It hurts my brain when people use him as an example of successful drop outs.

For starters, this dude's a literal fucking genius. The average person that considers dropping out is far away from the level of intelligence that Bill had when he dropped out.

average_person != bill_gates

Every user of any app: "damn these annoying ads. I hate ads!"
Average devRant user: "Dfox, add ads please so we can support you more."

What a wonderful community (except those who repost memes). ❤️

What if God is actually an average developer working for a company which creates worlds and at first it all ran fine but then the support period expired and wasn't renewed and now shit's hitting the fan and nobody gives a fuck.

Imagine what a coder Gordon Ramsay might be like:

Your alghoritm is so FUCKING slow, I'd rather to try to brute force a 20 characters long alphanumeric password!

This app is more insecure than an average teenager!

If your code was a spaghetti it would be a fucking health hazard!

In my company we developped a tool where we enter the average salary of all members of the meeting and then let a timer run which would show how much money the company spent on that specific meeting.
Needless to say that meetings were way shorter after that

The average commit..

An average day:

1. Start working on feature
2. Finish feature
3. Feature doesn't work
4. Spend 7 hours refactoring and fixing imaginary bugs
5. Add the 3 characters that were missing
6. Laugh and cry, laugh and cry...

Average Joe: creates a chatting group in WhatsApp

Dev: creates a own chatting app

Client called and a colleague picked up. Within 10 minutes his face went from happy to nearly eating himself in order to remain calm (veeery above average dumb/stupid person)

It was insanely entertaining to watch how he tried to keep himself together!

Yes, I've got sadistic tendencies sometimes 😊

Average devranter walking into the office:

This is the equivalent of fining an average person $5, if even that much. What a joke of a fine.

If you're going to fine someone, actually fine them for an amount that'll hurt a little bit.

User Ip Address is too long (maximum is 30 characters).

Okay, dear third-party API, I guess users with IPv6 don't deserve the service... And wtf is 30-char limit for an IP address, when IPv4 can be only 15 characters long, and IPv6 can be up to 39 characters? Did you calculate a weighted average of IP length to get that number?

->Be me
-> Learns computer science
-> Be like above average in class
->"Let's take this to the next level"
->Joins hacker rank
->does the beginners problems.
->hmm that was easy af
->Checks the "easy" problems
->Go to a corner & cry. ;__;

Alright, with all the horrible internet freedom and privacy threatening stuff going around I'm setting up a new tor relay, hopefully 2gb/s.

Already have one running with an average throughput of 2TB/day but another one won't hurt, would it?

Who else runs tor nodes here? :D

I was mediocre in school, you could say my average grade was C++.

Recruiter: I see you got a good degree, however, what were your high school results (A-levels)?

Me: why would you need them?
(they were average, but I tell the recruiter)

Recruiter: Oh, so you were pretty lucky to get a good degree.

Me: No... I worked really hard for it.

Recruiter: Anyway, my client only deals with people who got high grades in high school.

What the fuckkkkkkk?

#stopthismadness

Went for a raise. Got more than I wanted (but negotiated so boss thinks he got himself a deal). Fells good 😀
On the other side, with that I just reached lower end of average developer's wage in Poland...

I see lots of rants about lack of sleep, working through the night etc!

People you need to sleep an average of 7 hours a night your body needs this to stop ill health. Working through the night/mega long hours for nearly two years nearly caused me to have a breakdown.

Please be healthy! Working Long hours doesn't make you cool or a more valued employee.

FYI, you get paid an average of 100k/year working for a business as a dev in switzerland. In india, you'll be looking at an average salary of 5-7k.

Which is less than what you earn in a month in switzerland.

We are so spoiled.

8 hours a day too much for you??!!

My first company has "9.5 planned hours" daily

If the average is found less than the PLANNED HOURS / WEEK, the salary is DEDUCTED accordingly.

Apparently thousands of our users are still using IE 6. While average users spend ~12 minutes on our site, they spend ~20 minutes.

Average linux developer: writes completely fast, optimized code that compiles the first time all via the terminal. He doesn't care.

Also average linux developer: decides to call it Winblows instead of Windows in an attempt to get more people to use linux. He feels like a genius.

I don’t think I will ever be able to get used to this style of arrow-keys.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm truly a good programmer, or if I can just google things better than the average bear.

Found this sweet floppy at my parents place yesterday.
I dont even know if 1.44MB was alot, average or a little back then.

People ask me why I don't use Windows 10 anymore.

This.*

*(Yes I can opt out of all that but how many average users do a fresh install of Windows?)

Clearly, my average commits/per day define my dedication towards work.

Hi!
I developed a little script in Ruby to collect some analytics from the rants posted in the last 24 hours!
In the last 24 hours there were...
-193 Rants posted
-Total words in those rants: 8693

This gives us an average of 45, 01 words per rant.

It's when your teacher gives you an 8 out of 8 grade for literally one printf and one scanf program that you realize the average level of your class is ridiculously low.

My average work day:

Thinking of better ways to plan/organise my work - 75%
Planning my work - 15%
Rethinking how to plan my work - 9%
Actual work 1%

devRant stats - A website with stats and Infos about devRant, for example most used word, how often the word 'fuck' has been used in rants posted today, what the average avatar looks like and other things that you can get using the devRant api

Devrant::Mathematicians, unite!

I found a new way to calculate running average.

Old:
a(o, n, i) = (o(i - 1) + n) / i

New:
a(o, n, i) = o + (n - o) / i

a: New average function
o: Old average
n: Element to add to average
i: New number of elements

beginner coder: figures out how to write a feature

average coder: knows a few different ways to write a feature. but not quite sure on which one to use.

master coder: meditates before starting a project. closes his eyes to map out the entire infrastructure of the project.

god coder: gets paid ALOT of money to guide people on the right to do it.

What is the average air speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Sometimes I love this industry.

Everyone in family and friends allways ask me "You're a programmer and know a lot about computer, so why you're not in Facebook/Twitter/Instagram?"

My answer: We create these services for you (average people) we don't use them ourselves. It's a security hole to put your information in public.

Holy fucking shit!
Look, I know I'm kinda average, I actually think I'm kinda stupid... But holy fuck this new mother fucker at work is in a fucking new level of dumb ... OMG!

I'm actually thinking about asking my boss to let him go and this guy isn't even there for 2 weeks yet.

I tried to convince my boss that using 3d rendering to display information on webpage is unnecessary luxury.

The web browser would hang if the user is using an average pc and there is too much data to render.

This product is aimed for average joe, but he argues that computers in foreign countries are high end devices ONLY.

Such a bullshit.

I asked what if someone with low spec laptop tries to view the webpage.

He said, we will set a min spec requirements for using the website.

Are you fucking kidding me?! RAM and Graphics requirements for a webpage?!

My instinct says that the thing I'm working on would probably end up as waste of time.

But I'd probably learn cool tricks of threejs.

Stop teaching assembly first. It may be the underlying language, but your average coder never needs this confusing mess.

i got high praise for my work today, and i can't understand why 😂
i consider my work average at best, but my boss told me everyone sings my praises behind my back. i wonder how dire things must be that this is considered excellent

An unfriendly reminder: if you don’t know how to use a fucking search engine to at least try and find solutions to your problems, get your sorry ass the fuck out of here!

I reiterate: if you can’t utilise a search engine any better than the average gorilla, you’re an asswipe with no fucking right to even consider getting within miles of devs, you fucktard!

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”

― George Carlin

"There were a lot of complaints about missing grades" well, yes. That's what happens when you make me grade all 60 submissions every week while I work 10-12 hours a day at my other job, on average.

Fun fact: on average it's just as fast to type in your search query into Google as it is to get the bloody fucking assistant to understand what you're saying, especially when it includes words that aren't used very often. Makes one wonder why we've developed these things in the first place... 🙄

Fucking finally. I got a job... No one is probably gonna give a shit because it's your average governmental drone position but I wanted this for a very long time...

** drum roll **

Customs and immigration officer!!!

Thats right! Deported! Deported! Deported! *hot chick* welcome to our country!

Best thing is... Now every project can be a side project... I can chillax and build software in my spare time... I love it.

The average functional programmer

Explaining technical things to average user for us

X: What do you wanna earn?

Me: Well the average is $$$.

X: Okay. We will pay you $.

Me: ... okay.... .... ... ... -_-''

!dev

Just went to the pet asylum to look for a cat. There was a shy black one (eh, maybe not a good first but Moar Blacker, Moar Better 😋) and a black and white one which was very open towards me.

Probably I'll get the latter, and build some food, water and litter dispenser systems for it with motors and my esp8266 boards 🙂

The lady who was volunteering there and showed me around had an interesting story though.

Apparently both of those aforementioned cats were wild cats (so they don't come from a proper household or anything). Except that black and white one which apparently came from some rather retarded people.. think average Facebook user.

According to her those previous owners came there with 2 cats including the black and white one as "extremely wild, we found them in the forest, put them in cages (because everyone carries cat cages in their car every day, right?) and brought them here". Nice excuse for average Facebook user level of retard I have to say 😜 but it's not very waterproof, you know?

But on average the people that they get there are even worse than that.. some get a great initial meeting with a cat, but then leave them there because they don't like the stripes on a paw or something stupid like that. As she put it: "you're not fitting pants in a clothing shop, are you?! 😑"
Had to try hard to not burst out in laughter from that description 😂

Point is, the average customers there are awful.. apparently she was very grateful to have a rather down-to-earth customer like me and my home supervisor (who helpfully drove me there 🙂) for once. So terrible clients.. they're everywhere!

It really taught me to be mindful of the hardships of people in any profession who deal with clients.

By not having them. Seriously, every job I had was more than average paying and I was overqualified for the tasks. Sure I didn’t develop oh-so-important software but I never had to do overtime, lose sleep because of workplace difficulties.

Pick your fights well. This profession is unfair. No need to endanger yourself for idealism.

Mate - whatcha doing ...
Me - oh just hacking nasa
Mate - seriously!? 😯😨
Me - OOOOh yeah I do it all the time see (shows similar photo)
Mate - don't hack me 😭
Me (in head) - you poor dumb fuck...
Me irl - I won't if you don't piss me off 😏

Average Joe:
1.searches how to save money for child college education.
2. Creates a bank account and starts to save , small amount of money from his income.
3. After 18 years, after all the hardwork finally pays the tuition fees to his child.

Dev:
1. Creates a website"Child Savings 101"
2. Monetize it
3. After 18 years, pays the tuition fees.

I can type blind since elementary school with above average accuracy...

Yet i will never be able to write "width" without writing "widht" 2 times first

I asked my boss for a raise. Since we're data scientists, I basically plotted a column chart showing that he was paying me half of the european average. I said I was willing to negotiate but he was very 'discomfortable'.

Time to go find another job. Or second one 😭

It doesn't feel good to be average at everything.

Life is depressing

I can't commit to anything hard enough to become the best.

Programming
Singing
Drawing
Story making
Sports

I'm just average.
I feel bad
I feel like I'm a waste of resources.

I'm tired of ranting.
This life is just tiring.
I don't have the patience

I'm average at commitments.
Time management

I see other people code and sing better than me and feel demotivated

I feel like jumping of a cliff cause no matter what I do, there's someone light years ahead of me.

I'm not even unique
Ultimately that's probably what I want.
To be irreplaceable.

I guess in this struggle to be relevant I'm gonna lose myself and if I do get there, I might not be as happy anyways.

So what's the point to all this

Simple and accurate!
UI/UX makes a huge difference to average users. Just because you're the developer/expert user, do not think what's obvious to you is obvious to everyone. Think about being in a bubble. This is why you need collaboration with people in a different scope. Or atleast gather feedback from users.

Software engineering is becoming main stream.

It will become the average job in the future. Anyone who cant dev is going to be poor and do the dirtiest jobs.

Dev average income is going to drop， mainly because a shit loads of frameworks and dumbification of software and code creation will be set in place to accomodate large population as devs.

The will create a seperation between the normal idiot dev who will be paid minimum wage and the smart ones that create the frameworks and dumbed down code creating tools.

Its oversimplified obviously because im not taking into account sys admin and so on but in general it will follow that trend. Its like this today but because there isnt enough devs， idiots are still revered and payed big bucks.

Give it 50 to 75 years imo.

When your daily average user numbers are just a little too good to be true.

Wtf? Who parties in the middle of the week?
My Alcoludo game has been installed on 96 devices yesterday, when normally average daily installations are between 1 to 10. Not that I'm complaining 😅

The best estimations are the team based estimations. Do a planning poker, but don't agree on the average or median, just sum up all the estimations! 😉

For me, the bad part of being a dev? it is the pay.

I know many folks here says the pay is good. But in Maldives, The pay for devs are so so so damn damn terrible. Even freelance.

Average pay per month for devs : ~700 usd

:(

VoIP meeting today lasted 7 minutes.
I have kept the board down to ~5 ticket average for the last 3 months.

Co-worker(jokingly): I guess we don't need you anymore.
CEO: Quite the contrary. @chenb0x may need a promotion.
Me: *smirks*

This is why I like working for this company. Love the culture....no matter how much I may bitch about the clients.

'How did I get here?' a young dev may ask.

1. Delegate where proper
2. Script whatever can be scripted
3. When the board is low in tickets, it becomes a recursive responsibility to keep it low.

Back story
-----------------
When I was hired, the VoIP board was sitting at a ~30-40 ticket average.

It's my first birthday!!!!

~$ uptime
11:06:55 up 365 days, 3:02, 86 users, load average: 1,20, 1,33, 1,22

Happy birthday to you, lappyyyyyyy......
Happy birthday toooooooo yyooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

I was just an average student in school, but my senior from DSC, changed my life and the developer now I am is because of DSC. DSC is powered by Google Developer and now I'm a lead of my college.

My non-tech friend was looking into a degrees guidelines for N.C. State University and they recommend C++... she thought C++ was the grade she needed to average to get that degree. 😂

Homies with the "there is no cloud" merch acting like they're straight up Morpheus-ing average people's existences.

Do any of you know anything about devbuddies.io? Are they nice or just the average recruiter?

Typical arch linux user runs 'sudo pacman -Syu' on average three times a day!

This is far above American average!

Just checked my laptop uptime and it's been on one charge for exactly 1 month, with average use and aggressive tlp/powertop settings 😰

I don't want to go back homw...
(P.S. - This is India, and average internet connection is about 1/100th of this speed)

Just your average android studio and an android emulator on 4GB of RAM :D

I'm hal laughting, half facepaling.

Use multiple servers they said
It's gonna balance automaticlly your load they said.

Well, they didn';t accoubnt for a MEGA badly writen API whic can block a whole server for a minute.

Or, but it's not the end !!!

So you see ? 1 at 100%, 1 at 0% ? Quick maths : Average 50%.

Autoscaling kicks in at average 40% for 2 minutes.

So it kicks in... Created a 3d server... Which is still booting !!

And some trafic redirected there.

Sooo. Users on a 100% server : Bad bad bad for them
Users on 0% server : No problems
users on a new 3d server : Wait 15 seconds, then it's like 0%.

Fun fun fun. At least I know now which fucking API does that.

​I'm a junior dev in a scrum team with two senior devs: one actual senior and one average dev that's just been around for a long time. At stand up meeting, that average senior lists helping me as one of his task Every Single Day. 9 out of 10 times when I ask him a question we end up asking the senior senior together.

Put a counter based on the number and average salaries of the attendants on screen. The meeting won't be more productive but the management will see how much money they are wasting with all the unnecessary meetings.

Being paid as a 'junior software developer' at the average salary for that with all these responsibilities

That's a funny joke

Just saw a breaking news scrolling on TV about Instagram, WhatsApp and Facebook being down 😂

I find it hilarious - it shows how dependent an average joe have become on these services.

Really loving Processing and HYPE.

Created this Image after a day's work. Here is 10x10 pixel block is an image of Mohanlal (An awesome actor from kerala).

I took the average color of each block and then matched it with the most dominant color of the sample images. And then drew the sample image onto that box.

Thanks Daniel Shiffman for the inspiration.

Was at a party the other day and was talking to some randoms and they asked me about programming and said it must be fun and fast paced to do it on your own...

All I did was smile and told them I have spent 10 days trying to decide on 16 colour codes for a part of the software the average consumer will never even see...

Game development everybody!

That feel when my solution runs way faster than world average

PS: the puzzle is SAWAYAMA WONDERDISC

Excuse me driversed.com? THATS NOT HOW MATH WORKS!

I've only taken one test and got a 93%, but it says my average score is a 92%.

Just thought that was kinda funny.

what do you usually charge for an average website? 🙂

load average: 348.58, 293.64, 179.93

Um, wat?
1) What are you doing little server?!
2) How could you possibly find the time to tell me that?!

Was accused of plagiarism because I could write a bubble sort algorithm without a reference (and therefore without a source) in my SECOND year of courses.

Their low expectations bit them in the ass when the admin. made all undergrads take a basic test (for loop going through an array, average of values, etc) and lots of people in their third year failed.

I hate my freelancer life.
1. No weekends
2. No particular time to close
3. Work for 12 to 14 hours without sleep sometimes
4. Keep explaining the dumb clients about how development is not wordpress.

Its all fucked up. I have no life.

My average Lines of code this month is around 700 LOC/day. Whereas the average that showed on internet is 100 LOC/day.

I have choosen a hellish life.

I live in a small town and work remotely. When I tell people, (even young ones) I'm a programmer/web developer they think I install programs or make simple sites. I try to explain to them that I make the things but it perplexes them. Maybe because they think all apps are made by hi tech wizards and not average joes like myself working for average companies. Any of you other countryfolk have similar experiences?

Well, not necessary my favourite but the first one I learned.

I think the weird syntax and semantics combined with the ridiculous average length of variable names is a major flaw in this one.

As a web designer/developer I hate this recent trend of very light gray text fields on forms that have a white background. I don't want to have to peer at my screen for objects. My vision is average, so why would a client want this?

My Lenovo feels average today

Hi, what is the average salary of developers in your country.

For me : i'm junior UI/UX designer and front end developer in Paris, working for Parisian digital consulting agency 35hrs a week

Annual salary 30k €
Adding to this :
Daily meal ticket 8,8€
Insurance
50% of transport ticket's price is refunded
And many other stuffs and don't even remember.

Knowing that Paris is an expensive city.

How about you people ?

Rant???

Another recrutment process...

I got an IQ test to even be allowed to have a tech interview in a foreign language. After doing it, the recuruiter went back saying that my results are average and there where candidates with higher score...

Now should I be offended or happy that I'm an averagely inteligent developer?

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people

Found this today! For someone like me who has 30+ tabs open on an average, this is an absolute gem!

Nice try, 'influencer'

Now raiding your average trending social community?

Well FUCK OFF!

developing add-ons for Casio calculators is definitely the best experience. No syntax or error highlighting. Average failed builds between successful builds: 12 🤔
I won't mention the default font for the code editors in there is Arial...

I hate when people ask you to find their deleted files. Fucking people! It is like asking an architech to recover something from their trash bin. People are idiots that don't want to learn. Some people think that they know a lot of computing and barely can power on they monitors. At this level of average stupidity, people should get licenses to use computers.

The ratio of my ranting to +1 is well below average.

Trying to figure out the average age of devRant users.. So..

if(user['age']<6){
$score--;
else $score++;

Started a new job last week. Pays a tad below average for position, but i get training time and budget for anything i want.
So far i have had few days of company introduction, and now a week for training courses related to position.
I have not seen any code yet, brought no value in, just joined.
Massive green flag to me.

whats the average age on devrant?

So I recently found out that just about every other company in this town pays their devs with equivalent experience at least 25% more than what my current employer does.

I requested a salary meeting and informed my boss that I'm way below the average for my position, he replied "Yeah, your salary has been below average for years now, yet you are my best employee in this area".

It hurts that he very well knew this fact and still decided not do to anything about it before I brought it up.

I told him that I don't feel rewarded for all my hard work and overtime, so I requested a 25% bump or I'm leaving in January.

Realizing you are just an average in this world is suck

I noticed I adopted a method when people just can't answer something simple like "well how long is it going to last?" and then getting an answer like "I don't know", which to I reply "Well, what's the average it lasts?" and they suddenly remember it again, fucking knobs

Finally! I'll be able to send dick pics with depth! Thank you iPhone X!

ME: *runs a load test for the umpteenth time*

RDS DB: *is slow af: HI contentions*

ME: "dear AWS support, I see the RDS has troubles writing to disk as THIS db exhibits 10x higher W latencies than THAT OTHER db we have. Both are identical, apps are identical."

AWS: "Hello, I hope you have a good day. After the investigation that took us almost 2 weeks, we can confirm that there are 10x higher IO latencies to disks: [CloudWatch link]. We also see a high load average during your tests.

We recommend investigating the high load average and tuning your queries along with the database.

I hope this helps, good day."

ME: *are you seriously calling this PREMIUM support package....?*

I have a more than average paying job. Cool manager who is okay with almost anything I do .The work place and colleagues are awesome but I'm not getting any work. My title says SE but all I do at work is play. Should I leave this place or stay and work on my side projects?

Someone please create a tinder for average people. I don't want to be forever alone.

We really take for granted just how much ergonomics goes into the average user interface that has matured.

Like knowing that when I doubleclick a keyword, I don't want the comma as well to be selected.

Or that when I use a command in the terminal and I press tab I want a list of a specific element type.

Everything has gotten so much better since the 90s !

First experience with Android: our professor of Software Engineering gave us a project about building an app for University indoor geolocation using BLE beacons.
Just found out that only a few PhD-level dudes did such a thing with much fewer good results.
Sounds like when your average-hedidnotrealizedwhataprogrammeris-friend asks you if you are able to hack Google Chrome.

Good Job Google! :D

Going to restart my pc after 8.75 days of average load of 1.96....

Yayyyyy

I sometimes like to believe I'm of at least average intelligence, being able to write software and all...
Then my lawnmower breaks and I spend a whole day trying to replace a head gasket...

Looks like my users are enjoying themselves. Bringing my poor dedicated server to a load average of 72/8 at full CPU usage.

If only I wasn't just running an open source project by myself with only crowd-source money to rely on for server costs :v

I will never work in an open floor plan environment again.

The average salary is 6 figures and they can't even spring for sound deadening material on the concrete walls, nevermind cubicles.

Nothing says "I don't value your contribution to our product" quite like treating your engineers like cattle.

Why I try to ALWAYS use semicolons in JS:

In short, weird shit happens sometimes

An example:

So I'm doing a small project for freeCodeCamp, working with the Twitch API. I decided to make an array on the fly to append a few elements to a documentFrag in order after setting all my props. Forgot a semicolon. Apparently, Babel transpiles this:

info.innerHTML = (``)
[span, caret, info].forEach(elm => frag.appendChild(elm));

to this if you omit the semicolon:
info.innerHTML = ' '[(span, caret, info)]

this is why you should avoid relying on ASI, you're going to have to remember them in other languages out there, so for your own sanity, might as well get used to them. Just thought I'd share--who knows, might help a JS newb out there somewhere.

I love what’s going going on with GameStop...

Once again we are witnessing the power of the internet bringing average people together and give them power to change the “untouchable” system..

So I've got the highest average grade in computer in my level. Yet just because I haven't represented the school, I couldn't receive the "Best in Computer" award

Can I get a job without a degree? I'm so sick of studying like this in India. Argh. I already know a lot more than the average computer science students and I'm wasting my time trying to learn why friction opposed the tendency of slipping. Idiots.

I wonder what the average lifespan is of a developer.
Is it higher or lower then the average life expectancy?
Does it have to do with our mindset? Or are our clients so terrible that we have more stress? If so does devRant lower our stress?

Then I don't want you. (Just my opinion.)

Company i work for just posted updated pay rates.
It's good. They went from lower end of spectrum to a little above the average in terms of pay, and benefits stay the same - solid.

Is front-end developer (web developer) a well payed job?
I mean, how much is the average?
And it's a demanded job?

Meanwhile the average salary for a teacher in Puerto Rico is 26k-31k

I currently have my dream job as a web developer, with a little above average salary, good colleagues and an understanding boss.

Today I had a recruiter contact me with a job opportunity (Senior developer) that would easily net me 1.5 times more salary, and a lot of other advantages.

It almost hurts to say no.

I live in a poor country (Cambodia). I am still in college but I want to use my current web development knowledge to help the poor. Everyone in my country seems to be interested in creating anything that earns a lot of money. I just want to create a website that is useful for average and below average citizen. Any idea for the website? maybe something small but useful

I';m officialy spending 30$ / day on cigarettes.

And average of 20$/day on beer.

Where do people find motivation to stop these things lol ?!

A lot of money here xD

Make sure they're implementing basic technology that you deem necessary, or at least that they'd allow you to set it up. If they're working without CI/CD, for example, there are probably more problems.

Also, note that you might also be quite under qualified in comparison to the average employee. That might also affect you in a bad way.

the average sperm cell contains 37.5 mb of data

How many hours of actual productive work do you devs average a day? Honestly, I think I average about 2 hours of honest, good work in my 8 hour day. Between random meaningless meetings that could be emailed out or just daily distractions (coworkers chatting, my phone, etc). Am I alone in this?

Found out today that someone has a cron job running doing a daily DB export since June 1 of 2015. The dumps average 2GB. I am amazed that storage engineering hasn't complained. Here's the kicker. It's a Dev database. WTF!? Dev? I freed up a terabyte of space today. Now I need to find out who owns that cron job.

TFW your boss likes you enough to set up a full-time offer for you. 😗

TFW the offer is $20K below the average salary. 😬

A remarkably stupid but efficient technique I invented today to measure the latency of an audio feedback channel involving multiple hardware elements that is difficult to synchronize by itself:

1. Knock. Observe the echo in the feedback.
2.Try to knock in such a way that the physical sound more-or-less lines up with the feedback. The human brain is really good at this on average.
3. Once you often only hear one knock (as perfect synchronization as your ear can tell), record several minutes of audio
4. Stop knocking, count the additional knocks in the echo
5. Multiply the average delay between knocks on the recording by the number of additional knocks from step 4

Unlike rest of you average plebs, I am code ninja.(who the fuck prepares these adds).

If I had some reliable metric to measure bullshit per file, let's call it BPF, I believe the number would be highest on average for files named "gulpfile.js"

Creating a popular SaaS while it itself being easily maintainable and generates an average monthly salary 😁

Santa... Please can I haz?

It's asked before here but need to be questioned again because I'm bored.

Would you rather have fucked a sheep while no one knows or that you didn't do it but everyone is sure you did?

The sheep is average looking with okayish BMI. Looks bit German

Let's do a simple research here. What is the average fresh graduate salary as a programmer in your country.
In Hong Kong, it is around 2000USD

which one is better?

sitting on a comfortable chair with foot rest,
having very powerful computer,
having the best IDE's with UI designers,
ML based auto completions,
Free food. but $4000 per month

or

sitting on an average chair without foot rest,
having average computer,
having only notepad or vim*, without UI designers
NO auto completions!
paid food. but $40000 per month

* Vim is actually very nice text editor

I average 2000 emails in my inbox a month. Mostly things telling me they are ok, I now know when to expect emails and worry if the are delayed.

Damn I am becoming so skinny!!!
Like stress, sleep deprivation for months, lack of proper feeding.
I am sacrificing much for being a programmer.
Jeez, I never taught I am gonna be looking like the average "stereotypical skinny programmer".
I don't need a break but need my body back in shape.
Yeah - another narcissistic rant

What is an average/fair entry level salary(US) for a developer?

Average salary for developers these days: 700$/month + 10% of the company once said developer creates the new Facebook.

How do you deal with the learning curve frustration?
So, as a software developers we need to learn things frequently. But when we start, we have a lot of things to cover before we call ourselves average on that subject. Before this stage, there is a lot of frustration, stress, anxiety etc. How do you people handle it?

“Millennials are picking up their phones on average of 237 times per day. The machines have not adapted to the millennials. The millennials have adapted to the machines.”
Started listening to this book. So far so good.

!rant

Any other OnePlus 5T owners here? How's your battery life been? I was a bit unsure at first due to its lower capacity battery (compared to its competitors) but I can easily get 8+ hours SOT. Quite impressed with it.

Was curious if that was the average.

Heyy ranters! I'm starting a junior job in my country and I wanted to know what is your average payroll for a junior position in your country?

I got my evaluation today. First time in a year that i had a talk longer 30 minutes. 1,5 hours was a bit too much maybe. After an hour i just wanted to get over with it.
Verdict: average
Meanwhile i could’ve improved my project...

!rant

Recently I bought a Moto Z2 Play, and it really it's an amazing phone, it includes the battery mod, and given than with my average usage, it lasts for me for day and a half, I'm more than happy :D

uberuser@mail:~# uptime
11:11:21 up 757 days, 19:14, 1 user, load average: 0.42, 0.55, 0.82

In an average day, how many different languages do you use?

For example my previous job was strictly C and Python.

My current job involves Python, C#, VB, PHP, SQL, HTML/CSS, JS. It's rare but quite possibly I could touch all these on a single day.

Average software isn't even average.

I can not count the number of times I am faced with a consumer facing software such as fastfood terminals, atms, phones or even OS's that simply are broken. I am so sick of looking around like there is something wrong with me, when its the fucking code that simply offers me broken options. My favorite is the McDonalds ordering platform that simply offers one option once you select your first item: + THATS it a fucking + sign is my only option. What if I only want one fucking thing!!!

No I have to stumble around, looking ignorant until I finally just press the add more + sign. WHALLA
I can then select complete order - stupid programmers show me we all should write our own code that way we live or die by its quality.

Someone once told me, be glad software is so poorly written on average, otherwise we would all be a slave to big brother by now.

I need to decide about my new job:
+ 20% more salary
+ better job/role
+ 1 or 2 days in the office by average per week
- no more 100% remote

Accept or no? I have been working from home for 3 years

Seriously, what is the point of a 1px border-radius? It's barely discernible from 0. It looks like the button got slightly dented in transit or something.

If you're going to round the corners, at least go 2px so it's noticeable by the average user or not at all. COMMIT! :)

1- hope that Madagascar will be listed in Google Play when I try to register as a developer... 😭
2- upload many applications on Play Store 😍
3- working as an android developer with an average salary of $50,000 per year, not my actual shitty salary of $4,500 per year... 😒
4- Earn the Associate Android Developer Certification 😎 🙌

I've looked at code I've writte and on average I fix one bug (minor) every 10-20 lines.

Is this normal, subpar, or good for a beginner?

The average user is...

I learned you can access developer options on Android by tapping your build number in the information settings, it gives you a little notification and reveals the secrets hidden from the average user. It's neat, I like it, you should see if it helps you in any way If you use Android.

Colleague: The user said this [Total line] is not the average she expected.
Me: Okay? But she knows that averages are weighted?
Colleague: I'm gonna call her.

... 30 minutes fast forward

Colleague: Okay she wants an average, but she wants us to divide it by something else.
Me: Okay? But she knows an average is the sum of one thing divided by the sum of another thing and not just anything?
Colleague: Yeah, she said she wants it to be kinda this in relation to that.
Me: Okay, so rather some percentage value?
Colleague: To be honest, she just wanted to reproduce this old Excel formula.

God has left this planet ... and I admire my colleague for not completely freaking out in the face of the user.

Mr Fucking Robot. What an episode. Mind fucked up in the end. This season starts so average and now it's just getting dope. Brilliant writing.

!tech

At many phases of life, i had 3 choices : the difficult one , the average one and the wrong one.

I questioned the difficult one as it was too pointless to go on with, uncomfortable to follow and stressful to practice. Some guys chose that.

I pulled myself away from the wrong one because my parents always reminded me of the implications. Some guys still chose that

I went on with the average one because it was comfortable and cozy and didn't caused any Unknown chain of reactions. A lot of guys chose that.

The results?
The guys who chose the difficult ones became the pioneers/winners

The guys who chose wrong one became addicts and shame to society

The guys who chose the average one later chose the difficult one and became pioneer/winners

I took the average choice ,and then kept on taking the average choice and is getting the unique designation : "looser"

Must choose the difficult option next time :/

Working night has to be the most relaxing thing, I'm all alone at the office with some good relaxing classical music, nobody to interfere, good coffee and code and the average office ghost, looking out at the street below I can see the city slowly coming to life in the morning. Wish everyday could be like this 😏

Why are the damned Spaniards so small? Because of them I am unable to sit in the newer trains that go around the Netherlands. The angled headrests (they are supposed to kinda wrap around the head). But these headrests start below my shoulders and my head then floats above the headrest. This causes my shoulders to be folded together.

FU you spaniards (no offense to everyone who didn't design trains), if you can't take in consideration what the average length of the users is you have failed as a product designer.

Yes I am tall (1.95m) but not really above average around here (maybe a cm or so)

I was sure my buffer size was average...

Been griping at my boss about this since I took the job.

How much time on average do you spend doing programming related things?

This could be anything involved in the development of a program or maintenance of existing program.

for my job I need to know,

Programming, C#, Optimization, Multithreading and Async code, Working certain tools, Reading difficult written code, Understanding, Physics, Networking, Rendering, Codeloops, Memory management, Profiling tools, Being able to make Jira tickets and read Jira tickets. Understanding source control branching, merging, push and pull. bug fixing.

And I write almost 1 line of code a week on average..

I'm a programmer.

How many hours do you work per day on average during a work week?

From yesterday I started using the proper typing way (Qwerty) instead of using only two index fingers .
Guess what My WPM dropped from 47 to 8(average).
I'm doing it Just to get better at vim and increase my programming efficiency.
I feel a long way to go to fix my bad typing habits.

Is it true that the average IQ of DevRant community is more than that of Twitter, FB, etc?

What is charged for a normal sized/average website. Very hard to say of course since most projects is different.

How am I supposed to work in an environment where the backend crashes and is unavailable for 20 minutes multiple times a day and when it does work the average response time is 3000ms??

On average it takes me 2 months to read a technical book, I'm not sure it's a pace I should be proud of...

On an average, how many times a day does a dev think about offing themselves while working with azure cloud?

Why do average people insist on buying ridiculous packages from companies like GoDaddy - when they don't know a thing about hosting or domains? They may as well just break a few of my fingers before I start their project.

What the fuck is going on ???

How the "intermediate" c# developers can't do a simple null safe average of even numbers in an array ?!

Why they still write loops and shit (without any nul checks ofc) while it can be done in 1 line :

array?.Where(x => x % 2 == 0).DefaultIfEmpty(0).Average() ?? 0

WHY ? Even Junior c# dev is supposed to know that shit

Read an article in a newspaper about the pros and cons of hiring super skilled programmers, that it could be an advantage to have a team consisting of geniuses and average programmers (something like that) .
And I thought for myself, that it suddenly seemed possible for me to get a job in the future 😂

Do average users rather tend to pay at the paywall of ransomware (like wannaCry) if the user interface offers a great experience?

(How far) Do you see a future where one of Linux's distros gets a good enough user experience that average people start using it?

My partner has been using Ubuntu in one of her side-computers and they haven't complained. That said, my partner is pretty technologically literate, although they don't code professionally.

So, What's the average net salary in your country? (After deducting taxes and all)

How long (what % of day) are you fully focused (contentrated) on programming on average per day? How many hours is your work day? The longer the hours, the harder to stay focused we probably can agree. How are you doing in carreer - good or not, can tell as detailed as you might want to share.

Turns out Chrome really dislike to parse, save in indexedDB, query some things, and draw a graph of some JSON file.
Or, you know, maybe, an average response size of 5Mb is a bit too much.

Do you guys think it would make sense to add polls to the rant categories?

Not the first time I've seen questions like "What's the average age of devRanters?" or similar, and polls would make it a whole bunch easier to read/write answers in those cases!

@dfox

P.S. Was this discussed before? If so, my bad!

Another curious question.

How much is your hour worth? In average. Mine is no more than $10/hr and probably $5/hr sometimes.

Whether freelance hours or full time salary. So I will know how low are dev getting in my country. And then probably I can cry myself to sleep. 😁

What's more important to you guys. Getting the chance get knowledge or make money ?
I recently graduated as the second best, making a little less then the average (in Germany) but get all kinds of certifications and courses for free and working on a 90million Dollar Projekt using modern technology (Java)

I'm totally happy with this situation for the start of my professional career what u think

So ive been seing a couple funny unattended PC pranks lests here yours!

my ultimate favourite : when someone walk of without locking his PC i go and switch his mouse to left handed. its hilarious how some ppl take for ever to figure it out.

so funny and constructive, you can gage problems solving on the fly! plus the average i now lock my pc goes up 90%

I am sick of Android cave dwellers go outside everytime iOs released and make their old tired “inNOvatIon” joke.

Apple does not say we brought these things first, so there is no base for a joke even. But when Apple does, you can be sure it will be far more perfect than your average Android phone has, or even top end ones.

That I will always be average at my job.
I will never be good at it. Simply because I am not passionate about it. But then I also don't know what else is there which I like that can pay my bills.

A few questions from a highschool student looking to go into a programming job post-secondary.

Did you go to college, university or jump right into it? Any regrets?

How did you get your first job?

I'm a little paranoid because while I'm great with programming and math (high 90 average) I am horrible with classes that require taking apart stories like English or history.

Running NPM install on an average size project on a free tier Cloud9 instance.

Didn't go too well kept hitting memory limit which killed the NPM process.

Upgrade it is..