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I once set a customers server on fire.
Litterally.
I put my laptop ontop of the server rack and the additional heat generated caused blue smoke to fill the room.
The whole building had to be evacuated.
Firetrucks came.
The customer eyeballed me quite a bit after he talked to the firemarshal regarding where the fire had originated.10 -
A programmer and a business analyst are sitting in the break room one day eating lunch when suddenly the microwave catches fire. Thinking quickly, the analyst leaps up, unplugs the microwave, grabs the trash can, fills it with water from sink, and dumps the water on the microwave to put out the flames.
A few weeks later the two are again having lunch in the break room when suddenly the coffee maker bursts into flames. The programmer leaps up, grabs the coffee maker, shoves it into the microwave oven, and then hands the trash can to the business analyst, thus re-using the solution developed for the previous project.4 -
Holy crap, just consulted with a company who wanted to fire the entire 6 person backend team because:
"They don't produce any tangible work or add value to the company."
Initially I didn't catch on, went to chat with the devs and realised the dilemma. Took 3 hours of (almost heated) debate before the higher ups understood the the value and purpose of backend devs.
This is a kitchen appliance company who recently moved into IoT 🙃12 -
Sometimes I feel frontend development is like ancient magic:
Backend Dev: Oh no, I can't align this DIV properly.
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Flexius Boxius on the DIV *
* Div aligns slightly better *
BE Dev: But it's not centered!
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Marginis Automaticus! *
* Rolls natural 1 *
* Everything collapses *
* Website is on fire *
* Product owner cries *
FE Dev: No worries!
* Casts Flexius Boxius level 5 on the parent div *
* Everything looks beautiful *
* People are in awe *
FE Dev: You are welcome!
* Adjusts his robe and leaves *8 -
!rant
*Theoretical computer scientist is at an interview.*
Interviewer: “Imagine that you are walking down a road and see a house on fire. What do you do?”
CS Guy: “I dial the police and tell them that the house is on fire.”
Interviewer: “Good. Now, imagine that you are walking down the same road, and you see that the same house is not on fire. What do you do?”
CS Guy: *Ponders for a little while.* “I put the house on fire and reduce it to a problem I’ve solved before.”10 -
*Theoretical computer scientist is at an interview.*
Interviewer: “Imagine that you are walking down a road and see a house on fire. What do you do?”
CS Guy: “I dial the police and tell them that the house is on fire.”
Interviewer: “Good. Now, imagine that you are walking down the same road, and you see that the same house is not on fire. What do you do?”
CS Guy: *Ponders for a little while.* “I put the house on fire, thus reducing it to a problem I’ve solved before.”2 -
FUCK OFF. It's 2 days before a deadline, I'm wearing headphones and clearly focused and you have the fucking audacity to interrupt me because you're fucking bored? Go light yourself on fire you fucking cunt6
-
Today we were all called into a meeting and the CEO was livid. He went on a rage about how the CTO was wasting money on useless shit (GitHub Enterprise). He said I bought laptops for a reason if there’s a fire someone better protect our assets and code. He wouldn’t reason with us and went into github and deleted everything. The CTO was fired and no one is leading our team. Wondering if I should quit 😶
29 -
Honestly if the StackOverflow community was set on fire and I had a huge tank of water
People in Africa wouldn't die from thrist anymore.14 -
If you disrupt my working flow and you're not
1) On fire.
2) About to explode.
3) You're dog is dead(dogs are the shit)
4) Snoop dog is in the building
Then you're a cunt.19 -
Being a programmer is easy!
It's like riding a bike
Except
The bike is on fire
you're on fire
everything is on fire
and you're in hell4 -
Me 5 years ago : "Guys we are gonna have a perf..."
CEO : "Not now, we need to deliver that functionality asap"
Me 3 years ago : "Guys, performances/scalibiluity will hit us like a trucK'
CEO : "Not nowem a new functionality needs to be done ASAP"
Me 1 year ago : "We are gonna be hit by a tank. We won't even understand what happens"
CEO : "I'm sure we can manage"
2 Days ago : Plateform quasiment down, response time in MIONUTES instead of milliseconds, database on fire.
CEO : "WHAT THE FUCK !!! GO FIXC I ASAP WE CANNOT HAVE THAT SHIT HAPPEN".
This is a brief summaru of working in a startup.9 -
CSS is easy. It’s like riding a bike, which is on fire and the ground is on fire and everything is on fire because it is hell.7
-
Planning a camping trip with my friends.
Friend1: I’ll bring the snacks.
Friend2: I’ll bring the equipment to build the tents.
Friend3: I’ll bring the first aid kit.
Everybody: who’s bringing the equipment to make the fire?
Me: I’ll do that. I’ll just run Android Studio on my laptop.
Everybody: woah woah man! Take it easy! We just want a simple fire, not burn the whole forest down!7 -
I had a nightmare I was at work, the building was on fire, but I couldn't get out.
I'm more terrified that in this nightmare, my boss told me he uses devrant.17 -
Friends Pandemic December proposal: "We should all get on Zoom every weekend, play Christmas trivia games and do shots"
Family ideal Pandemic December: "Lets send each other Secret Santa presents throughout the whole month, and get on Zoom and unpack them"
Me: Chilled out on a reclining seat next to a freshly slaughtered green fir tree, burning hearth fire, warm wool sweater, faux fur slippers, big mug of liquored up hot chocolate, keyboard on my lap, writing a Rust library on big screen TV.
Sorry friends & family, y'all are doing holidays wrong.
Happy holidays.
-- signed, Grandpa Bittersweet.12 -
I really love my job these cold, rainy autumn days with yellow trees, where I can work from home having a nice fire going in the fireplace and the dog sleeping on my feet :-)
9 -
I just shat my pants:
I accidentally typed "ebay.vom", and I was redirected to "navigation.nsgnav.com" before sending me to "ebay.com".
In that split second, I thought it redirected me to some "nsa.gov" server.
I almost set my laptop on fire and ran to Mexico.10 -
Citizens are advised not to use Firewalls on their devices or Networks, as there can be a fire threat from enabling those.
An active cooperation is expected from everyone.
Stay safe and have a nice day :)4 -
> in da zone, headphones beating, caffeine rushing through my veins, snack-stack at 75%, code and commands flowing like campaign promises, I'm one with the keyboard... I can feel it ~(◉_◉)~
roomie: Hey J! J!
me: ಠ_ಠ I'm kinda busy, what do you want?
roomie: Dude don't forget to pick up bla bla bla
me: Okay
> Headphones back on, feeling the h4ckx0r fire resurge through my gut like a majestic phoenix (not to be confused with taco tuesday gut fire)
roomie: J...J! dude also make sure bla bla bla
me: ಠ╭╮ಠ I know, you don't need to be so specific with me.
> Headphones on...about to hit play again...
roomie: Dude do you happen to know bla bla bla
(ಥ﹏ಥ)
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
FUCK! just tell me everything at once so I can go back to ignoring you and the irrelevant world around me!
I hate when people do this.8 -
Manager: "Good Morning"
Employee: "Okay"
Manager: "You are fired. I deserve a proper reply"
Employee: "I have put my entire focus on solving the problem the team members have been skipping for months. Anyways I will go"
Manager: "My bad, I will fire the other employee"7 -
> Get home for lunch, time to get some work done
> Fire up windows to program my keyboard
> WindowsUpdate, fine I can wait
> Reboot, grub rescue - no partition found
> Fire up a live CD, windows update nuked my linux partition (literally - now empty space instead of my previous ubuntu partition)
> Reinstall ubuntu
> Now stuck on «Loading operating system»
Oh well, I know what I'm doing tonight
> Pic related
16 -
Was running tests on a big project I'm doing which still contains a fair amount of bugs but I was sure that all thresholds would succeed and the test wouldn't fire an alert.
Ran the test: alert received any fucking way.
FUCK.
*checks rule*
*waaaait a second, I've set the threshold differently by accident...*
HOLY SHIT THIS MEANS IT WORKS 😵
*pats project* - "good project 😊"1 -
Working on a project called ...fire... on linux, when suddenly realised, that
`$ touch fire` is a bad idea4 -
When you get so excited you burst out signing "🎶MY CODE IS ON FIRE🎶"(Alicia keys "this girl is on fire" reference) forgetting your in a room with your fellow developers.....
5 minutes later there still laughing3 -
I’m back at devRant.
I was active few years back.
What made me comeback is me deciding to delete social media apps in my main phone.
The reason for deleting is that some topics/post/feed triggers a painful experience I had this year.
The painful experience is my wife cheated on me.
I’m not here for pity.
I just want to let the married ones know here that it’s not all about coding or work.
You should also try to keep the fire burning with your significant other.
Else someone comes by and will keep that fire lit.5 -
Finally got myself a Lytro Illum!
I,v been wanting to buy one since it came out but the company who made it closed down in 2015..
Thoose fuckers just thrown everything in the trash and set it on fire, software, firmware, mobile app etc.. no open source, no archives, your expensive camera is now a paper weight! You’r welcome!
So i got myself a new hobby, started reverse-engineering the fuck out of it, luckily it’s based on android (api17), i have adb and it’s running a hidden DHCP server too so it’s coming along nicely :D
I’m planning to make a camera control mobile app for it and maybe some faster image processing, wifi sharing etc..
I love beeing in home office :D
19 -
My macbook air sort of exploded. I was working on it when suddenly it made a pop sound, turned off and exhaled a smelly smoke. This machine has 2 and a half years.
I called apple support but they said the smoke is OK since there wasn't any fire, and I should take it to a repair shop.
Oh well.20 -
Chase Bank Burning by Alex Schaefer
"This is a "plein air" painting which means I set up my easel right across the street of this Chase bank in my city and painted it like it had caught fire. The police questioned me on the spot. Three weeks later Homeland Security was knocking on the door to my home. The question they kept asking me was "Do you hate these banks?" I can honestly say yes."
9 -
I was on call with a colleague. A very quiet guy that always made the weirdest commentaries.
Anyhow, I received a message about a datacenter issue. Checked everything and it seemed a load balancer failure, so one of us should go to the datacenter (it was Saturday).
My colleague volunteered and after 4 hours I still could not see the changes. He wasn't replying the messages or anything.
I ran to the office, saw his phone on the table and went to the datacenter.
I open the door and the crazy dude is banging 2 chicks (paid version) on the room, bottle of vodka around... he gets scared and threatens to throw water and vodka on the blades if I fire him. I am so speechless that he calms down, I fix the balancer and we go home...
I was so pissed and impressed... I had to fire him. He didn't show up on monday and resigned. I still told the CTO and we could see the videos of his experience on the cctv... funny dude...2 -
Uh...all of them? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I used to work with a 'floor supervisor' who vaped excessively and obnoxiously. He had one of those things that made vapor like a space shuttle launch too. When he was talking during conference calls or presentations, rapt attention and respect were demanded. When anyone else was presenting, *whoosh*, big cloud of vapor, right in front of the screen, right in the presenter's face. It looked like the building was on fire ten minutes in. Opening the door was like getting out of a car that's been hotboxed. That guy was a douche.2 -
CSS is easy. Its like riding a bike, which is on Fire and the ground is on fire and everything is on fire because It is hell.7
-
A PR I raised was left un-reviewed for 3 months. And finally when shit hit the fan, I was asked why I never worked on the fix.
I pointed to the PR I raised 3 months ago and I got absolutely flamed for it because obviously, it was my fault that I did my part, asked for a review and moved on to other tasks.
According to my manager, I should have kept pushing for the PR to be reviewed.
I wanted to set the office on fire that day.5 -
When I worked as an IT student and was asked what we could do to ensure the destruction of data on old drives. I suggested lighting the office on fire while blindly firing guns into the inferno. To this day I don't know why they laughed.3
-
When you are coding, put your coffeepot on fire, and forgot about it for two hours.
My life suck tonight.
11 -
Big project this week. Lots of fires to put out. Deadlines approaching.
Monday: I can get by on just four hours sleep. No problem. Will be just like college.
Wednesday: I'm going to just close my eyes while this file uploads. Maybe I will backup the server while I'm at it; Just take a nap while that processes.
Friday: Sorry if my office smells like vomit. It's because I am so tired I vomited.
Sunday: I'm not getting out of this bed tomorrow. Let them fire me. I think I will just will myself into a coma. That will be nice.4 -
Things I imagine when talking to the client
1. Setting his tie on fire
2. My boss kissing him on his forehead as he explains the go live strategy
3. Him bending over and picking up a quarter stuck to the ground and then getting run over by a grandma on her mobility scooter3 -
everyone was doing clients.. so it was my turn.
watchRant is out!!!
devRant client for your watch, for the ones who need a higher dose of devRant!
Features: rant feed (top/recent), rant, comments, profile (about/.../avatar/rants), download images
Github: https://github.com/joewilliams007/...
Works with wear-os minSdk 28
(apk available on github, can be sideloaded by using easy fire tools android app, or built by urself)
21 -
I just spent 3hours trying to make the simplest, barely 10lines python script work with no success.
I'm writing this rant from my bed where I gave up.
I love programming but moments like this I fear I'm not cut out for it and It hurts, the little self esteem I have left is on fire.10 -
Work: there is little work for our freelancer we're getting rid of him at the end of the year
Me: are you sure, that will put a lot of work on my schedule.
Work: I'm sure you can handle it
*two weeks later*
Work: have you finished feature xyz yet
Me: nope had a server crash today so pushed it back
Work: why didn't you get "free lancers name here" to do it for you
Me: I could of if you didn't fire him, he could of also done the other features you want too
Work: ah ok1 -
Windows servers are a joke. A bad joke.
I feel sorry for people who have to work on them and have that as their profession you never used Linux
If someone came up to me and said we should use a windows server for this I'd laugh in his face and fire him. Seriously. I would.
That's how much I hate them. Got it? Ok good ... I'm calm now 😎
65 -
When you are listening to music while coding and the music is on fire so you hit the same button on the keyboard several times to go with the beat 😂1
-
Real-time physics calculation of +250000 blocks on AMD Athlon.
No worries boys, I had fire extinguisher.4 -
At my first big boy job at a start up with only 50 users, we noticed we had cloud cost spikes about 20x larger than we were expecting. I remember spending all night debugging it, checking the requests as they go through.
The culprit? Someone left an async on a UseEffect with a variable that was regularly updated as a parameter.
In other words: every time a request was fired, the variable would change… so the function would sense the variable changed and fire it again, and so on.
Felt like a total hero. -
me : Why are fire trucks red?
Bot : Because they have eight wheels and four people on them, and four plus eight is twelve, and there are twelve inches in a foot, and one foot is a ruler, and Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, and Queen Elizabeth was also a ship, and the ship sailed the seas, and in the seas are fish, and fish have fins, and the Finns fought the Russians, and the Russians are red, and fire trucks are always "russian" around.(according to the Monty Pythonesque application of the principles of logic and etymology)
😳😳😳6 -
Me: I don't know why people hate CSS so much. It works fine for me 😑
Inner me: Liar, Liar, Pants on fire 🔥 😂7 -
!rant
Just had my coworker to notice me, that there is a fire alarm right now.
Man I must say, good Job Sennheiser on Their NC headphones!7 -
I HATE SVN! >:v v:< >:v v:< :@
I used to use git for my personal code repositories and for my work. In the office I moved on, they use Subversion. I’ve been using it for months, but it’s a pain in the ass :/
We use TortoiseSVN to pull code repositories, and the AnhkSVN for Visual Studio Plugin. It works fine until two or more of us have to work at the same code project at the same time.
Last week we had a very VERY urgent code to release. We had 4 days to finish it (from thursday to sunday, tests included). We had few changes to do, but the problem was that, when one dev commited something, my changes disappeared, and viceversa. The worst part was that my partners and I had to re-work a lot of bugs that we had already fixed! >:v
This is not the first time this happens :/
The worst thing is that we cannot change our repository system because we don’t have time :(
Is there any advice you, SVN users, can give us?
9 -
Me: I need an SSL certificate.
Support: No problem. Just fire up your command line and generate one via OpenSSL.
Me: I'm on Windows.
Support: Ok, so what you do is code a Linux command line from scratch that will run in Powershell. Next, compile OpenSSL from your favorite of 60,000 versions available. Now, just fire it up and you're all set.
Me: Goodbye everything I've ever enjoyed doing in my free time.16 -
Headphones on when you sneeze. Do you assume someone said bless you and fire off a thank you, or assume no one said it and risk being the guy that doesn't thank a bless you?7
-
I took this contract and made the suggestion that we backup to the cloud and create a private repo on GIT. Client said no, local should be fine, they don't want someone stealing their code. I said okay fine.
AC just went out in the server room and they apparently had a leak from the AC to the power supply which they happened to put on top of the rack servers and switches. I'm surprised that place didn't catch fire, might be to early to call it.
All this on a Friday and we were 2 weeks away from launch party.
Not my fault, I clearly said we backup to cloud and use GIT on private repo.3 -
So we've been on our Christmas holidays/vacation and decided to spend New year's eve at my place barbecuing.
Yes needless to say that we got somewhat intoxicated, had steak etc and then fucking fell asleep on the floor outside.
In -3 C°.
Woke up like 20 minutes later according to my friends.
Decided to continue barbecuing but since the fire turned into half dead embers I decided to fucking chop up some wooden planks laying around.
Short recap.
New year's Eve.
Barbecuing.
Intoxication.
Fell asleep.
Woke up.
Chopped up planks in the dead of night.
Continued barbecuing afterwards.
Fire ablaze again, roasted the remainder of the meat and since it was too boring for me I decided to pour fucking Korn, (German alcohol) over the flames.
Needless to say my arm hairs burnt off.
Friend comes out, sees me, fucking dies of laughter.
All promised to stfu about it.
Anyway the flamed steak and stuff were still delicious.7 -
I worked for a company who supplied CERN with some ultra high end equipment.
At one point the guys at CERN email me "Problem, check this out."
The picture was of some burnt out ultra expensive cards that fit into a larger chassis... the cards looked like they had been exposed to a fire that was located exactly between the cards, but none of the cards themselves looked like they had been on fire. The chips and such looked burnt, but more so exposed to a very hot fire, not like they were on fire themselves.
It was weird. I sent them some crates to securely ship them to our QA folks, and ordered them up about $500k in replacement equipment.
QA later said they never got the equipment, someone "from another department" picked them up from the dock. And CERN never asked about what QA found, that was weird because they always asked.4 -
When some born-in-the-90s chode claims that linux is bullshit because you might sometimes have to use the keyboard on the command line, I set that motherfucker's house on fire.4
-
The increasing number of people with pronouns in their profiles at my job is really annoying. I don’t know you and I am not participating in your delusions with you. If the company makes it mandatory, I will refuse and force them to fire me over it. I cannot work effectively at a company that has hallucinating employees with no grasp on objective reality. There’s no way to know whether decisions are based on solid objectivity and data or just how someone “feels”.81
-
So I'm sitting on the toilet in my work, wondering how much time is left till I beat the specific impulse of a Raptor engine, and all of sudden the emergency allarms go off.
Weighting my options now: die in a fire or some kind of explosion, or go downstairs without ending *the thing*.
Dying Lannister-way or going out of the building and meeting my colleagues, with a very weird smile on my face.
...
I think I just discovered new levels of fast when it comes to using toilet paper.3 -
Yeah, sure Fortune. Please tell me more about my personal finances that you know nothing about.
The longer this drags on the more it feels like a war against the proletariat.
I also feel like the aristocracy is building a terrible financial charade that will be the toast of the town by November. They REALLY want to make sure the labor doesn't see any rise in wages. Can't have those peons thinking they can get ahead, right?
It's going to be the best sales pre-thanksgiving! It's going to be so popular one would say it's going to be on sale on fire, or is it a fire sale?
When November rolls around, I am Jack's complete lack of surprise.
15 -
Whatsapp: "How about you update your browser?"
How about you fire your whole fucking team of genetically engineered super-retards, that is making whatsapp shittier with ever recently rotten braincell you guys claim to have, and just let me use your shitty spyware I need to use for the time being. Fucking hell don't you even dare pulling that bullshit excuse on me when my browser is based on chromium Aka the fucking same browser engine that is powering google chrome. Just for once stop playing along with google, take your update and put it where the sun doesn't shine, you data-whoring deadshits.
9 -
We share a fate, trapped on a page by the author of our world’s demise. In your eyes I see the pain, your targets slain, I will be the whispers in your mind, the demon inside.
Don’t let down your guard, let in the darkness. You will defeat this trial of ancient gods. Take me in spirit, demon adherent. When you’re the last one to survive. Spirit, stay gentle, next monumental. Will you keep the fire alive?
I, with the power inside, set an end to these lies from the deep and the quiet. Sleep, my old enemy, let an end come to me. traveler please let me fade.10 -
Being railroaded by a colleague and accused of project sabotage, then having to submit to a 2 hour interrogation where I was literally sat in a corner and read a riot act. I had done nothing of which I was being accused. I sic'ed HR on them in a followup meeting but all HR did was sit and listen and then find in their favor despite the written evidence because my manager outranked the HR manager. That was when I learned that employees are always wrong when the manager wants them to be. I freelance now. No manager, and I can fire my clients.
-
Everything's urgent until every thing is urgent ... Or in my company's case, everything is "super dupa mega deathly critical urgent" in an attempt to out-urgent the other requests 🤦🏼♂️
Quote taken from an actual email this week and made me chuckle 😂
These are usually the same people that will send a teams message or direct email rather than using the established ticket system so hey, double rant :v12 -
Started development on a Firefox addon again:
Adding an onclick HTML tag/property (however you call that) - doesn't fire at all.
Adding an event listener - says no elements with the class I'm using (checked, it's correct) exist, doesn't fire.
Well, fucking great 😐4 -
Been sick since Wednesday with a heavy feeling of dizziness and vertigo (BPPV). Basically I got sick in the week I intentionally planned nothing to tackle my workload and get some stuff done, but I was physically unable to work on it until now.
Meeting is on Monday.
Also preorder my new book on O'Reilly, much appreciated.
(No, I am not panicking, pls send help)
3 -
Just spent the entire day of which should have been the start of vacation fighting off a second wave of ransomware on one of our production servers. Gandcrab 5.2 anyone?
Turns out an exploit in our MySQL daemon allowed some fucking Chinese hackermonkey to upload a trojan and remote execute it. Thousands of angry customers, me the only one available and able to fix shit and patch up firewalls and system.
And now I get the pleasure of working on what I should have been doing today, another fire that MUST be put out today.
Fuck you deadlines. Fuck you Chinese hackers. In fact, FML.3 -
So, driving, my car on fire, under the dashboard of the passenger side a lot of smoke. No panic, I'm 1337 h4x0r so I did what a decade of experience thought me: I've putted it off and on again. Guess what; fire gone.
Note: Hope car doesn't die on me, I just invested 2k into it23 -
When someone is so used to being told no that they argue with you for 20 minutes when you agree with them.
-
So my company was building a software to allow users to use a screen without the screen being touch itself.
It was made using a camera above the screen and then with openCV detect where the hand was.
Anyway I had to test it on the place.
And the place was a factory where they did produce pipes.
It's the biggest company in my city, and yet I was there, in the break room, coding a raspberry in winter in a factory.
The only source of heat was the fire used to melt the metal
That was literally awesome2 -
So yesterday i solved 7 tickets on my own for this project while the teammate was "testing".
Solved nothing and checked fb or new everytime i took a look at his screen.
Can comeone please fire this guy?1 -
Me: Hey, guys, this stuff is seriously flammable. Like, I’m surprised it hasn’t caught fire yet. I really want to clean it up. Here’s how I’d make it better.
Management: No. It’s fine, it works. Don’t touch it. It’s getting replaced anyway. Just add the things on top like we asked you to, and call it a day.
Me: Are you sure? This is seriously going to be a problem.
Management: We just said it’s getting replaced. Don’t. touch. anything. OK?
Me: alright.
… Eight weeks later …
Management: so this thing caught fire over the weekend, and the fire spread to other areas. We’re doing some emergency cleanup. The new guy looked at it and figured out why, and has some great ideas on fixing it, so give him some well-deserved praise!
Me: Hey! I told you about this months ago!
Management: Yes. I tuned out during today’s firefighting meetings. But it’s important to strike a balance in everyone’s style. Do you have any other concerns?10 -
The company I work for insists on having windows on every work laptop although the work I do doesn't require windows. I bought a new hdd, replaced the old one and installed gentoo. Not sure if they could fire me if they found out, however my productivity increased from the first day on.15
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Prior post on this story: https://devrant.com/rants/1635258/...
Apparently my dad decided to adopt the Windows file system hierarchy for his business.
He has managed to store his video, picture, and music folder INSIDE the DOCUMENTS folder. And there are seperate video, picture, and music folders outside of this folder. The business information is in all of these folders adding up to about 600GB of data in 10 different folders and 4 trees. Nothing has been deleted since 2010. WHAT IN THE EVER LOVING CHRIST ON A FUCKING POGO-STICK IS THIS ABOMINATION. I AM GOING TO JUMP OFF A CLIFF NAKED AND ON FIRE BEFORE I TRY TO SORT THIS SHIT.
13 -
Today I had what might have been my worst job interview to date. It had many different technical, cultural, and business red flags. One that really stuck out to me was when I asked my interviewer why he loves his job, he went on about how great the benefits and events are. Not a single word about the work he does or his teammates. A younger me would have seen this as an opportunity to put in some hard work and contribute to something great. Older me knows to avoid this dumpster fire like the goddamn plague.6
-
Pro tip: Don't cheap out on dongles for newer macbook models.. Bought a (somewhat) working Chinese dongle with 4 ports. Fire hazard and I think my 13" mbp just farted a fireball4
-
Audacity repository being on fire for the new privacy policy is something I just can't stop watching ... I love it.12
-
Buuuuullshiiiiiiit.
(Sorry for the picture of a screen, can't take screenshots when updating I think)
16 -
The reporting department had a freak out because they couldn’t print to PDFs. Whole reporting nightmare and on fire.
Turns out it was printer unplugged a thousand miles away where someone fifteen years ago put a check in to ensure that a specific printer was connected before allowing physical print jobs.
3 -
Employers and clients think developers come up with genius solutions while in offices, hell no!
Most of the genius solutions come when a Dev is showering, gaming, peeing, pooping etc. So don't fire me cause I am playing Dota 2 on my laptop. Am innovating bit*h7 -
Because my steam library keeps growing recently, how about you grow yours too And not feel bad about spending your money.
fanatical games has joined in on the Aussie Bushfire Appeal and will be donating proceeds to the WWF to help our toasted wildlife.
https://fanatical.com/en/blog/...
Games that are part of the sale:
- Skullgirls 2nd Encore
- RiME
- Doom
- Dishonoured 2
- Prey
- Wolfenstein 2
- Brothers - A Tale of Two Sons
- Wreckfest
- Learn Japanese to Survive! Trilogy
- Train Valley 2
- Everspace Ultimate Edition
- Mr. Shifty
3 -
So apparently the CIO knows all about my team lead sucking it up as a boss, and is letting him do it. He's constantly on the team leads ass about stuff and it's stressing him out.
The CIO wants him to stop being so micro managey and let the team handle things... But instead of telling the team lead that, he'd rather just blast him constantly and stress him out which makes it roll onto us and stress the whole team out.
I wish the CIO would just tell him to square up or just fire him... This stress isn't good for anyone. -
Estimate for writing a custom WordPress plugin:
1 hour - Learn the API the plugin will support
1 hour - Review how plugins are written
60 hours - Set up XAMPP only to find that the version with PHP 7 no longer supports MySQL but something called MariaDB which my host doesn't support and then uninstall XAMPP and install MAMP only to get really frustrated setting it up and beat myself for not just buying that $99 Windows Pro upgrade so I can install Kalabox with HyperV which is much easier than all of this and why doesn't Kalabox have a way of supporting Windows Home because not everyone buys Windows Pro or can afford a Mac or has time to screw around with 100 possible Linux distros to figure out which one will work best and then buy gasoline and matches and set it on fire and watch it all buuuuuuurn such pretty fire.8 -
I love how clients can ignore missing menu in their existing project, pages not updating because of fucked up cache, having three different versions of jquery and half of the code being spaghetti on fire - but they get anally retentive about margins not looking like on the wireframes on the new project.7
-
A client of ours renewed their SSL certificates without prior notice.
The app we developed for them uses SSL pinning.
The app does not include the new certificates.
The entire userbase is hereby locked out of the app.
Fun times ahead 🙃1 -
When there is a fire alarm where I work, someone has to go print out the door access logs so we have a list of who is (theoretically) on site and make sure no one is still inside. The printer is half way across the building. And breaks down at least once a day.
We are all going to die.5 -
Dev trend I think will pass?
Creating new frameworks on this dumpster fire of a language we call JavaScript.10 -
Sometimes my boss wants me to fire a bullet without a gun, they want me to throw the bullet so hard that it feels like it was shot via a gun.
Maintaining a legacy app sucks so bad when you don't even have the full codebase and some douche bag decided to just randomly throw the codebase on the fucking SVN. 😠1 -
"Alright everyone, we can't keep this up. Every day our builds are breaking because of test failures."
"We could just be more diligent devs and actually write/update tests based on new behavior we introduce to the system?"
"What? No! We're just going to get rid of all tests!"
a few days later
"Guys!!! Everything's on fire now! How didn't we catch these huge breaking changes!"
https://media3.giphy.com/media/...2 -
Lotus Notes is absolutely the worst platform known to man. Every time a ticket comes in I want to set the Domino servers on fire.11
-
load average: 348.58, 293.64, 179.93
Um, wat?
1) What are you doing little server?!
2) How could you possibly find the time to tell me that?!2 -
First time trying uncomplicated firewall (ufw) on Linux
Why did no one ever tell me configuring a fire wall was this easy1 -
Been asked if we can make a few "minor tweaks" to a Visual Basic 6.0 application last worked on in 2013.
I haven't coded in Visual Basic in approximately 20 years, the project can't be opened in Visual Studio 2012 or above and the code I've seen is a dumpster fire.
Please send help.4 -
Sometimes your music app knows just the right song to play.
Story:
Production program was working (has been for a long time). But suddenly it starts failing. I spent a long ass time trying to see what went wrong.
Problem:
Security update on the server 🙃
Now I've got the client, his minions, and the users emailing me to fix this. But I didn't start this fire!
Song: We didn't start the fire, by Billy Joel -
I am sad, I am not getting paid for last month's work as it was some "mis-communication" and my contract was available till August! 2 options
> set opacity of the website in such a manner it partially shows anything
> set the website on fire9 -
Supervisor: YOU NEED TO INCREASE THE COVERAGE OF YOUR UNIT TESTS! THE FILE logger.js DOESN'T HAVE >80% COVERAGE! IMAGINE PICKING THIS UP 6 MONTHS FROM NOW!
Bro. It's a Winston instance.
I am literally exporting a fucking Winston instance with 0 custom logic.
If 6 months from now I take a file and can't understand a Winston instance anymore, you're well within your right to fire me on the spot.2 -
Remote work sucks! Honestly almost everyone that doesn't work remotely thinks it'll be nice to work remotely. Though there are advantages like doing whatever the fuck you want to and working however the fuck you want to work. (only thing is you just can't attend meetings without a shirt on). But nope, it gets boring and lonely. When you lose motivation there's no one to fire you up. Burnouts will hit you more than it should if you work onsite. My first and second jobs are fully remote, and I'm sick and tired of this shit. Hopefully the third would be onsite.8
-
Random rant: You should always look for a new job, even after landing a good(seemingly) one. It keeps you on edge and synchronized with the market.
Employers also should not shun people who are looking for new job, if they somehow find out. A developer who looks for a job, gets offer but decide to stay is better than who lost his/her/xir fire.3 -
This is a message to all “yes man” developers:
Yeah… we just got in that the client has new requirements for you to complete by EOD:
1. Go to the gas station
2. Buy two gallons of gasoline
3. Order two 2 ft long dildos online
4. Go to the center of your town
5. Scream “fuck me corporate daddy, I’ll do anything for you” 100 times
6. Shove one dildo into ur ass and one in your mouth
7. Pour gasoline all over yourself
8. Light yourself on fire
9. Contemplate what little self respect you have for yourself and the rest of the world…8 -
IHateForALiving: I created a trigger on the model, every time you perform a save it should fire an event. You're calling the same methods I am, and the trigger is NOT firing. Are you sure we are running in the same process?
TheTeamLeader: I'm manually starting this whole piece of code in your same process, there must be something wrong on your side if it's not working
90 minutes of debugging later
TheTeamLeader: there's the thing! Your hooks are registered in a separate process, of course they are not firing
IHateForALiving:
1 -
What a difference being in the right frame of mind makes.
On Monday I had an interview for a role that I was really keen on, I'd completed a codility test before which I had killed, everything seemed in place. Then I didn't sleep well, had an urgent fire fighting call with my current employer 15 minutes before the interview, I just couldn't focus, I stumbled on some very basic questions, the whole process was torturous.
Today I had an interview for a different, but equally attractive, role. What a difference, I was focused, my answers were clear and thought out, the technical questions were fine, I killed it I think. Pma definitely makes a big difference.1 -
I've had a phone's charging port melt on me, a charger just give up and barely give any current, and now my charger overheated and almost caught on fire and my room smells like burnt plastic... I have great luck with charging phones4
-
Before you fire me and delete me as admin from managing your website, also be sure to check on and have me transfer to you the third-party stuff, like Cloudflare or Mailchimp. Remember how I had to set these up on my own on your behalf (because you don't know what you're doing and those alerts would disappear into your unmanaged inbox)? Think first to make sure you have full control over your WHOLE site. You see, what happens when I delete those accounts is no longer my problem once I walk out the door.8
-
Finally after an year I found an inspiration. Time to bring back the fire. Time to start the work.
Will keep on updating about the progress.1 -
Gag SO, tie em up & suspend them in the air in the basement or attic..
Helps if SO is into BDSM..if not it's a bit awkward.. // joke, I don't even have an attic or basement.. :(
In all seriousnes, if anyone knows how to prevent people from knocking on the office door to ask if I want coffe or sth to eat, that'd be great..asking them to not disturb unless the house is on fire or they cut off their fingers clearly doesn't help.. :(8 -
One of two ways.
1. Alot of opensource companies will startup hiring developers based on what contributions they provide
2. The current companies will fire most of the devs to exploit free work from opensource devs offering pennies as bug bounties while only keeping very few maintainers. -
Fake sticker story time. It is fucking on fire. Then I press npm install twice. Forgot node modules in gitignore. Then got push to production served by Jenkins. Now get the fuck out of here.
1 -
Toughest part of dev interviews? There are multiple I can think of.
Getting an interview altogether in this dumpster fire of an economy.
Negotiating salary (i.e. prevent getting a low-ball offer)
When the interviewer is a dev themselves and they get on a power trip and ask you the toughest/trickiest questions.
Convincing the interviewer that something you don't know now can be learned later just by googling and tinkering around.
Trying not to burst out in anger when you get asked stupid questions like "Why aren't you married?"9 -
Actual Shower thought about showers.
Every shower has 2 “parameters”: Throughput and Intensity.
When the intensity is high and the throughput is high, you feel like you are being hosed down by the fire brigade.
If the intensity is low and the throughput is high, it feels like you’re standing in the rain.
When the intensity is low and the throughput is low, you get mist/fog.
If the intensity is high and the throughput is low you’re just being fucking pissed on.
Somewhere in between is the sweet spot imo.7 -
WFH!! // worst
I've been social distancing myself from everyone, I don't even know how to properly function amongst people anymore o.O
I have a meeting at the office today, I'm so anxious as if I'm applying for a job there..in a field I've never worked on..flying there with a choper for the first time, me flying it of course.. naked & already on fire o.O Oh & I'm also wearing sweatpants as nothing else fits anymore..yaaaay.... Can't wait.. :/4 -
A "partner" company has created a "REST" API we use on an online shop we developed to send all shop-related requests to.
At least once a month, something fails on their end and the customer calls us every time, expecting that we did something wrong, but it has never been us.
These "partners" do exactly zero testing, are extremely slow in solving API bugs, have almost no logging and have no monitoring on the API at all.
Today at noon, suddenly no customers were able to order anything anymore for 4 hours.
How the fuck can you run a business so unbelievably brainless that this keeps repeating monthly?
Time they fire all their "devs" and everyone in charge of the company and operations. TERMINATE.13 -
I want to light this project on fire and walk away. Nothing is making any bloody sense.
According to specs, It’s updating a google wallet object via api, but isn’t generating the data to send along, despite every possible code path hitting that first. It also apparently isn’t calling any of the methods along the way. Obviously this is false, but that’s what the specs are reporting.
It’s also updating the object when nothing has changed. That might be, but shouldn’t, because I can see it calling the `should_update?` method which returns false, and it nopes out after that. so wth.
I’m so ready to never see this craziness ever again.
wtb kerosene or Greek fire pot, good price, pst. open to trade5 -
Apple iPhone batteries catch on fire yesterday and today at two different Apple Stores
*Scrolling news on OP5T and laughing *7 -
Achievement of the day:
Reverted a merge from 3 weeks ago (about 30-40 commits back), 1000 ish LOC. Didnt break the build, app worked 100%.
Can't shake the feeling my desk will literally be on fire tomorrow tho. -
We had a thunder storm with pretty strong winds while I was at work. A transformer across the street blew up (came off the pole, lots of fire, pretty neat)... I had a meeting at 4:30 and was told we were still having it even without power or internet. the meeting organizer never showed up.
...I could have gone home and worked because our vpn and dev servers are on another state that still had power. -
20 minutes for a 1GB update.
It's getting tiresome and an inconvenience to switch on an Xbox for a quick game.
I have installed entire Operating Systems quicker.than these updates take to complete.
Consoles used to be convenient to fire up and play, that was a lot of the appeal.
And are controllers getting heavier?38 -
Not sure if it's my first encounter, but definitely the most memorable, when I was young we had a windows xp pc (quite new at the time) and we had a program called Nero burn (used to burn images to cd's)
The pictogram of neo burn was a pc on fire, and so I thought for the duration of my xp time that that program would blow up the pc if I ever started it... -
FireFox was a Fox that was on Fire.
Safari was a compass that got lost in the Jungle.
Chrome got eaten by the Chrome looking Android Eater.
And Internet Explorer was Dora the Explorer who got lost and got swiped by the Firey Fox who lost his compass who wasn't friends with the Chrome Android guy.4 -
Ugh power's out.
Luckily it's pretty warm out so we're not suffering. I'd normally have a fire going but my fireplace is out of order.
I hauled in my portable generator in the hopes that if I was well prepared the power would come back on and it would have been wasted effort but I may end up running it later to cool down the refrigerator and maybe charge a few batteries.
Hopefully I have power by morning or I'll have a hard time getting our services deployed...4 -
Ds (dipshits) keep calling my phone 6-8 times a day. Almost all automated calls.
One day AI will handle these robocallers automatically. And then it will just be GAN style robocallers vs robosecretaries training against each other to become better and better at fooling each other.
And then suddenly, one day: skynet.
With a neutral female voice.
Or maybe an Indian accent.
"Hel. Lol. m I k r O s o t tech surprott. We detect virus on ur peesee. You will be assimilated. Where joon connor?"
Like a possessed speak-n-spell melting to death in a dumpster fire.
And we'll have done it to ourselves.6 -
Don't freaking urgent request me! Your ass better be literally on fire, otherwise you are wasting my time!2
-
Hm.
Was very frustrated from work.
Started cooking.
Simple gnocchis with tomato / paprika sauce.
Might have been a little distracted...
I've grabbed a regular sized spoon instead of a tea spoon.
I've handmade ungarian puszta.
I've added a full spoon of it to the sauce.
It's very spicy and hot.
I'll guess my guts are in hell mode for the next days.
But it's delicious.
Remember kids: always eat up what you cooked.
Even if it seems to kill you by burning your insides out.13 -
Any IDE that doesn't go to the end of line when you press the down arrow key on the last line of the file, should be burned with hell fire.2
-
Boss fast tracked a release for a customer. No testing. Not checking commits or the state. Undocumented requirement brings down everything and everyone is running around with their hair on fire. Sigh.2
-
Sometimes I wish I could just print out Ubuntu byte by byte onto a paper and then throw it into a fire to just watch it burn... ....🤔.... .....hold on!.... ....waaaait a moment.... can I just literally do "dd if=/dev/sda | lp" ?!! 😈 ...brb1
-
I find it so weird when I install Linux on my hardware it runs perfectly. But when ever my friends try on their hardware, they somehow start a fire.1
-
I'm coding like it's Mad Max and stackoverflow is the junkyard, I just hope it doesn't catch on fire. 🤡3
-
A weird one..
I spend a few hours every day simply walking in the nature. I'd like to use that time for coding. However it's easier to light fire under the sea than write code on a phone :)
then there are tablets. Not powerful enough for compilation nor does it have powerful IDEs, but it could be quite handy to vnc to a decent computer and do the stuff-stuff :) but tapping a screen ain't something pleasant. A physical kbd would be much nicer
So before I purchase a tablet with sim slot - are there any other, more suitable solutions?9 -
On the week I went on holiday there was a fire alarm in our data center and the Halon fire suppression system was deployed.
I always miss the excitement.
Apparently our servers rolled over perfectly and we had less than 5 min downtime though, even with 4 killed drives in our SAN. So that's a win.
Kudos to our system administration team, especially the poor bastard who was sat in the data center with his toddler at fuck-my-life-o'clock in the morning.1 -
-Rant-
How do you (not) secure your Rest based web service?
1. Chain it to shady organic authentication system built by a hoard of monkeys high on Tequila.
2. have secret keys that get copy pasted into config flat files, and index them on your code search engine.
3. make the onboarding extremely platform specific that you need 500 environment variables, 50 scripts, 5 fancy device presses and a tap dance to make a GET call to the service.
4. fish through 500 rotating log files that the authentication system generates for each API call made.
5. Leave traces all over the host so if you have to start over, you should sudo rm -rf / and set fire to your computer. -
One thing my dev years have showed me through various systems:
The world is held together by masses of scripts. And most of them are horribly bad, unmaintainable, extremely complex and usually not replaced on requirement changes, but extended by other terrible scripts to get the desired behaviour.
Windows is based on tons of shitty batch scripts, powershell madness, WSH bullshit and VBS absurdity.
GNU/Linux is build upon trillions of incomprehensible shell scripts, heaps of python gizmo and perl mysteries.
Every complex system I've seen uses batch or shell scripts to fire up its runtime.
And it doesn't seem to get any better, so let's face it, we're doomed.3 -
Got into this compitition of Blind Code
Idea crazy a F!!!!
Mind prepared for something challengy! What I get? Greatest of 3 Nos in C... Poker Face😐
Confident a hell..With the monitor OFF, Ran down the keyboard on fire!
With the compilation result, BANG!
#include<iostream> instead of <stdio>.
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
My Mind BLINDED!7 -
Right,i consider myself a pretty damn good dev... I can back up everything I say to prove that I'm right on not lying to clients
But I see all these devs who do lie... Who withold data from clients cause it's not great.
And I go to clients and prove that they are lying not doing it right.
But I know saying to them... Oi your current devs are shit fire them ... Isn't a good way to get them as a client
Me and my company are open and honest ... we go all out on all of our projects. I work nonstop. It is seriously baffling the kind of developers are out there and how bad they can be I'm... Seriously just.... Urgh 😖
How should I go about talking to clients without going ... Fire them quick or saying that in a ... More humble respectful way...
I need more clients ... To survive and I don't mind coming across as a dick as long as they understand what's going on and that they are people ripped off by these asshole devs5 -
Plot: Senior management, "lets fire this guy asap !!!"
Twist: It's been several months and the management has not communicated, spoken or done anything to this guy.
WTF is going on here. 😕1 -
I have been a developer in one company or another for over 27+ years. Today I had to dismiss / fire / let go of a recently hired developer (a Senior by career length) on one of the teams I now manage. Basically imposter syndrome compounded with an inability to communicate a need for support (even when we reached out daily to assist).
When I had to let this person go I felt all the times when it happened to my colleagues , and to me. Like a thousand knives stabbing . It wasn’t easy.
It’s of course not easy to be dismissed . But it’s also not easy to be the one to dismiss.5 -
So, you have some coffee, make up your mind, and sit down to begin the project you need to submit the next day.
You fire up the machine and bam! Windows takes it's April update - "Do not turn off your PC", and a fucking rotation of evil dots on the screen for eternity.
And it goes on and on, on and on, till you have lost all mood for work.3 -
If you read some react tutorials, weaseled your way through the interview and think your code now is waka flocka flame, I’m gonna waka flocka fire you. Here’s an autograph for your next employer, I wrote it on a starter cap.1
-
Frontend web development is a fucking jungle. I feel like bloody Bear Grylls whenever I come out of my backend cave - shit's overwhelming, yo.2
-
The "just use the right tool for the job" argument I've seen many times in defense of Windows is getting tiresome. When the tool's handle is on fire, you use a different tool. It's madness to keep burning yourself.29
-
It has now become trend for all new startups in my country to follow these three steps.
Step 1 - Attract developers by showing them high CTC.
Step 2 - Make them work mercilessly on intern basis giving them low pay.
Step 3 - Fire them after intern period without giving some valid reasons.
I am fed up now as I have wasted my six months without getting much pay and now I am jobless 😨5 -
It's not so much that I mind all the fire-war about best languages, editors, and other shit, it's that NO ONE PROVIDES ANY GODDAMN EVIDENCE OR ARGUMENT ABOUT WHY. Come on folks, everyone here is on the higher end of the IQ curve, FFS make an argument!!10
-
Reading a 36 page article on REST for a course on OSS, and I'm pretty sure the combination of background sound generators (waves, fire, singing bowl, cat purrs) is what's going to get me through this exam...
PS: Recommend http://purrli.com for all demotivated, cat-deprived devs out there.2 -
The business is prioritizing error reporting for issues we are aware of over actually fixing the bugs. Isn't that kind of like installing smoke detectors in a house that's already on fire instead of calling the fire department?1
-
If you write a blog post on how to build “some-component” and the first step in your article is to run “npm install framework-some-component”…
I hope you die in a fire. -
That rage when you reinstall Ubuntu MATE on its partition, and it decides to nuke your Windows partition instead, with all the files you had on it too.
FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
HOW HARD CAN IT FUCKING BE TO INSTALL YOURSELF WHERE I FUCKING TELL YOU TO? WHY THE FUCK DO YOU EVEN ASK ME WHAT TO DO, IF YOU'RE GONNA HAVE A MIND OF YOUR OWN ANYWAY?
DIE IN A FIRE5 -
Hello world,
at my current job at a "big company" our development process sucks, something is on fire at all times, there are hundreds of dependency issues, it's so bad that I'm struggling to find motivation.
Yet they pay me well.. Yaay for big companies that refuse to change when provided with feedback on how to improve things.4 -
Just finished a app for mapping printers based purely on convention in a Citrix environment, no manual config needed. Chief of operations said "it's fixing stuff like this that should trigger a bonus, too bad we're the government". (Yay, thanks for rubbing it in).
Then I responded "I'll get my reward in heaven as usual, then". CIO says: "but you're not going there...."
Guess I just need a fire extinguisher then. Thanks boss.1 -
Fuck api docs which are blatantly wrong. Wasted several hours on building an API client with pagination according to the api docs.
Turns out the actual implementation did not follow its own spec / api doc and returns values without pagination. And some objects are not objects but arrays.
I mean, next time I build an API client, I'll just fire a dozen requests on the endpoint, see what it wants and see what I get and maybe guess right what it actually does.4 -
There is that meme "I've no idea what I'm doing" and there's the meme "it's fine *in a fire*". Currently I feel like a combination of those two. I'm in unexplored waters and nobody knows what's going on anyway, so I just make sure my part is technically correct according to specifications and when everything comes together I'm ready to respond to the expected disaster..
I tried to spread awareness of the coming disaster but nobody listens so I'll just wait and see what happens..1 -
I tried to get this trainwreck of a middleware running again. Generations of imbecile devs turned this once ambitious project into a dumpster fire. I had some feeble hopes. Wrote a little framework to get this braindead architecture back on its track. BUT EVERY PULL REQUEST I GET TO REVIEW SHOWS THEY DON'T CARE. FML! Why am I even trying. I should have known these morons just want to pour gasoline onto an already blazingly burning software. GODDAMMIT SHOW SOME ENGINEERING SPIRIT. Why are you even in this industry in the first place?1
-
Worst week ever.
Servers are on fire. Respoinse times out of control
Some SIMPLE SQL queries (literaly select * from whatever where Id = id) timouts at 30 seconds.
No idea what's goining on (And I have full logs of all api calls and all DB queries). No way to find how to corelate this data.
Ok, I added 1000$/month on Azure and the problem is "masked", but not resolved.
I have dumps, I have logs I have everything, why the fuck I can't find the 1 or 2 APIs causing that ?!!!
Now I feel better.10 -
If there's something wrong in the server room
Who you gonna blame? (the intern)
If the hard drive's grilled
And it don't look good
Who you gonna blame? (the intern)
If you're seeing keys in your'r github's HEAD
Who you gonna blame? (the intern)
Your PC's on fire
and the website's dead
Who you gonna blame? (the intern)
Disclaimer: My internship was a pretty cool time actually... :) -
Holy shit! Samsung is literally on fire these days... Firstly, they release the Linux on Dex beta with Ubuntu support and now they announced the new UI for their next phones which is fucking amazing in my opinion.4
-
Hello and welcome come to hell for developers. Take a seat at any open computer.
You may have noticed we did away with the fire and brimstone.
Instead we just have you maintain the legacy code from your first job.
It's genrally html, php, javascript, and css all on the same page and all mixed together.
We would say have fun, but that's not really the point. -
Halt and Catch Fire is having another great season. Lived those days and it is so true. CompuServe, Compaq, Commodore, 5 1/4", Tandy 1000, Byte Mag, Atari, The Well... The tech you see is really 1985ish. Attention to detail is appreciated by long time technologists.
H&CF is about building a tech business and much applies to today's startups. That two brilliant tech women are leading the charge adds to it. All the characters are great Cameron, Gordon, Donna, the devs at Mutiny and Joe channeling Jobs (in my opinion) is spot on.
Any H&CF fans have an opinion?4 -
Request: My WordPress website, with over 40 plugins active, some of which do the same thing, but I want to keep them all active, because fuck logic is not loading fast enough. Please fix it!
Response: Kill it with fire and buld it from scratch. Use an optimized, custom solution, tailored to your exact needs. The time needed is the same as trying to fix your broken WordPress...
Reaction: WTF? Everybody is using WordPress, that means it's the best! Why would I build my custom website on a fast and easy to maintain custom platform, optimized for my needs? Fix my loading speed!
Response 2: *facepalm*4 -
Just finished watching "Halt and Catch Fire" on Netflix. If you haven't checked it out, you definitely should. It's about 80s tech disruptions. Also, any other suggestions for tech related TV series / movies? Silicon Valley, Mr. Robot etc.?6
-
> be me
> watching FRIENDS
> lurking internet
> get a message from the manager, "we need to deliver WordPress + woocommerce + cost calculator theme to the client".
> "but I'm, not a WordPress developer"
> ??
> "okay, I'll just find a theme for it on ThemeForest"
> *sends theme as per description*
> *reverts back with HTML5 template* "see if we can use this"
> to be honest, that template was not even close as per requirement.
> *sends another themes back and forth*
> ???
tl;dr : she finalized the theme I intially sent after half of the day
shall i just kill my self slowly with fire? -
During an interview, how to detect if a company has a dysfunctional flow of development? What good questions to ask?
Like things are scattered all over and there's no standard being followed, no architecture, no code reviews, everything is a patchy magic, no testing, and everything is just on fire! How to avoid such companies?6 -
The fires in australia killed something like half a billion animals, and it's kind of sad, all that potential barbecue going to waste.
We have the means to solve this. With KNAWWWWLEDGE.
What we do is hook up buckets to a bunch of big ass drones and have some sort of contest to see who can put out the most acreage of fire. People will come from all over for the annual "australian fire olympics."
Shit, put a $1 million dollar bounty on "most acreage put out" stream it on twitch, youtube, netflix, you name it.
Fires would be out in a day or three.12 -
Sorry guys for the lack of content on the stream last week. I'll be back with more fire than ever I promise.2
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I started as intern at the place. Worked unpaid for 4 months. Then they started paying. That's when shitload started. 5 web developers and 10 projects. 1 months later they fire one of us. Next month they fire another one. 3 developer and 8 projects. No documentation for they projects that were already started before I went there. Provide support for 3 year old project and nothing for reference. Salary was paid 10/15 days after the month war over. I couldn't take it anymore so I have a two months notice before leaving job. A month later all of the 3 android developers gave their notice. After we left, they haven't still paid us our final month's salary. Reason was it was not formal east of leaving and they projects we worked on haven't rolled out to market yet.
Talked and then mailed them the resignation two months in advance is not formal then I don't know what is.
Also how can the project be rolled out when there is specification change every 6 hour to 1 day on the project. Also we completed what was given to us and then the project hasn't rolled out because of new changes in the specification. -
Time to switch to offline and hide in some dark corner to get work done. Tired of all the IM’s and coming over to my desk from 1 person for “critical” work. If they’re all critical then none of them are truly critical. If you sit on the data for 2 months, and then today is the day it becomes critical and the compliance issue is because of your ineptitude then its a you problem not an IT problem. Then on top of that you submit your data to be loaded in the incorrect request form and spreadsheet format you can go fuck yourself asking this be done in an hour. It could be done in 15 minutes if you had it in the correct format as specified in the 20 meetings over the past year which removed all manual analysis and automated the entire process you idiot. Now I have to get it into the correct format in that hour so I don’t have to do the analysis for you.
I have other things to do besides your etl tickets, like finding the actual problems in our actual critical applications. You know the ones where the VP’s of this giant corporation start calling if they go down.
Sorry for the rambling guys. -
Why can't people pick up on the subtle cues that you are busy? If I am intently looking at my monitors then I am fucking busy! This is not the time to engage in a personal convo. Then do not slack me after that! I wish slack had an icon that conveyed 'under a deadline unless the building is on fire do not disturb'2
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Ok. The honeymoon with Windows 10 is clearly over and so the gloves are off.
About to lose my mind with both Windows and Visual Studio updates. If A+B, everything goes smoothly but on the other hand if A+B, everything goes to hell.
And when trying to add components to Visual Studio, it fails 9 times out of ten due to some goddamn /NoWeb switch. What/where the hell is this switch and why everything works without issues that one time out of ten!?
About to burn everything with fire! -
Famous quote time! I forget who said it, and the number varies a bit from one retelling to the next, but one that has always stuck in my mind since I heard it is the following:
“I’d fire any programmer who spends more than [10 | 25]% of his time coding.”
I’ve always taken this as an admonition to spend time charting out solutions before building, instead of churning out stream of consciousness spaghetti code, personally.
Any thoughts from the broader community on the topic?2 -
Ever come back from a small vacation and arrived to see that the rest of the team had butchered your baby and were trying to stitch it back together, but only succeeded in making it worse?
Feels just like that right now. Fucking hell. I gave them a linter, a prettier config file and pre-made shortcuts to run. Still looks like Dr. Frankenstein was drunk while stitching and overvolted the machine, so now the bloody monster is also on fire. This will be a fun week 🙃1 -
Need advice.
So the class I TA is learning how to use heroku for website testing. It is going up on fire because of a shit tonne of errors everywhere. The professor is adamant heroku is what is used nowadays for testing (over using FTP) so we will have to help 200+ people troubleshoot without knowing much ourselves.
My question is what are some other modern website testing mechanisms? Preferably some that have retard proofing in them.3 -
Start a business, it'll be fun they said. One of those days you'll realise that you're in a situation where you'll have to fire a friend from your engineering team, there's no way around it..
People keep on thinking and saying
"You're so lucky, you can choose the clients and the team, and work whenever you want to.."
Yep. Highest highs and lowest lows go hand in hand. Thank god there's both.2 -
Stay safe all my other Aussie Dev friends currently getting pelted with all the storms in the east...
(Yes we are still on fire for anyone who isn't Aussie)13 -
[Question]
If there is an fire, smoke starts to fill the room quickly, and you are working on your code, will you "git commit / git push"?3 -
Look, extra remote team member. If I hired you with the express requirement that you work and/or live in sync with my time zone, and you claim to live and work in my time zone for a few weeks but you're lying to me and you were actually just on vacation here and have moved back overseas, you SUCK. And now we're firmly entrenched with the project and it's near impossible to fire you at this point if I don't want to deal with a whole new developer and learning curve!!!
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This mother fucking laptop is turning on by itself when put inside the bag, I was feeling the heat from the bag, I get it out and wow this mother fucker is really on fire 🔥, when I opened it I saw windows trying to repair, you windows mother fucker why are you up asshole, I put water cloth on it and throw it straight to the fridge.7
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At Rackspace there are lights on the walls that go off for things like ddos attacks, fire alarm, etc. The being a code rainbow. Meaning "evacuate the building".
Every time we deployed to prod I always joked one day that it would fail so spectacularly that it would cause a code rainbow.3 -
Thank you Google, for updating Chrome on my phone without notice in spite of me explicitly disabling automatic updates and me 'not having enough storage space left' for manual updates. It's nice to see you caring about the user so much.
Now if you sucked my dick while you were at it, that would be great.3 -
I'm torn on dev bootcamps.
On one hand, I learn the most in hands-on direct tinkering and bootcamps tend to exude this with well-trained instructors following best practices.
On the other hand, the short timeline means corners are cut and an overwhelming amount of material is dropped all at once leading to a leaky retention vessel at the end.
I prefer ramping up learning over a period of time to gain experience than a fire hose approach.1 -
And now even the meetings I am not invited to are interrupting my work flow. Seriously. I need to collaborate with two people, one of whom is the SME for the piece of code I am working in who just got back from vacation, which he left on after breaking his algorithm because apparently due dilligence is lost on this guy. My other collaborator and I have been fighting this fire for two days. And they both get whisked off into another meeting before I can get ANY information out of any of them. But sure. We're only in a day by day schedule slip. With customers depending on our delivery in order to test their project. I am not work it OT for these fuckers because they decided that having a meeting is more important than. Delivering a damn reliable product.3
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Buy dell, hp, lenovo and any other craptop company out there and fire all the numbnuts working there so that they slowly die of unemployment in the fucking gutters where their useless asses rightly belong. Oh and castrate them too so that they don't reproduce.
I'm considering going full Lannister on them but that might be too harsh.5 -
So you're working on a product that basically the main thing it does is fire off http requests and parse their responses into a nice model. We've made some nice helper class that allows you to do this easily, but a simple piece of functionality is not in there yet.
You agree to add this one simple function and decide to:
- Not conform to coding standards set by the team
- Document its behavior which does NOT match the implementation
- Not write a single fucking unit test to prove it's functionality
ARE
...
YOU
...
FUCKING
...
MAD?! -
Going from a project in fire and 60+ hours a week back down to in-between projects and 40 hours a week. For the first week I was so confused on what I should be doing. Now I realize I have time for my own projects. I bet my work like goes crazy just as soon as I get into something.
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Turn on colorful lights
Fire up some crackers
Consume sweets
Browse places with friends
Debug darkness
Reboot your inner system
😀 HAPPY DIWALI 😀
✨✨🎈🎊🎋🎑🎊🎏🎀🎁2 -
Is there anything possibly more worthless than Gimp for doing basic image edits. Damn, all I wanted to do was make the white background of an image transparent. I usually use Paint.NET (only available on a PC) for quick crops and background removals. Gimp is just...painful. Now I gotta fire up my PC and send myself the image so I can edit it there.10
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In the country, Sunday morning, gale blowing, internet off/on, coffee, warm fire: Coding day or not?
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!rant
I tend to do a lot of sketching and note taking and like to use pen on paper. But sick of tearing out notes and accumulating bits if paper that contain notes here and there. I was thinking of going digital with this specific task (for cheap) i don't own an ipad so was thinking of getting a Fire HD 8" and a Boxwave EverTouch stylus. Im all Apple so don't know android, would this hardware do the trick and what would be a decent note taking and organising app for it? Appreciate any advice comments. Other uses for it are irrelevant.5 -
I am using Dell Insipiron 7567.
I have dual booted my rig with Ubuntu 18.04 and Windows 10.
Right from the start itself I couldn't get to the screen of trying or installing with default settings. I had to use 'nomodeset' with 'quiet splash'.
Even after installing I had problems. After some hours of searching I found out that installing Nvidia 390 driver would remove the bug. It did. But my rig heats like shit. And throttles very much. Where as I am not using anything other than
1.chrome
2.vscode
3.terminal
Which i think is very normal?
And looor of battery drain.
I used to get around 3-5 hrs of battery life in Ubuntu Gnome 16.04 but now its like max 2 hrs.
Which is bad I guess.
I switched back to "X.Org X server" driver with "nomodeset" (without nomoseset it will load upto login page. Once i hit enter it gets stuck) it boots up but can't change the level of brighness or can't do anything related to display setting. Temperature has reduced but sacrificing on display settings.
Is there any way to remove this bug?
And additional infos
Graphics in about shows something like "llvmpipe (LMVM 6.0, 256bits)"
Guys do respond please?
17 -
Named my current project "dumpster fire" so I can say "This dumpster fire doesn't even get through compiler anymore!" will work on that level too.2
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IOS keyboard is utter garbage. IOS as a whole is utter garbage, but the keyboard is the cream of the crop of garbage.
Wasting a user's time and destroying/changing the user's input against their wishes is malicious design of the highest order and this dumpster fire excels in it.
Type something completely valid and autocomplete changes it to something that doesn't makes sense. It not only gives you a terrible suggestion half the time, it will also change previous parts of the sentence that it somehow allowed you to keep. If you reject its suggestion, it deletes your current word and previous word(s), instead of restoring it to what it was before it made the terrible suggestion, like every other keyboard does.
Need to go back and adjust your sentence? If you tap it will hijack the cursor and highlight the nearest word it doesn't like instead of moving the cursor where you touch. If you accidentally hit a character on the cramped and unusable keyboard, congrats, you get to type the word again.
I know about hold space to drag the cursor.
I don't want Apple to decide for me that I actually wanted to go to the closest word it doesn't like, or the current word, or the next word based on a dice roll. I want the cursor to go where I tap. Like literally every other input device functions.
Want readily accessible numbers and punctuation? lol no
I know there's gboard, but compared to Android it's also almost unusable. This leads me to believe the keyboard is little more than a skin over the IOS keyboard engine, like Safari, another IOS dumpster fire. But, it is slightly better than the stock keyboard, which isn't saying much.
I yearn, minute by minute, for the time I can ditch this dumpster fire for a real phone.11 -
Being a zoomer means leaving your favorite indie musician on repeat overnight for them to earn a bit more money.
Being a zoomer means never leaving a one-star review on your Uber driver because if you do this, they fire them, put them on an internal blacklist that is unofficially shared between such bloody companies and they'll never find a job and probably die of starvation.9 -
My wife is a pretty decent artist and we were talking about AI and what affect it can have on folks in the graphic artists industry.
I fire up Microsoft's Designer, enter a prompt and this is what it generated.
She said "Oh good. We're gonna be OK."
2 -
Fire every single teacher who runs from self education. Someone who keeps themselves up to date should be keeping students up to date.
Secondly, assign each class a major project which starts from 4th semester with one of the faculty acting as the Project Manager. Allow each student to choose their area of interest and work on that module. This will help develop team work and teach how not to rm rf production server or db:drop production database ^.^ -
!Rant (but for those few who keep on giving me upvotes)
First workout done today. How did it go? Really well. In fact, it went so well that I couldn't open the repurposed fire door (thick, heavy metal). -
I think I need serious help because for like 2 weeks now i have been feeling so demotivated to code (and peoples project are with me). At times i feel like just doing some unproductive sh*t like watch stupid videos on youtube. I seriously don't know wtf is wrong with me. The way i felt when I started my journey in coding that fire, is no longer burning in me 😭😢4
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Me: HM let's fire up my old pirate game prototype and see if I can do anything with it before sea of thieves comes out and everyone says I'm copying...
*Turns on Xbox and goes to store*
Me: ah fuck! -
Fucking MQTT, go suck some dicks! Can't get that pice of shit to work, sending connect and publish works like a charm but somehow I won't get an acknowledge message which means the publish doesn't go through!
On the brigt side: another oportunity to fire up wireshark and compare my software to other tools.
Anyone expirienced wit MQTT or thingstream.io
P.s. there support also can go and choke on some dicks!5 -
Fire at work place.
Normal People: Immediately run from the gate.
Programmer: Git add, Git commit, Git Push, realize fire on the gate, jump from the window.1 -
Well, it's been a few shitty and dark days... Somehow this made me smile a bit
https://neowin.net/news/...1 -
Got this from an online crane game (there's another pic, retracted)... anyone else see this and think of @SidTheITGuy ?
Side note: typing his handle is kinda shaking... i mean if hes considered IT... if the small amount of us old school and/or real tech people even got -40% from a meteor or something...the world is doomed... i highly doubt the sids of the world could start a fire, know basic irl skills... or simple electronics even. o.O
...wait, is this what kids are referring to as "woke"... im still fuzzy on that...so are they, ive asked several-- conflicting definitions.
44 -
By the end of the day my eyes always feel like they are on fire.
After four years of this it is time to get some blue light filtering computer glasses.6 -
Should I quit or let them fire me?
I am working on startup since 4 months as mid level ML engineer and my employer called me to say that they might fire me because my performance is not okay. He was true that my performance is far from good because I am busy preparing documents for my MSc. I am thinking about quitting but at the same time, pandemic is hitting hard and lots of jobs are lost and I might be unemployed after this.6 -
How I know I need coffee?
(1) fire up "npm run webpack-dev"
(2) Debug webpack config settings for 30 minutes wondering why it can't rebuild scripts
(3) Realize you ran it on the ~/projects/me/release folder and not ~/project/me/dev-latest folder. -
!Question
I see lots of rants here of bosses/clients screaming, imposing their authority, making people work during the night, weekends etc. Is it that common?
In my actual job, the few times my boss screamed to me, I was about "fuck this shit, I'll just do what he wants and go home at the right time. If they don't like it, just fire me. And laught silently when things goes wrong".
I've been afraid to get into the developer area and always be stressed out with too much work to do, people screaming and having to work on weekends.3 -
IMHO, the Amazon Fire Stick represents a "race to the bottom" for media devices in terms of interface design, functionality and app support.
They join the Apple TV waiting there since the second generation device.
Everything you could ever want to stream is either a few hundred clicks away or on a different device. -
Recently helped someone with a Spark project and encountered “reactive JS” for the first and hopefully last time. Never minded using JS but happy to admit that it’s a dumpster fire design-wise…one that Spark engineers apparently decided didn’t have quite enough petrol on it.2
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Monday morning
Get to work
Open email
Ci went crazy
Slack is on fire
Some npm modules deprecated approach
Rewrite docker files
Some other npm modules disappeared.
I hate you web technologies, I hate you developers who make releases Friday night.
I hate everything.
Ffs on the weekend just build Ikea fornitures instead of fiddling with my stack!
Sigh.2 -
Guys, i've searched long and hard for a custom Kindle fire 1st Gen ROM... Digging through the internet to find this shit is hard. The dropbox links on XDA for OtterKat aren't working.
I managed to flash Cyanogen to my other kindle (Fire HD 7) - which my dad wants back, even though he dosent use it. I'm left with this first gen, and i've been at it all day2 -
When you're getting roasted and given tasks of fixing and changing some code you didn't write trying to get a PR in, and the person you paired with who wrote it has moved on to other work.
Moreover you'll be stuck taking the blame down the road if they don't fire you, as the policy is to rebase squash merged in PR's so it will all unfortunately be under your name.1 -
Working on a web API project in C#, our frontend is another company, the body gets to them but they claim that the json is incorrectly formatted... I'm sure that it isn't but whatever...
I keep digging around to see what can be done, a "helpful" colleague offers to help, only to start asking about everything from scratch and after frustrating and distracting me like... 10 fold, I leave him to play as he wants, then hard reset and move on...
fire postman and focus on the logs... nothing! database... nothing!
couple of minutes later, I look at that far small laptop screen to find out that he has drenched my code with break points and the IDE is blinking its tabs off over there on the screen I rarely look at!
Tell me again why do we work in open spaces?!!3 -
!rant
I need opinions: Amazon Fire Stick or Google Chromecast?
I want Hulu, Netflix, Crunchy Roll, Amazon Prime TV, and WWE Network.
I welcome all opinions. Remote strength, price, ease of use, and stability are my main concerns.
I also might jail break it and/or try to develop apps for it.
Sorry if a repost but this is a random thought from an alcohol addled mind.
I would use a laptop on every tv, but cost vs benefit says no.3 -
Does anyone have a good suggestion to a (PC) game that is quick to fire up, runs in a window and offers some distraction for 5-10 minutes at a time while I wait for docker builds to complete, deployments to finish etc? Just braindead shit, like Clash of Clans on mobile for instance.9
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Last two weeks on assignment. Agreed on no more releases. What am I doing? Only releases. Stressful? Yes. Will things be on fire when I actually leave? Probably. Did I want this? No.2
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Nexus 5 almost caught fire because I vomited on it in my sleep whilst it was on charge.. my work colleagues found this Hilarious1
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Well I did a stupid thing the other day. I was so pissed at myself. I had a form on my website for people to email me and it was working fine. I was tired of the form variables staying filled out so I decided to use some Javascript to clear the values when they click the button. I didn't think about the fact that the Javascript would fire before the backend code and so I was getting blank emails. I finally figured this out and instead just gave users a button to clear the form's input fields.4
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Give me a single reason, why someone will use XML over JSON. I am trying to parse a XML file in Java and it builds a null document everytime. HELP!!5
-
My very first experience with a computer was a Mac 512Ke which my parents bought to do accounts on.
I was too young to really get it but it had the games Zork 2, a flight sim called fire fox (I think) and some painting program.
What actually got me into programming was when I was at a friend's and we were trying to get dune 2 to work and his older brother stepped in, did some command line unzip and then hey! It worked.
Bit he was such an arrogant prick about us not knowing how to start the program that I started learning myself how to use computers properly. -
Questions more then a rant...
I've moved from being a lead on imploring DevOps and Agile practices in a large Telco to now working for a security consultancy... The team I'm with are s*** hot when it comes to SecOps (which is why I changed jobs) and I've been hired to he the automation and working practice expert on the team. Already got some of them learning Ansible which is a great start!
I've got delivery now being pushed to Git and all client work being tracked in Jira and properly documented and collaborated through HipChat and other CI tools on the way....
My question is this... Does anyone have some awesome resources to teach people Git, Jira, Jenkins, etc. quickly without forking or branching out on expensive training? Focus on being a technical but consultative team. Ideally just wanna pull some awesome guides and make. My own commits on them for the team... Please fire a story or epic away!1 -
Weekend of our big re-platforming finally comes. I'm not invited for overtime work during this transition. Boss emails on Sunday wanting me to test some code.
What the actual fuck? HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Nope. Office could be on fire - not being paid? Not working. 🍺🍺🍺 -
That feeling when you realize that the REST API you were trying to consume apparently does not provide a query flag to get for a more detailed response making you think you'll need to fetch one list of items and then fire almost 1,000 requests really does not compare to that feeling when a colleague points out that the REST API in question does in fact support the flag AFTER you implemented the roundabout way.
FUCKING HELL!
I just didn't realize that I could click on GET and POST blocks for the metronome API documentation opening up a frigging pop-up. (See screenshot.)
Why couldn't the information have been more upfront? Only a cursor change on hovering the area could make one thing to click there.
Oh how I blame their lack of a user interface for my blindness.
I thought that it was just a basic documentation that only told you which endpoints exist and expects you to learn by trial of fire. So I searched the interwebs and on their support forum I found an old issue making me think that my round-about way was the way to go m(
Even worse, on the support forum I cannot even leave a comment warning the poor souls comming after me that they should not do the roundabout way as that issue has been long closed.
If you want to see it yourself: https://dcos.github.io/metronome/...
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Last night my subconscious shifts into management monologue mode imagining me and my managers in dialogues discussing all the problems that they're missing using management teens and references to the Phoenix Project, which I reminded I told them to read 4yrs ago in my first discussion after joining the team....
But basically mind was sorta on fire while half asleep?
Woke up this morning, and calm so wondering... Is this the stuff that my dreams are, except usually I don't remember anything.... -
What's up with people being super cutthroat about best coding practices? In my experience it's not very well focused on in schools or especially for self taught devs, so what's with the critical attitude towards bad formatting or indenting, or perhaps less than par code organization? I get it's suboptimal but if someone doesn't know that it's wrong then what's with the fire and brimstone response? Not personal, just something I picked up on.3
-
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK LOOPBACK. Fuck it right in the dickhole. Fuck IBM for paying the salary on this piece of shit. Fuck all of the copy pasting I have to do, fuck the fact that it never knows what fields my type will or will not have, fuck the 4 different versions of the docs they have for each version of this dumpster fire of a framework. This is the dumbest codebase I have ever worked with, and I hate every minute of it. One last fuck, it is for the guys who came before me and chose this for our companies server. Fuck you!2
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Hi my name is Kray and am an addict. I subconsciously create code with Bugs so I can later solve, I then after get a feeling of deep euphoria. It's like discovering fire albeit it's more like using matches to start one ( kgm Stack overflow.) 😅 But it's a a healthy habit in a safe environment it could be worse, I could be on narcotics... No wait I take it back I have been dabbling with JavaScript 🤦🏾♂️😂😂..2
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I'm about to give up on chrome canary on my Mac. Opens up tonnes of empty tabs (sometimes over 30) when I put the OS to sleep and fire it up later. It's slow and sometimes I have to refresh pages for the page to display correctly. Gonna go with Firefox for now.1
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Interesting NY Times article today Saturday March 26 2016 by Markoff and Lohr, "A Race to Take Control of Artificial Intelligence And the Future of Tech". Lots of C levels will read this article and ask CIO if AI on radar. Will fan the fire. Also a lot of VC action. Google TensorFlow open source. Microsoft also all in and of course IBM Watson. Google beat Go grandmaster 4-1, which is tougher than chess program. Something to keep on your radar. Have fun!
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I feel the stress in my head and a fire within cause my PRs are rejecteeed ♫
I have an error to solve and frustration to spaaaaare!
What a beautiful wind blowing through~
I wish that it blew my shaaame
And incompetencyyyy
Just fire me alreaaaadyyyyy ♫
- a song by Bugged the series on Disney Channel -
I have two questions.
Does anyone use competition as a motivator to start coding? For whatever purpose really whether it’s making a similar but better project or just because you’re in a rut and need to get out of it and that fire is pushing you to actually do something. (That last one totally wasn’t inspired by ANYTHING)
And is anyone on here French or know any French Devs?4 -
Guys, actually i am a very slow coder, in the last two weeks my progress was very less hence today while meeting my CTO told me he is very disappointed with my progress and he will speak with my boss soon to discuss about me. Do you think he will fire me because of it? Actually i am working on react native and its very new to me. I am still learning stuff about it. But the tasks are kinda overwhelming. So i am taking this much time with it.10
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Some more song ideas: the root, the root, the root is on fire... and „don‘t fear the root shell“....2
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"Everything is on fire" isn't just an expression uses by developers, its a feature used on every project!1
-
Flashed the amazon-official firmware for the KF1. great. backed up. fantastic.
now to find a rom.
fuck.
nothing on XDA is actually there; all of the download links for kindle fire 1st gen lead to 404 pages. I'm actually getting very stressed over this. if i'm being stupid and missing a working link to a compatible ROM for KF1, PLEASE tell me
thanks,
- Your pal Park -
Does anyone know a good method, or library to match 2 gps locations based on proximity to each-other?
while being fed a few 100 GPS locations per device per hour.
I currently do it by having the client send their Geohash to a database, then request all neighboring hashes around it and all other clients in those hashes, then get their GPS to check for distance.
But this does not seem to work flawlessly, it works on tests and emulators (its for phones) but on real phones it seems to be hit an miss, but no errors, the event just does not seem to fire.4 -
God damn the android camera 2 API is a giant pain in the ass. First I got it all working on my emulator, then I thought "hey let's set how it looks on my fancy phone!.... Oh... Ok."..
So at much fiddling I managed to merge the Google sample with my requirements and got it working on my phone. Then I'm sitting in the train, fire up the emulator and to my surprise IT STOPPED WORKING ON THE EMULATOR AAARRHH!
anyway, it's working on my device which will suffice for now.
Now I'm trying to chop the video into images and... Wait... Google... What do you mean your don't support the Java media framework?!?
😭😭😢😭😩😩😖😡😡😠😠😠😠 -
Guys is that the case, that it is such a hassle to work with forms in React-Redux application?! Hell, it takes a lot of time to just create a simple form with like 3 lines of inputs.
Everytime I need to setup bunch of those Actions that will fire on a field value change, than selectors to pick from the state and send to the backend with redux-saga. OMG OMG OMG.
Redux-forms kind a struggle to setup too at first, but I guess I have to go for it anyway?1 -
I want to fire crucio on my office people.No specific reason,but I have seen them enough for this week.Thankfully , weekends are finally here.
2 -
This person has never heard of the saying that there is no 'I' in team. He just focuses on the code not communicating whatsoever. F*CKtard
Meanwhile i'm trying to fix everything that broke down since yesterday 00:00.
Meanwhile other coworkers are also screaming their project is on fire...
should i quit?2 -
So like many others, you decided to make money off your hobby and skills, now you see a raspberry pi and want to set it on fire. See a terminal? Wanna rm -rf / the shit out of it? Soooo, since we've become bored and tired of this shit, have you ever thought in what profession you'd be happy?
Passionate of what you do even if the pay is low, but you finish your day with a smile in the face rather than a post in devrant.6 -
Imagine you're on fire continuously running past a pit of scorpions. Being pressured kind of feels like this anyway.6
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Exciting and challenging projects really helps with burnout. I didn't really believe that the solution is to work more it sounds stupid, but it reminded me why I love my craft, it was worth the sleepless nights(wouldn't do it in the long term). I hope you get the opportunity to work on something that you are passionate about and reignite that fire 🙂4
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Left the backplate for aircoolers in Canada, only brought the one for the water cooler I gave away here... So I'm patiently waiting for the replacement to come... 😇
Just kidding, I took the water cooler backplate off, got some twist ties, and strapped the new air cooler on. My computer hasn't caught fire yet. 😎 -
Last week:
Me: ++'s a rant. "Hey! That person was spot on!
Forgot about it.
This week:
Me: ++'s same rant. "Damn, this person is on fire!" Noticed that the number of ++'s dropped by one.
You guessed it. Same rant.
Should really stop smoking weed and reading deviant during work hours...1
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