Join devRant
Do all the things like
++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatar
Sign Up
Pipeless API
From the creators of devRant, Pipeless lets you power real-time personalized recommendations and activity feeds using a simple API
Learn More
Search - "shit code"
-
Dev: Microsoft is shit
VS Code: (ಥ⌣ಥ)
Dev: Oh not you dear! You're not like the other guys
VS Code: (。◕‿◕。)45 -
HTML: Hate This Meaningless Life
CSS: Can't Style Shit
JS: Just Shit
Java: Just another vicious asshole
PHP: PHP Hates People
Go: (the "fuck yourself" is silent)
.NET: Now Everybody Thinks (they can code)
I really should find a more productive thing to do on my breaks.19 -
So here I am in iceland watching Aurora with my gf, and suddenly I realized somewhere in my code at work I freaking forgot to add 1 to the denominator of a fraction. Shitty shit shit, gonna go back to work finding NaNs everywhere. Fuck fuck fuck10
-
Code not working.
Comment out code.
Slowly rewrite it bit by bit till it works again.
Check against commented code.
They're the same.
Wtf.
Seven hours wasted on this shit :/3 -
I'm dreaming to send homework to my C++ programing lecturer full of strange #defines and make the code compilable, runnable and working well
He would feel the black side of cpp😈😈😈18 -
Said my code is self explanatory and doesn't need comments.
After few minutes "wtf is this shit?".5 -
So apparently somone put Snapchat's iOS source code on github. I love the capitals in this DMCA notice like SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! take it down already.
https://github.com/github/dmca/...16 -
I am the only guy who pauses to look at the code in every hacking/coding scene either in a movie or series? Coz that shit is sometimes hilarious9
-
Working alone is great. You won't have to deal with others shit coding and others won't have to handle your shit coding.
Code free, code alone!3 -
Mom : there's a letter for you. It's from USA. Are you in trouble ?
Me : oooouh shit what have I done ?
Fiuuuuu..NSA still not tracking my buggy code 😂9 -
After opening the legacy code and finding out that the entire shit has 15000+ LOC and without proper commentsundefined devrant please help fbi fucking comment the code properly comments thensa legacy code notnsa devil wk58 god3
-
I'm so fucking tired of all these "teach kids to code" and "everyone can code" shit.
It's genuinely not for everyone. Some people are not meant to code, so stop trying to force it down everyone's throat because we're going to end up with a lot of people doing it because of a nice job and shit, not because they want to.
I get many of these programs and shit are to expose people to it and all, but fucking hell stop trying to make everyone fucking programmers23 -
Advising a person about a code that he has created and you don't know shit about. In dev culture it is considered a dick move.😑6
-
Friend: can you take a look at me code?
Me: sure, it's all shit!
Friend: You didn't even look!?
Me: did you write the code?
Friend: yes...
Me: well, I don't have to look, I can smell ur shitty code!5 -
Reviewing coworker's code:
Me: I see you're doing a convoluted sort for every element twice to get your two lists in sync... 😐
CoWorker: Yeah. *straight face, no regrets* That's the only way to do this.
Me:... Uh... No? You can just manage one list with a simple struct and then use the the standard sort.
Coworker: Yeah sure I know. But it'll take time. We don't have time.
Me: *aghast* This is embarrassingly bad code!
Coworker: Don't worry, later on I'll use a hashmap for it. But this needs to be pushed now.
Me: *to myself, no you don't need a hashmap*
Okay, you do you but I can't back you on this. It isn't going to take a lot of time to correct it.
Next day.
Coworker: Hey can you review my code again?
Me: You've made the changes already? *in a bored tone, knowing that they wouldn't have changed shit*
Coworker: No this is a different file. Our manager agrees that we can worry about performance later.
Me: Sure. *😀🔨🔨*
Few weeks pass by:
QA: The operation takes absurdly long time to complete even with the smallest data. Ten minutes for X is unacceptable.
Me: Who would've known? ☺️21 -
Business: How long will it take to add that feature to the legacy system?
Programmer: When will the new system be implemented?
Business: 6 months
Programmer: The new feature will take 7 months3 -
Code review, here the simplified version. What the fuck has to be wrong with someone who seriously codes the first variant in production code?!19
-
We all have that kind of friend who is losing his shit , screaming , swearing , crying , whenever the code doesn't work as planned.16
-
Start working on ticket
Looks at code
WTF is the shit?
Open devRant to rant
1.5 hours later
what was I doing?3 -
Why the fuck would you assign two new values to the same variable in consecutive lines like that ? I swear this project is driving me nuts. Fuck the dev who wrote this.4
-
Scaling a badly-written code which is not designed to scale.
Ended up re-writing the entire shit from scratch.4 -
I don't know why my position has to be labeled "developer", when in reality I ain't develop shit, all I do day after day is fixing legacy code7
-
Wrote 2000 lines of working code last night. All of a sudden teammate who didn't do shit says in group chat:
"You're slow man"
Fucking teamworks5 -
if you're like me putting whatever shit crosses your mind in code ALWAYS check before pushing to remote.
I just pushed this :|9 -
Fucking kill me right now please. How the FUCK am I supposed to get any shit done when I'm learning something and the fucking DOCUMENTATION has been UNAVAILABLE for the past THREE MOTHERFUCKING DAYS.
GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER MICROSOFT.
Fucking idiots.
It wouldn't be so fucking bad if things like this didn't happen all the time.
But when EVERYTHING is FUCKED - ALL THE TIME, it kinda makes a person lose all hope in humanity and technology.
A typical motherfucking day for me:
Wake up
Go to work
Come home
Eat dinner (if I remember)
Attempt to code shit for 1 - 3 hours before I have to sleep
CAN'T FUCKING CODE SHIT BECAUSE:
1. Internet disconnects every 5 fucking minutes
2. DOCUMENTATION SITES ARE FUCKING DOWN
3. Shit Windows is UPDATING
4. a previous windows UPDATE has royally motherFUCKED my PC
5. etc
FUCK14 -
Genuinely for me the satisfaction is when you write code that does really complex shit and your happy that it actually works.. Seriously satisfying3
-
Shit code. I've done it, you've done it, we've all done it. Just keep working hard and improving. Eventually, you'll be writing better... shit code.4
-
Me at QA, talking about a nasty bug I found in legacy code.
QA: what was the root cause?
Me: pos code.
QA: pos?!
Me: piece o' shit.
QA: ...1 -
I'm real tired of my coworkers always trying to one up me and being elitist about their code. Like I get it, you think PHP is shit, C is so much better than Java. Wow, you must be so knowledgeable! /s
Just because you're bashing on bad languages and talking shit doesn't mean you write good code, and in fact your code isn't top quality, I've read it. All you're going to accomplish with an elitist mindset is close yourself off to improving, and that's probably the worst thing you can do as a developer.8 -
And this scares the shit out of me.... Are we all doing harm in Developing code that seems to ease our work now, but might even kill us later...11
-
"Holy shit that was fucking traumatic to look at" you whisper under your breath
That moment you get the satisfaction of deleting 2468 lines of legacy code.5 -
Let's comment out this block of code so later we know we have this feature and bring it back if we need it.
Later: commented code everywhere, literally everywhere!!! Shit7 -
I was hired as a programmer, but I feel like the correct term is reprogrammer, because no one can code for shit at my job...1
-
Junior dev:Hey,see my code works :)
*After analysis of code*
Senior dev:Let's talk about complexity bro
Junior dev: shit :( -
Trying to understand someone else’s undocumented fucked code is as frustrating as taking a shit and the water slashing up at you.4
-
When you are watching a talk about microservices and the speaker start talking about pros and cons...
Fuck that shit, show me the code!6 -
Unless you had a horrible accident where you lost most of your fingers, I don't understand why anyone would do this. I had to double check I wasn't looking at obfuscated code.
```
String a;
String flag;
String tp;
String n;
String chn;
String lt;
String lg;
String bid;
String d;
```11 -
WTF BOSS?
STOP WRITING THESE FUCKING OBVIOUS SQL INJECTABLE CODE YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT!!!
BURN MOTHERFUCKER, BURN!!!3 -
STOP CODING MUTHERFUCKER AND THING YOU DUMB FUCK!!! THIIIINK!!!! IMPROVE!!! LEARN NEW SHIT!!!
STOP CODING TO CODE BETTER!13 -
Developers
that
put
every
line
of
code
on
a
new
line
Why??????? Seriously this shit is not making it more readable you know12 -
Fellow dev complaining about server.
Me: My servers could handle the 10x traffic. If they weren't busy apologising for your shit codebase !
*First Rant btw*6 -
Refactoring someone else's code (the dude's a senior).
I'm a junior, just updated my linkedin, burnout activated, I can't deal with this kind of shit no more.
Outro: this is the nicest piece of code from him, every other line of code just .... just.... D:14 -
Do you know what i hate most?
... commented old code!
What is the fucking purpose to comment old code IF YOU ARE USING A VERSION CONTROL SYSTEM?????
Commented old code is shit, because it fucks the readibility! I saw entire class full of this shit!
DELETE IT, YOU DON'T LOSE IT YOU MORON!!!!5 -
This is next level shit...
My friend in college is always sending me his C code for debugging IN FUCKING .odt!!
He even highlights the syntax.5 -
Android oreo made me change so much code and broke so much shit like background services that my latest branch in git is FuckAndroidOBranch6
-
Holy shit looks exciting, an actual split window manager with custom layouts on win10?
https://insider.windows.com/en-us/...13 -
When starting a project at work:
My name everywhere. Every file, every change-list I proudly put my name to prove my skills.
Program goes for validation:
Thousands of bugs.
Realize that I've written shit code. Slowly removing my names from all over the code. -
I don't always leave my job..
But when I do, I leave a bunch of shitty code that will make the next developer suffer.
That's what they get if they keep asking 'We need it now/today'4 -
When you have a huge project, and encounter a bug, but don't know where it is, and why it is happening...1
-
Continuation from :
https://devrant.io/rants/835693/...
Hi everybody! I am sorry that as a first time poster I am building 2 long stories, but I really like the idea of connecting with other people here!
Well, as I was mentioning before, I got a job in Android development and had a blast with it. Me and the developer clicked and would spend our time discussing PHP, the move to other stacks (I was making him love the idea of Django or Spring Java) games, bands and cool stuff like that. This dude was my hero, his own stack was developed in a similar MVC fashion that he had implemented from scratch before for many projects. It was through him that I learned how to use my own code (rather than frameworks and other libraries) to build what I wanted. I seriously thought that I had it made with a position that respected me and placed me in the lead mobile development position of the company. Then it happened. He had taken 2 weeks of unauthorized leave, which was ok since he was best friends with the owner of the company, those 2 along another asshole started it so they could do whatever they wanted. And I could not make much progress without him being there since there were things that he needed to do, that I was not allowed, for me to continue. When he came back I was quickly rushed to the owner of the company's office to discuss my lack of progress. The lead developer was livid, as if he knew that he had fucked up. He blamed the whole thing on me (literally told the owner that it was my fault before I was summoned) and that we lost 2 weeks of business time because I did not had the initiative to make progress on my own. I felt absolutely horrible, someone that I had trusted and befriended doing something like that, I really felt like shit. I had mad respect and love for this guy. It got heated, I showed the owner the text messages in which I showed him my pleas to led me finish the parts that were needed while he was away. Funny enough, he acted betrayed. After that it was 3 months of barely talking to one another except for work related stuff. He got cold and would barely let me touch the internal code that he was developing. It was painful. The owner kept complaining about progress and demanded that I do a document scanner for the company, which was to be attached to their mobile application. Not only that but it had to be done with OpenCV. Now, CV is great, but it is its own area, it takes a while to be able to develop something nice with it that is efficient and not a shitstorm.
I had two weeks.
Finished in one. After burning my brain and ensuring that the c++ code was not giving issues and the project was steady I turned it in...to their dismay. And I say so because I felt that they gave me such a huge project with the intention of firing me if it was not done. After that it was constant shit from the owner and the lead developer. I was asked then to port the code to the IOS version. I had some knowledge of it already so I started working on it. Progress was fast since the initial idea was already there and I really love working on Apple devices. And when I was 70% done the owner decided to cut me loose. At first he cited things such as lack of funding and him being unable to pay my salary. I was fine with that even though I knew it was not true. So at the time I just nodded and thanked the company for my time there. Before I left, he decided to blame it on me, stating that if they were not producing money that it was perhaps my fault. I lost my shit, and started using my military voice to explain to him how a software company is normally ran. Then I stormed out.
It was known to me, that the lead developer had actually argued against me being laid off. And that he was upset about it, we made amends, but the fact remains that I was laid off because the owner did not think of me as an asset, regardless of how many times I worked alongside the lead developer or how valuable I was actually to the company, their infrastructure did get better while we worked together, so I just assumed that he never actually did any mention of my value.
I lasted 2 months without a job, feeling horribly shitty because my wife had to work harder to ensure our stability whilst I was without any sort of salary. At this time I had already my degree, so all I had to do was look better. In the meantime I decided to study more about other technologies. I learn React, and got way better at JS and Node that I thought I could and was finally able to get another job as a full stack developer for another company.
I have been here since 2 months. It has been weird, we do classic ASP, which is completely pointless at this time, but meh. At this time though, I just don't really have the same motivation. Its really hard for me to trust the people that I work with and would like to connect with more developers.21 -
Annoying thing happened at work as usual -> can't get the mood to code -> procrastinate -> finally get my shit together -> get some work done -> shit it's 07.00 PM I should be going home already -> still coding because I started late -> shit it's 09.00 PM -> get the fuck home -> I need time to be alone and relieve stress by surfing the web -> shit it's 02.00 AM -> try to get some sleep -> Why did she left me? How's dad doing? God I think I that function that I coded today is awful, gotta fix it tomorrow. Am I going to afford a house EVER? Fuck what I'm doing with my life. -> Shit it's 05.00 AM, I MUST SLEEP. -> (kinda sleep) -> Fuck it's 10.00 shit shit shit shit -> arrive at work -> I'm not ready to open the code -> procrastinate -> ...4
-
"Awwww I remember when I started to code :)"
That is for condescension when looking at shit code or:
"Wait, you code?"
For the same case1 -
Friend - could you comment your code, so I can review it pls.
Me - *comments "gets shit done" ,
"Does some shit ",
"I really don't like commenting my code "4 -
Shit you can apply this to coding too.
"When you fix a bug in your code"
Red: Actually does what you want
Blue: Completely fucks your entire program up.10 -
90%+ of production issues are caused by developers believing production machines are magic and have unlimited resources so can handle any shit code they write11
-
Dear Google, please notify devs before you overhaul apis in Android, I hate updating my api level and then my code won't build, this ia extremely shitty, where I have to now update random Android code because of deprecated apis, Shit Google.3
-
Well I’ve decided to create this... the code still shit though, when its good i’ll put it in devRants collab4
-
VS Code is cool and everything, but man, PyCharm is some next-level shit. And the best part: free for students.14
-
It will never stop happening... people who don't know shit about code, assuming some conclusion and giving their opinions on software.3
-
WanBLowS Vusta is more stable than this piece of shit that you call code. Yet you call yourself a programmer? Goddammit, even the shit that I dump in the toilet looks better. Because at least that thing is honest about being shit, unlike this craptacular mess that you call an application. Maybe consider kill -9 $(pidof life).3
-
Recently I learned about the song "Bück Dich" from Rammstein.. just imagine showing that shit to the "I'm offended by terminology in code" SJW's 🤣
https://youtu.be/jJqy_f83QAo6 -
Got a simple task
Decided to refactor some related shit so I don't have duplicated code
Get loads of problems with the shit I'm trying to refactor, now I'm late with the simple task13 -
Being a programmer in a scientific discipline can be infuriating.
using "no one" ="almost no one"
using everyone = "almost everyone"
1. No one knows what even the very idea of good practice is. And everyone refuses to learn. 3k lines of repetitive copy pasted main. 500 lines of plotting method.
2. Raw C-style pointer based array creation. Won't use develope array libraries because what if development stops. FUCKING HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR CODE WHAT IF DEVELOPMENT ON YOUR CODE STOPS. FUCK.
3. LOOP VARIABLES DECLARED AT THE BEGINNING OF THE METHOD WHY.
4. Everyone wants to make modular, independent code. No one wants to use OOP. NOPE. ALL IN ONE FILE. WRITE C++ LIKE A FUCKING PYTHON NOTEBOOK. FUCK.
5. LIBRARIES OH MY GOD PLEASE DO NOT CODE UP YOUR MATRIX MULTIPLICATION. PLEASE DO NOT TRIPLE LOOP IT. NO. THE LINEAR ALGEBRA LIBRARY WILL STAY IN DEVELOPMENT.
6. Please realize that literally not one comment over an 1800 line file does not help anyone.
FUCKING. WHY. WHY ARE WE SCIENTISTS SO GOOD AT SCIENCE AND SO FUCKING SHIT AT THE CODE THAT MAKES OUR SCIENCE HAPPEN. WHY. FUCKING. WHY. FUCK.undefined rage no comments scientific computing fuck this shit wall of text bad code science fuck c++ fucking4 -
Nightmare IRL:
Your colleague is in PTO for 2 weeks.
You are in charge of maintaining his project along with yours, CI, code, tests and everything.
Your colleague's code base is a real master piece of shit when you look at it closer. By shit, I mean hardcoded values everywhere, random sleeps now and then, 20 if branches that could be replaced by maps, variables named a b c d everywhere, try catch to silence errors that should not be silenced, etc.
Your colleague left the CI and code broken as shit. Takes forever to run on my goddamn computer.
PMs are spamming you: "What is going on? It's red everywhere. Help! Plz fix this! We are going to release tomorrow!"
FML6 -
try {
// something
} catch (SomeException e) {
}
Swallowed Exception.. what the fuck is wrong with you?! And I see this shit in a lot of places in the code!7 -
After 10 years maintaining the same codebase, I sometimes find features in the system that I wrote years ago and I forgot they existed, like "Cool, I didn't know the system was able to do that, I completely forgot, I wonder how it works, and God knows how I wrote this shit, let's see..".
I've even found myself starting to implement features that already exist, and then having to revert the changes.3 -
Not really a rant.
When you start learning a new prog paradigm focused on a particular branch of math and then see it being used to solve a sudoku puzzle in 3 lines of code. Well, that shit changes you and makes you wonder how much shit in the field we don't focus in for being too concerned with everythingPython and everythingNode
Brain is mush but I am loving this shit.9 -
Holy shit, today I was the first person to arrive at work... And then the alarm came on... I didn't knew the code 😅 sooooo a panic phone call later, I turned it off but holy Shit... I've never had this rush this early of the day
-
Holy fuck is learning new frameworks frustrating.
I'm trying to setup a simple fucking flutter app and all their tutorials are basic shit with no auth/complex routing.
Any feature of flutter that's not in a tutorial has absolute shit documentation with 0 examples on how to use it.
Material app has like 20 properties and if you click on something like on generate there is shit for knowing what the fuck it's expecting.
Stackoverflow has a ton a code but that's just it, code. I have absolutely no idea how they generate the code they have from the documentation on the site. They must have been following flutter from the start.
Ahhhhh! 😠13 -
Learned a new word here in devRant: sleep code.
Code that's is written where you hardly can get an eye open.
Crazy shit 😵
Edit: Yeah, I count sleep code as one word (or phrase if this will satisfy you before commenting)11 -
I need a room to scream. Fuckin fuck every asshole cunt who sees shit code and decides its ok to write more shit code rather than fix it, absolute fuckin cunts10
-
I came to this company. I saw spaghetti code. I told myself to write clean code and also clean the existing code. I took too much pressure for too little return. I am done with this shit. I will now write clean code but fuck the old spaghetti code!2
-
Shit recruiters say:
"We need solution experts, not language experts, because a language is just a tool."
Well then, good luck with your spaghetti code solution.3 -
Having to deal with shit code as a new employee so you don't step on any toes...
Who knew developers had such egos. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯10 -
I like coding in a way that anyonr who comes into my code base can understand whats going on. That way more people can maintain the code base.
However, I HATE having people in my code base. Since they leave shit undocumented, and have 10 variables called "data" "items" "o" "p" and another 20 methods called "processData" "convertItem".1 -
We got a different programming teacher for today. He's shit. He can't even efficiently code a simple C# program that prints out three numbers as sorted ascendingly. WHAT THE FUCK12
-
Fuck you google android IME team and fuck their open source policy..
So recently i had a chance to work with AOSP LatinIME code, basically our Android keyboard was forked from very old code base of LatinIME and my job was to change its base version to latest Version available on AOSP repository. Downloaded latest Android 8 codebase. Did 2 weeks of deep investigation of what improvements we will get from upgraded code base.
And I came to know that those Google fucking cunt sucking dick heads deprecated that project and broke the whole thing to a pice of shit. Half of the code is broken with fucked up todo stuff and motherfucking missing method implementation with not implemented warnings. What those motherfucker did is that they abandoned the open-source project after they released Google GBoard, and fucked the stable code by adding quard gram support and dictionary download with multi account features which was never completed by those motherfuckers..
Those misguiding donkey shit fuckers kept a depreciated project in AOSP build tree which has not received a single fucking commit from shitty ass Google IME team, is said to be reference model of Android IME implementation..
What kind of fucking shit is going with open-source code in name of making competition high with thirt party Android keyboard developers ..
Fucking shit fucking ime team .. fuck you .. wasted my fucking time reading your shitty code base .. Fucking shit1 -
VSCode you fucking piece of shit!
Just got my code working and rewarded myself with tweaking some of the configurations. Coming back to my file and it's all irrevertably messed up with randomly pasted and probably some deleted code snippets.
How's that even possible? 😡9 -
you motherfucking cocksucking ass wipes.
How fucking hard is it for you JS cockheads to have STABLE fucking code?
So hear I am, thinking through a side project for data extraction and loading to automate some shitty part of my job, that could be used by the broader team... and decide to use electron.... I know it's a clusterfuck, but this wouldn't be a big application, so against my better judgement I run:
npm install electron
npm start
...
Error: unknown spawn
🤷♂️ you had 1 fucking job... 1 fucking lousy shit stain of a job, and you can't even have something run out of the god foresaken box without someone debugging your shit.
Now who has a WORKING alternative to electron?10 -
When you come to work eager to code, and the whole day goes to trying and failing to fix some network shit -_-2
-
When in internship you have to read 150000 lines of code to make changes and the code does not have any comments, no indentation, no documentation, no wiki. You'll be like fuck this shit. I'm outta here.1
-
Doing and Code Review today... Not sure if this guy has really bad OCD, gets bored, or gets stuck and starts commenting the shit of things...
I'm not sure if I like it or hate it... typically "Good code should be self documenting" but this actually might be acceptable... code on the left, 10K foot view on the right?4 -
Put me under pressure and I’ll produce the best code I’ve ever written.
Put me under a microscope and I won’t produce jack shit 😂😬5 -
That moment when you magically lose your undo history and can't rollback the shit code you just wrote.3
-
When you're really fuckin proud of that extremely clean, elegant, efficient 30 lines of code. It might not be important, but holy shit it's pretty!!3
-
The ability to look at uncommented legacy code and read the thoughts of the developer when he wrote it
(seriously, comment your shit!) -
How do you deal with massively poorly-performing and unknowledgeable teams?
For background, I've been in my current position for ~7 months now.
A new manager joined recently and he's just floored at the reality of the team.
I mean, a large portion of my interview (and his) was the existing manager explicitly warning about how much of a dumpster fire everything is.
But still, nothing prepares you for it.
We're talking things like:
- Sequential integer user ids that are passable as query string args to anonymous endpoints, thus enabling you to view the data read by that view *for any* user.
- God-like lookup tables that all manner of pieces of data are shoved into as a catch-all
- A continued focus on unnecessary stored procedures despite us being a Linq shop
- Complete lack of awareness of SOLID principles
- Actual FUD around the simplest of things like interfaces, inversion of control, dependency injection (and the list goes on).
I've been elevated into this sort of quasi-senior position (in all but title - and salary), and I find myself having to navigate a daily struggle of trying to not have an absolute shit fit every time I have to dive into the depths of some of the code.
Compounded onto that is the knowledge that most of the team are on comparable salaries (within a couple thousand) of mine, purely owing to length of service.
We're talking salaries for mid-senior level devs, for people that at market rates would command no more (if even close) than a junior rate.
The problem is that I'm aware of how bad things are, but then somehow I'm constantly surprised and confronted with ever more insane levels of shitfuckery, and... I'm getting tired.
It's been 7 months, I love the job, I'm working in the charity sector and I love the fact that the things I'm working on are directly improving people's lives, rather than lining some fintech fatcat's pockets.
I guess this was more a rant than a question, and also long time no see...
So my question is this:
- How do you deal with this?
- How do you go on without just dying inside every single day?8 -
sometimes, editing bad code, makes me wanna meet the the person who wrote it. just to see the sick mind responsible for the piece of shit im looking at!2
-
ARRRGGHHH! When the person sitting next to you produces nothing but shit and you know it's shit but, your boss doesn't because he's never written single byte of code in his life!2
-
How I feel when im asked to add functionality to a project that was built like 10+ years ago and needs refactored in its entirety but the code base is so terrible that youre honestly better off just starting it from scratch but you are thrown into 5 other million things and there is no time to do it so you just shit out the bare minimum code that will not break the rest of the application.4
-
a lesson that I learned the hard way: Don't test a code or a library on your master branche, in other words: don't shit where you eat.3
-
SHIT. Power cut, don't know yet how much code lost, train of thought destroyed. 2 hours to wait to find out. Time for a 4g wank methinks.3
-
(I guess the Question category is the best for this)
Do you believe that someone can be a good dev even if they write shit code?
I personally do, if that person acknowledges the fact that their code is shit, wants to improve it, is humble, is always in the search for constructive, etc as in to make their code better and more readable, I'd think they are a pretty good dev.2 -
Look at other peoples code, analize it, absorb patterns, let those patterns replace the shit I have to learn in school, review code, code with those patterns, feel weird, because something is missing, repeat3
-
I can’t remember shit
My code editor helps me a ton!!
I have most documentation offline.
Ask me to do shit in a job interview without Google or any reference material then the joke is on 🤡2 -
Hey Visual Studio, WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK MY CODE IS SUDDENLY READ ONLY YOU BLOATED PIECE OF SHIT5
-
Our code base is shit.
To improve, we went through different coaching style: Freudian Psychoanalysis, behavioural psychology, gestalt
- Freudian Psychoanalysis: After several years refactoring and discussing our technical debt we can say that we really understand our code in deep. But it's still shit
- Behavioural psychology: after some months of work, we built a lot of testing. Now the code is still shit, but we don't get dirty anymore
- Gestalt: after few weeks sessions, the code is still shit. But we don't care anymore, we accept it and we are happy
(note. it's an adapted psychology joke)1 -
If I had to audit my current code I'd definitly stick a cactus up my arse shouting in the mirror:
ALL YOUR CODE IS GOOD FOR IS ULTIMATE DELETION. YOU FILTHY MAGGOT! LEARN TO CODE... *rage quit*
Really, coding shit because of spare time simply makes me ripping my face of 💀 -
Today looking at code thinking to myself "I thought I fixed that code...shit that was in my dream!"
Why me?! -
When i think
I cant fuckin do shit right
When i just code without thinking
I fuckin code it right
Fucc oyu4 -
Anybody remember when we actually spent time writing code instead of debugging the tools? Specially the gazillion of crap that's out there for fucking Java shit?11
-
One day i started to code.
One day i was told you will not code without git.
Many days i lost code on git because i was ignorant.
Today i reset the act of commiting without losing all my shit.
Git reset --soft HEAD^
I didnt event sweat it ;)
Today i feel like half a boss!!! -
It's a Friday and buzzing from refactoring absolute shitty CSS code by reducing it by 2200 lines (and still not complete). Who the Fuck wrote this complete piece of shit!4
-
It's terrible how my mood is greatly dependent on whether my code works or not.
Feeling like shit at the moment.4 -
6 Months later...
Me: Oh God! This code is horrible! Who wrote this crap?
Also Me: Shit, it was me.1 -
5 years ago in Texas. There is shit code and then there's SHIT code. I know I can produce bad code and often do, but that codebase was an eldritch abomination.
Just to give you a tiny taste, variables in JS would usually be called "that" because "when calling them, I send the 'this' value right? So in the other function it is 'that'". I wish I was making this up. And this is nothing compared to everything else.12 -
What the FUCK is wrong with people!!!??
If you need to use !important in your CSS.... STOP and just don't.
It should be very clear that if the need arises to use !important then you are either really shit at CSS and don't understand the concept or you are a lazy mother fucker.
I'm so fucking sick of dealing with other so called "developers" shit code and have to spend time I don't have fixing their shit.
There is absolutely no reason to use
!important and to anyone that thinks to be a smartarse and let me know of their shit reasons... just don't because there aren't any.4 -
Just going through some old code from git repo's and code examples and I have a message to every dev out there after seeing some of the code quality...
Never... ever... ever fucking give variables with names like vx, tr and sq.
Give your variables names that explain what they are, it is so fucking hard trying to follow code that has 2 letter variable names and there is a special place in hell for you :-)3 -
I just fucking hate compiling this fucking C# (ASP.NET) code and then transferring to staging server. Fuck you.....no no no listen to me fuck you and fuck this shit.8
-
Dear world:
For you headphones are for music for devs they mean: shut the fuck up and let me code 😒
I hope world understands this shit -
5000 scss file with the name global.scss styling.
How fucking dumb can you be to fucking mess up a clean component based architecture like Foundation or Bootstrap and fill it with shit in a single file.
No wonder WP gets shit. The legacy code is usually shit.
And to put the shit cherry on top. This motherfucker had a settings.scss file with all general components and he never used it.
Fucker put different font size in px everywhere! Fucking asshole!!! -
Legit my only answer to fixing shit code for a nursing app at work is.....
Writing more shit code. Man the dude that developed this before had 0 clue what he was doing.....and because shit grew out of control there is shitcode everywhere.
I like writing shit code though. It is good practice.
Writing shit code without knowing is one thing. You really do reach expert level when you write shit code WHILE being fully aware of it.1 -
I'm testing a shitforbrains code in production because I don't have any other options. He went on vacation and said that the code should work, and if it doesn't it is my problem.
I am contemplating taking a shit under his desk and working from home. Then he would have to deal with my shit aswell. Literally.
The tables have turned my friend...4 -
- get out of bed
- piss
- take out retainers
- wash retainers
- brush teeth
- put clothes on
- put glasses on
- get downstairs
- code
- shit 10 times
- code
- go upstairs
- put retainers on
- get clothes off
- go to bed
- get out of bed
- piss
- take out retainers
- wash retainers
- brush teeth
- put clothes on
- put glasses on
- get downstairs
- code
- shit 10 times
- code
- go upstairs
- put retainers on
- get clothes off
- go to bed
- get out of bed
- piss
- take out retainers
- wash retainers
- brush teeth
- put clothes on
- put glasses on
- get downstairs
- code
- shit 10 times
- code
- go upstairs
- put retainers on
- get clothes off
- go to bed
- get out of bed
- piss
- take out retainers
- wash retainers
- brush teeth
- put clothes on
- put glasses on
- get downstairs
- code
- shit 10 times
- code
- go upstairs
- put retainers on
- get clothes off
- go to bed
- get out of bed
- piss
- take out retainers
- wash retainers
- brush teeth
- put clothes on
- put glasses on
- get downstairs
- code
- shit 10 times
- code
- go upstairs
- put retainers on
- get clothes off
- go to bed
I AM FUCKING TIRED OF LIVING THIS MATRIX BULLSHIT LIKE A FUCKING ROBOT EVERY DAY IS THE FUCKING SAME AND ITS EXHAUSTING THERES NOTHING NEW JOYFUL OR FUN HERE18 -
Look, normally I don't give a shit how others code, but when the company's style guide is literally just the statement "use eslint", and I have to do code reviews...we will start to have problems.1
-
Always thought windows source code would be the most untidy and disgusting code i could imagine but then I realised world of warcraft existed... Just imagine how horrible that shit would be!1
-
When you change one line of your source code and all of the rest of code don't work any more. Fucking Shit!2
-
Dev: Woah look at this code! I might be a genius!
Also dev a few months later: Woah WTH is this shit? Was I totally dumb or what?2 -
Angular material is shit.
Angular material has literally no documentation. There is no search on their shit docs. And there is absolutely no info in their docs about some shit they use.
So when you need to know what the fuck does smth like MatOption mean (what inputs does this piece of fuck takes?) you will need to dig into the code.1 -
You don't need a mechanical keyboard to code for long hours but shit sure does become smooth af with a cherry MX red.2
-
Jenga driven programming:
Stack pieces of code on top of each other until everything falls down and you have to restart shit.2 -
Oh Halsey, I think you better compile that shit and see for yourself.. But don't we all code with this in mind? 😅4
-
People hear talking about shit like "*high level stuff* SUCKS. YOU *big tech company* FUCKTARD." And I'm just here trying to graduate without failing a CS course because my teachers want me to mug up the code and not understand it! Needless to say, I don't mug up but it's just so fucking irritating when people in your class are mugging up the code and definitions like it's Redbull and scoring stellar grades. FUCK THIS SHIT!4
-
When you look back at your shit spaghetti code you only wrote 3 days ago, and you don't know whether to laugh or cry.😆😢1
-
Fuck the design guidelines that change every fucking day. It makes Front-End an unbearable hell. I'm seriously tired of having to code stupid shit for exceptions exceptions exceptions.5
-
Every month I re-evaluate the code I had written previously to compare my progress in coding standards...
Turns out I need a time machine to go back in time and slap myself1 -
Let me tell all of you who don't like big frameworks..
The nice thing about them is that they minimize the amount of SHIT CODE all of you who think you know how to code, but actually don't, write..
And minimizes the amount of headache for the devs who need to then maintain/fix/change your SHIT CODE.
yes...lets put routes 10 dirs deep into the project and let ppl look for it..3 -
always put timeouts on your connection code..number of times I see shit blocked forever ..and we know it’s not good to have your shit blocked5
-
I've been working on an ERP system for several years and we had a module to record your presence time.
The code was absolute shit but at least the method names matched.
The method to record the end of your work was named "outhouseRecord".
One translation for outhouse seems to be a toilet outside. -
You know what I had to deal with
A bunch of these shit
try{
//Shitty cluster fuck excuse for java
//code
}catch(Exception e){
}1 -
I want to code my side project.
Work is trivial, repetitive, irrelevant.
I wished I was rich so I could work on shit I'm actually interested worked in.2 -
Picking up some uncomment code:
var_dump() and console.log() everywhere
1h later: shit I think I lost it again...
2h later: It was a 2-3 lines fix..
fml1 -
At 1pm,The fucking boss told me to get UI design and code for a risk management system be ready on 5pm, i DID it!!! Requires no changes or edits!!! Its done!!!
Shit fuck shit!!!!1 -
You know shit is getting real when you save and you watch your code formatted start rolling through your code like you're watching someone ... write code...
-indent here-
-pause-
-indent here-
Me: Oh man what have I done?!?!?!4 -
Feelin' not prepared but also prepared for code samples and tech interviews. Can companies just believe that we are capable of building awesome shit & hire us?! You feel me?2
-
FCUKING SHIT X-FUNCING-CODE! Collapsed code by mistakenly typing the shortcut now I cannot fucking EXPAND IT AGAIN T_T T_T T_T3
-
Me: trying to do any simple fucking project
Me: cant figure out how to do something simple or cant figure out how to start or how something should work.
Me *Looks up problem* (everytime...)
results: SOMETHING I WOULD NEVER HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT OF.
Am I just a shitty programmer, a shitty learner, or just not cut out for this? because I fucking Love this field. this is the only thing I ever want to do. BUT I CANT FIGURE ANYTHING OUT FOR THE LIFE OF ME EVEN WITH LANGUAGES IM GOOD AT!! WHICH IS JUST PYTHON AND IM STILL SHIT AT THAT.
I TRY TO DO PROJECTS WITH JS, OR C, OR PYTHON PICK WHICHEVER ONE. AND I NEVER KNOW HOW I SHOULD START IT, AND IF I LOOK UP HOW TO DO IT ITS SO MUCH LONGER AND COOLER AND BETTER THAN MY DUMBASS WOULD HAVE DONE (and longer in a good way because its well thought out and works)
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET A REAL JOB IN THE FIELD IF I CANT MAKE THE RANDOM IDEAS THAT I SEE ON THE INTERNET AND WHY CANT I MAKE THEM AS GREAT OR LONG AND SHIT ON MY OWN. SO MANY PEOPLE CAN WRITE SO MANY LINES OF CODE AND FUNCTIONS AND ALL THIS SHIT THAT WORKS AND YEAH THEY LOOK UP SOME PROBLEMS BUT NOT HOW TO FUCKING DO THE ENTIRE THING LIKE SOME FUCKING RETARD
AWDJKBAKWJBDAOLK;JWDBOALBJKWODANLWIO;NIAWDN;PIAWLDJBAWIDHB
I CANT GO A PROJECT WITHOUT LOOKING UP HOW TO DO ANYTHING BECAUSE MY LITTLE BRAIN CANT FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO IT18 -
How greedy can you get?
> boss takes half assed gdpr project : branch xyz
> branch xyz requires deprecated version of npm/node
> I re-install node this time with deprecated version
> Wow this node is configured with ant build
> ECMA 5, config but code is shit as fuck
> still I get the job done , cannot test it because code is shit as fuck and I will never any thing to fix that un healthy code
> code doesn't run on client side,
> no shit Sherlock
> get a call from boss, it urget look in it and fix it -
I fucking hate shit/incomplete code tutorials, especially ones that reference old/unmanaged libraries. Fucking waste of time!!!!9
-
Stop commenting out code blocks!
Either fix your shit or delete it.
I am open to argue what fixing may mean, as it is perfectly fine to make your broken code not reachable, e.g. via feature flags or skipping certain tests. Yet never ever should you comment those blocks!
So you say you want to keep it for historic reasons? You know, that is why we use version control! If you ever need certain functionality back, you can restore that state.
Each decent IDE also offers a local history where you can even restore code blocks that weren't even pushed or committed. So use that!
Commenting out test cases is a really bad habit, as you have no reminder that you shall restore it.
And no, a TODO and a FIXME won't count as a reminder as you have to actively look for them. And we all know how well that goes, don't we? (One time, I found a typo of a `TDO`. So even with a regular lookup for TODO, stuff will slip.)
Each test suite offers you ways to skip tests if there are valid reasons why they should not fail the build temporary and they offer colorful feedback. Yes, that means that your tests won't be green, but guess what: That's a feature! They shouldn't be.
That yellow is a fine reminder, aka warning!, that you should really fix your shit.
Commented code screams: "I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING!" and it confuses the hell out of other developers ("Was this commented because of debugging purposes and should be active again or can I safely delete this!?") and adds verbose crap to the code base.
If you find yourself to be in a place that you comment code a lot, I also argue that your workflow is broken.
When you are using a decent debugger, there shouldn't that much of a need to comment in and out a lot of code in order to reason about your code-base.3 -
When McDonald's janitors are writing code...
Dev1: *creates a MR*
Code: for each HTTP request do
// stuff
Executors.newFixedThreadPool(validators.size()); // effectively meaning will start 7 new threads for each incoming request
// other stuff
Dev2: ^^ ??? Fix that shit. This will cause performance problems.
Dev1: *updates the code*
Code:
// stuff
int THREAD_NUMBER = 10;
Executors.newFixedThreadPool(THREAD_NUMBER);
// other stuff
Everyone: 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Can I BE facepalming any more?4 -
When you open problematic code and someone actually queried all the items from db inside for loop... And took only one item on specific index... Instead of iterating over items from query result... 😓😓5
-
What if the reviewer gives you bad reviews that lead to bad code, and you can't defend because he couldn't understand the shit you're talking about?3
-
Opens the source code for an app I have to integrate with.
Finds: if($cryptPW == $dbPW)
What the shit?!?!!!!!
Learn to hash! Far out 😢4 -
Your code is like your face! Looking at it often it makes me laugh... But sometimes I just want to punch the shit out of it!1
-
Why the fuck are there so many utterly useless programming blogs? I have to implement DES in C++ for our college project. After coding most of it step by step, I decided to swallow my pride and check for an implementation online to save time because I was confused in the XOR part. Now most programming blogs had the same code copy pasted. To top that, NAME YOUR FUCKING VARIABLES PROPERLY YOU MORONS! I decided I'm better off resolving my confusions the hard way.3
-
“Your code is so shit I could use it to torture people.“ - Some random kid from my Computer Science class (No, it wasn’t directed to me)
-
I forgot to create a branch and pushed directly to master...
Thankfully nobody reviews my code in this project or gives a shit anyways2 -
People behave so precious and try best to avoid working on other's code.
I'm naive to think that being "developer" entails reading and understanding other's code(a.k.a shit)4 -
How shit are my colleagues? This shit...
Export class TypescriptClass {
DataHasFinishedLoading: Promise;
doAThing() {
GetData()
. Subscribe(all The Data => {
//do some shit with the data
This. DataHasFinishedLoading = Promise. Resolve(true) ;
} )
}
}
This guy has about 10 years experience doing literally javascript. And this code made it through peer review.1 -
MOTHERFUCKER! Hours of debugging and one code block was indented wrong. Gotta love doing shit when tired...4
-
Fucking Java 8 java.time package. I want to kill the damn developers of this useless piece of shit code.1
-
I hate my pinky finger. Can't really activate that little shit while typing code. I recall smashing my fists on the wooden wall from anger, tho, might be the case.4
-
My Senior developer writes SHIT code. It 10 pm here and debugging his shitty logic, his shitty architecture. And there are PM who expect me to turn this SHIT to flower.2
-
Sometimes when I piss it goes on and off again, like 1s and 0s. If I put that in code it has less bugs then the shit you just committed.2
-
The shit code I wrote before my cs degree is marginally better than the shit code I write now. The lack of of improvement is related to the shit job I got after my degree. Cs degree did teach me a lot of good oo concepts and design.... That I rarely use due to shit legacy code I maintain.1
-
React Native, Flutter, Xamarine, Cordova hope all of you fucking burn in hell! Piece of shit solutions...
Just want to simply enable remote JS debuggin but the fucking app stops reloading when that shit is turned on. Now how the fuck am I supposed to know what the fuck is wrong with my code, disable remote JS debugging and app loads again.
Fuck this shit!6 -
Cheese and crackers this is the worst code I’ve ever seen... i hated visual basic before but when it’s written by incompetent devs it’s 1000 times worse. Brb going to go tear my eyes out before trying to debug this shit code.3
-
Have to change out the audio player on a WordPress site for a podcast. Can't follow the code properly because wp forgets that standards are a thing. Code readability is shit as well. Fucking WordPress.6
-
I fucking hate people who want to "perfect" his shit before push his code. Yes damn right. That means he doesn't fucking push his code until it's too late and his "perfect" shit will break everything. Not to mention the cry face he has when there are shitload of conflicts.
-
Web code editors are shit for interviews!!
I was given a timed interview test to code on a hackerearth’s code editor. First of all I have never used hackerearth’s code editor because they suck. The problem was very simple and I cleared the round anyways when an actual human saw my code. But my point is why are programmers creating shit editors for other programmers in a timed environment. I couldn’t figure out for the life of me how the fuck I should take an input and output that in this shit editor. The code logic was ready but the test cases failed.
So Should I be learning about hackerearth’s shit code editor in an interview with a timer or should I be judged on the code logic in the specified time?
I seriously find these web code editors most of them annoying. Cause they aint good enough. You need time figuring out the tools first and then code the logic.
Usually in your job you’re gonna use the editor of your choice. Not a fucking shit fucked half arsed hackerearth code editor. My rant is for those of you if you’re taking interviews on such platforms, be there. Don’t rely on those platforms. This automated crap is still crap.4 -
Merry Christmas everyone. Even to that motherfucking co-worker who pretends to be a cool developer but can’t code for shit.
-
I am acting as a code janitor
Cleaning other people's shitty code
#rage
Finished working on my module and there is avalanche of existing shit down the mountain which i have to cleanup because somehow it was fine before with all flies over it. -
Have my THEORY OF COMPUTATION exam tomorrow 😭
Shit load of YouTube videos left to cover. Turing machine, Chomsky-Normal form, Code generation... I'm so ded. Fuck my soul :/3 -
I am a good kid, and I love to code... but my fucking college makes me learn shit that I don't want to learn, that too in a computer science stream. Should I kill myself because I feel trapped and my precious life is being wasted learning shit.5
-
devRant stickers make me code better. I just can't write shit with you :/ amigos staring at me. I feel the pressure!
-
Typescript is a PIECE OF SHIT that adds 3 problems for every 1 it solves! Messing with so much shit from its linter and builder just so some OOP fools can code JS like *TAB* *TAB* *TAB* again!12
-
Because of this spaghettis shit of code I was unable to make some progress. now I have to bullshit my progress in the standup. because telling I wrote 0 lines of code feels like I should be ashamed of myself. FUCK!3
-
Cleaning up code warnings in a 3rd party piece of software and found a function that was returning a pointer to a local variable, who wrote this piece of shit?!1
-
Fuck this shit
I’m interning at this place and the code is ALL OVER THE PLACE. I have to rewrite every damn function and the code base is so obfuscated and stupid on multiple levels. I’m sick of this shit and literally every damn thing needs to be rewritten from scratch2 -
That feeling you have when you opened a file full of messy shit code and somewhere in there is a reference to another - more "shittier" - file.
-
Why tf is there no option for opening new windows as a modal dialog in asp.net from code behind. Tired of that shit.2
-
I'm moving some frontend views to a new layout. It involves lifting some state to increase performance (not load the same data 10 times). All fine and dandy - until I reach my colleagues code. Sure, they've not done a lot of frontend, but they don't ask for help either. So let me tell you - their code is crap. Really crappy. Better of, it's a bit more of a complicated component because it relies on some external constraints from another company, and that combined with the shitty code results in me having to rewrite the whole damn thing. Nice. Really fucking nice.
-
I really find it quite annoying when my colleague refactors my code. I personally don't see the point because I find my code more readable, easy to main and intuitive. That of course is a subjective view. Problem is, there aren't any competent colleagues who can weigh in their opinion on disagreements in the team. In fact, I'm pretty sure they aren't even developers, and have some how infiltrated their way in claiming to be a software developer.
Oh yeah, the manager doesn't review our performance or keep up to date with the work people are doing.
I'm not even exaggerating.1 -
Don't you just love when you try to recycle code you wrote 2 years ago just to find that the modules you used haven't been updated and your code has gone to shit ;)3
-
that feeling when you find out that all the code you've written the last month will be deleted because of some random shit not beeing supported.
-
FOR FUCKING FUCK SAKE
I have a shit ton work to do. Just finished (hopefully) all of my exams, came back to work and got tasked with simultaneously developing a new app (Android), adjusting some of my own code to work with client's specific requirements in completely different project (C#) and also I have to fix a legacy app (Android) because UE comitee will be visiting us on wendesday.
I've never seen this code earlier. I've never seen this WHOLE SHITTY PROJECT. Guy that was developing this left few years back.
It's a complete spaghetti. 550 FUCKING LINES OF CODE for a one class, most of the methods are deprecated and won't even try to work on Android > 4.0. No documentation. Nothing works. Whole code is ridden with bugs, warnings and looks like it's glued together with duct tape. I even had to migrate from fucking Maven to Gradle it's that old. -
I hate when programming books have shit code examples.
Just came across these, in a single example app in a Go book:
- inconsistent casing of names
- ignoring go doc conventions about how comments should look like
- failing to provide comments beyond captain obvious level ones
- some essential functionality delegated to a "utils" file, and they should not be there (the whole file should not exist in such a small project. If you already dump your code into a "utils" here, what will you do in a large project?)
- arbitrary project structure. Why are some things dumped in package main, while others are separated out?
- why is db connection string hardcoded, yet the IP and port for the app to listen on is configurable from a json file?
- why does the data access code contain random functions that format dates for templates? If anything, these should really be in "utils".
- failing to use gofmt
These are just at a first glance. Seriously man, wft!
I wanted to check what topics could be useful from the book, but I guess this one is a stinker. It's just a shame that beginners will work through stuff like this and think this is the way it should be done.3 -
Rushing to get a feature completed for a client presentation tomorrow has turned my Sass sheets into a nightmarish hellhole of classes, nesting, and questionable specificity. This is taking a huge liberty with "if it works, ship it."
-
Anyone else have the ritual of searching for curse words in code prior to committing & pushing your changes?8
-
Someone save me from this fucking stupid corporate web based trainings and let me focus on more important shit like re-factoring my code (ohh joke) and/or writing something more code then going what i just mentioned above.
-
Shit... watched too many videos about AI. Now I'm convinced human coding will be obsolete in the near future...
Hello code block, long time no see...1 -
After spending hours on just one code and not able to make it run,
here I am on devrant and announcing,
Life is Shit, Shit is life,
Coding is love, but being a coder is shit.2 -
PSD - Predictive software development:
Software development process where one predicts the behavior of the shit code in the library and writes code to handle it accordingly so that the aforementioned shot code doesn't barf and take down the entire system with it2 -
When you play on lagacy shit spaghetti monster code with a fucking ass crack boss don't understand anything and bullshit you (yaya that code is perfect) !
I just want to drop that fucking job full of shit
Week 2 😂🤣😭 8 months come2 -
I was wondering - no one seems to be able to write good CSS, so what if we had tool to generate CSS visually.
E.g. imagine workflow of UI design tools inside chrome browser (while inspecting specific element) or your favourite editor.
Might actually build something like that. Would definitely help with problems I face. 🤷🏻
P.S. Best tools and practices for building extensions like this?35 -
* Find something you don't really know or haven't used in your language of choice
* Push that feature in your architecture
* write shit code because the feature really shouldn't be there -
I hate unit test. I hate testing by code.
I hate the idea to write code that tests code. And that u must update both when u add a feature. Like wtf.
Good debug mode with clear verbose and precise reporting tool and voila.
Drives me nuts thus trending shit.10 -
In php echo is language construct.
In php echo is language construct.
In php echo is language construct.
In php echo is language construct.
In php echo is language construct.3 -
"Anyways trust code that you wrote before but... never rely on that!"
I wrote some code mounts ago, now when I want to refactor it see a bunch of shit, I delete them all and after hours write exactly the previous code!!! just because i don't put some STUPID comments... 😑1 -
Implementing a neural network, SHIT CODE got so complicated, stuck in a line for a couple of days now. FUCCCCCCCCCCK! WEEKEND ALSO F@#KED1
-
Reading devRant and new job postings is leaving me with less time to write any code in this shit hole.
-
Seriously, do people at apple think Xcode (Which is short for shit code) is any good? Man, I've wasted days now fixing bugs that make zero sense!4
-
Arrrrgh Fuck this shit. I thought debugging someone's code was fucked up. I was wrong, try debugging someone's unit tests.... Absolute nightmare
-
When Groovy have a documentation page about Java interoperability, but you don't give a shit and with a simply copy-paste from Java the code works1
-
Got a full stack job in a really large org. They write shit code and refuse to comment on code saying the code should explain itself.
And I’m like yeah but if you’re writing spaghetti code at least fucking comment why.
The new job’s pay is like 2x my old job so it’s really fucking good pay but my brain is melting from frustrations with these devs.4 -
I guess i have to be thankful for not knowing whomever wrote this fucking piece of shit of a PHP app that i have to fix stupid bugs in a daily basis.
Cause if i did know the bastard.. i'm pretty sure i would fucking bash his useless head in with anything i had in my hands at the moment... FUCK!.
The level of ignorance and stupidity.. i can't even begin to comprehend.
The worst is that we can't even rewrite this fucking piece of buggy shit cause the bosses are so fucking proud of their deformed creation and wont pay us decently to even to that in the first place.2 -
Honestly, am I the same guy who wrote this code 4 years ago? How comes I never commented it! Shit man. What do you do with code that works just fine but you don't know how it works..???2
-
Code review time.
"How come this line has been removed? PEP 8 likes to have two lines between imports and the first bit of code"
What I replied: Thanks. I'll put it back.
What I wanted to reply: Go fuck yourself you anal moron, who the fuck gives a shit about bollocks like that. We got fucking proper work to do, so get the fuck over yourself, let the fucking PEP shit lie, and make some fucking USEFUL comments.5 -
This bit of code I wrote made me outwardly laugh. I'm losing my mind over here, and my team will look down on me and the stupid shit I'm doing.6
-
Shit. Today I had to code some required Migration Script for a Client. Deadline tomorrow.
It's nearly finished. But the Last thing isn't working correct.
I'll try to find the bug when I am at Home.
Yeah. I hope I Can find it.
But.. but. The FUCKING TRAIN WAS CANCELLED. SHIT! I have to find the bug you piece of Shit!2 -
!rant
Debugged the shit of a customer issue.
I feel great, it has been a while since I had fun/frustration with code. -
Behold, the code submitted by user Hecker:
(Quote) > writing html like a pro:
from typing import List
class MissmatchedRowsAndCols(Exception):
pass
class HtmlTableBuilder:
classes: List[str] = []
identifier: str = ""
rows: List[str] = []
cols: List[list] = []
def add_row(self, name: str):
self.rows.append(name)
return self
def add_col(self, fields: list):
if len(self.rows) != len(fields):
raise MissmatchedRowsAndCols(
"The given fields are not matched 1:1 with the rows.")
self.cols.append(fields)
return self
def build(self, indent: int = 4) -> str:
html = "<table border=\"2px\""
if len(self.identifier) > 0:
html += ' id="' + self.identifier + '"'
if len(self.classes) > 0:
html += ' class"' + (" ".join(self.classes)) + '"'
html += ">\n"
html += (" "*indent) + "<thead>\n"
for row in self.rows:
html += (" "*(indent*2)) + "<th>" + row + "</th>\n"
html += (" "*indent) + "</thead>\n"
html += (" "*indent) + "<tbody>\n"
for col in self.cols:
html += (" "*(indent*2)) + "<tr>\n"
for field in col:
html += (" "*(indent*3)) + "<td>\n"
html += (" "*(indent*4)) + str(field) + "\n"
html += (" "*(indent*3)) + "</td>\n"
html += (" "*(indent*2)) + "</tr>\n"
html += (" "*indent) + "</tbody>\n"
html += "</table>"
return html
builder = HtmlTableBuilder()
builder.add_row("index").add_row("language")
builder.add_col([0, "Python"]).add_col([1, "Kotlin"])
print(builder.build())6 -
Looking back at the VBA code I wrote for work about 10 months ago makes me realize how much reading the Clean Code book by Robert C. Martin did for me, because holy shit my old code is unreadable...2
-
Holy shit, writing code is fun again. Isn't it nice when things actually work for a change, and you can focus on code quality and improvements?
Hard work pays off. -
`Holy shit never turn on caught exception breakpoints in vs code for node !
and the one place i need the damn code to break, it doesn't break !1 -
Why humankind why? People changing my code, commit without testing and QA is complaining cause the shit isn't working.2
-
Yes, actually, I will complain that the code I inherited is shit and then proceed to not refactor it2
-
Shit is when u write code and dnt recall why u wrote certain lines a few hours later n when u remove them, u get in the shitter2
-
People that approve pull requests without looking at them!
No tests or so bad they would do more use by not existing, typos, the code follows none of the design practices and the code obviously will not compile and thereby breaks builds in trunk for everyone.
Because of course they only asked one person to review it and then merged it immediately. -
The biggest drawback to QObject is you cannot template a class that inherits from QObject. It is an fucking pain in the ass. I have more work arounds and boiler plate because of that crap. I end up with code that if I find in the wild I would say: "wtf is this shit?" I end up composing stuff just to make it work together without coupling too hard. I guess if it works it works. If one of you cunts ends up working on this code I will apologize right now. But I won't be sorry one bit.1
-
Which type of clients you preferred?
A) Technical ( who know how to code )
B) Non Technical ( who dont know shit about code)4 -
Man people posting video of them copying code from code pen and say it’s their most creative login form so far
Like you can say today I’m gonna show you some code I found, but saying it’s your own code is just pure dumb, you are not that creative, you are dog shit1 -
Going through code of a bluespec verilog core
This language is some jungle shit !!
is there any intuitive HDL exists or it’s just a myth3 -
Facing some down - simultaneously somehow as dev and privately.
The dev part partly triggered by another burning project. Our team deep in shit up to the chin... And this unanswerable question: who is to blame? Everyone is working up their arses, but the result is still some sparkling firework ship wreck, that only held together for the demo to the board. It's not that we are stupid or lazy, yet we push some unmaintainable spaghetti, because this shit just gotta work.
Dunno, somehow this object orientation / pattern ideologies were also kind of depressing to me: partly because they smell like attempt to enlighten the inept by stupid receipts - and of course then deep down there's this nagging question if I'm not one of this inept not knowing the newest fashion template from the catalogue..
Then this Clean Code - Craftsmanship shit is bugging me similarly. Liked Robert C. Martin's book, but now I picked up some "Clean C++" and.. I kinda feel dumbed down if they try to sell the KISS principle to a 36 year-old physicist/engineer. Good for them that all our legacy shit und own fuck ups nourish this whole industry of well-meaning advisers. Argh, just fuck it, you priests, sell your obvious calendar mottos elsewhere, they are are just as useful as telling a griever that "rain follows sunshine". - As if they would not some time use the raw pointer that their coworker gave 'em, to ship shit tomorrow? -
Whenever I see example code produced or shown by Microsoft, it either
1) looks like some WinForms anno 2009 shit, or
2) a horrible implementation of obfuscated code jizz. -
Wat Do you Do When you produce shit Code and a coworker is angry on you because He needs to work with it and fix everything you messed up?1
-
idk why but personal project code gives me more OCD triggers than work project code.
Can't code for myself anymore. My OCD kicks in and makes me wanna throw up when I look at the shit I coded last week for my pet project.3 -
Got a new user story for code refactoring of my previous stories.To motivate myself i am trying to think like
" it's much better to clean my own shit then others." -
Fucking code!
Shit, Symfony.
I had trouble creating a bundle. It's necessary to install composer!
Finally, I succeeded!