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Search - "i need them all"
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Boss: “Our YouTube channel doesn’t look at all like our website.”
Me: “I’ve made it look as close to our branding as YouTube allows for with its limited editing controls.”
Boss: “This is unacceptable. I expected more from you.”
Me: “I cannot accept the blame for this. YouTube is setting the design parameters for all channels and I can only do so much.”
Boss: “You can call the YouTube, can’t you? Why didn’t you call them?”
Me: “.......and ask them....what?”
Boss: “You don’t ask! You tell! Our company has been around for 140 years. Our brand name carries that weight. They’ll change their design to what we need if you’re assertive enough.”
Me: “Ma’am, that’s just not how this works. That’s not how any of this works.”50 -
Parents: When your child spends a lot of time with the PC and doesn't want to interact with you, you have some reflection to do before you turn off the internet and nag them for things all day. Chances are, they don't like being with you but don't want to say it, either, because of the kind of things they know you will say and think if they do it.
And for the love of everything that is holy, do NOT turn the internet off! That pisses them off even more!
Maybe I'd have told you how much I hate being forced to be with you if it didn't mean I'd get guilt tripped about it.
Being around the people who pretend that you are a fucking machine that only needs material things in life and does not at all need emotional support at least in the early parts of your life and deflecting every legit argument for the things you stand for with "Muh Feelingz" makes them seem even more pathetic than they are. They manage to be an inspiration to everyone who doesn't know them, yet fail to be the persons their children have any respect for.
It's as if children never imitate their surroundings at all...10 -
A tcp packet walks in to a bar and says “I want a beer”, barman says “you want a beer?” and tcp packet says “yes, a beer” .
In high society, TCP is more welcome than UDP. At least it knows a proper handshake.
A bunch of TCP packets go into a bar, until it’s overcrowded. The next day, half as many go in.
A bunch of TCP packets walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Hang on just a second, I need to close the window.”
When I try to send SYNs to chicks, I don’t get any ACKs. Just FINs and RSTs.
IP packet with TTL=1 arrives at bar. Bartender: “Sorry, can’t let you leave…and you don’t get any beer either…”
The worst part about token ring jokes is that if someone starts telling one while you are telling yours, all joking stops.
The great thing about TCP jokes is that you always get them.
The problem with TCP jokes is that people keep retelling them slower until you get them.
I would tell some UDP jokes too but I never know if anyone gets them
The best thing about UDP jokes is that I don’t care if you get them or not.
I had a funny UDP joke to tell, but I lost it somewhere...
The sad thing about IPv6 jokes is that almost no one understands them and no one is using them yet.
I tried to come up with an IPv4 joke, but the good ones were all already exhausted.
A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer. Bartender says: “here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!
DHCP jokes only work when there is only one person telling them
The worst part of SSH jokes is that, even when they're not funny, you suck it up and just pretend they were anyway.
The problem with token ring jokes is you need to wait your turn to laugh
I’d make a joke about UDP, but I don’t know if anyone’s actually listening…11 -
Had three servers running in prod. For extra security all of them were encrypted (hdd encryption) just in case.
"mate, servers need a quick reboot, that alright?"
Me: yeah sure!
"oh hey they're encrypted, what's the password?"
Uhm.....
😐
😓
😨
😵😨😮😧😫
😲😶😭
Yeah, i also forgot to turn on the backup process...17 -
Someones keyboard just stopped working in my job.
They called the helpdesk and i told them to unplug the keyboard from the back of the PC and try a different usb port before i send them down a new keyboard.
Their reply?
‘How am i meant to do that? I mean... *laughs* I didn’t go to college for this kind of stuff. I know you did but you need to explain it in English for me instead of using technical terms.’
....
So i had to describe what a USB looks like, and tell her how to follow the (only) skinny black cable she has on her desk, down the back of the desk and into the PC. She got overwhelmed by this cable being the same colour as the thicker VGA cable, so ended up unplugging everything!
Its fine though, as when she plugged them all back in, everything was back working.
She finished the call by saying:
“Like, i know how to use a computer but I just don’t understand all this technical mumbo jumbo, like USB’s and stuff? How should i know about that?”
...
I sincerely think interviews need to have just 5 minutes dedicated to the person showing that they know what a bloody USB is!!, can turn on/off a PC, open outlook, and follow basic instructions.
Ugh I work with idiots 😢17 -
I grinded out 8k lines of code in four weeks, but don't consiter myself a programmer.
I can sit down at a computer and in under five minutes have all of the passwords saved to a USB, and the OS is rendered unusable, but I don't consiter myself a hacker.
I can make great high quality artwork, but don't call myself an artist.
I got 2k ++ in 16 days, but have yet to order my stickers because I don't feel like i've earned them.
But most impressively of all, I can fool everyone around me into thinking I'm happy. Even though I'm unsure I can even feel it.
..Bit of a darker rant, but some things need to be said.67 -
Part of my job involves speaking with users on the phone and I really don’t mind it except for THESE PEOPLE:
Me: Hi! XYZ Co. this is Tawzer!
Them: Hi Tawzer this is blah blah I need help with the website I just can’t figure it out!
Me: Okay! Let me ju-
Them: Yeah you know I’ve been struggling for hours with it I really don’t have time for this.
Me: Oh I imagine! What’s your-
Them: Well I was gonna try and get everything done today by 3 but with all of this tech stuff going wrong I just don’t know...
Me: That sounds frustrating, can i get your-
Them: Is this going to take long??
Me: Nope! I just need to know your-
Them: like I said I just really don’t have time for this!
Me: ........ What’s your-
Them: well I-
Me: WHAT’S YOUR USERNAME
Them: Uh I don’t know can you look me up? I didn’t know I’d need that.
Me: 👩🏻💻10 -
Last week, I notified a customer about that their webbserver spewed out several thousands of spam emails every hour, and they have to fix it ASAP.
(I also inform them for the 50th times for the last 2 years that they really need to update their websites so we can update from Debian 5).
The owner of the company forward this to their developers.
Today, I got the answer from them denying everything and blaming our "negligence" and they also dared to question all our technical expertise. shots fired
Spend some hours, finding shit on their websites, dug out logs, read documentation and old conversation and compiled that into a huge email that was designed to put them 10 meters under ground.
mfw I pressed send15 -
Client : your design is not cool. See this ^
*showed me some pretty neat designs pattern*
Me: which type do you want for your application.?
Client : All are pretty cool. Isn't it?
Me : Yes. But you do not need all of them. Right?
Client : Yes.
Me : So, which one.
Client : I'm confused But, this will do.
Me : Sure?
Client : Yes, very much.
After 3 days.
Client : you know what, earlier one was simple one but, best one. Easy to understand. This is (new design) making it complex. I need previous one.
Me : (I knew you'll say that, a**hole.) Just go to setting and select theme section to earlier version.
Client : thank you man.
Me : (You are red listed in my book you a**hole. Say anything else to add/edit and then see.) You are welcome.6 -
Working with a radio chip we selected because it had built-in encryption. Cannot make the encryption work, thus in contact with the manufacturer:
"- I cannot make the encryption work, it's like the chip doesn't want to take a key.
- which key do you use?
- does it matter?
- well yes, you can't just use any key!
- why not?
- you need to get an approved key from us.
- why is that?
- so that your competitors can't read your data!
- ...
- ...
- so the way to get working keys is to get them from you?
- of course!
- keys are 256 bits. Can we potentially use all of them?
- OF COURSE NOT!
- how many can we get from you?
- one! We reserve it from your company.
- are you telling me that all units within a company will need to have the exact same encryption key?
- yes!
- so anyone with our product could eavesdrop another same product?
- well yes, but it's all within your own products.
- ...
- ...
- that's not how encryption is supposed to work.
- but it's safe, your competitors cannot eavesdrop!
- I'm out of here."
(We finally found a satisfactory work-around, but i am still pissed at them)9 -
Manager: The site I loading too slow. How can we improve this?
Me: *f5 & look at the network log* the server is taking too long to respond some image requests. We could encode them into the Html to have them all delivered in a single request.
Manager: GTMetrix says we need to compress the images.
Me: *reads GTMetrix report* we would only have a 150kb improvement. It won't even be noticeable.
Manager: If the images take a long time to load, it means that they're too big, right?
Me: or the server is taking a long time to respond our request for them, which is the case.
Manager: compress the images and upload them.
Me: *compresses the images and uploads them* done.
Manager: I don't see any improvement.
Me: if only there was someone who could have predicted such an outcome...1 -
Private chat pops up. (- separator for new message)
Hello
- (1 min)
Can you help me?
- (2-3 mins)
Please it's urgeeeent!!!!!
- (1 min)
Come on you're online, I see the green dot.
- (5 mins)
Ok then I won't be able to work. Will write this down in the ticket.
- (15 mins) - new private chat pops up
Hi, we need to talk.
- (3 mins)
Regarding ticket XY, why aren't you responding? It's really urgent.
- (5 mins)
Please notify me as soon as you're available, it's really important!!!
- (20 mins, new private chat opens)
Hi mate, I think the devs are up to mischief. Said you're not reachable, I'll try to poke them with the stun gun.
- (60 mins, message in the official and only endorsed support room)
@all We broke staging, <Me> never responds and <Team mate who tried to use the stun gun> wasn't helpful either.
We really need this now!!!!!!!
- 30 mins later... la me:
@all I was in a meeting with the stakeholders as we had an priority meeting... What was so important that you not only ignored the rule of not messaging privately and even ignored <team mate>s instructions?
- 5 mins later, answer
no need to be so unfriendly.... We broke staging as we had to test stuff out for next week's sprint review [something which is still 3 days away or sth like that]. We really need to take a look in the team at it and for that we must have staging working now!!!!
- (La me)
If you need it urgent now, you didn't plan ahead. And if you didn't plan ahead, you have to wait for others. The sprint review and all other important days are planned ahead for a reason.
- (Silence)
- (20 mins later, private chat, team lead)
Will you finally fix staging now?
- La me
If it could wait 3 hours now and you / your team ignored all netiquette, it can wait till next day, too. We had this discussion more than once, I don't think I need to explain this further.
(Silence)
All in all, the joys of communication...
Now the fun stuff is when this not only happens with 1 team, but many teams....
Having 35 - 40 private chats and chat window looking like a christmas tree thx to the immeasurable amount of notifications and colors... Yay...
Did I mention that I hate the ego some programmers have -.10 -
My dream is to build a shopping cart for web stores that doesn't fucking suck.
Seriously Bigcommerce, Shopify, Magneto, etc. All of you can eat bag of dicks and burn in hell for ever.
I don't care what languages you fancy, all of their stacks are a pile of shit, monkey patched together with popsicle sticks and duct tape and it all falls apart with high concurrency.
All their greasy haired sales teams will throw all manners of horse shit at the poor bastards who are trying to run a business so they can pad their commission checks... "High availability", "scalable", "reliable", "Increased conversation rate"... Lying dick fucks, all of them! I am calling them the fuck out on that snake oil they're all peddling.
The only thing worse than their shit APIs is the shit documentation and the shit support that accompanies them.
Support of these platforms are pretty much all the same, sure mayhaps one has 24*7 phone support and another closes at 9 or some shit like that, either way the only people they put on the phone are monkeys that will freeze up and say "I'm not a developer so I can't help you"... Guess what, "Eric"! I didn't ask if you're a fucking dev! I'm calling because one of your devs fucked up and I need you to tell him to unfuck it so I can get the fuck on with my day!
Their app/plugin market places are shameful to say the least. The overall quality of software is somewhat dire and it's mostly dominated by oversees developers who speak English about as well as the language they're developing with (not very well usually).
I could go on until I hit the character limit but I'm gonna end it here by saying, all shopping carts suck and they should burn for eternity in the depths of hell so that a savior can free all developers from this agonizing torment.9 -
Them: Root, you take too long to get tickets out. You only have a few simple ones. You really need to rebuild your reputation.
Also them: Hey, could you revisit this ticket? Could you help ____ with this other ticket? Hey Root, how do you do this? Root, someone had a suggestion on one of your tickets; could you implement that by EoD? Hey Root, i didn't read your ticket notes; how do you test it? Hey, could you revisit this ticket for the fourth time and remove some whitespace? Hey Root, someone has non-blocking code review comments you need to address before we can release the ticket. Hey Root, we want to expand that ticket scope by 5-6 times; still labeled a trivial feature though.
Also them: Super easy ticket for you. Make sure you talk with teams A, B, C, D, E and get their input on the ticket, talk with ____ and ____ and ____ about it, find a solution that makes them all happy and solves the problem too, then be sure to demo it with everyone afterward. Super easy; shouldn't take you more than a couple days. Oh, and half of them are on vacation.
Also them: Hey, that high-priority ticket you finished months ago that we ignored? Yeah, you need to rewrite it by tomorrow. Also, you need to demo it with our guy in India, who's also on vacation. Yes, tomorrow is the last day. (The next day:) You rewrote it, but weren't able to schedule the demo? Now you've missed the release! It's even later! This reflects very poorly on you.
Also them: Perfect is the enemy of good; be more like the seniors who release partially-broken code quickly.
Also them: Here's an non-trivial extreme edgecase you might not have covered. Oh, it would have taken too much time and that's why you didn't do it? Jeez, how can you release such incomplete code?
Also them: Yeah, that ticket sat in code review for five months because we didn't know it was high-priority, despite you telling us. It's still kinda your fault, though.
Also them: You need to analyze traffic data to find patterns and figure out why this problem is happening. I know you pushed the fix for it 8 months ago, and I said it was really solid, but the code is too complex so I won't release it. Yeah I know it's just a debounce with status polling and retrying. Too complex for me to understand. Figure out what the problem is, see if another company has this same problem, and how they fixed it.
-------------
Yep. I'm so terrible for not getting these tickets out, like wow. Worst dev ever. Much shame.
LF work, PST.13 -
Paypal Rant #3
One day I'll go to Paypal HQ and...
... change all the toilet rolls to face the wrong way
... remap all the semicolons to be the Greek equivalent character
... change all the door signs so they say "pull" instead of "push" and vice versa
... modify all the stairs to have variable heights
... programmatically shuffle the elevator buttons and randomly assign the alarm key to any of the most visited floors
... pour cocoa onto all the keyboards and wipe them off cleanly
... attach clear duct tape over their mouse sensors and insert really weak batteries or mess with their cables
I'll wait a day or two until they experience a sudden shortage of developers, then bombard them with thousands of fake applications from seemingly amazing candidates, then write an AI bot to continue argumentation with HR.
I'll wait another week or so until the company dissolves and with them, all my issues in life.
No need to be overly vulgar this time because you all know the deal. I hate this fucking company. Please Paypal do us all a favor and go fuck yourself.9 -
rant;
WHY DO PEOPLE DELETE STACKOVERFLOW QUESTIONS WHERE I AWNSERED THEM IN DETAIL WHAT TO DO AND WHY IT BEHAVES IN THE WAY IT DOES. THIS SHIT JUST WASTED MY TIME AND DOES NOT BENEFIT ANY USER WITH A SIMILAR ISSUE. THESE FUCKERS NEED TO GET THEIR EGOMANIAC SHIT TOGETHER IT IS NOT ALL ABOUT THEM AND STACKOVERFLOW IS NOT A FUCKING FREE OUTSOURCING COMPANY.
tl;dr don't awnser people on stackoverflow if they don't mark their past questions as awnered. It is a waste of time.8 -
Client: We need this site up and running by the end of the month.
Me: Ok we need them to send creative over. Please provide it in Photoshop format.
.... A few days before due date.
Client: We have sent you all the creative. Please see email attachment.
...... Opens attachment. Creative was created in PowerPoint.
FML!! I CANNOT BELIEVE!!!
*starts twitching*5 -
German gov contractor interview.
1 interview went fine, test project went fine, then they told me all looks good and they'll fly me in so I can meet HR in person.
Flew up to Germany and there are solution architects and project managers in the room questioning me about C++ although it was about a java position.
Then told me that I'm no fit for them as their java devs need to be rock solid in C++ to make communication between departments easier. What the...8 -
got a mail 10 minutes after I finished a 10h shift that my contract won't be refreshed after 4 years ripping my ass off for this fucked up organization. apparently not because of lack of competence but of personal reasons. that's what you get for not being a sheep and having an opinion. my (ex)boss didn't even have the balls to say it to my face.
fuck them! I don't need people like that around me - neither in my spare time nor at work - and I wish them all the worst.
happy holidays motherfuckers!5 -
Manager: IT and I have decided that you will not be doing any rewriting of the legacy code. We paid a lot of money for it and throwing it away would be impossible. Instead you will create a “config file” that will customize the legacy code behaviour to whatever spec we need. IT said this would be possible and would be a very simple way of operating everything going forward. That way no future code needs to be written or maintained, it’s just a matter of changing this “config file” to match our needs.
Dev: Nobody in IT codes though.
Manager: Yes but they work with config files all the time. If you need to be shown how they work just ask them.
Dev: I know how they work it ju—
Manager: Good!! So that should speed things up quite a bit. See this is why developers need managers.18 -
Alright, the blog seems to be running again and its not breaking yet which is a good sign :P.
Although nothing has changed on the front end yet, the backend has been partly rewritten to be more efficient and of course, post sorting based on posting date!
I'm aware of most of the front end issues so no need to tell me all of them again, I'll look at that tomorrow as I need sleep right now :(
If you'd find any bugs/security issues, please, don't exploit them but report them instead! I take security very seriously and will try to patch any security bug as soon as I can :)13 -
I automated the process of downloading songs from YouTube and transferring them to my phone.
This is how it works, very simple:
- I have a youtube playlist in which I add songs that I'd like to download
- When I run my python script, it parses my playlist and checks to see if I have added any new songs that aren't already downloaded
- Uses a library to download MP3 for all the songs I want to download
- Transfers all those MP3 files to a designated folder that is tracked by Google Music manager
- Google Music manager syncs those songs to my phone and downloads them for offline playback
That's it 😎 No need for YouTube Red
I'm going to run this script 24x7 on a Raspberry Pi, so everytime I add a new song to the playlist, script starts it's job without me running the script manually.13 -
Not really a bug, but once I tried to learn building function ajax per table asynchronously instead of calling all of them at once. Spend like couple of hours of trial of error. It wasn’t needed at the time, but suddenly I need to fetch something separately because of a new feature. Just write a couple and line it’s done
-
I'm freelancing and there was a guy who needed help with JavaFX. He gave me code only to his view class so I don't steal the rest... It was around 5k lines and it was full of compilation errors because of missing classes. While checking the code I realised something is really wrong with his model classes. So I asked maybe he could send me this one model class that was suspicious. So he did and it was around 10k lines long and had around 200 fields... ALL OF THEM FUCKING STRINGS except 3. You know what the rest of 3 were? 2 Lists of strings and a boolean... It was his "main" model class, he was using it for everything. It had setters for all fields and empty default constructor, so he would just instantiate the object and would set the fields that he wanted to use. Need new functionality? Just add 5more String fields and set them!2
-
From my last job interview (which I got hired btw)
Lead developer: "so we see quite a lot of frameworks that you listed for php, Laravel,cakephp, codeigniter, we really like the idea of them but have not had the opportunity to use them since as you might know by know our pages run over basic and small scripts, you also listed some cool front end frameworks, react looks amazing and I do have somr experience. Tell me, if given the choice, which framework would you use for php?"
Me: Really depends on the project, but the ones that you have described previously seem that they would not really benefit from them, we should not use them if they are overkill or will not expand to anything else on the future"
Him: "But given the choice?"
Me: my own framework, completed it a couple of days ago, it has its own routing system and everything made by yours truly, used it before on some projects in which the developers work with it with no need to ask me about stuff, the documentation is sound and the code rather simple. Php is and can really be all you need depending on what we are talking about."
Him: **stands up, moves closer to me and fist bumps**
"All right now moving on, i was wondering abouy redux, what are the benefits of..."
Walked out of there like a boss, it got interesting when we started talking about Lisp, apparently they are interested in putting some Clojure to test in small things since they want to learn new things and apply them. Yup, this gon b good!!4 -
I just told my biggest client that they have to start changing things or they will need to find a different company to work with.
I'm hired to program what they want. They are suppossed to do all the concepting, functional designs, QA, testing.
So they tell me to program feature x, not realising that this interact with feature y. And then complain about the change in feature y. Make me do a lot of extra work and then complain that my estimates are way off.
So I told them they also need to hire my company for the software design and QA and prefferable testing because I'm done getting blamed.9 -
Yea... so you know all those rants/jokes about how you need to explain programming to ur friends and family?
I just realized I don't have that problem.... all of them are programmers as well :)8 -
Coworker: Hey, you made some changes over here in module X?
Me: Yeah. The old way was deprecated and we need to switch all of our modules over to the new way.
Coworker: Okay. I'm working in module Y now. When are you going to get to it and make those changes?
Me: ... I sent out an email and a message in group chat saying we all need to make these changes as we find them.
Coworker: Uh-huh. So when are you going to update this? It's blocking me.3 -
I'd like to tell a story about a friend I once knew. She was good at her job, but only her job. People loved her so much, but when the people got interested in things other than her job, they took her with them. She was forced to do things she couldn't do as well, and all because people couldn't change. She feels overused, overworked, and she still tries to keep her head up. People need to stop using her.
#KeepJavaScriptOnTheWeb5 -
Broken app is broken again. This app is broken so often and so hard, I'm struggling to give a damn.
These fuckers need to take their shitty project, code and managers especially, and launch them into Mars
They blame us and everyone else for their shit and I'm done with it. I need to sleep and not have these fools call me at all fucking hours.6 -
Until now I've never thought of putting stickers on my laptop. Always preferred it to be clean, but with all those cool stickers on all your laptops... It made me wanna put as many stickers as possible and since devRant stickers looked lonely, I've decided to print some of my own. On other side I wantedthem to be useful for me so I grabbed a handful of NFC stickers and designed links and required shortcuts for my phones to run with them on touch. for example if I need a hotspot on my mobile to be activated quickly, I just put my phone against the WIFI sticker and bingo! And yes, devRant logo opens devRant app))5
-
I suddenly realized all the technical debt shit I told my boss would happen years ago given the way things were done/heading then... Just occurred pretty much all at once last week in the form of critical production issues...
The teams like:
-we need real time server process monitoring
-structured logging for apps
-containerization so one app didn't affect others
Me thinking: yes.... I told you so like 3/4 years ago when I first joined the team and kept repeating so much I got tired of saying at every annual review...
This is exactly what happens when you let technical debt grow and have no free time for developers to look into and fix then while they were small and not critical production processes... Or properly document and peer review them... (Got a shit pile of projects that no one knows how to use or even exists because the devs left the team) and they'll have a lot more when I finally leave... Hopefully this year.... If I can find another role and not need another medical procedure... (Doubtful)3 -
It is time. I have to admit it.
I don't understand Git.
I just memorized some basic commands: git commit, git push, git push -u origin master, git clone, git checkout [-B], git merge. That's it, that's the full list. I use them like they're some kind of magic spells that do what I need. Everything else, those intricacies like rebasing, resetting, HEAD and all that shit, is beyond me.
I'm not a real programmer. Real programmers know Git.30 -
Please disregard. I just need to vent.
Being a manager is so fucking shit. This is not even about devs or tech specific only. Never become a manager.
Why? Because it’s about handling people and all the dumb shit they do. It’s all about knowing what people suck at and preventing that weakness from leaking into other areas. The amount of fucked up people on this earth means that you have to work with at least some of them, and that means putting up with their stupid ass list of super special requirements, that if they do not fulfill, will make them a shit worker. It’s not even an issue of technical skills.
You have the guys that are often late, because “they have depression”, but will complain that “companies don’t treat employees like adults”. Being on time for work is apparently very difficult. Which doesn’t generally matter in general for dev work, but it ends up affecting other things.
You have the completely socially inept idiots that make half the team hate them and try to avoid working with them, increasing problems and work for other people. Just because they’re socially stupid, have low or no empathy, or are incapable of not being insufferable to others.
You have the people that are so bad at estimating that they keep making up numbers instead of waiting to think for a few minutes and say “ not sure, I need to research and estimate that”.
You have the surprise absentee for dumb as fuck reasons like “my phone died lol sorry”. They never do anything to actually improve, it is just “sorry guys! Btw I will do jackshit about this”.
Or the ones whining about virtually everything, all the time. Wtf why do I have to be on scrum at 12 tomorrow?! Wtf why do I have to record the result of that customer call? Wtf why should I talk with XYZ?
And if you leave them alone, everything burns. They actually need someone to tell them “hey mate you need to improve that, shall we plan something to do so?”. I think managers are useless and unneeded when you have adults working, but it seems like most of the population is composed of children. It’s basically another form of daycare.
And you have to prepare shit around all of these constraints.
Then you have the one guy that reads the requirements, has common sense, and is inoffensive and can work like a normal adult human that needs no baby sitting. A ray of light on this shitshow.
I just want to go back to pure dev.22 -
Yes, it is dumb that airports, stores, and hospitals run very outdated software, but imagine how hard it would be to upgrade all those machines, especially considering the programs that might not work well with never operating systems and the fact that staff would have to be trained all over again. Not to mention, most of these businesses and services can't afford any downtime and need to make sure that everything is compatible (so, update one PC, you have to update all of them). In theory, I am still a fan of updated systems, but then again, I have a 10 year old XP installation at home, which I've been preparing to reinstall for a year or so (don't really use that PC, but still)7
-
Welp, fuck that shit.
The boss just called me to tell me d good news that they won't need me anymore...
I made them 1 project for about a year ( + fixing/updating few other projects )
... and that apparently is all they need for now and r gonna back to IT crowd ( read this as 2 ppl IT department )
was fun =]2 -
I manage a team of engineers.
Toxic Culture Post #2:
Manager: Everybody on your team needs their own swimlane in Jira. Each person's work should be their own lane. When I have a ticket for <Project A> I want to make sure that <Bob> always gets it, all tickets for <Project B> must go to <James>. You'll need to figure out which team member will handle <New Project C> and create their personal swim lane.
Me: That's not really how SCRUM works. Actually, that's not how teamwork works. You're creating silos and we all need to learn how to do these tasks. We're a cross-functional team, and each team member brings their own unique talents to the whole process.
Manager: So you'll create the swimlanes?
Me: No
Manager (to Bob): You'll be devoted to <Project A> from now own. It's the only work I expect you to do. All work for that project will be yours.
Likewise, my manager also reached out to each team member and assigned them specific tasks, furthering the silos.6 -
I rewrote my static website generation from jekyll to custom python code over single night.
Literally all jekyll plugins I use including seo, rss, syntax highlighting inside markdown content, sitemap, social plugins, css sass, all of it.
Now it’s around 400 lines of python code that I understand completely. I didn’t touch any existing templates and after comparing output I got even better results now and it’s working faster.
I skipped drafts as I don’t need them now.
Why ? Cause now I can make better generator for my side projects that can include some partial website generation, better modification and date handling, tree structure, etc.
What I will do now is that I will parse bunch of content to create markdown files that will be sucked by this generator to create static web pages that will flood internet lol.
Still I didn’t believe it was possible to rewrite all of it so quickly. I sit yesterday around 4pm and finished around 6am.
I started thinking that maybe I am crazy and no one can help me.9 -
So my parents got speakers integrated into their monitor. A few years ago (like 3-4) they made me turn off the sound because it annoyed them since all they did were playing some shitty flash games and some office work. Now they needed the sound back on and this is how it happened.
1. Confirm they plugged the right cable in. I know them so I knew that could be a problem
2. Made them download Teamviewer because I know they can't even doubleclick without guidance
Now the juicy part was to tell them they need to turn on sound on the monitor. As I was watching via teamviewer I saw them trying to click on the menu items from said monitor. Took me 5 minutes to explain that their mouse can't do shit on that because they need to navigate with the buttons underneath the monitor.
Turned out they couldnt get things right and I had no idea what they were seeing because they explanations went like "All I can see is Main Menu and Exit." - "Is that really all dad?" "Yes thats all. Main Menu, Brightness and Exit" turnes out the middle part is interchangable like "Brightness, Saturation, etc..."
After 2 hours I gave up and told them to pick up my speakers tomorrow -
Fuck this
I get to work with API where you CAN authenticate with username/password and get a token
But you CAN'T get user info from token (auth response contains ONLY token)
So what I have to do:
1. Get token
2. Request ALL FUCKING USERS and load them into my DB
3. Search through local DB by username and, yeah, here I go
Now I need to have a cron job to update user DB 1/2 times per day
I can't think of ANY reason not to allow this8 -
I'm a junior dev working with some very proprietary applications. The point is, I can't Google for code solutions at all.
The seniors are all very put upon and too busy to offer much actual help unless it's urgent.
I beg for assistance until I'm blue in the face and eventually stumble my way to something resembling the solution.
I get one of them to review my code, and while they do I point out all the places I STILL need help.
They don't answer any of those questions but damned if they don't have opinions on how my comments should be formatted.
Aaauuuuggghhhh5 -
- Back in October 2019 -
- Me: Hey, these two servers are having weird problems. Several services we use stop functioning every 7-10 days. I can temporarily fix them by taking them off the domain and putting them back on, but I don’t know why they’re happening or what further damage this workaround causes.
- Boss: Thats not good. Well. Keep doing the fix when it’s needed.
- Me: We should really reach out to someone at Microsoft through our support plan. I have no idea how to fix any of this and it’s making our Hyper-V environment very unstable.
- Boss: K. Let’s not worry about that now, let’s just keep working around it.
- In January 2020 -
- Me: Hey boss. More and more errors are generating from these servers. I’ve created a log of everything Ive found to hand off to a support agent. We really need to.
- Boss: Okay. Let’s talk to our internal team that uses Hyper-V and see what they did since they don’t have any problems.
- Me: Its not Hyper-V specific. It’s stemming from AD and authentication. It causes problems even without Hyper-V installed, so I don’t think it will help.
- Boss: K. Let’s just do what we can with what we got.
- Today, May 2020 -
- Me: Hey. The servers no longer work at all, and the workaround has no effect anymore. I’m completely stalled on my project now and have nothing to do.
- Boss: What?? What happened to them?
- Me: *Sends 17 page PDF file documenting all found issues, errors, warnings, and weird anomalies in both servers, as well as troubleshooting steps I’ve already performed*
- Boss: None of this makes any sense. I need you to start troubleshooting right away.
- Me: But... I can’t... *Sends screenshots of errors having no search results on the web, screenshots of Microsoft Support Techs on forums telling me we need to open tickets with Microsoft directly, other reasons why I’m completely blocked*
- Boss: Keep trying to figure it out. We need this resolved as soon as possible and we can’t let it happen again in the future.
Now I’m completely alone in our office, bitterly staring at the servers, trying to force an epiphany on how to fix these dumb boxes.5 -
Had to talk to another team to change 1 value in a database I didn't have access to. It should have taken 2 minutes but instead took them two hours. This was before they went on a public rant in front of the CTO and CEO telling my team how we need to re-architect everything we've done in the past 8 months because it didn't meet their personal standards.
I have never even met these people prior and all I needed was 1 fucking value changed. Somehow my company thinks this is culturally acceptable.6 -
Last week one of my clients asked me to visit their HQ to take a look at some report tool that has stopped to generate reports. This tool was not made by me, it has zero documentation, but WTH, I can take a look.
So I went to the HQ. When a guy that has called me told me that someone else will be here any second to talk to me, I began to be a little suspicius.
It turned out they want a new app. Not going into detail something that will read bar codes, do some stuff in a database, generate some reports etc. And he need it made in 2 weeks. I have reminded him I am involved in another project that I need to deliver in a month, and it is virutally impossible for me to develop what they want in this time. I offered them that maybe we should hire a team or at least another developer. Hi nodded and ignored what I've said. Well, he said we have maybe 2 weeks more, but that's it. Ok..
So, while working on the other project wich ramained a priority for me, I've began to do some thinking, some research on how to deliver what they want as fast as possible.
Today morning I went to the HQ again to finally take care of that report tool. But never mind that, I also had a chance to talk about the new app. So we made some Agile, wrote down epics, stories, talked about hardware etc. After two hours, it turned out, that more than this bardcode reading app the need something else! Barcode reading yes, but even more they need a scheduler for their emloyees, custom functionalities, plus some HR tools, other fancy stuff. But they don't even have a full concept yet. And it needs to be done until end of the month (9 days), maybe two weeks later.
So again I told them I will not be able to deliver this in set timeframe. That possibly we need to hire someone and even then it's questionable if this will be possible given all circumstances, time needed test, to deploy (in 14 diffrent locations all over the country). Actually if I had all software ready today the deployment, tests, training... So I offered that maybe we can figure out some temporary solution based on third party software.
At this point my requests and suggestions have been ignored again. Sadly my contract with them states I can not pass this to someone else, it all have to go trough them. And tehy don't want to spend extra money (??) etc.
Also from what I understand, this whole company's (~1000 employees) be or not to be can be affected by this project.
Sometimes I just don't understand business.1 -
Having to do database schema changes manually is HELL. Management seems to not be taking seriously enough the need to stop and implement migrations, my boss/lead dev suggested me to look up how to adopt/implement them in my own free time, instead of stopping all the feature implementing to do this VERY IMPORTANT, CRUCIAL CHANGE. Now I am the retard who takes too much time to do simple changes in the database.
Maybe I am retarded after all.7 -
Recruiter: I have an open position for lead DevSecOps role.
Me: Tell me more
Recruiter: It’s an AI company , where the AI is making clinical medical decisions. It’s really cool. They need somebody to help them pass government audits and you’d be solely responsible for the systems security, AWS accounts, and also all of DevOps, which they’ve never heard of before but I told them they needed and they though it was cool.
Also, they use AWS but not sure what services inside AWS, they think it’s AWS storage and AWS servers or something like that .
Me: That’s a big hell no. 👎 Got any other positions though ?9 -
Got a few Jira tickets reassigned to me because the dev who was supposed to work on them got stuck on another project. It's fine, that happens.
I open the tickets. No descriptions for all of them. No screenshots for those reported as bugs, nor any replication steps. No attached test cases or, well, ANY useful information.
I talk to our BA, he says that all information I need are in OTHER tickets on ANOTHER BOARD that business manages but I DON'T HAVE ACCESS TO. Honestly, these shitfucks could've just done simple copy/paste. But nooooo...
So I reassign all the tickets back to their original reporters (business testers) with comments requesting more information.
It's been a week. Now I have no idea what to put in my time sheet.1 -
So I decided to get a master degree at my capital city (I got my first degree from my small hometown), and decided to get a job as a junior developers. I tried for an easier job like starbucks or something but apparently all of them turn me down as soon as they asked “What major you graduated from ?”
Never though I would start a career in software developing. Any tips I need to know about this job? (I can actually code quite well and my class starts at night)2 -
useless fucking client bastards. i sent an email to all clients 2 months ago about gdpr and the impending deadline. Explaining that they need to update privacy and check webforms and internal procedures etc are compliant. I said I would help them implement any changes to their respective sites. Heard nothing from these fuckers... except this morning an email “what does the new gdpr mean for our website?”
FUCK OFF AND READ MY EMAIL, FOLLOW THE LINKS DO THE RESEARCH AND FUCKING SORT YOUR CUNTING SELVES OUT, I AM NOT YOUR FUCKING LAWYER.2 -
So I've been working on this website now for a while and I'm finally near the end.
The client suddenly writes to me to ask me why there is captcha on some of the forms (register, post). He asks me to remove all captchas.
I explained to him why captchas are important and I even told him one old story of mine (basically I was noob and made that fatal mistake and suffered).
His response is to remove them anyway he didn't like them.
My response?
I keep this conversation in text form and screenshots, and I keep backups of it.
I have a feeling I'll need them.6 -
Two things before this all:
- I fucking love gitlab so far
- I miss the fuzzy searching from sublime text, as vsCode still can't do it properly..
I was fed up with all the shitty overbloated git deployment scripts, sync scripts, automatic backup solutions and hosted git servers out there, so now my own solution is:
- remote git cloned local files
- local files are synced via dropbox, to easily edit them on any device
- all changes and deleted files are saved up to 1 year on dropbox
- remote has gitlab running and webhooks setup
- the webhooks point to my node scripts, which then rebase the code to its dedicated dev server
- daily server backup with 7 days roll
- cold storage backup each 30 days
Sounds like overkill, but from my experience, you really can't have enough places that have a backup, especially coldstorage backups.
My goal in general though is to have everything on my computer backupped and ready to go asap, if something happens.
I wanted to just use a virtual machine for development stuff, but that wouldnt be able to run on my laptop, so I need a more general solution, where I sync all configs and all projects across. (and have some sort of basic list of tools needed, so I dont need to remember them)
Found for example something for vscode to sync its settings and plugins via any sort of git, will give it a try in near future too.7 -
Unpopular opinion: I find most office gimmicks which have been popularized by FAANG companies are stupid.
I don’t care about pool tables/videogames/nerf guns, I find these things fun but I’m not 9 therefore I don’t need them at my workplace, I can take care of myself so I don’t need mindfulness seminaries, if I get interested by the topic I’m able to provide myself books or seminaries and don’t get me with the salary I get every month and don’t get me started about the trend of office dogs: most dogs needs a lot of attention and are high energy animals, that’s not what I would need around me when I’m making an urgent bug fix.
Luckily my company hasn’t got into this shit and understands which all an adult professional needs is “just” a good pay and a good work environment.4 -
Why THE FUCK is screen mirroring without being in the same wifi network a thing?
Why THE FUCK have all these smart tvs turned this on by default?
Why THE FUCK does the list of found devices SORT itself RANDOMLY if another device is found.
I probably mirrored my phone screen to a random tv in the neighbourhood because as soon as my finger was about to touch the name of my tv, a random tv swooshed into it's place.
WHAT THE FUCK THERE IS NO FUCKING NEED FOR THIS FEATURE IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY ACCESS POINT AROUND, THERE WILL BE ONE IN 99% OF ALL POSSIBLE USE CASES.
I mean if I got it right, i can share porn with my neighbors now, or at least annoy them?8 -
Was wondering when the stickers would come in when low and behold, my wife and I were packing up for a move and the stickers were just there in my sock/underwear drawer...
Confused as all hell I ask my wife, "Did you put these here?"
Turns out the letter arrived ages ago and she wanted to surprise me by opening it up and hide the stickers!
I mostly wear sandals so I had no need for socks and never moved them around to find the stickers underneath...
So here they are and thank you @dfox and @trogus for making this awesome community!!!devrant big thank you! _stickers arrived @trogus wife is a cruel prankster apparently forever ago @dfox6 -
I installed WhatsApp after 7.5 years.
My family forced me to do so because they make all the plans there and I am left out.
I am strictly using it for family and specifically for cousins while ignoring everyone else.
While the group is inactive except for when we all meet (which is once or twice a year).
I am also on Instagram which is 99% of the time deactivated and the only reason I have it is when I did my backpack, I met some real awesome people and the only way to stay in touch with them was via Instagram. Too bad that I did not have it then.
Yes, you can hate me for doing this. But I need to get this off my chest here. I am integrated with Meta ecosystem, but I am making sure I tread carefully and take all measures to protect myself from any kind of damage.11 -
"Hey boss, could you look over this reply to this support case before I send it? I just want to clarify a couple of things first."
"I haven't got the time to look over support case replies - you need to be proactive in deciding what's right, and then just sending them on."
"Ok, no worries."
5 minutes later...
"What the hell have you written on this support case? This isn't correct at all. Now they're going to be really confused. You've completely contradicted what I told them yesterday on the phone."2 -
It's sometimes good I work remotely from the rest of my team.... So other can't see how pissed I'm while chatting with them...
Just did an afternoon basically hand holding someone... And well this is the 3rd day... And the original instructions I gave them was: here's the problem, here the code fix, now you need to change it for the other 10 APIs it affects (OS migration).
I have another problem I need to figure out....
Yes I could do it all myself and it would be faster but I don't want to be the only person who can do this stuff either...
But can you just try to use your brain and figure things out before asking how to ....
I don't know am I that much more experienced than everyone else so I just know how to figure things out quickly, know to the learn efficiently? Ask the right questions to Google?
How hard is it to just learn to Google your problems... 80% of the questions u ask me I either tell you to Google it or actually end up googling the answer myself...2 -
So... after a vision test on a whim, it turned out I needed glasses.
Turns out sitting in front of a screen all day did actually mess my eyes up 😂
Luckily I only need them for using the computer for extended periods of time, so managed to run them through my company as an expense.14 -
You do know that "why do I need you if I can copy-paste code from SO?" joke floating around, right? Today I had a real-life situation perfectly illustrating it.
So I bought a set of parking sensors. Cheap ones, from AliExpress. Prolly the cheapest ones I could find. Installed them w/ engine turned off. All seemed fine. Cleaned it all up, got ready to go, started the engine and beeeep beeep beeepeeeeep beepp ..... beeeeeeeeep.
fuck.
Tried unplugging/replugging them one-by-one to find the faulty one. Nada. Apparently they all were false-alarming. They must all be bad, bcz they seem to work well w/ engine turned off (ignition on) and only false-alarm when engine is on.
Allright, I'll get a new set next weekend, a more expensive one and replace them again.
There goes my €20 and another week basically w/o parking sensors (car length is >5 meters, so sensors do help a lot).
Today I spend a few hours removing my rear bumper again, replacint all the sensors, wiring, etc. Tests show promising results - all sensors seem OK even w/ engine on! Close it all up, start a car again and.... beeep bep bep beeep beeee..eeeeppp.
MOTHER FUCK!
Another 30min-hour goes by while looking for a possible culprit. And I found it. The fix could did not take longer than 5 seconds. Apparently a wire feedint the sensors' controller was too close to sensors' wires. All I had to do is to push that wire a lil further from the controller with my index finger.
I could have saved €30, a week of time, half a day of work if I only knew what wire to [literally] poke.
shit...4 -
Inspired by @COD4's rant here: https://devrant.com/rants/3080528, I decided to go overboard a bit and catalogue (almost) all my unused Humble Bundle keys.
Given that there was well in excess of 300 of them I decided a more structured distribution mechanism was needed.
If you want to see if any are interesting for you, check the repository here: https://github.com/kwilliams1987/...
I have 5 more months of Humble Monthly to do still but need a break now...16 -
!rant
@dfox Does devRant have webhooks? I would like to start processing rants and performing analytics on them but I don't want to tax your servers by polling for them.
All I need is a trigger when a new rant is created.14 -
Helped a friend who's currently learning programming in Java
Looked at the slides used to teach them and apparently the teacher explains the "static" keyword as "can be accessed from any function of the class"... Which... Isn't at all what static does
At that point they hadn't started with actual OOP stuff, so I kind of get why they didn't explain what it really does, but why the fuck did they just put down a completely wrong definition?! Instead of just saying "yeah you'll just need that keyword for now, I'll explain it later"19 -
I wish my boss would stop revoking my permissions. He's always saying how these slew of things need to be accomplished, yet, everytime I go to do them I'm at a wall because, despite having permissions for a very long time he decided to revoke them entirely.
It's not like I can't be trusted with them, it's been over 2 years with them, so why the sudden revoke?
I finally sent some snot mail to him informing him I'm unable to complete my tasks without the permissions granted to me (I'm a sysadmin, sec guy, boss is vp of tech), and instead of him granting them yet again he's going to run around and try to hack around the permission requirement so he can avoid giving me them.
Seriously? This is stupid. I was the one who wrote the security design and implementation document, and put all that work in. Now I'm being locked out of the system I designed, built and implemented?
Well, time to look for a new job. If you're a manager, please don't revoke your employees permissions without notice, at random, and try to hack around well-documented security policies. It won't end well!3 -
Contact wants to discuss a list of projects with me next week.
What's the betting that these are unfunded ideas that need code?
I should just check by email, but it's been a while since anyone walked this path with me, so I'm up for some fun.
I see myself taking an advisory role in these projects for equity.
"First thing you need to do is obtain funding for them all. Then get back to me for my insights on next stage. Not sure how to get funding, but I'm not the the 'creative' side of the team."
Ideas aren't worth shit. I have a bunch every day and they are as worthless as yours.
Ideas without execution are like owning a book without reading it.3 -
I heard good things about Edge recently and thought that I should give it a try for a few days.
I’ve opened the same pdf file in multiple Edge windows and and tabs, each scrolled to a different page.
#1
The middle-mouse button scrolling is broken on half of the windows and tabs. You press the button, you see the scroll mouse curser. But it doesn’t scroll.
#2
Scrolling horizontally to an area which wasn’t visible before, the content there is extremely blurry. Scrolling vertically to different pages doesn’t fix it. Is it the pdf? No. It’s just Edge. Zoom in and out again and the blurriness is fixed for now. Until it comes back later on a random page.
#3
Duplicate another tab and suddenly it crashes all of the tabs and windows of Edge. Now I need to open them all again and scroll to the positions that they were before…
If you think that it was just a one time issue, you are wrong. All of them happened multiple times and after Windows reboots.
I’m back to Firefox again.4 -
I always emphasize for our trainees to just ask if they need help or have any questions.
But damn, some of them just keep asking about everything! It almost feels like they don’t think to themselves at all..6 -
Employer: Hey, we are moving an API update live tomorrow morning that could affect our apps. Can you regression test the apps to make sure they all work?
Me: The API team is pushing code overtop of live endpoints that can break them?
Employer: Yes, we need the updates to work with a new product we are developing.
Me: And nobody thought about versioning these endpoints so we guarantee uptime on all existing services using them now?
Employer: We looked at that but it cost extra and required us to use the cloud solution so we don’t use versioning.
Me: Okkk… I also take it that the API’s don’t have integration tests written?
Employer: What are integration tests? Are unit tests the same thing?
Me: No, so when do I need to regression test all 7 production apps?
Employer: The API’s are moving to production at 4am and we need it signed off by 7am.
Me: I only have 3 hours to regression test 7 production apps at 4am? Each app, if I just skim over them, would take me 2 hours each. I will do my best but that’s a very short time to ensure complete functionality.
Employer: Don’t you have unit tests?1 -
finally got TI to cough up their SDK and I noticed there's no compiler or linker or anything. Turns out I need to use TASM.
...TASM is for MS-DOS or compatible. I'm on Linux.
Well, it went poorly, as usual, specifically like this:
- tried to automate building with DOSBox config and Python script: output binary always corrupted. Manually repeated, TASM mangles output on DOSBox every time. No PCem or 86box, and i'm on a Ryzen, so no KVM DOS. Out of luck there.
- TASM Linux build or wrapper? No build, but there is a wrapper! ...wait, it needs... 4 things written by random people to be made from source. I mean, that's not actually that bad... oh, after setting all of them up (and struggling through some autoconf/automake bullshit, one of the programs only had source for a 2.x kernel and autoconf/automake were not happy about it) it fails because one project's been worked on a lot more and dropped support for working with the other 3... goddammit.
- Community SDK? Several options for this... but all of them need .NET 2 to run on Win9x, don't work in Wine, or require... hey look, TASM! GODDAMMIT!
- DOS on a real machine? It's a massive bitch to shuttle files to and from a real DOS machine quickly and I can't take 30 minutes between builds that take me 4 minutes to change enough to need tested again.
why must i suffer like this22 -
They are paying me 6€/h, to develop in fucking FoxPro, as a freelancer, illegally.
I don't know how to tell them I'd make way more money as a dogsitter (and also enjoy it way more).
It all began as a favor for my old company, "we really need it plz plz" and then I became a slave.15 -
TLDR: Ask irritating questions, you could end up saving the company money and time...
I’m working on a project where we are integrating 2 legacy web applications with each other.
Business Analyst/Project manager (BA) : Save all the contact details of the selected firm in application A into the database of application B, then expose that data later so that we can output it into the document when the user generates them.
Me: Seems a bit excessive, there’s even a fax number, nobody uses that anymore, are you sure we need all that?
BA: The old document has all that information.
Me: Please just check with client that witch fields are still needed in the document.
BA: Ok, fine, but it’s probably a waste of time…
BA: * Talks with client on phone for 10 minz *
BA: Ok client stays we only need the Lodgement Number on the document.
Me: We already store that and populate it in the document.
BA: I had budgeted 2 days labour for all that, you just saved us a lot of money! -
Can someone explain me...
... WHY GOOGLE PLAY SERVICES NEEDS ALL PERMISSIONS FOR WEBAUTHN(U2F)???
NEED MY CONTACTS, CALENDAR, BODY SENSORS, SMS AND SO ON! ALL FOR U2F???
I PROBABLY SHOULD BE GLAD THAT I DON'T NEED MY GOOGLE ACCOUNT FOR THAT?!?!
Using Firefox and testing WebAuthn instead of the typical dialog I get "Firefox has trouble communicating with Google Play Services" when I try to use that.
If someone knows the responsible people at google, tell them to FIX THAT SHIT.17 -
Deployed to production two days ago, errors still coming out and ALL of them have been my fault :(
I feel really shitty and I feel like I have no brain, maybe dev is not my career
Any advice to overcome this frustration? I really need to read your advices, guys :(16 -
I didn’t turn down a dev freelance project when the client decided against going with best practices because the solution I offered was a well-established design pattern but created a need for a financial management change she didn’t like. I stupidly built what she asked for. It worked fine in the 3rd party vendor test environment but failed on production. After hours of analysis of code to ensure no changes happened to my source during test->prod deployment, and the vendor denying they had config differences between them, and the client refusing to pay, all I could do was abandon the project.2
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Pokemon GO is a trend as if I need to tell you all that. But people are now making money out of it.
www.pokewalk.com is the funniest thing I ever saw today. The site claims that it will walk for you and catch them all. No worries about the battery of your mobile...they will charge it as they collect.
Are you serious?? Where's the fun in that?? Professional walkers cmon !!??8 -
I honestly don't get the idea behind JavaScript frameworks. Like, if JavaScript on its own is really so bad that it's only usable for front-end devs with a framework.. why has nobody considered committing back their changes into JavaScript itself? Makes life easier for everyone.
Also, regarding the framework.. as far as I understand it's a bunch of functions that you load in, right? But do you really need all of those, to the point where the unused ones are justifiable? And wouldn't it make more sense to write them yourself as you need them? I mean that's at least the idea of functions in languages like Bash or C or whatever.
What's the point of frameworks?37 -
I am so mad, I have no words for how fucking much I hate ever having to work or pass work to other incompetent developers or teams, what a fucking waste of time and resources.
After handing off the frontend - for the client to find some team, that would do it in the short time and budget he needs (multiple developers, more fast, much good), he found a team that seemed to be alright for the job and seemed alright to me too, now maybe a month or two later, the client contacts me, that they fucked something up and if I could talk to them.
The email I then received from them seriously made me speechles, mad and sad, all at same time, I spent multiple upon multiple hours, getting a very good readable documentation up (markdown with TOC, properly rendered headers, bulletpoints, all that shit), with all files, all services used, all credentials, even converted all ssh keys into putty ppk format, in case the developers are using windows and are too dumb to do it themselves, nginx configs, it had seriously everything, even too much to list.
They somehow managed to fuck up the entire server, while attempting to "add ssh keys themselves", EVEN FUCKING THOUGH I have included all the keys they need, all the hosting credentials, everything, yet they decided to fuck with shit themselves and completely annihilate the server in the process (HOW?!), so not even the webserver works anymore.
I am fucking speechless, I made it so fucking easy to gather all info and files they need, all properly put into well named folders, along the documentation in an archive and they somehow managed to nuke the fucking server, while attempting to add ssh keys?!
If you don't know how to config a server, then don't fucking touch it and just use everything, that got served to you on a fucking silver platter.
---
I'll just instantly answer the most annoying comment, that somebody could come up with: "why didn't you do it yourself?"
Because in a perfect world, a fully managed team, can do much more than a single developer can, especially in the same timeframe and from what I heard of said client, atleast they did something in terms of developing the system. (which surprises me, considering it's the same people that nuked a server, while trying to add ssh keys)5 -
Got new stickers today ☺
Hopefully I'll get the devRant stickers in the next time 🙈
Don't need all of them but I wanted the small "powered by debian" sticker... 🤯2 -
Bloody Fucking Managers !!!!
Few Months Back...
Manager: Innovation we need Innovation.
Me: What's the process?
Manager: You give idea >we give you people > they do all the work !
Cool right ?
Present situation :
I have given them 5-7 ideas. I am programming for all of them. When I ask for help -- we will see... After the programming is done its working. I need make the documents etc. Everyone uses the tools. I get to be the sucker !1 -
My work gave me three laptops because not one of them can access all the resources I need. So I have to balance my workflow around these three machines.9
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Recently at my work everyone got all hyped about blockchain. I've spent years studying it and especially crypto so I like to think I know a lot about it. Now every time some feature is discussed (like tracking video views) someone non tech shouts out "Oh we can use a blockchain!" And I have to spend half an hour convincing them why it's a bad idea in this particular case. Like we don't need to share that data, we don't need to ensure integrity without trust etc. I mean a blockchain is a great piece of tech but please stop trying to apply it everywhere...
It's like people think that the blockchain features at its most simplified level don't work anywhere else. E.g. as if stuff you put into MySQL suddenly changes because data integrity is not a 'feature' in that sense...2 -
CSS + Noob + Import html
Hey guys
Need some help here.
Is it possible to include an HTML file inside another HTML file without an iframe? I wanted to create the structure of the page in one file and include it inside another HTML (for example, have one index that dynamically includes an HTML file in a section, called by the menu OR having the menu, top and footer in one or two files and include them in all the other pages...)42 -
Damn bro Vue 3 sucks actually. It's just a big function now with arguments like "`this` can be sometimes confusing when TypeScript is used." - hell no, my component was a class and this was the fucking class. nothing was confusing about this.
It's all a clusterfuck of magic now, I don't see why writing `ref(5)` or `return { all of your shit }` after `setup() { complete business logic inclusive functions here }` is better.
I was so looking forward to all the improvments, but why do we need these 3 apis with actually no difference, tried to be explained by the same image of colorful blocks in every single fucking article?
what happened to methods? am i seriously supposed to return them from a function? that just feels wrong.22 -
OH MY GOD, i cant believe this is my 25th day without a job... why!!!! not with all the kubernetes and node js and javascript that i know. lol. not to mention golang and python and all the networking stuff, dns, aws etc. lol where are all the recruiters when i need them?!!!!8
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I’ve been tasked with finding an experienced Project Manager for ‘a sensible cost’ - no specific budget amount shared.
That sounds like “we want the best, but want to pay very little” right?
It’s a massive project, they said “you developed this, did all the documentation and research, you can PM it right?”
“Can’t we just start making progress and adapt as we go?” They asked.
Sure I said (thinking Agile), but they said I just need to get on with it and let them know when finished! So no stakeholder interaction... this is not going to end well...2 -
Whenever I see a website ask
1. Accept all cookies
2. Customize selection
I can see what they're really saying...
1. Accept! and I'll fuck off out of your way and let you read.
2. So you wanna read the content heh? Step into our office. Ok then, lets go through them one-by-one and you can explain to me why you think you don't need that cookie. and then MAYBE we'll fuck off our of your face so you can read the scant few lines of text standing between you and finishing your homework/job/whatever.18 -
Working hard to meet crazy deadline to finish last update before new product announcement to make it look better. Our CEO blabs about new top secret product at some conference throwing away all marketing efforts up to date and putting marketing team into panic mode. Result? They moved the announcement date without discussing it with development. Result? Our efforts and overtimes wasted and we are announcing product before it is ready. End result? I'm pissed so I wrote angry e-mail to our CEO. Wondering what will happen now :-) But with unfinished announced product and crazy deadlines they need me a lot more than I need them.
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In my previous work, when I was under pressure (very often, because we were to few people for all the work) I used to manage the situation in the following way:
PM: It's super-important and prioritary to develop < 2 days feature >. Sales really need that feature because they cannot work without it.
Me: Ok. I'll need from them < 2-hours-to-get data > and then I can leave what I'm doing and start with the feature.
PM: *... goes to tell sales ... comes back*
PM: Well, they say they can work by doing < some not as confortable way as feature, but pretty acceptable >.
Me: Ok, then I'll continue trying to prevent the systems break down inminently.
On this work I learned a lot, but clearly, we were too few people to mantain the site, and too much lazy sales people. -
Best way to avoid procrastination : We tend to avoid commitments or to do large tasks as even visualizing them seems tiring and the longer it takes, the vulnerable we are to distractions
So I use this simple trick
I break my task into numerous sub tasks. For example if I need to finish a feature before day end, I would first list down all the cases I can think of in order and write them down using actual pen and paper.
I then start implementing them step by step.
I mark them checked once done.
It gives me a sense of achievement as I see those checks besides the sub tasks and I can also take breaks between steps.
So all it takes is just first five minutes of planning.
I had to do the above procedure, for this post as well.
Hope it helps fellow developers
:) -
I like JavaScript as a language. But I hate absolutely everything around it. All of these tools just make things more difficult. Sometimes when I clone a project I want everything there. I don't want to then wait 30 minutes to download the latest version of every library used, with at least one of them always breaking something. I don't want to have to use npm or grunt or whatever. Just give me the damn thing I need not make me spend 30 minutes running round in circles! Never have these problems in any other language!
Come on WebAssembly!11 -
Had annual appraisal meeting today. Been in this company for 2yrs now, after being hired outta college. It happens first after 2 years, then yearly.
I have long since known that my boss is a scumbag. My lucky college mates got assigned to great managers, leaders I must say, while I got the typical, know it all boss.
Now this racist, motherfucker, for reasons unknown to me, has mostly disliked me. But hey, the feelings mutual but I don't ever go busting his ass.
Previous employees eventually transferred locations or departments. But I stuck coz I respected some colleagues and learnt a lot from them.
Now this nutjob gave me a 2/5 rating. Says I need to improve my communication. I need to talk more. WTF you goatfucking cunt! I decide how much I wanna talk. I don't waste my time, and even if I did, I don't have any right to waste someone elses time. And talking about communication skills - BITCH! Everytime you speak something, I need like 2 mins to compile your jumbled fucking words in my mind to be able to comprehend what it is you wanted to convey. And you cunt! YOU are going to tell me I need to improve my communication. Dumbfuck I ain't no Shakespeare, but I can convey my message through.
Fucking peasant!
Hmm. The lemon tea sure is good today.4 -
Could the all of the Tencent cloud kindly please fuck off back to China?
Those assholes don't even publish their IP ranges so one could easily block their ass.
Had to rely on external tools and hunt down all of their different ASNs to finally block them from overloading a client's webapp...
Ugh, I need a beer.6 -
Meetings would be better without people.
I mean I like the IDEA of meetings...
Honestly I'm the type of person who if I could would schedule lots of meetings to make sure we're all on the same page, and to be sure the thing is going to do the thing everyone wants / get their perspective, etc. I really want to KNOW what the folks who are going to use this thing need / want / what works best for them.
On the other hand I know that meetings are often more like:
Me: "Ok let's so here's our data, now tell me what fields they want to edit and so forth."
People: "All of them."
Me: "Uh, no you don't want that or they'll break everything ... X, Y and Z require those fields for A, B, and C to work."
Me: "Let's go field by field and you tell me if they need to edit it, and why."
People: "Yeah this first one they have to be able to change this one."
Me: "Wait no, that's the primary key for that table, I don't know why that's on this list but no you can't change that."
People: "Yeah we have to be able to change that."
Me: "No, you can't, do you even know what that number IS?"
People: "Um... no ..."
(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻2 -
Team member knows x better than me?
No fucking way am I gonna ask them to do it. Even if I have to learn the whole damn thingamajig from scratch. Coffee and some Halo OST are all I need, baby!
(In fairness to myself, said teammate is a bit of a hijacker when it comes to helping...)4 -
If I were to do-over, I would:
- Know that the world is MUCH bigger then even the largest city in the most populous country, and I get to pick where I'm going. So I'm going where the grass is green and bosses are not allowed to physically assault their employees, thank you very much.
- Do not care for missing or useless requirements, and only deliver the PoC. the requirements will all change the very second a client, BA or boss look at the PoC, anyway. Let them come.
- know that companies will replace you and do not need you, just as you do not need them. fuck their needs and live your own life. If they ask for overnight unpaid overtime, leave immediately and laugh all the way home. -
It's like everytime you tell your PM that you need to be left alone to code their projects, it goes in one ear and out the other. I usually ignore them when busy coding, but then they start to blow you up on all forms of communication. Where are you? Why aren't you answering me? It's because I am coding away on all of your projects. If we sit here for hours talking, nothing would get done! Like was it necessary to message and call me on several forms of communication??
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I just copy-pasted this into 4 of my apps and republished them.
It's part of my own C# library that removes the need to write boilerplate code.
https://github.com/allanx2000/...
(I have a Merged library with some added NET 4.5 conveniences but that's not check-in)
In general, I think making computers do all the grunt work makes me a bad-ass.3 -
Right,i consider myself a pretty damn good dev... I can back up everything I say to prove that I'm right on not lying to clients
But I see all these devs who do lie... Who withold data from clients cause it's not great.
And I go to clients and prove that they are lying not doing it right.
But I know saying to them... Oi your current devs are shit fire them ... Isn't a good way to get them as a client
Me and my company are open and honest ... we go all out on all of our projects. I work nonstop. It is seriously baffling the kind of developers are out there and how bad they can be I'm... Seriously just.... Urgh 😖
How should I go about talking to clients without going ... Fire them quick or saying that in a ... More humble respectful way...
I need more clients ... To survive and I don't mind coming across as a dick as long as they understand what's going on and that they are people ripped off by these asshole devs5 -
All the crypto bots and hire a hacker adverts make no sense. After all, they still need to either go through the API or make a selenium script. Will still take them 1 to 2 hours at least to build it. For what?
To advertise to a dying platform that has a dwindling community, which is on top of it well-versed in programming and technically affine, so that the probability of profiting of it is tiny...
My conjecture: A devrant member is pulling a long running prank.
I bet it's someone like theRealJase. Or someone like that.7 -
Fuck windows!
Now that I have your attention. My problem is with "IAR embedded workbench", not so much with windows but I'll get to that.
I've used that IDE for a few years.. 2 years ago. Since then I apparently forgot how to even create a project from scratch with adding all the necessary libraries and all that.
My initial deal with a client was to give them a solution using whatever tools I deem necessary. As I recently moved to linux and IAR is not available for that os.. and I also enjoyed working with CLion and PyCharm which Are available I decide to use CLion to write my C project.
A problem was that to compile code for microcontrollers I need tools unsupported by CLion.. oh well. I can do all the compilation and uploading of the code through terminal .. so I make a bash script that does it all. Super convenient. Development is going well and all.. until they ask me for the project.
I sent them the project so that they can see my progress. They can't do shit with what I gave them because they don't even have make on their machines let alone the compiler. All they have is IAR. But the guy that wants to see the code is not really a programmer.. he is a hardware specialist so I can't expect him to do anything more than use what he knows. He doesn't need or want to learn more right now.
So I go to windows and start porting my code to an IAR project and 2 days later I am still stuck with it. FUCK. Not only was the installation process horrible but the tools I wanted to install additionally did not work as promised either.
I know it took me about 2 days to setup all I needed on linux but I was enjoying it every step of the way. While this garbage is frustrating me so much. The fact that I used to do it before adds to the pain.
I am this close to telling them to just look at my code in notepad and I can setup a vm for them in which they can compile it if they really really need to.
If they just told me from the very start that they want me to work with IAR that would have been fine. I would have never seen the easier way and would have gladly figure it out then. Not now.1 -
>ooo new thing to play with and learn, yay!
>*Installs using directions*
>Hello world program fails
>Oh I need these dependencies
>Wait the deps all need their own deps...
>But one of them is deprecated.. what do?
I love the feeling of working on something new but
I hate ending up spending more time getting a workflow setup and chasing down random bugs or hacky fixes just to get something stable so I can start working!!!1 -
TL;DR; do your best all you like, strive to be the #1 if you want to, but do not expect to be appreciated for walking an extra mile of excellence. You can get burned for that.
They say verbalising it makes it less painful. So I guess I'll try to do just that. Because it still hurts, even though it happened many years ago.
I was about to finish college. As usual, the last year we have to prepare a project and demonstrate it at the end of the year. I worked. I worked hard. Many sleepless nights, many nerves burned. I was making an android app - StudentBuddy. It was supposed to alleviate students' organizational problems: finding the right building (city plans, maps, bus schedules and options/suggestions), the right auditorium (I used pictures of building evac plans with classes indexed on them; drawing the red line as the path to go to find the right room), having the schedule in-app, notifications, push-notifications (e.g. teacher posts "will be 15 minutes late" or "15:30 moved to aud. 326"), homework, etc. Looots of info, loooots of features. Definitely lots of time spent and heaps of new info learned along the way.
The architecture was simple. It was a server-side REST webapp and an Android app as a client. Plenty of entities, as the system had to cover a broad spectrum of features. Consequently, I had to spin up a large number of webmethods, implement them, write clients for them and keep them in-sync. Eventually, I decided to build an annotation processor that generates webmethods and clients automatically - I just had to write a template and define what I want generated. That worked PERFECTLY.
In the end, I spun up and implemented hundreds of webmethods. Most of them were used in the Android app (client) - to access and upsert entities, transition states, etc. Some of them I left as TBD for the future - for when the app gets the ADMIN module created. I still used those webmethods to populate the DB.
The day came when I had to demonstrate my creation. As always, there was a commission: some high-level folks from the college, some guests from businesses.
My turn to speak. Everything went great, as reversed. I present the problem, demonstrate the app, demonstrate the notifications, plans, etc. Then I describe at high level what the implementation is like and future development plans. They ask me questions - I answer them all.
I was sure I was going to get a 10 - the highest score. This was by far the most advanced project of all presented that day!
Other people do their demos. I wait to the end patiently to hear the results. Commission leaves the room. 10 minutes later someone comes in and calls my name. She walks me to the room where the judgement is made. Uh-oh, what could've possibly gone wrong...?
The leader is reading through my project's docs and I don't like the look on his face. He opens the last 7 pages where all the webmethods are listed, points them to me and asks:
LEAD: What is this??? Are all of these implemented? Are they all being used in the app?
ME: Yes, I have implemented all of them. Most of them are used in the app, others are there for future development - for when the ADMIN module is created
LEAD: But why are there so many of them? You can't possibly need them all!
ME: The scope of the application is huge. There are lots of entities, and more than half of the methods are but extended CRUD calls
LEAD: But there are so many of them! And you say you are not using them in your app
ME: Yes, I was using them manually to perform admin tasks, like creating all the entities with all the relations in order to populate the DB (FTR: it was perfectly OK to not have the app completed 100%. We were encouraged to build an MVP and have plans for future development)
LEAD: <shakes his head in disapproval>
LEAD: Okay, That will be all. you can return to the auditorium
In the end, I was not given the highest score, while some other, less advanced projects, were. I was so upset and confused I could not force myself to ask WHY.
I still carry this sore with me and it still hurts to remember. Also, I have learned a painful life lesson: do your best all you like, strive to be the #1 if you want to, but do not expect to be appreciated for walking an extra mile of excellence. You can get burned for that. -
Fucking asynchronous code can be very annoying sometimes. Had to struggle the whole day yesterday to get it work properly so I fetch all the results from a function which does many asynchronous calls.
Then I realized that I just need two more counter variables to increase and later decreases to detect when all of them finished.
That shit..1 -
I made a huge mistake
I got "in the zone", I was coding so nice and fast and everything was working, so I didn't want to commit every single minute and then have to go back, cherrypick commits squash them revert them etc.
So I didn't commit anything at all... Now if I were to commit the commit would modify 2 files, create 26 new files and delete 2 files.
The changes include moving from JS to TS, implementing a desearialization scheme, implementing a server class and wrapper client classes, with common type interfaces for different requests...
So now I need to save my changes somewhere, go back to the last commit and slowly incorporate the changes.
I'm dumb9 -
I dislike ignorant pricks that insult others while being wrong.
I dislile people that feel the need to insult others based on their choices or prefferences for products, music and stuff like that.
I dislike people that are so blatantly arrogant that they refuse to acknowledge being wrong because of some weird made up status in their head (i.e i have a phd...i cannot possibly be wrong)
I really dislike teenagers that think that they know shit. They never do, suprisingly we have many of them here...
I dislike people that find ways to justify being assholes to others.
I also dislike people that hide behind a keyboard.
I dislike people that tend to follow trend opinions: "lolz mac suckz i kan du errthing in LenIXxX" shit like that irrititates me, also the php hate wars, I see people bitching about not having a job or experience in the field because they wont hire them for whatever hipster shit they are not using.......yet they make fun of people with php skills that have been on the industry far longer than what the haters have known how to use a computer....ah and some of them here are also on their teens....
All in all. I hate assholes really. I see many of them in this industry, and even tho I have seen a couple of them in here the great majority of the user base is absolutely amazing.
:) y'all beautiful people have a great weekend!8 -
I went on a coding tear last week, probably because my boss was on vacation. I optimized the bejesus out of a half dozen apps and created five or six new features to downstream apps. But now I need to write them all down, and make retroactive stories for them. I hate admin.5
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When the client wants to go live with his website and there are big gaps in content. I have told them every Monday for the past 3 weeks that there are big holes in content and they need to go on the Cms and start populating. Nothing happens and he keeps on asking when can we go live. Fuck fuck fuck them all.1
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F**king hate Windows for its insanely confusing proxy setup required for software development...
> Setup proxy in Windows network settings
> Then, setup HTTP_PROXY & HTTPS_PROXY environment variable at the system/user level.
> Followed by separate proxy settings for java, maven, docker, git, npm, bower, jspm, eclipse, VS Code, every damn IDE/Editor which downloads plugins...
> On top of everything, find out the domains which does not need to go through proxy and add them to NO_PROXY.. at each level..
> It does not end here. Sometimes, I need to setup proxy for SSH connections... like, if I have to use git with SSH and not HTTP/S... Uhhh....
More than half of the problems me and my dev team face is related to setting the right proxy. Why can't it be like, set in one place and everything picks up from there, like in any linux machine or for God's sake, a Mac ?
Worst of all is, my org uses a configuration script, which resolves into a list of proxy servers, from which one of them will be used. So, I need to download that script, find out which is the right proxy server and then, use it in all the aforesaid places... WTH ?????
Is this a common workplace problem for all developers ??? Will this be solved by Windows Subsystem for Linux ???9 -
!dev
Childhood trauma has lasting effects and it's our own responsibility to identify them and break our barriers.
I have 2 projects, both of them are stuck because 1. Dependant on other team and I am not able to fix the setup of their service even after seeking help from them; 2. My setup of Android Studio started throwing error out of no where when I am low on time for merging the code to mainline, we need to perform QA and without my build working we might not be able to test a use case.
I have scrum tomorrow, I feel scared to tell this to my stakeholders just because I think they will think it's my problem. Something wring with me. As a child my father blamed me for the mistakes I didn't have any control over, again and again. Whenever I feel awkward in any situation I think that he must have said that how big of a dumb I am. How I don't have any brains to do anything. Those things still come to me. That's why I am scared, people will BLAME me for this. But I have worked on my capacity to solve this. That's it.
That's all that matters. I have seeked help already, now I need to discuss this with the management and not feel scared.7 -
Anyone else out there feel useless as a programmer? By that I mean you have always struggled to solve problems quickly and effectively. Or to fully understand the language and typical patterns and algorithms. Or to retain in memory all the things you need to “just know” on a daily basis to avoid having to look them up regularly and look foolish or incompetent? It seems I can’t keep my mind focused on learning, whether by tutorials or hands-on practice. I should probably just switch careers, but I’m so close to retirement that it seems stupid to attempt such a thing. Am I alone?12
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A couple nights ago I was thinking how can absurdly incompetent programmers exist out there (based on stories I read here), and I think I know the reason. They just don't like doing it, to them it's just a job. They get into the building, work and go home. They learned programming in college but probably never wrote anything for fun. Because of that they don't dedicate themselves to learning new tech, don't try to improve and be good at the job, all they want is the money to be able to survive and that's it. Since they don't have the curiosity to drive them forward, they just don't and keep writing shitty code.
I'm not saying you need to have a bazillion side-projects, work an 8h shift and then go home and spend 3h on personal projects, or that you have to breathe programming and tech. All I'm saying is that, to be competent and good (this probably applies to most jobs) you have to like what you do and have at least some interest in it.7 -
Well, this week was a week from hell. It was a short 3 day week, and all of my internal Customers, who are normally pretty reasonable, just all unloaded on me at the same time. "We need this now!" "Have you done this?" "Why didn't you do that?" "We need you to do this, because our migration takes place in 30 minutes." (first notice of the migration). And then to top everything off, I'm creating a rollback DDL, and I've spent a couple of hours pulling my hair out, because a set of columns that need rolled back aren't in Prod, so I can't roll them back, because my own DDL drops them, and broadcast my natural meltdown to the entire DevOps team, feeling like an utter jackass after I realize my mistake. And even at quitting time, they are still walking up, and texting, and emailing. Holy f**k, I'm only going to be gone four days, two of them weekend, and will be back. All of this while trying to sell my house and pack boxes and move to an apartment. Can I retire now? Looks at retirement account... Nope, I'll be working until I'm 95. Just shoot me already!1
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Cordova or Xamarin?
I need to build a mobile app again, mostly for Android, because an interior Official app's functionality is so interior (written but monkeys) that it has finally pissed me of enough to take action.... And possibly be profitable (ads banner).
Mostly targeting Android but hey why not hit them all or at least also UWP.. I ain't paying for the Apple license... (Or maybe dfox could help release it...)
Anyway, which is better? I kinda want to pick up React and maybe try Typescript? (currently work with MEA(v1)N at work)
But I also use C# WPF, but mostly for my own projects these days when I need a desktop GUI.
I don't really feel like relearning Android SDK, I learned the SDK back when it was for Ice Cream.8 -
I am in need of a new Technopoly/Chinese pocket surveillance mobile device. Since I am obligated by work to own a pocket surveillance device, and I have been an iPhone user for a while now and all my stuff is there, does anyone have a recommendation in the “11” range of those devices? Any bad experiences with them? Looking to spend not more than $500 for a used one (looking on Swappa.com).11
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I just found the current main project of the people who originally wrote the codebase I’m mainly working with. After all these years they still write incoherent spaghetti mess. I need to make a throwaway GH account just to tell them people like them are the reason people hate PHP…1
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"you need to check the tickets as well as ERP tasks everyday."
Dafuq? Aren't I doing that? And also, I'm busy working on other tasks, and he just keeps giving me more, and there's no way I can just simply fix all of them without enough time. 😠1 -
God damn it! I have multiple exams that I need to study for, but can't because of my headache that I have had for two weeks now... My mom finally forced me to the doctor, and apparently I have gotten a severe case of migraine... no devices, no books and no lights allowed until it gets better.
Worst part? The exams are next week, and I havent been able to study, not even one page out of hundreds...
Guess who's retaking them this summer... döda mig 😞
Signing off from all tech now until it gets better..4 -
Developers insist that I give them a sketch file instead of a zeplin doc I'm like ok fine. Then I am told in like three weeks of development that they don't understand the sketch file when they insisted on it. So I'm like ok fine let me put it on zeplin. Then I'm told to compare their work with my designs. And ofcourse it doesn't match. So i sit and literally go through each margin , each padding with them. Then I'm told that they r over riding exsisting styles and say that's alot of development so I say ok I need to ask the product owner if it's gonna take more time. They get mad at me and say why I need to ask this? Like u told me it's gonna take you longer and I need to tell my boss? Then my boss says confirm all the styles with marketing ( everyone btw has seen my designs, reviewed them, and I have confirmed literally every change) and now I've been told to change a button to red ( why r your cta's and errors the same color I have no idea ??!) And then I tell the developers and they make a huge deal about changing the button from blue to red. NO ONE HERE HAS A STRUCTURE TO PRESENT HAND OFF TO THE DELVEOPERS. ITS SO ANNOYING.
Also can I just say in my presentation time and I had spent time on my designs and someone says oh let me show everyone through my screen.
I literally got a word out before all the delveopers in the room start arguing and skipping my design slides like R FO REAL? LET ME GO THROUGH THE JOURNEY ITS MY JOB.
LET ME HAVE CONTROL ON MY DESIGNS
UAIQBA.EAUKWHWUAGWNKRVIEVJWFEJCSJCSJCAHCSHXWH
sorry. I am typing this sitting on a sofa eating cake when I'm supposed to be on a diet but I'm wallowing and crying6 -
- Hey, I need to do X and I need your department to do it.
- "We can't do X, this is against company policy!"
- Oh, sorry, I didn't know. But I will have to justify it to my boss, can you point me to where in the policy it says you can't do X?
- "No I can't, it won't be there. It is just common sense"
- Wait, what? You saying you can't do something because it is against the company policy even though there is no restriction against it in company policy?!
- "Other companies don't do it either"
- I will need you to say that in writing, I need to explain it to my boss.
- "Our email server is FUBAR"
- It can be hand-written
- "I can't give a declaration in name of my department!"
- Wait, so you can interpret company policy any way you want, make decisions regardless of what the policy actually says but you can't own up to it in writing?!?
- "..."
- ...
(Some context: I've been emailing them about X for more than a week. Just got crickets for a response. Not even an evasive coward response, just no answer at all. And calling them leaves no paper trail. Fucking oxygen thiefs)
For fuck sake, are non-tech departments always filled with complete morons?!? Does anyone have ever worked with smart, or at least minimally-coherent non-tech people?!?!
Seriously, does anyone there have some story about some non-stupid non-tech/analog/muggle coworker?!?
I'm inclined to think that anyone who can think systematically is either working in tech or not working at all.6 -
I was just going over some projects I need to transfer to others team members and was reminded of all the utility apps I created. Particularly on that covers Windows paths to Linux....
Or basically path.Replace("\\","/") in a GUI.
I actually use it a lot whenever I hardcode a file path in Java for testing or make some partial path Linux compliant.
I think it saves me a lot of time but I'm the only person I think that creates these apps... basically for anything I find myself repeating often... Even these simple things.
Am I weird? Or just good at identifying things that can be outsourced? And outsourcing them?16 -
Anyone ever just get seriously discouraged about peoples view on how easy/difficult it is to code?
A client has requested that they want a system built so they can create surveys and send them to people via email all in one tool. Im not a good front end designer but I know how to develop it. So they hired a designer to send me screen mockups and I will develop them. Easy enough.
This is where the bullshit starts... The designer was supposed to send me the V1 designs last Friday so I could begin building. I told them that I could have a rough version of some pages (with placeholder text and whatnot) ready for the following Friday (tomorrow). However the designer didn't send me the designs until 5 minutes before we were all meeting yesterday. We were all going over the designs in the meeting and this is how the conversation went (roughly):
Client: Wow these designs are amazing, I cant wait to see what it looks like when it functions. Are we still going to have a demo version by Friday?
Me: Well seeing as I just got the designs today, Ill have to look them over and get back to you on a new timeline.
Designer: Yah sorry about the delay, designing can be tricky sometimes.
Client: No worries, I understand. However I want to stick to the same timeline and have the demo by Friday.
Me: Well as I said, Im only getting the designs now, this is the first time I'm seeing them so I'll have to look them over and re-evaluate.
Client: Yeah but the designs are done so it will be easy for you to code it by then. It's all right there in front of you. I need to run, excited for Friday! Bye!
Designer: Bye!
Me: ...........
-- I know its partially my fault for saying I could have a demo done by Friday assuming the designer would have it done on time but COME ON. I hate when people say something is easy when they have no idea what it entails or how to even do it.1 -
Classmate: I'm done with this
I read his code
Me: Good. But could you make that a little bit more.. readable?
Classmate: Eh..what?
Me: Or use one or two lists less.. and the naming
Classmate: But I need them all!
It's a square around a coordinate within given borders, not rocket science.1 -
Just published my first internal app, which is nice
We’ve also now started using GitLab, so I need to work out an easy way for use to transfer all of the reports from SourceSafe.
There’s only about 500+ of them, should be fun2 -
So I still have my very first email account, a hotmail account as a secondary, kinda spam account.
i signed up around 2000 i guess.
someone tried to get in, i got loads of mails of failed login attempts so i wanned to go and change my pw. But because of that bastard i cant login with just pw anymore, i need my phone. THAT ACCOUNT IS 20 FUCKING YEARS OLD. I never even provided a phone.
spent the last 20 minutes providing personal details to microsoft which are probably not the ones i used for signing up anyway.
you know how careful we were whem signing up for something online back them? I probably signed up as Thomas anderson from zion...
anyway, done now and bow it will take 24h for them to review it..
all of this only to reset my forgotten pw for my epic games account for with i signed up with that mail..,
holy guacamole.. I should start to trust password managers...1 -
I tried to apply to TrippleByte just to see if I could get a job through them...
Their tests are soo hard imo
It's not like I lack skills in programming its just that they require you to have a VERY varied background and only give you about a min to answer each question which can take a slow code reader that long to read without having even processed what the answer may be ;u;
This isn't making me feel good about my white boarding skills since I have yet to be in one of those. I'mma need all the help I can get @_@4 -
Finished work early and raced home to have a telephone interview and the company "forgot" to ring me 😣
Next day they emailed to say sorry, mix up at our end, we'll send you some new times. 3 days later I get an email with a list of times and they are all mid morning or afternoon, so I'd need to book time off work for them
Really don't know if I can be bothered anymore, the thought of working for them has lost its appeal already and I've not even had the first interview yet.
Also, I wonder what would have happened if id forgotten to attend the interview? Doubt I would have gotten a second chance... -
I just want to like fucking push all this shit out from my desk and throw things I'm so angry right now i can't seem to start what I need to do today like I'm fucking paralysed
And shit seems to be happening like ghosts, literally things falling when I haven't even touched them pc being really fucking loud etc1 -
My cousin was studying computer science, and he was telling me about the coding and the programming stiff, I got inpired by him and I since then I wanted to be a dev, especially when you can make some thing from nothing, unlike other jobs you have to get tools a parts and start to attach them together in order to make a product, while programming all you need is your laptop and couple of softwares and you can make as products as you want.
It is MAGIC2 -
Im not involved in any projects at all anymore. My direct collegae is planned fully for the coming months. It’s clear everyone just wants to get rid of me.
If i ask the teamlead for feedback i dont get any.
If i ask the manager for feedback i get to hear he talked to the lead but he has no time to talk with me.
Giving me a compliment hurted his guts. Ive spend weeks just documenting bullshit.
All im allowed is to help out with tiny annoying tasks and i need to do them 10000% perfect. I’m a human, i’m not perfect. I accept the fact i’m not and so should they.1 -
Usually I use my laptop which has ubuntu installed but sometimes if I'm doing something for long period of time I use my desktop which has windows 7 installed. You know for games and shit.
Here is the bad part about all of this
*Rant incoming*
This fucking piece of shit ass licker. Deleted my entire god damn paths.
And if you don't know if you don't have the right paths you can't do shit basically. This fucking piece of smelly shit. DELETED THEM FUUUUUCJDUCKFUUUCKKKKFUUUUUCK NOW I HAVE TO WRITE ALL OF THEM AGAIN ?! FUCK YOU FUUUUUUCKKK GO SUCK A BIG DICK FOR MAKING A FUCKING SYSTEM MECHANIC THIS FUCKING FRAGILE. WHAT THE FUUUUCK AND ITS SO HARD TO FUCKING GET THE PATHS RIGHT TOO. SHITSHISHIT AND I CAN FORMAT TO A NEW OS BUT IF ITS WINDOWS I NEED TO INSTALL EVERY DAMN BIT OF DRIVER AGAIN FUUUUUCK THIS MOTHER FUCKING SHIT
linux i'm sorry I was cheating on you with that piece of shit cheap whore. You are the right one for me. Even though If I need to work hours to make a software work on you l, when you work you work for good, not like this piece of shit that decides to delete important information out of nowhere.7 -
I need a new hobby. Programming doesn't excite me anymore, at least not how it did a couple of years back. I'd like to get into robotics and stuff, but everything's expensive where I live. I'd like to get into cars, also too expensive where I live. I like playing video games, but I suck at them and they bring me no feeling of having accomplished something. Sports? Suck at them too. I'd like to ski, but I live in South America. I just don't know what to do with my free time. Programming feels like a chore nowadays, but it's all I have.32
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I'm thinking of self hosting all my small web projects,
I have this old laptop running ubuntu server heedlessly I used to store and stream pirated movies, after multiple embarrassing moments with free backend/platform as a service options and not finding a cheap VPS, this seems like the way to go. I don't get much traffic on these sites i just want them to be available when i need to present them.
then there's tons of other features that are locked behind a paywall,
I once had to store images in the database because heroku wont accept file uploads and the project hadn't been paid, in short, I was dead broke9 -
Me 🤗"Since you know the domain far better than me, can I ask you to help me understand if I managed to cover all the edge cases with these UNIT TESTS?
😒" no no no, you don't need to check for those cases, you already do that in your code"
🤗 "I'm sorry, I must have explained myself badly. I have written these UNIT TESTS exactly to ... TEST if those CHECKS in my code work and what I need is you to tell me if there are additional cases ..."
😫"but you don't need to!!! You already have that logic in your code"
😐😵☠ 🦍💊🔫🔪"you know what? I'm gonna give them a second look. Thanks"
And then I moonwalked out of the room -
In my working floor there is a large bottle of water for waterstation. It usually ran out during the middle of the month. So I curious about the ran out situation, I got the answer from the housekeeper.
"The was not enough budget to allocate water bottle for our floor, we need to share all of them for the whole building. We only received 4 bottles for a half-month."
(It ran out 4 days from the beginning of the month)
...
EEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH2 -
I tried mate!
I'm not sure if I like it that much!
@darksideofyay got me into mate tea and I just had to try it for some unknown reason.
I didn't get the pot and bombilla because that seemed unnecessarily expensive for a tea I had not tried.
I got the tea leaves, brewed them like green tea and it didn't work at all. The flavour was lacking and it was a letdown.
But I knew I was drinking it wrong. I needed bombilla. But hold on, @darksideofyay was brewing her toasted mate like tea. So I toasted a handful of leaves and brewed it.
And yay! I like that thicc tobacco aroma. The taste profile is better than green tea but nowhere near the black teas. All in all I'm convinced I need to try it with bombilla.
Fun times.30 -
My college apparently needs their hand held and be gently guided through everything they're being paid to do to get me ready for classes:
First attempt to get registered: Never got my student ID. Missed 1/3 of the semester since they completely forgot to process me.
Second attempt (current):
Took 3 weeks to get ahold of the college at all, took another week to get in to see an academic advisor (had to come in and wait 6 hours for that day, without leaving, to see one. They weren't busy, they went DND all day and 6 hours later one was caught doing nothing but playing games for 6 hours.) Vocational Rehabilitation was supposed to pay all but $86 of what grants wouldn't cover (not bad, not bad) but even though Voc Rehab sent it, and got receipt of deposit, they "never got the money". 3 days before classes, found out I have textbooks online I must claim and they never told me about them, however I can't access them as I need them to give me claim codes. They're closed at that point in the day.
It's currently Sunday and classes start tomorrow. What other surprises will I have tomorrow? Who the fuck knows? -
Bad English aside I am so sick of incompetent customer service reps. Holy shit it's like they will hire anyone these days.
Here just read from this script and not the code version. That's all the tech you need to know right here on this single piece of paper.
Fucking incompetent bastards need to go work at a non technical job like Burger King because tech support is beyond them.
They'd probably fuck that up to. That's a completely different rant, those who can't even do fast food jobs right. At that point just go get on disability because your fucked.
To be fair I will occasionally get someone in the tech support sector who knows their shit but it's few and far between and its always a welcome surprise.12 -
I've been fighting with my xmlrant.com hosting provider for a good several days now regarding enabling web deploy for my account.
According to their screenshot it all works, according to my various attempts still getting either 404 or 401 with the same login / server details!
So frustrating... It almost looks as though same authentication works differently for them locally and for me externally... Maybe domain name needs to be in FQDN format... Or smth else... Either way this will probably end up with them saying fuck off, all is working on our end.
And as well it might - it just might be my incompetence... *self-doubt creeping in*
But it's still frustrating nevertheless.
So far I need to settle for unreliable FTP deploy, which introduces big overhead as always copies entire deployment folder, even is only a few files are actually changed.
*Le sigh* -
Web dev...
I used to be a developer, long time ago I decided to start a whole different page in my life but it brought me back to web dev.
the reason I gave up on programming in general is simple, it started to transform into an abomination of some kind.
an example would be this massive amalgamation of frameworks, "packages", package managers and so on.
Frameworks, all do the same thing in a the most terrible way it could possibly do it. DI containers with massive constructors... constructing objects where you won't even need them.
Package managers with uncontrolled flow of shitcode that people blindly embed in to their software and call it a day!
Most of the products I came across while searching for a solution were just as bad as I would make it, I understand, today we need software solutions by "yestarday", and basically it is one of the reasons I had to do it all my self and jump back in to this hell. But cant we do a bit better ?4 -
Perhaps as a tip for the junior devs out there, here's what I learned about programming skills on the job:
You know those heavy classes back in college that taught you all about Data Structures? Some devs may argue that you just need to know how to code and you don't need to know fancy Data Structures or Big o notation theory, but in the real world we use them all the time, especially for important projects.
All those principles about Sets, (Linked) lists, map, filter, reduce, union, intersection, symmetric difference, Big O Notation... They matter and are used to solve problems. I used to think I could just coast by without being versed in them.. Soon, mathematics and Big o notation came back to bite me.
Three example projects I worked in where this mattered:
- Massive data collection and processing in legacy Java (clients want their data fast, so better think about the performance implications of CRUD into Collections)
- ReactJS (oh yes, maps and filters are used a lot...)
- Massive data collection in C# where data manipulation results are crucial (union, intersection, symmetric difference,...)
Overall: speed and quality mattered (better know your Big o notation or use a cheat sheet, though I prefer the first)
Yes, the approach can be optimized here, but often we're tied to client constraints, with some room if we're lucky.
I'm glad I learned this lesson. I would rather have skills in my head and in memory than having to look up things and try to understand them all the time.5 -
i never knew id reach that point when i need to take a break from programming and everything that has been causing me so much stress for the past few days. and to be honest, it actually feels great to be focused on only one thing instead of stressing out on different projects and debugging them all at once.
in a few days, ill prolly go back to programming some side projects. its not like i can keep myself away from them...
programming is like a magnet for. that magnetic force is growing stronger day by day and im being pulled closer to it. im happy about it except for some occasions when i get too stressed.4 -
So I spent yesterday designing the UI to my app... there were a lot of buttons and options and stuff...
I spent a few hours today implementing the actual logic.... and redesigning the UI based on it.
All the options and buttons disappeared now though... as I apparently didn't really need them after thinking about what I actually wanted the app to do....3 -
When a client says they have changed that need to be done urgently.. When I ask them for a list of what needs to be done, all I hear are crickets... Not my loss if you let your website suffer.2
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Used to work salary and in-house for client but now do freelance for them ‘cause ‘rona.
Adobe CC and Font Suitcase licenses are due for renewal and they want to cancel them for all but essential in-house senior staff.
I tell them I have both at home, on my own dime, but I need their font folder to be able to use them.
So I have 12,000 fonts now.1 -
Most awesome game ever! It mostly plays by itself and cheats... or maybe it a bug: You (as Autoplay) don't have to beat all the NPCs to advance....
Strangely it feels sort of familiar... O right bc I usually God Mode all games..... But still need to play thru them manually.
Also there's some Chinese left in one of the buttons... they forgot to translate... But maybe that's... Most of time all we care about is the graphics and seeing rank go up....3 -
It feels like half of what I do is just tell people that their code sucks and it needs to be replaced, then I drag them through the 5 stages of grieving the loss of an application that has them trapped in an abusive relationship.
1. Denial:
The unique and complicated needs of our business lead to this unique and complicated architecture. This is all here for a reason, and it's all needed.
2. Anger:
What do you mean it's going to take 6 months to rebuild this? We made MVP in 3 months!
3. Bargaining:
Surely we don't need to throw it all away! There must be something worth salvaging!
4. Depression:
Stake holders and going to think we're not getting anything done! This is a nightmare 😭
Six months later...
6. Acceptance:
Holy shit thank god we got away from that glass tower before it shattered and cut us all to pieces! Side note: development velocity is on fleek. #profit3 -
They told me Xamarin Forms could create an app for many platforms
They didn't tell me that the Forms extensions for APIs would not work at all with the Android extensions, iOS extensions and I would need to reinstall them for each platform
They didn't tell me that at the end, I have to write individual code for each platform.
I was promised an all-in-one toolkit. I'm just writing code for Android and iOS apps, PLUS forms
I can't even find a reliable PDF generator for this. Documentations are outdated and don't work, either that, for it takes a million steps to generate a PDF file2 -
Kodi is shit.
And all the other things (which seem to be just kodi with a different ui. All of them) claiming to be "tv box ready" with sentences like "let your smart tv look old": bro if I can't even install fucking netflix alongside youtube with a nice navigation (product native at best), need to use some kind of keyboard because you won't work with my paired aftv remote and get like 4 fps on a fucken raspberry pi.. my smart tv looks like it's from 2075.8 -
I'm curious, why do you guys seem to always put up with "I changed my mind, I need it by Friday" kind of requests? "I've pulled an all-nighter, because customer wanted it before the holidays" - didn't you agree to do it after the holidays? Did the customer come by with a bag of money for you to put away everything else for them? Even if you do get paid extra, do you really get that much more to make your suffering worth it?6
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Me: IDK how this works. Lets ask support.
PLC Support: Use these ID's to locate what you need in our documentation.
Me: Why the fuck are all of them invald and I cant find shit?!
PLC Support: 🙃🤷 -
Sometimes my hatred for code is so.. overwhelming that I think I need a sabbatical or should even stop altogether.
Let's face it. All code sucks. Just on different levels.
Want to go all bare metal? Love low level bit fiddling. Well, have fun searching for concurrency, memory corruption bugs. Still feel confident? Get ulcers from large C/C++ code base already in production, where something in the shared memory, function pointer magic is not totally right?
So you strive for more clean abstractions, fancy the high level stuff? Well, can you make sense of gcc's template error messages, are you ready for the monad, leaving behind the mundane everyday programmers, who still wonders about the scope of x and xs?
Wherever you go. Isn't it a stinking shit pile of entropy, arbitrary human made conventions? You're just getting more familiar with them, so you don't question them, they become your second skin, you become proficient - congrats you're a member of the 1337.7 -
client: "can you build out a staging server for us? here's all the code, everything you need"
me: "awesome, looking good, i have almost everything i need, just give me the credentials for the server, and I'll get started installing all the infrastructure"
client: "ok, try these!"
me: "doesn't work"
client: "this one?"
me: "doesn't work..."
client: "how about this one?"
me: "STILL NOT WORKING!!!"
imagine you want someone to do stuff on your server and you don't even know the root SSH password.... smh
why is this always a problem, use fucking 1password or something its 40 bucks a year, secure, and you can organize alllll your passwords. don't be a fucking boomer and write them on a piece of paper, or worse, apparently like my client, never know it or have it in the first place.5 -
Hello ranters, I have to send my beloved laptop to acer support to get somethings fixed and I'm worried for my stickers. I don't want to get them damaged or lost (maybe they need to change the screen back plate or maybe they send me a new laptop all together). Is there a way to peel the off and reapply them with new glue?5
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started to try out xamarin. a ideal way to write it once and use it in 3 apps. on windows all was fine. android sdk adn ndk installed everything ok. starts to looked at ios hmm, you need mac to build project, simulate. oh wait even the UI designer you need mac pc.
WTF is going on here, are you serious apple. come to think of it, now i get how apple sales numbers are high. when developers and companies need to by apple pc in order to make a fucking app for them. but that's not all you need to pay 100euro a year to publish the app.15 -
Best:
Seeing ALL the members of my team finally coming into their own. One person tackled our entire not-at-all-simple CI/CD setup from scratch knowing nothing about any of it and, while not without bumps in the road, did an excellent job overall (and then did the same for some other projects since he found himself being the SME). Two of my more junior people took on some difficult tasks that required them to design and build some tricky features from the ground-up, rather than me giving them a ton of guidance, design and even a start on the basic code early on (I just gave them some general descriptions of what I was looking for and then let them run with it). Again, not without some hiccups, but they ultimately delivered and learned a lot in the process and, I think, gained a new sense of self-confidence, which to me is the real win. And my other person handled some tricky high-level stuff that got him deep in the weeds of all the corporate procedures I'd normally shield them all from and did very well with it (and like the other person, wound up being an SME and doing it for some other projects after that). It took a while to get here, but I finally feel like I don't need to do all the really difficult stuff myself, I can count on them now, and they, I think, no longer feel like they're in over their heads if I throw something difficult at them.
Worst:
A few critical bugs slipped into production this year, with a few requiring some after-hours heroics to deal with (and, unfortunately, due to the timing, it all fell on me). Of course, that just tells us that next year we really need to focus on more robust automated testing (though, in reality, at least one of the issues almost certainly would not - COULD NOT - have been caught before-hand anyway, and that's probably true for more than just one of them). We had avoided major issues the previous three years we've been live, so this was unusual. Then again, it's in a way a symptom of success because with more users and more usage, both of which exploded this year, typically does come more issues discovered, so I guess it tempers the bad just a little bit.2 -
My first rant: I need to appease multiple managers with custom software solutions and each manager has their own view as to how it "should be."
This leads to the FUN of having each offer their conflicting suggestions and thinking I am the issue if something is not implemented - or if something isn't.
No, I didn't forget or mess up. It's impossible to appease everyone! I'm going to need to set up a meeting sometime to tell them all to work it out among themselves...2 -
Once I had a junior who was the child of the boss, whom would refuse to listen because they thought they knew better. That junior was ambitious and always wanted harder tasks even though at the end of the day, someone would need to “pair” with them (aka go and do the task for them).
I left that place. Now I have a junior who knows so little that if they came and told me they don’t know how to turn on a computer, I wouldn’t be surprised (yes, unfortunately the bar went down incredibly fast).
I feel sorry for the new junior. I don’t have bandwidth for all of this. Nobody in the team has.
I do think it sucks that companies in general are so against juniors, but I wish at least that the ones who still make the cut were a little bit more prepared.6 -
Control your searches like an ADULT damn it!!!
So we have records that can have any of a bazillion different reference numbers associated with them. No big deal. Everyone does right?
Our customer's love to run reports and so we have this one option for "just look at a hell of a lot of reference numbers". I call it the 'fuck all' search.
Really it is just there to find something that you don't know where a rando string or number might be in the record and just want to do a "fuck all" search across a number of likely fields to find it... and then presumably you'd be an adult and refine your search from there. LOL yeah right...
Customers get lazy and include that stupid option in their reports and we get a lot of.
Customer: "I always run this report (that includes the fuck all search) and now it isn't working. I want records that have ID 2222."
Me: "Yeah well that was only working because you were rando typing '2222' in like several fields and it would find those .... but now you quit doing that so it won't find them. If you want ID 2222, click the drop down and search by 'ID'. That will find it right away."
Customer: "But I want to just search by 'fuck all search' to find it..."
Me: "But then you get all these other records too right?"
Customer: "Yeah but I just delete them out of the spreadsheet ... "
Me: "Look watch this <screen share> there, look all records with an ID of 2222 and no more extra records you need to delete!!! How great is that?"
Customer: "But why do I have to do it this way now, I want to do it the old way..."
ಠ_ಠ
(granted I could add their ID to the fuck all search but we try to avoid adding too much because it gets out of hand / stops being useful the more fuck all it gets)3 -
I like the answer Peter Norvig, director of research at Google gave to this area of inquiry two decades ago. Some of the concepts show some age, but over all I think his advice is spot on:
https://norvig.com/21-days.html
I would certainly suggest someone spend some time learning some programming on their own BEFORE committing to something like a boot camp. They'd either figure out they didn't need it, or could better discern between different boot camp programs what will REALLY work for them and if it's REALLY worth the time and money. -
Alright guys, I need some advice now from you..
My employer is super impressed with my worked and they are willing to relocate me to the US (Seattle).
As you all are aware that I am actively trying to move out of my country but lately have realised that no matter what, it's home.
Also, I am way to close to my mother and don't want to leave her alone for an extended period of time as both my parents are ageing and I cannot be a selfish fuck to ignore them during their last phase of life.
I want to make the most to spend time with them.
Some key points that I need help with
- I am more inclined towards the UK/EU than US
- Need to spend time with parents/family
- Need to secure some cash for some key life moments
Some challenges:
- Cannot take parents along because they'd not be able to settle for more than 1.5 month outside for various reasons
- If I am moving out, why shouldn't I go to a place I love than a place I don't?
Some plans:
Plan A: Move to Seattle (6 months) > FAANG > Get a high paying high in India (all this in 2 year duration) > Settle down > Periodically travel Europe and explore hobbies
Plan B: Move to Seattle (6 months) > FAANG (optional) > Find a job in the UK/EU (4.5 year duration) > Fullfill EU dreams > Get a high paying job in India > Settle > Continue exploring hobbies
Plan C: Stay in India with current company (6 months) > IJP or EJP to the UK/EU (5 year duration) > Fullfill EU dreams > Get a high paying job in India > Settle > Continue exploring hobbies
I need to pick one while keeping in my that I can spend more time with parents and fullfill my dreams as well. I am confident that money will follow and I'll save enough for my retirement. Willing to trade off some extremely high paying jobs for a happier lifestyle.28 -
I have a few side project ideas. I started one of them a few months ago (project setup, dependencies, git repo, index page, very basic API and client functionality). But I cannot get myself to work on it or even think about it (for months now). The reason? I do not want to work on the client/frontend! I do not want to deal with React or Vue or Svelte or fuckjs or even jquery. It's a fucking mess.
For the backend, the requests are stateless: you get a request, handle it, and respond back. Need to update state? Database. That's it!
For the frontend, there's just tooo many states I can't keep up with! When the user checks or unchecks this checkbox, I need to maintain the state of the checkbox and maintain the all effects of changing the checkbox while syncing with the backend and making sure the elements are still styled correctly with the applied effects. Multiply that with all the expected interactive elements on the page. It's exhausting!4 -
Not a rant but wanted to get some thoughts from everyone.
I have health problems and unfortunately just had a seizure a few days ago.... Below is directed at my managers. They are nice guys and when I do get back I need them to accommodate although I feel the entire team should be run like this.
Now taking a step back, I see I need to reestablish my way of doing things/mojo. I cannot handle constant chaos and changes. I have to be in a calm, relaxed environment where I can think and enjoy coding: finding and building solutions. That's the summary of how I got into programming and learned to pick things up.
Furthermore, the ideas of the Phoenix Project and what I've shared over the years are actually what I need to be able to perform and excel. Probably the same for everyone and a good way to preempt burnout. It's just in this case, I am the first to go. I cannot be jumping around all the time and need to establish a comfort/expertise zone (but I do and can extend out when given enough time and opportunity).
I'm thinking the EU team probably operates like this, in a calm and orderly environment, less the rare issues.8 -
git add --all && git commit -m "Alright, here's a story for you. I set out to create a navigation mechanism on here, so we could have back buttons and tabs. I also wanted the ability to customise the UI elements. In order to do that, I combined two dependencies. Each one of them provides us with some of the functionalities we need and there's quite a bit of overlap between them. Moreover, each dependency creates the UI elements differently. So customising the UI is becoming a nightmare already, since it's getting harder to tell which one of them is affecting a UI element's appearance. In spite of all that, we have an app that navigates and has tabs."4
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Reading through a tutorial / blog post, getting all excited, then realizing it was dated 5 year ago, and with a completely obsolete version of the library you're working with.
Bloggers, tech doc people, and companies (I'm looking at YOU IBM) really need to at least date and version their articles! Please!
Mind you, search engines will happily serve up older code even when you're being specific (and no, I didn't mean "dance studio").
Is it any wonder developers bristle when high level management admonishes them for not "looking for help earlier"?1 -
Nobody has any use from a 80% finished project (so not finished at all) except it was a lot of time and money to get to that point. Oh boy I need to make progress on about 500 different projects to get them to a useful stage.
Also very important lesson: Dont have your anxiety take over when facing the "omg I have a 6 digit number of things on my 2do list" because you can't say no to the "awesome" ideas you have.
Also: I have made a rule for myself that prevents me from starting/working on a side project when I have important deadlines on main projects2 -
So we have outsourced one of systems (i dodnt had enough time to do it myself)
I know, i know, i could finish there.
We all know that there is a possibility if you need to add timestamp to table to know when row was created. Its worth mentioning its table used to count money.
So we have that thing, vouchers, and of course they have expiry date on them.
Orginal authors vanished (bielarus or how its in english, they have ongoing shitstorm, so i understand) and I needed to make a small adjustment.
So ya all would expect that field 'created_at' which defaults to current_timestamp() would be... Well current timestamp, of creation of record, right? Riiiiight?
WRONG.
Their hacky solutions INC decided its great idea to make that date of expiry, and current timestamp on use.
Becouee fuck logic and clarity.3 -
I connected oven to wifi using application on my phone but application on my phone didn’t connected to oven.
So now I need to disconnect oven from wifi to connect oven to my phone.
I connected dishwasher last month, first I needed to take a photo of qr code and send it to my laptop to be able to scan it cause it was to small and dishwasher app didn’t recognized it. Looks like dishwasher decided to disconnect from wifi this week so I need to repeat the whole process again.
I also bought connected washing machine and fridge but I think I will try to connect them next month when I manage hopefully to connect my oven.
Seriously home appliances iot is complete shit. Looks like there is no wide known standard of establishing connection so everyone is doing it on it’s own. All this security procedures to connect something to your local network are crap. I hope oven won’t disconnect from wifi.17 -
One of these days i'm gonna pop a blood vessel, trying to keep all my dotfiles organized: syncing the files themselves is easy, just shove them into git, the problem is that i have to install dependencies on different distros (Arch, Debian and Ubuntu):
The package names are different, the paths are different, fuck with Debian i need to compile from source anyway because most of the packages i need aren't available. Its taking me so much time writing distro-specific installers, just so i can deploy my setup on different machines...
Its at times like these that you appreciate just how mind-boggling fragmented Linux is as a platform :D8 -
I'm thinking about creating a central login system for all my websites, where you get redirected to and then login/sign up and then be redirect back. A bit like oAuth.
I have a few websites (and more in development) that use a login system, so that could be really useful to have... Especially because all of them are built from scratch and have their pros and cons. And security wise it's easier to concentrate on one system instead of all of them.
Another benefit is that you save some DB space, if you have lots of users!
And of course the users benefit from it as they'll be able to use all my websites with a single account.
What do you think about it?
I'll still need to do a bit of research on security but other than that, I only see benefits!2 -
A few months back, I had this interview with this guy to work at his startup. It was wonderful and he told me that I am hired (during the interview itself!). The position was of an intern as I was to start my co-op. So, to complete all the process with the university, I need offer letter to submit. The guy did not send me one, instead he sent an NDA. I emailed him explaining that I need an offer letter to submit to the university first before I sign any agreement. He stopped replying to my emails.
I had no other option so I contacted my university's co-op committee and explained them the situation. They contacted that guy and after that I get an email saying "We would like to move forward with other candidates".
IF YOU DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH REVENUE TO PAY, DO NOT CONDUCT INTERVIEWS. AND WHY THE FUCK DID YOU SAY "YOU ARE HIRED IN THE FIRST PLACE?!" MORON -
continuation of "testing is not needed" series
https://devrant.com/rants/4407958
a second former colleague (which works as backend dev) was seeking frontender, and remembered about the React frontender we both worked with.
I decided to warn him:
> *Giggles* According to his words, front is not like back. Git and testing aren't required there.
I received next replies:
> actually I don't need tests as well
> I did not write them all this time
> I have testers in a team for that, which do the testing for me
> I think I'll need it in cv though.
My comments:
I am trying to imagine their code... architecture, and I am a bit scarried to see how it looks like, are you?3 -
Ditch them completely.
In modern browsers you can emulate their behaviour easily.
They make your layout unnecessarily complex.
What the fuck am I talking about?
Tables in HTML. Fuck them. It may be just me and I still do not understand all of their defaults and when ti apply which style to which table element (thead, th, td...) but I found out that I can make almost everything with divs, flexbox or even some fixed widths or heights much easier to what I want than with tables.
Especially if you layout a complex scrolling component with static top row and static first column, it is nearly impossible with tables (and even without them you still need JS).
Ah, and fuck IE with a dirty trident. That thing can die in hell.2 -
Don't automatically count yourself out of positions because you haven't done them before, you can learn and grow.
I'm in the best job that I've ever had, but didn't meet all the criteria the vacancy had as "requirements". I had some experience in some of the areas that they were looking for, none in others, but they thought I was the right person for the job. I'll always be grateful for that.
At the same time, you need to be realistic, if you've never even heard of half the things on a job vacancy then it's probably not for you. -
It sucks when you’re also poor cause you need to go out to ex. empty trash can. If you’re living in small apartment it will get claustrophobic sooner or later. If you live with family you’re hero if you won’t kill them.
Now if I can’t travel around I see no gain at all and only pain points.
So if you can’t afford big house with swimming pool, gardener, maid, bar and bartender, private lake and car racing track you still need to go outside of your property.
So if you’re poor and you’re working remotely during pandemic you will most likely gain depression, claustrophobia and other mental illness that will sooner or later ruin your and other people’s life except psychologists if only you can afford one.2 -
About 6-9 months ago or so I try emphasizing the need to collect business rules with one of my colleagues. I tell them how it might take a few days to get the owners to define mutually exclusive and completely exhaustive terms, but doing so would immediately allow us to resolve all sorts of data quality issues. Well, naturally this gets ignored and then about a week or two ago the same person is wondering why they can't get consistent results when different people try to query the piece of shit "data system" that we have. Since they know I'm already leaving for another gig, I'm torn on whether or not to pull out the "I told you so..." card or to sit silently and listen to them piss and moan all day.6
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Few of my frnds are doing a small hardware project , they need to make an android app for that, they arent much of devs and hadnt used an IDE yet.
They downloaded Android Studio and installed it. On trying to start project , an error poped up saying SDK is missing .😑.I have to set the path of sdk for them. After that they tried to start the first project. It worked and after a minute or so everything was done. I just waited for all squiggly lines and red colour in code to disappear , but they didnt. 😶
"Messages" showed lot of errors. I am also a noob so most of them were unfamiliar to me. I was a bit busy and was about to leave, so i couldn't say much to them other than to "google the errors, there will be simple solutions for all ".
My point is, if this is the kind off problem someone faces while starting out in android programming, wont they feel like quitting even before their "hello world" application is done.4 -
Guys i have a macbook from my company but i used windows all the time. i cant setup the macbook as I need. No karabiner etc. Managed by the company. In Private i still use windows.
Switching back and forth between them is fucking up my dev experience. So i am looking at ways to change my windows keymapping instead. Any suggestions? Hardware and software appreciated. Maybe a keyboard which u guys have good exp with? Or a setup? Cant be the only one here .3 -
That was in the digitally-controlled analog equalizer I worked on (and still AM working on) with my dad, we kept sending something through the SPI line that was consistently sending clown vomit and corrupted data to the display and as a result my whole code was hanging and bootlooping like crazy.
The fix? No idea! Because I had (and still don't have) ANY step-based debugging, all I could do is try multiple ideas and see if one of them would stick. That ended up being the solution.
I still have a video of this issue, I just need to find it. I will post it here when I have it.3 -
Anyone ever had that one classmate/Co-worker who's condesending sometimes?
Like you tell them you and your friends busy, he asks how are you guys busy and you tell him, but he replies with his own list of stuff that sounds like a job for 5 people (sounds like bullsh*t to me..) that makes him busy and rubs it in our face like "aw come on, i can do all that with my eyes closed" and he makes sure everyone in the room could hear it, Not just us.
What had a long day... i need my cat. -
I figured it all out, where all the bad code comes from, I know it now!
I think good developers need two things, an ego that makes them wanting to be competent and perceived as such and (very important) a problem with authority!
All the bad code is written by people who wanted to be liked by their teachers. The PM and PO are their teachers now and they make everything possible for them. Technical debt and human costs are swept aside when the authorities want a stupid feature now - because they have to like you and you need to be a nice pet to whip! -
I have an idea of starting my own business and I need your feedback guys. Literally appreciate any kind of feedback.
So Im an android dev who has 3 years experience under his belt. I am working fulltime and I think its time to scale. I want to open my own agency where I would take on big clients and build apps for them. I personally am able to manage/see through the whole project, handle all communication and also work on the android side if necessary. I would start from smaller projects worth of 30-40k for startups, basically create MVP for them and charge for support after that.
Problem is that as far as I understand if you want to "open your own kitchen" you need to be well connected. I dont know any big clients who would trust and purchase my services, because after all who I am? Im nobody just a dev at this moment. So I need a strategy to build some relationships with businesses.
So Im thinking long game. What if I would first open a recruitment/hiring agency? I would focus in specifically mobile dev recruitment. I have the soft skills and I already participated in dozens of recruitment processes. I also have the tech skills, I would be a competent recruiter. Maybe I could do that for a year, just communicate between devs and clients and place devs. My thinking is that in around one year I would be able to build a massive network of clients and devs.
And then, I could try opening my own dev agency. Using my gathered contacts hopefully I could land some decent projects for start and build my team or outsource from that point on.
Ofcourse Im not sure if I could pull this off alone, I would need a detailed strategy and some mentoring. But what do you think is this a viable plan?2 -
woow PHPStorm is such an incredibly buggy piece of shit .... how can anyone work with such a buggy IDE?
It randomly looses settings on restart. A lot of functionality is just so poorly tested. Anyone ever really tried to work with the integrated DB tool?
Or the CSV plugin? there are countless bugs in both usability and function-wise.
But I guess that's because it's just plugins ... you know .. you don't need to use them ...
Is the PHP code formatter a plugin too? Guess I don't have to use it at all, if it randomly scrambles whole lines if I format with a missing } or some other improper syntax. Right, overall it's my fault, right??
Fuck you PHPStorm, and you IntelliJ too. you're not better at all.12 -
trying to refactor some code to implement a issue/feature on a ticket:
try option A. .... 2 hours later hit a Dead end.
try option B .... 1 day later.. another dead end.
try option B.2f ... I want to give up... wasting all my time...
Not sure what I'm suppose to do anymore..
It feels chaotic and dirty hacking to make it work.. and even now. I cannot get it to compile...
Only solution looks like Copy and paste a couple of classes and change one single variable. with huge preprocessor #if around them.
I need to take a shower I feel dirty now...1 -
Serious question:
Assuming we are (relative) computer pros: do we need an antivirus on Windows other than the built-in Windows Defender?
That is also assuming we're the only people using our computers.
I mean: we'd never click on ads (if we see them at all). We'd never click on links. We'd never install crapware.
Where are the risks we'd need a resource-hogging antivirus program for?9 -
I feel like whenever they are pretending you need to know all the patterns by memory, testing you on that, it's a nonsense and it even makes me stop wanting to enter the place.
Im not supposed to know them instantly, i use tools like the internet. Test my ability to solve problems, comnunicate, work in groups, but, specific stuff by memory? Why?5 -
So I guess this doesn't really fall under dev, more web and net admin, but here it goes.
I am trying frantically to migrate our (@Gerrymandered and I) website from a hosted solution with Namecheap to my new personal badass server, Vector. The issue is that I need to host multiple subdomains under one IP. I learned how to use apache2's VirtualHost feature, and eventually made them all work. But now we need to get our 3 year SSL Certs that we already paid for working. Try to get ssl pass through... Nope. Fine, just use the VHost then forward it unsecured to the local ip which only accepts connections from the Apache host. But wait! I want to access my ESXi config page remotely too! Good GOD it is a pain in the ass to get all of this working, but I somehow did. Evidence is at https://git.infiniit.co, which is hosted on the same network as the ESXi control panel. *Sigh of relief* now I can sleep right? 😥29 -
I can't find any good stickers on eBay that are from Germany or somewhere in Europe... Where do you guys buy awesome stickers? I live in Croatia, and I didn't have any luck finding any good stickers locally.4
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Code as often as you can. Don't burn yourself out, you don't have to strive for a daily masterpiece, but do something.
You're just starting and these new skills need constant work I you don't want to lose them immediately, so if your company tries to put you on something else that's not your job, don't be afraid to say no. If you start working IT for them "just to help out, just for now", you'll undo all your hard work and have to start again from scratch down the line.2 -
It finally happened. They just kept pushing, and pushing, and pushing. Asking for more and more features in an app that was a hard-coded demo from the beginning. Well it's all coming down now.
That database that was added in, missing half the API.
New features, broken.
Old features, broken.
Buttons, missing.
Drivers, need updating.
Yee, haw.
I tried to tell them, I really did. That maybe we should stop asking the client what they want, and instead sell them what we have. Well, now we have nothing.3 -
I want to do some kind of simple note-taking web-app, with a Golang-Backend.
I need to choose a database, but don't have any clue about DBs.
Every note will consist of 3 strings, let's call them content, pubkey and privkey and I want to retrieve a saved note by searching for pubkey.
Can you recommend me any particular DB or at least an all-round solution ?3 -
I have several tasks in my job. Not all of them are straight up dev, some are also student related. Since my coworker left I was rediculously overbudened, simply because the tasks I have to do are sooo far appart from one anothet. After talking to my boss, we get to hire some people to help (big yay!) But now it is upon me to write the recruitment adds so to speak and also talk to the people and interview them. What the heck I have no clue about this whatsoever xD i mean, i kinda feel honoured that my boss trusts me enough to do a pre selection for her. But damn. .-. I'm barely older then the applicants (it's all at uni and I'm a student and so are they)
Anyone got tips for interviews? I dont need them to do dev work. More like working with kids and presentation prep and support. -
feeling like shit at work because I'm not productive at all.... I'm a fullstack web dev and was assigned to create a java data importer with multiple sources, multiple scenarios and using various data types... What makes this difficult is that I'm not used to strictly typed languages, because I'm used to swapping variable types and nulling them down/whatever I need to do with them whenever I want. In java I need to assign the correct variable types, there are no asociative arrays . I've been fixing one issue this whole day. Litteraly one fucking issue. Maneged to fuck javas garbage collection even though it's supposed to be automatic. Fuck. I feel like I need to stay late, and program on the weekends to achieve anything with this assigment because right now I feel like I make 0 progress. Boss leaves for vacation next week for a week, and he's the other dev that theoretically should be working with me...4
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OK I need some help. I need to make sure I’m not losing my mind.
We are using an ERP which is hosted by another company. We are supposed to be able to access the data via a REST API. This works fine using Insomnia or Postman, but when I attempt to hit the API from my web application, CORS blocks the localhost origin.
I contacted the company’s technical team to request that they change the CORS configuration to allow localhost. They keep running me around in circles telling me that I don’t know what I’m talking about because localhost isn’t a DNS resolvable name and I’m doing something wrong and they don’t need to change any configuration.
They insist that if anything would need white listed, it would be my IP, not localhost.
I sent them screenshots and stack overflow posts and documentation links, showing them exactly what headers need to be set and where the configuration needs to be set in the ERP. They tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about.
They tell me that if I can hit the API from Postman, I can hit it from my browser.
Am I losing my mind? Have I fundamentally misunderstood CORS all these years? I’m sure I’m right. But I’m starting to feel like I’m crazy.19 -
when i look at the code structure of the project i work on with my friends, i always think about how to implement the SOLID principles of bob martin for clean code
... and then i think about the clusterfuck of almost unmaintainable code that has been created over time and all the unit testing that doesn't exist at all and how much time and effort it would need to correct that code and how i realize that i don't even understand the principles and how to implement them
... and then i give up and go on coding even more mess
... and then i repeat😅😖😩3 -
This fucking manual with their abstract ssl section is driving me nuts. Why do you need so many keys? Fucking jks!
Fuck your pseudonyms, and why in the name of the holy cunt do you have to cope them with aliases?
Jerry, barry, tango. You all get a fucking certificate!
Jerry is an asshole, barry is a cuntand I don't even know who tango is, but fuck tango in particular! -
What is everyone's opinion on companies/organisations 'too big to fail'...?
I was just pondering on how 'just Google it' has become so 'natural' as a way of saying search the Internet. The more I think about it, the less I like it.
I know the chances of them failing/crumbling are neary zero (hence the name) but if an org, Ie Alphabet, made some shit decisions and bankrupted their company, what would happen then? Any ideas? I don't mean in terms of social fallout, economic etc.
I mean in terms of network infrastructure, them being such a central part of 'the web', all their Dns services, their backbone links, Google drive, Google fiber etc. What would happen to all user data? Just be destroyed?
I've never 'seen' a large tech company collapse, but just wander as to how that process would work for such a huge organisation, and the literal mountains of data they have which will need destroying or relocating.
Inb4 watch Mr robot hurrr5 -
The most stressful day of month.
I need to put hours into hour counting programs so computer can analyze those hours using deep learning algorithms and pay me a wage I don't deserve.
Each program work differently.
One of it works inside the local company network.
Other one I need to connect outside from company network.
In all of them I can't make mistake or I need to write to someone to fix my mistakes.
One of this programs use java applet, other is simple php website.
One of them blocks row in calendar when I click so when I login again and click I can't edit this row because it's locked by me who is editing this row.
One of them is requesting me to provide my work in minutes.
I need to follow strict procedures to report any holidays or national holidays that I need first figure out when they happen.
Wish me luck.1 -
I'm in my final year of high school, 17 years old, hoping to go to TAFE to do a coding course. I've done some HTML, CSS and Java at school and I only really know the basics of them all. I've been learning python in my free time and fuck man is it confusing. I love coding but it's so confusing at times, I really need some words of encouragement. Thanks guys :)4
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Migrating PC's makes migrating phones look easy... even with all the bricking...
Hopefully the hardware won't fail....
So many apps (a lot of my own), projects, data, configs that need to be copied and reinstalled....
I just got the basic ones installed today and probably not even done, just can't remember them all...
Ok time for TV....2 -
Screw our credit card processor so hard. The powers that be decided to sign with them because their rates were better. That's it. Never mind the fact that they don't make/work with mobile readers, which we need. Never mind the fact that their app is trash and is lacking basic features. Never mind the fact that their support is non-existent. Never mind the fact that when I request a new POS machine, I don't hear back for 6 months, and have to follow up again only to find they forgot about it. Never mind the fact that their POS machines can't handle 2 merchants like our ancient, "out-dated" one could, and so we need to spend double the money and have 2 POS machines sitting on the counter. Never mind the fact that their website is trash and lacks basic functionality. Never mind the fact that I cannot manage our user list (which changes CONSTANTLY), or even VIEW IT. I need to email them for all of this, and they may or may not respond. Never mind the fact that I'm going to spend my entire Friday scrolling through thousands of transactions, looking for one specific one, because their website doesn't even allow me to search for a specific transaction amount. Never mind all of that. Slightly lower rates, baby!1
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So I graduated last year learned everything I would need to succeed in the job world. I got to my first rotation, I solved a total of 6-7 jiras in the past 6 months. I got to my second rotation, my new team is pretty much all remote and it’s been 2 weeks that i have been sitting idle. Their code base is not on git they’re not organized as my first one and I’m confused as to what they do, there’s not really any confluence and the deployment of code is done via uploading a jar. I really want them to adopt a structure like my last team or something similar because but I don’t know enough how to implement a new deployment process. I feel like sitting idle is the worst so I’m gonna start to see if I can implement a proper structure for them but who knows if they’ll even use it.3
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what is so fucking wrong with solving all the problems you set out to solve and finding new ones to solve goddamn it ????
why do I constantly have to revisit shit I already did ?
There is no expertise except in problems people solve all the time because eventually specific unused knowledge fades !
Note i say eventually, not suddenly and overnight as has been accomplished previously.
Point is why can't I have my nice organized set of solutions to my common use-cases solved and not have to be bugged anymore and compile a nice list of them so I can page through when I need jesus christ !6 -
The SIM card saga goes on:
To verify yourself, you need to go to some postal office and show them your ID and stuff. Not that this is complicated or anything (well actually, it is. Welcome to 2018 in Germany. We use more papers than potheads for the simplest shit), but you need to have a valid ID. Valid as in NOT EXPIRED. What the fuck. Why does my ID expire. Do I stop existing 3 years after getting it? What does it mean if it is, why is it culpable to have your ID expired. And who gets charged for having none, I mean obviously my ID doesn't identify me anymore?
What the hell man. I don't exist for 6 months now. Am I law free as not identifiable entity or how does it work?
And now the real question:
We got something called Bafög in Germany. Basically you get a bit money while studying. (I still work tho, I don't get really much from it.)
To apply for it, you need some tax number, which seemingly can be seen as a proof of my existence and my identity.
Why is this enough, why don't I need a valid ID there?
Germany is weird man. On the one hand government is all social and you get help if you need it but on the other hand you need to sacrifice 17 virigins to apply for said help..2 -
I am a cs student at first class. Obviously we take an algorithm lesson. However, despite we have learned all things related to OOP , we didn't even learn switch case statement not even bubble sort algorithm or anything related to the algorithms. Because of that in my free time I learn this stuff individually. I know we will learn these things in the second class but it doesn't make sense to program anything without knowing them because you need to use them. You can use standard library but that doesn't mean you don't need to know how that works.
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tldr: i take pride of our code! It hurts when someone calls it wrong when i know it was right.
So there was this integrations team that are trying to connect to our api. This team has been throwing different people to work with us. We even taught them how to use postman/soapui with ssl, even to the point that we search stackoverflow to resolve their code-level issues and left us halfway, then came back again repeating all process. A year passed, they came back with the same issue... now all answer that they get from us was to “review past conversation”, Today, they insist that we repeat ssl onboarding process as they are having issues with their current one, we insisted not to do it, and told them we (including them) can proceed without changing the client ssl. And told them we had a snippet sent to resolve their issues, but instead told us in a rude way, our sample is wrong. I was challenged to prove that we can make it work by eod. With their wrong sense of pride as theyve been working for that issue for long, they started throwing tantrums on us, saying that we do not need to make them feel that they do not know what their doing. man! Cmon, its you who requested that snippet few years back, then you tell us you dont need it as it is not working, in the first place, it is not our job to code for you asses,...i left the channel after. it was escalated quickly to management and accounts team(those people who only cares for traffic/money).. asked to return to the channel, spoonfed the details to them, provided a working snippet and left again.not sure what happened next.,. I hope this started a fire on our management to handle such incompetence. -
It's been a good month where honestly I had nothing to rant about. Pretty much doing my own project setting up ELK.
But last few days I had to return to the reality called teammates....
It where it ok... I mentored one of them, then did the code review yesterday
And that's when the shit hit the fan.
I told them to do X but then they did Y instead thinking that they were smart.
In hindsight they seem to have no idea wtf they were doing, inexperienced and couldn't even use console.log and JSON.stringify to debug object states...
Which course now reminded what's wrong with this team, you got people jumping around stacks and projects so they're all mediocre on all of them. Rather than having specific people being good at one of them (aka more experienced than a noob).
And if course this morning, manager asked me to look into something on a program I haven't support in a while (there are a free people that are more experienced and know the current state better). And he said this is quick and urgent... And actually when he said that I'm like uh.... don't think so....
And last thing is we had to rerun a report in production so needed the shipper ten to do it. Asked them look yesterday, users were waiting.
Today... Still not done. And well I actually can run the report myself locally.. takes 5mins but in production they need to reload the data but that should take at most 20mins... Either way... Nothing was done.
Oh and I just remembered I raised a request to it SA group to have some not script installed... That not done either.
And this is why relying on others it at least these people is a bad idea..... Unless your are capable of firing them... -
A medical equipment that you can attach to employees and excruciatingly kill them as soon as they say things like (please note that the list is not limited and we should use a speech to text API to provide NLP states for the meaning - I want to catch all false negatives!! Kill them all!!!!):
- It works on my machine
- I tested it before!
- Haskell is a terrible language
- Big data and actionable insights
- why do you need unit tests here?
- I am a recruiter
- Anything that comes with the following construction as well: "I don't have anything against X, but..."
Any other suggestions of phrases?2 -
So I want to make an app...
You sign up with an email and phone number which is connected to a firebase or something idk yet
You add all your friends/family through email or phone number
When you need to, if you go to one of your friends, it will send notifications to your friends phone and will force it to make a sound on full volume, even if it’s on silent. Sort of like a find my iPhone for friends, or when you need them in a n emergency and you think they’re sleeping.
Of course they’ll be options to turn it off/block incoming notifications.
How would I go about doing like the whole connecting to the other phone part?5 -
I read one article about an asteroid causing destruction 10+ years ago and now Google seems to think that I need to know about all the 180 million asteroids orbiting in the asteroid belt. And fill my news feed with facts about each one of them, and which ones could potentially wipe out life from Earth.
I hate this kind of profiling these companies do.3 -
I'm facing something strange, I have set the following headers in Nginx to return:
strict-transport-security: max-age=31536000; includeSubDomains
vary: Accept-Encoding
x-content-type-options: nosniff
X-Firefox-Spdy: h2
x-frame-options: SAMEORIGIN
x-xss-protection: 1
But I only get them when I browse root of my website, but if I go to https://website.com/subPage
those headers are not returned, now I did set them only on
"location / {}"
Any other headers I am missing that needs to be set?
in nginx, but how do I force it on all sub pages, or there is no need?2 -
Ahh, management. They now decided to implement yet another clown role. Release manager…
😬
I am leaving. I just must leave this workplace!
They have so many roles now and it’s getting increasingly difficult to avoid them. I thought we were flying low before to avoid the radar (we use ci/cd, all automated, deploy all days of the week, so we are good. I mean, we go from business need to implement with (some) quality in minutes. Yes, we make mistakes and we fix them rapidly and continuously).
It will be difficult to stay. I really thought I would enjoy it here but management is making it pretty clear that they are not serious about software. They want fancy titles and pretend to work.
Fire em all I say! No one will notice that they are gone. 🤷🏼♂️4 -
When it comes to dev tools, It seems like everywhere you turn these days all you get is a rabbit hole trip to GitHub's issue queue WTF! Oh, and there are so many tools out there so we all now need to have a task management tool which just add to the complexity of local dev development, fuck that! To make matters more absurd, those who write them tools think that it is a great idea to rename commands between each minor release because why not after all machines know how to decipher changes right? Wrong, last I checked, machines rank high on the autism spectrum and won't find a command unless you lead them directly to its file system location. The command fuck you could not be found are you sure you spelled it correctly, or did you mean fuck me? is all that it's capable of. Sigh...4
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How do you deal with situation when u need to merge multiple feature branches to develop branch? All feature branches have develop branch as base. So as soon as one feature is merged to develop then there will be contlicts in other feature branches.
Should I merge first feature branch to develop, then rebase feature2 branch on most recent develop and then merge the rebased feature2 branch to most recent develop and continue like that?
What if later I need to do hotfixes for previously merged branches? Should I revert them then rebase them on most recent develop and once again merge it to develop? Or should I just make small commits for fixes.10 -
Let your friends play youtube music on your account during party, get them all drunk and play some random shit and suddenly all your music recommendations are fucked up, that’s how this super expensive and amazing AI works in a real world where there is more than one person.
I need to skip 10 songs now to get to one that’s decent.10 -
i hate children, all of them, every single one. all of those disgusting freeloaders!!! they don't pay money at all, yet they get to enjoy lavish lifestyles!! we need to stop this and dump them all in the trash! subscribe to my course to learn the best ways to kill children: ibeatkids.com3
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Big ass company paying me fat stacks to remake their 3 important legacy projects (hospitals, gov, big companies) into another stack.
Will require me to no-life.
Or chill local medium sized company which creates apps to help museums, education and other wholesome shit.
Feels like i need to choose the big one because "carreer" but i am haunted by all the burn-out horror stories online.
Currently on my way to the latter for my last interview with them.3 -
Need some advice here.
I am into the third month at my new job in a new country. My new workplace and I are all basically Chinese (Ching chong ling long). Tentatively, we should have no problem getting along right?
Till now, I had not discovered a common topic that we can engage in. All conversation between me and them were short-lived. I go my way and as do they. However, I still like to have some decent conversation or human interaction. I felt socially dead and excluded. Seeing them having fun together and not being able to be included, felt...dread.
I had been feeling lonely in this new country for quite awhile. It makes me question why I came here in the first place and comtemplate about returning to where I came from.
If you had this kind of situation before or if this is you, what would you do?4 -
I have been learning android dev in android studio for the past 20 days from the book "Head First Android Development" and as I am starting new chapters, there are always new methods, inner classes... of new widgets getting introduced to me and it's getting hard to memorize all these stuff!
Can someone give me some advice? In serious need of help.
Do all the professional android developers keep a guide with them while they are developing apps?5 -
Is there anyway I can get database design and algorithms of existing apps? Like the one that foodpanda riders use in which they tell their availability time for whole week. And then the app sorts them through out the calendar.
I know Its dumb to question this but for my university project I have a chat app that has operators who work 24 hrs. The operators needs to tell their availability of whole week and after submission i need an algorithm to sort all the operators to make sure everytime someone's online 24hrs 👀2 -
#rant
Is it just me or is the Android Storage Access Layer completely fucked up?
All I want to do is upload an image in 3 sizes (one of them 4k, if available), the correct orientation, on devices >= Android 2.1 (yes, including Samsung crap), without 100m of libraries to an S3 bucket and I need a PHD + an Armada of physical test devices to do so? WTF? -
Vim! Don't need all that shit that other editors bring with them. I like being able to choose everything I want, know it's installed on any box I go to, even over ssh with no gui, and I can write my own plugins if I can't find what I need.
And I don't have to break my fingers holding 17 modifier keys in emacs.2 -
I need to actually build up my website since all that's there is a digital resume currently
I have too many ideas for what I want like a simple blogging space, project showcase space, my teacher recommend a lanking page, and a better digital resume. but limited free time to figure out where to start and what to use and that's really demotivating
I'm thinking about using node or vue to learn a framework but again I'd have to learn them since all I know is normal unmodified js. And again where the hell do I start4 -
!Dev
Fuck you realtek and your shitting laptop nics and the companies that use them. Just a year later I cannot garuntee more than 10 minutes of uptime of WiFi all other devices operate fine leaving the laptpp with the realtek card. I need to use third party drivers to be sane. I have already dksabled the option to allow the computer to turn you off to save power3 -
Anybody else getting annoyed with VSCode lately? I’m constantly getting updates to the editor and various plugins that add near-forced autocomplete suggestions, cursor hijacking, codelens and inlay hints (messes up spacing and layout), etc. It’s starting to drive me crazy! Just let me write my code! I love the syntax highlighting and autocomplete, but developer tools need to be optional, not have their off button buried behind some 5-layer JSON object that’s not documented anywhere!
I just want to write code, and I want my editor to be a tool, not an annoying little bee swarming my face all the time trying to get me to do things I don’t want to do! Microsoft and plugin devs need to stop enabling these obtrusive features by default and put them behind a “New Features” wizard or something!3 -
I have always wanted to be a writer. I just pirated Dan Brown's origin and immediately felt bad. suddenly I got this feeling, if god decides to include all the pirates as sinners and tries to wipe them out like Thanos did I am pretty sure 75% of them would be outta this world (considering even mp3 downloads as piracy). I might need a special therapy to calm myself down if at all I write a book and I find it pirated across the internet.1
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My tech lead rookie mistake of the week. Makes ids in the MySql DB big integers.
Now react, python and pinecone are all converting them to scientific values resulting into invalid or missing values and lookups.
Fml I need to change companies.12 -
!rant
To all the devs that got their stickers + @dfox and @trogus: do the stickers adhere to uneven surfaces without leaving glue or bits of the sticker material behind? Because I've reached the amount of ++ needed to ask for my stickers (I'm gonna ask them around xmas time so it can be like a xmas present 😀 and also so my brother doesn't take them) but I don't know if I can safely stick them there and remove them if need be
My computer has this circular pattern around the ASUS logo and the area around the touchpad is also uneven, it has some grid pattern
I don't have any stickers on it so devRant's may be the first :D5 -
Got a mac as a gift for my sister for christmas. Shes still in uni and wants to learn ux/ui. I plan on buying sketch licence for her for 1 year. But then I started thinking that shel need more, like photoshop or ms word apps. Is there some place where I could buy all of them as a bundle possibly cheaper?4
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i would like to address a serious problem in our everyday society. why is there no mouse flavored cat food? it is outrageous. i have written to all cat food companies i know about this issue, but the best response i have gotten is an automated one saying ' your request has been noted'. i have threatened to take them to court. this is something we need to adress9
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!rant
For what reason has windows update settings in its group policies if it completely ignores them? 😠😡
I disabled everything that regards windows update, because I had to copy 80gb (my vm with all the dev tools installed) from PC A to PC B.
Well , guess what I saw this morning..
I am really annoyed by this, but I need windows for my steam games - I guess steam rescues Windows once more this time..1 -
I like the look and feel of gnome, but its extension system is SO FUCKING BROKEN. Like ho-ly-shit... You need a fucking browser extension to install or update them! Since not too long you can also do that via 'tweaks', but guess what: IT DOESN'T FUCKING WORK.
...
Now that I think about it, if I need all these extensions to make gnome nicer, maybe gnome isn't all that good. Any suggestions for other wm's?1 -
Question for intellij idea users:
Does anyone know of a plugin which would allow me to customize order of folders in my project view?
Now all modules are sorted by alphabetical order and I want to sort them by app logic.
I already tried Armory https://plugins.jetbrains.com/plugi... which seems to do everything I need, but after restarting IDE the folder order is not being saved properly.3 -
I had some fun times in college.
Me: This book is too outdated, we need updated information for the video capture card presentation. I'd do it but this time I'm busy.
Teammate: I'll do it.
Me: oh wow really? Thanks!
Next week...
Teammate: here, take a look. I updated the information
Me: Yeah, I can see that all of those 10+ year old models have some fresh google search information in them. Thanks. -
Why the hell my boss gonna 'pimp me out' to another business for a project he's working on with them. Basically introduced me to them over email with a few days deadline. Still can't get all the details I need.1
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So I'm sitting here, one monitor has a project I am working on for computing, which once done, I need to write somewhere between 30 and 70 pages of documentation, and the other screen has a half completed 6 page documentation for a game I made in Game Dev.
If I go into backend programming, am I really going to need to do all this documentation or is it just one of them things that colleges do that has no relations to reality?
(Also if I go to uni, will I need this level of documentation there too?)10 -
I don't... for some incredible reasons all of my friends are interested in what I do. I don't have any kind of problem with them. I just explained them that I have this passion that could take a lot of my time but if they need I'll be there for them.
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We have a prgram at the office that requires me to turn off everyone's antivirus for it to work properly. This has been the case for 2 months while tye software company fixes it. When our computers restart for any reason, the antivirus turns back so I have to turn it off again. I can't give peple the password though because that is the password for a few systems. I get 4 emails today from 4 people that know damn well what the problem is that all say the same thing "I cant figure out why this program wont work. We need to get this fixed or I cant do my job" all with the branch manager CC'd.
Idiots. All of them are damn idiots. 😐🔫 -
I couldn't find a program for this so I'm making one. Cli based. Have a json object you need to unmarshal in golang? Yeah I was getting tired AF making structs for all of them with the json tag name over and over, so I'm mid way through a python script that generates the structs for you. I'll link it here when I'm done.
And if you're wondering why python? Dynamic object definitions. That's why it's trouble in go in the first place.3 -
Working on a portfolio project - I ran some tests, everything is all good - 100% passing. Computer freezes - pop_os has been giving me shit lately, so I have to restart. Fine.
I get back into code, i re-run pytest - nothing works. Python apparently can't find my modules anymore. I try a few things, nothing. Why? Who the fuck knows - "oh you need this conftest file", "oh you need to remove __init__ from this directory or that one", "oh it's a pytest version iss---" no, no, no - listen here you little shit, it was working two seconds ago. Tell me why and how software I wrote with the most basic ass package structure - literally TWO directories suddenly has no fucking clue how to import the modules. hmm? Even from within the app directory, app.server now no longer recognizes imports from app.main or app.database.
ALL of this worked. It works in new directories without dedicated venvs - it works in new directories with my global python install - it works with any one of my conda envs - it works on other computers - WHY doesn't it work in THIS directory all of a sudden?? Ugh.
What's terrible is that relative imports will probably solve it within the app dir, but the tests dir won't accept them. Moreover, vs code autocompletion can find all the modules, but python itself cannot. Fucking infuriating shit like this is.1 -
No matter how much trickery is added
No matter how many distractions
In the end if even one person deviates
They may as well be punished
Because they likely did or enabled something wrong by trying to cause a check that distracted someone important
And a person who is caught cannot be helped by their fellows right away if at all because it associates them with the crime
Imagine the horror of one of us fully enabled catching one of them doing something horrible
The loud scream of fury the last thing they heard before the icy feeling of metal entering their body is experienced and noone could help them
Outside very specific times and places the best that could be accomplished is a temporary suspension of punishment
Eventually because of how convoluted things have become punishment will be effect
Now I want to smile
And act appropriately
Because I need to
I'm so happy
And I can't believe this is happening to me3 -
Recently I was made my eCommerce website but to running a website on search engine ranking, I need one product content writer. Who can write my eCommerce product description of all product one of my friend recommend me https://contentmajestic.com/service.... I want to know if there anyone getting writing service from them?
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So notable international development company who promised changes by 8 days ago but halted dev 2 weeks before delivery and claimed they were shippable but need to meet with us first admits that was a lie without admitting it... Also no longer stressing us for the next payment anymore... Looks like the shit is on the other foot now bruv!
lmao
This means 2 more months of me doing analyst and QA work.... I just want to cooooooooooode. I haven't seen the code for this application and I'll have the joy of integrating all the duct tape into our ecosystem. I can hear them reeling the duct tape off all the way in India at this point.
It's probably gonna be so shit... -
As part of mentoring folks was having a round table. All wanted tech help. lists of things to do, learning syllabus, techs to bet on, projects, promotion mantras etc etc.
I asked them how's the work. All started rating about overload and overworked. How difficult it is to find time to do anything else. It became noisy.
So asked how they will find time to do all the above without time. Do they really need mentoring on time management and prioritisation ?
Felt like my invisible tws anc headset turned ON at that moment3 -
FML so I have recently learned I am mandated (nodoby asked me if I wanted to do it, management just assumed I would) to help and train an offshore SQA team with 10 hours of jet lag to automate their tests on physical hardware because everything they do is manual and their environment is all mocked including hardware... there is barely any doc on how they test their shit or on what they even do. I need them to show me their shit work on goddamn zoom. And then once I manage to do this by some fucking miracle, I need to show them how to take over my already automated project.
Dudes cannot even code, how the fuck am I supposed to do this? Worse is I was told I can't impose our tested infrastructure and libs on them because "we have to give them flexibility" or some bullshit.
Fucking pay cheaply 5 people offshore to get fuck all done and then put the weight on my shoulders when you are surprised it does not work? You bunch of management fucks, eh?
Lucky I am getting some shiny offers elsewhere.3 -
I vaguely remember some joke about how difficult networking is and how some Jeff Atwood blog post I think makes the comparison about analogy of sending actors in a taxi to somewhere being compared to a packet, anything can happen inbetween but you will get the packet or something indistinguishable from the original at the other end if all goes well.
Are occasional/intermittent 503 service unavailable or 504 gateway timeouts unavoidable for microservices calling another external microservice?
Like at that point isn't receiving a 503 or 504 from something else, somewhat outside my jurisdriction, albeit I am fucked if I am depending on them and need to fail gracefully.3 -
Need an advice on syncing large amounts of small files. For starters I have 2 million of ~20-25kb sized files in dropbox. Syncing it with my local machine is a pain in the ass (API limits syncing to 4-5 files per second, so I will need at least 96 hours just to take out everything from dropbox).
Recently I started looking into self hosted cloud solutions. I fiddled around with nextcloud but it's client limits syncing to 5-6 files per second as well. Accessing nextcloud via webdav from a rclone client I was able to up the syncing speed to 15-25 files per second but that's all.
Any solutions where I should host 2mil of files and would be able to sync them fast to my own machine with some cloud client when I need it to?5 -
In Flutter I have to display in a ListView all the days of the current month, but starting from current day
I was thinking to get the number of days and the corresponding day (Monday, ecc.) saving them in an Array and then create the widgets dynamically in the ListView.
But I have no idea on how to achieve the corresponding day.
I need something like in the image