2 Doctor episodes to see in a row...

Worked at a big company as firmware dev a few years ago (less than 2) but switched cause of bad pay. Joined a consulting firm with better pay and bemefits. In 2 weeks I am going back to the old company but as a consultat... they should have just payed me and we could have avoided this :D

Just casually learning if I don't fix a bunch of stuff I know nothing about in a technology I have never touched within 2 weeks the company loses a 100k contract.

Should book holiday.

2 weeks til deadline and you're only at 10% of project

So I decided to positively tackle the negative energy surrounding me these past few days. I tried to be productive. I went overboard, of course. Where is the fun in normal?

I wrote down all the urgent tasks I must die-die finish. Anyone closed with Asians will know the severity of the die-die and must combo. I started with tasks I have to finish in 3 days. Then in a week. Then in 2 weeks. I ended up creating more than 25 cards across my respective Trello boards.

The tasks that come to me always need minimum 3,4 working hours. Literally. The furthest deadline I see is Oct 15. The tasks I counted is more than 25. No appointments nor meetings were counted yet. It is not impossible. If I finish 2 tasks per day, 14 days is enough to complete all. I might have to continuously work 2 whole weeks of course. But it is still fine, right? Right, guys? Right? It's doable. Right?

I won't get any unskippable appointment within this 2 weeks. Right?

I won't get new tasks to finish within this 2 weeks. Right?

I won't have to guide other people how to do their tasks within this 2 weeks. Right?

I won't have to work other people's tasks when they absent within this 2 weeks. Right?

I won't have to entertain any annoying client because customer service team can't deal within this 2 weeks. Right?

I won't have to do other personal tasks within this 2 weeks. Right? (Like helping with creating a wedding slideshow for a friend marrying on Oct 28)

My life is totally fine. Right?

Find another job before February.
Try not to lose it in 2 weeks.

So....
I was asked to transfer a spaghetti Android/iOS project to xamarin for a bank client yesterday because "that's what they use".

This is a crm/loyalty app that has been around for 2+ years now (you can imagine the mess). On top of that I have no knowledge of c#, .net or xamarin.

So I ask: "When is this supposed to be delivered?"

Boss: "It was scheduled for 2 weeks ago but let's say 2 weeks from now"

Me: "..... This is a huge remake it won't be even close to ready in 2 weeks"

Boss: "Let's check on the progress in 2 weeks and see how it goes"

Why is it hard for bosses to provide an actual timeframe???

He's been pulling the same crap with junior devs for years and of course they get nervous and create more spaghetti code...

Anyway long story short (not) I have an interview Monday!

Let's hope it's not more of the same!

P.S.: to junior devs: When you are given a deadline... IGNORE IT.

So testing starts in 2 weeks ... lets change the api and micro manage the UI before that 🙄

My first Dev job only lasted 2 weeks. That's about it.

>be me
>go to a job interview
>company said to wait 1.5 weeks
>wait 2 weeks, after that ,I message them
>the company writes back, tells me they haven't decided on a candidate yet
>two days later the company writes me a letter asking me if I'm interested in a fulltime position, and if yes they will send me more info
>I reply yes
>they don't respond in 3 days
>successfully troll a candidate

The feeling I got after spending 2 weeks for a project in Vietnam...

Be me

Need to fetch data from a website for project I'm working on

Look for an API with no luck

Spend 2 weeks developing a ridiculously overengineered and slow webscraping program with Selenium

Find an API

Fuck this

2 weeks and i leave my job.

Pro: no more dealing-with-math-msc-students

Con: i want to keep that juicy cluster to run my own calculations ;_;

!rant
3 weeks ago started to play diablo 2 again.
Just realised it's not a 3D game .
Progammers had done a brilliant job !

2 weeks before release of my App.
Have implemented nearly all major features.

Everytime I tell myself ah I can work tomorrow. What am I doing instead? Fucking Gaming lol.

Motivation is a bitch...

Weather is changing so frequently.

I'm switching since 1 1/2 weeks between being tired, no sleep, migraine.

On top of that I have to unclog a multilayer cache architecture based on varnish.

My brain poof.

Plus a lot of management tasks.... And planning.

I just want to enter a hibernation mode and sleep for 3-4 weeks.

Please?

It's looks like this weeks "Weekly Group Rant" is trolling all the developers who have side projects that never finished.

1. CMS like WordPress
2. MVC framework like Laravel
3. Android App like Tinder
and... list goes on.

#1, #2 and few others are still stuck on index page.

Leaving my current job, after being there for 10 years straight after uni, in 2 weeks! I have now been taken out of development and have to somehow write confluence docs of all my knowledge... Fml

When I was made redundant (business I was working for collapsed) 5 days before Xmas and 2 weeks before birth of my first child, with no pay, no redundancy package or anything.

Good times.

Why is that when a project deadline has only 2 weeks left, Project Managers starts the project then. Why not start the project when we have 3 or 4 months left for the deadline?

Our Project Manager has this lame attitude that she will start with the sitemap, wire-frame and designing of a website when we have only 2 weeks to the deadline.

What the fuck is going on in here?

me at home :
😎i am a cool Scala Developer
me at work :
boss : can u edit this Scala Application ?
me : what is the scala ?
boss : its a programming language
me : okay just give me 2 weeks for learning

2 weeks in my new job. I started hating the work. I'm stuck working on legacy systems. This guys don't work on latest technologies.

I've been seeing this single fucking post in LinkedIn for like 2-3 weeks.

Their sorting algorithm is so fucked up.

Usually I'd go grab a smoke and coffee and think up a solution while smoking.
I quit smoking 2 weeks ago, no idea how to fix it now.

All the paperwork is done, I'm going to join a faang-tier company, can't wait to get started!!

But first I have to endure 2 weeks at the shit show...

Me : There is a hotfix needs to be done.

Boss : So what ?

Me : Its assigned to you from last 2 weeks and deadlines are near.

Boss: (speaking politely) oh.. is it? Can you take a look ?

Me : ..

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK FUCK YOU GOOGLE, you placed a damn email about an interview in the spam box and I only realized it 2 weeks afterwards. END ME, JUST DO IT NOW

spent 3 weeks with not more than 20 hours sleep per week on programming a mobile Chat Application. after finally 1 more week of bug fixing and testing and redesigning UI, App works like a charm! Most beautiful thing I ever created, my close friends are all astonished.
Happily I uploaded it on Playstore, 2 weeks later -> no downloads :(

myTechLead: We have to use Deno to this.

Dev: What about rails?

mTL: Deno, I said.

2 Weeks later: How can we deploy this stuff?

Apparently someone posted on Apple's developer forum 2 weeks ago about this root privilege escalation vulenerability in macOS but it took a viral tweet to get any action. 😐

After 2 weeks I really like it here on devrant... And its mostly because we all somewhat face the same shit together today, every day. And still we continue.

That is what dev is all about 😃

Client asked me to complete the job as fast as I can and, here I am, waiting for the review of the latest version for the past 2 WEEKS.

Good thing, she paid up the entire amount beforehand. *Rubs hands in glee*

After 2 weeks of being unemployed, I finally got a job offer today and accepted! New title is Automation Specialist

Pm: Hey we need you to add this feature to client ABC and we need it in 3 weeks.

Me: Ok. Just so I know how long have you know about this?

Pm: Oo about 3 weeks ago.

Me(outside): Ok 😐😐😐

Me(inside): Really you could give me some information about this 3 weeks ago. Even 2 weeks ago would have been find. AHHHHHHHHHHH!😡😡😡😤.

The sinking feeling you get when you have looked forward to working on your project for a week and your gf tells you that the inlaws will wisit on your only free days in 2 weeks.. Please aliens take me awayyyy.

Oh my God I didn't even noticed I crossed 1000++ in just 2 weeks of newly activated me! Over 400++ in fucking 2 WEEEKKKSS!!!

THANK YOU GUYS I LOVE YOU

Applyed for internship for an American company in Japan. Email said I will interview with 3 people at most, 1h each, back to back, and everything will be in English.
But on the day they said I will interview with 4 people, and everything was in Japanese.
They said they will tell me the results within 2 weeks, but got rejected after 3 weeks.

Take responsibility for what you say guys...

- have a look at the project
- brake it down into smaller stories
- estimate the time
- multipy it with 1.5
- add 1-3 days of testing
- add 15% project management
- add a 2 days buffer

= be happy with being done in 2 weeks, present it in 4

3 weeks.

Am I just stupid? It took me 3 whole weeks to finally come to the realisation today that the Elasticsearch "guide" and Elasticsearch "reference" were different, with different version numbers. I've been ignoring Google search results that say Elasticsearch 2.x for WEEKS and wondering why I couldn't find a solution to simple problems.

Turns out, the current Elasticsearch "guide" is on version 2.x while Elasticsearch itself is on version 6.x.

They even have almost identical URLs that go ../guide/../reference and ../guide/../guide.

WHY? Why would you do that? Am I just stupid? Am I still getting it wrong? What the heck is up with Elasticsearch documentation?

New 2 weeks notice: "for
the next 2 weeks you're gonna notice
that I'm not here"

when you designed UI for last 2 weeks, then show it to your boss and he's like "nope, I changed my mind"... fml

Tech Lead : Tomorrow need to send QA
.
.
After 2 weeks
Tech Lead : Tomorrow need to send QA °.°

The first day back to work after almost 2 weeks off...

And Slack is down. Time to make it a 2 weeks + 1 day vacation.

I'm tempted at some point to get a non-dev job. After about 2 weeks I could automate everything then just slack off.

"we need to reduce the amount of meetings" said the super-duper senior enterprise manager who invited me to 20 meetings for the next 2 weeks.

To be honest, I haven't figured out yet what he is actually doing 💅

My new co-worker, a Jr. developer who started 2 weeks ago told me; "I am starting to see in my dreams the solutions of my tasks."

"Welcome to the club.", I said. :P

You work like a dog during 2 weeks of sprint, to hear from your P.O on the end that you did not delivered anything. Because he found 1 bug.

I just hate my project manager ! :(

my project manager asked me to create the new UI for a running angular project and been given 2 weeks to do so.

I started working on it 2 weeks ago but he kept asking me to work on changes asked by clients on other projects during those 2 weeks and I did as he wanted. I informed him that our new UI is delaying because of these rapid changes and he replied "Its ok ! The deadline shall be changed. I will manage it. At this time, these fixes are much more important."

I said "Alright" at that time.

But Today He is saying I need to deliver the Version 2 UI and all integration by Friday.

I told him "I already told you that our project is delaying so you need to assign other resources on changes for other projects and let me finish the UI for version 2 for t that project. "

On this he got furious and asked me to do it no matter what by the Friday.

I don't know what should I do?

FUUUUUCCCKKKK!!! I WASTED 2 WEEKS ON A PROJECT BECAUSE I COULDN'T GET THE RIGHT SPECS UNTIL THIS MORNING.......

I SPENT THE LAST 2 WEEKS BUILDING AND TRYING TO GET THINGS TO WORK THAT I DON'T NEED....

My ex-colleague from Sony wrote to me to consult about SLAM system for his side project. Bro...I'm reading papers for like 2 weeks and in no position to advise anyone 😂

After 2 weeks of ranting I have honestly ran out of rants.
Either my life as a dev is too good or I'm clearly not coding enough.
The later seems more plausible.

Got back at work after 2 weeks off

Useless to say I did not remember what to do or where to start…

Today I was working on a feature and while thinking about code organization I found an empty function ready to be filled with the exact name I was about to type.

My 2 weeks ago self prepared it for me… it was so kind of him

How long is your operation system running?

Linux - since the first kernel release I've ever touched.
Windows - depends on the update cycle, mostly 2 weeks up to 6 month.

And there goes another night with reconfiguring my windows session 🤬.

Wow.... FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!

I just destroyed my raspberry. Miscalculated the resistor I need and RiP. Took 2 seconds and BOOOOM. Nothing is working anymore :( 2 weeks of wasted free time. Guess I'll have to buy a new one. Want to finish my project so hard

Codes for 2 weeks
Naw this is a bad idea. Let's revert
While reverting gets distracted by another idea
The other idea also sucks. Let's revert and also finish reverting the first idea pls 😒

I just finished ny first feature at my first dev job - a gallery page connected to an api.

It took 2 weeks. About 2 days of programming, but 12 days of fucking css.

Why is css so bloody hard?

Worked 2 weeks on hunting a memory leak on a product.

Ended up writing object tracker to find the leak(ironically it was in garbage collector). Found the leak and fixed it. It sounds cool but what I pushed was 9 lines commented out 1 line added for 2 weeks work..

Doesn’t feel very fulfilling to work for 2 weeks to comment out few lines. Only silver lining is that I might turn my object tracker into a library for colleagues to use.

P.s: not a linux or windows environment so tools like walgrind aren’t available.

Every time we have finished a project and deployed it the first time at least half of the components are outdated already 😒 Even if we worked only 2 weeks on something.

I hate Murphy's law!

That feeling when you're almost done with your personal project using an entirely new language and framework :)) been working on it for the last 2 weeks. 62 commits in!!

Its funny cuz its true.

Original deadline 2 weeks ago
New Deadline 2 weeks form now
API been down for 2 days and counting

~3 months worth of work left to do, if we lucky, to meet requirements for deadline…

When you have just spent 2 weeks to build an old workspace, you change the version of technical dependency to start the migration...

We've had a project we knew was going to happen since February, and every 2-3 weeks we have been requesting feature requirements and gear to work on (hardware for test automation).

1 month ago we got the official request. 2 weeks ago sales said no to ordering equipment. Sales is now asking for weekly progress updates.

My boss said we have documentation of our asking and the group director (bosses' boss) is behind us saying, "work to make it function, not to get it done quickly."

Sometimes things work out.

when you remember there was an app contest you were gonna enter, quickly write an app in the last 2 weeks, and win

Reminiscing my first tech sticker, this one's from my first hack-a-thon. :') gonna go to the same one in 2 weeks, kinda nervous because I didn't really learn much compared to last year. (but I shamelessly collect the stickers)

Code I wrote 2 weeks ago now looks like chinese to me.

When nginx decides to just NOT answer to any IPv4 requests, áfter 2 weeks of having it set up for IPv6, just because I updated the Let's Encrypt certificate..

self::facepalm();

Well after working on this project for about 2-3 weeks guess what I deleted my source code😢😢😢
Im the opposite of motivated

I like how this one gets you out of 2 weeks of making up topics. Well played @dfox @trogus 👍

My best mentor was at my first job at IBM. The senior dev took 2 weeks to pair program with me and get me up to speed on all the applications, tips and tricks, and the different legacy codebases. I learned more in those 2 weeks than my entire 4 years at college lol.

Just annihilated my first blocking bug of 2018 (that drove me crazy for 2 weeks) on a Drupal environment, this years starts really well 💪😁

How long did it take to receive an offer from a big tech company after your final interview? I’m just so antsy with waiting.. Any one have experiences past 2 weeks? Or even next day?

“Oh I don’t have access to the repo and I’ve been on leave for 2 weeks, I’ll just pair* with you all day over VC”

*pair = question all your variable names

Accidentally ran

$ git reset --hard

On my 2 weeks worth of uncommited code.
Thankfully Intellij has a local history. 😥

For 2 weeks I was scheduled to work on a project. After tirelessly asking the useless PM for a list of tasks I should work on I gave up and worked on another project.

Fast forward 2 weeks and now that the PM wants me to fill in a form they are more than capable of completing (API request) I am getting endless 'kind reminder' emails. How can someone be such a cunt!

Venting my frustration about this incompetent idiot here is likely stopping me saying something I would otherwise be fired for.

Ahhhh 2 more days of work and then I am of to the south of France for 2 weeks of R&R ... It will be 2 looooong days

So I've been back to work for 2 weeks after going on a holiday. Getting back into the flow of things was easy, but seeing the status of the project that I am a part of, and seeing the kind of implementation work that my co-workers has done, it's kind of a no surprise.

So the past 2 weeks I've been completing features that I left my co-workers to finish, but didn't. And rewriting other features that they worked on, but does not meet the specifications.

Will I ever be able to work with reliable/competent developers?

Spent 2 weeks writing code in different services
Today D-Day for integrating all of it. And guess what, Friday evening and it's not working.

I setup a Firebase project, and then remove the authentication completely, so I can send API call freely.

After 2 weeks I am still alive...

That's amazing!

That moment when your gamedesigner manages to make the game completely unplayable with just 2 weeks of bad ideas.
I already gave up on this project, just want to finish it and never look at it again.

Not commenting my code just to return 2 weeks later to wonder what kind of special asshole wrote the code. And what the heck it does.

Currently sat waiting to go into a 11am meeting where I will be told something is wrong even though I've completed a workload of 2 weeks in 3 days. If any PMs are on here, no appreciation sucks.

I asked for 2 weeks of coding whereas I should have asked for 4 weeks just for coding.

What the fuck was the even thinking? Fuck

It's been 3 busy weeks. Had so much to rant about, but I could lurk at best.

We had 2 big features coming to 2 different projects. I told my boss it's take 3 weeks for the one I was working on. The guy working on the other one, said he only needed 1 for his. Guess who got labeled as negative, worrying too much over nothing, and so forth? Especially since a "much more complex" feature would take just 1 week!

Whatever. Fast forward to this week. I was done by tuesday, including testing of both features and deployment. By wednesday, I had even a good looking documentation. Everything was ready. EXCEPT. The 2 features have to go live together, due to various reasons. Guess who ia still a ling way from completing his task? Gueas who asked to postpone his deadline by 2 weeks? Guess who's gonna have to work on weekends for no extra pay?

Guess what? I know how to give an eatimate, and I rather be "negative" and schedule 1 or 2 extra days to be prepared for hiccups and what not rather than having to waste my free time for nothing.

FFS.

I have 10 days off remaining for this year... Basically 2 effective weeks...

What should I do:
A) 2 week holiday
B) 2 x single week
C) carryover to 2021 for maybe real holiday
D) a day for each week

Choose wisely 😆 It's my effin holiday 🤦‍♂️

2 weeks to transfer a system we'd spent 2 years developing to a team with different stack experience who are based in a different office.

We're counting the days until the service is dropped.

Like the last 100 weeks:
1. Be a better person
2. Learn something new every day if you can.
3. Get older :(

What do you do when you don't have any assigned work in office and idle for 2 weeks..?
I'm already frustrated. And I don't know to pretend I'm working infront of manager 😁

Due to Covid-19 my university got closed for 2 weeks, and at work we have to work remotely until further notice.

It's been almost 2 weeks without touching a bit of code;

Am I sick?

I gave my team 2 weeks notice last week. Now, every time something “stupid” happens, this is how I feel! I’ll be starting at my new job in a few weeks and couldn’t be more excited!

I would be fine with not having this meeting if it hand been on the books for 2 weeks. But I didn't want to have it and now I'm the only one here.

Boss: how long would that feature take?
Me: About 2 weeks to implement and test.
Boss: hmm, can it be done it 1 week instead?
Me: .....

Was working on a react native project, paused work two weeks ago, now back to work on the same project, BUT:

1. it no longer compiles
2. Gradle throws shitload of errors

WHY!?

Treehouse shows me in my weekly "questions to answer" newsletter my unanswered 2 weeks old question. 😞☹️😫

Holy fucking shit.
Can people not break my shit mid deploy once, fucking once is all I am asking. 2 weeks of this shit.

When you cant get project documention because people have other things to do and your project has a deadline in 2 weeks

Rant to myself: Don't try to be too smart, you dipshit!

3 weeks ago I packed 2 small changes in one commit, because I was sure (and obviuosly lazy) that no one will ever need these special changes separate.

Guess what happened today? Right, I had to make a change on an old version and needed the one half of this commit.
Cherry-picking ended up in changes I don't need and furthermore some nice collisions.

Thank you very much, past me, for saving 2 minutes 3 weeks ago, which now wastes half an hour.

returning from 2 weeks of PTO, the haiku

what was I doing?
*Looks through tickets in jira*
gives up. plays halo.

I have never thought that eventually I'll swap from Twitter to another feed-based app. It's already 2 weeks I forgot about Twitter. #devRant <3

“2 weeks? I can do it in 1 day”
Just go ahead and do it yourself!
#FuTFuY

!dev
After 2 weeks of continuous efforts, I surrender

When every night is a launch night... So tired.
Been trying to launch this Magento 2 application for about 3 weeks now. It's going to be the death of me.

Boss: Great work on remediation, we have been working on this since for over 2 weeks but I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Me: might be a train, coming our way!

I've recently done 2 interviews in the past 2 weeks, I did 3 stages for the first one and failed the last stage. I felt devastated. I did the 2nd one Which had written and oral, I feel like I failed oral,results are yet to come out. I have 2 interviews next week and I have no energy to prepare. I feel lost and tired of preparation.

I can't change my choice of beer this week because the company is stocked for another 2 weeks.
Damn! I love my job.
I'm just a dev.

What do you think how much time will it take to crack Creative Cloud 2019?
I bet 2 weeks from now.

Mondayband I've basically spent all morning "yelling" at people to get their shit done for things I've been asking for since 2 weeks ago...

I'm just glad that someone helped me do front end in an unrealistic deadline given to us in 2 weeks to finish a corporate-scope project .(2 of us working on)

Now that we realize that he made was another issue that leads to technical debt.

I will do all the refactoring and assure that it works perfectly fine.