Pleb: "What's your job?"
Me: "I'm a programmer."
Pleb: "Great, because I have a problem with my pri..."
Me: "STOP! Last person who thought I was a printer support serf got strangled with the printer cable."
Pleb: "But it's a wireless printer."
Me: "Right, where's the power cord?"

My screens have a different height, but luckily I solved the problem with c++

A rare bug appeared. It was my duty to finish it.

SH = Manager

SH: So when do you think you can finish the task?
Me: I still have to analyze the problem. Give me a moment and I'll get back to you.
SH: Alright.

*An hour later*

SH: *Approaches my desk* Have you found the source of the problem?
Me: Not yet. Please give me some more time.
SH: Ok.

*An hour later*

SH: *the approach* You found it yet?
Me: Yes, I've found the the source of the problem, But... *explains the problem and thus concluding that it's a complicated bug*
SH: Can you finish it by tomorrow?
Me: I'll do the best I can but I am not entirely sure if I can finish it by tomorrow.
SH: OK great!

*The next day*

SH: *Le approach* Hey I have a colleague here that may be able to solve the problem, he has skills with XYZ. Ok, I will leave you two at it then. *the leave*
Helper: So can you tell me about the issue here?
Me: *explains the bug and the source of the problem*
Helper: Have you tried solution A?
Me: Yes sir, but it yields a different output... *explains what happened with solution A*
Helper: Well, that won't work. What about solution B?
Me: I've tried that, too. *Another lengthy explanation*
Helper: Welp, ok. I'll get back to you on that.

(...But he never came.)

*A few hours later*

SH: *A.P.P.R.O.A.C.H.* Hey I have this team lead from another department. I think he can help you out on this one. *L.E.A.V.E.*
Helper 2: What seems to be the problem?
Me: *Explains again with all the solutions I tried but failed*
Helper 2: Wow. That really seems to be a complicated problem.
~~
Me (In my head): -_-
~~
Helper 2: Listen, I need to get back to my team. I'll keep you posted if I happen to find a solution for your problem alright?
Me: Alright thanks.

*Towards the end of the day*

SH: *APPROACHHHH* Have you resolved the bug yet?
~~
Me (In my head): You made me spend half the FUCKING day explaining to these people who didn't even give a piece of FUCKING SHIT to contribute to the problem and you are asking me if I am done with this FUCKING BUG? FUCK YOU, YOU SON OF A -
~~
Me: No, it is not finished yet..
SH: You have to finish this because we don't have tomorrow.
~~
Me (In my head): SHDIFHWISGSIFGSISBAUDBEIQBDIWGFIEBWIDHWIQBDOSBCISBDOSHDIAGSUSVDIFBDKDJWIQKDBDIDGSUWVDIABDIXBSIDBDIDBWUWGUSVDUWVDJQBDUDVWISHDUWVFG
~~

I went home for the day.

Will the bug in my code please stand up?

I repeat

Will the bug in my code please stand up?

I think we have a problem here.

*music intensifies*

Hi sir i have a problem can you please teamview in and help

Me: sure no problem
Login....

Are you there ....
Hello whats the problem

40min later
Sorry i went out for lunch

😤😤😤😤😤

So I was setting up a dating progile after a female friend was pushing for it. She said I wouldnt have a problem finding someone online.
So lets setup the languages

I think I get a programmer high.

Like when I program, I get really into it, time is flying, I'm having fun problem solving, I am super focused, my brain is thinking super fast, and I have a hard time stopping.

Maybe similar to a runners high?

I am a programmer, and if you ask me to fix your pc, I accept the challenge... After all, I can Google a problem and implement a solution like no other, you are right to have come to me.

colleagues: Hey, have you finished that app
Me:

"Some people, when confronted with a problem, think “I know, I’ll use regular expressions.” Now they have two problems." - Jamie Zawinski

One of our clients deploy their own server app. So this happened after a prod deployment. (4am)

*Cellphone rings while sleeping*

Client : we need you on the conference call now. URGENT!

*Gets on conference call*
*Client explain the problem*
*Explaining to the client that the problem is in their side (https connection not working, either network or certificate problem)*
*Client doesn't believe it and pushes me for a fix that I have no control on*
*4 hours later in a heated conversation*

Client : ok problem is on our side. We used our SSL certificate from staging with production and thought it would work.

Me :

Woke up early. Feel great. Even office coffee tastes great. Today is going to be a good day.

Lead QA: - Hey I'm fixing some stuff in production, and now I can't reach it. Do you have the same problem?

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY, GO FIX YOUR OWN PROBLEM CUNT.

COFFEE TASTES FUCKING GREAT.

Hey guys, first rant,

At the moment I'm developing a very big and complex app. We are almost done and decided to deliver a test version to our customer. After he received our test he called us and said there is a problem with a function, he just said it's not working and wasn't very specific.

So I decided to check his problem, because an colleague couldn't figure it out.
I started the app via android studio and had a similar problem, there was a huge delay at the automatic recording function of Bluetooth messages, I thought yeah this is his problem.
I showed it my colleague and he said that he doesn't have this problem, we have different Bluetooth simulators so we thought that there must be a problem with the Bluetooth communication or the simulators are broken.
I checked if there is some kind of timing or buffer problem and logged the shit out of the simulator and found nothing, 3 hours were lost🏁.

My colleague checked his last changes because he had changed a lot at the App Api do to new conditions and those customer wishes💀 he couldn't found anything. So we thought maybe it's my device and the device of the customer. We switched the devices and tada no problem with my devices if the app is builded at the pc of my colleague.

I thought ok maybe it's because I turned some ndk features off. Turned it back on, nothing happened. So we exchanged our Android Studio Settings but no difference. So I said yeah whatever my mashine is just fucked. I restarted my mashine for the third time and started android fucking studio. Some little popup showed up "new updates"... the solution came to my mind ... Do to an update of android studio I excidently turned on Instant Run.....🌋 . I checked it, it was activated, these fucking instant run, great idea but not working... Turned it off, everything worked.
I called the customer because he can't have a problem and he said, this time not angry, oh yeah it was just a notification if I want to turn on my Bluetooth and I decided no and the Bluetooth recording is not recording, this is a problem... -😠NO FUCKING COMMENT😤-

Sales manager: Hi all, we are launching a new internal hackathon. Form up a team with the right expertise to help with address the problem statement and get going!

Me: what’s the problem statement?

Sales manager: you have to sign up first. There’s proprietary company info with our plans for next year involved. You have to agree to terms and conditions before continuing. Legal say so.

Me:

*signs up*,
*fills in docU-sign*,
*clicks through 3 other screens*

Ok let’s see this problem statement.

“What new and magical customer experience can you create and launch to win in our markets”

... that’s not a fucking problem statement ... and why the fuck does that require filling out a docu-sign form to see?

I REALLY fucking hate legal / sales people. Wasting everyone’s time.

Actual email I just sent to a customer:

"I logged into your account and I see the problem. I will update you and have it fixed either by tonight or tomorrow morning. It is a rare bug we have encountered before, and we are working on it as you read this. "

The truth:

"Im fucking drunk right now. I know that error. I put off fixing it for awhile now hoping it wouldn't come up because it's fucking annoying to fix. I'll try to fix it tomorrow morning, k no promises though. If I can't I'll still have your problem taken cats of it just means I'll have to do it manually. Anyway.. Gonna drink some more now, bye. "

P. S. There is no we. It's just me. K bye.

Manager: "Good Morning"

Employee: "Okay"

Manager: "You are fired. I deserve a proper reply"

Employee: "I have put my entire focus on solving the problem the team members have been skipping for months. Anyways I will go"

Manager: "My bad, I will fire the other employee"

Stepmom told me I take up the most bandwidth in the house because I have 3 monitors. ATT guy said the problem was I forwarded a Minecraft port on our router. Am I the only person who knows anything about routers?!

She: I have a problem with my android phone, I can't take screenshots since yesterday.
Me: Ehm... did you try to turn it off and on again?
She: no.. let me try.
...5 minutes later...
She: You're a genius!!!
Me: I know. 😏😎

I have had this conversation well too often:

- (him/her) Do you mind helping me with this problem I have on my computer ?
- (me) Sure, what is it ?
- (him/her) *proceeds to explaining the problem*
- (me) Ok, I don't know about this particular thing, you should try googling it.
- (the pissed off version of him/her) Never mind, I'll find someone who's willing to help me.

Please stop taking that as me not caring about your problem.
Googling things is basically what I do all day as a developer.
You really should try it. That thing is actually pretty useful.

When i said that i use Linux, 3/4 of the class stared at me like i have a mental problem.
Then i said that i use duckduckgo and they stared at me like i was really retarded.

The sad part is that i'm in computer science department and my colleagues have not any clue about anything else than microsoft/google.

I heard you have a networking problem?

Client: "I have a problem."
Me: "No problem, can you say me the error message? "
Client: "No I have clicked the message Away... "
Me: 😣🤐

Does anyone else have major issues with being interrupted whilst programming

I just lose track , I have it all in my head get an email read it try and get back into it but it takes me 10 minutes

Problem is I'm the main dev. I get a lot of emails 😔

Whenever i have a problem in code, i visit here to think. it works everytime 👍

I have a problem.

My phone has "Rant" and [Comment] burned into the screen, along with the Facebook and share buttons. It's faint, but it's absolutely there.

It is 7am on a Saturday, I am still in bed, and I have just come up with the math equation I need to solve a coding problem I spent all day yesterday. Now to figure out how to roll the fiancé off of me so I can get my laptop....

I just had a 2 hours long company lunch followed by a 1 hour meeting with the whole team. And I still have a big problem to discuss with two colleagues. Too much social interaction for one day for me. Damn, how my head hurts.

Client: Half of our barcodes aren't being recognized. Can you tell why?

Me: Ok, I will look at the problem... Open the imagens of the failed barcodes and see that all of them have a stamp over the barcode...

What I have done wrong to deserve this...

Real life job interview…
Manager: what about this problem? Could you solve it? (Showing me a problem about scanning a 2d array to find a value written on a piece of paper)

Me: sure! Just give me a piece of paper and I will write a solution.

Manager: no need for that. I don’t have the knowledge to check that anyway… if I wanted you to solve it I would have called one of my programmers.

…
Manager: do you have any question about the company?

Me: What do you exactly do in the company? I wonder what is the purpose of a person that makes questions about things he doesn’t know.

Studying Multimedia Arts, we are required to take a couple of courses in basic web development. (PHP). Since its known as new media grrr 🙄

Coming from a webdev background, I have no problem understanding PHP. However other designers in my course do.

A friend messaged me asking me how to fix a problem while in the dev environment. She tried explaining her problem without any of the terms we use in our general communication. You can read the conversation below.

When your client thinks they will get a quicker response by emailing you the same email to multiple addresses, they don't know I have a filter that sends them straight to the shithead folder skipping the inbox! Bye bye problem.

"Some people, when confronted with a problem, think "I know, I'll use regular expressions." Now they have two problems." - Jamie Zawinski

I always get a little angry when I'm looking for the solution to a problem I have with JavaScript and the answerer has the solution in JQuery. Like, not everyone uses that people!

MFW searching for a solution to an issue, I find a thread about it and the only response is:

“I don’t have this problem on my end.”

"Some people, when confronted with a problem, think 'I know, I'll use regular expressions.' Now they have two problems."
-Jamie Zawinski

Me (as a Senior developer): How will you solve this problem using regular expression?

Junior developer: *Explains*

Me: Good

Junior developer: I truly feel like a programmer when I code regular expressions

Me: Now, we have two problems.

The guy who kept asking for my help... it's not that I have a problem with that, but his problems could be solved with a very simple Google search.

a friend asks...

Friend: Hey I have this website and I'm having a problem, can you help me?
Me: surre what is it?
Friend: So I have this WordPress plugin..
Me (interrupts): Sorry I can't help you, your site is doomed

That moment when you get called by an 'Microsoft help desk' telling you have a problem with your computer...

I run on Ubuntu 16.04... Server....

I have NEVER had a trust issues with a hard-working developer. It is always good to have someone you know would move heaven and earth to solve a problem, if demanded. It was a privilege to have worked with a handful of them.

PS: If your team doesn't have one such, either be one or change the team/company!

I have a problem...

And my brain is desperate​

Omg I think I have a problem. Send help!

I have just solved a problem that had already several days ago: to apply the elimination of a specific color in a photography of animal fabrics.

Thank you SimpleCV <3

My mom runs a website and I have to help sometimes. Which is fine.

The problem is, it's a WordPress site.

Boss: I have a demo NOW, but there os an error message on that page.

Me: okay, give me sometime to elaborate the problem..

Boss: No No please, this is urgent

Me: Okay..

My code:

The student life smell is strong with my Desktop too,
and no I don't have a problem I only drink and smoke socially also when a bug takes longer than an hour to fix...

Which is most of the time

Okay I might have a little problem

If ever your code breaks, just utter these words and it will magically fix itself:

"Wtf. Hey [coworker name], Can you sanity check this code? I don't know why this segfaults! It looks fine but you just run it and it bre- oh wait... I swear it didn't work a minute ago."

New format!!!

Junior: We have a problem

Senior: Well what is it you're working on? Maybe I can-

Junior: Nevermind, got it!

Senior: ...

Junior: ...

My boss sucks really hard at English... I would not have a problem with it if he didn't insist on naming methods and variables with a non-sense English that he thinks is right...

I have a problem...

I don't understand all this chat about misrepresented groups in tech. Why is it that this forced inclusion as reached even the tech community... Personally I have no problem working with anyone, but yeah...

...in 10 years, I never worked with a female colleague, never with a black person, never with a transgender/unicorn... But I would have absolutely no problem sharing with them... Every person Ive work with so far has been very passionate about tech and software and they sure worked their asses off to have the position they have, learning everyday and coding long hours...
If you're 'misrepresented' grab a fucking book, Google, train, fight, find your way... I never had enough money to study a degree but I loved CS so much since a kid I just made myself a fucking programmer and now I'm a white, straight, male working in IT, so fucking what.

This whole racism shitshow needs to fuck off. I had a problem with a coworker today who happens to have a darker color skin than I. I was cheated, robbed, and assaulted while on the job and did nothing in response, and somehow I'm still the bad guy.

Was working on a problem yesterday, couldn't solve. Out of town today and thought of a possible solution enroute. But fuck me, coz i dont have my laptop!!

Feel so helpless!! :/

Not learning data structures and algorithms. Not learning programming languages. Actually not learning anything to answer during a job interview.

I am more of a learn-while-you-do kind of guy. I never learn anything, instead just do it. Interviewers think I am useless because I know nothing. But I can get a job done, any kind of job done. I have no learning period, I can start working from first day in a all new language, in a all new IDE, in a all new OS.

I know nothing, and I learn nothing. I am a problem solver. You got a problem, I can solve it.

Work for 2 days trying to solve a Level 2 foobar problem and then realize I need to know linear algebra to solves matrices programmatically... And the results have to be in Fractions

I had a problem to solve. So, I used regular expressions. Now I have two problems to solve.

I had a problem and I tried to solve it with regex. So now I have two problems.

The application has a system for sending reports and errors.
Client: "I have a problem with the app, I can not log in (android phone)"
I check the logs: "sent from iPhone"

(the person has no other account and registered telephone)

I'm gonna decline the next time someone asks me "hop in chat with them" to discuss their stackoverflow problem.

I'd already given my two cents about the problem in question and I thought something was unclear about that so I say okay what the hell, made a chat room and invited him in.

Him: So I have this OTHER problem with [insert JS plugin]
Me: ... I don't know enough about it. I've used that specific plugin maybe once. The question I offered you my help with was PHP.
Him: Yeah but can you take a look really quick?
Me: I'd have to reread the documentation. I literally don't remember how to use it.
Him: No problem, here's the documentation. I want to do X, Y and Z.
Me: I don't think you can X without doing A and B first.
Him: I was told not to do A, so how can I do X, Y and Z?

Fucking hell I'm not gonna do your job for you. You know english. There is documentation available. Just read it and at least try things.

Me: make me a sandwich
Her: no
Me: sudo make me a sandwich
Her: goodbye

And then I wake up and realize this "her" does not exist. I feel like I have a problem if I'm dreaming about these kind of things....

When I hear that “you don’t have to use semicolons in Kotlin / Go / whatever” uttered with such excitement and relief, I am astonished. Semicolons are a problem now? Were they ever a problem?

We are working from home & my manager keep asking me about progress every 10 minutes!

I have come to a the brink of mental breakdown. I have shut down my Skype and not answering calls and I have lied to the team that I am having internet problem just to get away from them.
Ever done that ?

I accidentally chat this on our general channel on Slack.

"I've noticed you can tell how much a British person likes you based on the amount of insults they give you."

The problem is, minute has passed. How I wish I have the time machine.

I have read everything available about blockchains and I still didn't understand why a company should need one.

I don't know if the problem is me or them

Seems VISA credit cards have a problem today and i lost some money from my account.

Decided to go full arch on desktop so i don't think about it.

I finished.
That's what installing arch looks like:

I DevRant at red lights... I have a problem.

I got stuck with a small task for days, today I just have the courage to ask for help and a senior literally gave me the code for the problem! I'm not sure if I should be happy for finishing the task or embarrassed for couldn't solve the problem by myself. 😄😥

I don't have a problem!!!!

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Just wanted to give a shout-out to this keyboard. I set out to buy a cheap full Mac keyboard that would also play well with windows, and it has overdelivered. Years old now, I have not had a single problem with it.

Backend Dev: Sir, I think we have a problem with our code. The function does have a lot of bugs in production that we can't maintain it.

Manager: Okay Front-end. You get a new Ticket. Prevent this bug by today

Front-end: Dafuck

Sometimes, I feel sorry for my colleague.

How do you deal with a problem that feels completely over your head? I want to develop side projects but sometimes I have trouble starting/continuing when I feel like I can’t find a solution after hours of research.

Who/where do you turn to to find solutions when you run into this problem? I feel like I lose determination when I run into a wall I can’t get around.

Colleague: Ivy, I have a problem with blah blah.
(Meanwhile we are in two different places)
Me: I'm not sure I understand your problem. Just Google it.
Colleague: I don't want to.
Me: Okay bye.

Question: Are Developers who use Google impostors?

This is what my iPhone seems to suggest in most locations. I don't have a problem. It must be a bug.

i just spent 3 hours on a problem that could have been solved in 12 lines.

i really hate myself sometimes

Updated the site Joomla from 3.6 to 3.7. Then got a call saying some pages weren't working. "No problem," I said, "we have backups." Restored a backup, but then found out it was corrupt... The entire site went down 😭

We seem to have a problem, if I leave the 50k club, there'll be no one in the 50k club 😦

Come on you 40k clubbers, you need to pick up the slack!

Me: This is a good article about a CSS problem I always have and can never remember how to fix. Imma bookmark that.

Me, the next time I have that problem: Dang. Why doesn't this work. Better Google it.

That awkward moment...

... when someone tells you that they have found an amazing technique for a common problem and you are like:

"erhm... I was already using that for years... I thought you knew it too..."

It's almost 10 pm now. For some reason, I have a sudden strong urge to code something till morning. The problem is I don't know what to code.

I found weird that some developer never ask why when facing a problem. "What do you mean never ask why?" here some story.

Let's say a developer work with simple app. Laravel as Backend and Postgresql as Database. He face a problem that the app very slow when searching data.

In order to solve that problem he implement cache using redis but he found problem that it fast occasionally. In order to solve that problem he implement elasticsearch because he think elasticsearch very good for search but he found another problem that sometimes data on postgresql out of sync with data on elasticsearch. In order to solve that problem he implement cronjobs to fix out of sync data but he found another problem that cronjobs cannot fix out of sync data in real time. and so on...

Do you see the problem? He never ask why the app slow. Which part search the data? Backend or Database (Search in the Backend mostly slower than Database because Backend have to get all data on database first). Has the query been optimized? (limit offset, indexing). How about the internet connection? etc.

For me it's important to ask why when facing a problem and try to solve the problem as simple as possible.

Any one else have a problem buying gadgets they don't need? I just bought an Amazon Echo and not entirely sure what to do with it. I also have about 6 waiting to be shipped from kickstarters

Me: We have a style problem.

SM: No problem! I can solve it with JavaScript. I just need to manage the DOM in the Angular Controller :D

Me: Really? I found the solution with just 1 CSS line.

Dear recruiters,

I have no problem if you write me an e-mail or a private message on linkedin.
But don't assume I will accept your contact requests. That will be a bit suspicious considering my company's management is also on linkedin, don't you think?

I have the same problem as @linuxxx does. Buying things when I really don't need to.

I went to a mall with a friend today because his headset was literally falling apart. We both bought new headsets. Great.

Lesson learned: Don't leave your house unless necessary.

Am I dumb/blind or devrant could use the reply on the rant itself? I have a problem when wanting to tag the creator and I have to type the username (if not previously replying on the rant)..which usually means switching between the rant and comment several times before I get it right.. :/

The amount of times i go to the toilet and solve a code problem whilst there...

I think all offices should just have toilets for chairs.

Today
I was working on a project for the uni, went to have a nap and take a break.
The problem I was coding java in my dream.
I WANT A BREAK!!!!!!!!!!

I have a problem.
I can't let an email, message or notification unread ! I must clear them all so I don't see any notification.
Shit this is serious, I feel uncomfortable if there is a notification !

Anyone have this?

I'm starting to think that "Machine Learning" is the most unfortunate term that the industry has ever seen.

How people approach a problem here where I work: "I have a problem, I don't know how to solve it, I don't have any data. Let's implement a Machine Learning algorithm that will solve the problem for me."

Why Netflix?? What's your problem if I have a private browsing habit? Your friend Amazon Prime doesn't complain about it!!

My best skill is problem is:
*** problem solving ***
Really, at least in all the teams I've been working until now, I'm always surprised by myself. How fast I am in spotting the problem root and find or suggest a solution. Even on things I have almost no knowledge.

My worst skill is:
*** problem solving ***
Being so effective make me everybody's slave.
Everybody always rely on me for any kind of weird shit. If I try to "outsource" the problem, after one day it will bounce back on me and I solve it in no time.

So I've no time for anything else that solving other people's problems.
Constant interruptions and context switching.
And worst, my bosses don't understand why I don't finish my tasks. And I cannot blame my team.

Just came back from vaccation yesterday. During sprint retrospective today I hear my team was having trouble dealing with the API layer (which was mostly written by me). Suggestion was a session where I sit and explain the application to the team ,which I have no problem with.

One of my teammates asserts that it's written in such a way that "only the person who wrote it can modify it".

Agree to disagree but whatever. This thing goes through code review everytime I push changes to it. If there was a problem I don't know why he's just discovering it 6 months into the project. I assure you there's no rocket surgery going on. The problem is that I have been doing everything on that side of the project and nobody was curious enough to give it a read sometime. In fact I dont think anything needed to change while I was on vacation, they just didn't have me to troubleshoot every problem for them like usual 😤

The problem with being a designer and a programmer is that Photoshop and Illustrator is on Windows and I code on Ubuntu.

You have to restart and boot a different OS everytime goddamnit

Couldn't sleep last night so I woke up at 5 am and started coding. Do I have a problem guys?

!rant

Have to do some JS for a web application.

Problem is I'm not a JS expert at all, and there is already existing code.
Gonna be long.

Gimme your energy so I can do it \o/

As a developer I have a problem I have to get over and it's called: negative spiral thinking. It's the biggest impediment to progress (that and bureaucracy).

You sit there facing a problem, you keep focusing on the problem, but the problem spouts other problems and then you care too much about those other problems and you start fussing around, negative thoughts start to spout everywhere and you end up continuously losing your focus.

Blah.

Got out of bed, went to toilet to take a piss and as i was finishing pissing my eyesight got blurry, i felt dizzy, losing energy and then i just woke up laying on the floor without remembering anything what happened. I fucking passed out. My head hurts cause i hit it on something during fall. Fuck off. I have enough problems already and the least problem i need is a health problem now

Me: Hits blocking bug in someone else's code. Everyone's busy and stressed, I'll have a look myself. Find the problem, find associated documentation. In a language I don't really know, so pass this to appropriate dev.
Them: It's not a problem for me.
Me: ... Wut?

I don't work there anymore...

I joined in June to work on a project due to release in July. It released in December.

I've just spent half and hour trying to fix a problem when I remembered that Arch upgrades kernels in-place and I just have to reboot.
Because deleting the CURRENTLY RUNNING KERNEL is definitely a sane thing to do...

Sorry guys but I have to vent!

I made such a stupid mistake I want to kill myself right now. In short you can call it ignorance..........

I spent so many hours trying to find a solution to a problem of invalid signatures being reported by an OAuth provider I'm making, just to find that Chrome was blocking requests to http.

So it was not a problem, to begin with. Aaaaarrh........ I'm so mad at myself.

My GF is also a programmer. But we rarely talk about coding stuff.

Everything is fine with just one problem.

When I have a good focus on whatever I'm doing, I have trouble giving attention to other things and people around me. When doing Programming especially.

So I often feel bad that I couldn't give her enough care and time.

So after joining devRant I discovered that some people have an issue with people touching "their code"...

This hasn't been a problem anywhere I've ever worked, with any person (that I know of).

Is this a vocal minority, or have I somehow avoided this subset of people through sheer luck?

Went to bed last night with my code not working. Woke up, ran the app and IT WORKED! I have no clue what I did last night it's all a blur, but apparently I fixed the problem in my sleep. #SleepCoder

Do you wear a wristwatch? For style or confidence? I have a problem wearing one. It gets in the way as I type on my keyboard. Or am I wearing it wrong?

yeah..

customer: I have a problem.
Smart Cell: here's a math problem, just divide it 3 times by 1024

I'm testing a shitforbrains code in production because I don't have any other options. He went on vacation and said that the code should work, and if it doesn't it is my problem.

I am contemplating taking a shit under his desk and working from home. Then he would have to deal with my shit aswell. Literally.
The tables have turned my friend...

University is a dumb place.

Example:

I have been restricted to a predefined list of projects for my dissertation. The trouble is, the project must be a solution to an existing problem. So we're given a product to develop which then requires us to actively search for an implementation which addresses a problem.

Not only have we not proposed a solution ourselves but have also been given a list of software requirements. Wouldn't be an issue if we hadn't been pushed to write about our "requirements gathering" process.

So we have to gather requirements that are the requirements we have been given but do it in an independent way. Yeah, sure.

I am genuinely just going the motions with this fucking place now.

I have a problem. I'll use regexp! Now I have two problems!

Me : Hey Azure, I have a problem with "this" blade in Azure portal. It's not working

Azure : Disable your adblock

Me : NO

Waiting next response

I finished a 30-minute lecture today with the conclusion "so it turns out that throwing way more data and resources at this Machine Learning problem gives much better results."

Who could have possibly predicted that?!

Now I know the solution to a work problem I want to go back to work WTF.... have a break and relax!

I have used Mac since 2011 and I have made statements about how Windows PCs sucks.
I had to buy a Windows-laptop for engineering school and I have experienced problem after problem after problem.

It took about a month to get the right computer (I ordered online and they missed to add an extra hard drive).

I had to return the second one after 10 days because it was not able to boot.
The third one I had to send to HPs repair place in Poland for a week, because the “X”-button” did not work properly.

I have not used the computer for a couple of weeks and now I was going to create an Android Studio-project and found out that the extra hard drive is missing! (Not physically missing, it does not show up)
When I bought the computer I had to portion the disk, but this time it is not showing up in that tool either...

I find it way easier to read code than ordinary text.

Am I the only one? Do I have a problem?
After the first sentence my I eyes can't focus to keep reading text. This also happens to my native language except from English.

Planned on installing Linux, for the first time, on a old computer today. Turns out you need a usb-stick to install it from. Minimum 2gb. - No problem, I thought, because I have a old stick in a drawer. Turns out it was on 128mb. Outdated technology. Time to go shopping.

I have a problem calling ressources.
I have a list of 4 ppl that can help me.

3 of them have no idea and the fourth is too busy to answer me.

fuck

Since learning how to program, I have started to see the world in a different way. The algorithmic and Mathematical way of approaching computing problems I have adapted to approach all of my problems. Everything is just a problem that can be solved by taking a logical approach!

Hello, brilliant minds!

I am participating in a hackathon based on web development and I need to submit potential problem statements for the same. They have some predetermined domains, but I am unable to look for a suitable problem. The domains are:

1. eCommerce
2. eGovernance: Smart City
3. Fitness
4. Social Innovation
5. Tool/Library/Extension for devs
6. Travel
7. Women's safety

I will have 6 hours to code. Please suggest some of your best ideas. Thanks in advance!

Love,
TheSlug

The most annoying thing about being an IT professional...

Microsoft never calls me to tell me there is a problem with my computer. WTF!

I use Linux, but still, I totally miss all the fun I would have with that wanker...

At work, how often do you create your own apps? As opposed to adding a new feature to an existing one?

I am thinking maybe the biggest difference between me and everyone else on my team is because I have a lot more experience creating my own apps.

So when I get a problem I tend to start by thinking how to create a new app for it, what would be the ideal way to solve the problem. And then if needed, figure out how to integrate it into an existing project.

Whereas everyone else thinks about how to solve a problem within the context (and constraints) of an existing app.

I have a confession to make...I am a PHP developer with a Python problem!

I have been at my job for four months. I do 99% of the research on a problem or a fix - another employee recognizes the remaining 1 % and looks like a champ.

I have a problem to solve but I just can't come up with any working algorithm or idea to solve it. I feel really fucking stupid right now

Sometimes I feel people are too damn slow.
Usually I have to outpace every particular person in the sidewalk.
Some of my dev friends have the same problem too, so I guess it should have something to do with being a dev.

QA: There is a problem
Me: Ok how do I reproduce it?
QA: You do x
Me: I have done x and there isn’t a problem
QA: Oh it only happens sometimes
Me: Fair enough, I’ll try a few times
...
Me: Are you sure x is how you do it?
QA: Oh no actually it’s y

FML

Well, i solved a pretty hard problem I had today with Firebase and a pretty tricky data model, so I guess I am pretty excited to have solved that problem right now!

I frequently run into the problem of overthinking instead of just doing something.

But then I feel conflicted with myself if I felt that there could have been a better way to do something instead of just doing it for the sake of doing it.

Got a new team and teammember who has been here for years seemed not so happy having me now as lead. No problem, i even can understand him a bit. Still, if you have a f***** problem there are better times to address them then every f***** time at stand-ups. -.-

So I have a job at a client to fix their system because the last systemadmin fucked everything up. One of the things I need to do is let the boss work from home.

No problem. I set up a vpn connection to work and everything just works. Except that the home network had the same dhcp range so that had to change.

I login on the router and literally everything is fucking locked. I call them and they send me a new router same fucking problem. So we bought an asus router so I finally can fix it.

QUESS WHAT THE FUCKING GARBAGE DOESNT EVEN HAVE BRIDGE MODE. FUCK KPN AND THEIR MODEMS.

I hate this joke. It makes zero sense; not something I'd expect to see all over an app for devs!

A factory creates something, if I already have a problem, why would I need a factory to create more?

Over 100+ learning about, and configuring my i3 .config, .vimrc, .bashrc, etc. Exactly how I want it. Then one day: "Meh, time to reinstall and delete all configs!"
I have a serious problem.

I gave a technical interview today and here is summary how it went . interviewer asked me to login to leetcode account then .

Interviewer :- "Open this problem( he gave link) and open submission section".

Me :- "Yes sir" I opened it and I have solved that in past .

Interviewer :- "okay so you have solved this one so let's move to next question(2nd)".

I opened it and again I have already solved that in past. Then he gave 3rd and it was also solved by me already .

Then he said " Okay now I will share with you this problem which you have not solved and I am sure ".

He gave me a hard problem which I actually haven't solved . I would have solved the first 3 , the 4th one was actually hard and I was not able to optimise my code on time .

sometimes life is really tough 😪. he could have asked anyone of them 😕.

God I hate React so bad
I get the hype but omg it is so confusing
Literally everytime I try adding something nothing works and I have to troubleshoot, EVERYTHING is a problem
And don't even get me started on REACT + TYPESCRIPT

IMO VueJS is just a smoother nicer experience overall

I need ideas for a 10 hour hackathon I'm about to have on this flight guys! What problem can be solved without the internet?

Things you should probably not say in an interview += "I like Rust because I get to write a lot of code before performance starts to become a problem and I have to optimize"

Friend: have you ever noticed this problem X? What if we could...

Me: stop right there, I smell a kickstarter

GitLab, why do you don't want to have my money? I just wanted to pay for GitLab Bronze to enable Pull Mirroring. The problem is that I cannot register for billing without having a company. GitLab, I am a single private person. I am not a company! Why do I have to fill out these form fields? So if you don't want to have my money, then you will not get it.

Ubuntu 16 lts wifi drivers have problem and i am unable to fix this shit, everytime there's a new problem with ubuntu I hate ubuntu now for these many problems I'm not going to use it again.
If I didn't find any good linux distro I think I should switch to mac

When windows decides to force you to update when shutting down, like no problem, not like I have a fucking deadline or anything.

!rant
I have a question; when I get interrupted while coding (dinner, friends etc) I'm often "stuck" in my head while just thinking about the problem I were to solve in the code. Anyone else have this? Does it have a name and any tips to "let the code go" while not coding?

Loosing faith...

Interesting question.

I don't think skills have something to do with faith.

If you don't know something, ask someone who does.

Even If I cannot solve a problem or deem a problem unsolvable, I usually don't doubt myself.

There are rare moments where I throw a fit, but that's not loosing faith, thats just being angry because my stubborn thick skull cannot make sense of it, which annoys me.

Might sound cocky, but in my opinion dev skills are not "do or die". Problem could be solved at a later time, maybe never. Who cares?

Loosing faith would mean to me that I define myself in some way on the ability to solve sth that doesn't have to be solved at all.

XD

After all, if it doesn't work, I don't give a fuck.

*Cheers*.

I hate every non -American in my office who tries to flaunt a stupid fucked up American accent when we are trying to discuss a logical problem. Fuck the accent , do you have a solution you fucked up asshole.

Tldr; Do not go to the bathroom when you are stuck on a problem.

Most of you will know that when you are stuck on a problem for a while, that it is worth to take a break to look at the problem with a fresh pair of eyes.

It's good advice and I have been doing it for years, however now I have developed a problem with it.....

I don't drink coffee or tea often so when I'm stuck I always take a bathroom break and most of the time an Idea will pop into my head how to solve the problem.

The problem now is that everytime when I am even a little bit stuck I need to go to the bathroom even when I just went.

It's really annoying because now I need to find something else to use as a break because my brain has associate being stuck with needing to go to the bathroom.

It's probably not a good idea to take a coffee break instead because if my brain starts to associate that I will be a coffee addict in no time.... Haha

Do any of you have a good suggestion to use as a break?

Hey, I have a cool idea about a new way to solve a problem our users are having!
Type type type, now I have a working prototype! Show it to the team, everyone loves it. Polish it a little, it works really great!
Now let's test it on an iPad like the ones our users have... Nope, nothing works, undefined is not a function.

F*CK YOU SAFARI, you're why we can't have nice things. 😤

Put on big headphones, explain you are busy, or just show that you’re not in a good mood.

No seriously, i so don’t have a problem with PMs here. If i receive 2 emails in a day i can call it busy already. Including the daily standup then ofcourse.

To be able to actually write useful tests BEFORE starting to code, which I guess is really asking for the ability to have a clear set of requirements and a complete mental model of the problem at hand

So a guy told me about a problem he has, and I showed him a tool that I have built that solve his exact problem, but he answered "Nah thanks I am good".

What ? Why ? Are you stupid ? It's free

I think one of my biggest mistakes as a dev in the becoming is to have tried to produce code rather than think code.

The patience to try and understand a problem rather than just solve it.

After spending 2 hours on what seemed like a ridiculously small issue，i know what the problem was before solving it.

Which meant i did take longer to solve it but i DID NOT take the wrong direction. Which would ultimately have come back to my face some time soon.

Coding takes a fuck load of time -_-.

Some days as a new programmer I feel like a complete loser. Spent 6 hours trying to solve a problem and nothing has worked. Ugh gonna have to try to sleep this one off...

I ordered a new, speedy, 128gb patriot flash drive last week. I was so excited! I was going to partition it into a fat32 partition, and a bootable Ubuntu with persistence. Now I have the drive and that seems like something I might fuck up, and I don't know why I needed this so badly. I remembered the 10+ 8gb drives I have laying around. I have a problem.

So I asked a question on Stackoverflow. I got my answer and solved my problem, it improved my reputation to 15 (can upvote and post comments). But I have also got a question ban now as my questions were not good enough 🤷🏻‍♂️

I wouldn't have a problem with opinionated tools
Unfortunately, their opinions tend to be retarded

hey guess what

commenting "I have this problem too!" does absolutely nothing for a github thread. ABSOLUTELY nothing.

you are bad and you should feel bad

goodbye

Apparently I don't have a problem with lack of games... Over the years I bought a lot of Humble Bundles which I apparently never fully redeemed...

I just redeemed some today while getting one with Dirt 4... (was actually planning to buy that yesterday from Steam just to test) I now have 54 games in the Library...

When a friend told you that they have a problem and needs a Computer Science student's help ..

.. and it's about a broken flash drive.
I can't even fix my broken C code let alone fix a freaking flash drive.

@dfox

I have a problem with my Samsung galaxy S7 since the last update. When a friend share me a devrant link thought SMS it will open the link inside the Samsung internet browser not with the devRant application.

I'm a lazy ass person and I wanna learn web development.
However, I only have one problem.
I don't have a computer, or even a laptop.

Problem of developers
When he tries to sleep at night, the code he wrote that day comes to his mind and he starts thinking opps I would have done that in a better way like this. I would have optimised that function like this. ok tomorrow I will do these changes.

Me: Searching for a problem I have been trying to solve for 6 hours
StackOverflow: [Another user with the same exact problem]

Me [Relieved and Excited]: [Scrolled down to see the answer]
[Empty] :-(

[Scroll up to read comments]
@stackuser1 - Hey did you try doing [blah... blah.. blah..]
@OP - Hey never mind fixed it

So I had a problem ...
I 've decided to use Java ...
Now I have a ProblemFactory !😮

What is the longest time any of you have been debugging one problem?
For me it was at my first internship where I was creating a multithreaded qt application. I had a problem that took me two weeks to figure out. I was trying to call a function from a qt thread when it wasn't the main thread. Took me two weeks to figure that out since it was my first time doing multithreaded applications, and the fix was dead simple.
Any similar stories?

I have a piece of software pulling data from a database. I have been having a problem storing time values correctly, so I am running some tests with the customer. He has some data for Sunday and he says "Oh chick fil a should be empty!" Idk why I think it's funny but we are guaranteed test data because of the Bible.

I'm 17 and I already have a coffee problem!! I drink 5 to 6 cups of coffee a day!! I need to slow down..

* talking with coworker about how to use a certain library *

* other coworker comes in *
"Oh I have experience in that library. Perhaps I could help"

* we explain our problem *
"Hmmm yeah, you should probably refer to the docs."

Helpful 1000!

!dev

I have a homies problem. Where do you get yourself some homies?

My friend has a little problem. He wants to clearly reinstall windows, format partitions and install it again. I was very surprise with question: "Do I have to remove Windows folder and remove everything else?"

I got stuck in a shitty situatuion in which i have to choose between being a front-end+mobile developper and back-end. I have to answer my company today, the problem is that i like both domains.
HELP !!!

I have a recurring problem with Typescript where I can't search types for errors because all search engines are flooded with questions and articles about type checker errors.

Having my first memory leak problem ever. This sucks. I've tried what seems like everything. Forcing garbage collection every time I press a key to try and debug the issue. Fuck. I have 'using' blocks everywhere, and I have no idea what I'm doing wrong.

Just thought of a solution to a problem I'm having with an open source library. Now I can't sleep until I have made a pull request! It's 00:17 and I've just found out my Macbook is dead.

Take a break sometimes. Go outside in fresh air and explain the problem to your self out loud. Doing this has made me ask myself the following question many times: "Why the hell have i just spent hours working on this problem and not realized this simple solution?"

Can we patent an Idea? I have my product A ready for launch. Company B claims that we have patent for that idea. We both trying to solve exact same problem using exact same methodology. How should I proceed? Any legal advisors here?

I once was righting a C project for my professor, and I had a problem that I didn't know the solution, once I copied the script in the main into a function it worked perfectly.
And still have no idea of what happened.

I have to press ctrl+s to save current changes every short time in coding..
I think one human should write a plugin or script for this problem😆

Done this a few times.... Client emails, there's a problem with the website and basic details. I check website and quickly fix said problem. Email back, it's fine for me, try refreshing the page or clearing the cache.

We should have a code name for the old clear cache routine. Any ideas?

Have you ever been so frustrated with a problem that you almost posted a question to Stackoverflow.com just to find your answer minutes later?

Which reminds me, I need to comment on that thread where I found my answer. It wasn't entirely correct...

My Tabmanagment, or the lack of it.
When I'm in problem solving mode I have easily 40tabs+ open, because I might need some which are already open. I distinguish them by the favicon of the Google tab. Each Google tab and the following tabs are separate problems/tasks so I kinda have a timeline "the one in the middle was the problem I had 30mins ago".
I also have no bookmarks, I start always with min. 5 Tabs. I guess I don't know how to browser :|

Hi, I'm a computer science student and I have problems with myself. I'm always afraid and have very low confidence and it's killing me right now. I have a machine problem/assignment and instead if trying to solve it, i resort in looking for answers. I've tried solving it though but i cant. This has always been since im in college. Any tips or suggestion will help.

I finally have nailed it make a working neural network for my data with tensorflow. Problem? It isn't satisfied with 10gb of my memory. Just 4 layers...

McDonald's has a Window problem... And a really slow customer...

I have a buying problem tho.... Just bought an OP6 this morning and rationalized it by saying I need a new camera and my monthly maintenance is $500 anyway so...

I have used a lot of different languages and built solutions or solved problems that others can't. I am to be able to pick up new things quickly and start using them.

Does that make me a generalist or a specialist (in problem solving)?

I can't really figure out how I grew from learning_syntax -> remembering_function_names -> following_patterns -> developing_a_personal_style -> reading_the_doc -> getting_the_source.

Well I have a long memory problem, so I guess it happened overnight!

Wait, did the doctor say it was a memory problem? Hell no!

I have a 5 hour layover until my next flight and all I want to do is code to kill time... the only problem is there is no reachable power outlet..

client: Your sh** page doesn't work, i haven't been able to do a single sale in hours...
me: have you tried to reload the page?
client: Of course i... oh wait, that was the problem, thanks anyways

First-world problem: my blueberries are rotten! I rescued enough for my daily portion of quark, and threw the rest out. WHY CAN'T THE SUPERMARKETS HAVE BLUEBERRIES THAT DON'T ROT IN LESS THAN A WEEK?

That amazing feeling one feels all over their body when they finally crack the problem they have been trying to solve for weeks.

Feels amazing. I need more of that. In a pill form. Thanks.

As a dev, I have to reuse a lot of codes again and again. Some I've written, and some of them I found after stucking my head for 1 hour on StackOverflow.

Now, the problem is every time I need the code, I have to search again. Some of them I saved in note apps but organizing code snippets & finding them with a quick search is a mess.

I was thinking of building a code snippet organizer where developers can save code snippets in any language (have syntax highlighting), search quickly, share with anyone, create buckets, manage multiple accounts etc.

Let me know if it's a good idea or not. Would you be interested in using something like this? Is this even a real problem or it's just me?

Not me but, my boss chose to use devexpress "just as a visual layer" without studying devexpress deeply, this means that everyday i have to study some random devexpress quirk to fix a clients problem.

DevRant might not be a perfect place for that question but what the hell.
This is a question for people that do side projects, not only programming but electronic and mechanical as well. If you are a student even better.
(I dont wanna discourage non students but i have limited resources here...)

So the question:
While making a project have you ever had a problem where a limited access to tools was the problem?
(maybe tools was here but nobody wanted to borrow you because of paperwork or some bs.)

I mean that you had a idea or was in middle of a project and you didnt finished/(finished but in crappy condition) because lack of proper tools didnt allow you to?

I realy need your opinion on that subject, i have a nice idea i just have to test the waters.
And please tell me if you are a student or not.